You Love & You Learn Podcast – Details, episodes & analysis

You are in for a TREAT with this episode, which truly felt like a therapy session for me. I sat down with Thais Gibson who has over a decade working as a practitioner and specializes in blending attachment theory, psychology, and subconscious reprogramming. 

We discuss what Thais refers to as the “relationship shadow” and explore why our partners can be so dang triggering (it’s not what you think!) and how to navigate these triggers more mindfully.

For more about Thais, check out:

Website: https://university.personaldevelopmentschool.com/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool

Learning Love book: https://attachment.personaldevelopmentschool.com/learning-love

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thepersonaldevelopmentschool/

—

Additional resources:

• Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access)
• Visit my website
• Connect with me on Instagram

Have you ever felt like you were not going “fast enough” in your journey to heal relationship anxiety or ROCD? Maybe you’ve seen other people share their wins and felt like you’re just not getting it. It’s easy to beat ourselves up when we compare to other people’s highlight reels–but today I am peeling back the curtain of what healing relationship anxiety actually looks like. 

Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! 

—

Montage Fallacy article by Herbert Lui

Additional resources:

• Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access)
• Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching
• Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety
• Visit my website
• Connect with me on Instagram

I was pleasantly surprised when I listened to a podcast with James Sexton, a divorce lawyer who’s seen the ups and downs of couples for 25+ years in his career and has a lot of wisdom to share from it. 

Today’s episode focuses on a key thing he sees that leads to relationship breakdown: 1. Not knowing what you want or need, and 2. Not knowing how to express what you want or need. I explore different categories that it can be helpful to explore your needs in, two book recommendations to help you get started, and tips for HOW to communicate needs in a helpful way.

If you want to explore this more in private coaching…

Sign up here.

If you’re loving the podcast…

JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month.

Books mentioned in the episode:

Eight Dates by John and Julie Gottman

Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson

*Amazon affiliate links

—

Additional resources:

• Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access)
• Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching
• Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety
• Visit my website
• Connect with me on Instagram

This simple reframe has helped me (and dozens of my clients) in moments of relationship anxiety: zooming in when you’re thinking too big-picture, and zooming out when you’re hyper-fixated on something in the present moment. I explain why this matters in your relationship and specific examples of zooming in and out to help manage your anxiety.

If you’re loving the podcast…

JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month.

—

Additional resources:

• Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access)
• Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching
• Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety
• Visit my website
• Connect with me on Instagram

This topic is LONG overdue, and that is feeling unworthy and how this affects our life and the ways we show up in our relationships. I’m thrilled to have had the chance to speak with Sarah Baldwin, who is a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner and expert in the field of trauma resolution. 

We explore reasons we feel unworthy, how to become kinder to ourselves, how to reconnect with our body if we’ve been stuck up in the mind our whole life, what it means to be connected to your ‘truth,’ and more. 

For more of Sarah’s work:

https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/worktogether

—

If you’re loving the podcast…

JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month.

—

Additional resources:

• Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access)
• Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching
• Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety
• Visit my website
• Connect with me on Instagram

Are you clear about what your needs are in a relationship? If so, do you communicate them openly with your partner?  If you answered no to either question, you’ll enjoy this conversation. Our partners cannot read our minds, especially if we are not even sure what we’re expecting in the first place, so it’s important to take time to think about these things.

To explore this, I chatted with Gayane Aramyan, a marriage and family therapist who specializes in perinatal mental health support for women and couples. She’s been with her husband for 15 years and has learned a lot along the way of how to continue to speak up for your needs (and clear out resentments) through lifes’ transitions (including becoming parents).

For more of Gayane’s work:

https://www.therapywithgayane.com/

https://www.instagram.com/therapywithgayane/

—

If you’re loving the podcast…

JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month.

—

Additional resources:

• Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access)
• Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching
• Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety
• Visit my website
• Connect with me on Instagram

Common questions I am asked are “what if I never had a honeymoon phase?” and “is it bad if I’ve had relationship anxiety/ROCD from the beginning of my relationship?” 

My two cents is how long we’ve had RA/ROCD is less relevant than what is contributing to the RA/ROCD…and that’s exactly what I explore in this episode! What factors may have contributed to RA/ROCD being there from the beginning, and how to move forward if this is your experience.

If you’re loving the podcast…

JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month.

—

Additional resources:

• Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access)
• Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching
• Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety
• Visit my website
• Connect with me on Instagram

Have you ever felt bored in your relationship and worried that something is wrong? Maybe you’ve wondered “is this normal, shouldn’t things feel more exciting than this?” I’ve been there, and this has been a trigger I have struggled with myself, so I wanted to explore it more. 

In this episode, I explore:

• 3 reasons why healthy love can feel boring
• What inner work you can do if you feel disappointed by boredom
• What actions you can take in your relationship if you feel bored 

If you’re loving the podcast…

JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month.

—

Additional resources:

• Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access)
• Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching
• Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety
• Visit my website
• Connect with me on Instagram

It can be so hard to trust ourselves when there is so much relationship information and advice out there. Even well-meaning friends and family can add their two cents when sometimes, we really didn’t need it!

In this episode, I sat down with a client of mine who shares her journey of trusting her intuition in her first serious relationship. We also explore the fear of being attracted to other people and how to discern if you should listen to other people’s advice.

To get access to the “Is it Anxiety, or Intuition?” webinar that’s mentioned in the episode…

JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month.

—

Additional resources:

• Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access)
• Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching
• Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety
• Visit my website
• Connect with me on Instagram

Today we’re diving into something that has a big impact on our overall mental health and wellbeing; our vagus nerve. Amanda Armstrong, neuroscience and trauma-informed anxiety & depression coach (and now AUTHOR!) is back on the podcast to help walk us through how to improve our mental health by working with our vagus nerve - the nerve that connects our brain and body, and regulates our nervous system.

Amanda has so much wisdom to share (check out episode 50 in case you have not heard that one yet) and I was very excited to bring her back for another conversation.

To order Healing the Vagus Nerve book and dive more into Amanda’s world:

Order Healing the Vagus Nerve on Amazon (here)

Website: https://www.riseaswe.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amandaontherise/?hl=en

—

If you’re enjoying the podcast…

JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month.

—

Additional resources:

• Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access)
• Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching
• Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety
• Visit my website
• Connect with me on Instagram