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It’s time we talked about the mental load. Again. 💌 To join our journaling club, with 9,900+ others, subscribe to my imperfect email - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ Consider this a companion episode to our infamous, most shared episode of 2023, The Elephant in the Relationship where Hugh and Penny introduced us to their mental load, and how they were trying to make it more equal in their relationship. Today we’re sprinkling in some expertise and scientific data, as we’re joined by Professor Leah Ruppanner who explains to Hugh, Ryan and Josh that there’s actually 8 different types of mental load, and not all of them are draining. Bringing examples from their own lives, Hugh, Ryan and Josh discuss with Leah why the mental load can seem like an insurmountable amount of emotional thinking, and how partners can better communicate to reduce anxiety-like symptoms and burnout. We chat to Leah about the exacerbation of the mental load when chronic illness becomes part of the equation, and how to manage the mental load when there is no one to share it with. Chapters 00:00:00 – TRAILER 00:02:02 – The Mental Load is life changing for relationships 00:03:11 – Mental Load definition: emotional thinking work 00:05:41 – 3 characteristics of the mental load 00:08:00 – Mental Load vs Burnout: Treat Your Energy Like a Budget 00:14:19 – The Elephant in Hugh & Penny’s Relationship 00:16:50 – Type 1: Life Organisation 00:17:20 – Type 2: Emotional Support 00:18:00 – Type 3: Relationship Hygiene 00:19:03 – Type 4: Dream Building 00:20:26 – Type 5: Magic Making 00:25:00 – Type 6: Individual Upkeep 00:27:30 – Type 7: Safety 00:28:00 – Type 8: Meta Care (Doom Scrolling and the Mental Load) 00:29:56 – How to do a mental load audit with your partner 00:34:09 – Align your energy with your goals 00:36:25 – Delegating tasks vs sharing the mental load 00:38:24 – Shift work vs running the business 00:40:30 – Birthday presents and the perfect mother myth 00:41:30 – Mess: do men really not see it? 00:44:50 – Why women feel judged 00:48:41 – “Good enough is good enough” 00:54:13 – Mental load in same sex couples 00:57:07 – Why perspective + empathy matters 00:58:13 – Mental load when you’re single, or your partner won’t engage 00:59:02 – What a cancer diagnosis does for priorities 01:05:45 – A Little More Imperfects: Mental Load at Work 🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Hugh & Penny - The Elephant in the Relationship - https://bit.ly/4zNi0C4 📚Things to read Drained, by Leah Ruppanner (this one has the audit in it) - https://bit.ly/47RUyI5 Motherlands, by Lead Ruppanner - https://bit.ly/3WjSCW0 Men do see the mess, study by Leah Ruppanner et al. - https://bit.ly/4dTCaSq Cognitive + Emotional Labour, research by Leah Ruppanner et al. - https://bit.ly/4eN3HFo 📺 Things to watch Inside Out - https://bit.ly/4yx5mG4 🂱 Things to do Fair Play Cards - https://bit.ly/3UFeWZK 💝 Breast Cancer Support Breast Cancer Network Australia - https://bit.ly/4igX8fj McGrath Foundation - 1800 183 338 Think Pink Foundation - https://www.thinkpink.org.au 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

In the end, Matt Nable wished his brother would give in. Motor neurone disease had taken everything, except his brother’s will to live. 💌 To join our journaling club, with 9,000+ others, subscribe to my imperfect email - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ Joining us in the studio today is writer, actor, boxer, and former rugby league player, Matt Nable. Recognisable for playing infamous tough guys on screen (Arrow, Underbelly, The Dry), Matt’s experience of loss and mental ill health has starkly redefined what he believes it is to ‘be a man’. Using the analogy of a ‘double edged sword’, Matt explains his experience with bipolar and hypomania, and how those periods have lead to the best, and worst, decisions of his life. Matt is incredibly generous in sharing his experience of biological melancholia depression, and explores with Josh just how quickly everything can seem to unravel. Matt speaks about the immense grief he carries for his brother who passed away MND, and how he was able to move through this grief to find purpose and compassion. *Content Warning: today's episode includes a discussion about psilocybin. In Australia, psilocybin is a controlled substance. Outside of authorised clinical settings, its use, possession and supply are illegal. This episode is not medical advice, and we're not encouraging or endorsing illegal drug use. Psilocybin can carry serious risks, particularly when taken without professional screening and supervision. Our guest's experience is their own and won't be typical of everyone's. This episode also mentions suicide. If you're struggling with grief or your mental health, please speak with your GP or a mental health professional. 🚨If you, or someone you know, are experiencing suicidal thoughts call lifeline on 13 11 14. In an emergency, call 000. Chapters 00:00:00 – TRAILER 00:02:48 – Childhood shapes who we are 00:03:40 – What does it really mean to be tough? 00:07:38 – Why Matt doesn’t think he is a tough man 00:09:21 – Redefining Masculinity, and Rejecting the Manosphere 00:12:00 – Letting Go of Ego 00:13:34 – Losing his brother to MND 00:20:40 – A Psilocybin Retreat for Grief: Matt’s Experience 00:23:08 – Meeting his younger self 00:24:09 – Reaching Acceptance 00:28:34 – Figuring out what really matters 00:35:12 – A brother’s love: Hugh & Josh reflect 00:38:55 – Finding humour in grief 00:40:34 – A Parent’s Grief vs a Sibling’s Grief 00:41:30 – The Meaning of Matt’s Tattoos 00:42:10 – Bipolar II + Melancholic Depression Diagnosis 00:43:46 – Hypomania: The Double-Edged Sword 00:46:52 – Matt’s rise to fame 00:51:10 – Bipolar vs Depression: The Crash, Exhaustion + Regret 00:52:34 – Sitting with someone in the dark 00:54:08 – The Quicksand of Men’s Mental Health 00:56:02 – Standing on the Edge: Josh’s Story 00:58:01 – Finding Joy in the Small Moments 01:01:29 – Writing as an Anchor Point 01:07:29 – Why men need to be vulnerable 01:07:59 – Journaling Club “How would you like to be remembered?” Some other great resources are below Black Dog Institute - https://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au Beyond Blue - https://www.beyondblue.org.au 📚Things to read Mire, by Matt Nable - https://bit.ly/4hYglT0 Other books by Matt Nable - https://bit.ly/4dI1uut 📺 Things to watch The Final Winter - https://bit.ly/4s3EYSC Things to donate to Fight MND - https://fightmnd.org.au 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. Trailer footage sourced from Mr Inbetween.

This is not your mother’s perimenopause. 💌 To join our journaling club, subscribe to my imperfect email - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ Joined by guest host Zoë Foster Blake, and Dr Fatima Khan, we’re diving head first into perimenopause: the what, the why, and the how-the-f**k to deal with it. Typically beginning in your late 30’s, and in your brain of all places, perimenopause symptoms include heightened anxiety, irritability, sleep disturbances, brain fog … all things that make you feel further and further away from your best self. Beginning 5 -7 years BEFORE your last menstrual period, perimenopause can coincide with postpartum, the most important presentation of your career to date, and the uncovering of neurodivergence, which may have been painstakingly masked until this shift in hormones. With the expertise of Dr Fatima, and the lived experience of Zoë, we hope this episode makes you feel seen, less alone, and ready to have THAT conversation with your GP. Chapters 00:00:00 The Truth of Perimenopause [TRAILER] 00:01:09 The Meet Cute of Zoe Foster Blake and Dr Fatima Khan 00:06:55 Is this Perimenopause? Early Signs + Symptoms 00:07:41 Zoe’s Perimenopause Journey: No Sleep, Anxiety, Rage, Repeat. 00:09:56 Volcanic Rage, Explained 00:14:59 What Doctor’s Miss: Misdiagnosis + Antidepressants 00:15:57 Why Your Husband Is Breathing Too Loud 00:20:18 Perimenopause Mental Health Screening 00:21:25 Debunking the “You’re Too Young” Myth 00:23:43 Is it Anxiety? Depression? Perimenopause? 00:25:26 The Pill, The Mirena + The Modern Woman in Peri 00:30:44 Loosing Yourself in Peri: Brain Fog + Dementia Fears 00:32:10 The Importance of Testosterone 00:36:00 HRT Myths: Re-educating a generation 00:39:04 A Script for a Script: What to say to your GP 00:41:12 Perimenopause Is a Multi-Organ Syndrome 00:46:09 High Achieving Women + Peri = Shame 00:46:47 When Perimenopause Unmasks Your ADHD 00:54:26 Trauma Reactivation in Perimenopause 00:57:17 Pills + Skills: Why HRT Alone Isn’t Enough 00:58:41 The Longevity of It All 01:00:30 Nutrition 📚Things to read Group Chat, by Zoë Foster Blake - https://bit.ly/4efqR70 Hormone Health is Mental Health, by Dr Fatima Khan - https://bit.ly/4j6G2Ts 💻Things to check out Australasian Menopause Society - menopause.org.au Meno-D questionnaire - https://bit.ly/3Toj3sN Zela Wellbeing - https://bit.ly/4ARGFXu 🎧Imperfects episodes for MORE on hormones Zoë Foster Blake - Zero Lucks Given - https://bit.ly/4y8xwHx Dr Louise Newson - Maybe it’s Menopause - https://bit.ly/4i7xM3F Dr Louise Newson - It’s Hormones. Period. - https://bit.ly/47ya9w2 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

Angie’s OCD obsessions are that she has committed her worst, most insidious, fears. 💌 Join 9,500+ others in our newsletter community - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ Officially diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) when she was 19, some of Angie’s earliest memories are of obsessions, compulsions and seeking reassurance. Joining us in the studio, Angie talks to Hugh, Ryan and Josh about the reality of living with OCD, how she navigates particularly bad episodes with her partner, and why she wouldn’t wish it on her worst enemy Angie explains false memories, and the lengths she has gone to seek reassurance, and finally, why it is so important to her to create something that helps people feel less alone. In amongst all of the OCD chat, Hugh asks Angie about her anti-discrimination work and the beautiful story of where that passion came from. Chapters 00:00:00 – Trailer 00:01:27 – Angie + Hugh don’t do small talk 00:03:46 – Why Angie accepted an ARIA on behalf of Sia 00:05:45 – Growing Up in Sporting Royalty 00:07:45 – Why Angie’s Brother Came Out To Her 00:10:41 – “I’m Crying Because I Could Have Helped” 00:13:21 – Why Feeling Safe To Be Yourself Matters 00:15:02 – Angie’s Moral Compass: Where Does It Come From? 00:18:17 – OCD: Obsessions, Compulsions + Reassurance 00:20:45 – OCD Stereotypes vs Reality 00:22:52 – Feeling Like A Bad Kid 00:24:52 – Why OCD Makes Your Excruciatingly Self-Aware 00:28:02 – Examples of Intrusive Thoughts 00:30:23 – Invisible Compulsions: Kissing, Hugging, Incest 00:32:19 – Relationship OCD: Constant Fear of Cheating On Your Partner 00:34:37 – OCD False Memories: How The Brain Builds ‘Evidence’ 00:36:10 – Why Reassurance Seeking Never Brings Relief 00:39:13 – What It’s Like Loving Someone With OCD 00:41:40 – What OCD Has Cost Angie: Peace, Presence + Precious Moments 00:50:08 – Why Getting The Right Treatment Was Lifechanging 00:54:52 – What Exposure Response Prevention (ERP) Actually Looks Like 00:57:02 – How To Support Someone With OCD 00:59:01 – How Angie and Her Husband Manage OCD Episodes 01:02:53 – Finding Your People Through OCD 01:05:15 – How To Respond When Someone Tells You They Have OCD 01:08:24 – Tips for Supporting Someone Who Has OCD 🧠If you, or someone you know, has been diagnosed with or thinks they may have OCD, these are some great resources. In an emergency, always call 000. OCD BOUNCE - https://ocd.org.au OCD WA - https://www.ocdwa.com.au International OCD Foundation - https://iocdf.org The Joy Thief, by Penny Moodie - https://bit.ly/3VJaKZ4 It’s Not What You Think podcast - https://bit.ly/4iZppcj LifeLine - 13 11 14 🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Penny Moodie - Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) - https://bit.ly/4jxTPTd Penny Moodie’s New Book - OCD & Finding Joy Again - https://bit.ly/4rGXkJa Rick Davies - Living with OCD - https://bit.ly/4hxuLZY Issac Humphries - Coming Out On Court - https://bit.ly/3VZDHQA 💻Things to check out Andrea Wallace’s Website - https://wonderpsychology.com Angie Greene’s Website - angiegreene.com.au 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

Mid 20's and $250,000 in debt. Gripped by a gambling addiction. How do you recover? 💌 Join 9,500+ others in our newsletter community - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ From the outside, it looked like Luke Bateman was living the dream: a professional NRL career with ludicrous pay checks and sponsorship deals. On the inside, Luke was battling a crippling gambling addiction, deepening depression and a widening chasm between the character he was playing, and his true authentic self. With immense courage, honesty and vulnerability, Luke takes Hugh, Ryan and Josh through the ups and downs of his recovery journey. Luke unpicks the difference between unconditional love and conditional help from his parents, and why his time in rehab was the best thing that ever happened to him. Luke speaks about how his journey with addiction impacted his relationship with his mum, and the gratitude he feels for her now, and how learning about internal family systems changed his life forever. Luke, you are such a beautiful person. Thank you for joining us today. This episode discusses gambling addiction and suicidal ideation. Please take care when listening. This episode is part of the BE HOPE Podcast Takeover, bringing podcasts around the world together to explore the themes of hope and how we can continue to make progress in a rapidly changing world - https://globalgoals.org/behope/ 🚨If you, or someone you know is struggling with a gambling addiction Call LifeLine - 13 11 14 Register at BetStop - betstop.gov.au Gamblers Anonymous - https://bit.ly/3TJ1C6d Gambling Help Online - gamblinghelponline.org.au In an emergency, always call 000 🩵To hear our chat with Luke about The Manosphere and to join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects 0:00 – Trailer: $250K of Gambling Debt 1:26 – Be Hope Podcast Takeover Announcement 4:15 – Luke Bateman doesn’t fit in a box 6:06 – Growing up ‘soft’ in Rural Queensland 10:03 – Hiding Books from the Boys 17:11 – The Shame of Reading 19:22 – Chasing a Dream to Fill the Void 22:26 – Money, Drugs & Alcohol in Professional Sport 27:40 – Lies, Debt & Betting Company ‘VIP’ Treatment 30:26 – Should Gambling Sponsorship Be Banned? 31:11 – Rock Bottom 33:18 – The Phone Call That Saved His Life 39:45 – Rehab, Recovery + Relinquishing Control 43:40 – Inside Rehab “Get a Real Addiction” 47:21 – Recovery Is Not Linear 50:21 – Internal Family Systems: Healing the exiled child 56:05 – Generational Masculinity: Why Men Struggle to Connect 58:19 – Denial + Corporate Greed 1:03:13 – Luke’s Honesty Policy 1:06:08 – Unconditional Love vs Conditional Help 1:10:18 – Sharing Shame with Teammates 1:11:37 – Luke’s Message to Anyone Struggling Right Now 1:13:03 – Finding Your Way Back 🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode Jack’s Gambling Addiction Story - https://bit.ly/4hFQmk1 📚Things to read The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane, by Kate DiCamillo - https://bit.ly/46FkS7v Keys to the Kingdom, by Garth Nix - https://bit.ly/4AnBxKB The Midnight Library, by Matt Haig - https://bit.ly/4d2Ozmx No Bad Parts, by Richard C Scharwtz - https://bit.ly/46FSGkU You Are The One You’ve Been Waiting For, by Richard C Schwartz - https://bit.ly/3Tp0gx8 🎧Things to listen to In The Good Books with Luke Bateman I Matt Haig: Writing What You Need to Hear - https://bit.ly/4jjvBvK 📱Things to check out Luke’s Instagram (and his thoughts on male silence) - https://bit.ly/46AnIuy 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Do you live in fear of being found out as a fraud? That despite your years of competency, achievement and high performance someone will uncover the truth? Well, you’re in the right place. Our resident psychologist Dr Emily Musgrove is here to tell you that your imposter syndrome is nothing to be afraid of. In fact, it’s not even a syndrome. 💌 Get practical take-aways from this episode, and join 9,400+ others in our newsletter community - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ To get a little bit meta, Dr Emily explains that knowing that you don’t know everything, is a good thing. Especially if you’re starting a new role, or trying something for the first time. HOWEVER, the long-term consequences of the imposter cycle such as perfectionism, overcompensation, burnout, or even avoidance and procrastination, may impact your willingness to say yes to new opportunities, such as going for that promotion or asking for support. In this episode, Dr Emily asks Hugh, Ryan and Josh to think about the balance of their competence and confidence, and provides them (and you!) with four practical strategies for combatting this pesky phenomenon. And then, a weird amount of chat about Vlad the Impaler. 0:00 – An Emisode! 2:41 – Adam Grant is not an imposter 5:11 – Origins of Imposter Syndrome 6:45 – ‘Syndrome’ is the wrong word 8:19 – It all comes back to belonging 10:39 – How common is imposter syndrome? 12:20 – Fear of being found out as a fraud 15:16 – The evolutionary psychology of belonging and self-doubt 16:35 – Is self-doubt actually healthy? 17:42 – Is your confidence a mask? 18:57 – The Dunning-Kruger Effect 23:15 – The more you know …. 25:12 – Competence vs confidence 26:29 – The Imposter Cycle: anxiety, perfectionism, luck 32:09 – Becoming your own favourite artist 35:55 – Avoidance, procrastination + self-fulfilling prophecies 38:29 – Long term consequences ft. Hugh’s anus 45:26 – Authenticity as the antidote 46:22 – Less growth, less promotions 48:52 – Strategy 1: write down your skills 49:53 – Strategy 2: name your shame 51:40 – Supporting a friend with imposter phenomenon 52:29 – Self-doubt in a new role is a good sign 57:12 – Strategy 3: mentor a near peer 1:00:38 – Strategy 4: celebrate your success 1:02:57 – Creating a good workplace culture 1:04:06 – Belonging is good for business 1:06:25 – Want more on belonging? Dr Em, thanks for joining us. 🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode Adam Grant - The Potential of Your Potential - https://bit.ly/4jc0DFM Dr Emily - We’re Longing for Belonging - https://bit.ly/4yElLJp Rana Hussain - Belonging for Connection - http://bit.ly/4odhGY8 Esther Perel - It’s Not Them, It’s You - https://bit.ly/4yxgljs 🎧Things to listen to The Curiosity Shop with Brene Brown and Adam Grant - https://bit.ly/4gT05mW 📖Things to read Hidden Potential, by Adam Grant - https://bit.ly/4AemQcv Hardwiring Happiness, by Rick Hanson - https://bit.ly/3T6IhM0 📺 Things to watch Mad Men - https://bit.ly/4cLB6zx 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When he was 15, Andy Lee’s mum forgot who he was. 💌 Join 9,400+ others in our newsletter community - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ Given only two weeks to live, Andy tells Hugh, Ryan and Josh how this news impacted his family, impacted his childhood, and continues to impact his sense of self. And then, we’re going all the way back to the early days of Radio Karate, and Hamish & Andy. In a long overdue conversation (recorded, of course), Ryan and Andy chat about their own friendship dynamic and why they both felt like the odd one out. Getting down to business, Andy and Ryan discuss how a bunch of 20 year old guys made tough financial decisions while trying to remain mates, how they learnt to give constructive criticism to each other, and with the blessing of hindsight, how they feel about that time now. Andy, we’ve been waiting for this episode longer than a baker with his oven off. 0:00 – 2 years of secret vocal coaching 4:35 – HOW long for one cartoon episode? 5:48 – When Andy met Hamish (and Ryan) 9:39 – The impact of getting cancelled after 5 episodes 10:08 – The best advice Andy received 14:07 – Jealousy, Jealousy 20:25 – The Four Way Split of Hamish & Andy 23:42 – Should we be recording this? 25:10 – Social media has replaced the paparazzo 26:11 – Andy’s nude photo scandal 30:23 – Inspiration and renegotiation 36:55 – The Vulnerabilitea House 38:02 – When your mum is given two weeks to live 40:30 – Rapid deterioration and rush to hospital 43:28 – Taking on the parent role at 15 46:04 – Furious at the new normal 49:09 – Why “Don’t Worry, It’ll Be Fine” is the worst thing to say 54:36 – Andy’s Dad’s incredible sacrifice 58:20 – The Lee Gazette 1:00:50 – Why we should talk about will’s 🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode Ryan Shelton - Shame, Jealousy & Purpose - https://bit.ly/4A230B5 📺 Things to watch Institute of Sayings from Real Stories - https://bit.ly/4xBJHgq Do Not Watch This Show! - https://bit.ly/4cAwlIZ New Zealand Spy - https://bit.ly/4hdjPBI 🎧Things to listen to Andy Lee on Falling Upwards with Kate Langbroek - https://bit.ly/4yucp30 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Have you ever watched the person you love most get everything you ever wanted? Did you harden around envy, or shrink with comparison? Were you able to find happiness for their success? Philippa Northeast, Logie nominated and lead of Netflix’s My Brilliant Career, is a star quickly rising. Her most significant role? The little sister of our producer, Bridge. 💌Join 9,400+ others in our newsletter community - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Joining us as a guest host, Producer Bridge, alongside Hugh, Josh and Ryan, discuss the years of failure and rejection behind the scenes of Pip’s overnight success. Constantly aware of the need to prove herself a success, Philippa is completely vulnerable about the obsession that came from certain rejections, and her anxiety which manifested itself as trichotillomania. Offering a unique and intimate perspective, both Bridge and Josh reflect on their respective siblings’ success, and how that has shaped their own identity. It’s sibling vs sibling, and only one will make it out alive (kidding, it has a happy ending). 0:00 – Meet Producer Bridge’s Little Sister 5:43 – Pip’s Brilliant Career: From Home & Away to Netflix Star 11:39 – Middle Child Syndrome 19:28 – Sibling Comparison: Cricket and Drama Solos 20:55 – Finding Success Straight Out of High School 22:56 – Self-belief vs Self-doubt: Why Pip Took The Leap and Bridget Didn’t 25:30 – Feeling Over-shadowed, and Under Pressure 28:00 – Becoming an Unemployed Clown 29:17 – The Sensational Potter Backup Plan 34:01 – Getting Undressed (Again) 35:46 – The Hollywood Grind 37:32 – Lockdown, Isolation and Growing Doubt 46:15 – Obsession born from Rejection 51:49 – What Loneliness in the Acting Industry Feels Like 52:46 – The Body Keeps Score: Trichotillomania 54:47 – Healing: Journalling, Yoga, Grounding 57:04 – The Hallmark Offer That Changed Everything 1:03:39 – The Downside of Growing Up Next To A Rising Star 1:07:29 – Choosing Pride Over Jealousy 1:09:49 – The Upside of Losing to Claudia Karvan 🫖 Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode Claudia Karvan - Love, Her Way - https://bit.ly/3UNr9LC What’s Your ATAR? - https://bit.ly/4zQ4AG5 📺 Things to watch My Brilliant Career - https://bit.ly/4zPaW8L Family Next Door - https://bit.ly/4gEp0cw Newsreader - https://bit.ly/3UNr4ri A Royal Runaway Romance - https://bit.ly/3V8rGb2 Standing Up For Sunny - https://bit.ly/4xyeASP 🎧 Things to listen to Undressed by Sombr - https://bit.ly/4wY9Ipf 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What impact does sleep deprivation really have on your wellbeing? What about your parenting? What about your identity? Matt D’Avella has amassed over 4 millions subscribers on YouTube undertaking 30-day wellness challenges, and promoting his minimalist lifestyle. In life that was meticulously controlled, having kids changed everything. 💌Join 9,400+ others in our newsletter community - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Blessed with a baby who woke every 30 minutes for the first ten months of their life, Matt chats to Hugh, Ryan and Josh about how becoming a new parent impacted every facet of his life. Hugh and Josh share just how lonely they have felt at different times during their parenting journey, and Ryan saves the day by holding a baby for a full 40 minutes (save the applause! please!) Matt this was a dream come true. To watch the full episode on YouTube - https://youtu.be/foilZTRGXco 00:00 - I Tried Being Vulnerable for 30 Days 7:03 - Minimalism Maxxing 18:00 - The Vulnerabilitea House 20:25 - Becoming a father, losing sleep (and himself) 24:14 - Depression Diagnosis Wake-Up Call 32:56 - Hugh's Sleep Score 40:38 - SOS: Hiring Help, Expanding your Village 48:50 - Sleep Training: What Actually Works 52:02 - The Real Cost of Sleep Deprivation 58:29 - Being A Mum: The Additional Burden 1:01:32 - 'Do You Regret Having Kids?' 1:04:00 - The New and Improved Matt D'Ad-Avella 🫖Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Dr Edna Lekgabe - New Baby… New Brain… Matrescence - https://bit.ly/4zVt9Si 📺 Things to watch Minimalism Documentary - https://bit.ly/3SSZb0t Why I disappeared - Matt D’Avella - https://bit.ly/3SwYA4g Matt D’Avella YouTube - https://bit.ly/4wOzFXW 💤 Things to sleep train Tresillian Sleep Organisation - https://bit.ly/4zAGTS5 The Ferber Sleep method - https://bit.ly/4iCdqB4 Masada Sleep School - https://bit.ly/4qNi7uc 📚Things to read Regretful Parents subreddit - https://bit.ly/4gx9W0b 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

How does having cancer as a child impact the way you live as an adult? Uber successful chef and restauranteur Josh Niland doesn’t do things in halves (no, literally, have you read his book The Whole Fish?). From opening a restaurant at 26, to becoming the first Australian to win the James Beard Book of the Year award when he was just 30, Josh’s creativity came from a place of desperation to explore every opportunity presented to him. 💌Join 9,400+ people getting a Dr Emily values worksheet and takeaways from this week’s episode in our newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Diagnosed with cancer 2 days after his 8th birthday, Josh’s childhood transformed in a matter of hours into hospital hallways, chemotherapy and facing his own mortality. In this episode, Josh joins us in the Vulnerabilitea House to talk us through an experience which profoundly changed him, which he is now grateful for. Hugh, Ryan and Josh (our Josh), also ask about where his drive and ambitious creativity comes from, and just how close to failure Josh’s culinary career came. We wish this chat could have gone on longer, If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - 🫖Other Imperfect’s episodes mentioned on this episode Nathan Cavaleri - The Ups & The Blues - https://bit.ly/468HE7l 📺 Things to watch Josh’s Australian Story - https://bit.ly/4giDtKR 📚Things to read Saint Peter: Chapter & Verse, by Josh Niland - https://bit.ly/4bVM0SN The Whole Fish, by Josh Niland - https://bit.ly/4bVM0SN 🍽️ Places to eat Saint Peter - https://bit.ly/4qrs4gv 💻Things to check out Starlight Children’s Foundation - https://bit.ly/4hHDkmM Josh Niland’s Website - https://www.mrniland.com 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

Is tough love to blame for our shame? 💌Join 9,200+ people getting a Dr Emily values worksheet and takeaways from this week’s episode in our newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy We all know that parent or coach on the sideline who takes under 10’s basketball a liiitttllleee too seriously. And occasionally, tough love might seem to work in the moment, long term, the shame train isn’t going anywhere good. Dr Emily, our resident psychologist, is here to name the shame to tame it, and teach us how we can be shame strippers too (get your head out of the gutter. Shame on you). We go into the difference between shame, humiliation, guilt and embarrassment, bow down to the queen Brene Brown, and introduce ourselves to our own Healthy Adult. Shamelessly, this is one of our best episodes to date. 0:00 – Ever heard of a shame stripper? 6:27 – Bow down to Brene Brown 12:25 – The other self-conscious emotions (they’re shy) 20:51 – Humour and humiliation 29:21 – Shame is a full body experience 36:16 – Beware of who you share (with) 40:43 – Manosphere + behaviour change 46:59 – Tough love + kids sport 57:07 – Working with shame 1:06:10 – Bring on the compassion! 1:10:07 – Introducing the Healthy Adult If you’d like to watch the full episode on YouTube, follow this link - 🫖 Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode Ryan Shelton - Shame, Jealousy & Purpose - https://bit.ly/4qgEqrO Dr Emily - Compassion of The Self - https://bit.ly/4hqWa1k How do you know you’re in a thinking trap? - Maria Ruberto - https://bit.ly/4ze4eJh 🎧 Things to listen to Between Two Beers with Steven Adams - https://bit.ly/4g3wipS 📚Things to read Daring Greatly, by Brene Brown - https://bit.ly/45VT2Dx The Compassionate Mind, by Paul Gilbert - https://bit.ly/3UewPOq Movember study of the Manosphere - https://bit.ly/4wZxtOs Proneness to shame vs proneness to guilt research by Tangney et al. - https://bit.ly/4g4lQyl 📖Things to do The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook, by Kristin Neff and Christopher Germer - https://bit.ly/4zg353K Othership (breath work app) - https://bit.ly/4g7Q03E 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Can nature help us to feel less alone? 💌Join 9,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ Psychologist on the incredible, Alone Australia series (remember our seminal episode with Gina Chick?), Mark Mathieson is in the Academy of Imperfection to help us understand how nature regulates our body, and how we can reconnect to it in this digital age. Mark talks about how to uncover the person behind the persona, the science behind gardening, and why Hugh had the best sleep of his life in a tent, with no pillow. According to Mark, human are immensely capable of change, and this episode provides a few things we can do to ensure nature is incorporated into our routines, without cramming the schedule more. Mark, it was great to be alone . . . with you. If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CIMSSRJg2vQ 0:00 – Ice breaker: where have we gone wrong?6:58 – The segmentation of exercise11:46 – Evolution of Mark18:53 – Person behind the persona24:10 – Our virtual reality future27:22 – Let’s learn to adapt36:00 – Building relationships with nature42:28 – The science of gardening and sunshine48:53 – Eventually, reality TV gets us all53:08 – Big city blues 🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode Gina Chick - Don’t Fight Life - https://bit.ly/4xj0kga Sean Turnell - A Prisoner’s Guide to Life - https://bit.ly/4btNKCu Sex for Normal People with Ita O’Brien - https://bit.ly/4btNNya Dr Emily - The (pesky) Hedonistic Treadmill - https://bit.ly/4yXxx2B Dr Paul Callaghan - How To Follow The Dreaming Path - https://bit.ly/457l9PY 📚Things to read Comfort Crisis, by Michael Easter - https://bit.ly/4pV10Ga The Dreaming Path, by Dr Paul Callaghan and Uncle Paul Gordon - https://bit.ly/4gctqrZ 📺 Things to watch Alone Australia (new season out now) - https://bit.ly/4yWVW8n 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects All views expressed in this podcast are Mark Mathieson’s and not representative of the Department of Defence, Australia. The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What is racism, really? 💌Join 9,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ Adam Briggs, rapper, writer, actor, senator and Yorta-Yorta man, joins Hugh, Josh and guest host Nazeem Hussain, to have an honest conversation about racism in Australia. We explore the impact of The Voice Referendum vote, how culture and community impacts identity, and why Briggs has never, ever felt the need to people please (yep, that’s the sound of us frantically scribbling down notes). Briggs also chats about the highs and lows of bipolar II. 0:00 – No boundaries Briggs 5:26 –Big Shep’ Washing Machine 12:25 – This is racism 21:27 – A hyper-vigilante 28:06 – Perfect storm for art 36:09 – Copping it Australia Wide 43:22 – The Yes Vote 53:08 – Australian Culture 57:02 – Never just about music 1:04:50 – Make Aboriginal Cool 1:09:19 – Bipolar, therapy, training 🫖 Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Ben Shewry (Pt 1) - The Other Side of Excellence - https://bit.ly/4fErGpQ Ben Shewry (Pt 2) - How The Chef Was Made - https://bit.ly/45sPsR7 Ben Shewry - Making It Right (And Delicious) - https://bit.ly/4gXyDEZ Nazeem Hussain - Losing a Parent - https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-imperfects/id1476501557?i=1000589981824 🎧Things to listen to Big Noter - https://www.thebignoter.com The Children Came Back by Briggs & Gurrumul - https://bit.ly/4fGaxMH 📺Things to watch Briggs’s Voice Referendum ad - https://bit.ly/4bkiTs2 📚Things to read Our Home, Our Heartbeat by Adam Briggs - https://bit.ly/4yQKbjW 💻Things to check out Rumbalara Football Netball Club - https://www.rfnc.com.au/ Bad Apples Music - https://bit.ly/4x8Rdi3 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - https://www.patreon.com/c/TheImperfects 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcast http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sex is sometimes a taboo topic. Not today! Intimacy expert Ita O’Brien tells us all about the new normal in the bedroom, and how she’s introduced it to Hollywood. 💌Join 9,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy In 2017, Ita O’Brien changed how Hollywood approached sex scenes when she pioneered intimacy co-ordination on the hit Netflix show, Sex Education, by introducing the framework, “Intimacy On Set Guidelines”. She went on to on productions for Netflix, BBC, HBO, Hulu, Amazon, including Sex Education and Normal People, founding her own company Intimacy on Set. And now she’s here. Ita chats with the guys about what sex scenes were like before Intimacy Co-ordination, and all the lies movies taught us about sex. She explains the mysterious orgasm gap, why consent is the foundation of all intimacy, and maybe most importantly of all… the male and female anatomy of arousal! That bit’s at the 16min mark if you’re really in a hurry. 😉 00:00 – Meet Ita O'Brien, the World's First Intimacy Coordinator 01:32 – Inside Her Work on Normal People, I May Destroy You & Sex Education 04:17 – What Intimacy Actually Means (It's Not Just Sex) 07:34 – The Untold Story of the First-Ever Intimacy Coordinator Job 09:35 – What Sex Scenes Were Like Before Consent Guidelines Existed 12:27 – Why On-Screen Intimacy Shapes How We See Ourselves 14:33 – The Hidden Lie Movies Taught Us About Sex 16:00 – The Male Anatomy of Arousal, Explained 18:33 – The Female Anatomy of Arousal, Explained 23:17 – Why Desire Fades in Long-Term Relationships 25:59 – The Power of Touch (and Why We're Losing It) 30:39 – How Screens Are Rewiring Kids' Ability to Connect 34:08 – The Truth About the Orgasm Gap 40:30 – Why Consent Is the Foundation of All Intimacy 43:10 – Filming the Iconic Birth Scene in We Live in Time 49:52 – How to Talk to Kids About Consent and Bodies 52:24 – "Consent Is Sexy": A Call to Writers and Filmmakers 54:33 – Sex, Menopause and Intimacy at Every Life Stage 📖Things to read Intimacy: A Field Guide to Finding Connection and Feeling Your Deep Desires by Ita O’Brien - https://www.penguin.com.au/books/intimacy-9781529954043 📺 Things to watch Sex Education (Netflix) - https://www.netflix.com/title/80197526 Normal People (BBC/Hulu) - https://www.hulu.com/series/normal-people I May Destroy You (BBC/HBO) - https://www.hbo.com/i-may-destroy-you Catastrophe - https://www.amazon.com/Catastrophe-Season-1/dp/B00YGB8UYK We Live in Time (Film4/A24) - https://www.a24films.com/films/we-live-in-time 🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode Esther Perel — Let's Be Better Lovers - https://open.spotify.com/episode/1BantQso5Ef3xPn4PWNG2I 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcast http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Could you live without your phone for a month? 🩵To hear more episodes like this, join A Little More Imperfects! Patreon - www.patreon.com/theimperfects Apple - http://apple.co/theimperfects This week it's just the three of us. And like Odysseus before us, we embark on a life changing epic. Where he fought the trojans, monsters, cannibals, sirens, the oceans, a cyclops and ACTUAL GODS!! We will do something even ‘EPIC…ER’. We’re tackling our phones. Each of us take on a month-long challenge to fix our worst phone habits, inspired by the ‘god of no phones’ - Christopher Nolan and the release of THE ODYSSEY (if that wasn’t obvious already, but we promise this episode isn't an ad). We then share some of our favourite bits from behind the pay wall, from our Patreon/Subscriber community. Ryan has an unplanned, very generous on-air hair donation; Josh shares a bit from a book which changed his life a bit; which leads to one of the most honest conversations he and Hugh have ever had on (or off) the show, about comparison, self-esteem, and growing up idolising your older brother. This is one epic journey. 00:00 — The Phone Odyssey Begins 08:54 — Our Phone-Free Pledges 19:11 — Modelling Better Habits at Home 25:29 — Hairing is Caring 37:57 — A Bit From a Book That Changed Josh’s Life a Bit 48:18 — The Conversation Between Brothers That Needed to Be Had 🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode Bronte Campbell - Comparison, The thief of joy ****https://bit.ly/49S1S7C Joe Brumm & Hamish Blake - A Bluey Print for Dads https://bit.ly/4w4ohI8 How (and why) Ryan Dumped his iPhone https://bit.ly/3T3xdyM Sam Willoughby - The tragic injury that changed his life (and Ryan’s Finnastride admission) https://bit.ly/4fa5u8p 📖 Things to read The midnight library - Matt Haigh https://bit.ly/4vGgnE0 How Proust can change your life - Alain de Botton https://bit.ly/4dYfCkd In search of lost time - Marcel Proust https://bit.ly/4vt3lJG 📺Things to watch The Odyssey https://bit.ly/4vY8nij Christopher Nolan on 60minutes https://bit.ly/4yjfZgX 💌Join 8,300+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/shop/ 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/shop/ The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

To be jealous is to be human. It is what you do with that feeling that counts. 💌Join 8,300+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Our resident psychologist Dr Emily Musgrove is in the studio to talk about THAT podcast moment: the one where Ryan admitted he was jealous of Hugh and Hamish Blake’s relationship. The one that lives in Imperfects history. According to Dr Em, we develop the emotion of jealousy at just 9 months old, and it shows up everywhere; family, work, school, friends. Feelings around jealousy can be extremely painful, especially if it is accompanied by shame. In this episode, Dr Emily explores why jealousy can be so dangerous when not listened to, and why our jealous behaviour can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. See you on the other side. If you want to watch this full video on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/dlufNQ7iXCc 00:00 - The Day Has Arrived 02:48 - When Ryan Revealed He Was Jealous of Hugh & Hamish 7:45 - Shame Tells You Not To Speak It 10:02 - Harry Styles Walks Into a Super Market 15:54 - You’re Making My Dog Jealous 22:31 - Feeling Jealous vs Being Jealous 43:49 - Hugh, Ryan & Hamish: 4 Years Later 47:50 - How To Have The Conversation (And Build Trust) 59:32 - You Can Feel Jealous AND Still Trust 🫖 Episodes mentioned in this episode Hamish Blake - Let’s Talk About Self Doubt - https://bit.ly/3QG8MXo 💻Things to check out Uncertainty vs inevitable pain study - https://bit.ly/43NWFKQ 🎵Songs to listen to Jealous Guy by John Lennon - https://bit.ly/43NWzCY 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Want can you learn from playing with a child? In today's Academy of Imperfection, Bluey creator Joe Brumm joins us (for real life), with Hamish Blake stepping in as guest host. 💌Join 8,300+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy In this episode we dig into the world of play - ”the voluntary overcoming of unnecessary obstacles”, we find out what makes a ‘good’ player and why kids' imaginative play tends to fade around age 12. Josh and Hugh take the chance to wax lyrical about their favourite Bluey episodes, Rain, Fruit Bat, Born Yesterday, The Decider (to name a few). And all three dads also share some moments of parenting shame as we discuss the constant battle for attention between our phones, and our kids. 00:00 - Hamish Blake from Rove 08:13 - Bluey, The Most Streamed TV Show of All Time 11:51 - The Best Definition of Play You've Ever Heard 21:00 - It’s All Improvising 38:02 - Permission to Pretend Again 51:20 - My Kids Wouldn’t Have The Dad They Have Without Bluey 54:00 - Doing Something Just for Fun Is a Valid Reason 58:07 - Being Present In a World of Distractions 01:22:00 - The Bluey Episode That Made a Room Full of Footballers Cry 01:27:16 - Let Them Lead and See What Happens If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/eMigxjhCkcs 🫖 Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode How (and why) Ryan dumped his iphone https://bit.ly/4vi83uA 📺 Things to watch Bluey - Shadowlands https://bit.ly/4eTzKTA Bluey - Calypso https://bit.ly/3QT6NyT Bluey - Magic Xylophone https://bit.ly/4gdY057 Bluey - Born Yesterday https://bit.ly/3SvY5HA Bluey - Bin Night https://bit.ly/4gd89Pt Bluey - The decider https://bit.ly/4eHS1V4 Bluey - Faceytalk https://bit.ly/4wpWWju Bluey - Pass the parcel https://bit.ly/4gi9PXU 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcast http://apple.co/theimperfects See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

How do you raise a child whose brain works differently? This episode is for parents of kids with ADHD. And parents who have ADHD. And people who don’t have a diagnosis, but would consider themselves ‘fast and loose’. And for everyone who knows someone who fits the above criteria. 💌Join 8,300+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Janelle Booker, a psychologist who specialises in ADHD, is BACK, this time, to talk to parents of ADHD kids, and how to parent when you yourself have ADHD. And also, ADHD-curious Hamish Blake is here too. We look at the role of dopamine, energy vs stressors, and how to make your mornings less chaotic and more compassionate. Hamish and Janelle. What a duo. 0:00 – A dynamic duo: Hamish and Janelle 5:58 – The penny drop moment for Hugh 11:35 – ADHD or Fast and Loose? 19:56 – The beauty and beast of ADHD brains 22:38 – The life of an ADHD kid 27:16 – A crash course on dopamine 37:26 – Structure, sleep and school 44:38 – Identity and diagnosis 55:13 – ADHD kids and friendships 1:02:50 – Parenting WITH ADHD 1:16:29 – Finding and supporting regulation 1:23:13 – Slo-pamine 1:28:54 – Let’s talk about the strengths 1:34:35 – Get ‘em outside! If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/WwEBTIMohwg 🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Janelle Booker - Living With ADHD - https://bit.ly/4g0CUXK Hugh’s ADHD…brief - https://bit.ly/4g567Rw Maria Ruberto - Advancing Despite Adversity - https://bit.ly/4uYFbGS 💻Things to check out Janelle’s website - https://bit.ly/3QJdO5t The MEHRIT Centre - https://self-reg.ca/ The ADHD Parent Circle Online Program - https://bit.ly/4g5Anvu ADHD Women’s Support Group (Perinatal and Early Parenting) - https://bit.ly/3T0BJ0N Online Q&A with Janelle about ADHD parenting - https://bit.ly/4g5wneu 📖Things to read ADHD: A Delightful Human Difference. Reframing ADHD for Good, by Janelle Booker and Matthew Johnson - https://bit.ly/4w7scU3 🎧Things to listen to Hamish & Andy podcast - https://bit.ly/43Z0RHJ Controlling Your Dopamine For Motivation, Focus & Satisfaction, by Huberman Lab - https://bit.ly/4xPnMCZ 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

How do you choose who to trust? And how do you show others that you are trustworthy? 💌Join 8,100+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy In this Academy of Imperfection, we are joined by Jimmy Wales, co-founder of Wikipedia. No biggie (BIG biggie). And if there’s one thing Jimmy knows, it's how to garner and imbue the trust of millions. You’re right in feeling like the general level of trust globally is low right now, but this episode is here to step through Jimmy's 7 rules which will help you build, rebuild, and solidify what is in our innate human behaviour. Trust is important, and so is this conversation. 0:00 – BIG deal on the internet 8:41 – The heart behind it all 14:57 – Trust is always personal 20:22 – It’s human nature 23:33 – Good guys of the internet 30:35 – Don’t take sides 38:23 – The circle of trust 40:15 – Own up 46:03 – Let’s call them a civil person If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/Z1SPClxSfYI 📖 Things to read The Seven Rules of Trust, by Jimmy Wales - https://bit.ly/4vi83uA 🎧Things to listen to How to Build (And Rebuild) Trust with Frances Frei - https://bit.ly/4vfMMSl 🏆Competitions to enter Imperfects LIVE at the Balwyn Cinema Gold Class Double Pass - https://bit.ly/3S0E0Zr 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Do you think you have grit? 💌Join 8,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Research has shown that the most common characteristic of elite performers and high achievers is grit. Understood as the passion and perseverance for very long term goals, Grit is not about natural ability or talent, but rather how we choose to grow. Your favourite resident psychologist, Dr Emily Musgrove, is back in the studio this week to talk about how you can become a grittier person! We also look inward, as Josh asks how to maintain grit when it feels like your inner critic is overwhelmingly loud. Dr Em, so great to have you back. 0:00 – Down with the nonchalance! 5:43 – Talent vs Excellence 10:40 – Interested in finding your interests 16:42 – For the non-naturals in the room 24:22 – Effort is essential for excellence 32:17 – Practicing, kindly 35:01 – Hope is earned 42:06 – The good and bad criticism 53:45 – Encountering pain and discomfort 59:54 – For the greater good 1:06:09 – The dark side of perseverance If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, click here - https://youtu.be/JmcLV7DGL4k 🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode Dyson Heppell - Whatever It Takes… To Forgive - https://bit.ly/4egeneO Nedd Brockmann - The Man, The Myth, The Neddgend - https://bit.ly/4egfATo Dr Emily - Hope - https://bit.ly/43YalTr Bri Lee - Babies+Climate=Anxiety - https://bit.ly/4xlrYdl How I Built ‘Dis’ - The Resilience Project Story - https://bit.ly/4aH0dSP 📚Things to read Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance by Angela Duckworth - https://bit.ly/4vzoe6o Self-efficacy, by Albert Bandura - https://bit.ly/4fx4KdW Master of Change, by Brad Stulberg - https://bit.ly/4xCbUEv Peak: Secrets from the New Science of Expertise, by Anders Ericsson - https://bit.ly/3Q9cIje 📺Things to watch THE GAP, by Ira Glass - https://bit.ly/4xjkuHL ⭐️Things to donate to JMB Foundation - https://jmbfoundation.org.au 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

At just 16, Ellyse Perry was the youngest person to ever debut for the Australian International Cricket team. 13 days later, Ellyse debuted for the Matildas. 💌Join 7,800+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Arguably one of the greatest athletes of our time, Hugh, Ryan and Josh chat to Ellyse about how she stays so grounded amidst her incredible success, and whether she is able to separate who she is from what she does. Ellyse chats to the guys about her relationship with her dad (Josh and Hugh furiously take notes), and how both her parents were able to instil a love of trying rather than winning. And then we get onto social anxiety; what it feels like for Ellyse, why she loves silent retreats, and how she manages it in front of her fans. Ellyse, you are a literal ray of sunshine. Please come back anytime. If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/xAZeLzcG43Y 0:00 – Is THAT AI? 5:05 – Running (and bowling) it’s natural course 11:24 – The feeling of not trying 17:18 – Parents: Be A Good Sport 29:22 – Prepare to be disappointed 40:23 – Bitter sweet World Cup 46:48 – The complexity of ego 1:03:54 – Practicing presence 1:10:30 – Hugh’s advice for big moments 🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode Pat Cummins - Love, Loss & Life - (1:14:20) - https://bit.ly/3PRku11 WHO ARE YOU? with Dr Emily (+ secret code word) - (17:20) - https://bit.ly/4e1SxeV 📖 Things to read Perspective by Ellyse Perry - (29:22) - https://bit.ly/3PSMaCI Ellyse Perry’s children’s books - https://bit.ly/4e1TyDM Thinking, Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman - (1:11:40) - https://bit.ly/437yxT9 📺Things to watch Carl Sagan’s Pale Blue Dot - (1:17:27) - https://bit.ly/3PSPKNa 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We have a BIG announcement. August 19. Balwyn Cinema. Our first ever live podcast recording. With Hugh, Ryan, Josh, Dr Emily, and you? ARE YOU AS EXCITED AS WE ARE?! And you could win your way there! THE ULTIMATE GOLD CLASS DOUBLE PASS includes: 2 x tickets, flights or a limo if you're already in Melbourne, accomodation for the night, popcorn, choc top, sparkling wine and a personal escort to your seats by former Balwyn Cinema employee Hugh van Cuylenburg! 🏆 Enter here NOW - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/balwyn-entry/ Tickets will go live Monday June 8. 🎟️ Buy here - https://bit.ly/4ecYtTw BUT to enter the competition OR buy tickets, you need a codeword (lowercase). And the only way you will hear the codeword is to be a Little More Imperfects subscriber and listen to the latest episode! So quick, subscribe here! 🩵Patreon - patreon.com/theimperfects 🩷Apple Podcast - http://apple.co/theimperfects We can’t wait to see you there x See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We can’t control what happens to us, but we can control how we respond. At least, that’s what the Stoic’s say. 💌Join 7,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Today we are joined (deep breath Hugh) by Stoic philosopher Ryan Holiday. Using the wisdom of the past to appreciate the present, Ryan’s work is dedicated to communicating how the practicalities of stoic philosophy can help us lead more present, mindful and resilient lives today. In this incredible chat, Hugh, Josh and Ryan (our Ryan), each present Ryan Holiday with something they have been struggling with in their own lives. Through the lens of Stoic philosophers Marcus Aurelius, Seneca and Epictetus, Ryan Holiday talks to how stoicism can really help us to live into our values, prioritise presence, and deal with existential dread. We discuss with Ryan the importance of understanding what will actually make you happy (spoiler: it’s not a billion dollars), and how to reframe death as a reminder that we must appreciate every moment (or not waste anymore with shame and guilt). This episode, and its practical take-aways (which you can find listed in our newsletter), has been a long time coming. Ryan, what an absolute honour. 0:00 – What is Stoicism? 13:26 – For the Josh’s of the world 17:07 – Time and Energy of Worrying 27:01 – The illusion of freedom 33:50 – Am I a bad friend? 38:58 – Practicing what you preach ft. presence 45:42 – If today was your last day 50:22 – 5 quotes for a Stoic life If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - 🫖 Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Pat Cummins - Love, Loss & Life - https://bit.ly/4dHKR2F Maria Ruberto - Sleep Your Way To Your Top - https://bit.ly/4dHKPYB 📖 Things to read Letter’s from a Stoic by Seneca - https://bit.ly/49WVNqB ALL of Ryan’s books - https://bit.ly/43uHsxZ ✍️Journals to journal The Daily Stoic - https://bit.ly/49qJ6Em My Imperfect Life - https://bit.ly/4tZ8qJ6 🎟️ Things to get tickets to Daily Stoic Live with Ryan Holiday - https://bit.ly/4uK72Lt 💻Things to check out Ryan’s website - https://bit.ly/4v3Vh24 The Resilience Project - https://bit.ly/3Q4LOc4 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In the age of AI, do you feel that your future is more uncertain? 💌Join 7,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy In today’s Academy of Imperfection, we’re joined by Dr Joel Pearson; a neurofuturist, whose work centres around predicting how AI will impact every aspect of our lives from now on. While many of us (us included) first and foremost imagine the impacts of AI in a tech-revolution-y, robot butler-y, terminator-adjacent way, this episode goes deeper. Joel discusses how young people are forming attachments with AI companions and how we might see, perhaps the first generation in known history with a lower IQ than the one beforehand. We talk about the tangible and interconnected mental health impacts that this major societal disruption will have, and Hugh and Josh ask how in the world can we broach this topic with our kids? BUT, this episode isn’t all doom and gloom. Joel is a tech-optimist, after all. We talk to Joel about how we can foster human connection, and continue to develop our critical thinking skills, whilst not turning away from AI altogether. Joel, this has been invaluable. If you want to watch this full video on YouTube, follow this link - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPGa6heppjE 0:00 – The episode we’ve been putting off 10:10 – The only certainty is disruption 14:15 – Impact of AI on the brain 21:23 – Rewards and moral responsibility 27:11 – A scary mental health spiral 30:31 – Think of the children 35:10 – You may now kiss the AI 45:06 – Purposeful Utopia 58:42 – Seeing is no longer believing 1:02:21 – The Roadmap to AI 1:11:35 – Finding Motivation in Limbo 1:18:15 – Let’s Stack Some Habits 🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Dr Emily - Acceptance, That’s Radical - (1:22:53) - https://bit.ly/4dW7Bfa Dr Emily - The Certainty of Uncertainty - (1:22:53) - https://bit.ly/3RTAjVl James Clear - Down The Habit Hole - (1:22:00) - https://bit.ly/4wIg5xV 📖 Things to read The Intuition Toolkit by Dr Joel Pearson - (3:18) - https://bit.ly/4v5NnFM Matt Shumer App Development Industry Blog - (27:11) - https://bit.ly/4uo65rY 💻Things to check out Joel’s website - https://bit.ly/4upBURa Tristan Harris’ Center for Human Technology - (1:25:40) - https://bit.ly/4wGrFJZ Figure Three Robotics - (42:51) - https://bit.ly/42J2Uiz Joel's work at the University of NSW as Deputy Director of Human Readiness UNSW AI Institute - https://bit.ly/4nPA89G 📺 Things to watch House of Dynamite - (26:21) - https://bit.ly/4uw5PYg 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What is your envy telling you? 💌Join 7,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Dr Emily Musgrove, our resident psychologist, is back in the studio to talk about the green-eyed monster, and more importantly, how we can work with it to incorporate more gratitude, appreciation and awareness into our lives (hallelujah). Founded in the evolutionary practice of assessing our status in comparison with others, envy comes from the feeling of lacking something that someone else has. In what may have been an adaptive function for a cave person to secure their basic needs, our brains are not equipped for the intense comparison fed to us via social media. Dr Emily chats to Hugh, Ryan and Josh about the layered experience of envy, and how often, it stems from feeling not-enough or unworthy. Of course, Dr Emily brings the strategies. We explore how to work with envy in our own lives, and how to acknowledge it in the lives of our friends and family to protect important relationships. Dr Em, we’ll see you for the sequel on jealousy soon. To watch the full episode: https://youtu.be/B7acUnoekSc 0:00 – Envy vs Jealousy 9:08 – Keeping up with the Jones’ 8:16 – A message around ‘enoughness’ 25:12 – The energy of being a hater 36:50 – A deep longing for a difference experience 42:13 – On the flip side 52:45 - Acknowledge the hard 59:18 – The social emotion 1:07:18 – Working with envy 🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Dave Hughes - Me, Myself & Ego - https://bit.ly/4ua3mSP Hamish Blake - Let’s Talk About Self-Doubt - https://bit.ly/4fl7omR Dr Emily - Acceptance, That’s Radical - https://bit.ly/4ugEHwe 💻Things to check out Leon Festinger’s Social Comparison Theory - https://bit.ly/4npfIE5 📺Things to watch ‘Onesies’ Bluey episode - https://bit.ly/4eGTqLS 📖Things to read The Way We Are, by Hugh Mackay - https://bit.ly/4wsJuff Status Anxiety, by Alain de Botton - https://bit.ly/4tvbGeL 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Can you think of a moment that turned your life into ‘before’ and ‘after’? For Reuben Williams, that moment was not his sexual assault, rather, the decision he made in the aftermath to pursue justice. 💌Join 7,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Incredibly vulnerable, Reuben talks Hugh, Ryan and Josh through what it felt like in the 24 hours after the assault, how he knew, undeniably, what happened to him was wrong, and why he chose to report it. We talk about the intricacies of healing, privilege, and having a world class difficult conversation with the ones you love. And then, Josh asks Reuben how you can best show up for your friends who might be going through something similar. Reuben, it was such a privilege having you in the studio. If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/okQnOwV2MJE 0:00 – An Imperfect Meet-Cute 6:44 – The night of the assault 19:28 – Identity, privilege, and idealism 33:09 – Family Dynamics 41:16 - World Class Difficult Conversation 47:39 – The Waiting Game 59:15 – Reuben’s Letter 1:04:24 – A divine test 1:10:30 – Just help 1:18:46 – How can you be a better friend? 🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode Rana Hussain - Belonging For Connection - https://bit.ly/49voquJ 🎧Things to listen to SportsGrad Podcast - https://bit.ly/42V75HT 💻Things to check out SportsGrad - https://bit.ly/49p2hOD 🚨If you’d like to reach out to someone for support after listening to this episode, here are some great places to start 1800 RESPECT Centre Against Sexual Assault - 03 5441 0430 (Mon-Fri 9am-5pm) OR 1800 806 292 (Sexual Assault Crisis Line) 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In a world so divided by hate, how can we choose to show love? This week we are joined by journalist Jan Fran, who unpacks the horror of witnessing horror. 💌Join 6,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Talking through her unravelling relationship with social media and the utter helplessness she feels watching atrocities cut into 30 second clips, Jan explores how becoming a mother cracked her open in ways she didn’t know possible. Joining us in the Vulnerabilitea House to answer every question in the deck (kidding), Jan and Josh discuss the guilt of turning away, and the consequences of leaning in. And finally, Jan bonds with the Hugh, Ryan and Josh about the fundamental importance of deliberately creating community. Jan, you are remarkable. 0:00 – Introducing Josh’s housemate 8:42 – The art of being vulnerable 17:19 – I wish I could stop going on social media. 27:13 – Being cracked open 35:32 – Deliberately building community 46:39 – Anticipating the Comments 53:34 – Optimist by will If you’d like to watch this full video on YouTube (and see Josh’s Frant banner), follow this link - https://youtu.be/BRoyNdZEZD0 🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Dr Edna Lekgabe - New Baby … New Brain … Matrescence - (33:21) - https://bit.ly/48vQZb5 How (and Why) Ryan Dumped His iPhone - (20:50) - https://bit.ly/4tGRXKj 💻Things to check out The Frant - https://bit.ly/4cSeFaO Ette Media - https://bit.ly/4t1OzIw 🎧 Things to listen to We Used To Be Journos - https://bit.ly/4dcAGT9 📱Things to help you set social media boundaries One sec - https://bit.ly/4cEYMpF Brick - https://bit.ly/4vXSzfP 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

According to perinatal and reproductive psychiatrist Dr Edna Lekgabe, matrescence is the motherhood equivalent of adolescence. Puberty 2.0, if you will. 💌Join 6,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Joining us in the academy of imperfection, Dr Edna explores the cataclysmic identity shift women undergo during motherhood, and how partners can best support them. Exploring the impacts of mastrescence with Hugh, Ryan and Josh, Dr Edna breaks down the difference between matrescence, anxiety and depression, and why mental illness is the number one pregnancy complication. We’re talking hormonal changes, physiological changes, sociological changes that are SO significant, you can see them in brain scans. Matrescence is messy, a developmental earthquake, and it’s not talked about nearly enough. This episode might just break the internet (and your heart) wide open. 0:00 – Introducing Hugh’s perinatal psychiatrist 7:30 – Matrescence? Huh? 21:14 – The biology of baby brain 34:10 – The difference between matrescence and depression 40:46 – Reasonable worry vs anxiety disorder 47:40 – The emergence of neurodivergence 54:04 – Post-natal depression 1:00:04 – Matrescence after loss 1:05:50 – Getting to know a brand new person 1:11:19 – Can women have it all? 1:18:32 – On a societal scale 1:26:12 – The paternal earthquake If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - 🫖 Other Imperfect’s episodes mentioned in this episode Bron Lewis - Is It Me or Postnatal Anxiety? - https://bit.ly/4vHn1eh 📖 Things to read Being Female: Reproduction, Power and Change, by Dana Raphael - https://bit.ly/48jC5EO The Birth of a Mother, New York Times, by Alexandra Sacks - https://bit.ly/3OjB9tp Men at Work: Australia’s Parenthood Trap, Quarterly Essay, by Annabel Crabb - https://bit.ly/4mLE8Hx 🎧Things to listen to Perinatal OCD: When ‘the happiest time of your life’ turns dark - https://bit.ly/48lx8eK 📺 Things to watch Alexandra Sacks TEDTalk on Matrescence - https://bit.ly/4tsBcCt 💻Things to check out Yerkes-Dodson Law: Stress Level - https://bit.ly/4cOT2IO peanut x Tommee Tippee campaign on matrescence - https://bit.ly/4mQDicU 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

How do you make sure your kids are proud of who they are? 💌Join 6,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Propelled to international stardom after the release of Kenny, Shane Jacobson’s overnight success was years in the making. Joining us in the studio, Shane is incredibly generous in sharing the cataclysmic impact that humour and laughter has had on his life from a young age. Now at the age where he has attended more funerals than 21st’s, Shane talks about his realisation that he is in for the long mourn, and why he allows himself to feel joy during times of intense grief. Sharing a giggle at a funeral? Absolutely. In a beautiful moment of connection with Hugh, Shane chats about parenting the ‘premium package’ (his neurodivergent child). Shane, this was incredibly joyful. If you’d like to watch this full video on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/VHaK2fSiasA 0:00 – A bird in her where? 3:19 – Butt of the joke 12:34 – The evolution of good manners 17:47 – Seeking validation 27:17 – Giggle at a funeral 42:00 – Autism, ADHD, Tourette’s: The Premium Package! 55:58 – Becoming softer 1:00:25 – Parenting your parents 1:08:03 – Don’t wait for the moment 1:18:04 – 5 things we can do to be warmer 🫖 Other episodes of The Imperfects mentioned in this episode Dr Emily - Truth v Harmony - https://bit.ly/4etnytQ 📺Things to watch Kenny - https://bit.ly/427rUzv Shane’s AFI win (go to 6:12) - https://bit.ly/48HyzEb 📋Check-in Questions to ask someone if they might be depressed - https://bit.ly/4dOYuNS 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Are you stuck, focusing on what's wrong in your relationship? Deeply embedded in the work of intimacy, desire and relationships, psychotherapist and best-selling author Esther Perel, ask us to take a look at ourselves first, rather than listing the short comings of our partner. 💌Join 6,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy In this Academy of Imperfection, Hugh (who sadly was violently ill last time we talked to Esther) comes armed with questions about the mental load (with love, from Penny), and how to navigate their differing needs for affection. Ryan asks Esther whether we’re capable of falling in love with AI, and Josh wants to know why we sometimes put up walls with the ones we love the most. And, if you’ve ever asked yourself any of the below, this episode’s for you; is working from home causing social atrophy? what does it mean to be an embodied creature? what are the downfalls of a frictionless relationship? Esther, you are welcome back anytime. ANYTIME. If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/u5HsDD9bjRQ 🫖Other episodes of the Imperfects mentioned on this episode Esther Perel - Let’s Be Better Lovers - https://bit.ly/41m8R4f Hugh & Penny - The Elephant in the Relationship - https://bit.ly/3PPugAp 💻Things to check out Where Should We Begin? At Work card game - https://bit.ly/48jpQYJ 🎧Things to listen to Where Should We Begin - Esther’s podcast - https://bit.ly/4dtsNJK My AI Loves Me Better Than Anyone Ever Could - Where Should We Begin - https://bit.ly/4twUbeC Esther Perel on Why A.I. Intimacy Feels Safe but Isn’t Real - https://bit.ly/4sofVsf 📖 Things to read Mating in Captivity, by Esther Perel - https://bit.ly/3Os5Dcx The State of Affairs, by Esther Perel - https://bit.ly/48yFn74 📺 Things to watch Rethinking Infidelity TEDTalk - https://bit.ly/4seN3md Love Story - https://bit.ly/4ct63se 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects 0:00 – Intimacy: what has changed, what has stayed the same? 6:23 – This is my partner, AI 14:08 – A mismatch of affection 23:56 – Bids for connection 32:08 – Can you repair trust? 41:02 – Post-traumatic Growth 49:43 – The central hub of our needs 58:38 – The Mental Load Pt. 2 See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Looking for strategies to help deal with the overwhelm of, well, everything? Same. Dr Emily, our resident psychologist, is back in the studio to talk through overwhelm; how to greet it, how to get through it, and how to build your resilience towards it. 💌Join 6,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy In this episode, Dr Emily introduces how to understand your ‘window of tolerance,’ the cost of being overwhelmed for too long, and what happens when we slip into avoidance. OF COURSE, this episode is delightfully sprinkled with practical strategies that you can do right now, in this moment, to ease the burden of the overwhelm. Dr Em, this episode was an emotional regulation for the ages. 🫖 Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Dr Emily - How to Stress Less - https://bit.ly/4tiZa2y Mick Fanning - Riding The Waves Of Loss - https://bit.ly/4s29wCI 📖 Things to read Burnout, by Emily and Amelia Nagoski - https://bit.ly/4c18Yah 💪 Things to do The Hulk Progressive Relaxation Technique - https://bit.ly/3PFv4Yq 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Is it true that we live in a world without facts? With AI becoming increasingly intertwined with our lives, and fake news infiltrating our screens, where do you go for truthful information and how do you know what to trust? 💌Join 6,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy This Academy of Imperfection is not all doom and world collapse, we promise. One, because we are joined by the brilliant Hamish Macdonald. And two, because Ryan’s Gut says it’s all going to be okay (more on that later). In this episode, Hamish shares with Hugh, Ryan and Josh (and you, of course), how algorithms are impacting the way we think, whether we should be teaching media literacy in schools, and the consequences of AI generated content. Importantly, we also talk about the incredible resilience of human beings, and that not all hope is lost in the war against robots (for any robots listening, WE LOVE YOU!) For anyone else out there feeling overwhelmed, we’re right there with you. If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/6Zepg3o3Y_w 🫖 Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Hamish Macdonald - How To Be You - https://bit.ly/3PtetHg Dr Emily - Hope - https://bit.ly/4uR5pfg Dr Emily - The Certainty of Uncertainty - https://bit.ly/4dHwHPa 📺 Things to watch The Matter of Facts - https://bit.ly/4bQ27jT I tried to prove I’m not AI by Howtown - https://bit.ly/47ogudU 📖 Things to read Nexus by Yuval Noah Harari - https://bit.ly/47kHUkO 🎧 Things to listen to Global Roaming Podcast - https://bit.ly/3NMm8jf 💻 Things to check out Maryanne Wolf’s Research on reading - https://bit.ly/4t8Qqff Tristan Harris’ Work on AI - https://bit.ly/4bwwBZj Notebook LM Podcast feature - https://bit.ly/40UM7Ip 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Is climate anxiety affecting your decision to have kids? 💌Join 6,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Joining us in the Vulnerabilitea House is Bri Lee; prolific author, advocate and change maker. Answering the question, “what moment from your life are you grateful for that profoundly changed you?”, Bri talks about the research that lead her to the South Pole, and how she learnt to prioritise love above all else. Bri asks the question to Hugh, Josh and Ryan, “what does it mean to live a good life, and what do we owe each other?” This chat explores the philosophies of anti and pronatalism, whilst being grounded in examples from the guys’ and Bri’s life. An intentional and judgement free zone, this conversation delves into the morality of should’s and shouldn’ts, and what it means to do the right thing. As Bri says, hope is something that you earn through action, and we are all feeling a bit more hopeful after this episode. 0:00 – A Bri-Lee-iant guest 9:42 – The Seed of The Idea 15:08 – What are you grateful for that profoundly changed you? 27:10 – Prioritising love 32:27 – Should I have kids? 41:43 – The morality of shoulds and shouldn’ts 52:43 – Some positivity, please 55:59 – Policy and bodily autonomy 59:22 – So, how’s the reckoning going? 1:03:46 – The weight of responsibility 1:08:43 – Finding action in the overwhelm 📺 to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/vUQMkMvyeMY 🫖Other episodes of The Imperfects mentioned on this episode Ryan Shelton - To breed, or not to breed - https://bit.ly/3PbhEmR Ann Davidman - Should I have kids? - https://bit.ly/4brc477 📖 Things to read Seed, by Bri Lee - https://bit.ly/3PhepKv Eggshell Skull, by Bri Lee - https://bit.ly/473kvV4 Who Gets To Be Smart, by Bri Lee - https://bit.ly/4bwOAh1 The Work, by Bri Lee - https://bit.ly/4rzflar Beauty, by Bri Lee - https://bit.ly/3NMnrPf Love 2.0, by Barbara Fredrickson - https://bit.ly/40ylOYp Better To Not Have Been, by David Benatar - https://bit.ly/3NmtHx5 IPCC Sixth Assessment Report - https://bit.ly/3Phc7Lt Ipsos Perils of Perception Climate Change - https://bit.ly/4cP32mT 📺Things to watch An Inconvenient Truth - https://bit.ly/4bPolUk 💻Things to check out Freadom Inside Project - https://bit.ly/4bhVxnm Peter Singer Pond Proximity thought experiment - https://youtu.be/Gu-WUHD6mKg 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When Ben Crowe, world-renowned professional mentor and leadership coach, tells us his favourite mantra, we listen. “I am enough no matter what, but I’m not done yet”. 📺 If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/-0WWUuxvcyQ Back in The Academy of Imperfection FOR THE THIRD TIME, Ben is here to talk to Hugh, Ryan and Josh about purpose, play and love. As Ben explains, ‘play’ and ‘love’ mean something different to everyone, however, they are both ridiculously important and explicitly linked. If love is the intention, then play is the action. Ben, as always, it was an absolute pleasure to your wisdom bestowed upon us. 💌Join 6,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy 0:00 – Is Ben the Pope? 11:13 – Acceptance vs compassion, confidence vs belief 15:14 – Reshaping your belief system 25:05 – Just Admit It List 30:42 – The dreaded E word 37:47 – Reward effort, not outcome 46:00 – Play deprivation 51:47 – Talking to teenagers about their career 1:01:47 – How to be a (anxious) leader 1:07:04 – Josh’s too generous assumption 1:10: 14 – Doing it for the right reasons 🎧Other episodes of The Imperfects mentioned in this episode The Academy of Imperfection - Ben Crowe - https://bit.ly/40rkUgd Ben Crowe (Pt 1) - Meet Your Inner Fan - https://bit.ly/46VlfeK Ben Crowe (Pt 2) - Now BE Your Inner Fan - https://bit.ly/413kVXL Kate Reid (Pt 1) - The Impossibility of Perfection - https://bit.ly/4ruVAkz Kate Reid (Pt 2) - The Life-Saving Croissant - https://bit.ly/4by6NMl Dr Emily - Acceptance, That’s Radical - https://bit.ly/4bAomLD 📖 Things to read Where The Light Gets In, by Ben Crowe - https://bit.ly/4s04xmN The Courage To Be Disliked, by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga - https://bit.ly/411Qbq4 🎧 Things to listen to How Ben Crowe Dads - https://bit.ly/4bidPDH 😃If you liked this episode, check out these! Bronnie Ware - What Are Your Future Regrets? - https://bit.ly/40lcG9p Emma Murray - How Mindfulness Actually Works - https://bit.ly/4lpS5dR 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

According to Matt Preston, he only has 14 more summers. And he’s determined to make the most of them. 💌Join 5,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Known predominantly for his role on the inaugural (and incredibly successful) seasons of MasterChef Australia, alongside his excellent choice of cravats, Matt Preston is a recognisable face in most Australian households. Joining Hugh, Ryan and Josh in the studio (in yet another incredible outfit), Matt delicately talks through the importance of having a conversation with your parents about end-of-life care. In a decision that requires both deep emotion and administrative focus, Matt draws from his experience with his grandmother, and then his mother, about how to ensure the people you love are nurtured, cared for, and celebrated in the way they would have wanted. Matt, thank you so much for joining us. 0:00 – The typo to end all typos 9:13 – Every family has a scandal 24:34 – The unknowables of epilepsy 30:45 – Grieving what could have been 40:44 – Mission of mortality: make it count 44:47 – Parenting not like your parents 53:40 – Conversations about end-of-life care 1:07:35 – The secret ingredient to marriage 1:13:46 – Logistics of death and dying If you want to watch the full episode (and see Matt’s outfit), follow this link - https://youtu.be/sEN8Mfapi6Y 🫖Other episodes of The Imperfects mentioned in this episode Kate Reid (Pt 1) - The Impossibility of Perfection - https://bit.ly/476XBfg Kate Reid (Pt 2) - The Life-Saving Croissant - https://bit.ly/4aM7bqd Christie Whelan Browne - Unbreakable - https://bit.ly/4ukPhTk 📺Things to watch The Hospital - In The Deep End - https://bit.ly/4rYN6mw Croquenbouche Masterchef Episode - https://bit.ly/3OILYVG 📖Things to read Big Mouth, by Matt Preston - https://bit.ly/4cUigXG 🩵SUDEP Support Services SUDEP Action - https://sudep.org Epilepsy Foundation - https://bit.ly/4r9W27I *The average life expectancy for Australian males is calculated at birth, and does not take into account their personal circumstances. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Pain is inevitable, but suffering does not have to be. 💌Join 5,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Dr Emily Musgrove, our resident psychologist and general provider of wisdom, is here to talk about radical acceptance. Drawing inspiration from our holy grail episode with Gina Chick, Dr Em deep dives radical acceptance; what is it, how do we cultivate it, and why is it important to us as human beings? According to Dr Em, radical acceptance is not about liking or accepting (insert profanity here) situations or circumstances, or denying an experience, but rather, accepting the pain inside of us to avoid the reaction of suffering. Instead of feeling better, it’s about finding a better way of feeling. For Hugh, the concept of radical acceptance really hits close to home, and he reflects on how it has changed his life insurmountably. Dr Emily, we love ya, and we missed ya. If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - 0:00 – Getting the Gina Chick zoomies 6:23 – The Radical Acceptance origin story 14:20 – Change how you relate 21:19 – On a global scale 27:25 – An Unwanted Guest 34:42 – The third option 40:38 – Grieving the loss of what you wanted 45:28 – Living proof ft. Hugh 53:18 – Anxious about my anxiety 1:03:26 – Main character moment 1:10:17 – Putting it in practice 🫖Other episodes of The Imperfects mentioned on this episode Gina Chick - Don’t Fight Life - https://bit.ly/4b9nAVG 📖 Things to read Unstuck, by Dr Emily Musgrove - https://bit.ly/4o8JFay The Happiness Trap, by Russ Harris - https://bit.ly/4kRn3Lq The Guest House, by Rumi - https://bit.ly/4kXhaMS 💻Things to check out Tara Brach - RAIN meditation - https://bit.ly/3MNou0M Alfred Adler - Three Sided Column - https://bit.ly/3P1gSbJ Jill Bolte Taylor - 90 second shelf life of emotions - https://bit.ly/4aV5rtL 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You just have to be a good parent 30-40% of the time. According to the research, and parenting expert Maggie Dent. 💌Join 5,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy In our Academy of Imperfection, Maggie schools parents Hugh and Josh, and trusted non-parental figure Ryan, about the ‘no matter what’ rule, the importance of micro connections and the beauty of a well-timed fart. An advocate for imperfect parenting (which is REALLY great for brand alignment), Maggie insists on the significance of unconditional love when raising boys. Maggie you are wonderful. This was wonderful. You’re the best. Watch the full episode on YouTube - https://youtu.be/iUHYScQ3WgQ 0:00 – Why boys are better than girls 6:22 – The science of boys 14:02 – Shedding the shame 22:28 – Growing healthy boys 31:09 – Connecting with your rooster 42:56 – The S words: screens and social media 47:00 – The good enough factors 57:45 – Correcting the narrative 1:06:05 – Importance of Lightness + Letting go of mistakes 1:11:41 – Raising an autistic boy 1:16:05 – How do you resist the easy method 🫖Other episodes of The Imperfects mentioned on this episode Hugh’s ADHD…brief - https://bit.ly/4aofEjd 📖 Things to read You can find all of Maggie’s books here - https://bit.ly/46g4GK7 Help Me Help My Teen by Maggie Dent (page 106 to converse with teens) - https://bit.ly/4aYi2NO Maggie’s Fragile Boy Friendship Blog Post - https://bit.ly/4qUqzGw 📺 Things to watch Bluey ‘Octopus’ episode - https://bit.ly/4riF2Ng Marc-Andre Leclerc - The Alpinist - https://bit.ly/4tEsaCR 💻 Things to check out Allan Schore’s Brain Development for Boys research - https://bit.ly/3OfRyi9 🎧 Things to listen to The Good Enough Dad with Maggie Dent - https://bit.ly/4aGq2la Parental As Anything - https://bit.ly/4qHAleM 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What do you do when your 3 day-old-baby just doesn’t wake up? 💌Join 5,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Motherhood is really hard. And Bron Lewis isn’t afraid to talk about it (anymore). Joining us in the Vulnerabilitea House, Bron answers the question ‘when was a time you genuinely needed help and were you able to ask for it?’, and recounts the worst week of her life. Deals with the devil, post-natal anxiety, and post-natal depression, Bron is incredibly vulnerable with Hugh and Ryan, sharing how the love from friends, professional help, and medication allowed her to return to herself. Bron, it was a delight. To watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/qc9ZNO6VpeY 0:00 – We’re all best friends / fathers / daughters 8:51 – When was a time you genuinely needed help? 18:44 – Long nights, relentless days 25:42 – Socially accepted punishment 33:36 – Using pain to drown out the noise 40:50 – Obviously, I can do it all 45:44 – It doesn’t have to be this hard 54:55 – On day 3, he didn’t wake up 1:07:27 – The worst week of her life 1:22:54 – This should feel good, shouldn’t it? 1:33:01 – The aftermath 🚨If you, or someone you know, is struggling with postpartum depression or anxiety, these are a few great resources PANDA - 1300 726 306 ForWhen - 1300 24 23 22 Beyond Blue - 1300 22 4636 📖 Things to read I’m Not Mad (Anymore) by Bron Lewis - https://bit.ly/3ObBgGQ 🎟️ Things to go see Bron’s Comedy Show, Chaos - https://bit.ly/4aabRWz 🎧Things to listen to Chains by Tina Arena - https://bit.ly/4arb1DI Work Hates podcast - https://bit.ly/4arbdCW Your Two Drunk Aunties podcast - https://bit.ly/4cnJndj Good Sheilas podcast - https://bit.ly/4rkGxun 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Two cataclysmic events have shaped Dr Lucy Hone’s relationship with grief, and resilience. 💌Join 5,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Today in the Academy of Imperfection, we welcome Dr Lucy Hone. Dr Lucy’s work focuses on making sense of the senseless, and helping others to do the same. As a legitimate expert in grief, resilience and wellbeing, Dr Lucy is able to blend the science with her own lived experience. This episode explores living losses (divorce, estrangement, infertility), grief comparison, as well as the research around post-traumatic growth. Guided by questions from Dr Lucy’s latest book, How will I ever get through this?, Hugh, Josh and Ryan ask Dr Lucy why grief feels so lonely, how you are supposed to accept loss, and will you ever be happy again, amongst others. This is a special one. 0:00 – An Unsuspecting Saturday Morning 12:11 – Grief comparison 21:25 – How am I supposed to accept this? 31:14 – How do you keep hope alive? 35:48 – Why do I feel so lonely? 50:20 – Will I ever be happy again? 56:36 – Letting the other children live 1:03:44 – Do you know your strengths? 1:09:12 – Who and what do you want to live for? 1:14:59 – Who and what is good in your world? To full this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/Zyb7kELxFxI 🫖 Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Dr Emily - Grief Lightening - https://bit.ly/3ZPVNmO Dr Emily - Other People Matter - https://bit.ly/3Oku8b4 Dr Emily - Goals For Your Goals - https://bit.ly/4rAK3AF 📖 Things to read How Will I Ever Get Through This by Dr Lucy Hone - https://bit.ly/4bAWO9w Resilient Grieving by Dr Lucy Hone - https://bit.ly/4kpkf8g Oscillation Grief Theory - https://bit.ly/4qZ5WK1 Michael F. Steger - Meaning and Purpose Work - https://michaelfsteger.com J. William Worden - Four Tasks of Mourning - https://bit.ly/3NTGPcU 💻Things to check out Dr Lucy’s website - https://www.drlucyhone.com 3 Secrets of Resilient People TedTalk - https://bit.ly/3Zguj9S Dr Lucy’s ‘Look Forward To’ Calendar VIA Strengths test - http://bit.ly/4h2KYFJ Coping With Loss community on Facebook - https://bit.ly/3NTnDvT Welcome to Holland poem - https://bit.ly/4kgB0lH Will Arnett + Conan O’Brien on Grief - https://bit.ly/4a06320 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Stop. Everything. Now. It’s Claudia Karvan day. 💌Join 5,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy An icon of the screen, and of the heart, Claudia is Australian entertainment royalty. Claudia’s life itself feels like a movie (no one else grew up in a nightclub, did they?) and it was an absolute privilege to listen to all the lessons that she has learnt along the way. With incredible grace, Claudia talks to Hugh, Ryan and Josh about playing the long game during divorce, and how she came to the realisation that it wasn’t up to her to fix everything. Claudia speaks openly about separating the person from the diagnosis, and how, and why, she thinks so often about death. This is one for the highlight reel. If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, click on this link - https://youtu.be/4qH4vBr0i6Y 0:00 – Hugh ‘questionable-decisions’ van Cuylenburg 12:24 – The role of a lifetime 17:55 – An unconventional childhood 28:50 – It’s not up to you to fix everything 39:55 – The opening of another world 45:47 – Doing it all (with support) 51:12 – Love and family HER way 59:33 – Play the long game 1:07:15 – Managing mental ill-health 1:24:39 – The benefit of helping others 1:26:48 – How to love in a healthy way 🥸 Which Imperfects Host Are You Quiz? - https://tally.so/r/Xx4PEO 🫖Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Stephen Curry - I Dug a Hole … and Found Myself - https://bit.ly/3ZpPNkN Hannah Ferguson - Outspoken But Not Broken - https://bit.ly/3M8SC6y 📺 Things to watch Love My Way - https://bit.ly/4qFCjNA The Secret Life of Us - https://bit.ly/3Z1Thtt The Queen of Versailles - https://bit.ly/3Z5FemE Australian Story - The Secret Life of Claudia Karvan - https://bit.ly/3ZE8p0g Who Do You Think You Are? with Claudia Karvan - https://bit.ly/4bIw3QL Bump - https://bit.ly/49O16Jv 📖 Things to read The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying by Sogyal Rinpoche - https://bit.ly/4k8qdtR 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ryan’s got news. Well, past-Ryan had news, and now future-Ryan is going to reflect on how present-day-Ryan is currently feeling about said news. Get it? It’s reflecting on a reflection about a rejection. Today we’re giving you two for the price of none, and bringing you two of the most memorable moments from our subscriber based show A Little More Imperfects. With both segments focusing on wildest dreams, Hugh, Ryan and Josh explore how to navigate regret when you’re not at your best, and how to show yourself compassion and love when your dreams are, well, crushed. Also, we ask Hugh what happened to him today. If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/Ilg-r9gHGPk 🩵Sign up for A Little More Imperfects here Patreon - patreon.com/theimperfects Apple Podcasts - https://bit.ly/4aSIeKd 🩷Sign up to the My Imperfect Email here https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ 🫖Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode James van Cuylenburg - Love Your Wonky Bricks - https://bit.ly/457hYZA Ryan Shelton - Shame, Jealousy & Purpose - https://bit.ly/454PJL6 Isaac Humphries - Coming Out on Court - https://bit.ly/4jQtxtD See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Do you believe in ghosts? Josh doesn’t, Ryan does, and Hugh is actually being haunted. 🎟️ Our live show Together Again is on sale! One show left! Tickets here - https://bit.ly/4mEK9Ep It’s the second episode of our super sexy summer series (the alliteration is wild in this episode), and we’re revisiting the time that Hugh got haunted. Blending together a few episodes of A Little More Imperfects, our subscriber platform that you can sign up for below, we’ll introduce you to Geraint the shamanic healer, what happened during Hugh’s ghost busting appointment, and whether Hugh has had any paranormal activity since. And finally, whether this whole ordeal has convinced Josh that ghosts are real. Long live summer! 0:00 – A phoenus? Draw it 4:17 – Team Josh v Team Ryan 10:28 – Meeting the shamanic healer 16:25 – The not-so-light-hearted update 30:01 – Cursed artwork: to burn or not to burn 35:46 – Has the ghost been busted? If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/u4XNRTLXtrQ 🩵Sign up for A Little More Imperfects here Patreon - patreon.com/theimperfects Apple Podcasts - https://bit.ly/4aSIeKd 🫖Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Maria Ruberto - Advancing Despite Adversity - https://bit.ly/49TSktd Maria Ruberto - Sleep Your Way To Your Top - https://bit.ly/49jJJ2S 👻Ghost busters Garant 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 💌Join 3,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Today, we come to you with a gift: bonus Dr Emily. Thank you in advance for the standing ovation. 🎟️ Our live show Together Again is on sale! One show left! Tickets here - https://bit.ly/4mEK9Ep Welcoming you into the world of A Little More Imperfects, our subscriber-based platform available on Patreon and Apple Podcasts, our resident psychologist Dr Emily reaches into the reflection pond, to discuss and decode a reflection from one of our community members. Responding to this reflection, Dr Emily chats to Ryan, Josh, and special guest Producer Bridge, about how life changing it can be to receive an ADHD diagnosis, as well as the not so joyful emotions, such as grief and anger, which can accompany this. Josh talks about his own inner critic, which leads into a broader discussion about self-compassion, top down vs bottom up therapy, and the therapeutic benefits to showing up for your younger self as the adult you are today. Don’t say we don’t spoil you. If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AzBxIFUOJL0 🩷To join our A Little More Imperfects Community Patreon - https://bit.ly/3KQvB7R Apple Podcasts - https://bit.ly/499aZRs 🩵Where to send in your reflections https://bit.ly/4rYjfuS 🫖Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Janelle Booker - Living with ADHD - https://bit.ly/4rXQIG0 Hugh’s ADHD … brief - https://bit.ly/3MJBzb4 Ben Crowe (Pt 1) - Meet Your Inner Fan - https://bit.ly/3KHwJdX Ben Crowe (Pt 2) - Now BE Your Inner Fan - https://bit.ly/49bVxnB James van Cuylenburg - Love Your Wonky Bricks - https://bit.ly/3MzZKZz What’s Your ATAR? - https://bit.ly/4pwNZBG 📺Things to watch The Rehearsal - https://bit.ly/48V6IA0 Good Will Hunting - https://bit.ly/4iW7hhn Rick Hanson - Velcro for the Bad, Teflon for the Good - https://bit.ly/4rVpe3R 💻 Things to do Rick Hanson - Positive Neuroplasticity Training - https://bit.ly/48COcgN 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 💌Join 3,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Little heads up, this episode contains some language that is exclusively found on the naughty list, and therefore, isn’t suitable for kids. Now, it’s time to spill some Vulnerabili-TEA. It’s our annual holiday episode, and this year, with many thanks to comedian Becky Lucas, we welcome into the studio Little Drummer Girl. Who has some, um, grievances to air. Little Drummer Girl is taking us back in the space-time-continuum to re-write history, and let us in on the scandal which surrounds the infamous lyrics ‘pa rum pum pum pum’. All ad revenue from this episode will be donated to Becky’s chosen charity of HeartKids, who do an incredible job providing lifelong support, resources, and advocacy to the 250,000 people impacted by childhood-onset heart disease. 0:00 – Introducing the Little Drummer Girl 5:50 – The ultimate gift guide 9:51 – An original song, an original crime 15:22 – Sharing enriching information from 20 AD 25:28 – Know what you’re good at 30:20 - Hello Becky, Hello HeartKids If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube (you really do), follow this link - https://youtu.be/oXBEij8q5Tc 🫖Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Santa Claus - A Special Vulnerabilitea House - https://bit.ly/4pDw6B8 Mrs Claus - Santa’s Better Half - https://bit.ly/4559jpJ Little Boy Christmas - The Forgotten Son of Mr & Mrs Claus - https://bit.ly/4iVxGMi Becky Lucas - The power of laughter - https://bit.ly/3KN76Zg 💻Things to do Check out Becky Lucas on instagram - https://bit.ly/3N1ELil Check out the incredible HeartKids organisation - https://www.heartkids.org.au 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 💌Join 3,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy 🩵To join our patreon community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://bit.ly/4mq5BO5 The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dave Hughes has a complicated relationship with his ego. Performing in prestigious venues around the world, Dave Hughes has solidified himself as one of Australia’s comedy icons, but the journey was (and still is) far from easy. Joining us in the studio today, Dave vulnerably shares how the burden of feeling unworthy affected his ability to give and receive love. Dave chats to Ryan about how much he has struggled with comparison, both with others, and the success of his past self, and the role that ego plays in never being able to turn down an opportunity. Hughesy, thank you so much for joining us. 0:00 – Ryan got papped, Hugh got crumpets 7:19 – The failures that lead to success 17:12 – A feeling of general greatness 21:06 – Reckoning with comparison 30:18 – The joy is in the giving 36:03 – Walking the family / work tightrope 41:07 – Humour as a way in 47:56 – You had me at IMAX helmet 56:00 – Ego doesn’t let you enjoy the moment 1:08:10 – Five strategies to let go of ego If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/ogE4j-UQIGY 🫖Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode: Kate Langbroek - Love Story - https://bit.ly/44OH66q Dr Emily - Other People Matter - https://bit.ly/3MqGNZj Pat Cummins - Love, Loss & Life - https://bit.ly/3MtSgqX Cate Campbell - Even Olympians Have Depression - https://bit.ly/44TRhXp 🎄Other Xmas Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode: Santa Claus - A Special Vulnerabilitea House - https://bit.ly/48P0X6V Mrs Claus - Santa’s Better Half - https://bit.ly/44g5M7J Little Boy Christmas - The Forgotten Son of Mr & Mrs Claus - https://bit.ly/3KHqx5F 📖 Things to read A New Earth, by Eckhart Tolle - https://bit.ly/4rPfS9B 💻Things to look up Oprah’s series with Eckhart Tolle - https://bit.ly/48vfOo6 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 💌Join 3,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy 🩵To join our patreon community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://bit.ly/4mq5BO5 The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. The Imperfects acknowledge the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation, as the traditional owners of the land on which this podcast was recorded and we extend our respects to elders past & present. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We’re nervous. We’re excited. We’re nervous and excited. Because it’s Mary freaking Fowler day. 🎟️ Our live show Together Again is on sale now! Tickets here - https://bit.ly/4mEK9Ep Joining us in the Vulnerabilitea House, all the way from Manchester, Mary answers the question ‘what do you worry about the most?’ With wisdom far beyond her 22 years, Mary explains to Hugh, Ryan and Josh the impossible task of being the ‘perfect’ role model, especially when you are still growing up yourself. And then, in a conversation that will help many, and maybe even save the life of a few, Mary graciously shares her experiences with self-harm, and why she thinks it is so important to have the heavy conversations, even with the risk of saying the wrong thing. Mary talks about her journey with pressure and forgiveness that lead her to rediscover ‘Little Mary’, her wall of things that make her feel loved, and how she has been able to reframe her darkest times to find more empathy for others. Mary, it was an absolute dream come true to speak with you. 0:00 – The 2023 Fairy tale 6:52 – What do you worry about most? 23:00 – Giving and taking power 34:01 – Appreciating the little things 41:01 – Saying the hard thing 56:22 – Beauty after pain 1:04:29 – Am I supposed to be here? 1:09:16 – Looking after Little Mary if you would like to watch this full video on YouTube, follow this link: https://youtu.be/O_9Wf0WSfMM 📖Things to read; Bloom, by Mary Fowler - https://bit.ly/443cWw3 🚨If you, or someone you know, is thinking about suicide or self-harm, Lifeline on 13 11 14 is a great place to start. In an emergency, please call 000. 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 💌Join 3,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy 🩵To join our patreon community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://bit.ly/4mq5BO5 The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Is your communication style a red flag? It’s our favourite time of the month and Dr Emily Musgrove, our resident psychologist, is back in the studio to talk the talk (and walk the walk) about healthy communication. The impact of our learning history (colloquially known as “baggage”) gets a heavy feature in this episode, as Ryan, Josh and Bridge unpack their communication styles, and how this has impacted their intimate relationships. Dr Emily talks us through why the real challenge of communicating is not our use of language, but rather regulation of emotion, and gifts us a plethora of acronyms to practice at home the skills of effective communication. Dr Em, always a pleasure. Chapters: 0:00 – Communication, conflict, and Hannah Ferguson 10:19 – How do you (mostly?) communicate? 14:57 – The impact of our learning history 22:10 – Interpersonal Effectiveness 27:41 – Practicing getting it wrong to get it right 31:59 – Do opposites attract? 34:44 – Respond rather than react 47:51 – We all love an acronym 1:01:45 – Dealing with unreasonable people 1:15:49 – Breaking patterns If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - 🫖Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Hannah Ferguson - Outspoken But Not Broken - https://bit.ly/4ilr2i2 Dr Emily - Truth vs Harmony - https://bit.ly/481Xfri 💻Things to do: Complete the official Thomas-Kilmann Instrument communication styles quiz - https://bit.ly/4rowC7m Complete the free Thomas-Kilmann Instrument inspired communication styles quiz - https://bit.ly/4iygpbR 📺 Things to watch: The Rehearsal - https://bit.ly/4ong1hL 📖 Things to read: Terry Real’s catalogue - https://bit.ly/4p25w4m DBT Training Skills Manual, by Marsha M. Linehan - https://bit.ly/4ioNXcs BIFF, by Bill Eddy - https://bit.ly/4ojowdG 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 💌Join 3,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy 🩵To join our patreon community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://bit.ly/4mq5BO5 The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jamila Rizvi has not been the perfect sick person. When Jamila was last in our studio, she was deep in the grief stage. Jamila’s life had been irrevocably changed by the imposition of a brain tumour, and the myriad of health complications due to surgery. To put it simply, Jamila didn’t know who Jamila was anymore, and that terrified her. This week, in the Vulnerabilitea House, Jamila answers the questions “what aspects of your identity have you held onto for too long?” The drip-fed loss of cognitive functions and a new hormone condition which made her constantly starving, Jamila felt like her body and mind were no longer her own. Speaking to Hugh, Josh, and Ryan really honestly, Jamila opens up about her eating disorder during this time; how it impacted her sense of self, her relationships, and ability to connect. Jamila, it was a joy to have you back. We’re so proud of you. Chapters: 0:00 – Where are they now? 7:31 – What aspects of your identity have you held onto for too long? 20:06 – Phases of identity 25:24 – Impact of a brain tumour on a relationship 29:52 – Constantly starving, craving thinness 36:51 – Intense, urgent desperation 48:38 – Train your brain to love your body 54:12 – Would you take it back? 59:39 – Adrenal Crisis and Crisis of Self To watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link: https://youtu.be/A_lE3nSA2Mc 🫖Other episodes of The Imperfects mentioned on this episode Jamila Rizvi - Living with the effects of a brain tumour - https://bit.ly/3M8QR8V Grace Tame - “Sexy-time, Scissoring, Autism” - https://bit.ly/47ZGJqs Clare Bowditch - Music, Panic Attacks & Body Image - https://bit.ly/4pkmFGp 📖Things to read: Broken Brains by Jamila Rizvi and Rosie Waterland - https://bit.ly/48l6JxP 💻Things to look up: The “If And Then” model of happiness - https://bit.ly/4pi0UH6 📱Games to download: 2048 - https://bit.ly/43BHpkx 🦋 If this conversation has raised some uncomfortable feelings for you around eating and food, the Butterfly Foundation 1800 33 4673 is a great place check out - https://butterfly.org.au 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To join our patreon community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://bit.ly/4mq5BO5 The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Troy Kinne’s heart is in the right place. As in, it’s on the wrong side. In fact, many of Troy’s organs are in the ‘wrong’ place. Which can be hard on the immune system, but great material for a stand-up comedian. Joining us in the Vulnerabilitea House, and answering the question, ‘when is a time you’ve felt ashamed?’ Troy takes us on a journey, from being offered a (life)line by a fish and chip shop in his 20’s, to the effect that being sick for an entire year had on his mental health. Troy chats to Josh about the light he found in his darkest times, and how living without fear allowed him to venture into the comedy world for the first time. Speaking about success, and whether it will ever be enough, Troy is really open about what it is like to have to find yourself again after realising that you are no longer the underdog, and how hard it can be to offer your current self compassion. Troy, what a pleasure. If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/ZZm6VAq7g_o Chapters: 0:00 – An episode years in the making 7:40 – When is a time that you’ve felt ashamed? 16:21 – Reality of chronic illness 24:50 – Reality of chronic illness during a pandemic 29:53 – The positive payoff of depression 38:37 – Constantly on the rollercoaster 48:43 – When you’re no longer the Underdog 55:57 – At what point will it be enough? 🫖 Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Hugh & Penny - The Elephant in the Relationship - https://bit.ly/446GPeG 📺 Things to watch The Magic Basket - https://bit.ly/4p0R6RF Dr Google - https://bit.ly/4otHfnE Flint Town Docuseries - https://bit.ly/49TJjAK Fearless - https://bit.ly/444z3Su 📖 Things to read A New Earth, by Eckhart Tolle - https://bit.ly/4oYUrke 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To join our patreon community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://bit.ly/4mq5BO5 The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Do you ever feel anxious about your health? Same. And it is the fundamental uncertainty of our health which can make this anxiety really exhausting, complicated and, well, hard, to live with. Back in the studio with our resident psychologist Dr Emily Musgrove, we’re going to unpack this perpetual state of worry; how it’s exacerbated by our fight or flight response, how to respond when someone’s seeking assurance and how to surf the urge and sit with your discomfort. Josh, being Josh, asks some hard hitting questions about accepting the certainty of death, and Dr Em talks through what it looks like to be so fearful of dying that it’s stopping you from living. Of course, we don’t ever want people to stop getting checked out by a medical professional. This episode is focused on untangling what is worry, what is excessive worry, and when is it reasonable. Dr Em, it was so great to hang out. If you’d like to watch this full video on YouTube, follow this link - 💌Join 3,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy 🫖 Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Bryan Brown - The Value of Being Alive - https://bit.ly/4hTxwok Dr Emily - Grief Lightening - https://bit.ly/3LnCmxP Dr Emily - The Certainty of Uncertainty - https://bit.ly/47XXcfU Dyson Heppell - Whatever It Takes … To Forgive - https://bit.ly/4nIym8F 🎧 Things to listen to: It’s Not What You Think podcast - https://bit.ly/3LnFg5K 📖 Things to read: The Courage To Be Disliked by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga - https://bit.ly/3JJJnZk 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To join our patreon community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://bit.ly/4mq5BO5 Chapters: 0:00 – Our fears for our health 9:54 – Are you a hypochondriac? 15:59 – Exacerbation of the fight / flight response 23:08 – The difficult positions of GP’s 29:48 – Not feeding the loop 35:19 – Body checking and post-diagnosis anxiety 39:50 – Accepting the certainty of death 50:55 – First time parent fear 53:24 – Obsession with being well The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.