The Psychology of your 20s – Details, episodes & analysis

In our 20s, we can feel intense pressure to be extraordinary, to stand head and shoulders above the pack, to thrive across all aspects of our life. But when we put pressure on ourselves to be extraordinary, we can fall victim to social comparison, lose sight of what we really want, and experience long-term feelings of inadequacy. In this episode, unpack where the pressure to be extraordinary comes from, and reframe our thinking towards a healthier, more balanced approach. We explore: 
• How social media creates an ‘artificial average’, making us feel inadequate 
• Why being gifted as a child can lead to burnout as an adult 
• The myth of linear success, and why taking a scenic route is just as worthy 
• Why learned helplessness can make us stop trying at all 
• How we can expand our definition of being ‘extraordinary’ into many areas
• Why our relationships, not our work achievements, are the biggest predictor of long-term happiness Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com  Our favourite sources:  https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2020/nov/05/under-pressure-why-athletes-choke https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8KkKuTCFvzI https://paulasanderson.com/2020/12/04/30-under-30-and-the-pressure-to-be-extraordinary/ The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Anxiety has a way of making ordinary moments feel life-or-death. A simple interaction can feel significant, a passing thought can spiral into catastrophe, and your body can react as if something is deeply wrong - even when rationally you know you’re probably okay. In this episode, we get into the neuroscience behind anxiety - why your brain becomes obsessed with certain thoughts, why false alarms feel so convincing, and what actually helps when you want to feel less trapped inside your own mind. We explore: 
•        Why anxiety feels so intense and urgent
•        Our physical and emotional reactions to anxiety
•        The role of GABA and glutamate in anxiety
•        Why trying to ‘stop thinking about it’ doesn’t work
•        How avoidance perpetuates the anxious cycle
•        Practical ways for living with an anxious brain Happy listening! Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com  Our favourite sources:  https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9559819/ https://www.nature.com/articles/nrn2555 https://www.nature.com/articles/s41386-022-01332-2 https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S027273580000057X The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We are bombarded with ideas about how we should look, behave, and be. But instead of trying to constantly strive for the societal ideal, we can cut through the noise another way - and that’s by cultivating self-love. The funny thing is, psychology actually shows us that the more confident and self-loving we are, the more attractive we become. It’s a win-win… if we can get there. Today, we're going to talk about how loving ourselves makes us more attractive. We unpack: 
•  The power of the mind-body link and self-esteem
•  Why plastic surgery might not make us happy 
•  The damaging physical effects of negative self-talk
•  How simple behavioural changes affect how others see us
•  Why cultivating self-love is the greatest gift we can give ourselves Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com  The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Uncertainty is the defining emotion of our 20s. Career paths, relationships, identity, purpose ... so much of this decade is marked by not knowing. Does that have to be as uncomfortable as we think it does? In today’s episode, we unpack the psychology of uncertainty: why our brains fear it, how it triggers anxiety and avoidance, and why trying to “figure it all out” might be doing more harm than good. We explore:

• The neuroscience behind our discomfort with the unknown
• Why perfectionism is often a mask for our fear of uncertainty
• The cultural myths that make us believe we need a step-by-step life plan
• How to assign meaning to uncertainty and build resilience through it
• Practical strategies to take action even when the future feels unclear

If you've never felt more confused than you do now, and are unsure 'what's next', this episode is for you.    ORDER MY BOOK: https://www.psychologyofyour20s.com/general-clean  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com    The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Have you ever heard someone say they are “so OCD” for simply having a tidy house? Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder is one of the most misunderstood mental health conditions, frequently reduced to stereotypes about neatness or organisation. But for those living with OCD, the reality is far more complex - and far more invisible. In today’s episode, we go beneath the surface to explore the lived experience of OCD: the hidden compulsions, the mental spirals, and the exhausting need for certainty. We unpack the psychology behind it, challenge common misconceptions, and explore what recovery and support can actually look like. We explore:

• The role of the OCD cycle
• Why intrusive thoughts can feel so threatening
• Types of OCD beyond cleanliness and order
• Why compulsions don’t always look like rituals
• How OCD thrives on shame, secrecy, and doubt
• Approaches to treatment and the path toward healing

Whether you live with OCD, love someone who does, or just want to understand it more deeply, this episode is for you. Treat my OCD: https://www.treatmyocd.com/  Zachary: https://www.instagram.com/ocdestigmatize?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet&igsh=ZDNlZDc0MzIxNw==  Elizabeth Colbert was our researcher for this episode! Thank you Libby! 
 
Listen to my NEW PODCAST, Mantra: https://open.spotify.com/show/4Ckds0BoJDDpODInN9cWcc?si=b6ad5d555c1940e0 
 
Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg
Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast
For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com 
 
The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Over the past 6 months I've been asking people: what is the biggest mistake you made in your 20s? I've heard from over 5'000 people, some of them 21, some of them 80 and I have combined all their responses to make the ultimate list of the 20 biggest mistakes people make in their 20s, for the people, by the people.  From love, to career, to finances, going to college, friendship, taking risks: today we talk through the most common responses we received and what we can learn from these moments and regrets. Listen now!  ORDER MY BOOK: https://www.psychologyofyour20s.com/general-clean  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com    The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Why are we so obsessed with the tiny, adorable objects cluttering our desks, bags, and social media feeds? From plushies and vinyl figures to keychains and charms, trinket culture has exploded - but behind the cuteness lies something deeper. What do these seemingly insignificant objects reveal about us, our identities, and the times we’re living in? In today’s episode, we explore the psychology  of trinket culture: why we love collecting, how these objects shape our self-expression, and what they tell us about joy, nostalgia, and even economic anxiety in our twenties and beyond. We explore:

• The digital rise of trinkets through TikTok, Pinterest, and aesthetic micro-trends
• How trinkets offer identity, status, and belonging
• The role of inner child healing and nostalgia
• Why scarcity, blind boxes, and “drops” feel so addictive
• Links between trinkets, impulse spending, and economic uncertainty
• Using trinkets to spark joy

Whether you’re a proud Labubu owner or just curious about why these tiny objects hold such big meaning, this episode is for you. Listen to my NEW PODCAST, Mantra: https://open.spotify.com/show/4Ckds0BoJDDpODInN9cWcc?si=b6ad5d555c1940e0  
 
Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg
Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast
For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com 
 
The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.
 See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

"What makes someone “the one”? There is so much pressure tied into that question. Instead, it might be better to ask: how can we focus on recognising the key pillars of long-lasting, fulfilling love? In today’s episode, we explore some fundamental characteristics so you can discern whether they are “the one” for you, while also acknowledging that our soulmates are often built, rather than found. We explore:

• Unpicking the “one” narrative
• The difference between initial spark and lasting connection
• Love as a mutual, ongoing choice
• The fundamental pillars of long lasting relationships - shared values, emotional proximity, and reciprocal effort
• The role of intuition vs anxiety
• The need for authenticity and growth within a partnership

If you’re feeling the pressure to pick the ‘right’ person, or want to learn about the fundamentals of deep connection, this episode is for you.
Listen to my NEW PODCAST, Mantra: https://open.spotify.com/show/4Ckds0BoJDDpODInN9cWcc?si=b6ad5d555c1940e0 
 
Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg
Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast
For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com 
 
The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. "See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You know when someone seems to breeze through life, can approach any social situation and challenge with such self-assured confidence? It seems innate - something they were born with. But what if that's not true? What if, instead of a fixed personal trait, confidence is actually a set of learnable abilities, a dynamic skill that anyone can cultivate, sharpen, and ultimately master? Today, we’re challenging the notion that confidence is a trait, and instead something you build. Things we discuss:

• Why confidence is dynamic and adaptable
• Self-efficacy as a driver of confidence
• How "growth mindsets" can revolutionise your approach to challenges and setbacks
• Understanding the locus of control to fuel or hinder your forward momentum
• Actionable strategies to build your confidence from the ground up

  If you’ve ever thought, “if only I was just born confident”, this episode is for you.   Listen to my NEW PODCAST, Mantra: https://open.spotify.com/show/4Ckds0BoJDDpODInN9cWcc?si=b6ad5d555c1940e0    Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com    The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Does chasing your "best self" ever feel like an endless race? You're constantly striving, optimizing your routines, and learning new skills, yet sometimes a quiet exhaustion creeps in, or you wonder if you're truly any happier. It's as if the very pursuit of perfection leaves you feeling perpetually inadequate. In today's episode, we're diving into the hidden costs of this modern obsession with betterment: when personal growth can go too far.
 
Things we discuss:
•        The deep-seated desire to grow and reach our potential
•        The impact of societal pressures and the booming self-improvement industry
•        Understanding the roles of intrinsic and extrinsic motivation
•        When toxic over-striving is disguised as discipline
•        Self-improvement burnout
•        Actionable ways to cultivate sustainable growth If the non-stop quest for "more" sometimes leaves you feeling depleted, this episode is for you.  Listen to my NEW PODCAST, Mantra: https://open.spotify.com/show/4Ckds0BoJDDpODInN9cWcc?si=b6ad5d555c1940e0 ORDER MY BOOK: https://www.psychologyofyour20s.com/general-clean  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com  The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.