No Return – Details, episodes & analysis
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No Return: An Audio Drama by Kier Zhou
No Return is a darkly comic British fantasy audio drama set in a vast, doomed world of gods, mercenaries, lost cities, political disasters and very bad decisions.
Each story follows flawed people trying to survive a world that is too strange, too old, and too morally messy to make sense of. Expect ensemble chaos, dense worldbuilding, absurd humour, sudden tragedy, and fantasy with teeth.
Start here if you like: morally compromised heroes, big lore, strange comedy, full-cast fantasy, and stories where the joke and the wound are usually the same thing.
But don’t take my word for it…
This show was nominated for Best Audio Drama at the New Zealand Web Fest and officially selected for the Cisco Web Fest, which is pretty good for someone who ran out of money to apply to any more festivals!
Here’s what listeners are saying:
“A journey through a creative mind like no other… I cannot begin to imagine how this creator keeps all his characters and plot lines straight, but it’s a marvel.”
“The quality and sound production are absolutely on point, but it’s the captivating writing and voice acting that keep you coming back.”
“Chaotic [affectionate]. Each arc has something unique - sometimes gut-wrenchingly funny, sometimes grounded — it keeps you on your toes.”
Extra lore, behind-the-scenes chaos, and stray thoughts at:
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See all- https://patreon.com/NoReturnAD
233 shares
- https://patreon.com/NoReturn882
69 shares
RSS feed quality and score
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See allScore global : 63%
Publication history
Monthly episode publishing history over the past years.
4: The Black Thorn: Time to Redirect
lundi 9 mars 2026 • Duration 12:59
The Black Thorn gets a beer.
Written, performed and edited by Kier Zhou
20: Actual Play: The Fate of Daya: I'd Like That Very Much...
Season 7 · Episode 20
lundi 2 mars 2026 • Duration 01:05:16
The Orillian Regiment are leaving... The Vashjek Inaia have re-joined the Warlord's forces... and The Dayan Army is nowhere to be seen...
What do you do when you know all is lost? Do you go quietly into the night? Or will you rage against the dying of the light?
Episode Art by Jim Tuohy
Jim Tuohy Art
Gamesmaster provided by Hearthfire Tales
Want to learn more about Vash and the NoReturniverse? Why not check out The Lore of No Return
Jorvin: Cameron Gergett @Cameron_Gergett/@JasperZoink
Salryn Ilanora: Gemma Maclean-Mair
Swifty: Jack Duncan
GM: Dylan Smith
5: Wide-End: Swimming in the Endless Sea
Season 3 · Episode 5
lundi 27 octobre 2025 • Duration 32:09
If you like the show, why not become a patron on patreon, and get access to hours of bonus content!
Patreon
Anzhlo recalls his time in the camp and his run ins with Fuzhlo. Yvonna secures permission for the Saurians to stay. Brucco and Yvonna get closer. Semion takes a stroll around Wide-End
Want to learn more about Lern, Emedu and the NoReturniverse? Why not check out The Lore of No Return
Anzhlo: Matt Evans
Yvonna: Lauren Littlewood
Semion Quietknife: Dave Hodgson
Fuzhlo: Dontae Majors
Turzhlo: Drew ‘hupfva’ B
Ysenda: Gemma Maclean- Mair
Brucco: Christian Maclean-Mair
Sister Always: Glenda Vilimar
Everyone else: Kier Zhou
7: Mageslayers: Can We Get On With This Please?!
Season 5 · Episode 7
dimanche 12 octobre 2025 • Duration 34:45
The Party arrive in Terrqas to begin their side quest... but not everyone is happy with how the Reach Arc concluded.
Seilbh- Krissi Williams
Nikhol Ashorn- Cameron Gergett
Phaetra Coi- Danielle Thuen
Nanda Nall- Justin Fife
Descartamelius (Dec) Go’orbulle- Dylan Smith
Cinnte Micheart- Gemma Maclean-Mair
Shain Sotalach- Adam Robinson
Addison De Ara- Laura Duncan
Pogrim Pogglefield/Herrand/Tran- Kier Zhou
Biksune Ree- Taylor Michaels
Rebel Freeman- Alan Katsuro
3: Wide-End: Let's See What All The Fuss Is About, Shall We?
Season 3 · Episode 3
dimanche 5 octobre 2025 • Duration 39:24
If you like the show, why not become a patron on patreon, and get access to hours of bonus content!
https://patreon.com/NoReturnAD
Brucco returns to the camp and Lady Isolde attempts to befriend Anzhlo. Fuzhlo and Gnilfeit meet with Semion Quietknife.
Anzhlo- Matt Evans
Yvonna Isolde- Lauren Littlewood
Erik Isolde- Kier Zhou
Brucco- Christian McLean-Mair
Ysenda - Gemma McLean-Mair
Orryn- Kier Zhou
Abbott Liare: Lilly Inverse
Fuzhlo- Dontae Majors
Chura- Abbie Jordan-Tickle
Gnilfeit: Krissi Williams
Semion Quietknife: Dave Hodgson
Content Warning ⚠️:
- Foul language
- Peril
- Violence
- Death/Dying
- Explicit Sexual Themes
- Reference to Drug Use
1: Wide-End: Bloody Ungrateful Creatures
Season 3 · Episode 1
dimanche 28 septembre 2025 • Duration 40:59
If you like the show, why not become a patron on patreon, and get access to hours of bonus content!
Patreon
The Isoldes get a surprise visit late in the night, Brucco finds the Rain Chapel camp less than welcoming.
Want to learn more about Lern, Emedu and the NoReturniverse? Why not check out The Lore of No Return
Anzhlo- Matt Evans
Yvonna Isolde- Lauren Littlewood
Erik Isolde- Kier Zhou
Mikkel- Adam Robinson
Sir Casper - Girunduu
Brucco- Christian McLean-Mair
Ysenda - Gemma McLean-Mair
Orryn- Kier Zhou (Originally Mario Guttadauro)
Captain Ironside- James Hart
Fuzhlo- Dontae Majors
Chura- Abbie Jordan-Tickle
Gnilfeit- Krissi Williams
Elyra Lightfoot- Abbie Jordan-Tickle
Content Warning ⚠️:
- Foul language
- Peril
- Violence
- Death/Dying
- Kidnapping
- Reference to Drug Use
2: The 2teg: Are You Sure You're Not Just Really, Really, Really Ill?!
Season 10 · Episode 2
dimanche 1 juin 2025 • Duration 29:59
Wow, the 'old fashioned approach' really is much easier to follow. But... I mean... dead men showing up contrary to every rule in the book.. selective memory from the prime suspect... I'm not buying it.
Samael Vine/Rayan/Matthias Alaric/Weiguan- Kier Zhou
Lars Xu- Blake White
Scurlott Tupou- Marta Hodgson
Gnilfiet/Lucca- Krissi Williams
Leda- Lilly Inverse
Elyra Lightfoot- Abbie Jordan-Tickle
Cole Lumbo- Chris RR Bauso
Selwyn Janicek – Stasi Dimitrova ig
Niillas Janicek – Dylan Smith
Lady Isolde- Lauren Littlewood
Brother Absalom- Girunduu
Luobo Ironside- James Hart
Ang Von Overton- Rachel Pulilam
Dallen Gersia- Daniellelanois
Zafar- Christian Maclean-Mair
1: The 2teg: It's Like Dranekian Theatre!
Season 10 · Episode 1
samedi 31 mai 2025 • Duration 28:21
Thank the silent gods! We have finally dropped that insane story telling device (literally) and now we can get to the bottom of what is happening with some good old fashion interrogation!
Commander Vine/Matthias Alaric/Rayan/Saurians: Kier Zhou
Domina Elyra Lightfoot: Abbie Jordan-Tickle
Nyalie Alaric: Glenda Villimar
Constable Lucca/D'Brie: Krissi Williams
Lt Lars Xu - Blake White
Cole Lumbo P.I: Chris RR Bauso
Selwyn Janicek: Stasi Dimitrova ig
Niillas Janicek: Dylan Smith
Anzhlo: Matt Evans
Yvonna Isolde: Lauren Littlewood
Content Warning ⚠️:
- Foul language
- Peril
- Violence
- Death/Dying
- Implied Sexual Themes
3: Anderkant 2: You Truly Know Nothing!
Season 9 · Episode 3
vendredi 2 mai 2025 • Duration 43:51
Min explores the temple. The Lessee has a fiery reunion. Herrand tries to walk a tight rope. Gnilfiet drinks some soup!
Want to learn more about Anderkant, the Kabouters and the NoReturniverse? Why not check out The Lore of No Return
Gnilfeit- Krissi Williams
Thae Oraen - Gemma Maclean Mair
Everyone else- Kier Zhou
Content Warning:
- Torture
- Violence
- Lazy Crazy Oversexed Goddess Trope
Bonus Content: The Last To Leave
Season 9 · Episode 2
vendredi 2 mai 2025 • Duration 21:01
The final days of the last age were filled with sadness...but for some... cosmic calamity was new...
Across many worlds and many lands, amongst many creatures... The Fall brought many ends and many beginnings... these are the tragic words of 'One of Many', 'The Last to Leave'.
One of Many: Justin Fife
Angau: Kier Zhou









