Explore every episode of the podcast The Stay or Go Podcast for Women Considering Divorce
| Title | Pub. Date | Duration | |
|---|---|---|---|
| What Every Woman Deserves to Know with Quinn Otrera | 09 Jun 2026 | 01:32:41 | |
Episode 110: Hello, hello, babes! 💕 Oh my goodness, my heart is so incredibly full because the beautiful Yin to my Yang—the gorgeous, brilliant Quinn—is officially BACK! 🥰 It feels just like the good old days, vibing out together and diving straight into the deep end. For this episode, Quinn and I really took one for the team. We spent weeks digging into the meaty, mind-blowing work of historian Gerda Lerner’s The Creation of Patriarchy, and let me tell you... once you see the matrix, you cannot unsee it. 😲 If you are sitting there considering divorce, feeling psychologically exhausted, or constantly wondering, "Am I the crazy one?"—please take a deep breath right now. 😮💨 This episode is your permission slip to stop blaming yourself. We are breaking down how the world was artificially engineered by men, for men, and why we internalize these thousands-of-years-old systems as personal failures. Quinn and I are tracking the whole trajectory, from ancient Mother Goddess worship to the "Genesis hit job" that flipped the script on our power. 🐍 Here is what we are unpacking:
This isn't about doing to men what they did to us—it’s about waking up to true mutuality and stepping off the stage of a play we didn't write. 🛑 When we band together in true sisterhood and refuse to play our assigned, supportive roles, the patriarch's play finally comes to an end. 👭💥 Please send this episode to your sisters, your besties, and your moms. We need to know our history so we don't fall for the ploy again! If you are looking for your ultimate "girls' girls" community to hold you through this fog, we are waiting for you! ✨ Text "stay or go community" to 33777 to join us. Plus, Quinn is back doing her legendary tarot readings in the community this summer (jaws are dropping, babes, so don't ask what you don't want to know! 🔮). 1:1 90-minute coaching links are below. I love you, I see you, and we will see you next week! Sending so much love. 💖🛋️ Show Notes: Extra ✨bonus✨ material can be found on Substack for my paid subscribers. Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive The Creation of Patriarchy PDF - Gerda Lerner The Creation of Feminist Consciousness - Gerda Lerner | |||
| When Life Takes Us Places We Didn’t Expect: The Hard Truth of Admitting It’s Not Working | 02 Jun 2026 | 01:34:09 | |
Episode 109: Hello, my loves. Welcome back. Today’s episode is a deeply personal, vulnerable, and ultimately liberating one for me. For the past eight months, I have been spinning in a messy internal loop, trying to force a business model that just wasn’t working. Instead of looking at the numbers cleanly, my conditioning told me I just needed to try harder, surrender more, and carry the entire weight of the world on my shoulders. If you are currently considering divorce, this loop probably sounds incredibly familiar. So often, we look inward and blame ourselves for a failing marriage, believing that walking away means we can’t trust our own judgment or that we have failed as the emotional anchors of our families. After a beautifully raw reality check with my coach, Quinn, I finally embraced a truth I want to hand to you today: it is not a sin, it is just data. In this episode, I’m sharing the messy journey behind my major decision to remove the paywall and return the podcast to a completely free, open resource for everyone, permanently. We are diving into the trap of hyper-independence, shedding old conditioning, and learning how to pivot in a rebellious act of self-love. ✨ Paid subscribers, listen in for the exciting details on how your investment is shifting into monthly live coaching and deep-dive resources straight from The Vault! ❤️ Show Notes: The "Click Clack Symphony" Video The Human Design Episode with Deanna The Creation of Patriarchy - Gerda Lerner The Creation of Feminist Consciousness - Gerda Lerner The Light Seers Tarot Deck - Eight of Cups Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| 100th Episode Milestone & Why We Pass Pain Forward (and How to Stop) | 24 Mar 2026 | 01:23:00 | |
Episode 100: This 100th episode is a celebration, yes, but it is also something deeper. In it I reflect on what it means to reach this milestone and on the woman I have become in the process of creating this podcast. What started as a small spark during one of the hardest seasons of my life has grown into something that has not only supported other women, but has changed me too. At the heart of this episode is also a question I have been sitting with lately. What do we do with the pain we have lived through? Do we let it harden us, or do we let it deepen us? Through two very different experiences, one painful and one tender, I talk about what it means to be with our own fear, grief, and hurt instead of projecting it onto everyone around us. I talk about emotional maturity, self-resourcing, and the kind of self-love that is not performative, but rooted in staying with ourselves in the hardest places. If you are considering divorce, this matters. Because so much of what keeps us stuck is not just the relationship itself, but the emotional patterns underneath it. And so much of healing is learning how to hold your own inner world with honesty and care. This episode is really about transmuting darkness. About choosing, again and again, to let what has hurt you become a source of compassion, clarity, and truth rather than something you pass on. And in that way, this episode feels like the heart of what these 100 episodes have always been about. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack For Better or For Worse: Divorce Reconsidered - E. Mavis Hetherington Ph.D Script for Jungian dream interpretation: Hello Claude! I've done Jungian dream interpretation with a psychiatrist before who took me step-by-step through each aspect of the dream, one at one at a time, asking questions and getting details along the way and really slowing the process down. I'd like to have you do the same with me and the dream I'm about to share with you please. (copy and paste dream here and then submit ) The Muse Tarot - Chris-Anne Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Unmanaged Complex PTSD: How It Affects Your Life & Relationships | 27 Feb 2024 | 00:52:21 | |
Episode 11: Hey loves! 🥰 Just me and Jake, chilling at home today, feeling so refreshed after the sweetest birthday getaway in Deep Ellum, Dallas. (Side note: thrift shopping with someone you're dating? 10/10 recommend — cuteness overload! 🛍️✨) But here’s the real magic I really want to share with you… This episode is all about Complex PTSD — why accepting that I have it has been the most profound gift I’ve given myself this year. It’s the book that opened my eyes: Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker—if you resonate with anything I share today, go get it. Trust. 🚀 Here's What We're Unpacking:
Silver Linings and Sacred Shifts:
The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Repressed Memories and Childhood Trauma | 20 Feb 2024 | 00:53:24 | |
Episode 10: In this episode I'll share my journey with repressed memories and how unveiling these anhis episode is one of the hardest—and most important—I’ve ever recorded. 💔 Today, I’m sharing something deeply personal: my experience with repressed memories of childhood sexual abuse, how those memories resurfaced, and the journey that followed as I began to piece together the truth about my past. This is a raw, real, and sacred conversation about trauma, silence, and what it means to believe yourself when the world tries to gaslight you. 💬🔥 I want to say this clearly: this episode comes with a strong content consideration. If you’ve experienced childhood abuse or are in the process of trauma healing, please go gently with yourself while listening. Pause when you need. Feel into your body. You are not alone. You are not crazy. And you are deeply loved. 💞 In this episode, I share: I also get into how childhood trauma shaped my nervous system, why complex PTSD (CPTSD) has been such a breakthrough in understanding myself, and how reclaiming my own truth led me to one of the most defining moments of my life—testifying against my father in court. ⚖️ This episode isn’t easy, but it’s honest. It’s for the woman who needs to know she’s not imagining things. For the woman who remembers something but isn’t sure what it means. For the one who’s been told she’s “making it up.” I see you. And I believe you. 🫶 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Own Your Story | 06 Feb 2024 | 00:33:57 | |
Episode 9: This episode… wow. It’s tender, it’s raw, and it might just be the thing you didn’t know you needed. 💗 I’m sharing the power of storytelling—not the kind you read in books, but the kind you live and breathe every day. The kind that defines who you believe yourself to be. Because here’s the truth: if you’re not the one writing your story, someone else will try to do it for you. 🖊️ This idea came alive during a beautiful coaching session with a dear friend and former client. She’s walking through one of the hardest seasons of her life—a journey with cancer—and yet the way she’s reframed her experience using the “mindset of storytelling” completely blew me away. 🌿 In this episode, I share: I also get super real about my own journey—how I grew up in a religious system that handed me a life script I didn’t question until I was falling apart. How I believed being a “good wife” was the ultimate success... and how breaking that story was both painful and absolutely necessary. 🧩 This episode is for any woman who’s stuck in a story that no longer fits. Maybe it was handed to you by religion, culture, family, or fear. Maybe it’s a story that tells you you're bad, broken, or selfish for wanting more. I'm here to tell you—you get to rewrite that. Not someday. Right now. 🪞 You have the right to choose a story that lifts you, heals you, and reflects who you truly are—not who someone else needed you to be. The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Embrace Your One-of-a-Kind Journey | 30 Jan 2024 | 00:28:43 | |
Episode 8: This episode hit me right in the heart, y’all. 💖 It was born from one of those real-life, late-night scroll moments (you know the kind). One second I’m chilling, decompressing... and the next, I’m spiraling into comparison. The shame storm was real. 😔 But then, a thought dropped in like a whisper from the universe: "Okay, you want her success? Then you also get her life." That flipped everything. It reminded me that behind every seemingly perfect feed is a life I don’t actually know—and one I probably wouldn’t trade for my own if I really had the choice. 💡 In this episode, we talk about: I share the truth about what it's been like building my life from the inside out—not always glamorous, not always visible—but full of hard-won joy, expanded worldview, and soul-level growth. This isn’t about pretending your life is perfect. It’s about recognizing that it’s yours, and that’s what makes it beautiful. 🌸 Plus, I offer tangible ways you can reconnect with your own sacred path, including some of my most treasured resources like Sarah Blondin (hello soul medicine) and Women Who Run With the Wolves (life-changing doesn’t even cover it). 📚✨ So if you’ve been stuck in compare-and-despair or questioning your worth because of what someone else’s highlight reel looks like—this episode is here to bring you home to yourself. 💕 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Guilt Keeps You Trapped in Indecision. Let It Go. | 23 Jan 2024 | 00:25:11 | |
Episode 7: Whew, this one goes deep, y’all. 💥 If you’re an empathic, heart-centered woman (hello, most of us!) who’s staying in a marriage because you don’t want to hurt your partner… this episode is a loving wake-up call. 💔✨ I’m breaking down how guilt—especially the guilt we’ve been trained to carry—keeps us spinning in confusion and stuck in marriages that no longer align with our truth. And let’s be honest: most of us were raised in patriarchal systems that taught us to prioritize everyone else’s comfort over our own clarity. 😩 In this episode, we’ll dive into: I’ll also share my own personal stories (including some seriously ✨Taylor Swift “Blank Space” vibes✨ from my dating life) to show how this stuff plays out in real time—and why it’s so freeing to stop carrying responsibility for other people’s reactions. Here’s your permission slip, friend: you get to make the right choice for YOU, even if it disappoints someone else. You are not selfish. You are sovereign. 💪💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Why I Am a "Stay or Go Coach" Rather Than a Divorce Coach | 16 Jan 2024 | 00:25:00 | |
Episode 6: Let’s clear something up, loves. 💬 If you’ve been listening to the first few episodes and thinking, “Wait… is Britta just Team Divorce?” — this one’s for you. 💡 In this episode, I share the real reason I call myself a Stay or Go coach—not a divorce coach—and why that distinction is everything. Because here’s the truth: I’m not here to tell you what to do. I’m here to help you find your own truth, without pressure, fear, or someone else’s agenda. 🔍✨ We talk about: I also share a client story that had me cheering from the sidelines 🙌—a reminder that staying can work when you’ve done the inner work and built a marriage that actually supports your thriving. Whether you're leaning toward staying, going, or feel like you’re just trying to breathe… this episode is an invitation to come home to yourself, slow down, and choose with clarity—not fear. 💖 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Considering Divorce? Understand the Life-Death-Life Cycle First | 09 Jan 2024 | 00:44:33 | |
Episode 5: This episode is one for your soul, babe. It’s a cozy, late-night chat straight from my heart to yours—and it might just be the perspective shift you didn’t know you needed. 💫 We're diving deep into a truth that changed everything for me: the Life-Death-Life Cycle, inspired by Clarissa Pinkola Estés’ iconic Women Who Run With the Wolves. 🌑🌱 If you’re sitting in the messy middle of your marriage, wrestling with grief, fear, or the unknown… this one’s for you. Here’s what we explore: We talk gardens, burning man, breakups, soul awakenings, intuitive knowing—and why surrendering to death is actually the beginning of your next becoming. 🔥 If you've been holding on to something that no longer fits… a relationship, a belief, a way of life… this episode will help you loosen your grip and start trusting the part of you that already knows what’s next. 🌕✨ The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Breaking Free: Challenging the 50-Year Marriage Myth | 09 Jan 2024 | 00:29:38 | |
Episode 4: Okay babes, we need to talk about something BIG. This episode is for every woman who’s ever been told that a “successful” marriage means staying together for 50 years, no matter how miserable you are. 🧨💔 Today, I’m cracking open the marriage myth so many of us were raised with—especially those of us from religious or traditional backgrounds. I get raw about my own journey from Mormon wife to divorced woman reclaiming her voice… and why I believe the goal of a “forever” marriage needs a major update. 🧬🔥 Inside this episode, we dig into: You’ll also hear: Plus, I’m calling out outdated beliefs about sex, intimacy, and gender roles 👀 and showing you how doing your inner work before divorce changes EVERYTHING about what comes next. 💃📖 If you've ever thought, “I can’t imagine doing this for 10 more years... let alone 50,” then love—you need this episode. This is your permission slip to reimagine what partnership can look like. 💫
The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Feeling Stuck? Three Kick-Ass Tips That Help While Considering Divorce | 10 Dec 2023 | 00:28:20 | |
Episode 3: Hey babes—if you’ve been swimming in indecision, overthinking everything, or just feeling totally frozen about whether to stay or go, this is your episode. 🧊➡️🔥 Today, I’m breaking down three foundational tools that I teach every client in the early stages of working together—and I promise, even just one of these can help you start shaking off that stuck, heavy energy. Think of it like a little soul defibrillator. 💓⚡ Inside this episode, we’ll unpack: Plus, I’m getting fired up about: So if you’ve been carrying beliefs like “I’ll ruin my kids” or “I won’t survive financially,” I’m giving you a framework to question the hell out of those lies and start reclaiming your power. This one’s direct, actionable, and spicy as hell. 🌶️💪 You deserve to feel clear. You deserve to feel whole. You deserve to feel free—and it starts here. Let’s do this. 💫 Links and show notes for this episode. The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Welcome to the Podcast, Take TWO! | 09 Dec 2023 | 00:20:05 | |
Episode 2: Okay y’all… this episode is raw, real, and straight from the heart. 💓 You’re about to hear the wild time gap between Episodes 1 and 2—yep, these two were recorded a year and a half apart—and honestly, I wouldn’t have it any other way. 🌀 In this catch-up episode, I take you behind the scenes of a year that cracked me open in ways I never saw coming… losing my mom 💔, uncovering devastating truths about my past 🫣, walking through deep trauma recovery, and rediscovering myself in the middle of it all. It’s vulnerable AF, but also so full of power. We talk about: This episode is your reminder that growth doesn’t always look glamorous. Sometimes it means going quiet, turning inward, and letting yourself feel it all. Sometimes it means letting go of who you were so you can step fully into who you're becoming. 🌱 If you’ve been stuck in perfectionism, holding back, or waiting for the “right time” to move forward—this one’s for you. 💥 Press play, breathe deep, and come along with me. This podcast is gonna get loud, spicy, sacred, and SO real. Let’s go. 💫
The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| The Courage to Leave and Rebuild From the Roots with Vanessa Kulick Price | 17 Mar 2026 | 01:24:52 | |
Episode 99: This week, I’m joined by the incredible Vanessa Kulick Price for a conversation that goes straight to the heart of what so many women are living through beneath the surface of divorce. We talk about childhood trauma, grief, alcoholism, sobriety, motherhood, narcissistic dynamics, and the long process of learning how to come home to yourself. Vanessa shares so beautifully about what it means to finally name what is happening, to trust your own experience, and to begin building a life that feels deeply true from the inside out. What I loved most about this conversation is how honest it is. This is not a polished story about healing. It is real, tender, hard won, and full of wisdom. We talk about the parallels between restoring land, restoring a home, and restoring yourself after years of disconnection. We talk about self-love, boundaries, and the slow, powerful work of regeneration. This episode is for the woman who knows something is not right, even if she cannot fully name it yet. It is for the woman who is learning to trust herself again. And it is a reminder that a life on the other side of survival is possible. A life with more peace, more truth, and more of you in it. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Some of Britta’s Favorite Posts: Slow down, Simplify and Invite Spaciousness I Built an LLC—And a Life I’m Still Reaching Toward A House Update: Heat, Trust, and Beaver Medicine Sky, Hawk, Horse and Stone: Rediscovering Self by Reconnecting to Earth’s Ancient Medicines Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Welcome to The Stay or Go Podcast | 08 Dec 2023 | 00:20:54 | |
Episode 1: Hey loves! 💕 I can’t even tell you how freaking excited I am to be launching this podcast — it’s been a dream in the making, and now it’s finally here! 🎉 In this first episode, I’m pulling back the curtain and sharing my journey — from growing up in a deeply religious household, getting married at 19, to waking up one day in a life that looked “perfect” on the outside but felt empty on the inside. 💔 This is the story of how I reclaimed my voice, found therapy, discovered coaching, and ultimately made the brave choice to rebuild a life that’s actually mine. 🔥 You’ll also get the scoop on what this podcast is all about — we’re here to question EVERYTHING you thought you knew about divorce 🙅♀️, let go of fear-based narratives, and step into your power with clarity and courage. Whether you stay or go, my goal is the same: for you to love the life you’re living. 💫 This is for the woman who feels stuck, confused, afraid, or overwhelmed. You're not alone — and you don’t have to figure it all out today. But girl, you do deserve to feel lit up and fully alive in your own story. 🦋
The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| 3 Things Every Woman Needs to Finally Trust Herself While Considering Divorce | 10 Mar 2026 | 01:18:46 | |
Episode 98: This week, I want to talk about something that sits underneath almost every conversation I have with women who are considering divorce. It’s the question beneath the question. Not just should I stay or go, but something deeper.Can I trust myself? So many women come into this space looking for certainty. They want to know they’re not overreacting. They want reassurance they’re not making a mistake. They want someone to tell them what the right decision is. But underneath all of that is the deeper ache of feeling disconnected from their own knowing. In this episode, I talk about why self-trust can feel so hard, especially when many of us were taught from a young age to look outside ourselves for answers. When you’re in the middle of a life transition like this, it can feel like being out in the middle of the ocean during a storm. There’s no clear map. No solid ground. Just the question of whether you can trust the voice inside you. I share the three things I’ve seen make the biggest difference in helping women rebuild that trust. Community that reflects you back to yourself. A deeper relationship with your intuition and the unseen. And the kind of knowledge that doesn’t just give you information, but helps you finally understand what you’re experiencing. This episode isn’t about giving you the answer to whether you should stay or go. It’s about something much more powerful than that. It’s about helping you remember that the voice inside you is worth listening to. And that self-trust is something you can rebuild, one step at a time. 🤍 Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Episode 50: You Can’t Logic Your Way Out of a Marriage (And What to Do Instead) Sisterhood of the Seers Oracle – Athena Laz The Muse Tarot: A 78-Card Deck & Guidebook - Chris-Anne The Cosmic Crossroads Oracle - Amanda Lynn Aisling The Hero’s Journey Dream Oracle - Kelly Sullivan Walden The Wild Unknown Decks – Kim Krans The Light Seer’s Tarot – Chris-Anne Man and His Symbols – Carl Jung Jungian Dream Interpretation Tool Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| When Your Marriage Feels Like Fate & How To Reclaim Your Destiny | 03 Mar 2026 | 01:17:34 | |
Episode 97: This week’s episode goes straight to the heart of something many of you are living inside, even if you’ve never named it. Is this my fate? Or do I actually have a say in what happens next? If you’re considering divorce, you already know the weight of that question. The feeling that this decision will ripple through everything. Your children. Your future. The story of your life. It can feel predetermined, almost inevitable. Like this is just how it turned out. In this episode, I unpack the difference between fate and destiny in the way I’ve come to understand them through my own life and my work with women. Fate, to me, is what happens when we live unconsciously. When trauma stays buried. When old attachment wounds and survival strategies quietly organize our choices from the background. It’s the repetition that feels eerie and familiar. The same loneliness. The same power dynamics. The same feeling of not being enough. Different faces, same pattern. Destiny is something very different. It is not toxic positivity. It is not “just manifest harder.” And it is not a rigid script you are required to follow. Destiny is what begins to unfold when you start making the unconscious conscious. When you name your patterns. When you stop normalizing what hurts. When you reclaim your authority from systems, partners, parents, and even old versions of yourself. I walk through three essential nuances that matter deeply in this conversation: trauma complicates free will, not everything is self-created, and fate most often shows up as repetition compulsion. If you have ever wondered why you “chose” something that now makes you unhappy, this will land. And if you are asking yourself whether to stay or go, I want you to hear this: the deepest question is not just what you will choose. It is how awake you are inside the choosing. Destiny might mean repairing your marriage with brutal honesty. It might mean leaving with that same level of consciousness. The outcome is not the point. The point is whether you are repeating from old wounds or responding from integration. This episode is an invitation to stop living on autopilot and to start participating in your own becoming. Take a breath. Let it meet you where you are. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Divorcing the “Good Guy”: From Confusion & Doubt to a Clear No | 24 Feb 2026 | 01:48:30 | |
I’m sitting down with “Jane,” a woman I’ve had the honor of walking alongside inside the Stay or Go community for over a year as she considered, wrestled with, and ultimately chose divorce. I watched her do this work in real time. Not in a dramatic, blow-it-all-up way. In a slow, honest, deeply courageous way. Jane is divorcing what most people would call a “good guy.” No addiction. No affair. No obvious villain. From the outside, her marriage looked fine. Maybe even better than fine. And yet inside, she felt alone. Unseen. Disconnected from her own body. Her libido had disappeared. Her nervous system was frayed. She was carrying the emotional weight of the relationship while trying to convince herself it wasn’t “bad enough” to leave. We talk about what happens when a woman begins to speak up and how that alone can disrupt entire family systems. We talk about sexual coercion inside marriage and how easily it gets normalized. We talk about the terrifying moment when you realize you’re the only one truly doing the work. And we talk about integration, the long stretch between knowing something in your bones and being ready to act on it. Jane shares the flashpoint that shifted everything. The year and a half of deep identity work that followed. The escalation that can happen when you finally say the words out loud. And the unexpected peace of lying on the floor of your own place for the first time, realizing your body can finally exhale. What I love most about this conversation is how honest it is. There’s no clean arc. No instant certainty. Just a woman slowly disentangling herself from systems that were never built to support her and choosing alignment over appearance. If you’re in a marriage that looks acceptable on paper but feels hollow in your body, this one is for you. In Jane’s words, and I could not agree more: You can do this. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Come Home to Your Body Wisdom With Chandra Zas | 20 Feb 2026 | 01:17:26 | |
Episode 95: I had the opportunity to sit down live with my dear friend, Chandra Zas, to talk about her chapters in The Handbook for Human Potential. And while at first glance this might seem like a departure from our usual stay-or-go conversations, it is anything but. Because before you can make a clear decision about your marriage, you have to rebuild trust with yourself. So many of us have been trained to override our bodies. We override exhaustion. We override sadness. We override anger. We override our no. We override our intuition. And then, standing at one of the most consequential crossroads of our lives, we expect clarity to magically appear. Of course it feels like chaos. In this episode, we explore what it means to come home to your body in a grounded, practical way. We talk about early conditioning and shame. About how coping behaviors are often attempts at soothing a dysregulated nervous system. About the difference between demands and requests, and how that shift alone can transform the emotional architecture of our relationships. At its core, this conversation is about embodiment. About understanding that self-trust is not built through analysis alone, but through learning to feel and respond to your own internal signals with respect. If you are navigating uncertainty, especially around divorce, this episode invites you to slow down. To return to the foundation beneath the decision. To rebuild the connection that makes any choice — stay or go — something you can stand behind with steadiness. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Handbook for Human Potential: An Accessible Guide to Personal Growth - Chandra Zas, Britta Jo and Others Chandra Zas’s chapters: Chapter 0 and Chapter 10 Handbook for Human Potential Amazon reviews No Bad Kids - Janet Lansbury Nonviolent Communication - Marshall B. Rosenberg PhD Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| "Positive Disintegration": Why It Feels Like You’re Falling Apart Before You Decide to Stay or Go | 10 Feb 2026 | 01:29:37 | |
Episode 94: In this episode, I start by inviting us to slow down together. I recorded this on February 8, 2026, and I could feel how loud life has been lately. Instead of showing up with a tidy bow and a perfect lesson, I let this be a real conversation between me and you. A place to breathe, to soften, and to tell the truth about what it feels like when your inner world is rearranging itself. Because today we are talking about falling apart, and why it might be the most honest thing your soul has ever done. I’m introducing you to a concept I just found this week and immediately knew I needed to bring to you: positive disintegration. The kind of breakdown that isn’t a failure, but a signal. A sign that the strategies you used to survive, the roles you learned to play, and the fantasies you clung to are no longer able to hold back what you already know in your bones. In other words, it’s not that you are breaking. It’s that your denial is breaking. And something truer is trying to come through. We talk about why our culture fears endings, grief, and death, and how that fear shows up psychologically when we’re in the crucible of change, especially when you’re considering divorce. I connect this to the life-death-life cycle, to the way nature does this without apologizing, and to the brutal tenderness of becoming. If you’ve been feeling heavy, depressed, anxious, or stuck, I want you to hear this clearly: those feelings do not automatically mean you’re doing it wrong. Sometimes they mean you’re finally doing it right. I also share one of my favorite images for this process: the butterfly becoming the goo. That disorienting, humiliating, sacred middle. The place where you cannot go back to who you were, but you cannot yet see who you’re becoming. If you’re there right now, you are not behind. You are not broken. You are in the chrysalis. And I bring in two powerful texts that help us name what we’re living: Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents and Women Who Run with the Wolves. We talk about Skeleton Woman, Lady Death, and what it means to stop throwing the parts of ourselves we fear off the cliff. We talk about building a foundation that can hold you through the unraveling, not by rushing to fix the feelings, but by staying with yourself inside them. If you’re in that tender, terrifying season where everything you built your life on feels shaky, this episode is for you. It’s a reminder that the breakdown might not be the end of your story. It might be the beginning of your true self returning. 🤍 Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Live interview with Chandra Zas - Tuesday Feb 17th • 2pm PT, 4 pm CST, 5 pm EST (Use this link if the one above doesn’t work- https://youtube.com/live/2DiSl3ZyV3M) What happens when you stop overriding your body… and start listening instead? In this live conversation, Britta interviews Chandra on Chapter 0 of Handbook for Human Potential — a chapter that opens the doorway to body wisdom, emotional truth, and coming home to yourself. Join our book newsletter to stay in the loop: https://handbookforhumanpotential.com And buy the book if you haven’t yet! Handbook for Human Potential by Chandra Zas, Britta Jo and others https://Chandrazas.com Suggested prep for next episode: Read Chandra’s chapter 0 - “Come Home to Your Body Wisdom” Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson Women Who Run with the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estés From Here to Eternity: Traveling the World to Find the Good Death by Caitlin Doughty Considering Divorce? Understand the Life-Death-Life Cycle First Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| When Staying Costs More Than Leaving: The Hidden Price of Indecision With Demetria Graves | 03 Feb 2026 | 00:38:23 | |
Episode 93: In this episode, I sit down with Demetria Graves, a certified family law specialist and founder of the Graves Law Firm, for a conversation I have wanted to have for a long time. Demetria has spent over two decades guiding families through divorce with clarity, integrity, and a deep respect for what this moment costs people emotionally and financially. Together, we pull back the curtain on what the legal system actually cares about and what it does not, and why so many women unknowingly pay a steep price for staying stuck in indecision. We talk candidly about the myths that keep women frozen. The belief that staying is safer. The hope that being patient or accommodating will somehow protect you. The assumption that the court will reward sacrifice or take emotional context into account. Demetria explains why none of that is true, and how time, lack of information, and emotional overwhelm can quietly work against women, especially high earners, stay at home mothers, and those who have stepped away from the workforce. This is a grounded, no nonsense look at how money, custody, support, and preparation really function behind the scenes. This episode is not about pushing anyone toward divorce. It is about telling the truth. The truth that divorce is a business process layered on top of one of the most emotional experiences of your life. The truth that clarity is power. And the truth that the longer you avoid looking at the facts, the more agency you often lose. If you are in the space of “I am not ready yet” or “I just need more time,” this conversation is an invitation to ask yourself what that time is truly costing you. 🤍 Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Legally Uncensored Podcast - Find Part 1 here When Women Run The Firm: How to successfully launch and manage your law practice with confidence - Demetria Graves Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Your Soul Knows the Way—Even If You Can’t See It Yet | 27 Jan 2026 | 00:37:03 | |
Episode 92: This week, I’m inviting you into a quieter, more intimate conversation. After a month filled with heavier topics—ADHD, misogyny, and partner violence—I found myself needing to pause. This episode emerged from that space. There’s no outline, no script—just me, speaking from the heart. In it, I explore what it means to stay grounded as a deeply sensitive person in an increasingly fractured world. I reflect on a local production of Hadestown that unexpectedly cracked something open in me, illuminating the profound choice we face between fear and trust. We follow the tragic story of Orpheus and Eurydice, and what it reveals about how easily doubt can derail us—even when we are on the cusp of something beautiful. If you are navigating the unknown, especially in the realm of divorce or deep personal change, I believe you’ll resonate with this idea: that trusting your soul’s call, even when you can’t yet see where it leads, is itself the act of creating a new world. And that turning back, out of fear or uncertainty, is something we all understand—and still, we get to begin again. This episode is both a personal check-in and a wider call to all of us doing the brave work of building something new. Whether you’re in a place of exhaustion, reflection, or decision, I hope this conversation offers you a quiet companion on the path forward. Show Notes Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Q&A with Anaïs Mitchell (writer & composer of Hadestown) and Rachel Chavkin (director of Hadestown) Journey of Souls - Dr. Michael Newton Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| You’re Not Alone: Misogyny, Violence, and Real-World Safety Tools | 20 Jan 2026 | 01:33:46 | |
Episode 91: This is one of the most important—and most difficult—episodes I’ve ever recorded. In it, I speak openly and directly about intimate partner violence, including heartbreaking local and national examples of the very real dangers women face when they decide to leave. This is not a conversation many of us were raised to have. I wasn’t. But after years of coaching women who are considering divorce, I know we cannot afford to keep looking away. Together, we unpack critical statistics that are too often hidden behind passive headlines. I share a deeply personal story of a woman in my community whose life was taken after she left a partner—and how her death, and others like it, must wake us up to what is truly at stake. I also walk you through warning signs, risk factors, and the psychological patterns that too many women have been taught to minimize. And most of all, I offer you something I wish every woman had: a third way. Not the false binary of stay and survive or leave and risk everything—but a path built on information, preparation, and connection. This episode is about reclaiming our safety. About standing shoulder to shoulder in the face of rising misogyny and systemic silence. About refusing to shrink or isolate, and instead learning how to call out the realities we live in—with clarity, courage, and love. If you’re not ready for this episode today, that’s okay. But I want you to know it’s here, whenever you are. And if you listen and this lands close to home, please know: you do not have to walk this alone. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 National Domestic Violence Hotline (U.S.)24/7 free and confidential support * Call: 800-799-SAFE (7233) * Text: START to 88788 * Chat online: thehotline.org They can help you build a personalized safety plan — whether you’re still in the relationship, planning to leave, or already out and still feeling unsafe. DomesticShelters.org – Safety Planning GuideA detailed, step-by-step guide to help you prepare in a way that fits your unique situation.https://www.domesticshelters.org/articles/comprehensive-guides/a-guide-to-domestic-violence-safety-planning?utm_source WomensLaw.org – Legal Safety PlanningIncludes emotional safety planning plus legal tips around custody, protection orders, and more.https://www.womenslaw.org/safety-planning?utm_source Safe Horizon – Understanding What Goes Into a Safety PlanLearn what to prepare and how to communicate your plan to trusted people.https://www.safehorizon.org/safety-plan/?utm_source https://www.southdenvertherapy.com/blog/domestic-violence-statistics?utm_source=chatgpt.com https://www.domesticshelters.org/articles/statistics/when-abuse-turns-deadly?utm_source=chatgpt.com The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| The "Sacred Marriage": Why Your Shadow Holds Keys to Your Power with Dani Granaroli | 26 May 2026 | 01:27:10 | |
Episode 108: We are so often told that self-connection is about positive vibes, daily mantras, and focusing only on the light. But if you have ever hit a wall with traditional manifestation work—if you have found yourself feeling completely stuck despite your best efforts—you already know there is a deeper layer of yourself waiting to be met. This week, I am so excited to introduce you to Dani. We met back in 2024 in a coach training container, and she is hands-down one of the most uniquely grounded, delightful, and artistic coaches I have ever worked with. In my own moments of feeling fractured, Dani is the person who created a space safe enough for my deepest, most hidden parts to finally creep out and be seen. In this episode, we dig into what it actually means to bring together our light and dark parts through what Dani calls the “alchemical marriage of opposites.” She shares her journey from living as a highly dissociated, intellect-driven human to anchoring deeply in her body through myofascial release, the deep mind-mapping of Dr. Robert, and the paradigm-shifting world of Carolyn Elliott’s Existential Kink. What We Dig Into: * The Backdoor Ego Agenda: How we often try to do shadow work with a secret condition (“I’ll look at my darkness, but only if it gives me what I want”), and what happens when we ask: What if this never changes? * The Energy of Resistance: Why it takes so much work to keep parts of ourselves repressed, and how finding approval for your shadow liberates your creative force. * Slowing Down to Titrate: Moving away from treating our bodies like machines and learning how to sit with intense emotions for just 30 seconds at a time. * Parts Work and the Savior Complex: Why every single part of you loves you and has a positive intention—even the messy ones—and how to stop giving until you burn out. * Money as the “Final Boss”: A transparent look at why money, receiving, and worth are the ultimate playgrounds for shadow work. If you are navigating the disorienting, in-between space of considering divorce, or if you are just exhausted from treating your personal growth like a grueling chore, this conversation is a breath of fresh air. It is an invitation to move away from heavy “healing work” and step into deep, soulful play. Show Notes: Connect with Dani: Penetrate Radio Podcast: John Barnes Myofascial Release Connect with Britta: Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| When You’re the One Who’s "Hard to Love": ADHD, Labels, and Learning to See Yourself Differently | 13 Jan 2026 | 02:34:44 | |
Episode 90: In this second part of the series, I take you inside what has been one of the most tender, clarifying, and ultimately empowering chapters of my life: navigating an adult ADHD diagnosis, beginning medication, and reclaiming parts of myself I didn’t know I had lost. We start with a kind of radical idea—what if knowing yourself deeply, even when it’s painful, is the path to peace? In a time when there’s growing pushback against diagnosis and therapy language, I share a different perspective. One rooted in lived experience. One that says language doesn’t confine us, it frees us. Naming what lives inside us doesn’t shrink our potential, it releases shame. I talk openly about the emotional process of receiving an ADHD diagnosis and how it allowed me to trace patterns I had never been able to name—patterns that shaped my childhood, my relationship with my mother, my marriage, my nervous system. I share honestly about the grief that surfaced, the beliefs I had to examine, and why, at first, even with a prescription in hand, I couldn’t take the medication. But then life intervened. A mental and emotional breaking point became the catalyst for finally saying yes to deeper support. I walk you through the realities of what that looked like: the side effects, the scheduling, the slow and steady shifts that began to change everything. This episode holds nothing back. I talk about what has improved and what I miss. What has steadied and what has softened. And I name the truth that felt like a revelation—this diagnosis didn’t make me feel broken. It made me feel seen. It gave me a new story to tell about myself. One filled with compassion, understanding, and even awe. I also share the ten “superpowers” I now see in myself—traits I once judged that I now hold with reverence. Empathy. Intuition. Creativity. Justice sensitivity. Risk-taking. Drive. These parts of me didn’t begin with the diagnosis, but they have deepened in how I understand and honor them. This episode is for every woman who has ever feared that the real problem is her. Who has worried that even if she leaves, the same pain will follow. Who has wondered if she is just too much, too chaotic, too emotional, too different to be fully loved. I want you to know: there is nothing wrong with you. There are just things you may not yet understand. And when you find the language, the support, and the people who see you as whole and valuable exactly as you are—everything can change. Whether or not you have ADHD, whether or not you are considering medication, this conversation is about something much bigger. It is about returning to yourself with clarity, with curiosity, and with love. It is about finally naming the truth: that the answers were never out there. They have always been within you. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Andrea Andes - Therapist A Radical Guide for Women with ADHD - Sari Solden and Michelle Frank ADHD for Smart Ass Women - Tracy Otsuka Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving - Pete Walker Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Could Undiagnosed ADHD Be Your Missing Piece? | 06 Jan 2026 | 02:50:26 | |
Episode 89: Welcome to 2026, my loves. I’m starting this year with one of the most personal and tender episodes I’ve ever shared. In Part One of this two-part series, I’m opening the door to my recent ADHD diagnosis—how it reframed not just the last few years, but the landscape of my entire life. This isn’t just an episode about ADHD. It’s about the slow unraveling of shame. About finally understanding why therapy, coaching, somatic work—even with all the growth they gave me—could never quite reach the black box of suffering I carried. It’s about the enormous relief that comes when you realize: the problem was never that you weren’t trying hard enough. The problem was that no one ever gave you the right map. I walk through the traits of adult ADHD that have shifted how I parent, how I relate, and how I see the intense emotional terrain I’ve spent a lifetime navigating. We’ll talk about rejection-sensitive dysphoria, overstimulation, emotional dysregulation, and the unseen labor of masking that so many women carry silently. I share how medication has begun to create space where there was none—allowing me to show up in my life with more steadiness, more self-compassion, and far less self-judgment. Whether ADHD is something you’ve long suspected in yourself or something that’s never crossed your mind, I encourage you to listen. Especially if you’re a woman navigating huge decisions like divorce. Undiagnosed ADHD can shape our self-worth, our relationships, and our emotional bandwidth in ways we don’t always see. And when we don’t know it’s there, we so often internalize the pain as personal failure. But you’re not failing. You’re just finally being seen. This episode is my offering to anyone who’s ever looked around at their life and thought, “Why is this so hard?” May it give you language, permission, and a starting point for something softer, truer, and more whole. So take a breath. Let’s begin this year not with resolutions, but with revelation. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Miss. Diagnosis: A Systematic Review of ADHD in Adult Women - Emma A. Climie 10 Things I Wish Everyone Knew About ADHD - I Have ADHD Podcast A Radical Guide for Women with ADHD - Sari Solden and Michelle Frank ADHD for Smart Ass Women - Tracy Otsuka Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving - Pete Walker Strong Ground - Brené Brown Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Holiday Boundaries & Protecting Your Peace | 23 Dec 2025 | 01:12:43 | |
Episode 88: Two days before Christmas can feel especially heavy when you are quietly considering divorce. The holidays have a way of magnifying everything: the grief, the pressure to perform, the old family dynamics, and the fear of being asked questions you are not ready to answer. In this episode, I pull you in close with warmth and honesty. I share a story I had forgotten until I found it in my journals: a Christmas with my in-laws when something deeply personal about my faith journey was shared before I was ready. What followed was a long, well intentioned but deeply dysregulating family conversation that left me feeling exposed, overwhelmed, and pushed into the familiar role so many of us know well: explaining, caretaking, and managing everyone else’s emotions. That experience brings us to the core message of this episode: you do not owe anyone answers. Not about your marriage. Not about your timeline. Not about the parts of you that are still tender and unfolding. It is not your job to make your life make sense to other people, especially during the holidays when old patterns of people pleasing and codependency are at their loudest. We talk about how these patterns tend to show up this time of year: staying with family even when it makes you feel trapped, overcommitting to keep the peace, avoiding alone time, overexplaining, staying quiet to avoid conflict, and prioritizing everyone else’s comfort while your own nervous system is stretched thin. I offer language you can use when conversations turn invasive, along with permission to let others feel uncomfortable without rushing to fix it. We also spend time on nervous system support and practical ways to protect your peace, from creating small pockets of solitude to rethinking logistics like where you stay, how you travel, and how long you remain at gatherings. Most of all, this episode is a reminder that you matter during the holidays. Your peace matters. You are allowed to choose yourself, even imperfectly, even quietly, even when it disappoints others. You do not have to explain your way into being understood. You are allowed to protect what is sacred while you are still becoming. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack The Live Awake Podcast - Sarah Blondin Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Inside the Divorce Process: From Considering to Finalized With Quinn Otrera | 16 Dec 2025 | 01:59:58 | |
Episode 87: In this conversation with my dear friend Quinn, we finally do what I wish someone had done for me all those years ago. We open the black box of divorce and lay the process out in a way that is human, honest, and actually useful. Not theory, not legal jargon, but the lived reality of two women who walked very different paths through the same fire. Quinn’s journey into divorce was long and chronic, shaped by decades of Mormon conditioning and a lifetime of being told not to trust herself. Mine was sharper and more sudden, driven by depression, suicidal ideation, and the painful awakening that I wasn’t broken, the systems around me were. Together we unravel how religious, cultural, and patriarchal messaging keeps women trapped in self‑blame and confusion long past the point where something in their soul knows the truth. From there we walk step‑by‑step through the process itself. Trial separations, the moment you know, the strategy required before you tell him, the emotional whiplash of filing, and in my case, the shock of living under the same roof after the divorce was underway. We talk temporary orders, discovery, mediation, attorneys who fight for you, and the strange mix of grief and relief that comes as the legal structure finally begins to take shape. And then Quinn offers what most people never get to hear. What happens after the decree is signed. What happens when an ex refuses to follow orders. What happens when you need legal protection. What it is like to work with the courts, child protective services, school counselors, and low‑cost legal aid. What it looks like to slowly build a self so solid that you no longer bend to chaos but meet it with clarity and consequence. This episode is not about telling you whether to stay or go. It is about turning on the lights so you can stop imagining monsters and start seeing the terrain for what it truly is. If divorce has felt like a void you are terrified to step into, I want this conversation to feel like a hand on your back saying, You can do this. You can learn. You can prepare. You can choose the life that calls to you. Your life, your story, and your safety matter. And you do not have to walk this part alone. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Four Soulful Ways to Journal for Self-Worth & Secure-Attachment | 09 Dec 2025 | 01:03:41 | |
This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit stayorgo.substack.com Episode 86: Ohhhh my loves — this one’s a biggie. 💥 What started as a simple question from one of my beautiful Substack subscribers turned into something so much deeper. In this episode, I finally give the practice of journaling the spotlight it deserves. Not the surface-level, “dear diary” kind of journaling. I’m talking about the real thing. The gritty, raw, healing kind. The kind that has quietly become one of the most sacred tools in my own self-resourcing practice — and one of the top ways I’ve built secure attachment with myself over the past eight years. This episode is both a personal excavation and a love letter. I talk about what’s been stirring in me lately — the speed of change in our world, the collective instability so many of us are feeling, and why now, more than ever, we need to be able to trust ourselves. Not in some performative, “I’ve got this” kind of way — but in a deep, anchored, soul-level way. And that’s what journaling can offer when we use it intentionally. You’ll hear me break down the four journaling styles I’ve organically developed: Growth Documentation, Pep Talks, Brain Dump Dialogues (y’all… this one 👀), and Higher Self Channeling. Each one serves a different purpose depending on where I am emotionally or energetically — and each has played a massive role in helping me show up for myself, especially when the outside world feels anything but steady. And for my paid Substack crew, I’ve included a gorgeous PDF (because we know we love a tangible tool 💌) that walks you through each style with starter prompts, tips, and even real-life photos from my journals. Whether you’re in the depths of the considering process or simply craving a deeper connection with yourself, this episode is my holiday gift to you. May it help you remember that no matter what’s unfolding around you, you are your own safe place. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Handbook for Human Potential Links No Bad Parts - Richard Schwartz Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive | |||
| Stop the Narcissist Hunt: Focus on How YOU Feel Instead | 02 Dec 2025 | 01:37:19 | |
Episode 85: Okay, y’all. This episode has been building all month. After revisiting my journals, hosting powerful conversations in the community, listening to Olivia’s story, and sitting with a few seriously paradigm-shifting insights, I knew I needed to pull it all together and share where I’ve landed. We’re talking narcissism, but not in the black-and-white, overused “therapy speak” way you’re seeing all over the internet. I’m breaking down the difference between actual narcissistic abuse and emotionally immature behavior that might be just subtle enough to keep you spinning. I introduce the continuum I developed this month—a framework that’s already shifting so much for the women in the community—and talk about how it’s helping us see both ourselves and our partners more clearly. We also dig into the truth that many of you need most: sometimes someone’s “best” is just not enough for you. Period. And you don’t need a diagnosis to walk away. So if you’ve ever caught yourself wondering, Is he a narcissist… or am I just overthinking everything? or if you’ve felt the weight of needing a “reason” to leave—this episode is for you 💥 You’ll leave with more clarity, a whole lot more compassion for yourself, and a deeper sense of what it really means to take your power back 🔥 Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Six Keys To Unlock Your Understanding of Narcissism - Substack Article Are They Really a Narcissist? Do They Really Have Borderline? Are They Truly Gaslighting You? - Podcast Episode They’re Not Gaslighting You - Isabelle Morley The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists: Coping with the One-Way Relationship in Work, Love, and Family - Eleanor Payson Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Litigation to Liberation: Surviving a Narcissist and a $250K Divorce | 25 Nov 2025 | 01:19:17 | |
Episode 84: In today’s episode, I sit down with “Olivia,” a woman I worked with one-on-one during the early days of her unraveling a 21-year marriage marked by deep narcissistic abuse. What unfolds in this conversation is one of the most raw, courageous, and unflinching portraits we’ve ever had on the podcast of what it means to wake up inside a marriage and realize: this isn’t love. Not the kind that sees you. Not the kind that holds you. Together, we trace Olivia’s journey from the exhaustion and confusion of her lowest point—when the gaslighting and emotional manipulation were so constant, she barely recognized herself anymore—to the firestorm of her divorce and, ultimately, to the quiet, grounded peace she’s found on the other side. She shares what it cost her to stay: the subtle erasure of her identity, her joy, her voice. She shares the moment she realized she was no longer standing up for her kids. And perhaps most importantly, she shares how she clawed her way back—learning to borrow hope, hold boundaries, and honor the wild, beautiful pulse of her own truth. This episode is an offering for any woman who has doubted what she feels. For those who know something isn’t right but can’t yet name it. For those who are starting to see the cost of staying too long. If you’ve ever whispered to yourself, “I can’t do this anymore,” let Olivia’s story be a companion in the dark and a reminder: your freedom is real, and it is possible. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Awake - Jen Hatmaker The Let Them Theory - Mel Robbins Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| When the Stars Begin to Shift — Journal Entries from the After | 18 Nov 2025 | 01:08:23 | |
Episode 83: This week’s episode feels like opening a sealed box from a past lifetime and discovering not only who I was, but the quiet, determined woman I was becoming long before I could see her clearly. These final journal entries are some of the rawest I have ever shared. They move through the full terrain of my inner world during the months surrounding my separation and divorce, including the parts I still feel in my body when I read them. Before we dive into those pages, I share a personal update that has been nothing short of life altering. Receiving an ADHD diagnosis as an adult, and recognizing its generational threads, has reorganized so much of my story. It has rewritten the way I see my mother, my own emotional landscape, and the compassion I now hold for the woman I was for so many years without a framework to understand herself. I speak about the transformative impact of discovering medication that finally supports my brain and the grief that comes with wondering what might have been possible for the women who came before me if they had been given the same tools. From there, we return to the journals. These entries illuminate the beautiful, brutal truth that becoming the woman capable of changing her life is not a single choice but a thousand small ones. In one moment, I am standing in my closet realizing there is no one coming to save me and feeling the terror and power of that truth. In the next moment, I am coaching myself toward a different reality with nothing more than self compassion, deliberate awareness, and the willingness to choose again. You will hear me navigate the shock of betrayal during my separation, the frightening escalation that often accompanies disentangling from a narcissistic dynamic, and the experience of sitting at a kitchen table telling my children our family was changing. These pages were written by a woman who was terrified, grieving, hopeful, and determined all at once. A woman who had no evidence that her future would turn out the way she dreamed, yet continued to write her way forward anyway. And then, in the final entry, you will hear a voice that stunned even me when I found it again. A voice that knew without hesitation the life she was creating. A voice that listed out the future I am now living, long before I had the courage, stability, or clarity to imagine any of it realistically. Reading that list feels like witnessing my past self bless my present self, reminding me that soul calls never arrive empty. They carry the architecture of what is possible. This episode is an invitation to honor your own unfolding in the same way. To see the patterns you are outgrowing, the chapters you are grieving, and the expansions you are already stepping into. To remember that every becoming is patterned with both collapse and creation. And that the you who is writing today’s entry may be the woman your future self thanks for changing everything. If you are in the thick of it, please know you are not behind and you are not failing. You are mid‑chapter. You are in the woods. You are becoming. And you are not alone. 💗 Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack ADHD for Smart Ass Women - Tracy Otsuka Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Can a Woman Change Her Stars? — Journal Entries from the Before | 11 Nov 2025 | 01:00:06 | |
Episode 82: In this deeply personal episode, I take you back to the earliest days of my own journey—before I made the decision to divorce. Through sharing two intimate journal entries from 2017, you’ll step inside my inner world at a time when my future felt uncertain, and yet a quiet, insistent voice inside me whispered, “You can change your stars.” These entries are raw and unfiltered. One captures the first flickers of awakening, a moment when I glimpsed what real love, real home, and real alignment could feel like. The other reflects the doubt, confusion, and self-questioning that followed soon after. Together, they reveal how nonlinear, layered, and sacred this process of transformation truly is. This episode is for any woman who finds herself in the “before”—the place where hope feels distant and clarity feels just out of reach. It’s a reminder that you’re not alone, that your feelings are valid, and that even in the darkness, there is power in trusting your own soul’s knowing. My hope is that these reflections illuminate your path as you navigate your own questions and challenges. I want you to see what’s possible when you follow those soul calls—when you allow yourself to believe, even if only faintly at first, that a different life might be available to you. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| From Fog to Freedom: Understanding Narcissistic Abuse with Pare Underwood | 04 Nov 2025 | 01:09:45 | |
Episode 81: If you’re anything like I was, you’re holding it together on the outside, while silently unraveling on the inside. You’ve tried therapy. You’ve tried harder. You’ve read the books and done the journaling. But something still feels off in your marriage—and you can’t quite name what it is. In this episode, I sit down with the woman who first helped me name it. My former counselor, Paré Underwood, was the person who gently—without ever pushing—began to walk me back to myself. At the time, I didn’t realize I was in a narcissistically abusive relationship. I just thought I was failing. As a wife. As a mother. As a human being. We talk about what narcissistic abuse actually looks and feels like from the inside, and why it so often goes unrecognized—especially by professionals. If you’ve been in therapy for years and no one has helped you put the pieces together, this conversation will hit home. We explore the small, subtle signs: the self-doubt, the second-guessing, the way you slowly lose access to your own inner voice. We also dive into what makes women more vulnerable to repeating these dynamics in future relationships, and how to protect yourself without having to shut down your softness or your empathy. Paré shares how she gently helps clients begin to reclaim their thoughts, their preferences, and their reality—even in marriages where there’s no visible “incident” to point to. This one is deeply personal. It’s for those of you who feel exhausted and confused but still unsure. For those who are wondering, “Is it me?” and quietly suspecting the answer might be no. If you’re starting to consider divorce but feel like your own instincts have been turned against you, this conversation will bring clarity—and hopefully, some relief. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists: Coping with the One-Way Relationship in Work, Love, and Family - Eleanor Payson Paré’s Information: Paré’s Resource for Examples of Verbal, Emotional, and Physical Abuse Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Stop Doubting, Start Designing: Become the Authority of Your Life with Human Design and Diana Elizabeth | 19 May 2026 | 01:06:16 | |
Episode 107: In this episode, I sit down with Deanna Elizabeth for a conversation about Human Design and the deeper work of self-connection it can open inside us. This is not a conversation about a system of labels or complex data charts. It is a conversation about what happens when you begin to trust that authority may already be living within you. We explore what it looks like to connect with your unique energetic blueprint. To listen for the truths beneath the noise of lifelong conditioning, family expectations, and trauma. And to approach Human Design not as something outside of you, but as a literal X-ray that helps you access what your body, your soul, and your inner voice may already know. At the center of this conversation is a powerful remembering. So many women considering divorce have been taught that truth must come through prescribed channels. That access to safety, to knowing, to authority lives somewhere outside of themselves—in a partner, a family, or a system. But what if the real invitation is to reclaim your own relationship with wisdom? To let your natural strategy, your intuition, and your body become part of the language through which you come home to yourself? Through this conversation, you will hear what it means to look at your design with reverence, curiosity, and openness. You will learn about the precise “monkeys”—the shadow patterns and ancestral distortions—that pull you away from your alignment, and how identifying them gives you the power to choose yourself. Not a way to escape your life, but a way to meet yourself more fully. This episode is not really about Human Design. It is about remembering how to trust your own knowing. ✨ Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Join us for the Human Design Workshop on Sunday, May 24th, 2026 Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| The Cost of the Call: When Choosing Yourself Feels Like Losing Everything | 28 Oct 2025 | 01:26:59 | |
Episode 80: This week, I’m bringing you into something that’s been sitting heavy on my heart. It’s a conversation I’ve touched on before, but never like this. I want to talk about what it really costs to follow your soul calls. Not the pretty version, but the actual lived experience. The kind that feels like your life is unraveling and you’re not sure who you’ll be on the other side. Because here’s the truth. Choosing yourself often comes with loss. Sometimes it means losing your marriage, or the financial stability that came with it. Sometimes it means watching the relationship with your children shift in painful ways. Or realizing the religion, identity, or belief system that shaped your whole world no longer fits. It can look like grief, fear, and uncertainty so big you start to wonder if the cost is just too high. But in this episode, I want to walk with you through that fire. I want to name what it feels like to stand at the edge of everything you once knew, and still decide not to turn back. To stay with yourself even when you don’t know what’s next. I share stories from women in this community, from my own life, and from the quiet courage I’ve seen again and again in those of you choosing something more honest, even when it breaks your heart. This isn’t a step-by-step guide. It’s a sit-down, heart-to-heart. The kind where I look you in the eye and remind you that yes, this is hard. And no, you’re not broken for finding it hard. You’re becoming. You’re remembering who you are. And the two things that will carry you through are trust in yourself and trust in something bigger that is still holding your life, even when you can’t see it. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Signs: The Secret Language of the Universe - Laura Lynne JacksonThe Surrender Experiment - Michael A. SingerThe Untethered Soul - Michael A. SingerThe Seat of the Soul - Gary ZukavJourney of Souls - Michael NewtonWomen Who Run With the Wolves - Clarissa Pinkola EstesLive Awake Podcast - Sarah Blondin The Voice of Knowledge - Don Miguel Ruiz Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Our Futures Are Unwritten: Trusting the Mystery | 21 Oct 2025 | 01:27:09 | |
Episode 79: There are moments in life when the future feels like a wide-open wilderness—unmapped, uncertain, and at times, terrifying. In this episode, I speak from that raw, unfiltered place. This is a deeply personal and present-time transmission, recorded just after attending a No Kings protest that left me both cracked open and powerfully emboldened. What poured through was more than just reflection on current events. It became a call to reimagine the stories we’re telling ourselves about our lives, our choices, and the future of our world. I share why I believe, now more than ever, that our futures, both individually and collectively, are unwritten. That no matter how much fear or resignation may surround us, we still hold the pen. Whether you’re watching global systems shake or standing at the edge of your own unknown in a marriage that no longer feels like home, this episode is an invitation to stop outsourcing your certainty to history, to others, or to fear. Instead, I offer a path toward presence, toward living the questions, and toward trusting in the slow, often sacred, unfolding of your own becoming. This is for you if you’ve been feeling overwhelmed by the weight of everything, or if you’ve been waiting for a sign that it’s okay not to have all the answers. It’s okay to not know. It’s okay to trust the mystery. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Every Woman Needs This: The Power of Female Community | 14 Oct 2025 | 01:37:45 | |
Episode 78: After hosting our first Stay or Go retreat, I sat down with my best friend and behind-the-scenes soul-sister, Quinn, to unpack what we experienced and what it revealed about the kind of connection women are craving, now more than ever. This episode is not just a reflection on one powerful weekend. It’s an invitation to consider what becomes possible when we stop trying to do life alone. We talk about the difference between performative connection and the kind that regulates your nervous system, that lets you exhale, that reminds you you’re not too much and never have been. It’s the kind of connection that arises when women come together in spaces where there’s no power-over, no fixing, and no pressure to perform. We explore the grief that often comes with disconnection—even the disconnections we choose, like divorce or estrangement and how the pain isn’t always about getting it wrong, but about being wired for attachment in a world that has taught us to suppress it. We speak to the cultural systems—patriarchy, capitalism, hyper-individualism—that have stripped women of the community they’re built for, and what it means to reclaim that. Whether you’re still in your marriage, already out, or just beginning to whisper the question—this conversation is for the woman who’s tired of white-knuckling her way through life. It’s for the woman who’s ready to be witnessed, to be held, to be reminded that connection isn’t a bonus. It’s essential. And it’s waiting for you. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Strong Ground - Brene Brown The Rise & Fall of Capitalism - Diabolical Lies Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation: The U.S. Surgeon General’s Advisory on the Healing Effects of Social Connection and Community. - Surgeon General’s Advisory Doing Almost Anything is Better With Friends, Research Finds - Washington Post Davis AJ, Crittenden B, Cohen E. Effects of social support on performance outputs and perceived difficulty during physical exercise. Physiol Behav. 2021 Oct 1;239:113490. doi: 10.1016/j.physbeh.2021.113490. Epub 2021 Jun 15. PMID: 34139269. The role of social support and social identification in challenge and threat, perceived stress, and life satisfaction. Jamie C. Gillman, Martin J. Turner, Matthew J. Slater First published: 11 July 2024 https://doi.org/10.1111/spc3.12982 Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Why Leaving the “Good Guy” Feels So Hard | 07 Oct 2025 | 01:36:56 | |
Episode 77: This episode is the culmination of a three-part exploration into one of the most emotionally tangled questions I see women face: Should I stay, or is it okay to leave... even if he’s a good man? If you haven’t read the two preceding articles on Substack, I urge you to begin there. Those pieces lay the emotional and historical groundwork for what we’re unraveling here. In today’s conversation, I shift into a different energy—one of empathy, nuance, and quiet truth-telling. This is the softer side of the good guy dilemma. Less fire, more warmth. Because I know what it’s like to be caught in that mental and emotional spin. I lived it. And I know how isolating and confusing it can be when the relationship looks enviable from the outside, but on the inside, something in you feels like it’s slowly dying. Together, we dive into the subtle, and not-so-subtle, ways that codependency, patriarchal programming, and inherited narratives shape how we think about partnership, sacrifice, and what we’re allowed to want. I walk you through four major thought patterns that keep women stuck in indecision, and I gently challenge the beliefs that whisper, “You’re selfish,” or “You’re asking for too much.” But most of all, this episode is an offering of grounding. Of helping you see your thoughts for what they are—just thoughts—and giving you tools to start rewriting your story from a place of self-love and personal truth. We talk about grief. We talk about discomfort. We talk about how to hold the reality that he might be a “good guy” and not the right fit for the life you feel called toward. And I share what ultimately helped me untangle my own knot of guilt, fear, and hope years ago. This is not about telling you what to do. It’s about helping you get clear enough to choose—truly choose—for yourself. So if you’re in the middle of this dilemma, come sit with me. Let’s sift through the noise together. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Why I Wish Every Woman Getting a Divorce was Divorcing “The Good Guy” The Paradox (and Privilege) of Divorcing “The Good Guy” Untamed - Glennon Doyle “Descansos” Chapter 12 - Marking Territory: The Boundaries of Rage & Forgiveness - Women Who Run with the Wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Woman Archetype - Clarissa Pinkola Estés Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Six Years Out: 7 Things I Never Expected After Divorce | 23 Sep 2025 | 01:37:26 | |
Episode 76: It’s been six years since I made one of the hardest decision of my life and walked away from my marriage. I didn’t have a roadmap. I didn’t know what the future would hold. I only knew that the life I was living no longer reflected who I truly was. This week, I’m honoring what I now call my Divorceversary by sharing the seven most unexpected truths that have unfolded since that day. Some of them are painful. Some are quietly miraculous. All of them have shaped me in ways I couldn’t have imagined. I open up about the raw financial realities of rebuilding after divorce and the crazy turn of events that led to me keeping my home when I was sure I wouldn’t. I speak honestly about the moment I lost myself in an abusive relationship again—even after leaving. And I celebrate the parts of my life that have bloomed in ways I didn’t know were possible, including the healing of my relationship with my body, my sexuality, and the kind of love I never thought I’d get to live with each and every day now. This episode is for every woman who is wondering what might happen if she chooses herself. It is a reflection on what it means to lose the life you thought you were supposed to have and discover the life that was waiting for you all along. It’s not a perfect journey. But it’s real. And more than anything, it’s yours to write. Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Do You Really Want a Divorce — or Are You in a CPTSD Flashback? | 16 Sep 2025 | 01:41:56 | |
This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit stayorgo.substack.com Episode 75: This might be the most personal, profound episode I’ve recorded yet. If you’ve ever found yourself swinging between moments of calm clarity and then suddenly feeling overwhelmed by hopelessness, confusion or dread, you are not alone. You may be experiencing complex post-traumatic stress disorder (CPTSD), and understanding that can change everything. In this episode, I expand on a concept I first introduced in Episode 60 — the "rooms" in our internal psychological mansion — and finally answer the two big questions I left hanging. How do we end up in these rooms? And how do we actually work with those parts of ourselves and begin to heal? You'll hear three very real flashback experiences from my own life. I walk you through how I knew I was in a flashback, what it looked like, and the exact tools I used to come back to myself. From breathwork and somatic grounding to a powerful EFT tapping practice (yes, with help from ChatGPT — and yes, I’m sharing the full protocol with my paid Substack subscribers), this episode is packed with what actually works. 🧘♀️✨ We also talk about what it means to be in a relationship when you have CPTSD — and why one of the most important parts of your stay-or-go decision might be whether your partner can help you regulate or if they’re the one triggering your flashbacks. This episode is an invitation to stop thinking of yourself as broken and start recognizing what’s really happening inside your body and mind. You are not your rooms. You can learn to step out of them and return to the grounded, whole, connected version of yourself. 💛 Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Episode 60 - Rooms We've Inherited + Summer of Transformation Episode 11 - Unmanaged Complex PTSD: How It Affects Your Life & Relationships Episode 24 - Feel First, Decide Later: Emotions as the Key to Divorce Clarity - Part 2 Complex PTSD: From Surviving To Thriving - Pete Walker No Bad Parts - Robert Schwartz Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive | |||
| When You’re Worried That You’re the Only Safe Parent | 09 Sep 2025 | 01:39:25 | |
Episode 74: This week, Quinn and I return for one of our most raw, personal conversations yet. If last week was about divorcing a “good guy,” this episode is about the harder truth: what happens when the man you married becomes an unpredictable, even unsafe, co-parent? Quinn opens up about her post-divorce reality—one that began with hopes of peaceful co-parenting and shared holidays, and ended in CPS reports, protective orders, and having to reckon with a parenting plan that only worked on paper. We talk through what it really looks like when you can’t control your ex… and what to do when your worst fears start playing out in real time. This one is for every woman who has lived as the buffer—protecting her children from the volatility of their father—and is now wondering how to keep them safe when she’s no longer in the house. We explore: ✨ How to separate real risk from trauma-fueled fear🛠️ Equipping your kids to advocate for themselves when you can't be there⚖️ Working with (and around) the legal system—without letting it run your life💔 Grieving the co-parenting fantasy you once believed was possible📉 Letting go of the illusion of control (even over the story your kids will tell)🔥 The shame of “how did I choose this person?”—and how to metabolize it🧠 Why your sanity—not your sacrifice—is the most essential gift you can give your children📚 The lifelong skill of rewriting your story and modeling that for your kids This is not an episode about perfection or conscious uncoupling. It’s about the truth: the painful, beautiful, messy, liberating truth. And what’s possible when you stop spinning in fantasy, face reality, and reclaim your power. You’re not alone in this. And it is survivable. Come listen. Show Notes Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Post-Divorce Glow-Up Show Spotify Post-Divorce Glow-Up Show Apple Email for questions: decide@stayorgocoaching.com Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Why You’re in Agony Over Shared Custody (And What Helps) | 02 Sep 2025 | 01:42:00 | |
Episode 73: I sat down with my bestie Quinn to unpack one of the biggest emotional hurdles so many of us face but rarely speak out loud: What do I do with the heartbreak of not having my kids with me all the time? This two-part episode was sparked by a powerful listener email that stopped me in my tracks. She put into words the raw grief and fear that can hit you hard when you imagine your children living part of their lives without you… especially when you don’t fully trust the other parent. Quinn and I come at this from very different mothering frameworks — and y’all, the magic is in that contrast. Together, we dig into: * 🧠 Why that gut-wrenching pain isn’t just biology — it’s cultural, generational, and deeply conditioned * 👩👦👦 What emotional adulthood really looks like when your kids are with their other parent * 💌 Tender rituals to stay connected without handing your emotional regulation over to your kids * 🧳 Practical tools for transitions, co-regulation, and redefining what motherhood looks like in two homes * 🎢 The surprising gifts of shared custody (yes, they exist!), including how it builds resilience in your kids * 🧘♀️ Nervous system regulation when the ache hits (“I miss them so much it hurts”) * 📖 Redefining “good mom” energy — from martyrdom to sovereignty and self-trust * 🔁 Reframing that double bind: Stay and suffer? Go and lose time? Nope, babe. There is a third way. I also get really real about what this has looked like in my life — including the process this year of my oldest son wanting to live primarily with his dad and what it took to accept and facilitate that. It wasn’t easy, and I’m still processing as we go, but I share some around how I managed my mind and found a way to anchor myself in the long game. Whether you’re navigating shared custody, trying to reclaim your identity beyond motherhood, or just feeling the weight of missing your kids — these episodes are for you. ✨ Part 2 of this conversation, dropping next week, is available exclusively to my paid subscribers on Substack! So if you haven’t signed up yet, head to the show notes to join us there. This is the kind of work that changes lives — yours and your children’s 💌🌱. Show Notes Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Post-Divorce Glow-Up Show Spotify Post-Divorce Glow-Up Show Apple Email for questions: decide@stayorgocoaching.com Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Receiving: The Radical Act Women Are Denied (+ Our Move to Substack) | 26 Aug 2025 | 01:28:47 | |
Episode 72: Y’all… this episode is a BIG one! 🎉✨ The anticipation has been real, and I’m finally sharing all the juicy details about the podcast’s move to Substack—plus, a chance for YOU to win a free 90-minute coaching session with me! 🎁🔥 But let’s be real—this episode is about so much more than a platform shift. This is a deep dive into something that’s been transforming my life: RECEIVING. 💌 I’m talking about how hard, uncomfortable, and even vulnerable it can be to receive love, support, help, praise—and why it’s absolutely essential if you're going to become the woman you’re meant to be. Especially for those of you stuck in caretaker roles, exhausted from constantly pouring out without ever being poured into… this episode is your wake-up call. 🛑💡 We unpack why patriarchy has stolen women’s ability to receive, what happens when we start reclaiming it, and how receiving isn't just some fluffy self-care vibe—it's RADICAL and NECESSARY. 💥💪 And, in a moment that had me fully practicing what I preach, I read your beautiful listener emails aloud. 🥹💖 I let myself receive your gratitude, your love, and your stories—and babes, it was a full-body experience. Vulnerable as hell and SO powerful. Then, of course, I walk you through what Substack is, why I’m moving there, and how this shift is deeply aligned with my next evolution—more connection, more intention, more YOU. 💫 👀 Don’t miss the deets on how to subscribe (there’s even a founding member option for my legacy-building babes 🙌) and how to enter the 90-minute coaching giveaway! So if you’ve been feeling worn out, unseen, or like your needs have been pushed to the backburner for way too long… this is your episode. 🎙️💥 Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Email for questions: decide@stayorgocoaching.com Dying for Sex - Hulu Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| The Life You Want Most IS Possible, but it Takes Choosing YOU First | 19 Aug 2025 | 01:10:49 | |
Episode 71: Hey babes 💛 This one poured out of me on a Friday night with dusk falling outside my window 🌅 because I couldn’t not record it. This episode is my full-body YES to the truth that the life you want most? It's not only possible—it’s happening faster than ever before 🚀💥 I’m opening the door and letting you peek into a totally ordinary, magical day in my life—one I never would’ve dreamed was possible back when I was considering divorce. You’ll hear about everything from flashbacks and Five Guys 🍔 to tarot cards and raising our black cat baby 🐈⬛ with Joe, and how I’ve built a life that feels like me in all the right ways. I’ll also share the stories of two beautiful women, one client and one new community member, who reminded me just how brave, powerful, and world-changing this path is when we start choosing ourselves first 💖 PLUS I’ll let you in on a big shift coming to the podcast 👀 (no more cliffhangers, I promise!) and how we’re building something so much bigger than just our own healing. It’s a movement, and I’m honored to be in it with you 🙏🔥 Whether you're in the thick of deciding, knee-deep in grief, or just catching glimpses of your power again, I want you to know: you’re not crazy, you’re not alone, and the life you want most is already whispering your name ✨ Let’s dive in, babes 🧡 Show Notes: Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| When Husbands Don't "Lose Their Sh*t" During Divorce: A Success Story | 12 May 2026 | 01:13:09 | |
Episode 106: In this episode, I sit down with a woman from inside the Stay or Go community whose journey reveals the quiet, physical toll of living a life that only looks good on paper. This is not a story about a high-conflict disaster. It is a story about the “box-checking” trap—the graduation, the career, the marriage, and the home—and the realization that checking every box can still leave you completely empty. We explore what it looks like to finally listen to your own skin. To acknowledge the panic attacks that strike on the commute home and the GI issues that signal a deep internal misalignment. We dig into the grit it takes to build an exit strategy while pregnant, choosing to “be selfish” by investing in your own education and healing so that you—and your children—can eventually breathe. At the center of this conversation is a startlingly beautiful observation of human maturity. The belief so many women carry is that telling the truth will inevitably lead to a “shit show” of aggression and shaming. But through Jaguar’s experience, we see a rare and thrilling alternative. We witness what happens when a husband chooses respect over ego, allowing a marriage to dissolve at a barroom table with a pen, a plan, and a profound sense of grace. Through her story, you will hear what it means to move from performance to presence. The terror of the filing, the vulnerability of the “final blow,” and the liberation of the first two months on the other side. You will hear how her choice didn’t just end a marriage, but birthed a collaborative friendship that actually serves her family. This episode is not about staying or going. It is about the radical act of reclaiming your own exploration and trusting your body when it says it is time to move. ✨ Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Considering Divorce? Your Check Engine Light Is ON: Don’t Wait for the Breakdown | 12 Aug 2025 | 01:37:54 | |
Episode 70: Hey babe 💛—whether you’re out walking, driving, curled up in bed, this one’s for you. In this week’s episode, I’m sharing the story of my own “roadside test” last week—when my middle son broke his arm at football practice—and the big wake-up it gave me about what happens when we ignore the check engine lights in our lives. 🚨 From cars to life to marriages, those little warning lights are trying to tell us something… and pretending they’re not there doesn’t make them go away. We’re talking: 💪 Why it’s time to stop waiting for the breakdown before we take action. This is part rallying cry, part heart-to-heart, and part practical “get under the hood” moment. You’ll walk away with a loving push to handle what’s asking for your attention—so that when life throws the next roadside test at you, you’re not running on fumes. So, deep breath, big girl panties (or not—your choice, babe 😏), and let’s get into it. You’ve got this. 💛 Show Notes: Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Why You Give Grace to Everyone but Yourself & the Mindset Shift from Expectation to Exploration | 05 Aug 2025 | 01:20:28 | |
Episode 69: Hey, my loves! 💕 This week’s episode emerged from a comment shared with me by one of my community members and I cannot wait for you to dive into the goodies that came out of it with me. We’re talking about something BIG—moving from an expectation mindset (hello control + perfectionism 👋) into an exploration mindset that gives you SPACE to breathe, play, and actually be human. 🌱 So many of us, especially as women, are living under crushing double standards. We give everyone else so much grace—our kids, our partners, even strangers—yet hold ourselves to impossibly high bars. And when we dig deeper, we see how this is rooted in childhood trauma, cultural programming, and patriarchal BS. 🙅♀️ I’m going to share: This episode is part pep talk, part permission slip, and 100% your reminder that you were never meant to be perfect—you were meant to BECOME. 💫 Grab your headphones, take a deep breath, and let’s reclaim that juicy, curious, messy, ALIVE version of you. You deserve this. ❤️ Show Notes: The Man Music Video - Taylor Swift Ejaculate Responsibly: A Whole New Way to Think About Abortion - Gabrielle Stanley Blair The Crane Wife - CJ Hauser The Tragedy of Heterosexuality - Jane Ward Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life: Life-Changing Tools for Healthy Relationships - Marshall B. Rosenberg PhD Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| When Life Doesn’t Go as Planned: How to Detox From Your Favorite Drug: Control | 29 Jul 2025 | 01:09:08 | |
Episode 68: Hello, my loves! 💕 This week, I’m coming to you straight from the messy middle—yep, that foggy, disorienting space where life says, “LOL, nope!” to all your perfectly laid plans. 😅 If you’ve ever found yourself wondering, “How the hell did I end up here?” or if you’re navigating the collapsing scaffolding of a life you thought was secure (hello, divorce consideration crew 🙋♀️), this episode is for YOU. We’re talking about: I’m sharing my own real-time journey of uncertainty, grief, and yes… hope. 💫 If you’re in the in-between right now, feeling like you’re free-falling without a net, please know you are not alone. There is refuge. There is magic ahead. And spoiler alert: the magic always comes when we lean into trust. 💖 Take a deep breath with me. You are safe in this moment. Let’s walk this unknown road together. 🌈 Show Notes: Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||
| Permission to Be in Process | 22 Jul 2025 | 00:13:29 | |
Episode 67: Hey loves 💗, This week’s episode is a little different—short, unfiltered, and deeply vulnerable. I hit record right in the middle of my own "tower moment" (yep, for my tarot friends out there, that card 🌩️), where everything feels like it’s crumbling... and I’m letting it. Instead of packaging my process into a neatly wrapped episode with clear takeaways, I’m inviting you into the middle of the mess with me. This is me practicing what I preach—laying down the role of the “one who always holds it together” and learning to surrender to what I can’t control 😮💨💔. If you’re also in a season of uncertainty, fear, or raw transformation, I hope this gives you permission to breathe, to stop fixing, and to just be where you are. Sometimes, the bravest thing we can do is admit we’re not okay... and trust that it’s still enough 💞. I love you all so much. Thanks for being part of this sacred space. May you feel seen, held, and deeply worthy—even in the mess. xo, Britta 💕✨ Show Notes: Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe | |||