Dates & Mates with Damona Hoffman – Details, episodes & analysis

Brenden Durell, intimacy expert on Netflix's Too Hot To Handle, guides us towards a deeper connection within with exercises that he practiced on the show and inspired by his intimacy retreat. Our Dear Damona question this week is: I find myself falling for men who either go all in or don’t give me the time of day. How can I change my pattern? Follow Brenden on Instagram @BrendenDurell and be sure to check out his work at BrendenDurell.com Look out for his “Inspired Intimacy Challenge” on socials and the Intimacy in the Jungle retreat in October. And, we are enrolling NOW for Damona’s signature group coaching program, The Dates & Mates Method! If you’re ready to create a dating plan and date differently this fall, then this is the time to sign up. Don’t miss out on a limited number of spots in this annual program. Learn more at DamonaHoffman.com/method TIMESTAMPS Introduction to Intimacy (00:00:00) Mirror Work Begins (00:00:09) Understanding Intimacy (00:00:13) Brendan's Background (00:02:05) Location and Energy (00:02:41) Premise of "Too Hot to Handle" (00:04:19) Evolution of Brendan's Role (00:06:00) Mirror Exercise Explanation (00:08:05) Impact of Reality TV (00:10:07) Apologizing to Oneself (00:11:23) Historical Context of Mirrors (00:12:23) Power of Self-Forgiveness (00:14:26) Intimacy Retreats (00:16:49) The Connection with Mother Earth (00:18:00) City Slicker vs. Nature (00:18:18) Walking Through Discomfort (00:19:17) Presence in the Moment (00:20:22) Reframing Time Pressure (00:24:51) Rites of Passage Experience (00:26:08) Intimacy in the Jungle Retreat (00:28:46) Embracing the Unknown (00:30:09) Renegotiating Commitments (00:32:35) God Exists in Everything (00:34:00) Exploring Intimacy Across Cultures (00:34:46) Curiosity in Personal Growth (00:35:52) Demystifying Intimacy (00:36:40) Reframing Perspectives on Pleasure (00:36:51) Listener's Dating Struggles (00:38:49) Prioritizing Self-Love (00:40:02) Understanding Relationship Patterns (00:41:08) Setting Boundaries in Dating (00:42:39) The Importance of Inner Intimacy (00:45:26) Invitation to Join the Program (00:46:32) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jeff Guenther, AKA TherapyJeff on Instagram, joins Damona in the premiere of Season 12 of Dates & Mates for a state of the date address! They cover all phases of the dating journey from clarifying what you’re seeking to first dates, defining the relationship and even planning for the dreaded breakup. The Dear Damona question this week is: What’s the best way to reach out to someone new on LinkedIn? Be sure to follow Jeff on Instagram @TherapyJeff and grab a copy of his new book, Big Dating Energy, on shelves now! And get Damona’s bestselling book “F the Fairy Tale” in ebook, audiobook, and hardcover everywhere books are sold (FtheFairyTaleBook.com) This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month. TIMESTAMPS Introduction to Season 12 (00:00:00) Overview of the Episode (00:02:06) Introducing Therapy Jeff (00:04:29) Jeff's Book Release (00:05:00) Collaborating with an Ex (00:06:47) Personal Insights in the Book (00:08:48) Clarifying Deal Breakers (00:12:04) Understanding Relationship Needs (00:15:18) The Role of Fears in Dating (00:18:31) Dating Apps Discussion (00:20:07) The Impact of Dating Apps on Love (23:20) The Shift in Dating Dynamics (23:41) Boundaries with Technology (24:27) The Need for Healthy Relationships (27:48) Imagining Ideal Dating Apps (28:16) Cultural Changes in Dating Apps (29:39) Tips for Long-term Relationship Survival (30:19) Navigating Conflict in Relationships (31:59) Communication After Intimacy (33:10) Creating Sexual Energy (35:24) Understanding Breakups (36:45) Ethical Breakup Practices (39:05) The Value of Planning in Relationships (41:38) The Intimacy of Breakup Conversations (43:09) Listener Question on LinkedIn Outreach (44:02) Introduction and Connector Circle (00:46:04) Sliding into DMs (00:46:59) Approaching on LinkedIn (00:48:11) Navigating Online Connections (00:49:19) Promoting the Dates & Mates Method (00:50:16) Call for Listener Questions (00:51:13) Wrap-Up and Guest Teaser (00:52:06) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Inessa Freya, international feng shui master and spiritual psychologist, reveals how simple changes in your home can attract new romantic possibilities, improve your current relationships, and bring a sense of harmony and balance that radiates from the inside out. Plus, Damona shares why she credits Inessa for being a part of bringing Mr. Hoffman into her life! But first we have a surprising dating dish to serve up for you: Move over healthcare! Could dating apps be the new benefit? Then our Dear Damona question this week is: Dating Burnout is real!!! How do I remain positive when I am struggling to find my match? Follow Inessa on Instagram @Inessa_Freya and learn more about her work by visiting www.fengshuifromtheheart.com Read the Forbes piece: forbes.com/sites/soulaimagourani/2024/06/04/dating-services-as-a-future-company-perk/?sh=5df2e008459a Read the Independent piece: https://sg.news.yahoo.com/tokyo-launch-first-government-run-091413507.html Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month. Dates & Mates is sponsored by Betterhelp. TIMESTAMPS TIMESTAMPS (00:00:15) The introduction to Feng Shui (00:02:24) Dating apps as employee benefits  (00:06:20) Government-sponsored dating apps  (00:08:59) Introduction to Inessa Freya (00:10:36) Understanding Feng Shui  (00:12:39) Personal experiences with Feng Shui (00:18:01) Clearing up energy and finding love (00:19:52) Visualizing love and moving for love (00:24:32) Feng Shui principles and applying them (00:26:33) Decluttering and space clearing  (00:33:13) Space Clearing with Intention  (00:33:47) Impact of Objects on Energy  (00:35:14) Moving and Arranging Items  (00:35:55) Feng Shui Rules for Bed Placement  (00:39:38) Ancient Aspects of Feng Shui  (00:42:00) Maintaining a Positive Dating Mindset  (00:47:35) Challenging Societal Narratives  (00:48:42) Attracting Someone  (00:49:52) Mindset and Clarity  (00:50:50) The Five Dating Loops  (00:51:57) Setting Intentions  (00:53:03) Upcoming Season Finale  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Lily Womble, host of the Date Brazen podcast, shares insights from her new book, “Thank You, More Please” so that you can navigate the dating world with eyes wide open and a little main character energy. Plus, she will share how to know when it's time for a dating detox.  The Dating Dish story this week is based on new findings from Tinder: The Green Flags Study on Assumptions & Dating Then our Dear Damona question this week is: How fast is too fast when dating a new match? Follow Lily on Instagram @DateBrazen and be sure to grab a copy of her new book, “Thank You, More Please”. Read the Tinder study by visiting: tinderpressroom.com/The-Green-Flags-Study#assets_all Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month. Dates & Mates is sponsored by Betterhelp. TIMESTAMPS (00:00:00) Intro (00:01:38) Tinder's "Green Flag Study" on assumptions in dating  (00:05:47) Challenges in modern dating  (00:07:00) Creating positive dating experiences  (00:14:57) Criticism of dating apps  (00:17:24) The challenges of modern dating  (00:18:36) Design of dating apps  (00:19:01) Impact of dating apps on users  (00:21:23) Dependency on dating apps  (00:22:22) Main character energy in dating  (00:25:57) The practice of dating skills  (00:30:15) Challenging societal messaging  (00:29:11) Bragging on a date  (00:34:22) Brazen Bragging  (00:38:08) Essence Based Preferences  (00:42:18) Dating Detox: When and Why  (00:48:28) Importance of Intentional Dating  (00:49:21) Navigating Relationship Preparation  (00:49:58) Lily Womble's new book, "Thank You More Please"  (00:50:27) Listener Question: Relationship Pace  (00:51:52) The Notion of "Slow Love"  (00:53:06) Balancing New Love and Personal Life  (00:55:21) Cherishing New Love  (00:56:32) Invitation for Questions and Future Episode Preview Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mat Boggs, YouTube dating coach, sets you up for your best first date yet as he covers everything from red flags and conversation topics to knowing how much time to invest in a match. The Dating Dish story this week comes from Mashable: Dating Culture Has Become Selfish. How Do We Fix It? Then our Dear Damona question this week is: An old flame invited me to their big birthday bash in Cabo. Should I go? Follow Mat on Youtube @MatBoggs and check out his MANifest Your Man Program by visiting: https://www.bravethinkinginstitute.com/love-relationships/resources/mym/offer/strategy-session Read the Mashable story at: mashable.com/article/selfish-dating-app-culture Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month. Dates & Mates is sponsored by Betterhelp. TIMESTAMPS (00:00:12) First dates: The gateway to new possibilities  (00:01:57) Dating culture: A selfish era  (00:04:35) The capitalist mindset and dating (00:08:45) Rethinking the approach to dating (00:10:22) Do's and don'ts of first dates (00:17:47) Red Flags in Dating  (00:18:38) Internal Repetitive Energy  (00:19:35) Internal GPS System  (00:21:28) Manipulative Behaviors (00:23:04) Vibration for Long-Lasting Love  (00:24:35) Compatibility of Interests  (00:25:42) Mindset and Deal Breakers  (00:26:37) Mindset for Online Dating  (00:29:50) Intentional Action in Dating (00:30:51) Sharing on First Dates  (00:33:30) Whose hands are you going to put this baby into? (00:35:33)Shifting the conversation  (00:36:33) Mel's authentic approach (00:43:46) Dear Damona - Tracy's dilemma  (00:45:17) Damona's advice to Tracy  (00:49:06) Happy Birthday and Letting Go  (00:50:17) Lily Womble Up Next Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Alexandra Solomon, couples therapist and author, lays a foundational framework to deepen connection and self-understanding in her new book “Love Every Day: 365 Relational Self-Awareness Practices to Help Your Relationship Heal, Grow and Thrive.” In this episode, she will share specific exercises and prompts to get you thinking about love differently. The Dating Dish story this week comes to you from NBC News: Could an AI Dating Concierge fix your dating life? Then our Dear Damona question this week is: Is it a red flag if my match doesn’t ask me questions about myself? LIVE ONLINE EVENT: Damona is hosting a one night only, live workshop talking about how to meet your matches online and off on Tuesday, May 29th. Last chance to enroll in the Dating Decoded workshop at DamonaHoffman.com/workshop Follow Dr. Alexandra on Instagram @Dr.Alexandra.Solomon and grab a copy of her new book, “Love Every Day: 365 Relational Self-Awareness Practices to Help Your Relationship heal, Grow and Thrive” Read the NBC News story at: https://www.nbcnews.com/tech/internet/ai-personas-are-future-dating-bumble-founder-says-many-arent-buying-rcna151738 Get it off your chest, with BetterHelp.Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month. Dates & Mates is sponsored by Betterhelp. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Kara Loewentheil, Master Certified Life Coach, applies an analytical, feminist lens towards understanding our current dating culture and how our old stories may be affecting our decisions in love. The Dating Dish story this week is based on a national study conducted by Whirlpool: Spring Clean Your Dating Profile: A Surprising Social Experiment Uncovers What Singles Prioritize Most  Then our Dear Damona question this week is: How can I get more messages from my matches? LIVE ONLINE EVENT: Damona is hosting a one night only, live workshop talking about how to meet your matches online and off. Sign up for the Dating Decoded workshop at DamonaHoffman.com/workshop Follow Kara on Instagram @KaraLoewentheil and be sure to grab a copy of her new book, “Take Back Your Brain: How A Sexist Society Gets In Your Head and How To Get It Out.” Read about the Whirpool survey at: prnewswire.com/news-releases/spring-clean-your-dating-profile-whirlpool-brand-uncovers-what-singles-prioritize-most-in-a-potential-partner-302077664.html Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Sara Jane Ho, etiquette expert and host of Netflix’s Mind Your Manners, joins to share the definitive etiquette rules for dating, talking, and texting inspired by her new book. The Dating Dish story this week comes from CNN:  Bumble no longer requires women to make the first move!  Then our Dear Damona question this week is: My match and I are traveling farther than normal to meet. Does that mean our date should last longer? ANNOUNCEMENT: For the first time in a long time, Damona and her team are offering 1-on-1 coaching! Apply to become her next success story at DamonaHoffman.com/application Follow Sara Jane on Instagram @SaraJaneHo and be sure to grab a copy of her new book, “Mind Your Manners: How to Be Your Best Self in Any Situation”. Read the CNN article for yourself: cnn.com/2024/04/30/tech/bumble-relaunch-men-make-first-move/index.html Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Scott Lyons, host of The Gently Used Human podcast, talks about his new book, “Addicted to Drama: Healing Dependency on Crisis & Chaos In Yourself & Others”. This week’s Dating Dish is: HuffPost shares the reasons why we try to “fix” our matches…and what you should probably do instead. Then our Dear Damona question this week is: How can I attract more culturally open matches? Follow Scott on Instagram @DrScottLyons and be sure to grab a copy of his book! Share the love: Get your copy of Damona’s book  F the Fairy Tale on Amazon too and leave a review and Damona could shout you out on an upcoming episode! HuffPost article https://www.huffpost.com/entry/taylor-swift-fix-him-relationships_l_662a5511e4b005d7bf0cbef0 TIMESTAMPS (00:01:36) Why do we try to fix people in our relationships? (00:08:09) Introduction of Dr. Scott Lyons (00:13:32) Causes of addiction to drama (00:17:24) Origin of addiction to drama (00:18:09) Ecosystem and Turbulence (00:19:27) Numbness and Seeking Sensation (00:24:02) Addiction to Drama and Dating Apps (00:27:00) Attentional Economy and Social Media (00:33:13) Interrupting Peace and News Consumption (00:35:26) Dating App Activation and Frameworks (00:37:21) Awareness and Reflexive Behavior (00:38:01) Avoidance Tactics (00:38:24) Escaping Chaos (00:39:30) Milestones of Healing (00:42:41) Processing Trauma (00:43:42) Belonging and Identity (00:47:02) Cultural Diversity in Dating Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this all-Dear Damona episode, Damona takes on dating burnout and swipe fatigue by answering your questions, like: Is it a bad sign if my Bumble match is taking more than 3 days to reply? How do I manage expectations with new partners? How do I attract partners that are more financially and emotionally stable?  And, is it more difficult to find love after 50? Share the love: Get your copy of F the Fairy Tale on Amazon today and leave a review and Damona could shout you out on an upcoming episode! TIMESTAMPS 00:00:07 Is it a bad sign if my bumble match is stuck on his move for days? 00:02:19 How do I manage expectations with new partners?  00:17:27 How do I attract partners that are more financially and emotionally stable? 00:18:30 Dealing with fixer-uppers  00:27:50 Is it more difficult to find love after 50? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices