Unraveling Adoption – Details, episodes & analysis

"So the piece that I most resonate with the Dialectical Behavior Therapy is it's one of the therapies that really understands this core feeling of feeling overwhelmed and like you don't want to be alive." - Sharon Stein McNamara

EPISODE SUMMARY:

In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Sharon Stein McNamara, a licensed psychologist and adoption-competent therapist. Sharon, an adoptee herself, shared her personal journey and the profound impact of adoption on her life, particularly during her adolescent years when she faced suicidal thoughts after a breakup.

We delved into the complexities of adoption and how they can lead to feelings of self-loathing and overwhelming distress, especially among adoptees. Sharon introduced us to Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), a therapeutic approach that has been particularly effective for adopted adolescents and young adults. She explained how DBT incorporates mindfulness and distress tolerance skills, which are crucial for individuals who may feel their emotions are too intense to manage.

Throughout our conversation, Sharon emphasized the importance of recognizing and validating these feelings rather than dismissing them. She shared her own experiences with DBT and how it helped her and her clients navigate the challenges of attachment and self-worth. We discussed the significance of shifting core beliefs about oneself, especially for adoptees who may struggle with feelings of being unwanted or unworthy.

Sharon's insights provided hope and practical tools for families and individuals impacted by adoption. She encouraged listeners to never give up hope on adoptees, as the right support and understanding can lead to healing and growth.

I hope this episode resonates with anyone who has been touched by adoption or is seeking effective therapeutic tools to support themselves or their loved ones. Thank you for joining us, and please share this episode with anyone who might benefit from Sharon's expertise.

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📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL

📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar

✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing

💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX

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RESOURCES:

Sharon's information:

• Look up Sharon's website: Sharonsteinmcnamara.com

Other resources mentioned in this episode:

• Here's the book Sharon referenced: How to Break Your Addiction to a Person: When--and Why--Love Doesn't Work : https://www.amazon.com/Break-Your-Addiction-Person-When/dp/0553382497

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Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson

Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao

Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com

Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube

Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption

Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com

Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION

===============

Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you!

===============

TIME STAMPS

00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption
00:01:30 - Guest Introduction: Sharon Stein McNamara
00:02:00 - Sharon's Adoption Story
00:03:40 - Understanding DBT and Its Relevance
00:04:50 - The Importance of Distress Tolerance
00:06:30 - DBT vs. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
00:08:30 - Grounding Techniques in DBT
00:10:00 - Building Trust with Clients
00:10:30 - Working with Adoptees in Therapy
00:11:00 - Self-Loathing and Adoptee Experiences
00:12:30 - Personal Story: Overcoming Breakup Trauma
00:15:00 - The Impact of Attachment on Relationships
00:17:00 - DBT Skills for Managing Cravings
00:19:00 - The Role of Core Beliefs in Healing
00:21:00 - Finding a DBT-Trained Therapist
00:23:00 - Outcomes of DBT for Adoptees
00:25:00 - Final Thoughts and Resources
00:26:00 - Conclusion and Call to Action

"I was one of these slight skeptics; I was like, well I've been breathing all my life, what can breathwork do for me?" -- Kellan Bacon

Hear the transcript of this episode here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JKBNQJYFFZT18Z0XSMHHTH37

EPISODE SUMMARY:

In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Kellan Bacon, a gender-expansive, transracial adoptee from China, who was adopted as an infant in 1998 and now resides in Cardiff, Wales. Kellan has recently launched a professional practice called Kai Ming Holistics, where they utilize breathwork and other embodied modalities to support others on their healing journeys.

Kellan shared their personal adoption story, highlighting the complexities and challenges they faced growing up in a transracial family. They discussed the common narrative of being "saved" through adoption and how they eventually came to realize the profound impact of adoption trauma on their life. This awakening occurred during a mental health crisis around the age of 20, leading Kellan to explore their identity and the interconnectedness of their experiences as an adoptee and a queer individual.

We delved into the transformative power of breathwork, a healing modality that Kellan discovered during the COVID-19 pandemic. They explained how breathwork can help individuals access and process trauma stored in the body, particularly for adoptees who may have pre-verbal or pre-cognitive trauma. Kellan emphasized the importance of having a trained guide during breathwork sessions to ensure safety and support.

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📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL

📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar

✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing

💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX

===============

RESOURCES:

Kellan's information:

• Kellan's Substack: https://kellanbacon.substack.com/

• Find Kellan on Instagram both ways at: https://www.instagram.com/kaimingholistics/ AND/OR https://www.instagram.com/kellanbacon/

• Find Kellan on Facebook at: https://www.facebook.com/kellan.x.bacon

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Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson

Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao

Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com

Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube

Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption

Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com

Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION

===============

Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you!

===============

TIME STAMPS

00:00:00 - Welcome and Introduction
Introduction to the podcast and the host, Beth Syverson, along with her son Joey's journey.

00:01:05 - Meet Kellen Bacon
Introduction of guest Kellen Bacon, a transracial adoptee and breathwork practitioner.

00:01:48 - Kellen's Adoption Story
Kellen shares their adoption experience and the realization of adoption's impact.

00:03:15 - Coming Out of the Fog
Discussion on the awakening to adoption trauma and its effects on mental health.

00:04:30 - Transracial Adoption Experience
Kellen discusses growing up as a transracial adoptee and the challenges faced.

00:06:04 - Exploring Gender Identity
Kellen talks about their journey of coming to terms with their gender identity.

00:07:01 - The Intersection of Identities
Discussion on how various aspects of identity intertwine and impact personal growth.

00:08:34 - COVID and Breathwork
Kellen shares how COVID led them to discover breathwork as a healing modality.

00:10:01 - Understanding Breathwork
Explanation of breathwork and its unique approach to healing trauma.

00:11:08 - Demonstration of Breathwork
Kellen provides a brief demonstration of breathwork techniques.

00:12:24 - Safety in Breathwork
Discussion on the importance of having a guide during breathwork sessions.

00:15:09 - Breathwork for Adoptees
Exploration of how breathwork can specifically benefit adoptees dealing with trauma.

00:16:39 - Trauma in the Body
Kellen explains how trauma is stored in the body and the importance of somatic healing.

00:19:30 - Kellen's Offerings
Information on Kellen's practice, including support groups for trans-adoptees.

00:20:20 - Root Cause Healing
Introduction to root cause therapy and its significance in addressing limiting beliefs.

00:22:26 - Kellen's Journey and Age
Discussion on Kellen's age and their deep work in healing and therapy.

00:23:30 - Closing Thoughts
Final remarks on the importance of breathwork and resources for adoptees.

"I...sometimes I forget that I'm Asian unless I see myself in a mirror." -- Nathan Nowack

Read the Transcript: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JEAFSD4KFY07AFGENGAPDN7A

EPISODE SUMMARY:

In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Nathan Nowack, a Korean adoptee, professional photographer, and co-host of The Janchi Show. Nathan shared his adoption story, having been adopted from Korea at just five and a half months old and raised in a predominantly white community in Oklahoma. He reflected on his childhood, noting the lack of cultural representation and the challenges of navigating his Asian identity in a world that often sees him as different.

We discussed the complexities of transracial adoption, including the impact of his parents' approach to race and culture. Nathan emphasized the importance of understanding and acknowledging one's racial identity, especially in a society that often overlooks these nuances. He shared his experiences with microaggressions and the emotional toll they can take on adoptees, highlighting the need for greater awareness and sensitivity.

Nathan also spoke about his involvement with KAAN (Korean American Adoptee Adoptive Family Network) and how connecting with other adoptees has been instrumental in his healing journey. He described the sense of community he found there and the importance of sharing diverse adoption stories, acknowledging that each experience is unique.

As a father of three multiple-ethnicity children, Nathan is committed to helping them understand their cultural heritage. He shared how he incorporates Asian traditions and celebrations into their lives, ensuring they have a strong sense of identity.

This conversation was rich with insights into the complexities of adoption, identity, and community. I hope listeners find Nathan's story as inspiring and enlightening as I did. Be sure to check out The Janchi Show and connect with Nathan on Instagram for more of his journey and perspectives. Thank you for joining us, and I look forward to our next episode!

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📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL

📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar

✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing

💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX

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RESOURCES:

Nathan's information:

• Find Nathan on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nnowack/

• Check out Nathan's Podcast: www.janchishow.com and https://www.instagram.com/janchishow/

• Find out more about KAAN: www.wearekaan.org and https://www.instagram.com/wearekaan/

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Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson

Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao

Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com

Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube

Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption

Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com

Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION

===============

Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you!

===============

TIME STAMPS:

00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption
Welcome to the podcast and introduction of host Beth Syverson and guest Nathan Nowack.

00:01:26 - Nathan's Adoption Story
Nathan shares his background as a Korean adoptee raised in a predominantly white environment.

00:02:50 - Cultural Representation in Upbringing
Discussion on the lack of Asian cultural representation in Nathan's childhood.

00:03:50 - Transracial Adoption and Parental Awareness
Nathan reflects on his adoptive parents' understanding of transracial adoption.

00:05:32 - The Melting Pot Mentality
Exploration of the "colorblind" approach to race and its implications for Nathan.

00:06:52 - Microaggressions and Identity
Nathan discusses experiences with microaggressions and their impact on his identity.

00:08:38 - Community and Connection
The importance of finding community among other adoptees for support and understanding.

00:09:18 - Involvement with KAAN
Nathan explains his role in the Korean American Adoptee Adoptive Family Network (KAAN).

00:10:56 - Upcoming KAAN Conference
Details about the next KAAN conference and its themes.

00:11:41 - Healing Through Shared Stories
How connecting with other adoptees aids in Nathan's healing journey.

00:12:30 - The Complexity of Adoption Stories
Discussion on the varied experiences of adoptees and the ongoing nature of loss.

00:13:44 - Reunion with Biological Family
Nathan shares his experience of reuniting with his biological siblings.

00:15:17 - Communication Challenges with Siblings
The difficulties of connecting with his siblings due to language barriers.

00:16:37 - Sibling Trauma and Adoption
Exploration of the trauma experienced by Nathan's siblings regarding his adoption.

00:17:45 - Parenting Mixed-Race Children
Nathan discusses raising his children with awareness of their diverse heritage.

00:19:15 - Cultural Education for Children
How Nathan incorporates Asian culture and representation into his children's lives.

00:20:37 - Food and Cultural Connection
Nathan's love for food and how it connects him to his heritage and family.

00:21:50 - Living Through His Children
Reflections on how Nathan experiences his own identity through his children's upbringing.

00:22:45 - Closing Thoughts and Resources
Nathan expresses gratitude for the opportunity to share his story and offers ways to connect.

This week's Unraveling Adoption podcast episode is unique because I am traveling to an adoption conference the week before this episode's release. So instead of editing a regular episode, I put together a short behind-the-scenes episode, highlighting all the things we offer to adoptive families and the larger community.

In this week's Unraveling Adoption podcast, Beth talks with Kevin Burgart from the Nashville area. He's an adoptee, adoptive parent of two children with significant special needs, and recently he became the adoptive parent of his grandchild as well. Since Kevin has been on both sides of this equation, he has a unique perspective on adoption. His life has been more challenging than most in many ways. We will dig into the obstacles he's faced, and talk about what resources he's found to help him cope. 

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📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar

💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX

===============

RESOURCES:

Kevin's information:

• Find Kevin on Facebook : https://www.facebook.com/kevin.burgart.1 

Helpful resources mentioned in this episode:

• The Primal Wound by Nancy Verrier: https://amzn.to/40bfXX0

• Journey of the Adopted Self by Betty Jean Lifton: https://amzn.to/42RZLMj

• Adoptees On podcast with Haley Radke: https://www.adopteeson.com/

Other Resources:

• APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption's Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude

• Other Parents Like Me -  https://www.facebook.com/other.parents.like.me

• Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents of Addicted Teens: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/

• Find a Tele-Therapist: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/online-counseling

===============

Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson

Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao

Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com

Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube

Support UnravelingAdoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption

www.UnravelingAdoption.com

===============

TIME STAMPS:

  1:22 Kevin's adoption story and childhood

  2:53 How adoption affected Kevin's teen years with emotional and behavioral issues 

  3:38 The start of Kevin's search for his biological family, then blocked for 41 years

  6:24 Adoptive parents were loving and helpful with search 

  8:04 New research about biological family in 1991, more falsehoods, adoptees beware!

  9:21 Registration with databases, a few teasers

10:20 Finally received birth certificate after 48 years, but all his parents were gone by then

12:45 Pursuing other family members through DNA, expectation v. reality

17:35 Does Kevin feel "lucky" to escape being raised by his birth family?

19:05 Connections with Kevin's 15 bio siblings

21:52 Deciding to adopt older children with special needs

24:10 Disruptions and chaos with adopted siblings

27:20 Major struggles with adopted son because of so much trauma in his life

33:55 Adopting their son's infant child

37:30 How Kevin reckons with parenting these troubled children

39:00 Resources that have helped Kevin, and advice for adoptees in search

In this week's Unraveling Adoption podcast, Beth talks with Cindy Olson McQuay, an adoptee from Pennsylvania who is the co-founder, with Erin Cosentino, of Hiraeth Healing Retreats for Adoptees, DCPs (Donor Conceived People), LDAs (Late Discovery Adoptees), and NPEs (Not Parent Expected). Cindy is a baby scoop era domestic infant adoptee, and she had a rather idyllic childhood with well-informed and open adoptive parents, which was somewhat unusual at the time.  Besides her work for Hiraeth, she advocates for adoption law reform and educates the public about separation trauma. 

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📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar

💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX

===============

RESOURCES:

Cindy's information:

• Hiraeth Hope & Healing Retreats: https://www.hiraethhopeandhealing.com/

• Email: info@hiraethhopeandhealing.com
  

Other things mentioned in this episode:

• The Chosen Baby book from Cindy's childhood: https://amzn.to/3FwgCdn

• The Girls Who Went Away by Ann Fessler: https://amzn.to/3JNM35j

• InterCountry Adoptee Voices (ICAV) with Lynelle Long: https://intercountryadopteevoices.com/
  

Other Resources:

• APtitude: A Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption's Challenges - UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude

• Other Parents Like Me -  https://www.facebook.com/other.parents.like.me

• Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents of Addicted Teens: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/

• Find a Tele-Therapist: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/online-counseling

===============

Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson

Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao

Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com

Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube

Support UnravelingAdoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption

www.UnravelingAdoption.com

===============

TIME STAMPS:

  1:25 Cindy's adoption story and childhood

  6:40 Cindy's search for her birth family

10:35 Does a "good adoption" preclude adoption trauma?

15:44 What prompted Cindy to become an adoption activist and search angel?

16:58 Adoption v. Guardianship

18:46 The problems with intercountry adoption and surrogacy

21:49 What is Hiraeth Hope & Healing?

25:25 The overlaps between adoptees, LDAs, DCPs, and NPEs

27:03 What do people experience at Hiraeth retreats? 

31:40 Scholarships ARE available! And help them find mansions to host these retreats 

35:17 Advice for non-adoptees and adoptive parents

In this week's Unraveling Adoption podcast, Beth talks with Greg Gentry, a domestic baby scoop era adoptee, born in California in 1969. He has been in reunion with maternal family members since 2006, and in 2021 also connected with his paternal side. Greg is a facilitator and interviewer for Fireside Adoptees, a private Facebook group founded in 2021, which is committed to additional outreach through its Fireside Adoptees public Facebook page and the Fireside Adoptees Constellation private Facebook group. Greg is also an administrator and facilitator within the Adoption Trauma Network and a leader for the New Hampshire chapter of Adoptees Connect. He enjoys connecting with others in the online adoptee community, and has found these interactions to be richly rewarding and supportive.

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📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar

💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX

===============

RESOURCES:

Greg's information:

• Greg on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/greggentry22/

• Greg on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100070242835691

• Fireside Adoptees private Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1411791922534076

• Fireside Adoptees Constellation & Legislation private Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/616673970200012

• Adoption Trauma Network: https://www.facebook.com/groups/adoptiontrauma

• Adoptees Connect: https://adopteesconnect.com/

Other Resources:

• APtitude: A Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption's Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude

• Other Parents Like Me -  https://www.facebook.com/other.parents.like.me

• Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents of Addicted Teens: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/

• Find a Tele-Therapist: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/online-counseling

===============

Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson

Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao

Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com

Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube

Support UnravelingAdoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption

www.UnravelingAdoption.com

===============

TIME STAMPS:

  2:26 Greg's adoption story and childhood

  9:30 Greg's first blood relative he met - the importance of mirroring

11:50 The pros and cons of open adoption

13:50 Greg's reunion experiences

19:10 "Coming out of the fog"

25:45 How Fireside Adoptees helped Greg transition out of the fog

32:00 Adoption Trauma Network description

34:50 What makes Adoptees Connect so special?

43:20 Greg's advice to adoptive parents

In this week's Unraveling Adoption podcast, Beth talks with Kelsay Elizabeth Myers, a professional writer, artist, and somatic movement educator living in Marin County, CA. She is passionate about personal and social transformation for trauma healing. She's a Korean transnational adoptee who has been on a healing journey the last several years, after spending the first 32 years of her life in self-destructive behavior patterns.

Kelsay founded Dialogical Persona Healing Arts where she offers individual and group coaching programs and online courses that use expressive arts and transformational processes to help others discover new ways of understanding themselves, reclaim their creative flow and feel more settled in their whole system, so they, too can experience more power, excitement, and joy in life. She is currently a Ph.D student of Transformative Inquiry at California Institute of Integral Studies where she uses a variety of psychological approaches and arts-based research practices for trauma integration and wholeness. 

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💌 Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX

===============

RESOURCES:

Kelsay's information:

• Kelsay's website: DialogicalPersona.com

• Kelsay's podcast (co-host with Leela Davis): What I Didn't Tell My Therapist: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/what-i-didnt-tell-my-therapist-reboot/id1473447399

Other things mentioned in this episode:

• Tamalpa Institute: https://www.tamalpa.org/

• The Body Keeps the Score: https://amzn.to/3yumsYZ

Other Resources :

• APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption's Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude

• Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com 

• Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/

• Adoptee-Therapist Directory: https://growbeyondwords.com/adoptee-therapist-directory/

===============

Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson

Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao

Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com

Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube

Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption

www.UnravelingAdoption.com

===============

TIME STAMPS:

  2:00 Kelsay's adoption story and childhood, including racist microaggressions and bullying

  4:58 Kelsay's racial identity

  7:20 Which was worse, racial trauma or adoption trauma?

10:40 How Kelsay's trauma manifested in abusive relationships

13:20 Intuitively realizing her sexual abuse in foster care through her "felt sense"

15:26 Conscious dancing to begin her healing journey

18:05 Kelsay's training in somatic movement healing modalities

22:45 How somatic movement has helped Kelsay deal with racism triggers

24:39 Somatic movement to help kids

27:37 Autoimmune conditions and somatic movement

30:57 Our culture's mind/body split

32:05 Kelsay's advice for transracial/intercountry adoptive parents

In this week's Unraveling Adoption podcast, Beth talks with Simon Benn, an adoptee living near York, England and host of Thriving Adoptees podcast. I was recently on his show, so I wanted him to be on our show as well. Trading podcasts across the globe. Simon has been on a healing journey for the last 13 or so years, after a discovery about his adoption that rocked his world. He wants to help other adoptees move toward healing with his podcast and webinars.

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💌 Sign up for Unraveling Adoption's email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX

===============

RESOURCES:

Simon's information:

• Simon's podcast Thriving Adoptees: https://thriving-adoptees.simplecast.com/

• Beth's episode on Thriving Adoptees: https://thriving-adoptees.simplecast.com/episodes/personal-growth-with-adoptive-mom-beth-syverson

• Simon's recent Healing My Primal Wound webinar: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bnz7I7V_IOQ

Other resource mentioned in this episode:

• Rupert Spira: https://rupertspira.com/

More Resources:

• APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption's Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude

• Other Parents Like Me -  https://www.facebook.com/other.parents.like.me

• Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents of Addicted Teens: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/

• Find a Tele-Therapist: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/online-counseling

===============

Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson

Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao

Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com

Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube

Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption

www.UnravelingAdoption.com

===============

TIME STAMPS:

  1:18 Simon's adoption story and childhood

  4:14 What Simon's adoption file revealed about his birth mother

  7:35 Revelations and epiphanies

10:05 What is the primal wound? What is wounded? Simon's new metaphor

18:55 There's no such thing as a second-hand insight

21:23 Simon's advice for adoptees coming "out of the fog"

25:05 Simon reading his poems "Beneath" and "After the Fog"

In this week's Safe Home Podcast, Beth talks with Amanda Kari McHugh, an adoptee and an engagement journalist who is making her mark on the adoption community with her project Voices of Adoption which you can find on TikTok, Instagram, and Substack. In this project she elevates the voices of adoptees and birth mothers. 

Stay tuned for ways you might be able to participate in this project! 

Amanda is pursuing a double masters in journalism and engagement from grad school at the Craig Newmark Graduate School of Journalism at CUNY.  She hopes to be a resource to help other adoptees and also to help other journalists find good adoption data.

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💌 Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX

===============

RESOURCES:

Amanda's information:

• Voices of Adoption on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@voicesofadoption

• Voices of Adoption on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/_voicesofadoption/

• Voices of Adoption on Substack: https://voicesofadoption.substack.com/

• Abortion/Adoption video collage that Amanda created: https://www.instagram.com/p/CdtUQEfj5dl/

Other resources mentioned in this episode:

• Academia.edu: https://www.academia.edu/

• Boolean Search Terms: https://www.lifewire.com/boolean-search-terms-google-1616810

• Desiree Stevens and Access Connecticut: https://www.facebook.com/AccessConnecticut/

Other Resources:

• Other Parents Like Me -  https://www.facebook.com/other.parents.like.me

• Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents of Addicted Teens: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/

• Find a Tele-Therapist: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/online-counseling

===============

Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson

Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao

Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com

Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube

Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption

www.UnravelingAdoption.com

===============

TIME STAMPS:

  1:25 Amanda's adoption story and childhood

  4:25 Kudos to Amanda's school counselor for knowing about adoption-competent therapists

  5:50 Amanda's attachment style is complicated

  7:09 How lack of family medical history impacts adoptees

10:00 Advocating for adoption reform and dealing with pushback

12:00 Blasting apart adoption myths, getting people angry at her

14:35 Pushback has improved Amanda's reporting

15:20 Where does Amanda find adoption data? Who keeps track of "goods transferred?"

18:50 Privacy laws - are they a farce?

20:00 The Yelp of adoption agency databases idea

20:44 Voices of Adoption on TikTok and Instagram 

22:38 Objectivity is a myth but we can try to understand the other points of view

24:11 What exactly is engagement journalism? 

25:00 "Domestic supply of infants" necessitated discussion about adoption and abortion 

27:12 Amanda's TikTok video (audio only)

29:25 The aftermath of the viral video

32:37 How the Voices of Adoption on Substack will create community-sourced resources

35:50 Amanda's dream for collective members to get paid for their emotional labor 

39:09 How to participate in Amanda's projects and join the Voices of Adoption community

41:04 The importance of moderators in social media

44:11 How we can share our stories safely and authentically to help people coming out of the fog