This episode comes with content warnings. To be able to accurately describe the level of verbal and physical abuse in this story, it was necessary to include actual accounts that include obscene language, drug usage, and violent acts. The intent of the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is never to sensationalize abuse. But there is the need to allow actual survivors to report their stories as they remember them without editing. Abuse is ugly. We want our listeners will learn to be able to detect, avoid, and break free from impending intimate partner violence in any form. This is part one of a two-part story. This story is actually two survivor stories in one. Melody and Lizzie are each survivors of Harry, a toxic serial abuser. What makes what you're about to hear so unique is Melody and Lizzie were married to Harry in succession. One after the other. You will see how an abuser can be methodical. In both cases, the attraction to him at first was quite similar – so were the warning signs, the mounting concerns, the emotional and verbal abuse, and the physical abuse. Of course there were similarities – they were married to the same abuser. Harry merely took what worked in one relationship into the next relationship. We will first hear Melody's story. Then we will move to Lizzie's story. See that if they knew and followed the warning signs, they would have missed a lifetime a misery from this one predatory abuser. Bill Mitchell NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: ⁠⁠⁠BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com⁠⁠⁠ The ⁠⁠⁠WHEN DATING HURTS book⁠⁠⁠ (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – ⁠⁠⁠The Hotline.org ⁠⁠⁠– Call 800-799-SAFE • ⁠⁠⁠LoveIsRespect⁠⁠⁠ – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – ⁠⁠⁠RAINN.org⁠⁠⁠ – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell ⁠⁠⁠WhenDatingHurts.com⁠⁠⁠ DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This episode comes with a long list of warning signs. The graphic descriptions of domestic violence in this survivor story can be triggering to some. But the scenes depicted needed to be included so listeners can know what often happens in unhealthy relationships. Please decide carefully whether you should listen to this episode or not. Kelly Sutliff felt she had the perfect husband until the day he nearly killed her. There were warning signs, but she either did not interpret them or she ignored them. Kelly tells us exactly what it was like to be married to this man. We can see how easy it is to be tricked by someone as practiced as her husband, Chris. She will explain, in detail, the day she was nearly murdered by him. Today, as a survivor, Kelly has managed to pick up the pieces of her life and is living a better life than she would ever have imagined. For protection after she broke free from her abusive predator husband, Kelly acquired a protection dog named Stella. This led to her immense appreciation and love for these life-protectors. She now has two additional protection dogs. If that is not enough, Kelly started a non-profit to help both train protection dogs and find those in need of these magnificent dogs. It's entitled Kelly's K9s, Tails of Courage. You can learn more by following the link provided here: Kelly’s K9s, Tails of Courage.⁠ You can donate to Kelly's K9s by following this link. Kelly’s K9s relies solely on your generous donations and support.  It costs a minimum of $25,000 to breed and train a protection dog.  While $25,000 may seem like a significant amount, the safety and empowerment of domestic violence survivors are worth every penny.  Their lives, their futures, and their right to live free from fear and harm are priceless.  NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: ⁠⁠BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com⁠⁠ The ⁠⁠WHEN DATING HURTS book⁠⁠ (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – ⁠⁠The Hotline.org ⁠⁠– Call 800-799-SAFE • ⁠⁠LoveIsRespect⁠⁠ – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – ⁠⁠RAINN.org⁠⁠ – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell ⁠⁠WhenDatingHurts.com⁠⁠ DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part one of a two-part story. This story comes with warnings about all kinds of drug abuse, alcohol, abuse, plus many situations describing emotional and physical violence. These can be triggering to some. Your number one job is to protect yourself. We are not attempting to be shocking, we are sharing these stories so you can know how bad Domestic Violence can get. Simone lives in Australia. She gets top grades for hanging onto a man no matter what she faced with him. "Ben" gave her every reason to call it quits, to drop him, and move far away. But she was determined to save him, no matter what. She was completely devoted to fixing Ben and saving their marriage, but like every "fixer" thus far on this WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, she got more than she ever imagined. None of it good. Simone managed excellence in every facet of her life, but fixing Ben was beyond her vast capabilities. I don't know many partners who would have given a man this troubled this much grace. ADVICE: If a relationship doesn't feel right from the start, get out early. If you don't know how to get out, ask a domestic violence counselor. The ripple effects of a dangerous relationship can interrupt every facet of your entire life. Bill Mitchell NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: ⁠⁠⁠⁠BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ The ⁠⁠⁠⁠WHEN DATING HURTS book⁠⁠⁠⁠ (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – ⁠⁠⁠⁠The Hotline.org ⁠⁠⁠⁠– Call 800-799-SAFE • ⁠⁠VictimsVoice⁠⁠ – Everything they do empowers people to have happier, healthier lives beyond all forms of abuse. • ⁠⁠⁠⁠LoveIsRespect⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – ⁠⁠⁠⁠RAINN.org⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part one of a three-part narrative with Candi Rose. Candi Rose is her actual name. Her full name is Candace Rose. She was bullied in high school to the point where her mother moved her to a different school. There she fell in with the wrong crowd. Things became worse as she made a series of unfortunate decisions. Her lack of experience, wisdom, or good judgment landed her in jail as a convicted felon. Once released what did she do to make a living? She became a stripper. The twists and turns of Candi's life will have you tightly holding on. But, as with every survivor story, there is an abuse and there is as ascendence out to freedom and safety. This is Candi Rose's story. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I attended a podcast convention earlier this year. I left some leave-behinds and business cards with the hope of landing guests spots on national podcasts. It's another way to get the word out about dating abuse and intimate partner violence. Soon after the convention, I was contacted by Mary Fernandez, the host of the "Leadership, Legacies and Legends Unleashed" podcast. She invited me to speak on her show. This is our conversation. It's quite informative overall but the parts about the warning signs of unhealthy relationships and something I call "The Template Every Abuser Follows" make this podcast episode worth your time in listening. Thank you for listening in and subscribing. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

There is little chance we will ever get an abuser to join us on this podcast and do a recorded interview. But, we have heard enough about the minds of abusers to have insights into what we would hear. It would be the justification of actions taken purely to gain control over another person. It would be a relentless pushback. That is what you will find in this episode. This episode, our third in this mini-series, comes with content and trigger warnings: Domestic abuse, domestic violence, and graphic violence. The voice you hear on this WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast episode was created by artificial intelligence. It is not a real person's voice. The words spoken are a composite of beliefs and concepts expressed by dating and domestic abusers found within articles and interviews. They have been collected over nearly two decades. They have been reassembled as complete ideas and thoughts.   This episode illustrates how abusers portray themselves as victims. There is not one "portrait" that fits all abusers, of course, but many never take ownership of their words or actions, and they justify their abusive and destructive behavior.   Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I was invited to join in an interview with True Crime Connections podcast host, Tiffanie. This was the perfect venue to continue our review of life-saving information like my latest list of warning signs. Only in the past year have I uncovered some new ones worth hearing about. I also shared what I call the "Template Every Abuser Follows". These are important areas to know since intimate partner violence does not present itself as evil at first. "IPV" often appears like "this someone" is the embodiment of your dreams. It's all wonderful until you begin to know the real person behind the mask. Thanks to Tiffanie, the host of the True Crime Connections podcast for this opportunity to speak before a new audience of listeners. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The following story comes with trigger warnings due to both its content and graphic descriptions. This is part one of a two-part story. Beany Chalfant brought her story to me in an email. I knew she needed to tell her narrative to us. By the time she reached 40, she had never been close to intimate partner violence. But all of that changed with one boyfriend. In the beginning, he seemed to bring everything she was missing, but before long, he was more than she could handle. The story shows us, once more, that having no awareness of the warning signs of an unhealthy relationship makes it too easy to become swallowed alive by an abusive predator. Beany reached the point where she found ways to live with the frequent emotional and violent behavior doled out by her boyfriend. In his twisted mind, he felt he could do anything he wanted. And when she tried to stop him, he resorted to threatening her life and the lives of her children. How does anyone remain in a relationship this toxic for 10 years? Listen to the story and you will see. This is Beany’s story. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The following story comes with trigger warnings due to both its content and graphic descriptions. This is part one of a two-part story. Beany Chalfant brought her story to me in an email. I knew she needed to tell her narrative to us. By the time she reached 40, she had never been close to intimate partner violence. But all of that changed with one boyfriend. In the beginning, he seemed to bring everything she was missing, but before long, he was more than she could handle. The story shows us, once more, that having no awareness of the warning signs of an unhealthy relationship makes it too easy to become swallowed alive by an abusive predator. Beany reached the point where she found ways to live with the frequent emotional and violent behavior doled out by her boyfriend. In his twisted mind, he felt he could do anything he wanted. And when she tried to stop him, he resorted to threatening her life and the lives of her children. How does anyone remain in a relationship this toxic for 10 years? Listen to the story and you will see. This is Beany’s story. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part two of a two-part story with Claire. It comes with trigger warnings for its content and graphic descriptions. I was sent a link with a news segment from the West Coast. The newscasters were showing body cam footage of an intimate partner violence case that would later head into court. The footage was eerie to watch. It puts you right there outside of the building watching a man deny knowing anything had happened. But eventually, police find Claire in their apartment. Of course, an arrest follows. Had someone, a passerby, not called for the police, it's uncertain if Claire would have survived further bodily harm from this disgusting man. The predator who abused Claire had met a target he could manipulate, take complete of, and repeatedly injure. She thought she loved him, and she was prepared to do anything to save the relationship no matter now toxic it became. This is Claire's story. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part one of a two-part story with Claire. It comes with trigger warnings for its content and graphic descriptions. I was sent a link with a news segment from the West Coast. The newscasters were showing body cam footage of an intimate partner violence case that would later head into court. The footage was eerie to watch. It puts you right there outside of the building watching a man deny knowing anything had happened. But eventually, police find Claire in their apartment. Of course, an arrest follows. Had someone, a passerby, not called for the police, it's uncertain if Claire would have survived further bodily harm from this disgusting man. The predator who abused Claire had met a target he could manipulate, take complete of, and repeatedly injure. She thought she loved him, and she was prepared to do anything to save the relationship no matter now toxic it became. This is Claire's story. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part two of Cynthia’s two-part story of survival. It comes with trigger warnings due to its content and some descriptions. You will feel her innocence throughout. She is a trusting soul and sometimes it has gotten her into places that are impossible to escape. Trouble often seemed to follow. Cynthia is not perfect. She has made mistakes. But it seems most of her mistakes have cost her dearly. No matter what Cynthia has endured in life, she managed to remain positive, and she looked for the good in people. This is Cynthia’s story. It comes with a long list of hurdles throughout, and lessons learned the hard way. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part one of Cynthia’s two-part story of survival. It comes with trigger warnings due to its content and some descriptions. You will feel her innocence throughout. She is a trusting soul and sometimes it has gotten her into places that are impossible to escape. Trouble often seemed to follow. Cynthia is not perfect. She has made mistakes. But it seems most of her mistakes have cost her dearly. No matter what Cynthia has endured in life, she managed to remain positive, and she looked for the good in people. This is Cynthia’s story. It comes with a long list of hurdles throughout, and lessons learned the hard way. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We spend most of our time on the WHEN DATIGN HURTS podcast discussing ways to detect when a person might actually be an abusive predator. That's why survivors join us and why we discuss the warning signs. But we are not solving the problem, we are suggesting ways to not become destroyed by the problem: predatory abusers A transformation of the way people interact could make life better and safer. It could make life fair and equal. We are honored to include two members of the organization called, Gender Equity and Reconciliation International. In the discussion, they refer to their organization as GERI. Reverend Laurie Gaum and Tristan Johannes are facilitators of discussions with GERI. Reverend Gaum is also a minister with the Dutch Reformed Church. Both men are from Cape Town, South Africa. Listen closely, because their accents are rather heavy, but what they will tell us is quite easily understood. The GERI project brings people together from around the world to discuss and heal from trauma and other experiences related to gender and sexuality. GERI convene groups of men and women (and people of all gender identities and expressions) to work closely together. Their goal: heal from the past and begin rewriting the future of gender relation in the human family. Learn more about GERI at genderreconciliationinternational.org. There you can find more about them and see how to get their new book. NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I was asked by Dan Woerheide to join him on his Narrowing the Divide podcast. This podcast series is actually Dan working as a career coach, but he feels everyone working needs to know more about dating abuse and domestic violence. It will eventually touch every life. I appreciate Dan for inviting me to speak on his show. It's a new audience for me to tell what I know about domestic violence. We cover a lot of ground in this conversation. You will hear my latest list of warning signs, and something I call "The Template Every Abuser Follows". I promise you this episode will be worth your time. You might want to take notes. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part two of a two-part story. It comes with trigger warnings due to its content and descriptions. Alexandra story begins in Australia, where she was born and where we meet up with Michael. He was an artist and a narcissistic abuser. The kind of a guy we lie awake at night hoping our daughters never meet up with or date. The story takes us from Australia to Vienna, Austria and then to Poland where the abuse from Michael turns from the emotional to physical violence as horrible as we can imagine. We see how trauma bonding takes place and it is almost impossible to break free. There is a stop in Sweden where a brief relationship with a man named Magnus begins. Fortunately, that one ended abruptly and finally. We will let Alexandra tell her story. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part one of a two-part story. It comes with trigger warnings due to its content and descriptions. Alexandra story begins in Australia, where she was born and where we meet up with Michael. He was an artist and a narcissistic abuser. The kind of a guy we lie awake at night hoping our daughters never meet up with or date. The story takes us from Australia to Vienna, Austria and then to Poland where the abuse from Michael turns from the emotional to physical violence as horrible as we can imagine. We see how trauma bonding takes place and it is almost impossible to break free. There is a stop in Sweden where a brief relationship with a man named Magnus begins. Fortunately, that one ended abruptly and finally. We will let Alexandra tell her story. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part two of a two-part story. Deborah’s story takes us to places many of us have never been before. She spent time in the US Navy and then the US Army. We go to Virginia, California, Kentucky, and even Afghanistan before her return to the US. Before heading into Afghanistan with the US Army, Deborah meets Scott, who does a brilliant portrayal of being everyone’s best buddy while winning over Deborah’s heart. It here where warning signs are on full display but are unfortunately missed. Upon her return from Afghanistan, while in the US Army, Deborah, learns, she is pregnant with her first child. At this point, the relationship takes a major turn for the worse. This story shows how a covert narcissist can take on many disguises and fool many people. But when a narcissist is called out, or is not being obeyed, life can become turbulent and dangerous for the person being targeted. In this story, we see how Scott handles himself when Deborah is not compliant. We also learn how Deborah manages to keep her mind together when she is put to the test time and time again. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part one of a two-part story. Deborah’s story takes us to places many of us have never been before. She spent time in the US Navy and then the US Army. We go to Virginia, California, Kentucky, and even Afghanistan before her return to the US. Before heading into Afghanistan with the US Army, Deborah meets Scott, who does a brilliant portrayal of being everyone’s best buddy while winning over Deborah’s heart. It here where warning signs are on full display but are unfortunately missed. Upon her return from Afghanistan, while in the US Army, Deborah, learns, she is pregnant with her first child. At this point, the relationship takes a major turn for the worse. This story shows how a covert narcissist can take on many disguises and fool many people. But when a narcissist is called out, or is not being obeyed, life can become turbulent and dangerous for the person being targeted. In this story, we see how Scott handles himself when Deborah is not compliant. We also learn how Deborah manages to keep her mind together when she is put to the test time and time again. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Every survivor story comes with reasons to listen carefully and learn the many facets of dating and domestic violence. This story is certainly no exception. For those of you thinking domestic violence doesn’t happen to people like you, Jamie’s narrative stands as evidence to the contrary. She was a college graduate. A law school graduate. And then a prosecutor in a district attorney’s office near Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. What is so ironic? She was the prosecutor of criminal cases oftentimes like what she was experiencing within her personal life at that time. And yet, she was not thinking of her difficulties as abuse. When she realized she was technically a domestic violence victim, she felt guilt and shame for not coming forth and taking the kinds of legal steps against her abuser she would have urged her clients to take. Jamie wants to underscore dating and domestic violence can—and does—happen to anyone in any profession. This is what finally helped her turn the corner on her shame. This interview is her way to reach out to the world and use her story to help shine the light of knowledge about abuse. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Every survivor story comes with reasons to listen carefully and learn the many facets of dating and domestic violence. This story is certainly no exception. For those of you thinking domestic violence doesn’t happen to people like you, Jamie’s narrative stands as evidence to the contrary. She was a college graduate. A law school graduate. And then a prosecutor in a district attorney’s office near Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. What is so ironic? She was the prosecutor of criminal cases oftentimes like what she was experiencing within her personal life at that time. And yet, she was not thinking of her difficulties as abuse. When she realized she was technically a domestic violence victim, she felt guilt and shame for not coming forth and taking the kinds of legal steps against her abuser she would have urged her clients to take. Jamie wants to underscore dating and domestic violence can—and does—happen to anyone in any profession. This is what finally helped her turn the corner on her shame. This interview is her way to reach out to the world and use her story to help shine the light of knowledge about abuse.  Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I met "Caitlyn" in November 2009 moments before I gave a speech about my daughter's dating violence murder.  What Caitlyn described about her abuse was the most horrific story I had ever heard -- short of murder. It continues to disturb me even now.  I was fortunate to conduct this interview with Caitlyn. Her story shows how bad domestic violence can get, but also demonstrates how strong a determined woman can be.  There is no person I respect more than Caitlyn. You will soon know why.  Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This the final part in a three-part story. Sarah’s story of abuse starts off a bit slow but then it really gets rolling. It covers many of the warning signs (red flags) of what became an unhealthy relationship, and later, and awkward, disrespectful, one-sided, abusive marriage. Plus, there were children involved. Sarah somehow managed to stay true to herself. She never became as awful as the behavior that came her way from her husband.    There is so much to be learned in this heroic narrative about a young woman trying to make sense and live with someone when she was not prepared.    This is Sarah’s survivor story.  Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part two in a three-part story. Sarah’s story of abuse starts off a bit slow but then it really gets rolling. It covers many of the warning signs (red flags) of what became an unhealthy relationship, and later, and awkward, disrespectful, one-sided, abusive marriage. Plus, there were children involved. Sarah somehow managed to stay true to herself. She never became as awful as the behavior that came her way from her husband.    There is so much to be learned in this heroic narrative about a young woman trying to make sense and live with someone when she was not prepared.    This is Sarah’s survivor story.  Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part two of a two-part story. Sometimes we are attracted to the "bad boys", the ones who make things exciting and live on the edge. They don't listen to authority and make their own rules. Melanie had her eyes on one of the bad boys, John. He was different. He wasn't boring. And the flaws he had she was sure she could fix. As abusers go, John was never holding back. From the time they started dating–and during the time they were married with two children–John did whatever he wanted, when he wanted. It is one thing to be abused, but quite another when there are children involved. Melanie shared this story to teach us about the warning signs using real-life, examples. It is up to us to remember this lesson. This is Melanie's story. NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part one in a three-part story. Sarah’s story of abuse starts off a bit slow but then it really gets rolling. It covers many of the warning signs (red flags) of what became an unhealthy relationship, and later, and awkward, disrespectful, one-sided, abusive marriage. Plus, there were children involved. Sarah somehow managed to stay true to herself. She never became as awful as the behavior that came her way from her husband. There is so much to be learned in this heroic narrative about a young woman trying to make sense and live with someone when she was not prepared. This is Sarah’s survivor story. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is Lee Ann’s story part two of two parts. Our interview with Lee Ann, who lives in Florida, covers a lot of dating and domestic violence topics. You’ll hear about love bombing, overt narcissism, emotional and physical violence, and the rise and fall of a fortune made and lost. There is coercive control, deception, even degradation. You will also hear of the deaths of two ex-husbands. It’s all in this conversation. From living in a manor house with a housekeeper, to living on the run after calling in police to break up a domestic dispute, Lee Ann has seen it all. And she has experience at all.    And through it all, Lee Ann has been a determined survivor who found plenty of strength and she continues to recover. Lee Ann has never told her entire domestic violence story to anyone before.    This is Lee Ann’s story.  Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is Lee Ann’s story part one of two parts. Our interview with Lee Ann, who lives in Florida, covers a lot of dating and domestic violence topics. You’ll hear about love bombing, overt narcissism, emotional and physical violence, and the rise and fall of a fortune made and lost. There is coercive control, deception, even degradation. You will also hear of the deaths of two ex-husbands. It’s all in this conversation. From living in a manor house with a housekeeper, to living on the run after calling in police to break up a domestic dispute, Lee Ann has seen it all. And she has experience at all. And through it all, Lee Ann has been a determined survivor who found plenty of strength and she continues to recover. Lee Ann has never told her entire domestic violence story to anyone before. This is Lee Ann’s story. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This time, I'm the one being interviewed.  This conversation tells the whole story about how the WHEN DATING HURTS book and podcast came about--the hard way. It's good to know our podcast has the opportunity to be talked about before a whole-new group of listeners. This is one of the surest ways to grow our listening audience. If you do not know my family's story, this is a good opportunity. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This episode comes with content and trigger warnings: Domestic abuse, domestic violence, and graphic violence. The voice you hear on this WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast episode was created by artificial intelligence. It is not a real person's voice. The words spoken are a composite of beliefs and concepts expressed by dating and domestic abusers found within articles and interviews. They have been collected over nearly two decades. They have been reassembled as complete ideas and thoughts.   This episode illustrates how abusers portray themselves as victims. There is not one "portrait" that fits all abusers, of course, but many never take ownership of their words or actions, and they justify their abusive and destructive behavior.     Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part two in a two-part story.   At 16-years of age, Marie and a few high school friends went to a local university to hang out at some social events. That’s where she met Jake. Jake was a 21-year-old college student with aspirations of playing football. But injuries took that dream away from him. Instead, he used opioids and other means to deal with pain. In truth, he was addicted but said he had it under control. The Marie and Jake relationship “stuck”, and it lasted for years that included a list of red flags. While listening to Marie’s story, we find ourselves hoping she will see the light and direct her affections elsewhere. But it will take a long time for her to get there. In part two of her story, Marie speaks about an internship which allowed her to listen to highly dangerous domestic violence predators on probation. She gained powerful insights into the minds of abusers. Insights which helped her see Jake for who he truly was. In practical ways, this story describes red flags, drug abuse, dating abuse, coercive control, poor decision-making, and so many other missteps made (and consequences brought) in peoples’ lives. This is Marie’s story.  Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part one in a two-part story. At 16-years of age, Marie and a few high school friends went to a local university to hang out at some social events. That’s where she met Jake. Jake was a 21-year-old college student with aspirations of playing football. But injuries took that dream away from him. Instead, he used opioids and other means to deal with pain. In truth, he was addicted but said he had it under control. The Marie and Jake relationship “stuck”, and it lasted for years that included a list of red flags. While listening to Marie’s story, we find ourselves hoping she will see the light and direct her affections elsewhere. But it will take a long time for her to get there. In part two of her story, Marie speaks about an internship which allowed her to listen to highly dangerous domestic violence predators on probation. She gained powerful insights into the minds of abusers. Insights which helped her see Jake for who he truly was. In practical ways, this story describes red flags, drug abuse, dating abuse, coercive control, poor decision-making, and so many other missteps made (and consequences brought) in peoples’ lives. This is Marie’s story. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is the second in a two-part story with Erin. Erin was taken advantage of while she was suffering through a highly sensitive passage in her life. Charlie presented himself as the right answer at the right time. Like many victims, she was an innocent, generous person. The kind of target predators are looking to lure straight into problematic relationships. The warning signs of potential danger were there, but Erin didn’t interpret them. You will learn plenty from this powerful episode. You will see how difficult it is to break from an accomplished abuser. You need to hear Erin's story.    Be sure you share this WHEN DATING HURTS episode with someone who's dating.    Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is the first in a two-part story with Erin.  Erin was taken advantage of while she was suffering through a highly sensitive passage in her life. Charlie presented himself as the right answer at the right time.  Like many victims, she was an innocent, generous person. The kind of target predators are looking to lure straight into problematic relationships.  The warning signs of potential danger were there, but Erin didn’t interpret them. You will learn plenty from this powerful episode. You will see how difficult it is to break from an accomplished abuser. You need to hear Erin's story. Be sure you share this WHEN DATING HURTS episode with someone who's dating. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part one of two parts with Amanda.   This interview comes with all the trigger warnings. Amanda lives in Australia, but her story could have taken place anywhere in the world. The treatment Amanda and her twin sister (named J.J.) received as babies continued into their teen years. It is shocking, disturbing, inhumane, and, frankly, impossible to comprehend. But it is true, nonetheless. This is Domestic Violence at its ugliest. The redeeming facet about Amanda’s story is how it never managed to break her. Her generous spirit can be witnessed here. She somehow was able to find a way to live through it all and took a heroic path in life. This is Amanda's story. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part one of a two-part story. Sometimes we are attracted to the "bad boys", the ones who make things exciting and live on the edge. They don't listen to authority and make their own rules. Melanie had her eyes on one of the bad boys, John. He was different. He wasn't boring. And the flaws he had she was sure she could fix. As abusers go, John was never holding back. From the time they started dating–and during the time they were married with two children–John did whatever he wanted, when he wanted. It is one thing to be abused, but quite another when there are children involved. Melanie shared this story to teach us about the warning signs using real-life, examples. It is up to us to remember this lesson. This is Melanie's story. NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part one of two parts with Amanda. This interview comes with all the trigger warnings. Amanda lives in Australia, but her story could have taken place anywhere in the world. The treatment Amanda and her twin sister (named J.J.) received as babies continued into their teen years. It is shocking, disturbing, inhumane, and, frankly, impossible to comprehend. But it is true, nonetheless.  This is Domestic Violence at its ugliest. The redeeming facet about Amanda’s story is how it never managed to break her. Her generous spirit can be witnessed here. She somehow was able to find a way to live through it all and took a heroic path in life. This is Amanda's story. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part three of three parts with Sabrina.   She met him in her freshman year of college. He was a senior. Was it love at first sight Maybe for her. Not for him. Jake had other ideas. This story is meant for parents with daughters in, or soon entering, college. It should be a time when they begin to take off in life and learn to find their way. But it be a time when they display their innocence and are easy prey for predators. Sabrina was a trusting young woman who put her life in the hands of a man who knew how to manipulate her until she had no power at all. The more she gave the more he took. We ask ourselves how these kinds of toxic/dangerous relationships take hold. We ask why a smart person doesn't just pick up and leave. This story will explain this from the POV of someone who still cannot understand how she had this happen to her.   This is Sabrina's story.   Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part two of three parts with Sabrina.   She met him in her freshman year of college. He was a senior. Was it love at first sight? Maybe for her. Not for him. Jake had other ideas. This story is meant for parents with daughters in, or soon entering, college. It should be a time when they begin to take off in life and learn to find their way. But it be a time when they display their innocence and are easy prey for predators. Sabrina was a trusting young woman who put her life in the hands of a man who knew how to manipulate her until she had no power at all. The more she gave the more he took. We ask ourselves how these kinds of toxic/dangerous relationships take hold. We ask why a smart person doesn't just pick up and leave. This story will explain this from the POV of someone who still cannot understand how she had this happen to her.   This is Sabrina's story.   Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is part one of three parts with Sabrina. She met him in her freshman year of college. He was a senior. Was it love at first sight? Maybe for her. Not for him. Jake had other ideas.  This story is meant for parents with daughters in, or soon entering, college. It should be a time when they begin to take off in life and learn to find their way. But it be a time when they display their innocence and are easy prey for predators.  Sabrina was a trusting young woman who put her life in the hands of a man who knew how to manipulate her until she had no power at all. The more she gave the more he took.  We ask ourselves how these kinds of toxic/dangerous relationships take hold. We ask why a smart person doesn't just pick up and leave. This story will explain this from the POV of someone who still cannot understand how she had this happen to her. This is Sabrina's story. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Serena offers to speak about the financial "bottomless pit" she was put in. We cover financial abuse in this episode. It's a subject that never gets enough airtime. Imagine, the one person her ex-husband took most advantage of? His own wife!  It was financial abuse to the max. She says: “I have not told my full story (other than to the police, federal investigators, divorce attorneys, and forensic accountants). But if telling my story can help others, I'm ready.” A summary of what her husband did: Serena was groomed from before they were married using sociopathic and narcissist strategies to obtain trust and expose her vulnerabilities. In short, he... 1. used her name and social security number to obtain credit cards while keeping a separate PO Box to hide it all, then switching the PO Box to her home after he was discovered. 2. used her information to apply for FAFSA loans while she was obtaining her doctorate He maxed out her student loans, then moved the money so it couldn't be traced, and laundered it. 3. hacked her retirement accounts. 4. cashed out joint investments for cash. 5. attempted to cash out the equity in their home in her name ($300K). She literally intercepted the mail with the signature sheet. 6. stole money from a nonprofit for orphans and invested it in his own name. 7. was likely doing the same thing to his mentally ill adult son. 8. lied, lied, lied (of course, he did). When he was discovered, he left the state and the rubble. She has been working to clean this up for the last three years with the help of great community members, therapists, strong friends, advisors, and grit! Did we mention her ex-husband was a minister? Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I get a lot of questions via email, Facebook, Instagram, and before and after speeches. I felt it a good idea to answer them for you in this episode. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I read Janine Latus's 336-page book, "If I Am Missing or Dead", years ago. I finished it in two days. It was that compelling a read. I reached out to her many times since then, and she has always answered me. She is so special. Janine has been called "...the most compelling speaker on sexual assault and relationship abuse I've ever heard." I believe that is spot on.  Why is that? She knows it because she has lived it. Janine has come face to face with domestic abuse starting as a young girl. As much as she tried for this not to happen to her again later in life, she ended up in an abusive relationship that nearly cost her her life. The most-cherished person in Janine's life, her sister Amy, also fell prey to domestic violence. Amy trusted a man who took complete advantage of her. They way Janine tells this will take your breath away. Janine Latus has given countless speeches before diverse audiences. She is nationally-known as a powerful force for bringing lifesaving information to those who need it most.  Set aside an hour and listen to this episode with Janine Latus. I promise you it will be time invested wisely. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Blair wrote me and said, “The more I listen to your podcast the more I feel compelled to share.” Blair grew up, in her words, “Surrounded and molded by the dysfunction of my parents' volatile dynamic.” She describes that time in her life, and you will feel it. Later, she suffered dating abuse only days after graduating high school. She details what it was like and how it felt. Like most victims, she was lured into this with careful manipulation and grooming. It lasted five years. Like all "DV" survivors, when she hit her breaking point, only then did she realize and commit to breaking free. There’s much to be gained by listening to Blair's story. She is another heroic survivor who is shining a bright light on what domestic violence is—and how she reclaimed herself. Today, Blair lives in a happy and healthy relationship surrounded by her husband, her two adorable children, and her dogs. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

"Sara" is a domestic violence survivor. She is also my cousin. Sara appeared to be in a perfect marriage. A nice home and three healthy boys. But her ex-husband eventually devolved into a serial abuser. She did all she could to coerce him into getting help, but nothing seemed to work. When living with this man became dangerous, she needed to break free.  Listen to a narrative of patience and courage. Sara took years before she could tell her story. We applaud her for sharing it with us on the WHEN DATING HURTS podcast.  Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On June 3, 2005, Detective Jim McGowan contacted me with knowledge about what happened to my daughter. Earlier that day, he interviewed Kristin's murderer, her ex-boyfriend, Nick. From that time until now, Nick has remained incarcerated.  Over the years, I've gained invaluable insights from Jim on why abusers do what they do and why abused women stay in dangerous relationships. Jim shares this and more in this WHEN DATING HURTS episode.  This is a "must-listen-to" episode for parents, friends, and families of women who are, or might be, in dating relationships. I am certain this episode will save someone's life. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We are fortunate to have dating abuse and domestic violence survivors identify our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast as a safe place to tell their stories of freedom. These successful escapes from horrible abuse are why listeners come to WHEN DATING HURTS for life-saving advice. It feels so good to know ascendance from abuse is attainable. MICHELE LOCKE This time, we are honored to listen to a different perspective. Michele Locke is a lawyer. She has also spent years as a judge who presiding over more than 5,000 cases involving families. She has seen it all and, at times, has felt she has seen too much. Listen to our important interview with lawyer and judge Michele Locke. This will dispell some of our myths about 'DV". If you have a unique viewpoint about dating abuse and domestic violence, this is the right place to join us and share with our listeners. NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Sheri Kurdakul is a domestic abuse survivor. There is nothing typical about the abuse she suffered. Like many survivors of abuse, her story is challenging to listen to, but there is much to be learned from her. Most survivors I've met tell of frequent times they were on the receiving end of despicable abuse. But they also speak about the inventive ways they endured and eventually overcame those circumstances. This is one of those stories. At first, you might feel sorry for Sheri, but later you will come to admire and celebrate her courage and a desire to rise above.  This is Sheri's story. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Karen Widdoss is a courageous survivor of a murderous assault suffered when she was a young teen.  In the summer of 1994, her ex-boyfriend attacked her and nearly took her life. How she managed to hold onto her life is miraculous.  Karen has added her voice to survivors of violent crimes by speaking out about her experiences so no other woman would ever suffer as she has.  In this episode, we talk about "Karen’s Law" which dramatically changes the way parole board hearings are handled. "Karen's Law" was passed on November 25, 2020 by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania.  Karen Widdoss has continually used her tragedy to dramatically help others in need.  Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I was urged to run this episode again. IT'S SO POWERFUL! One of our well-informed WHEN DATING HURTS listeners sent me an email with a list of things you must do before leaving your abuser. In this episode, you will hear about the kinds of items a domestic violence counselor will tell you while figuring out an escape plan to safety. This is a short episode but one of our most valuable. You might have a pen and paper handy so don't miss anything. Share this episode with friends and family who might need to hear it. You never know when someone is suffering in an unhealthy relationship today and needs to start preparing for a safe escape. Thank you for listening to our WHEN DATING HURTS podcast, Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com NOTE: If you are a survivor and want to share your story of abuse on the WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast, please email me: BillMitchell@WhenDatingHurts.com The WHEN DATING HURTS book (in paperback, eBook, and audiobook) can be found on Amazon. HELPFUL RESOURCES: • National Domestic Violence Hotline – The Hotline.org – Call 800-799-SAFE • LoveIsRespect – Call 866-331-9474 • RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) – RAINN.org – Call 800-656-4673 • SUICIDE HELPLINE: Call 988 DISCLAIMER: The WHEN DATING HURTS Podcast is providing this platform for information to be shared. We do not state with any certainty that anything is true or untrue. Understand that what you hear is the viewpoint of the people sharing. The information, opinions, and recommendations presented in this Podcast are for general information only. Any reliance on the information provided in this Podcast is done at your own risk. This Podcast should not be considered professional advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices