Married After Kids – Details, episodes & analysis

There’s one tool that shows your spouse you care about how they feel, helps rebuild trust, and creates the kind of emotional safety every strong relationship needs. And yet, it’s one of the most misunderstood (and misused) tools in marriage.

I’m talking about apology. Not the kind that shuts a conversation down or smooths things over quickly, but the kind that actually brings you closer. Whether you're someone who avoids saying sorry, finds yourself over-apologizing, or just wishes your spouse would do it better, I’m getting into why this skill is so critical for connection and how to use it well.

Tune in to discover:

• The surprising psychological reasons so many people struggle to apologize
• Why your spouse’s apology might not feel satisfying (and what to do about it)
• What research says about the way men and women apologize differently
• A 3-part formula you can use to give powerful, effective apologies
• How to get more of what you need even if your partner doesn’t apologize often (or at all)

The Us System: The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system

FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin

Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call: 

https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call

Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids

Sometimes the biggest shift in your marriage starts with getting crystal clear on what you actually need—and saying it out loud.

In this special episode, I’m joined by the incredible Elizabeth Newcamp, military spouse, mom of three, and co-host of Slate’s Care and Feeding podcast, for a real, tender, and honest conversation about resentment, default parenting, emotional labor, and what it means to truly feel seen in your relationship.

We talk about the invisible mental load, how resentment shows up even when you want to be a team, and the surprisingly powerful thing Elizabeth did to shift how she and her husband communicate (it gave me chills).

Tune in to discover:

• Why resentment doesn’t mean your marriage is broken
• The invisible load of emotional labor and how to name it clearly
• What happened when Elizabeth wrote her husband the apology she needed to hear
• The surprising power of being explicit about what you need (even when it feels unfair to spell it out)
• Why real change in marriage takes intention, communication, and practice

Connect with Elizabeth:

• Care and Feeding Podcast: https://slate.com/podcasts/care-and-feeding

Connect with Lindsay:

• FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin

• Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call: 

https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call

• Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids

Do you sometimes feel like, even after years of marriage, your partner still doesn’t know how to love you in the way you truly need? In this episode, I’m opening up about a pivotal shift in my own relationship—one that completely changed the way I felt seen, loved, and supported in my marriage.

If you’ve ever found yourself wishing your partner could understand your needs without you having to constantly explain them, or if you’ve felt the slow burn of resentment building, this episode will speak directly to your heart.

Tune in to discover:

• Why feeling unloved doesn't mean your marriage is broken
• What needed to shift in me before I could ever expect change in him
• The quiet ways resentment builds (and how I stopped it)
• How I helped my spouse understand the kind of love I actually needed
• What changed when I stopped dropping hints and started being clear

Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call: 

https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call

Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin

Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids

Do you know why I typically sign off with “I hope you are taking care of yourself” at the end of each episode? Well, it’s not just a well-meaning gesture, but a powerful not-so-secret secret that holds the key for all military spouses - especially during those challenging times of separation.

Taking care of yourself is hard to do in the best of times, and deployment makes it that much more difficult because you're juggling not only your own responsibilities but also those of your spouse. But here’s the truth: Neglecting self care can have serious repercussions on both your health and your marriage.

In this episode, we uncover what it really means to take care of yourself, even when it feels like you have zero time or energy left in your day. But if you truly want to increase your happiness, strengthen your relationship with your spouse, and improve deployments, THIS is the way. 

Tune in to this powerful episode as we explore:

• Five signs that you are on your way to burnout (and how burnout can impact your health and marriage)

• The pivotal role of self care in fueling your ability to manage your daily demands and responsibilities

• Discovering what self care is (and how to incorporate it even with limited time and capacity)

• Why relying on your spouse for the same support during deployments may lead to disappointment and arguments

• How taking charge of your own happiness can lead to a stronger, happier you and a healthier, more resilient marriage

For more support during deployment, check out In The Trenches: Mastering Deployment for a Stronger Marriage: https://lindsaycavanagh.com/in-the-trenches

Connect with me for a FREE Military Marriage Breakthrough Call:  https://marriedtomilitary.satoriapp.com/offers/236651-military-marriage-breakthrough-call

Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! https://www.instagram.com/marriedtomilitary/

Continue the conversation in my private Facebook group Married to Military: https://www.facebook.com/groups/449431269700869

In this episode, we’re diving deep into the often-overlooked phase known as the fourth trimester - the postpartum period.

In this eye-opening conversation, Dr. Kristal Lau, a physician, postpartum wellness consultant, and author of Postpartum 30, shares personal stories from her own postpartum, sheds light on why this time can be uniquely challenging for military families, and educates us on the unmatched expectations couples often have when entering this significant phase. 

Tune in to discover how the postpartum period impacts mothers and their marriages, whether you have children, are planning to have them, or simply wish to better support and understand mothers during this transformative time.

We’re exploring:

• What you need to know about the postpartum period (and what “normal” and “abnormal” things to expect)
• Real talk on postpartum depression
• The fascinating changes that occur in a mother's brain during this phase
• One powerful way to decrease resentment in your marriage after having kids
• What most people don’t talk about when it comes to the postpartum period
• Preparing and planning for your postpartum period 

More resources for the postpartum period:

• 3 Essential Postpartum Changes That No One Really Talks About And What To Do About Them: www.mamaswingwoman.com/pplist1
• Dad University: https://www.daduniversity.com/
• Military Birth Resource Network & Postpartum Coalition: https://www.militarybirthresourcenetwork.org/
• Postpartum Wellness Consultant and Owner of Mama's Wing Woman
• Author of Postpartum 30
• Host of 'The Postpartum Wellness Show' on YouTube and Podcasts

For more support during deployment, check out my new course, In The Trenches: Mastering Deployment for a Stronger Marriage: https://lindsaycavanagh.com/in-the-trenches

Connect with me for a FREE Military Marriage Breakthrough Call:  https://marriedtomilitary.satoriapp.com/offers/236651-military-marriage-breakthrough-call

Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! https://www.instagram.com/marriedtomilitary/

Continue the conversation in my private Facebook group Married to Military: https://www.facebook.com/groups/449431269700869

Good news! You can raise incredible kids AND nurture a strong marriage within this extraordinary world of military life. However, let's be real - challenges are part of the package, too. But fear not, because this episode will empower you with strategies and insights to conquer those challenges and create a fulfilling military marriage as parents.

Discover how the joys and demands of parenting impact your relationship, uncover effective strategies for navigating deployments with children, and dive into a conversation on managing different parenting styles. 

We are also exploring:

• The impact of having children on your marriage and the challenges it presents

• Essential daily actions and tools to enhance your role as a spouse and parent

• Maintaining effective relationships without spending excessive time

• Nurturing your connection with your spouse amidst the demands of parenthood

• Prioritizing your marriage and finding time for each other, even when your schedule is packed

In The Trenches: Mastering Deployment for a Stronger Marriage course: https://lindsaycavanagh.com/in-the-trenches

Connect with me for a FREE Military Marriage Breakthrough Call:  https://marriedtomilitary.satoriapp.com/offers/236651-military-marriage-breakthrough-call

Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! https://www.instagram.com/marriedtomilitary/

Continue the conversation in my private Facebook group Married to Military: https://www.facebook.com/groups/449431269700869

Marriage is hard. Add in military life and children, and we get an “extra, extra” marriage. 

Join Elizabeth Newcamp and me as we dive into the complexities of military marriage, parenting challenges, and the unique hardships that arise in military life. Elizabeth shares invaluable insights on navigating disagreements, deployments, and difficult situations as a military spouse, offering practical ideas to foster a stronger marriage and family.

We’re exploring:

• Managing different parenting styles in a military family

• A solid framework for resolving disagreements in marriage

• Establishing guidelines for emotionally charged situations

• The transition period when your military spouse returns home

• One surprising way to help strengthen your military marriage

• How to have a successful marriage despite differences

Connect with Elizabeth:

• Mom and Dad are Fighting podcast: https://slate.com/podcasts/mom-and-dad-are-fighting

• Dutch Dutch Goose family travel blog: https://www.dutchdutchgoose.com/

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ejdn/

For more support during deployment, check out In The Trenches: Mastering Deployment for a Stronger Marriage: https://lindsaycavanagh.com/in-the-trenches

Connect with me for a FREE Military Marriage Breakthrough Call:  https://marriedtomilitary.satoriapp.com/offers/236651-military-marriage-breakthrough-call

Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! https://www.instagram.com/marriedtomilitary/

Continue the conversation in my private Facebook group Married to Military: https://www.facebook.com/groups/449431269700869

Finding friends can be one of the most challenging aspects of military life. And yet it’s also the key to unlock more happiness, especially when your spouse is away.

It’s no secret that friendships are important. They make our lives more enjoyable and also help carry us through difficult times. So when you experience friendship drama, backstabbing, or anything that just doesn't feel good, you may find it extremely hard to build new friendships and avoid letting people get to know you.

In this episode, we’re exploring:

• Why it’s vital to have friendships, especially with other military spouses

• What you can do to feel empowered instead of anxious in difficult friendships

• How to manage your own emotions and mood in toxic situations

• The #1 way to navigate all spouse drama

• Tips to deal with cliques (and who to seek out to build new friendships)

FREE CHALLENGE! How to get through deployment without dread, resentment or fights: https://lindsaycavanagh.com/july-2023-challenge

Check out my course, In The Trenches: Mastering Deployment for a Stronger Marriage: https://lindsaycavanagh.com/in-the-trenches

Connect with me for a FREE Military Marriage Breakthrough Call:  https://marriedtomilitary.satoriapp.com/offers/236651-military-marriage-breakthrough-call

Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! https://www.instagram.com/marriedtomilitary/

Continue the conversation in my private Facebook group Married to Military: https://www.facebook.com/groups/449431269700869

Not to get too therapist-y on you here, BUT your past can have a significant impact on your marriage (and your self). 

The unique moments and roles you experienced in your childhood are still influencing your marriage today. However, you're not stuck playing the same roles forever. You get to decide if the roles are still serving you and if you want to continue them or not. 

Let's dive into the nitty-gritty of how exploring your past can shed light on your current relationship dynamics and help you understand your partner on a whole new level.

In this episode, get ready for:

• Unveiling how your past influences your current relationship patterns and triggers

• Empowering yourself to shift (or embrace!) the role you play in your marriage

• Juicy real-life examples and stories from my clients and my own marriage

• The #1 golden nugget to remember when digging into your past 

• One key question that can help improve your relationship with your spouse

• Plus, a little secret sauce to strengthen your marriage as you explore your past

More resources to strengthen your marriage:

In The Trenches: Mastering Deployment for a Stronger Marriage: https://lindsaycavanagh.com/in-the-trenches

Connect with me for a FREE Military Marriage Breakthrough Call:  https://marriedtomilitary.satoriapp.com/offers/236651-military-marriage-breakthrough-call

Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! https://www.instagram.com/marriedtomilitary/

Continue the conversation in my private Facebook group Married to Military: https://www.facebook.com/groups/449431269700869

Are you craving better communication during your spouse's deployment or TDY? 

I'm breaking down the biggest mistakes people make when it comes to deployment communication, and providing actionable tips to improve communication that allow you to connect deeper with your spouse, even across different time zones and limited availability.

Deployments and TDYs bring unique communication challenges, but with the right mindset and strategies, you can maintain a healthy and meaningful connection with your partner. 

So don't just accept that deployment communication will not be great while they’re away. Join me in this episode as we explore:

• Four practical ways to improve communication during deployment

• How you can get what you need most when your spouse is away

• Ways to approach the conversation when there is something pressing you need answered or you have something bothering you

• An effective tool you can use anytime to improve communication

• How your mindset plays a crucial role in all of this

FREE CHALLENGE! How to get through deployment without dread, resentment or fights: https://lindsaycavanagh.com/july-2023-challenge

Check out my course for more support during deployment! In The Trenches: Mastering Deployment for a Stronger Marriage: https://lindsaycavanagh.com/in-the-trenches

Connect with me for a FREE Military Marriage Breakthrough Call:  https://marriedtomilitary.satoriapp.com/offers/236651-military-marriage-breakthrough-call

Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! https://www.instagram.com/marriedtomilitary/

Continue the conversation in my private Facebook group Married to Military: https://www.facebook.com/groups/449431269700869