Translating ADHD – Détails, épisodes et analyse

In this episode, Ash and Dusty explore the pervasive challenge of forgetfulness for people with ADHD and how it impacts daily life and progress toward goals. They discuss the common experience of forgetting intentions or tasks, which leads to feelings of being overwhelmed or constantly "putting out fires." Both coaches emphasize the importance of starting with small, manageable systems tailored to individual needs, highlighting that complex systems often fail or get abandoned without curiosity and adjustment. Ash shares his personal approach using a simple three-part system: a calendar for timed events, a Google Doc for catchall to-dos, and a weekly family planner on the refrigerator, illustrating how these tools can work together to improve awareness and consistency.

Dusty expands on this by sharing coaching strategies for clients struggling with forgetfulness, including the value of duplicative systems and the necessity of patience and incremental progress. They use metaphors like building a foundation before erecting a building to help clients understand why coaching requires time and consistent effort. The episode also touches on the importance of accountability, practice, and curiosity in coaching and suggests that listening to resources like this podcast can prepare clients to make the most out of their coaching experience. Ultimately, Ash and Dusty remind listeners that managing forgetfulness in ADHD is an ongoing process that benefits from starting small, learning from experience, and building reliable systems that fit individual lives.

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This week we are delighted to present another special episode dedicated to exploring the lived experiences of people of color with ADHD by presenting an interview with ADHD advocate and influencer Rach Idowu. When Rach’s own diagnosis was disrupted due to the Covid pandemic, she took it upon herself to educate herself about ADHD. When she didn’t find what she was looking for, she started to share her own experience on social media as a black professional woman living in London.

Rach discusses the challenges she faced as a young girl of immigrant parents trying to succeed without knowing she had ADHD. She talks about how she met resistance in the diagnosis process but used her curiosity and tenacity to keep asking questions and not being satisfied with the status quo. She shares with Cam her passion for advocacy and love of gaming and how gaming serves as a model and metaphor for approaching difficult dilemmas. Finally, Rach shares how her love of helping others and spreading the word about ADHD has fueled her enthusiasm and efforts in a very popular newsletter and her own line of ADHD flashcards.

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• Rach’s Twitter
• Rach’s Linktree

• Episode Transcripts: visit TranslatingADHD.com and click on the episode
• Follow us on Twitter: @TranslatingADHD
• Visit the Website: TranslatingADHD.com

Ash and Cam bring the conversation down to earth from last week’s big picture view on journey thinking and detaching from outcome. Chasing big signal items like drama, shiny objects or avoiding conflict has us beholden to the Adrenaline Response Cycle of delay, hyper-focus, crash, recovery. This is often fueled by destination thinking and attaching to outcomes. Both Ash and Cam bring in examples of where clients design their own practices or experiments to limit ARC-fueled behaviors.

Cam talks about how in coaching we look at behaviors that are not working prior to building new behaviors. He shares an example where a client wants to have less of an emotional experience, specifically FOMO or fear of missing out, while he day-trades stocks. Key to the experience are guidelines or rules of engagement and identifying the learning opportunity. The learning opportunity in this experiment is to bring the Keen Observer to his own emotional experience and see what big signal he is attached to. ADHD executive function challenges make it very difficult to let go or release a thought or belief or some picture of an outcome. The client over a period of experiments was able to generate new awareness and pull the learning forward into how he shows up at work, addressing two of the three barriers of ADHD (See below for link). Ash illustrates how a liability like emotional lability can be turned into a strength like empathy or intuition - that they can be two sides of the same coin. The hosts leave listeners with some places to start looking at building experiments of their own.

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• Navigating the Three Barriers of ADHD
• Book: Why Greatness Cannot Be Planned: The Myth of the Objective

Ash and Cam continue to discuss the Adrenaline Response Cycle and ways to create some distance from ARC. The hosts revisit the concept of Journey Thinking - a cornerstone of coaching principles and a common theme on the podcast. Those of us with ADHD are prone to Destination Thinking or a propensity for attaching to specific outcomes.

Both Cam and Ash share their own examples of Journey Thinking and what they did to address it. Ash brings back a popular metaphor of rocks in a foggy pond to illustrate the challenge of next steps and Cam shares how ADHD can exacerbate Destination Thinking.

Part of the attaching to outcome dilemma is that it is often connected to a big signal either positive or negative. Along with that big signal is a limiting story and often intense emotions. The hosts share the practice of catch and release - a way to hold thoughts and feelings less tightly.

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• Episode 9 - Embracing Journey Thinking
• More on ARC from Cam’s Blog
• Adrenaline Response Cycle (image below)

• Episode Transcripts: visit TranslatingADHD.com and click on the episode
• Follow us on Twitter: @TranslatingADHD
• Visit the Website: TranslatingADHD.com

Ash and Cam shift from exploring the phases of the Adrenaline Response Cycle to discussing how to become less beholden to the cycle. The hosts share that this work is central to any ADHD coaching relationship - locating motivators other than urgency and hyperfocus to get things done. Ash and Cam focus on three main discussion points in today’s episode.

• Building awareness around how we can rationalize our avoidant behaviors prolonging the Delay phase.
• Building awareness of how we can hunt for meaning in everything we do and everything we don’t do.
• And starting to shift away from our binary (now/not now) approach to time and urgency.

The hosts also look at how awareness of big signals can help to create important new learning about the ARC process. Cam and Ash share numerous examples of how each individual’s approach to this dilemma is unique to that individual and the significance of owning one's own process here. Ash shares a different take on the “Just do it!” approach, and both hosts discuss the importance of popping the ‘fantasy bubble’ and share the limitations of popular phrases like time blindness. Finally, the hosts talk about how they use concepts like emotion, space and social connections to make time more discernible for both Cam and Ash.

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• More on ARC from Cam’s Blog
• Adrenaline Response Cycle (image below)

• Episode Transcripts: visit TranslatingADHD.com and click on the episode
• Follow us on Twitter: @TranslatingADHD
• Visit the Website: TranslatingADHD.com

Asher and Cam dive deeper into the Adrenaline Response Cycle, exploring the Delay phase that preceeds the Intense Activity phase. Last week they explored the Crash-Recovery phases, so the hosts thought it wise to look at the phase that so many of us with ADHD spend lots of time grappling with. In common circles this is referred to as procrastination, but hosts Cam and Ash prefer to not use this language because it doesn't get to the root of the dilemma. They share several examples of how Delay can play out from doing everything but the urgent task to doing much more than the specific challenge.

Ash reiterates the distinction between constructive and productive  work. Cam shares how our contextual wiring can wreak havoc when fueled by fear and urgency, playing out catastrophic scenarios or taking us to valley moments. Both hosts talk about how pause, disrupt and pivot can be useful during the delay phase and the power of acceptance.

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• More on ARC from Cam’s Blog
• Adrenaline Response Cycle (image below)

• Episode Transcripts: visit TranslatingADHD.com and click on the episode
• Follow us on Twitter: @TranslatingADHD
• Visit the Website: TranslatingADHD.com

Ash and Cam continue to look at the dynamic nature of boundary creation and management by revisiting the very popular Adrenaline Response Cycle from Episode 4. The hosts share how our boundaries naturally adjust as a result of our current mode of activity. For so many of us with ADHD our daily mode is governed by the ARC Model – when we are beholden to the urgency of the current big signal. This urgency elicits an adrenaline and dopamine response that allows us to access our task management network and engage with our work. Ash and Cam actually focus more on the periods of the cycle other than the intense activity period, when we are enjoying a state of hyper-focus.

Asher shares how he has learned to develop healthy boundaries around his own recovery periods, distinguishing healthy recovery time from post-crash recovery time. We often put so much focus on production and hyper-focus , we don’t realize the cost of a prolonged crash/recovery sequence. Ash reshares his Hoth rebel base metaphor for recovery periods he had little agency over. Finally, Ash shares a personal example of how he actively managed boundaries around a big signal that in the past would have had him jettison all other obligations and commitments and would result in a big crash and long recovery. He discusses effectively communicating needs, clarifying ‘the ask’ and managing expectations, all the while seeing himself ‘in the picture’.

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• Rebel Base Hoth Metaphor Episode
• More on ARC from Cam’s Blog
• Adrenaline Response Cycle (image below)

• Episode Transcripts: visit TranslatingADHD.com and click on the episode
• Follow us on Twitter: @TranslatingADHD
• Visit the Website: TranslatingADHD.com

Asher and Cam revisit boundaries after their initial boundary discussion way back in episode 25 almost three years ago. The hosts discuss why it is so hard for those of us with ADHD to establish and maintain boundaries, and they share ways to create boundaries that can work for a brain wired for context.

Ash and Cam bring an inside/out approach to boundary development by asking the listener to think more about what they are defending than what they are defending against. The podcast concept of seeing oneself in the picture can be subjective and difficult to quantify. They introduce the concept of the ‘performative judge’, an inner critic character that focuses on everything related to doing and nothing to do with being. This performance judge along with one down can set us up for difficult boundary management.

Ash shares an example where a client uses metaphor concepts of saving money to illustrate effective time and boundary management. Both hosts discuss the power of perspective, and that pausing to create space can be helpful. Cam talks about creating space between ourselves and that performative judge, and Ash shares another example where the client creates space between the ask and the reply. Lastly the hosts discuss the vulnerable spot we can find ourselves between new awareness and new actions to change and how we can protect ourselves through boundaries.

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• Episode Transcripts: visit TranslatingADHD.com and click on the episode
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Ash and Cam continue to explore the roles and other factors that contribute to the dynamic that can create dysfunction and associated drama in our relationships. Cam distinguishes dysfunctional moments from the more serious dysfunctional people and relationships. If we can pause, disrupt and pivot around these moments, we can lessen the dramatic outcome.

Asher introduces the idea of the executive function tax when confronted with new environmental factors. Cam brings Positive Intelligence, a new tool to the podcast, to explore more roles that can contribute to dysfunction. When we are more aware and more curious of these patterns, we can have agency to alter our outcomes. Cam and Ash explore several examples to illustrate how these saboteurs can play off each other. 

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• https://www.positiveintelligence.com/saboteurs/
• https://www.susandavid.com/

• Episode Transcripts: visit TranslatingADHD.com and click on the episode
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• Visit the Website: TranslatingADHD.com

Co-Hosts Ash and Cam continue to explore relationships and the drama related to them, looking at specific ADHD situations and distinctions. They dig deeper into the Karpman model introduced last week and look at the internal factors that can contribute to external dysfunction and drama.

Those of us with ADHD can focus on getting a need met to the detriment of a larger dysfunction, focused on the immediacy of the need and missing the subtle yet damaging effects of a prolonged dynamic that doesn’t work. Ash and Cam look at the dynamic between victim, prosecutor and rescuer to illustrate this phenomenon. When we start to bring curiosity and nuance, though, to how we show up in our relationships, we can start to create change.

The hosts focus on internal roles and stories we can attach to recognizing that change can only occur when we address our own stuff first. Ash shares different examples of how each Karpman role can show up, including how we can conveniently put the “Neurotypical“ in a prosecutor role. The hosts share specific strategies to start to create awareness, including looking at the energy consumption of playing specific roles and exploring ‘next level emotional work’. Remember to seek professional therapeutic help from an ADHD specific counselor if exploring this topic is too difficult on your own.

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• Our Process: Understand, Own, Translate.
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• Karpman Drama Triangle

• Episode Transcripts: visit TranslatingADHD.com and click on the episode
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• Visit the Website: TranslatingADHD.com