The Coaching Question – Details, episodes & analysis

In this episode we continue our exploration of the application of Transactional Analysis in coaching. We build on the previous episode with our fictional case study of Adam.

Adam has moved into a management role where he is managing colleagues who were once teammates, and he is finding it hard to manage their performance. 

We share various coaching techniques we might employ to support Adam, enabling him to understand how best to work with other people. The transition into managing colleagues who were once teammates is one that often comes up in coaching, and we explore how valuable TA can be in understanding how our unconscious drivers can influence our behaviour. 

Listen to this episode to learn various coaching techniques that coaches might employ such as using the ‘allowers’ approach in TA, reframing, non-violent communication, somatic coaching and unpacking beliefs.

In this episode of the Transactional Analysis series of The Coaching Question Podcast, we explore how we might apply TA in our coaching practice using a new fictional case study of a client called Adam.

Adam has recently been promoted to his first 'Manager of Manager' role, struggles to say no, delegate, deal with poor performance and is at danger of burning out. Building on the previous episode, we explore his behavioural drivers and using his challenges as a lens, we illustrate the practical application of TA. 

We share how generating awareness of Driver behaviour leads to clients becoming more aware of the choices they have available to them, rather than sticking with automatic behaviour that their early experiences have taught them.

Listen to this episode to understand more about how TA can add value to coaching challenges and reflect on your own possible triggers and beliefs. 

References:

• The Leadership Pipeline is covered in Season 1, Episode 2
• Feedback and FeedForward are covered in Season 2, Episode 2
• Vertical Development episode is covered in Season 2, Episode 9
• The functional model is described by Samantha Kynaston here
• Ware sequence

Imposter Syndrome often comes up in coaching, but it isn’t always labelled as such. It may show up as a lack of confidence, or self-esteem, self-belief or a drive for perfectionism. 

In this episode we reflect on how, in our experience, imposter syndrome can show up in coaching. We share some of the ways in which we might work with a client who brings this to their coaching session.

Listen in to this episode if you’d like to learn more about imposter syndrome and take away some practical steps to help yourself or support a colleague for whom this may be a challenge. 

Resources:

Meditation

I have a body but I am not my body

I have thoughts but I am not my thoughts

I have physical sensations but I am not my sensations

I have emotional feelings but I am not my feelings

I have beliefs but I am not my beliefs

I play many roles but I am not my roles

I am the self, the watcher who when present can choose in full consciousness

Loving kindness meditation - https://self-compassion.org/

How Women Rise by Sally Helgesen and Marshall Goldsmith - https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Women-Rise-Habits-Holding/dp/1847942245

What Got You Here Won’t Get You There by Marshall Goldsmith - https://www.amazon.co.uk/What-Got-Here-Wont-There/dp/1846681375

Overcoming Imposter Syndrome by Gill Corkindale - https://hbr.org/2008/05/overcoming-imposter-syndrome 

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z29ptSuoWRc

Brené Brown video - it's not the critics who count -  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8-JXOnFOXQk

Onboarding is an area in which coaching can play a crucial role in supporting the successful transition of a senior leader. So often, organisations focus on the selection and assessment of the new hire, but the importance of setting that new hire up for success can be easily overlooked.

In this episode we interview Gillian Frame, an executive coach who does a lot of work in this space. There are many insights and observations that Gillian shares about the process of joining a new organisational culture. The key things for leaders to consider as they adjust to the demands of the role, the expectations of stakeholder and themselves and the way in which they establish themselves in the role.

Listen in to this episode if you are interested in how coaching can support transitions, specifically onboarding and a successful first 90 days in a new role.

About Gillian Frame:

Gill has been coaching in business for over 20 years. She works regularly with people who are preparing themselves to move into a new role or new organisation. Aside from coaching, she has a long standing bread-making habit and likes to feel creative by practicing her silver jewellery making and taking photographs, particularly of mushrooms and fungus. 

Resources

The First 90 Days by Michael Watkins - https://www.amazon.co.uk/First-Days-Updated-Expanded-Strategies/dp/1422188612

HBR – Onboarding a new leader – remotely: https://hbr.org/2020/05/onboarding-a-new-leader-remotely

HBR When do we really need face-to-face interactions: https://hbr.org/search?search_type=search-all&term=Michael+watkins+hybrid

In this episode we have a really open discussion about our experiences developing as coaches and reflect not only on the journey we have both been on to date, but the journeys we continue to be on.

Many coaches, when they first start out, can be quite focussed on particular models, frameworks or niches, but over time they learn through practice and their approach is always evolving. This is similar to Carol Dweck’s work on growth mindset - the concept that there is always more to learn.

We also reflect on our experiences of supervision, coaching, accreditation, mentor coaching, reflection and learning. Developing as a coach requires us to constantly learn, put our learning into practice, reflect on our practice, take our experience to supervision and learn some more. 

Listen in to this episode if you are a coach keen to understand how you can continue to broaden and deepen your practice, and for organisations hiring coaches, listening may help you to decide how best to select coaches to partner with.

In this episode we look at how concepts like birth order theory can be a gateway to insights into how we’re all shaped by our family of origin, which is where we learn to take on certain roles. We look into how valuable it is to explore the hidden dimensions that are playing out in our relationships at work.

We’re not interested in ‘doing’ therapy with clients, but we are interested in how the decisions made in early childhood are unconsciously playing out now. These will have worked for us in the past, but there’s a very good chance that these same decisions, programming, roles that we play, are no longer beneficial. We need to bring them into our awareness in order to make different choices.

Resources:

What Got You Here Won’t Get You There by Marshall Goldsmith - shorturl.at/gmFN4

How Women Rise by Sally Helgesen - shorturl.at/kuwF8

Esther Perel How’s work podcast - https://howswork.estherperel.com/

In this episode we look at a relatively new area of coaching - Pairs Coaching. The main focus of this work to date seems to be in the area of Boards and Exec teams where the importance of robust working relationships built on trust, confidence and good communication cannot be underestimated. 

Pairs coaching is an extremely effective way of building powerfully strong relationships between two leaders. Two coaches, highly trained in the Cape Cod model of Pairs coaching, work directly with two individuals to focus on the relationship between them.

We are joined by a highly skilled practitioner, Lucy Ball and get her insights into this new area of coaching, which is likely to have a profound impact on coaching within organisations in the future.

Resources:

More about Lucy and her work in pairs coaching - https://www.executivepairs.com

In this episode we are joined by James Edgar, who comes with over 20 years experience in the HR field. We wanted to speak with James because he has the experience of being a user and commissioner of coaching as well as being an experienced coach himself.

We talk to James about what advice he would have for his younger self and reflect on his experience of leading a global people function through Covid. We reflect on how the pandemic has emphasised the need for connection and clarity and explored the role of HR in the coaching relationship.  Often it is the case that HR commits the budget for the coaching, but can become disconnected with the coaching that is taking place.. Unsurprisingly he feels contracting at the start is crucial, and getting clear on roles and responsibilities is key. 

Resources:

James Edgar on LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/jamesedgar25/

This episode’s question is “Why does menopause coaching matter for diversity, inclusion and wellbeing?"

We explore what menopause coaching can look like, the ethics around menopause coaching and of course learn more about the experience of menopause itself.

We found this episode fascinating and great fun to record with the energetic Kate Usher. She’s an experienced coach and change strategist with a specialism in menopause and gender equality. Kate’s also an internationally published author with a book called Your Second Phase: reclaiming work and relationships during and after menopause. She was shortlisted for the business book of the year award 2021.

Menopause is a life phase that's going to affect 50% of the population directly and the other fifty percent indirectly. Because menopause has for so long had this taboo around it we need some help in how to have productive conversations.

The confirmed statistic at the moment is that 10% of all women leave paid employment altogether because of menopause. However, it could be as high as 25% of all women leaving paid employment altogether because of it. 

Menopausal women are the fastest growing workforce demographic so menopause has huge implications for not only diversity and inclusion but business performance overall. The business case is clear.

Resources:

Kate’s email: kateusher@outlook.com 

Kate on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kateusher/ 

Kate’s Website: https://secondphase.co.uk 

Welcome to this bonus episode, where we reflect on changes that have occurred since our recording on these topics, this time in Season 2, and some insights we’ve had since!

When we came back to look at Season 2, we noticed a theme around investment in time, effort & money. 

Some of the things we look at include:

How the UK’s performance in recent Olympic games has benefited from the above mentioned investment. This relates to how making coaching accessible to everyone, or at least more of the population can get a great return.

One of our reflections from both seasons 1 & 2 is that the future, and the situation with Covid is uncertain, so coaching can prove an even more useful tool (as opposed to interventions like training). Leaders need to develop agility and resilience, another reason people need coaching to help them navigate uncertainty. 

The Environment section of John Anderson’s Performance Coaching model, which he has used so well with Olympians.

How we missed diversity of thought when it comes to Diversity & Inclusion agendas and this was reflected in a recent government report.

Resources:

PinkCast on FeedForward - https://www.danpink.com/pinkcast/pinkcast-4-13-this-is-how-big-time-performers-get-the-feedback-they-need/ 

Linking Developmental Action Logics to Transformational Leadership Behaviours - shorturl.at/djnC0