Prime Cuts – Details, episodes & analysis

Alright so you've got two guys. One of them is an evil clone controlled by your arch rival. You can't tell which is which. So how do you solve it? Do you A) Question the clones separately based on knowledge only the original would have access to? or B) Have a race and shoot at a rock? The answer may surprise you! This datatrack includes discussion of the following topics; Soundwave's Secret Sons, Megatron's unhealthy obsession with Spike, Starscream's clonelust, Powerglide (who has been here the whole time), mind control (but its ok because the good guys are doing it), Sunstreaker never forgetting big wet things, Gestalt jerkoff philosophy, and Forbidden Devastator Components.

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TORQ, generate picture of sexy female robot ninja, purple and black with yellow eyes, sleek silhouette, lots of knives, badass ninja skills, and huge [REDACTED]. This datatrack contains discussion of the following topics; Day of the Machines hitting too close to home, TORQ's battlebots rejects, Skyfire's continuing Busification, smart doorknobs, Doctor Fujiyama (the famous scientist), Nightbird's REAL function, gay coding, Jazz' ninja movie phase, and the question of Nightbird's sentience.

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Transformers Earthrise stumbles and falls face first into an utterly deranged conclusion. Here are a list of actual things that happen in the final two episodes of Earthrise; Sky Lynx becomes Optimus Prime's spiritual guide, a JPEG of Unicron slurps Galvatron through reality, Cog turns into Solid Snake, The Decepticons invade the Ark and get beaten in less than a minute, Optimus asks Megatron to forgive him, Elita One (probably) dies along with every other Autobot on Cybertron, the Quintessons do absolutely nothing, Earth shows up very briefly, and Dinobot is in the stinger of the episode.

Or for a more brief synopsis: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRGH!!!!

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Oooooh, we've got a pair of spine chilling spook em ups for you this week; zombies, possession, and being trapped in limbo forever, just in time for...The Fourth of July? Doesn't seem quite right. Well, while we have you here we have some pamphlets about the dangers of Dark Energon to give you, and if you come to the seminar you get a free t-shirt. All you gotta do is...hey, where are ya going!?

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This week its all about people who wanna kill each other (but in a little bit of a fruity way). Cassidy (@whatiscosplay) joins us this week to talk about the debut of the evil sexy spider lady Airachnid, as she tries to murder Arcee (but also does the Spider-Man kiss pose so you know something else is goin on there.) Also this week, Bumblebee Psychonauts his way into Megatron's mind, Soundwave has very upsetting fingers, and Jack manages to be a nerd about camping. Isn't it kinda gay to have an arch rival? I mean, what's he arching, his back?

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Whoa, two new Decepticons! And they didn't die during their debut episode! AND they're gay??? What a treat! This week we're covering episodes 10 and 11. Miko learns a lot about Ancient Greece, a car flirts with a truck, Jack becomes involved in the world of illegal street racing, and we come to a horrible conclusion about Cybertronian bodily fluids.

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Amogus, dingus, and Wheeljack, oh my! This week friend of the pod Argyle joins us to talk about episodes 8 and 9 of Prime's first season. First, Bulkhead's old boyfrien-I mean war buddy pops by Earth for a visit, but Starscream sends a very sus imposter to take his place and get intel on Autobase. Then Fowler calls in with D.N.G.S trouble, and the Autobots find themselves in a mid series Fast and Furious film, complete with tech obsessed Terrorists. Oh also Arcee kills a bunch of humans in this one, but its ok because she's kind of a girlboss. Hey, you wanna go for some Lobbing after this, bro?

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I assure you Starscream and Megatron have a completely normal relationship. It is absolutely regular to straddle your boss' half dead form and whisper in his ear as you tear the only thing keeping him alive out of his chest. Also this week, Bumblebee commits one of the most heinous acts of violence on the show so far, Arcee and Optimus get a little bit cold, and Raf becomes a murderer. Remember. just because Soundwave is totally silent doesn't mean he isn't plotting your cancellation at all times.

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This week we're finishing 5 part premier of Transformers Prime, Darkness Rising. A lot happens in these two episodes, including Optimus tapping into his Bayverse incarnation's rampant bloodlust, Megatron using Starscream like a stress ball, the children nearly dying a whole lot, and Fowler being tortured so much he gets drunk. Anyway you don't care about that, you want to hear about the Prime DILF rankings and discussion about how Soundwave Likes To Watch. RIP Megatron, who certainly won't be coming back ever.

Also we forgot to mention it in the actual episode but we're gonna be off next week.

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We're back with an all new season, this time covering the first season of Transformers Prime! We bring you a podcast covering Darkness Rising parts 1-3 that is nearly twice as long as the episodes themselves because Prime is Just That Good. Join us as we talk about the dangers of using devil drugs, Starscream's bottom coding, and how a 12 year old can hack into the Pentagon. And Cliffjumper is there! The whole time! As a perfectly alive guy!

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