The Sex and Psychology Podcast is the sex ed you never got in school—and won’t find anywhere else. Kinsey Institute researcher Dr. Justin Lehmiller takes you on a journey through the psychology of sex and relationships, offering practical tips along the way that can help you take your intimate life to the next level. Learn more on Dr. Lehmiller’s blog at sexandpsychology.com
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Episode 541: How to Calm Attachment Anxiety
Episode 541
Friday, October 2, 2026 • Duration 31:20
For some people, relationships can bring a lot of anxiety and uncertainty. They might question whether their partner really loves them, become highly sensitive to signs of rejection or distance, or constantly seek reassurance. But where does this anxiety come from, and what can we do about it? In this episode, we’re exploring why some people are especially sensitive to disconnection, how anxiety shapes communication and conflict, and how to feel more secure in your relationships.
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Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today.
***
Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.
Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!
Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest (photo credit Amy K. Wright).
Episode 540: Why You Pull Away When Relationships Get Close
Episode 540
Tuesday, September 29, 2026 • Duration 32:16
When relationships start to feel too close, some people instinctively pull away. They might shut down emotionally, avoid difficult conversations, crave more space, or convince themselves they’re better off on their own. But where does this tendency come from, and what is it protecting us from? In this episode, we’re taking a deep dive into attachment avoidance. We’ll explore why some people become uncomfortable with closeness, the subtle ways avoidance can show up, and more.
Episode 539: The Most Common Questions Sex Therapists Get Asked
Episode 539
Friday, September 25, 2026 • Duration 33:09
What are the most common questions that come up in sex therapy? In this episode, we're revisiting an important conversation from the archives that dives into five questions that come up over and over again. We’re also going to address when you should consider seeing out professional help for a sex problem and explore a few tips for maintaining happy, healthy, and exciting sex lives for the long haul.
My guest is Rachel Zar, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and AASECT-Certified Sex Therapist. She holds a Master’s of Science in Marriage and Family Therapy from The Family Institute at Northwestern University, a PhD in Clinical Sexology, and certificates in sex therapy and sexuality education from the University of Michigan. Dr. Zar is a clinical supervisor at Avid Intimacy, a sex and relationship therapy private practice in Chicago.
Some of the questions we answer include:
What if I can’t orgasm during sex?
What if my partner wants more sex than I do?
How do I ask my partner to try something new?
We’re having less sex than we used to. Is something wrong?
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Episode 538: How To Get Out Of Your Head During Sex
Episode 538
Tuesday, September 22, 2026 • Duration 34:09
Your brain really is your biggest sex organ. And if you want to have more (and better) sex, getting into the right headspace can make all the difference. The problem is that many of us have a hard time getting there. So how can we quiet the mental noise and become more present during sex? In this episode, we’re revisiting a classic episode from the archives on how changing your mindset can change your sex life for the better.
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Episode 537: The Sex History You Were Never Taught
Episode 537
Friday, September 18, 2026 • Duration 33:29
We often assume that people in the past were far more sexually conservative than we are today, and that things like sex toys, pornography, and masturbation are largely modern phenomena. But when you dig into the history of sex, you quickly discover that human beings have been remarkably creative in their pursuit of pleasure for a very long time. In this episode, we’re going to explore some of the strangest and most surprising chapters in the history of sex.
Episode 536: Was The Bridgerton Era As Sexy As We Think?
Episode 536
Tuesday, September 15, 2026 • Duration 32:19
Shows like Bridgerton invite us to imagine the past as a time of elaborate courtship, forbidden desire, and passionate romance. But was the past really as sexy as we like to think it was? In today’s show, we’re going to separate fact from fantasy when it comes to sex in the Bridgerton era and discuss what dating, courtship, marriage, and sexual relationships actually looked like at the time.
Episode 535: Why Kink Works For Neurodiverse Brains
Episode 535
Friday, September 11, 2026 • Duration 34:25
For many neurodivergent people, BDSM offers something conventional sexual practices often don’t, including clear communication, explicit expectations, structure, and the freedom to tailor experiences to their own needs. In this episode, we’re going to explore why people with ADHD, autism, and other forms of neurodivergence are often drawn to kink, as well as tips on making sex work with your brain instead of against it.
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Episode 534: The Complicated Relationship Between BDSM And Mental Health
Episode 534
Tuesday, September 8, 2026 • Duration 32:08
BDSM can be a powerful source of pleasure, connection, and self-expression. But when mental health challenges enter the picture, they can also raise important questions about consent, communication, triggers, and emotional safety. So how can people navigate kink in ways that support their mental health rather than undermine it?
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Episode 533: A Beginner's Guide To Swinging
Episode 533
Friday, September 4, 2026 • Duration 36:56
For some couples, swinging can be a way to bring novelty, excitement, and sexual exploration into their relationship. But opening the door to new experiences can also bring new challenges, from jealousy and boundary-setting to navigating differences in what each partner wants. So why do couples decide to swing, what does it actually look like in practice, and what separates a positive experience from one that creates conflict? In this episode, we’re taking a deep dive into swinging and what it takes to make it work.
I am joined once again by Dr. Stephanie Sigler, a licensed professional counselor, certified sex therapist, clinical sexologist, author, educator, and founder of Evolve Your Intimacy. She specializes in helping individuals and couples navigate relationships, intimacy, attachment, trauma, and sexual wellness. She is the author of The Clinician's Guide to Ethical Non-Monogamous Relationships, and host of the Evolve Your Intimacy Podcast.
Some of the specific topics we cover include:
What distinguishes a swinging relationship from other forms of consensual non-monogamy?
What are some of the different forms swinging can take?
What are some or the most common challenges couples face when they begin swinging?
How should couples approach initial conversations about swinging if they've never tried it before?
When partners aren't equally interested in swinging or their interests change, what should you do?
Jealousy is one of the most complicated—and misunderstood—emotions we experience in intimate relationships. We tend to think of jealousy as inherently unhealthy, something we should suppress, overcome, or eliminate altogether. But what if jealousy itself isn’t actually the problem? In this episode, we explore what jealousy is really trying to tell us, why attempts to get rid of it can sometimes backfire, and how we can learn to respond to it in healthier ways.
Attached Therapy offers personalized therapy for individuals and couples navigating infidelity, sexual disconnection, relationship strain, and other complex intimacy concerns. Founder Jason Powell, LMFT and AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, offers in-person sessions in Manhattan and Brooklyn Heights, as well as virtual therapy in multiple states. Learn more at https://www.attachedtherapy.com/
Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.
Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!
Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest (photo credit Amy K. Wright).
Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today.
***
Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.
Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!
Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.
Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!
Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
Thank you to our sponsors!
Level-up your bedroom skills with Beducated. Featuring more than 150 online courses taught by the experts, Beducated brings pleasure-based sex ed directly into your bedroom. Kick off your journey by taking Beducated’s Quiz to get your personalized roadmap to sexual happiness at https://beduc.at/pd2638-lehmiller
If you’re 21 or older, get 30% OFF your first order with IndaCloud with code JUSTIN at https://indacloud.co #indacloudpod
Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.
Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!
Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
Thank you to our sponsors!
If you’re 21 or older, get 30% OFF your first order with IndaCloud with code JUSTIN at https://indacloud.co #indacloudpod
Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today.
***
Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.
Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!
Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
https://www.oneskin.co/justin
Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today.
If you're ready to ditch the shady stuff and choose a libido supplement that’s effective and that you can feel confident about, it's time to check out Load Boost. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off.
***
Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.
Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!
Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
The Kinsey Institute is where the world turns to understand sex and relationships. You can help continue its expert-led research by donating to the Kinsey Institute Research Fund. Learn more and make a donation here: https://give.myiu.org/centers-institutes/I380010749.html
Load Boost is a supplement designed to improve the taste, volume, and overall health of your semen. If you want to elevate your sexual performance, check out Load Boost from VB Health. Visit vb.health to learn more and save 10% with code JUSTIN.
***
Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.
Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!
Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
***
Thank you to our sponsors!
If you’re 21 or older, get 30% OFF your first order with IndaCloud with code JUSTIN at https://indacloud.co #indacloudpod
Attached Therapy offers personalized therapy for individuals and couples navigating infidelity, sexual disconnection, relationship strain, and other complex intimacy concerns. Founder Jason Powell, LMFT and AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, offers in-person sessions in Manhattan and Brooklyn Heights, as well as virtual therapy in multiple states. Learn more at https://www.attachedtherapy.com/
Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today.
***
Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.
Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!
Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
Thank you to our sponsors!
If you’re 21 or older, get 30% OFF your first order with IndaCloud with code JUSTIN at https://indacloud.co #indacloudpod
Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.
Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!
Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
