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Explore every episode of the podcast Your Parenting Long Game

Dive into the complete episode list for Your Parenting Long Game. Each episode is cataloged with detailed descriptions, making it easy to find and explore specific topics. Keep track of all episodes from your favorite podcast and never miss a moment of insightful content.

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1–50 of 100

TitlePub. DateDuration
Episode 332: When Children Resist Doing Hard Things: When to Push (and When Not To)16 Jan 202500:14:29

https://rachel-bailey.com/332https://rachel-bailey.com/332Show Notes:

When we are raising children with big emotions, it can be frustrating watching them struggle when things don’t come easily. Even when we encourage them and remind them that they can do hard things, they may continue to complain or resist, leaving us wondering: Should we push them, or should we give in? Fortunately, there is a simple way to make this decision… and a way to help them handle discomfort when a push is appropriate. 

In this episode, you’ll learn: 

  • Why children with big emotions often avoid doing hard things

  • How to decide when to push them do hard things and when it doesn’t make sense to push 

  • How we can help deal with their discomfort so they can become the best version of themselves

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Free live "Power Hour" event

Free resource: Summary of Episode 332

Join Rachel’s Facebook group

The Leadership Parenting Academy and Success Lab

Episode 331: When Your Child Is Hard on Themselves When They Make a Mistake (Why Saying “It’s OK” Doesn’t Help)09 Jan 202500:20:02

Show Notes:

While some kids with big emotions blame others, others are incredibly hard on themselves. And it can be devastating to hear them beat themselves up when they make a mistake! Often when they do, our instinct is to tell them it will be okay, that it’s not a big deal, that everyone makes mistakes. But as you’ve probably noticed, that doesn’t make them stop this behavior in the long run, and it can even make them feel worse in the moment. The good news is that we can use Leadership Parenting strategies to help our children – and ourselves! – handle these situations more effectively. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why previous attempts to help our kids calm down haven’t worked -- and often make things worse instead

  • Qualities that many children with big emotions have in common (and why it feels like they regularly get stuck in cycles of negativity)

  • How to stay regulated and help kids get unstuck so they can learn how to handle their mistakes in the moment… and build resilience for the future

--

Free live "Power Hour" event

Free resource: Summary of Episode 331

Join Rachel’s Facebook group

The Leadership Parenting Academy and Success Lab

Episode 324: Why Motivators Work Better Than Punishments for Kids With Big Emotions19 Sep 202400:19:53

Often when we ask our kids with big emotions to do things they have to do, instead of doing what we ask, they resist, negotiate, or even become disrespectful to us (or themselves!). And when we feel helpless and stuck, we often then fall back on strategies that our parents used with us… which tends to make things worse. So how can we motivate responsible and respectful behavior when our attempts seem to just lead to more drama? 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Two reasons why rewards and punishments don’t work for kids with big emotions

  • Common reasons why children struggle (and how we can identify these reasons when our kids are having a hard time)

  • How to go beneath kids’ behavior to motivate more positive behaviors, moods, and attitudes with less resistance 

 

Episode 323: When Children Melt Down When Things Don’t Go Their Way05 Sep 202400:17:04

One of the defining qualities of children with "big emotions" is that they have a hard time when things don't go their way. But explaining to them why they need to be more flexible doesn't seem to work, and it only frustrates them and us more! The good news is that we can help our children handle frustration and disappointment when we shift from telling children WHY they need to be more flexible to teaching them HOW to be more flexible.

In this episode, you'll learn:

  • Why we reduce our influence when we try to get children to accept that things won't always go their way
  • What they truly need in order to become more adaptable
  • A simple formula (with examples!) to teach them to maturely handle the fact that things will go differently than they expected -- even if they are currently resistant to talk about this

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Transcript of this episode: https://rachel-bailey.com/323-transcript/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/

Episode 322: How to Validate Your Child’s Feelings Without Condoning Their Behavior29 Aug 202400:14:04

We want our children to feel respected, and we know that it’s important to connect with them and validate their feelings. But when they’ve behaved in an unacceptable way, it’s easy to wonder if, when you’re connecting with them, you’re letting them “get away” with negative behavior. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why our influence does depend on being able to balance both validation and firmness

  • A simple formula (with examples!) to show our kids that we sincerely care about what they’re going through without condoning negative behavior 

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Summary of this episode with examples: 

https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/199

Transcript of this episode: https://rachel-bailey.com/322-transcript/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/

Episode 321: Supporting Children Who Struggle With Change: Starting a New School Year & Beyond15 Aug 202400:16:02

Changes and new situations – especially a new school year! – can create a lot of worry for our kids with big emotions. But no matter what the change is, or what their worries are, we can empower children to handle hard things. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Simple steps to help kids get ready for a new school year (or any other situation that they’re nervous about)

  • How to make it less likely that they’ll worry about changes and transitions 

  • How to help them feel more in control of situations that they are anxious about

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Summary of this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/198

Transcript of this episode: https://rachel-bailey.com/321-transcript/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/rachel

Episode 320: Have a Child Who Acts Spoiled or Entitled? Here’s What’s Really Going On01 Aug 202400:14:54

Many children with big emotions can seem spoiled or entitled at times -- like they expect to get everything they want, all of the time. And even though it can be tempting to give in for the sake of family peace, there are better ways to help our children in these situations… so they can learn how to handle not getting their way in the future. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why kids with big emotions seem to always want more, more, more

  • What we can ask ourselves to know if we’re giving our children what they truly need (or just want they want)

  • One thing all parents can give their kids so they don’t keep asking for more

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Summary of this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/197

Transcript of this episode: https://rachel-bailey.com/320-transcript/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/rachel

Episode 319: Influencing Your Child To Be More Open to Feedback and Talking About Emotions25 Jul 202400:15:18

Despite the fact that they experience emotions very intensely, it’s very common for children who feel strongly to NOT want to talk about their emotions. But in order to address negative behavior, moods, and attitudes, we need to have these conversations!

The good news is that using specific phrases will allow us to improve our influence with our children so they are open to hearing us, rather than trying to avoid us. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • The real reasons why our children tend to avoid talking about their emotions

  • How to start conversations with our kids (without triggering their resistance)

  • How we can help our kids handle their discomfort more effectively and maturely 

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Summary of this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/196

Transcript of this episode: https://rachel-bailey.com/319-transcript/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/rachel

Episode 318: Teaching HOW: A Key Component of Fostering Resilience11 Jul 202400:13:59

We ask our children to do things all the time, and (of course) we assume that they know how to do what we ask. Why wouldn’t they? In reality, a lot of negative behavior stems from skills that children are missing – which means they actually don’t know how to do what we ask. In order to improve our influence and their resilience, all we need to do is teach them a few strategies for success. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • What actually stops children from doing what we want them to do 

  • How one simple shift can decrease our frustration and our exhaustion

  • What it’s like to be a child who wants to do better… but can’t 

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Summary of this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/195

Transcript of this episode: https://rachel-bailey.com/318-transcript/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/rachel

Episode 317: When You Want Your Child to Change More Quickly04 Jul 202400:13:55

It can be exhausting to parent children with big emotions -- especially when it feels like our efforts to improve behavior, moods, and attitudes take longer than we would like. Even if we understand (in our minds) that it takes time for our kids to learn how to deal with their discomfort and develop new skills, that doesn’t always make us stop wishing they would feel and act better more quickly! 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why wanting things to go more quickly actually slows things down 

  • One question we can ask ourselves to change our perspective and our attitude (so progress does happen faster) 

  • The key to less frustration if children do take time to change 

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Summary of this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/194

Transcript of this episode: https://rachel-bailey.com/317-transcript/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/rachel

Episode 316: Trouble Getting Your Child Off of Screens? Here's What It May Be Like For Them27 Jun 202400:12:54

One of the most common reasons for big emotions in our homes is related to asking our children to get off of their devices. And let's be real: They DO have to learn to get off of their devices without acting like it's the end of the world!

But most of the time, we attempt to make this happen makes things worse, not better. When we get into our children’s world, we can often understand why our attempts aren’t effective – and what we can do instead. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • What it’s like from a child’s perspective to have to get off of screens

  • Why his parents’ (very logical) attempts to address his behavior don’t work 

  • How getting into your child’s shoes can help bring peace to your home 

 

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Transcript of this episode: https://rachel-bailey.com/316-transcript/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/rachel

 

Episode 315: How to Handle Screens in the Summer With Children With Big Emotions20 Jun 202400:16:29

This time of year, navigating the use of screens can be a real challenge -- especially when you’re raising children with big emotions.

The summer can start off feeling more relaxed, but then come the power struggles over how long children can be on screens and the meltdowns when they have to get off of their devices.

Fortunately, a few simple changes can reduce the drama, even during those times when children are even more likely to turn to screens as entertainment. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why kids with big emotions struggle with screen time limits

  • How to increase your influence to reduce screen time drama 

  • How to give your kids the skills THEY need to get off of screens more easily (helping them deal with transitions and boredom!)

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FREE 1:1 CONVERSATION: Want to talk to Rachel about what's causing YOUR screen time drama? 
Send an email to info@Rachel-Bailey.com with the word "Screens" in the subject line! 

Free summary of this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/193

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/rachel

Episode 330: Using Leadership Parenting Strategies so That Emotions and Reactions No Longer Control Your Home06 Jan 202500:17:21

Most parents who are raising kids with big emotions would say that our kids’ reactions – their reactions when they don’t get their way, or when they have to do something they don’t want to do, etc. – tend to be very big and very difficult to manage. Often, we feel like their reactions control our homes because they impact our daily routines, our other children, and even the decisions we make. But it is possible to regain control of your home so that it doesn’t seem like those emotions or reactions are in charge! Specific step-by-step strategies, called Leadership Parenting strategies, can help you make that happen.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • What Leadership Parenting strategies are and why they’re so powerful 

  • Two actionable leadership parenting strategies that allow us and our children to respect emotions without being controlled by them

  • Benefits of using leadership parenting strategies with our kids

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FREE RESOURCE: Leadership Parenting Strategies

Join Rachel’s Facebook group

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions

Learn more about the Leadership Parenting Academy and Leadership Parenting Success Lab

Episode 314: Plug An “Influence Leak”: Stop Trying to Get Your Child to See Why What They’re Doing is Wrong13 Jun 202400:19:01

Of course we want our children to listen to us when we ask them to do what they’re supposed to do or when we ask them to act maturely in situations that don’t go their way. 

But often when we try to get our kids to listen to us, we do it in ways that actually decrease our influence. This is especially true when we try to get our children to see why we are right and they are wrong. 

Of course it’s not that we shouldn’t try to motivate better behavior! Rather, we can just do it in more effective ways. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why telling children what they’ve done wrong doesn’t lead to them doing what’s right

  • Exactly how to approach your child to increase your influence 

  • Why this non-permissive strategy not only increases your influence, but strengthens your relationship

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FREE ASSESSMENT + 30-MINUTE CALL WITH RACHEL: https://rachel-bailey.com/call

Free summary of this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/192

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/rachel

Episode 313: Plugging an “Influence Leak” - Lack of Predictability06 Jun 202400:16:17

As parents, we want to be able to influence our children. And we can feel helpless and out of control when we try to help our kids feel or act better… and we can’t make it happen. 

One of the most common ways that we “leak” influence happens on a day-to-day basis in the way we ask our kids to do things and in the way we respond to their requests.

Once you become aware of this leak, you can make a simple change and increase your influence immediately! 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why some of our our requests and our responses immediately put our kids into fight-or-flight (and make them more resistant to us) 

  • An example that illustrates what this is like for your child that you will be able to relate to

  • Simple strategies to increase your influence and improve your relationship with your child 

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FREE ASSESSMENT + 30-MINUTE CALL WITH RACHEL: https://rachel-bailey.com/call

Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/191

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/rachel

Episode 312: Plugging an “Influence Leak” - Recognizing Your Expectations23 May 202400:15:15

As parents, we want to be able to motivate our kids to act more responsible and handle situations more effectively. And we can feel helpless and out of control when we aren’t able to make that happen.

Unfortunately, we will feel helpless and out of control because we often (unknowingly) “leak” influence by the way we think about and respond to situations. One of the most common influence leaks happens when we set unrealistic expectations and aren't even aware that we're doing that. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • How setting realistic expectations increases our influence with our children

  • A simple question that will help you set expectations and handle previously-difficult situations more effectively 

  • The benefits (for us and our kids!) when we plug influence leaks 

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FREE ASSESSMENT + 30-MINUTE CALL WITH RACHEL: https://rachel-bailey.com/call

Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/190

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/rachel

Episode 311: A Simplified Roadmap to Peace, Resilience, and Confidence (Step 2 of 2)16 May 202400:19:47

We want to be able to influence our kids. We want them to listen to us, and we want to be able to calm them down so they can work through situations with less drama. So it can be challenging when our attempts to influence them don't work… or even make things worse! In this second episode of a two-part series, we’ll discuss what's needed to become a powerful positive influence with your children so you can bring more peace to your home, even if that seems impossible now. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • The type of influence we usually have with our children – and why it doesn’t motivate better behavior, moods, and attitudes

  • The two qualities that you need if you want your children to listen more readily and calm down more easily 

  • What it looks like when you do improve your influence (even if your children don’t realize it’s happened) 

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FREE ASSESSMENT + 30-MINUTE CALL WITH RACHEL: https://rachel-bailey.com/call

Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/189

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/rachel

Episode 310: A Simplified Roadmap to Peace, Resilience, and Confidence (Step 1 of 2)09 May 202400:16:15

Most of us crave more calm in our homes. But what do we do when there is drama on an almost-daily basis and nothing we try makes a difference in our child’s behavior? Is it possible to reduce the drama and feel more confident in our parenting without damaging our relationship with our children? The good news is you can bring more peace to your family while increasing your children’s resilience and self-esteem. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why our current parenting strategies don’t change behavior, moods, or attitudes

  • The differences between Band Aid Parenting and Long Game Parenting

  • What our kids really need from us when they’re struggling (and the long-term benefits of meeting their needs rather than addressing negative behavior with punishments and rewards)

Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/188

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/

 

Episode 309: Using Yuck Dumps for Kids to Improve Behaviors, Moods, Attitudes25 Apr 202400:16:57

It’s natural to want our kids’ negative behaviors, moods, and behaviors to stop. But what happens when nothing we do seems to end the drama? How can we break out of the cycles of negativity? 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why “quick fix” methods don’t help our kids feel better (and often make things worse)

  • Why Yuck Dumps are NOT the same as wallowing, and how these Dumps actually build resilience 

  • Simple ways to help children release their negativity and frustration

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Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/187

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/

Live "make your plan" sessions: https://rachel-bailey.com/training/

Episode 308: How to Stop Using Willpower to Try to Stay Calm (When You’re Actually Upset With Your Kids)11 Apr 202400:16:40

We know it’s better to stay calm when our children have big feelings, but it seems like some days, we can only hold on for so long when they are complaining, crying, or melting down. How can we help our kids handle their discomfort when their behavior triggers our own Yuck?

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why we need to set realistic expectations for our children

  • What it looks like when we’re using willpower to stay calm (and why willpower never seems to last long enough)

  • How to shift from artificial calm to genuine emotional regulation 

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Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/186

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/

"Make Your Long Game Plan" live sessions: https://rachel-bailey.com/training/

Episode 307: Why You’re Not A Failure (What’s Really Going On Instead)04 Apr 202400:13:13

Most of us have an idea of how we'd like to interact with our kids. But often when we're tired or frustrated, we don't react in a way that feels good. And when situations with our kids frequently spiral out of control, it’s natural to feel like we are failing at parenting! 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Tips that will help any time you feel like a failure

  • One mindset shift that can reduce guilt immediately

  • How simple steps we take can positively impact our kids

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Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/185

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/

Episode 306: When Your Child Gets Upset When Others Are Upset28 Mar 202400:13:41

We talk a lot about BIG reactions when our kids have big feelings, but what about quiet, sensitive children who struggle when other people around them are upset? Often these children will do anything they can in order to make others feel better. To keep the peace, they will also disregard their own needs – even when we encourage them to stand up for themselves! 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why many parenting strategies don’t work with our sensitive children (and may even make things worse)

  • How to help our kids deal with discomfort -- without hurting their self-esteem

  • How we can help "sensitive" children become confident, resilient kids who know how to advocate for themselves in difficult situations

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Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/184

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/

Episode 305: You'll Lose Your Cool Less Often When You Do This21 Mar 202400:13:34

When we’re raising kids with big feelings, it can be hard to stay emotionally regulated all of the time. How can we be the parent we want to be when it’s hard not to lose our cool? How can we teach our kids how to stay calm when we’re struggling with staying calm ourselves?

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why we get stuck in a “cycle of Yuck” (and feel guilty and ashamed)

  • How your ability to regulate yourself impacts your influence with your child 

  • A simple tool you can use in the moment to get unstuck - even when your children are complaining or melting down 

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Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/183

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/

Bonus Episode 2: A Plan for Holiday Success (Focusing on Kids’ Behaviors)12 Dec 202400:11:22

Having a joyful and connected holiday season can be challenging when we are raising kids with big emotions. We are so busy and our children are overstimulated, full of sugar and out of their regular routines. If we aren’t proactive, we can become overwhelmed, exhausted, and resentful. The good news is, a simple process (that just takes a few minutes) can reduce holiday Yuck and increase our parenting influence, giving us more energy to enjoy the season. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • How to work with our children to solve problems, rather than working against them

  • A simple process that addresses our kids’ negative behavior, moods, and attitudes in the moment 

  • How to use this same process to teach them the skills they need for the next time they have big feelings

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FREE RESOURCE: Work WITH your child using the 4Ps

Join Rachel’s Facebook group

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions

Episode 304: When Family Members Get Caught In Negative Cycles07 Mar 202400:13:36

We want our days to be filled with peace and connection, but those of us raising kids with big emotions know that’s not always the reality. Even when we try hard to fix the arguing, complaining, and general resistance to our requests, it can feel like nothing reduces the drama long-term -- and sometimes, it seems like our efforts are actually making things worse.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why some of your current parenting strategies may not be working, despite your best efforts

  • The real reasons behind seemingly-unbreakable cycles -- and what to do about it!

  • The lifelong benefits (for us and our kids) of breaking negative cycles for good

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Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/182

Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Episode 303: A Strategy to Decode Children’s Confusing Reactions29 Feb 202400:14:50

It can be overwhelming navigating the constantly-changing emotions and reactions of children who feel things strongly. One minute they’re happy and the next, they are melting down about something that’s not even a big deal! We want to reduce the drama and be a powerful positive influence with our kids, but how do we do that when we don’t really understand what’s driving their reactions?

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • What to check first when kids have unpredictable behavior

  • How to “see” inside our children’s brains, so we can approach them with compassion instead of judgment 

  • The benefits of changing our perspective when kids have confusing reactions

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Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/181

Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Episode 302: Micro-Deposits: Strengthen Your Relationship & Influence, Even If Your Child Is Resistant22 Feb 202400:16:04

Even when you try to make deposits with your children, sometimes you run into obstacles. You may feel particularly stuck if your child resists the attempts you are trying to make to connect with them! When that happens, using micro-deposits can help you get unstuck and shift things back to a more positive direction. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • How to address common obstacles to making deposits 

  • Why children with big emotions pull away or push back when we’re trying to spend time with them

  • Easy-to-implement “micro” deposits -- simple actions that don’t take much time but have a BIG impact on your relationship

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Talk to Rachel about whether the "Become a Powerful Positve Influence" Action Program is a fit for you: https://Rachel-Bailey.as.me/Influence

Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/180

Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Episode 301: Raise Children Who Are Resilient, Not Entitled15 Feb 202400:16:03

Because our children struggle with challenging situations and feelings, we want to give them what they need to be resilient. But if we’re being honest, sometimes it's easier in the moment to give them what they WANT instead of what they NEED to be able to handle the obstacles they will inevitably face in life. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • How to know whether we’re meeting our kids’ wants or needs -- and when we need to make a change!

  • What our children actually need from us to become more resilient 

  • The easiest way to meet our kids’ emotional needs (with examples!) for stronger self-esteem and healthier relationships

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Talk to Rachel about whether the "Become a Powerful Positve Influence" Action Program is a fit for you: https://Rachel-Bailey.as.me/Influence

Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Episode 300: Sharing Details About My Life08 Feb 202400:14:28

Today we are celebrating our 300th episode with a more personal episode as I respond to listener-submitted questions. If you’ve ever wanted to learn a little more than the parenting tips I share, you’ll be able to do that now! 

In this episode, you’ll hear:

  • What I was like as a child - including the worst thing I ever did! 

  • How and why I started a business helping parents 

  • Some quotes that inspire me, both as a parent and as a person

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Free video series for parents raising children with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/

Coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

 

Episode 299: Stop Trying to Get Your Children to Change Their Behavior or Moods25 Jan 202400:14:31

When our children are having big emotions or behaviors, it’s natural to want those big feelings and behaviors to stop so that there is more fighting, no more disrespectful attitudes, no more drama. Unfortunately, there’s one problem: We can’t control how our kids feel or how they behave. And when we try, we just make the situation worse (and we feel worse).

Fortunately, there is an alternative that leads to a better outcome – AND doesn’t require us to give in to them. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why our need to control others leaves us exhausted

  • How to address big feelings without trying to change other people

  • A simple shift that will reduce resentment and lead to more peace and influence with our children

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Talk to Rachel about whether the "Become a Powerful Positve Influence" Action Program is a fit for you: https://Rachel-Bailey.as.me/Influence

Coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Episode 298: How to be a Powerful Positive Influence When Your Child Is Upset or Not Listening18 Jan 202400:18:47

Why do some kids listen more to one parent than another? Why do some kids seem to calm down more quickly around one parent than another? Often the difference is that one parent is a powerful positive influence, while the other isn’t. The good news is that any parent can learn to be a powerful positive influence.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • What we need to give our kids if we want to be more influential 

  • How becoming a Powerful Positive Influence can motivate better behavior and healthier self-esteem -- without yelling, punishing, or shaming

  • Two necessary qualities that will help you become a Powerful Positive Influence with your children 

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Apply to join the "Become a Powerful Positve Influence" Action Program: https://forms.gle/JTfYQfUXWeg5cpmR8

Talk to Rachel about whether the "Become a Powerful Positve Influence" Action Program is a fit for you: https://Rachel-Bailey.as.me/Influence

Coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Episode 297: Why Our Kids With Big Emotions Need Us to Have Firm Boundaries11 Jan 202400:12:46

Many people confuse “respectful parenting” with permissive parenting, thinking that respectful parents give into the whims of their children to make them feel good.

But caving to our kids’ feelings and reactions is not respectful…to them or to us. Believe it or not, firm boundaries are a hallmark of respect-based parenting. And firm boundaries are what our children with big emotions really need.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • What firm parenting boundaries look like

  • Reasons why setting limits can be uncomfortable for us (and how to deal with the discomfort)

  • How to respond to our children’s big emotions respectfully

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Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Raising Resilience Membership: https://rachel-bailey.com/raising-resilience-membership/

Episode 296: My Parenting "Fails" (And What I Do When They Happen)28 Dec 202300:12:39

Sometimes people assume that because I teach parenting strategies for a living, I’m always parenting the way I want to. I actually think that assumption is dangerous, so I wanted to offer just a few of my parenting regrets... some of which you may be able to relate to! 

 In this episode, I’ll share: 

  • Some of my personal parenting fails 

  • How I handle those fails – sometimes “successfully,” sometimes not

  • What I do when I recognize that I’m not parenting the way I want to 

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Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

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Raising Resilience Membership: https://rachel-bailey.com/raising-resilience-membership/

Episode 295: When Strategies You Try Don’t Work for Your Child21 Dec 202300:15:34

Even when you listen to so many tips and parenting strategies available, it can be difficult to find those that actually work with kids with big emotions. And when nothing we try seems to make a difference, it’s easy to feel helpless. But it is possible to identify what our children need in order to feel and act better.  

 In this episode, you’ll learn: 

  • Why our definition of “what works” doesn't always work! 

  • What our kids need more than rewards or punishments

  • Two things our children must have in order to do the things that we want them to do 

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Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Raising Resilience Membership: https://rachel-bailey.com/raising-resilience-membership/

Bonus Episode 1: A Plan for Holiday Success (Based on What's in Your Control)28 Nov 202400:13:51

https://rachel-bailey.com/?p=88635Holidays can be hard for kids with big emotions. From staying up late to being out of regular routines to being overstimulated, this season can leave us all feeling exhausted and stressed. In this bonus episode, I share a plan for holiday stress that doesn’t take a lot of time... and almost always leads to success!

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why taking 5-10 minutes now will save you hours later 

  • The steps in this process, with an example of each 

  • How this plan ensures that you will feel more in control this holiday season 

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FREE RESOURCE: Plan for Success with the 4Ps (and examples)

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Join Rachel’s Facebook group

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions

Episode 294: When a Child Is Disrespectful14 Dec 202300:16:46

There is almost nothing more upsetting than when a child acts disrespectful. And of course when our kids talk back, roll their eyes at us, or ignore us…we don’t always respond effectively. How can we learn to understand children’s disrespect so that we can give them the coping skills they need to act more maturely? 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Two simple reasons children are often disrespectful to their parents, even when they know they shouldn't be 

  • How to respond in the moment to behavior that is rude or dismissive  

  • How to increase your influence so your child NATURALLY respects you 

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Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Raising Resilience Membership: https://rachel-bailey.com/raising-resilience-membership/

Episode 293: When You Feel Guilty About Something You're Doing (Or Not Doing)07 Dec 202300:13:30

You have an idea in your mind of what you “should” be doing as a parent. But how often do you feel like you’re falling short of your own expectations? So many of us feel guilty on a regular basis, and it can be exhausting. But there is something you can do to reduce your guilt (and get some energy back!). 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • What happens when we let go of parenting guilt

  • One question we can ask ourselves to turn our guilt into confidence

  • How to create a simple plan that will empower you to parent from your values so you feel less bad about what you’ve done (or not done)

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Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Raising Resilience Membership: https://rachel-bailey.com/raising-resilience-membership/

Episode 292: When Your Child Lies01 Dec 202300:14:23

Dealing with children’s lies can be very upsetting. When we know that they’re not telling the truth, we may feel disrespected and helpless and worry about how this behavior will impact our child (and our connection) in the future. How can we stop the lying once and for all – without harming our relationship?

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • The real reasons our kids tend to lie 

  • The strategies that don’t stop lying behavior (and why!)

  • The mindset shift we need to make in order to influence our kids to stop lying 

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Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Raising Resilience Membership: https://rachel-bailey.com/raising-resilience-membership/

Episode 291: What I Learned as a Child With Big Emotions & What I’m Grateful For23 Nov 202300:12:37

We love our children with big emotions, but sometimes our love isn’t enough to build their confidence, especially when their strong feelings confuse them so much. 

As a child I had trouble believing in myself, and I’d like to share my experience with you – and why your children are likely better off than I was! 

In this episode, you’ll hear:

  • What I learned as a child with big emotions

  • Two hard-to-hear things our children with big emotions often believe about themselves 

  • How Long Game Parenting strategies help our kids become more resilient and capable

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Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Raising Resilience Membership: https://rachel-bailey.com/raising-resilience-membership/

Episode 290: Why Setting One Limit at a Time Increases Your Influence (& Gives You Time Back!)16 Nov 202300:13:59

We know that consistency is really important for our children with big emotions. But sometimes it feels like we spend all of our time enforcing limits – at the expense of our relationship! How can we teach our kids to do the things they need to do without feeling helpless or like we’ll have to nag forever?

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • How to outsmart kids’ “avoider brain” 

  • How to find and address the real reasons for resistance 

  • How to get to the point where you can nag less so you can spend more enjoyable time with your children 

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Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Raising Resilience Membership: https://rachel-bailey.com/raising-resilience-membership/

Episode 289: When Children Tell You To Go Away But Get Mad When You Do09 Nov 202300:12:08

Raising a child with big emotions can feel like a roller coaster some days. One moment they might be yelling at you to go away… and the next moment they’re angry that you did what they asked. What do we do when our child does something that seems illogical and nothing we do is helping?

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • What’s underneath kids’ seemingly-illogical behavior 

  • How to understand what’s going on inside our kids before addressing their (outer) behavior 

  • How to make a plan for handling your child’s big -- and sometimes illogical -- reactions in the future. (And it’s easier than you think!) 

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Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Raising Resilience Membership: https://rachel-bailey.com/raising-resilience-membership/

Episode 288: Why Nothing Seems to Work When Your Child Is Having a Big Reaction02 Nov 202300:15:18

If you have a child who tends to have big emotions or reactions, you’ve probably tried many different things to reduce the drama in that moment. But you may not have found much success, so you’re dealing with the drama over and over (or you’re walking on eggshells to prevent their big reaction!). 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why it’s so hard to shift things in the moment once a child is reactive 

  • What to focus on as your child is having a big emotion so that the situation goes more smoothly

  • Two simple ideas to regulate ourselves when our kids are melting down

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Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Raising Resilience Membership: https://rachel-bailey.com/raising-resilience-membership/

A Quick Way to “Deposit Into” Your Child With Big Emotions19 Oct 202300:14:10

You probably know from experience that the stronger our relationship with our kids, the more smoothly things go. But these days, when everyone is so busy, it can be challenging to find enough time to strengthen our relationships. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why a strong connection does make a positive difference in their behavior, moods, and attitudes

  • A way to stop feeling guilty about how little time (or energy) you have to spend with them 

  • Quick ideas for small “deposits” that have a big impact

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Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Raising Resilience Membership: https://rachel-bailey.com/raising-resilience-membership/

BONUS Episode: "Ask Me 3" With Pediatric Sleep Consultant Bonnie Dimmick16 Oct 202300:26:28

Welcome to a bonus "Ask Me 3" episode with pediatric sleep consultant Bonnie Dimmick!

Listen as I ask Bonnie 3 questions:
1. For families with toddlers, preschoolers or young kids that aren't sleeping independently, is it too late to help them learn? 
2. How can I get my kids to stop stalling so much and all their curtain calls at bedtime?
3. All of a sudden my great sleeper refuses to fall asleep without me in the room and is waking up at night, what should I do?

Listen as Bonnie asks me 3 questions: 
1. How do you deal best with periods where a child has a very strong parental preference?
2. What are your best tips for handling kids who hate making mistakes and it feels like logic and modeling aren't working? 
3. How do you get kids to practice hard things or try something new without bribery or how do you recommend handling this?

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FREE RESOURCES
Rachel's free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Rachel's Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Rachel's Raising Resilience Membership: https://rachel-bailey.com/raising-resilience-membership/

Episode 286: When Coping Strategies Don’t Reduce Kids' Big Emotions12 Oct 202300:15:43

Many of us have tried to teach our kids healthy coping strategies, but often they don’t use those strategies in the moment when they’re upset. And then we feel helpless when nothing we say or do seems to help them calm down! 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • An important reason that your child might not be using coping strategies

  • What our kids need us to do in the moment when they’re in Yuck

  • How we foster resilience and strengthen our relationship by giving our children what they need 

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Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Raising Resilience Membership: https://rachel-bailey.com/raising-resilience-membership/

Episode 329: Change One Word To Make a Big Difference to a Child With Big Emotions (or Anyone!)21 Nov 202400:09:20

Show Notes:

It can be hard to know what to say to a child with big emotions when they're struggling. And while it’s important not to pressure yourself to say the “right thing” all the time, one small change (that you can make immediately) will almost always make things better in those situations.  

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why one word (that most of us use all the time) almost always upsets children with big emotions 

  • The alternative word that can make a positive difference in negative situations 

  • How this shift improves our influence in the moment and strengthens our children’s self-esteem in the long run

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FREE RESOURCE: Reminder of “but” to “because” strategy + examples

Apply to Rachel’s “Beyond Behavior Blueprint” program

Join Rachel’s Facebook group

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions

Episode 285: A Tip to NOT Get Sucked into Your Kids’ Yuck05 Oct 202300:15:36

When our kids have big feelings -- and even BIGGER reactions -- it can be a challenge to avoid getting sucked in. The good news is that even if they are being dramatic, complaining about little things, arguing with a sibling, or simply shutting down, it is possible to stay out of their Yuck and avoid making situations worse.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • What happens to our adult brains when our kids are stuck in Yuck

  • Two steps we can take to parent from our values rather than reacting in a way we regret

  • How simple changes we make can positively impact kids’ self-esteem and our relationship with them in the long run 

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Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Raising Resilience Membership: https://rachel-bailey.com/raising-resilience-membership/

BONUS Episode: "Ask Me 3" With Mari Collins Harris, Founder of Child-Led Shopping App25 Sep 202300:23:17

Welcome to a bonus "Ask Me 3" episode with Mari Collins Harris! 

Listen as I ask Mari the 3 questions:
1. How does Ketshop help teach kids personal responsibility? 
2. How can Ketshop help reduce clutter in the home?
3. How does buyer's remorse help children to learn budgeting?

Listen as Mari asks me the 3 questions:
1. Chores vs. Allowance: how do you give your kids money without spoiling them? 
2. How can you teach your kids to be generous? 
3. How can we encourage our kids to use technology responsibly?

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Ketshop app: https://ketshop.com/

Rachel's free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Rachel's Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Rachel's Raising Resilience Membership: https://rachel-bailey.com/raising-resilience-membership/

Episode 284: A Tip to Reduce Drama Around Homework21 Sep 202300:16:13

Homework can bring up lots of feelings in our kids with big emotions, including frustration, stress, and overwhelm. While we’d like our children to do homework without drama, what do we do when they won’t listen to logic or finish their work without fighting us every step of the way?

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why our children struggle to complete their homework, even if they know how to do it 

  • One tool that can help our children stay on task (without nagging or fighting)

  • How homework can teach our kids lifelong skills that will help them find success in the long run -- and strengthen our parent-child relationship along the way!

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Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Raising Resilience Membership: https://rachel-bailey.com/raising-resilience-membership/

Episode 283: A Simple Strategy for Handling Parenting Mistakes14 Sep 202300:16:35

We know that it’s ideal to handle difficult parenting situations with patience and respect. But often when we’re tired or frustrated, our Yuck gets the best of us and we say and do things that we regret. And then, of course, we feel awful. But mistakes don’t need to make us feel guilty… in fact, making them can be quite helpful. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why it’s important to “mess up” as a parent 

  • An effective way to repair a relationship after we do something that hurts our child

  • How we can use our mistakes to help children take responsibility for themselves as well

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Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Raising Resilience Membership: https://rachel-bailey.com/raising-resilience-membership/

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