Not Your Average Autism Mom – Details, episodes & analysis

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Not Your Average Autism Mom

Shannon Urquiola

Kids & Family

Frequency: 1 episode/8d. Total Eps: 219

This podcast was started for parents and caregivers raising autistic children but it has evolved and we have listeners across the world who are relatives of someone with autism, special education teachers, and other professionals. My son Jordan was diagnosed with autism when he was 5 years old, now 28. I have been where you are. Jordan will likely never live independently. I am in the trenches every day, just like you. Each week I talk about topics that directly impact your life and go hand in hand with your unique parenting journey. info@notyouraverageautismmom.com Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shannon-urquiola/support

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Apple Podcasts

🇨🇦 Canada - parenting
24/12/2024
#95

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https://www.notyouraverageautismmom.com/
104 shares
https://www.notyouraverageautismmom.com/webinar
45 shares
https://www.notyouraverageautismmom.com/blog/96-our-parenting-journey-is-different
35 shares

https://www.facebook.com/NotYourAverageAutismMom2020
61 shares
https://www.facebook.com/groups/thenotyouraverageautismmommovement
55 shares

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RSS feed quality

Good

Score global : 73%

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209. Why Uncertainty Triggers Meltdowns: Understanding Escalating Behaviors (Part 1)

Season 1 · Episode 209

Thursday, December 19, 2024 • Duration 11:32

This is Part 1 of a 2-part series where Shannon dives into why uncertainty can feel overwhelming for children on the autism spectrum and how it often leads to escalating behaviors like hyperactivity, meltdowns, or resistance. She shares relatable stories from families and explains how disrupted routines and unpredictable situations, like holiday chaos, can amplify anxiety for our kids.

In this episode, Shannon unpacks strategies for creating a sense of predictability, including mental maps, structured routines, and sensory tools to help your child feel more secure. You’ll gain practical tips to navigate these challenging moments and be reminded that even when it feels hard, you are doing AMAZING at this mom thing.

Don’t miss this insightful discussion about understanding your child’s behavior and preparing for the follow-up episode next week in part 2 where we’ll explore resistance and opposition even further!

Tune in for encouragement, strategies, and the reminder that you’re stronger than you think. 💙

🌟 Leave a Review:

If this episode resonates with you, share your thoughts and experiences by leaving a review. Your feedback supports the podcast and creates a space for other parents to find inspiration and connection.

Are you registered for our FREE Webinar?

Finding Strength & Resilience; A Mom's Guide to Autism Parenting

Click the link below for the details

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get the Details

We can overcome challenges and create a brighter future for our families.

P.S. Feeling overwhelmed and ready for a change? When you're ready to take control and see different results, check out our Not Your Average Autism Mom private membership.

Access exclusive support, training and resources to save you a ton of time, and a community that truly understands.

Join us and discover how amazing this journey can be!⁠⁠⁠ https://www.notyouraverageautismmom.com/⁠⁠⁠

Additional Resources:

Join ⁠⁠The Not Your Average Autism Mom Movement⁠⁠ group on FB

If there is a specific topic that you would like us to talk about on the podcast, email us directly at ⁠⁠⁠info@notyouraverageautismmom.com⁠⁠⁠

Have you listened to these episodes yet?

⁠74. You Cannot Fix All the Things ALL the Time

201. Breaking Barriers; Why Low Expectations Hold Our Kids Back

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208. The Perfect Mom Myth; It's a Balancing Act

Season 1 · Episode 208

Thursday, December 12, 2024 • Duration 17:11

Being a mom is hard, but being a mom to a child on the autism spectrum? That’s a whole new level of challenging.

In this episode, Shannon dives into the pressure many of us feel as we strive to be “perfect” and why striving for perfection often leads to burnout and frustration.

She shares personal stories from her journey with Jordan, including the early years of isolation and what she’s learned about the importance of community, self-care, and letting go of comparison. From advocating effectively for your child to rediscovering your own identity, this episode is packed with relatable scenarios and actionable tips to help you find balance.

Remember, your child doesn’t need a perfect mom—they need a happy, present one. Tune in to learn how to thrive on this unexpected parenting journey while still taking care of yourself.

Tune in for encouragement, strategies, and the reminder that you’re stronger than you think. 💙

🌟 Leave a Review:

Are you registered for our FREE Webinar?

Finding Strength & Resilience; A Mom's Guide to Autism Parenting

Click the link below for the details

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get the Details

We can overcome challenges and create a brighter future for our families.

P.S. Feeling overwhelmed and ready for a change? When you're ready to take control and see different results, check out our Not Your Average Autism Mom private membership.

Access exclusive support, training, and resources to save you a ton of time, and a community that truly understands.

--- Support this podcast:

199. Fast Emotions; A Guide to Regulating Intensity

Season 1 · Episode 199

Thursday, October 3, 2024 • Duration 18:04

In this episode of Not Your Average Autism Mom, we’re tackling the whirlwind of fast emotions and intense behaviors that can overwhelm children on the autism spectrum. When your child goes from calm to chaotic in an instant, how do you help them slow down and stay regulated? Today, we’re diving into practical strategies, including the powerful technique of “pacing.”

Learn how matching your child’s intensity with calmness can make a huge difference in both emotional and behavioral regulation. We’ll break down easy-to-apply methods to keep your child grounded and connected while helping them manage those big emotions.

Tune in for encouragement, insights, and actionable advice to help you keep going, stay strong, and never give up. You’ve got this!

🌟 Leave a Review: If this episode resonates with you, share your thoughts and experiences by leaving a review. Your feedback supports the podcast and creates a space for other parents to find inspiration and connection.

Are you registered for our FREE Webinar?

Finding Strength & Resilience; A Mom's Guide to Autism Parenting

Click the link below for the details

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.notyouraverageautismmom.com/webinar ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Together, we can overcome challenges and create a brighter future for our families.

P.S. Feeling overwhelmed and ready for a change? When you're ready to take control and see different results, check out our private membership.

Access exclusive support, training and resources to save you a ton of time, and a community that truly understands. Join us and discover how amazing this journey can be! ⁠⁠https://www.notyouraverageautismmom.com/⁠⁠

Additional Resources:

Join ⁠ group on FB

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119. Sibling Talk with Maddie

Season 1 · Episode 119

Thursday, January 12, 2023 • Duration 28:25

Today we have our very first guest on the podcast, and who better than my daughter, Jordan's sister, Madison?

Maddie and I talk about her experience growing up with a brother with autism and a single mom.

It is a candid and open conversation and she shares her perspective on what it was like and the differences she sees now as a young adult.

What was the most difficult part for you growing up with a brother on the spectrum?
Do you remember me explaining Jordan's autism to you at various times to help you understand?
Did you ever feel like you were missing out on anything because of Jordan?
Were there any times that you can remember when he did something that embarrassed you?
Are there any things that you worry about as Jordan get's older?
How do you see that your relationship has changed as you are both young adults now?

I believe that Madison growing up with an autistic brother gave her compassion and understanding at a very young age. She is the least judgmental person I know and I think much of that comes from having a brother that was different.

If you want to learn strategies and tools that you can use to improve your life along this autism parenting journey, becoming Not Your Average Autism Mom is your answer. Is the educational journey overwhelming and confusing for you? Our member portal has an array of training and resources with everything you need to know about Special Education and you can join LIVE ZOOM calls with an Advocate to get any of your specific questions answered. Maybe you are feeling alone on your journey or maybe you are looking for other moms to connect with in a PRIVATE community who understand your day-to-day challenges, be sure that you check out ALL THE BENEFITS available for you when you BECOME Not Your Average Autism Mom.

www.notyouraverageautismmom.com

Additional Resources:

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118. Support isn’t Optional, it is Essential

Season 1 · Episode 118

Thursday, January 5, 2023 • Duration 25:32

It isn't uncommon to feel like you are losing yourself in this parenting journey and you find yourself feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, frustrated, and alone, right? You might have even had thoughts that you aren’t cut out for this autism parenting thing and you constantly feel like you aren’t doing enough. Caring for a child on the spectrum takes a lot of time and energy parenting isn’t easy and when you add in autism, it’s usually next level.

Whether you have been here for a while with me or if you are brand new to me, you will hear me say all the time that you cannot travel this journey without support, honestly, it just isn’t sustainable. You will need help learning how to manage your feelings when faced with the challenges along this autism parenting journey that I promise you, you will come upon.

Raising a child on the spectrum is difficult for the entire family not to mention your extended family and friends who likely aren’t going to understand it and they might not even agree with it. You are going to need to learn how to manage your own emotions and feelings when you come up against these unique challenges. Find yourself a support network. It can be so easy when things are difficult along this journey for you to isolate yourself, please don’t do that. Don’t struggle to manage it alone. Loneliness will only increase your feelings of anxiety, depression, and isolation.

Your family and friends will likely respond in various ways and they might find it difficult to support you or they might respond in ways that actually aren’t very helpful. I want you to feel totally capable of handling anything that comes your way. That is always my goal as I work with our moms. I help them to become the mom they want to be and build a life of resilience while embracing this unique parenting journey that we are on.

Maybe you are a single parent, and that brings with it, its own set of unique challenges but you are not broken, your family is not damaged and when you are willing to give up your story about how much harder your life is than everyone else, you can stop being so frustrated with your life and yourself. You will stop doubting your parenting and instead have confidence in yourself knowing that you are doing the best you can with what you know at any time. If you don’t take care of yourself and your emotional well-being along the way, you won’t be able to be the best parent to your child that they need you to be.

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117. Let's Dump the Mom Guilt

Season 1 · Episode 117

Thursday, December 29, 2022 • Duration 26:07

Ever hear that inner voice telling you that you weren't made for this autism parenting journey? It's too hard and you don't have enough patience to withstand it?

What about this? Do you ever feel guilty because you just want time away from your kids? Do you feel guilty for loving your job and going to work and you think that those stay-at-home moms must be much better moms than you?

Maybe over the holiday break screen time limits have gone out the window or you’ve been through the fast food drive thru’s too many times or maybe you are continuously doubting if you’re doing things right or maybe you think that decisions you are making are going to have long term negative consequences for your child.

The truth is, there are so many reasons that we feel mom guilt. Sometimes it might be coming from your own personal insecurities or maybe it’s from your family members or it might be that you acted out in anger, and lost your cool, and before you knew it, you were yelling which isn’t typical for you, have you been there?

Do you ever feel guilty because you just want time away from your kids? STOP THAT. It can be so easy to lose yourself along this journey of caring for your child.

When you can share your fears and self-doubt with other moms, you will often find that not only are you not alone but like-minded women can help each other let go of unrealistic comparisons that fuel mom guilt.

Make sure your expectations of yourself are reasonable and attainable and allow space for downtime. For some of you, your mom guilt may come from past trauma or maybe you are focused on doing it better than your parent or parents did. If that is you, I want to encourage you to journal and give yourself a chance to see your thinking on paper. Once you can identify your triggers, it allows you to move past it and create your own truth as a parent.

If you’ve been ruminating over anything that has you feeling that mom guilt, I want to encourage you to let it go and give yourself grace that you too mama are learning along this journey and it’s bumpy and messy sometimes along the way, and every day is a new adventure.

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116. Relationship Challenges when Parenting an Autistic Child

Season 1 · Episode 116

Thursday, December 22, 2022 • Duration 14:08

An autism diagnosis can definitely take a toll on a family and very well could be a contributing factor to divorce and on the other hand, some couples come together and grow stronger every day.

For parents like us, raising autistic children, our life can be pretty crazy and unpredictable.

Having an autistic child does not mean that your marriage is going to fail. I have worked with some families who felt like their bond became stronger as a couple because they were on the same page looking for answers to support their child so I believe that depending on the strength of the marriage before autism determines the outcome after the diagnosis.

Here is what we know… we know that living with an autistic person changes the entire family dynamic and it can place a huge strain on the parent's relationship.

Communication is the key to keeping a relationship strong. You have to be willing to listen. You have to be open to hearing their opinions even when you don’t agree with them. You have to be willing to agree to disagree and then be willing to meet in the middle. Learning to compromise and find a common ground will help maintain a strong relationship.

Every phase along this journey that your child and your family go through will be a new experience and there are many. I think the bottom line is that an autism diagnosis doesn’t mean that a marriage or a relationship will fail, but it is important that you take the steps to alleviate the stress to allow for a better chance of succeeding and overcoming the obstacles along the way and most of all, make time for each other.

Additional Resources:

41. Emotional Ups and Downs of Raising a Child with Autism

60. The Most Important Relationship in your Autism Parenting Journey

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115. Judgment and Parent Shaming

Season 1 · Episode 115

Thursday, December 15, 2022 • Duration 18:27

We harbor so many unspoken fears, anxiety, and often hopelessness not to mention wanting to be the perfect parent to our child and then the guilt that comes along for the ride when we feel like we are falling short, right? I know, I’ve been there too. In this episode, I am going to talk about something that every single one of us comes up against along this autism parenting journey and that is judgment from other people.

Autism can’t be seen and sometimes the things that we have to do for our children who to the unsuspecting public may seem too old for these things. Even though 1 in 44 children are diagnosed autistic, unfortunately, there are still way more people in the world we live in who don’t know anything about autism.

I think one of the most important things that you can do for yourself is to remind yourself that they aren’t intentionally being rude, they simply don’t understand your child’s behavior or why you are doing what you are doing or why they are doing what they are doing. It's a lack of understanding.

What I don’t want you to do is let the public’s perception of you or your child dictate the course of your life. I want you to know that you have NOTHING to be embarrassed about. Your child has autism and while the outside world may not all understand and may offer too much-unsolicited advice, retreating into your home and avoiding the public won’t be beneficial for you or your child and they will never have the opportunity to learn the skill set they need if you isolate.

As the parent of autistic children, it is important that you hold your head high and realize that despite having one of the most challenging jobs in the world, your consistency and diligence to figure it out day after day, even on the days you think you just can’t and yet you do, you are becoming a better person every day because of what your child or children are teaching you along the way.

All the judgment in the world, the looks, the comments, and the opinions of other people only affect you if you let them. You have a choice.

No one knows your situation. No one will ever fully understand your child’s struggles or the unique dynamics of your family. They don’t understand your situation and therefore cannot ever make an informed judgment.

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114. The Holidays Look Different in our House

Season 1 · Episode 114

Thursday, December 8, 2022 • Duration 19:53

Sometimes, in our autism homes, the holidays are as stressful as they are joyful but much of that comes back to you and how willing you are to do things differently. Most people assume that everyone enjoys receiving gifts, especially children right? But if your child exhibits more stress and difficult behaviors when they receive gifts, maybe it is time to try something new this year.

I spent way too many years, expecting Jordan to show his excitement in a way I believed was typical and how I thought he should and being so disappointed when he didn’t react to his gifts the way I thought he should. What if instead of following traditions or having unrealistic expectations you explore ways to help your child learn to enjoy this special time?

I think it is important to not leave gift-giving from your family open to random gifts. Take time to communicate with the people in your life who will be buying gifts for your child. Taking the time to do this ahead of time will make gift giving and receiving so much better for not just your child but also for those family members or friends who are giving the gifts.

Each of our children have individual characteristics and while the holidays and gift giving and receiving may not be what you imagined, like so many other things along this unique autism parenting journey we are all on, it is important that you don’t get fixated on how things should be or what normal looks like and instead accepting your child and your family just as they are and most important, being willing to do the holidays different and in a way that works for you and your family without worrying about what anyone else thinks it should or shouldn’t be.

Additional Resources:

109. Why Waiting is so Difficult

67. Changing your Script in the New Year

If there is a specific topic that you would like us to talk about on the podcast, email us directly at

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113. Helpful Holiday Reminders

Season 1 · Episode 112

Thursday, December 1, 2022 • Duration 21:39

The holidays can be a magical time, but for us who are parenting a child on the spectrum, there is often additional pressure from so many different directions. We all likely have family members who don’t understand, right?

In this episode, I am going to focus on giving you permission to do the Holidays however it works for you and your family. There are no rules… the holidays can be whatever you want them to be and whatever is best for your child and you. You don’t have to say yes. You don’t have to go.

I believe that as their parent, it is our job to control the small things that we do have control over so when the things that we can’t control happen it makes it easier for them to deal with.

What if you decide ahead of time that your child is counting on you to set boundaries that help them feel safe what if you decide to make the holidays about what they can do right now, at this moment? You cannot control what other people in your family think about your decisions and it’s important that you don’t create more stories in your head about what they do or don’t think. You don’t owe anyone an explanation.

Sometimes, you might choose to tell people what to expect. You aren’t asking for approval or disapproval, you are just giving them insight into what they might expect, and in doing so, let them know that it is ok, you know how to handle it and it is no big deal.

Think about what your expectations are and whether or not they are realistic and I encourage you to question if they are REALLY that important. Is it that important to make them be in the picture? This journey is different, it isn’t bad, it’s just different, and accepting life as it is right now in this moment is the best thing that you can do for your child or your children and for you.

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Not Your Average Autism Mom – Details, episodes & analysis

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Not Your Average Autism Mom – Details, episodes & analysis

Podcast details

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