Hopestream: Parenting Kids Through Addiction & Mental Health – Details, episodes & analysis

In an unplanned and heartfelt episode, I decided to share some thoughts on the importance of acceptance in the face of life's challenges. I discuss how resisting difficult experiences can hinder personal growth and highlight the beauty of transformation that comes with accepting reality.

You'll also hear a story of a life saved recently by one of our members, made possible by the support of Hopestream's scholarship fund. This episode takes place during our Seeds of Hope Giving Campaign for 2024, which you can learn more about at hopestreamcommunity.org/donate. If the Hopestream podcast has been helpful for you and your family, please consider a donation to our 501(c)3 nonprofit organization to keep it on air and, importantly, ad-free.

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Hopestream’s Seeds of Hope Giving Campaign

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Find us on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:

Transcranial magnetic stimulation (TMS) is a highly effective but obscure treatment in psychiatry. It received its first FDA clearance for the treatment of depression in 2008 but has since proven itself to be effective for a host of other issues – depression, OCD, smoking cessation, bipolar, PTSD, cognitive impairment, and even autism. And a huge bonus? Side effects are practically non-existent.

If that doesn’t get your attention, consider this: The FDA recently cleared TMS for depression in adolescents aged 15 and up, with studies currently being conducted on efficacy for substance use disorders.

In this episode, I speak with Dr. Martha Koo, president of the TMS society's board of directors. Martha received her degrees from Princeton and UCLA and is double-board-certified in psychiatry and addiction. She has also participated in the evolution of TMS for decades. She’ll explain who TMS is for, how it works, what it’s capable of, and why there may be an explosion of its use in the coming years.

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Neuro Wellness Spa
• Your Behavioral Health
• Clear Behavioral Health (Mental Health & Addiction Services)
• TMS Society (find a provider)

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Find us on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:

When Dr. Jarrell Myers took his first job out of grad school, he loved working with children suffering from anxiety disorders, as well as their families. It was a calling he’d already been pursuing for years. But there was a big problem: many kids who needed needed help for their anxiety couldn’t become patients in his program because they were using substances.  

While this made some clinical sense (for reasons Jarell will explain), it also failed to acknowledge that substance use was woven into their anxiety, often as a coping mechanism.  This is what finally led him to the Center for Motivational Change (CMC).

CMC publishes the book I recommend more than any other to parents of kids struggling with substances – Beyond Addiction: How Science and Kindness Help People Change. Today I finally have a chance to speak with Dr. Myers about some of the core principles it contains.

In this episode, we discuss the nature of anxiety, why it makes sense that anxious kids to turn to substances, how parenting those kids may trigger our own fear and anxiety responses, and how to give our families the best fighting chance in the face of these realities.

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Center for Motivation and Change
• Beyond Addiction: How Science and Kindness Help People Change
• Beyond Addiction Workbook for Friends and Family

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Find us on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
In this episode with my right-hand woman, business partner, and all-around inspiring mom Cathy Cioth, we dive into the harsh reality that life with a child who's experimenting with or actively addicted to substances doesn't look like the pictures we had in mind when they were little.

As parents, we do a disservice to our kids when we intentionally or subconsciously layer expectations on them around who they should be, how they should be, what they should accomplish, and what we think they should want. We might project onto them things we experienced in our own family growing up, and Cathy and I dig into why it's sometimes easier to focus on our kids than on ourselves.

We share personal experiences from our family's journeys and, of course, go on a tangent or two along the way. We address the very real grief that comes with life looking far different than we'd anticipated and share insightful solutions for navigating it all.

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Episode 130: Nine things we never talk about when our kids misuse drugs or alcohol 

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Find us on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
With well over a hundred episodes on Hopestream, I couldn’t believe we haven’t talked about the very common link between substance use and suicide rates. Since it was time, I’m honored to introduce you to mother, author, and mental health advocate, Anne Moss Rogers. She courageously shares her story of the loss of her son to suicide in hopes of spurring more honest conversations before it’s too late for other families. 

While this is another topic that’s messy and difficult to navigate, Anne Moss reminds us that patience and curiosity are the best tools we have for exposing the root of our kids’ pain. You’ll also hear practical ways to recognize signs that your child needs to talk about suicide and ways to work through what can be an overwhelming fear.

In this episode, you’ll learn: 

• Why Anne Moss left a corporate career she was highly passionate about to pursue advocacy for suicide prevention full time
• Whether talking about suicide plants seeds in a person’s mind about killing themselves
• How her son Charles' battle with mental health showed up in the beginning and how it progressed
• The connection between self-harming behavior and suicide ideation
• How Anne Moss had to navigate her son’s immediate relapse after going to treatment
• The red flags to look for if someone you love is contemplating suicide
• What you can do if your son or daughter avoids engaging this topic with you

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Anne Moss Rodgers:
  • The Emotionally Naked Speaker
  • NAMI Virginia Board Member
  • Blog: EmotionallyNaked.com
  • Speaker Site: AnneMossRogers.com, My 6-minute TEDx
  • Diary of a Broken Mind: A Mother's Story, A Son's Suicide and the Haunting Lyrics He Left Behind (book)
  • Emotionally Naked. A Teacher’s Guide to Preventing Suicide and Recognizing Students at Risk (book)
• Free Tools: Free Self-Harm Safety Box
• Crisis Text Line: 741-741
• Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: 988
• Suicide Prevention: Website

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Find us on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
Today I dive into a key component of encouraging more positive behavior through the use of consequences.  You probably already know consequences can be confusing and hard to get right when your child is misusing substances and struggles with mental health issues. They're sometimes hard to be consistent with, and often backfire.

Chapter 11 in the book Beyond Addiction is the base for the information shared in this episode and outlines four ways you can go about using consequences with your son or daughter - however, only three are recommended. 

It's a snack-sized lesson on a really confusing topic, so lace up for a quick walk or hop in the car and listen in to get some practical strategies you can start using today. 

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Australian Dollar and British Pound payment accepted for membership: The Stream
• Dina Cannizzaro on Hopestream episode 138

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Find us on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
Friday, Saturday, Sunday. If you’re a parent of a child misusing drugs or alcohol, you know why these three days can send you into a tailspin. The free time and lack of structure mean our kids will likely find themselves in risky situations. In this coaching episode, I met with Marie- a Stream Member who booked this last-minute session with me on a Friday, which told me something was brewing. 

Marie has a son who has experienced trauma and struggled with substances and has been attending a therapeutic boarding school. Yet, for many reasons, it wasn’t an ideal fit. Now he’s back at home, doing online school, and not in treatment, but 17 days sober. The bright spot in this story is that this mom and son are close, have good communication, and he’s expressed that he wants to stay sober. Listen as we explore how Marie can initiate some hard conversations to reduce her anxiety and increase the chance of her son choosing support and sobriety over the weekend. 

In this episode, you’ll learn: 

• How previous trauma can complicate recovery unexpectedly
• Why we have to consistently affirm our kids even when we don’t love their behavior 
• How Marie is helping her son assess the risk factors associated with different friends and social scenarios
• Why our kids need to know that we’re also learning and not confident, either
• What Marie is learning about the impact of choosing self-care on this path

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Hopestream podcast episode using "SURF" communication skills: www.brendazane.com/hopestream/73

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Find us on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
It’s tough to come to terms with how little control we have over whether our kids choose substances or healing and recovery. In this episode, you’ll get to hear from Dina Cannizzaro. She’s a mom who has been through hell and back but has channeled all that fear and anxiety into actionable steps toward relearning how to connect with her son and harness the surprising power of self-care.

Hear how far she and her son Parker have come now that he’s been in active recovery for six years. You’ll also hear how she had to repair relationships she let suffer (including her other children) as she became all-consumed in her fear and efforts to support her son.

You’ll be thrilled to know she will also be your guide through the Beyond Addiction Study Group, so be sure to sign up for that ASAP, as it starts November 7!

In this episode, you’ll learn: 

• Why Dina chose to push through her crippling fear of rock climbing
• How she invested in the relationship with her son even when he wasn’t ready to be in contact
• What anticipatory grief is and how it showed up in Dina’s life
• What helped Dina realize she was just as sick as Parker but without the influence of substances
• Why she won’t stop sharing her story with anyone who will listen

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Find us on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
It is an incredibly exciting week as we get to announce the opening of The Woods, our men’s community for those who identify as dads parenting teens who are struggling with substance misuse. I am honored to introduce you to Bill Guy, who is leading this new tribe of courageous men. He’s been in your shoes, and he tragically lost a son to an overdose. Bill discovered resources like CRAFT through the book Beyond Addiction and was blown away by the way it changed his relationship with his son, even in his last days. 

While Bill continues to grieve the loss of his son, he has found an incredible sense of purpose empowering other parents to connect with their kids and help motivate them toward healthy change. Join us to hear his story which includes both heartbreak and healing and why he’s thrilled to host and support this private community for dads.

In this episode, you’ll learn: 

• Why motivation trumps manipulation when parents are trying to get their kids to accept help for substance misuse
• How Bill describes the confusion and disappointment he felt watching his son struggle
• The physical and emotional signs that inspired Bill to take his own health seriously
• How Bill was able to stop blaming and controlling his son and have a relationship with him regardless of his drug use
• Why men need other men in a safe community like The Woods

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• The Woods Community Founding Memberships
• The Partnership To End Addiction 
• Man’s Search For Meaning by Viktor Frankl

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Find us on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
Bribing. Shaming. Forcing. Manipulating. Yelling. These are just some of the approaches I tried while parenting my son who was struggling with a high-risk lifestyle and substance use. You likely have too. It took me a long time to accept that none of that was working. 

But through the book Beyond Addiction, the CRAFT approach, and specifically The Invitation to Change, I discovered our kids’ behaviors make sense and substances work really well - until they don’t. This understanding shifted everything and I haven’t stopped talking about it since. I had one of the Beyond Addiction authors, Carrie Wilkens, Ph.D. on early in the podcast and I’ve invited her back to catch up post-pandemic and learn about a new companion workbook that’s just come out for parents. 

Join us for this inspiring conversation as we unpack common stigmas around addiction, understand why using CRAFT and The Invitation To Change approach is not condoning substance use, and why staying curious and building connection is the key to motivating your child to make positive changes. I had a few lightbulb moments myself talking with Carrie and hearing her compassionate and practical approach to helping people change.

In this episode, you’ll learn: 

• Why compassion is crucial for navigating a post-pandemic world
• How to respond when your child is ambivalent about substance use
• Why self-awareness and self-compassion work comes first for parents
• How to get a hesitant spouse, partner, or co-parent on board with CRAFT
• That fear will be a consistent companion on this journey, but it doesn’t have to own you

EPISODE RESOURCES:

• Beyond Addiction Book
• Beyond Addiction Workbook for Families and Friends
• The Center for Motivation and Change (CMC:FFC)
• CMC Treatment Program

This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Find us on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.