LOVERS by shan – Details, episodes & analysis

In this episode of Lovers, I’m joined by my husband Jared Brady to tell the story of the exact day we decided to call our relationship an open relationship.

Want to take the Relationship Style quiz I mentioned in the episode? Click HERE
https://www.loversbyshan.com/quizzes

In this episode, Shan Boodram and Jared Brady share intimate details from the early days of their relationship that led to them choosing to label their love as an open relationship.

If your first reaction to “open relationship” is “so… cheating?” you’re not alone, and this conversation is also for you.

Cheating isn’t about a specific behavior, it’s about breaking the rules of the relationship you agreed to play by, which is why it’s important to clearly define YOUR rules together. 

This episode explores why people seek structured relationships even without exclusivity, what commitment actually looks like when it isn’t defined by romantic restriction, and how accountability, emotional safety, partnership, and love can exist outside traditional scripts.

This isn’t an episode about convincing anyone to open their relationship. It’s about clarity, consent, and understanding why the rules matter more than the label.

MasterClass
Have you taken my MasterClass yet? New subscribers get access to my class and hundreds of others starting at $10 per month. Right now, our listeners get an additional 15% off any MasterClass annual membership at masterclass.com/lovers.

Follow Jared
Instagram → https://www.instagram.com/enjoyjaredbrady
YouTube → https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKVWwEy39GLNzKXXt9v46TA

Want more Lover?
Receive the weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletter
Join the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/community
Explore quizzes and worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Conflict is inevitable in long-term relationships. Damage doesn’t have to be.

In this episode, we explore what actually separates fights that bring couples closer from fights that quietly turn lovers into enemies. We talk about the moment arguments go sideways, why so many conflicts feel bigger than the issue at hand, and how couples can stay on the same team even when they fundamentally disagree.

Our guest, Touré Neblett, draws on decades of navigating high-stakes, contentious conversations both publicly and privately to share what he’s learned about emotional regulation, repair, and conflict inside a long-term marriage. This conversation focuses on how disagreement can exist without contempt, and how learning to fight differently can fundamentally change the trajectory of a relationship.

Follow Touré
Website → https://toure.com Toure
Instagram → https://www.instagram.com/toureshow/ Instagram
YouTube → https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCo-SwvkGbQgDt3oXfASPPJQ youtube.com
Podcast → Touré Show (Apple/Spotify)
Books → Who’s Afraid of Post-Blackness? What It Means to Be Black Now; I Would Die 4 U: Why Prince Became an Icon; Soul City; Never Drank the Kool-Aid; The Portable Promised Land; Nothing Compares 2 U (available on Amazon and major booksellers)

Want more Lover?
Shan’s AI trained to give you her advice → http://loversbyshan.com
Receive the weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletter
Join the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/community
Explore quizzes and worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Trigger Warning: This conversation includes a deeply personal story shared by André Holland, including a moment when someone he had affections for used a racial slur toward him. Listener discretion is advised.

What happens when a core memory rewrites the story of how we see ourselves in love? In this week’s LOVERS episode, Shan sits down with actor André Holland to explore the pivotal memory that shaped his belief that he was never “good enough” as himself—and that he had to become someone “better” to be loved.

They unpack how these deeply rooted emotional imprints steer our relationships—sometimes helping us, but often holding us back. André’s story reveals how early wounds can guide not just who we choose, but how we let love in.

Whether you’re single, partnered, or somewhere in between, this episode is a powerful guide to:

• uncovering the underlying stories behind your intimacy
• rewriting beliefs that no longer serve you
• opening the door to deeper, more authentic connection
  
  

🎬 About Love, Brooklyn
Want more from André Holland? Be sure to check out his new film, Love, Brooklyn now playing in theaters. It will be available for streaming too!  

Stay up-to-date and follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lovebrooklynmovie/

For more on André be sure to follow him on Instagram: http://instagram.com/andreholland

Want more Lover?
Shan’s AI trained to give you her advice → http://loversbyshan.com
Get a free weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletter
Join the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/community
Explore free quizzes + worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When was the last time your significant other gave you an ultimatum? When was the last time you gave them an ultimatum?

In this episode, Shan sits down with Comedian, Actor, and Filmmaker, David So. He breaks down what led him to this breaking point and ultimately how this ultimatum impacted their relationship.... for better or worse?

Thanks to the sponsor of this episode ZocDoc. ZocDoc is a FREE app that shows you doctors who are patient-reviewed, take your insurance and are available when you need them.

With ZocDoc, you can see real, verified patient reviews to help you find the right doctor in your network and your neighborhood.

Go to http://Zocdoc.com/com/Lovers to try it out for yourself!

It is as easy as search, find and book an appointment, in person or remotely, that works for your schedule. Again, go to http://Zocdoc.com/com/Lovers to try it out for yourself!

Thanks to the sponsor of this episode, Apostrophe. Post pregnancy, my melasma was a real struggle. A few weeks ago it was visible in the middle of my forehead, above my eyebrows and my fav, above my lip but last week my MUA was getting me ready, he actually said the melasma was fading. Thanks to the Apostrophe team, I  found a safe treatment for me plus a sunscreen for prevention. It came in a cute box with easy instructions and bonus, some funky stickers. Try it out!

http://Apostrophe.com/Lovers

First visit for only $5.00 at http://Apostrophe.com/Lovers

Follow Shan on Instagram: 

www.instagram.com/shanboody
https://www.youtube.com/c/shannontboodram
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSE2Lr9RfYXiFtiX1jk5qng

Follow David: 
https://www.instagram.com/davidsocomedy/?hl=en
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCt8OnQ7ztuLrPrehlj8ZuuQ

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

How many times have you romanticized your life and where you THOUGHT you’d be by a certain age. For many of us, by 30 we imagine ourselves to be wifed up and thriving in a career. 

In this episode, I sit down with Kamie Crawford, the host of MTV’s Catfish and former Miss Teen USA. Kamie is also the host of her very own Podcast called Relationshit. Kamie is the epitome of 30, flirty and thriving! 

Last time Kamie was on the podcast, we broke down the lows and hell nos that led to her breakup and now, we are breaking down what she is leaving behind in her 20s and what she is welcoming in her 30s, including... a new love. 
Thanks to the sponsors of this episode Better Help! For 10% off go to http://betterhelp.com/lovers 
Thanks to the sponsors of this episode Gerber Life Guaranteed. 
Just answer 4 easy questions to get your free personalized quote instantly, by visiting http://GerberLifeFamily.com 


Follow Shan 
http://instagram.com/shanboody
http://tiktok.com/shanboody
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSE2Lr9RfYXiFtiX1jk5qng
loversfriendspodcast@gmail.com

Follow Kamie 
http://instagram.com/kamiecrawford
http://instagram.com/relationshit

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Does sex HAVE to get less passionate as time goes on in a relationship? Is it possible to keep that “can’t keep your hands off each other” feeling in a marriage? In this episode we explore these questions and share the depressing/ hopeful truth about the secret to good sex in a long relationship. 


DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN ALSO WATCH FULL EPISODES OF LOVERS AND FRIENDS? CLICK HERE TO SEE OUR YOUTUBE CHANNEL https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSE2Lr9RfYXiFtiX1jk5qng

Fun fact, falling in love is stressful on the body, but being in love is healthy for the body. When we are falling in love we experience an increase in cortisol, the stress hormone, but studies show that when we develop an attachment to someone oxytocin can actually work to inhibit cortisol production and stress response. That’s why researchers say that true love probably begins when the hormonal cocktail stops working. 

So long story short maybe the loss of passion in our sex life as we know it, is not such a bad thing

Meet the guests of this episode!!!

Kevin Fredericks aka KevOn Stage is an actor, stand-up comedian, entrepreneur, podcast developer and host and filmmaker. Kevin is part of a generation of comedians who gained fame online and has accumulated hundreds of millions of views on social media. He is currently on his 3rd SOLD OUT national comedy tour and he is a New York Times bestselling author with his book Marriage Be Hard that he co-authored with his wife Melissa Fredericks who you might know on the internets as Mrs Kevon Stage.
Melissa hosts The Love Hour podcast and is best known for her betterment campaigns and advocacy for self-love. 
Together, Kevin and Melissa provide a hilarious and fresh master class on what it takes to build and maintain a healthy and lasting relationship.

Follow KevOnStage:
http://instagram.com/kevonstage
http://youtube.com/kevonstage
http://kevonstage.com

Follow Kev’s streaming service: 
Kevon Stage Studios

Follow Melissa aka Mrs.KevOnStage
http://instagram.com/mrskevonstage
http://youtube.com/mrskevonstage
https://www.mrskevonstage.com/


Follow Shan 

http://instagram.com/shanboody
http://tiktok.com/shanboody
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSE2Lr9RfYXiFtiX1jk5qng
loversfriendspodcast@gmail.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dating in your 20s is a lot like being given free range with paint as a toddler. Things can be fun but can get messy really quick. But the beauty is, you're young and have time to clean the mess up. In this episode, that is exactly what we are getting into.  

Harry Jowsey and Georgia Hassarati - two on again off again, mid twenties, love birds in the midst of what we just described.

Harry, Georgia and myself all met on the Netflix show that I’ve worked on as a sex expert for several seasons, Too Hot to Handle. Harry was a retreat attendee on season one and Georgia, on season three. They met because Harry asked Georgia to be a guest on his podcast, Tap in with Harry Jowsey.

Harry and Georgia share a lot of the same things in common: background, career aspirations, sense of humor and the desire for real love in their 20s. They start hanging out, yada yada yada, they fall in love, have a few incredible rom-com-esque months together before things got a little TOO real… too heavy for Harry who then decides to call things off. But in classic-twenty-something-style our boy Harry made another big call a few weeks after that.

And that’s where they are today… And if you’re not really clear where that “at” is, don’t worry, neither are they… and that’s kinda the beauty of trying to do the love thing in your twenties…right? 


Thanks to the sponsors of this episode!
ZocDoc

Go to ZocDoc.com/LOVERS to start your search for a top rated doctor today. Many are available within 24 hours. 

That’z ZocDoc.com/LOVERS. 


Gerber Life Family

GerberLifeFamily.com

Just answer 4 easy questions to get your free personalized quote instantly, by visiting GerberLifeFamily.com

Follow Shan 

http://instagram.com/shanboody
http://tiktok.com/shanboody
http://shanboodram.com
loversfriendspodcast@gmail.com


Follow Harry- @HarryJowsey

http://instagram.com/harryjowsey
http://youtube.com/harryjowsey
http://tiktok.com/harryjowsey


Follow Georgia: @GeorgiaHassarati

http://instagram.com/georgiahassarati
http://youtube.com/GeorgiaHassarati1
http://tiktok.comGeorgiaHassarati

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Shan sits down with artist Tanerelle to explore all about sacred sexuality and intimacy. 

Sacred sexuality is an entirely different way to connect with your partner. It involves delicacy, hugs, caresses and even at times no touching while holding space for meditation. 
All this deep work, leads to deep release which can include more powerful orgasms to longer-lasting, non-ejaculatory, and multiple orgasms for men and numerous types of orgasms for women.

Thanks to our sponsor for this episode, Apostrophe!

We have a special deal for our audience: Get your first visit for only five dollars at http://Apostrophe.com/LOVERS when you use our code:LOVERS. That’s a savings of fifteen dollars! This code is only available to our listeners.


 To get started, just go to

http://Apostrophe.com/LOVERSand click Begin Visit,
 then use our code LOVERS at sign up and you’ll get your first visit for only five dollars!

Follow Shan:
https://www.instagram.com/shanboodram
https://www.tiktok.com/@shanboody
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSE2Lr9RfYXiFtiX1jk5qng
loversfriendspodcast@gmail.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sincere Show, best known as Jason Derulo's DJ and a former castmate of Love and Hip Hop, came to this podcast to discuss non-monogamy and why his life of abundance has informed his decision to seek out an open relationship. However, the interview went much deeper and wider covering topics like fear of abandonment, sexual trauma, power dynamics and harmful tropes. 

This episode poses thought starters such as: What does it look like to be healed? Can you know what you want without knowing yourself without the baggage of trauma? How much space should we make for hurt people who hurt people? When are boundaries unhelpful brick walls? Should we prioritize or drive for sex or safety?

Thank you to the sponsor of this episode HelloFresh


Go to http://HelloFresh.com/lovers65 and use code lovers65 for 65% off plus free shipping!

Follow Shan 


http://instagram.com/shanboody
http://tiktok.com/shanboody
http://shanboodram.com
loversfriendspodcast@gmail.com


Follow the guests on this episode 


www.instagram.com/sincereshow
tiktok.com/sincereshow
www.twitter.com/sincereshow

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Shan Boodram delves into the taboo and hot topic that is cheating: are there ways to predict if your partner will cheat? Are there early warning signs?

Recently two huge celebrity cheating scandals broke out- Adam Levine’s alleged affair and Nia Long’s fiancee, Ime Udoka’s affair. Often when we think of someone being cheated on, we cast an archetype - But in this case the people who’ve been cheated on don’t fit the script at all!

On this episode, Shan talks to Estefania Pessoa better know as Tefi on Tiktok, who provided an unexpected take on cheating. Tefi breaks down how  your code shapes your decisions, character, morals and therefore if you're likely going to be a cheater. 

But there was another take on how to spot a cheater, that I found very fascinating. Estefania Pessoa better known as Tefi on TikTok spoke about code. Tefi explained how code is your character, your morals, and how this code will impact the decisions you make. Decisions that will not only affect you, but those that you love. 

Shan also sits down with  Dr. Barry Goldstein, a clinical psychologist who enlightens us on what to look out for to get a leg up on those who can’t keep their legs closed. 


Promo Codes:

Better Help: Visit www.betterhelp.com/Lovers today to get 10% off your first month.

Apostrophe: Visit Apostrophe.com/Lovers for your first visit for only 5$

Thank you Better Help and Apostrophe for sponsoring this episode. 


Follow Shan: 
http://instagram.com/shanboody
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSE2Lr9RfYXiFtiX1jk5qng

Call in to the show to leave a voice note
‪(323) 375-4797
loversfriendspodcast@gmail.com

Follow the guests on this episode: 

Tefi 
https://www.tiktok.com/@hellotefi
https://www.instagram.com/hellotefi

Dr. Barry Goldstein 
http://realityshrink.net/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.