The Poly Tantra Kink Podcast ~ Hosted by Laurie Ellington ~ Poly-Coach – Details, episodes & analysis

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The Poly Tantra Kink Podcast ~ Hosted by Laurie Ellington ~ Poly-Coach

Laurie Ellington

Health & Fitness

Society & Culture

Frequency: 1 episode/7d. Total Eps: 15

The Poly Tantra Kink Podcast explores the raw intersections of love, power, and presence. Hosted by Laurie Ellington, trauma-informed relationship and intimacy coach, each episode invites you into real conversations about polyamory, open relationships, tantra, and kink ~ where sacred meets shadow, and pleasure becomes a pathway to growth. Through candid dialogues with leading authors, educators, and practitioners, we unpack the complexities of open relating, erotic embodiment, and emotional intimacy. Whether you're poly-curious or a seasoned explorer, this podcast offers grounded tools, soulful reflections, and stories that help you live, love, and play with deeper truth. Come explore the fire where love and freedom meet.

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Episode 15: Erotic Leadership in High-Intensity Relationships with Blake Zealear

Season 1 · Episode 15

Tuesday, April 14, 2026 • Duration 01:00:58

Show Notes

In this episode of The Poly Tantra Kink Podcast, Laurie Ellington sits down with evolutionary guide Blake Zealear for a dynamic and expansive conversation on masculinity, feminism, queerness, and the future of love.

Blake shares his journey as a queer, pansexual practitioner working at the intersection of men's work, sacred sexuality, and non-traditional relationship design. Together, he and Laurie explore what it means to move beyond rigid identity boxes and into relational sovereignty.

They discuss shadow work, polarity, new-paradigm masculinity, and how healing our personal wounds contributes to cultural evolution. Blake speaks to the necessity of integrating feminism into men's work, dismantling shame around desire, and cultivating embodied leadership rooted in integrity rather than dominance.

This episode is an invitation to transmute suffering into power, reclaim erotic aliveness, and participate consciously in the emergence of a new culture of love.

Episode Highlights

Two-spirit and queer perspectives in men's work
Integrating feminism into masculinity work
Sacred sexuality beyond labels
Shadow work and relational sovereignty
Non-traditional relationship design
Polarity and embodied leadership
Transmuting shame into power
Evolving love beyond old paradigms

About Blake Zealear

Blake Zealear is an evolutionary guide working at the intersection of men's work, feminism, sacred sexuality, and new-paradigm relating. Identifying as two-spirit, queer, and pansexual, Blake brings a multi-faceted perspective to his teaching that invites empowerment, permission, and playfulness.

His multidisciplinary background includes embodiment, NLP, Radical Honesty, Landmark technology, tantric and yogic practices, breathwork, shamanic sexuality, shadow work, polarity work, and Spiral Dynamics. Blake is devoted to the emergence of a new culture of love and the healing of our relationships to ourselves, one another, and the Earth.

Links & Resources Mentioned

Website: https://blakezealear.com/
Men's work and new-paradigm relating programs

Connect with Laurie Ellington

Website: poly-coach.com
Instagram: @polycoaching

Work with Laurie:
Explore coaching for polyamory, open relationships, tantra, sacred sexuality, and conscious kink.

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Episode 14: Embodied Legacy: Living What You Teach with Laurie Handlers

Season 1 · Episode 14

Tuesday, April 7, 2026 • Duration 41:21

Show Notes

In this episode of The Poly Tantra Kink Podcast, Laurie Ellington sits down with sacred sexuality pioneer Laurie Handlers for a candid, powerful conversation about embodied legacy, erotic vitality, and living what you teach.

With over four decades of experience guiding people through sexuality, shame, and consciousness work, Laurie reflects on her early curiosity about the body, her first encounters with tantra in the 1990s, and the radical life transformation that followed. What began as a personal search became a lifelong devotion to embodiment, emotional release, and ecstatic living.

Together, they explore what it truly means to hold power responsibly as a facilitator, why integrity and repair matter in community spaces, and how living in alignment creates a natural legacy. Laurie shares how sexual energy is creative life force, why emotional release is foundational, and how tantra is both spiritual practice and chemistry.

The conversation also touches on aging, menopause, biohacking, erotic renaissance, and the myth of "happily ever after." Laurie reminds listeners that walking this path will disrupt your life, and that once body, mind, and spirit are integrated, you cannot unsee that truth.

Episode Highlights

Discovering tantra and transforming an entire life
Embodied legacy as living your truth consistently
Why facilitators must live what they teach
Repair, accountability, and community healing
Sexual energy as creative life force
Emotional release as a non-negotiable foundation
Ecstasy as daily practice, not peak performance
Aging, menopause, and erotic renaissance
The myth of happily ever after
"I come with a surgeon general's warning. I will disrupt your life."

About Laurie Handlers

Laurie Handlers, MA, is an international speaker, bestselling author, and world-renowned teacher of sacred sexuality. For more than 40 years, she has guided people to release sexual shame, reclaim pleasure, and live in embodied truth.

Links & Resources Mentioned Connect with Laurie Ellington

Episode 5: Play Party Prep & Integration: Jedi Skills for Navigating Group Social Sexual Spaces with Reid Mihalko

Season 1 · Episode 5

Tuesday, February 3, 2026 • Duration 01:08:04

Show Notes

In this episode of The Poly Tantra Kink Podcast, Laurie talks with sex educator and consent pioneer Reid Mihalko about navigating group social sexual spaces with more confidence and care. They explore how to prepare for play parties and retreats, understand different party cultures, and have clearer safer sex conversations.

Reid shares practical tools for staying grounded, finding the right community for your nervous system, and using humor and consent to create connection instead of pressure. This episode is for anyone curious about or already exploring group erotic spaces.

Episode Highlights

Preparing for play parties and group spaces
Understanding different play party cultures
Consent practices and welcome circles
Safer sex conversations that build trust
Staying grounded in high-energy environments
Humor as a tool for easing awkwardness
Aftercare and integration after events
The Embrace the Awkward approach to initiation

About Reid Mihalko

As seen on NETFLIX' "Chelsea Does..." alongside Chelsea Handler, Reid Mihalko (he/him) of ReidAboutSex.com is an internationally known sex and relationship geek who threw an orgy for Oprah's OWN Network on Lisa Ling's "Our America." He has led thousands of workshops and play parties, and his work has been covered by media outlets across 7 continents. His charisma and easy to understand, pragmatic advice has helped people at virtual and in-person events. His workshops and college lectures have been attended by over 60,000 people from across the globe.

Reid would also like you to know that, in early 2018, some very brave people came forward during #MeToo sharing harms that Reid had caused them. Reid stepped down from teaching and initiated a transformative justice-based accountability process to address his misconduct and make amends if and where possible. The formal, year-long process along with Reid's apology and resources were shared publicly and can be found at TinyURL.com/reidaccountability.

Links & Resources Mentioned Connect with Laurie Ellington

Episode 4: Presence Is the Practice: Tantra as a Way of Being in Modern Relationships with Shawn Roop

Season 1 · Episode 4

Tuesday, January 27, 2026 • Duration 49:06

Show Notes

In this episode of The Poly Tantra Kink Podcast, Laurie Ellington sits down with modern tantra teacher Shawn Roop, founder of Tantra Quest, for a grounded and expansive conversation on presence as a lived practice, and not a performance.

Shawn shares his unconventional path into tantra and how his work, rooted in Mahamudra Tantra, focuses on removing what's in the way rather than adding more techniques. Together, they explore why pleasure is impossible without presence, how maturity creates safety in open and non-traditional relationships, and why designing relationships from inner truth matters more than following external blueprints.

This episode is an invitation to slow down, return to the body's intelligence, and let presence guide intimacy, sexuality, and relationship choice.

Episode Highlights

Tantra as something you remember, not something you learn
Presence as the foundation of pleasure and intimacy
Removing obstacles instead of adding techniques
Maturity vs. "safety" in open and polyamorous relationships
Designing relationships from inner truth
Embodiment as awareness, feeling, and action
Why pacing and sobriety of mind create sustainability

About Shawn Roop

Shawn Roop is the founder of Tantra Quest and a modern tantra teacher with over 25 years of embodied experience. Rooted in Mahamudra Tantra, his work is direct, grounded, and practical, supporting people in reconnecting with the intelligence of their body, energy, and awareness.

Shawn works with individuals, couples, and teachers through classes, private sessions, and immersive programs. His teaching emphasizes presence over performance, empowerment over dependency, and removing what's in the way so people can access their own inner wisdom and live more truth-aligned lives.

Links & Resources Mentioned

Tantra Quest: https://tantraquest.com/

Connect with Laurie Ellington

Episode 3: The Wheel of Consent & Erotic Integrity with Dr. Betty Martin

Season 1 · Episode 3

Tuesday, January 20, 2026 • Duration 45:24

Show Notes

In this episode of The Poly Tantra Kink Podcast, Laurie speaks with Dr. Betty Martin, creator of the Wheel of Consent and founder of the School of Consent, about what it truly means to practice consent with clarity, presence, and integrity.

Dr. Martin shares the origin of the Wheel of Consent and the Three Minute Game, offering a grounded framework for understanding desire, choice, and responsibility. Together, they explore the difference between consent and permission, why receiving can be more challenging than giving, and how learning who an interaction is for can transform sex, relationships, kink, tantra, and everyday life.

This episode is a foundational conversation for anyone wanting to relate more honestly to desire, boundaries, and embodied truth.

Episode Highlights

The origin story of the Wheel of Consent
The Three Minute Game and why it is more than a simple exercise
Why consent and permission are not the same thing
Learning to recognize who an interaction is actually for
Why receiving can be harder than giving
Asking for what you want as a vulnerable and essential skill
Erotic integrity as telling the truth about desire
Applications of the Wheel of Consent beyond sexuality, including business and social systems
Why slowing down and tracking sensation creates depth and presence

About Dr. Betty Martin

Dr. Betty Martin has worked hands-on with people professionally for over 40 years. Her background includes 30 years as a chiropractor and practitioner of other body-based modalities, followed by 15 years as a somatic sex educator and surrogate partner therapist. Her work is also informed by Contact Improvisation and embodied play practices.

She is the developer of the Wheel of Consent, a groundbreaking model of receiving and giving that began with touch and now extends far beyond it into relationships, leadership, sexuality, and everyday life. Dr. Martin is the author of The Art of Receiving and Giving: The Wheel of Consent.

Links & Resources Mentioned Connect with Laurie Ellington

Episode 2: Attachment, the Nervous System & Healing Childhood Wounds With Dr. Stacy Ellis

Season 1 · Episode 2

Monday, January 19, 2026 • Duration 45:56

Show Notes

In this episode of The Poly Tantra Kink Podcast, Laurie Ellington sits down with psychologist and somatic practitioner Dr. Stacy Ellis for a rich conversation about trauma, embodiment, nervous system regulation, and what it takes to create real, lasting change.

Together, they explore how healing happens beyond talk therapy, why working with the body is essential for transformation, and how alternative relationship structures, sexuality, and conscious practices intersect with trauma-informed care. Dr. Ellis shares insights from her clinical work, group facilitation, and immersive workshops that help people move out of old patterns and into embodied presence.

This episode is an invitation to slow down, reconnect with the body, and approach healing as an integrated, whole-person experience.

Episode Highlights

Why embodiment is essential for trauma healing
Moving beyond talk therapy into somatic change
Nervous system regulation and childhood conditioning
Integrating psychology with body-based practices
Supporting authentic expression and relational health
Creating sustainable change through immersive work
Healing as a present-moment, embodied process

About Dr. Stacy Ellis

Dr. Stacy Ellis is a Doctor of Psychology, somatic practitioner, and international facilitator devoted to supporting deep personal transformation. With over fifteen years of clinical experience and a decade of leading ongoing groups, her work weaves together psychology, nervous system regulation, and embodied practices.

Dr. Ellis is trauma-informed and trained in modalities including EMDR, IFS, TRE, EFT, NLP, somatic therapies, breathwork, and sound healing. She specializes in trauma, inner child work, LGBTQIA+ care, addiction medicine, alternative relationship styles, and cultivating a healthy nervous system. Her workshops and immersive experiences support people in moving out of old conditioning and into authentic, embodied living.

Links & Resources Mentioned Connect with Laurie Ellington

Episode 1: Why We Play With Fire | Laurie Ellington

Season 1 · Episode 1

Sunday, January 4, 2026 • Duration 18:51

Show Notes

In this opening episode of The Poly Tantra Kink Podcast, Laurie invites you into a raw and embodied exploration of why we are drawn to the edges of love, desire, and power. Through her personal journey with polyamory, tantra, conscious kink, plant medicine, and nervous system wisdom, she reflects on how "playing with fire" becomes a path of truth, liberation, and deep self-return.

Laurie shares how years in ethical non-monogamy, periods of intentional solitude, and immersive experiences in tantra, BDSM, and ceremony shaped her relationship to intimacy, safety, and surrender. This episode sets the foundation for the season, opening a conversation about sacred sexuality, conscious relationships, and learning to meet intensity with presence rather than control.

Episode Highlights

Why desire often leads us to the edges of growth
Fire as a metaphor for truth, transformation, and intimacy
Lessons from ethical non-monogamy and conscious uncoupling
Tantra and kink as practices of presence and nervous system safety
Learning to surrender without losing yourself
Integration as the bridge between insight and embodied change

About Laurie Ellington

Laurie Ellington is a trauma-informed poly coach, intimacy guide, and educator devoted to conscious relating, sacred sexuality, and embodied transformation. With over a decade of experience in polyamory, tantra, and kink-aware coaching, her work supports people in navigating desire, attachment, power, and nervous system regulation with honesty and care.

Laurie's approach weaves together somatic awareness, relational skills, and spiritual inquiry to help clients meet intensity without bypassing, suppressing, or self-abandoning. She works with individuals and couples exploring ethical non-monogamy, open relationships, tantra, and conscious kink, offering a grounded path toward deeper trust, freedom, and connection.

Connect with Laurie Ellington

Website: https://poly-coach.com Instagram: @polycoaching

Episode 13: Building Collective Care That Actually Works with Kitty Stryker

Season 1 · Episode 13

Tuesday, March 31, 2026 • Duration 52:41

Show Notes

In this episode of The Poly Tantra Kink Podcast, Laurie Ellington sits down with sex educator, activist, and author Kitty Stryker for a powerful conversation about consent culture, accountability, and building collective care that is actually sustainable.

Kitty shares how her early activism shaped her worldview and how repeated burnout led her to rethink what community truly means. Together, Laurie and Kitty explore how consent culture extends far beyond sexual spaces into workplaces, organizing spaces, polyamory, and everyday power dynamics.

They discuss why saying no is an act of trust, how to hold conflict without collapsing into punishment or exile, and why accountability must include pathways for repair. Kitty also introduces the concept of scrupulosity, a compulsive drive to prove moral righteousness, and how recognizing it can reduce anxiety and create more grounded activism.

This episode invites listeners to reconsider individualism, redefine community as mutual investment, and build systems that honor capacity, consent, and shared responsibility.

Episode Highlights

From childhood activism to consent culture work
Burnout and choosing sustainable lanes of impact
Consent culture beyond sex and kink
Reframing no as an affirmation of autonomy
Collective care as self-care
Healthy conflict vs. conflict avoidance
Accountability without exile or endless punishment
Scrupulosity and anxiety-driven righteousness
Redefining community as shared investment and mutual responsibility

About Kitty Stryker

Kitty Stryker has been working to define and build consent culture for over a decade. Based in Berkeley, CA, she focuses on bringing conversations about consent, critical thinking, disability justice, and sustainable activism into everyday life.

She is the author of Ask Yourself: The Consent Culture Workbook and Love Rebels: How I Learned to Burn It Down Without Burning Out, published by Thornapple Press. Kitty is an anarchist street medic, community organizer, and long-time advocate for trauma-aware accountability practices.

Links & Resources Mentioned Connect with Laurie Ellington

Episode 12: Queer Tantra & Erotic Inclusivity with Barbara Carrellas

Season 1 · Episode 12

Tuesday, March 24, 2026 • Duration 45:30

Show Notes

In this episode of The Poly Tantra Kink Podcast, Laurie Ellington sits down with tantra pioneer and Urban Tantra founder Barbara Carrellas for a powerful conversation on queer tantra, erotic inclusivity, and ecstatic possibility.

Barbara shares how her work was born during the AIDS crisis in New York City alongside Annie Sprinkle and Joseph Kramer, and how that moment shaped her lifelong commitment to inclusive erotic spirituality. Together, Laurie and Barbara explore what it means to create brave spaces for all bodies, genders, orientations, and abilities, and how curiosity is the foundation of authentic connection.

They discuss breath and energy orgasms, the orgasm spectrum, leadership and power dynamics in teaching, the intersection of safety and risk, and why joy and humor are gateways to spirit. Barbara also shares insights from her upcoming book, The Book of Ecstasy, and offers listeners access to her guided breath and energy orgasm practice.

This episode is a reminder that ecstasy is available to anybody with breath and a beating heart, and that desire can be sacred without being sanitized.

Episode Highlights

The origins of Urban Tantra during the AIDS crisis
Classical tantra vs. contemporary neo-tantra
Queer as curiosity and invitation
Creating brave spaces through agreements and consent
The "Oops/Ouch" and WAIT leadership principles
The orgasm spectrum beyond genital release
Breath and energy orgasms as accessible ecstatic practice
Why ecstasy lives at the intersection of safety and risk
Values, needs, and desire in polyamorous relationships

About Barbara Carrellas

Barbara Carrellas is the author of the first LGBTQ+-inclusive tantric sex guide, Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the Twenty First Century. She has also written Ecstasy is Necessary and Luxurious Loving.

Barbara is the founder of Urban Tantra®, an all-gender, all-sexual-preferences-welcome approach to sacred sexuality that blends practices from Tantra to BDSM. She has been named Best Tantric Sex Seminar Leader in New York City by Time Out/NY and received a Lifetime Achievement Award at the Sexual Freedom Awards in London.

Links & Resources Mentioned Connect with Laurie Ellington

Episode 11: Erotic Polarity, Containment & the Power of Eros with Om Rupani

Season 1 · Episode 11

Tuesday, March 17, 2026 • Duration 51:16

Show Notes

In this episode of The Poly Tantra Kink Podcast, Laurie Ellington sits down with educator and writer Om Rupani for a provocative and unfiltered conversation about erotic polarity, power dynamics, and the true nature of eros in modern relationships.

Together, they explore how desire, dominance, submission, and containment function beyond ideology and polite conversation. Om challenges common narratives around feminism, empowerment, and modern man–woman relating, offering a perspective rooted in what he has observed actually works in real bodies and real relationships.

This conversation dives into the transformative potential of BDSM and tantric containers when approached with integrity, humility, and responsibility. Laurie and Om discuss why eros cannot be used as a bargaining chip, how catharsis and healing can emerge through properly held erotic experiences, and what both men and women must reclaim to restore sustainable polarity and intimacy.

Episode Highlights

Erotic polarity and the nature of eros
Power, dominance, and submission beyond performance
Why eros cannot be used as a means to an end
Containment and responsibility in BDSM and tantra
Catharsis, trauma release, and erotic healing
Modern masculinity, femininity, and relational exhaustion
Why respect and polarity are essential for desire
Letting go of agendas to allow transformation

About Om Rupani

Om Rupani is an educator and writer specializing in eros, power dynamics, and man–woman relating. He teaches internationally on intimacy, BDSM, and polarity, and is known for his direct, provocative approach to subjects many people avoid.

Om's work focuses on how desire, dominance, receptivity, and erotic integrity actually function in lived relationships. His teachings invite people to move beyond ideology and surface-level empowerment into deeper responsibility, embodiment, and truth within erotic and relational dynamics.

Links & Resources Mentioned Connect with Laurie Ellington

The Poly Tantra Kink Podcast ~ Hosted by Laurie Ellington ~ Poly-Coach – Details, episodes & analysis

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