Secondhand Therapy is a funny, honest mental health podcast where two unlicensed best friends unpack their weekly therapy sessions. Join Louie Paoletti and Michael Malone as they explore anxiety, ADHD, grief, masculinity, and emotional growth—with humor, heart, and total transparency. Each episode blends raw self-reflection with real time takes on therapy, trauma, relationships, and the messy process of healing. It’s real talk about mental health in the modern world, and why personal growth is so damn hard.
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Données mises à jour le 18/09/2026
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Psychic Source: Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp: If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
What happens when love, friendship, communication, and expectations all collide?
In this episode of Secondhand Therapy, a tense conversation turns into a deeper look at relationships, emotional triggers, anxiety, resentment, control, communication, and the expectations we place on the people we care about. Sometimes the conflict in front of us isn't the whole story—and sometimes our reactions are shaped by experiences that started long before the current situation.
Lou and Michael explore what it means to feel considered, misunderstood, supported, or judged in a relationship, while unpacking the difference between intentions and impact, spoken and unspoken expectations, and taking responsibility for your own emotions without taking responsibility for someone else's.
It's an honest, uncomfortable, and occasionally very funny conversation about relationship dynamics, boundaries, emotional regulation, family patterns, codependency, personal growth, and trying to communicate better with the people you love.
Psychic Source: Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp: If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
What happens when anxiety turns literally everything into a potential problem?
On this episode of Secondhand Therapy, Michael goes down the rabbit hole of anxiety, control, uncertainty, and the exhausting need to always have a plan. From needing an exit strategy to questioning every possible worst-case scenario, he starts looking at why his brain has such a hard time believing that things will be okay.
Psychic Source: Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp: If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
What if your intuition isn't random—and what if changing your life has less to do with willpower and more to do with paying attention to your patterns?
In this episode of Secondhand Therapy, we sit down with Laura Day to unpack intuition, manifestation, executive dysfunction, personal growth, healing your past self, and the psychology of real change. We explore whether some people are naturally more intuitive, how executive dysfunction may affect the way we process information, and where intuition overlaps with manifestation and intentional living.
Low Stuff and Steam | #143
Épisode 143
lundi 24 août 2026 • Durée 01:04:23
Trigger Warning: This episode contains a discussion including suicide
Psychic Source: Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp: If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
What if your “need for context” is actually just defensiveness in disguise?
This week on Secondhand Therapy, Lou and Michael unpack low self-esteem, codependency, validation, people-pleasing, emotional safety, and the surprisingly complicated art of admitting when you’re wrong. A conversation about why some of us struggle to trust our own opinions, constantly look to other people for reassurance, and feel personally attacked when someone points out a mistake.
Psychic Source: Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp: If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
What happens when the internet sees 90 seconds of your life and decides they know your entire personality?
This week on Secondhand Therapy, Lou and Michael unpack the fallout from a viral clip that sparked a comment-section debate about flirting, relationships, jealousy, safety, and whether Michael crossed a line by giving a woman a drawing. What starts as a conversation about social media judgment turns into something much deeper: the difference between being misunderstood and being wrong, how much weight we should give strangers’ opinions, and why taking accountability for your own emotions matters.
Psychic Source: Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp: If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
What happens when your intentions don't match how other people experience you?
This week on Secondhand Therapy, Michael shares why he switched to a dumb phone, started drawing at his local coffee shop, and accidentally found himself in a debate about whether kindness can be mistaken for flirting. From there, the conversation turns into something much bigger: emotional intention, dating, relationship communication, trust, boundaries, and how differently men and women move through the world.
Psychic Source: Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp: If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
What happens when you finally let yourself be angry?
This week, Michael shares one of his biggest therapy breakthroughs yet after writing a deeply emotional letter to his late mother. What begins as grief quickly turns into conversations about childhood programming, emotional suppression, people pleasing, inherited coping mechanisms, and the uncomfortable realization that we often become the very people who shaped us.
Psychic Source: Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp: If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
What happens when your brain mistakes pain for safety?
This week on Secondhand Therapy, Michael shares one of his biggest therapy breakthroughs yet after a week filled with recovery conversations, codependency meetings, and difficult realizations about love, grief, and self-sabotage.
The guys unpack why fear of abandonment can cause people to sabotage healthy relationships, how childhood attachment wounds shape adult dating patterns, and why some people unconsciously recreate emotional pain because it feels familiar. They also explore love addiction (SLAA), codependency recovery, emotional vulnerability, and the hidden ways grief can prevent happiness.
Psychic Source: Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp: If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
This week on Secondhand Therapy, Louie shares what surprised him most after trying camping for the first time in decades. Away from mirrors, screens, and the constant pace of everyday life, he discovers an unexpected sense of stillness that sparks a much deeper conversation.
From there, Michael opens up about a major breakthrough in therapy around control, anxiety, perfectionism, and the exhausting need to predict every possible outcome. Together, they explore how hypervigilance, codependency, people-pleasing, and childhood survival strategies can turn everyday decisions into overwhelming mental battles—and what it takes to begin letting go.
Psychic Source: Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp: If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
We unpack why rejection hurts even when you don't want what you were rejected from. What begins as a conversation about not being invited to a wedding turns into a deeper exploration of ego, attachment, validation, friendship, and the stories we tell ourselves when we feel left out.
Then the conversation shifts into an eye-opening therapy session using Parts Work (Internal Family Systems / IFS), where hidden emotional "parts" begin to reveal themselves. Anxiety, anger, people pleasing, emotional suppression, and fear of conflict all collide in an honest discussion about why expressing anger can feel so dangerous—and how childhood conditioning can shape the way we react as adults.
A therapy session introduces a surprisingly strange cast of characters from inside his own head—including an extremely anxious robot and a very unexpected voice of reason.
Lou and Michael unpack what anxiety is actually trying to accomplish, why uncertainty can feel so threatening, and what it takes to start trusting yourself when your brain keeps insisting that something could go wrong.
It's funny, uncomfortable, unexpectedly emotional, and filled with the kind of therapy revelations that make you stop and go, “...oh.”
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti Theme Music: Jamie Franks
The conversation gets especially interesting when we dig into why change can feel impossible even when you desperately want it. Instead of relying on belief, trust, or massive life overhauls, we talk about noticing small changes, gathering evidence, and creating a feedback loop that builds confidence over time. We also explore the difference between trying to force yourself to change and understanding the patterns that are already shaping your behavior.
Plus: discipline vs. motivation, core values, minimalism, authenticity, kindness vs. niceness, and why being “nicer” might actually be harder than it sounds.
If you've ever wondered why you keep repeating the same patterns, struggled to trust yourself, felt stuck trying to change, or questioned whether your intuition is actually telling you something, this episode is for you.
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti Theme Music: Jamie Franks
Topics include: intuition, manifestation, executive dysfunction, self-awareness, personal growth, healing your past self, behavioral patterns, discipline, intentional living, core values, authenticity, confidence, emotional healing, self-improvement, and therapy.
Lou digs into what codependency and low self-esteem look like in everyday life—from difficulty making decisions and valuing other people’s opinions over your own to seeking praise, struggling with healthy boundaries, and needing external validation. They also explore how childhood experiences can shape confidence, emotional regulation, and the ability to process your own feelings.
Meanwhile, Michael confronts his own relationship with defensiveness, accountability, perfectionism, and the instinct to explain himself whenever he feels criticized. Is providing context actually helpful—or is it just a very articulate way of avoiding “I fucked up”?
The conversation gets into emotional intelligence, conflict in relationships, resentment, holding space, vulnerability, self-worth, childhood emotional neglect, processing emotions, and the difference between taking accountability and beating yourself up.
And, naturally, there is an extended discussion about cereal for dinner.
They also get into control, projection, relationship boundaries, communication, emotional responsibility, gaslighting, the importance of language, and the uncomfortable reality that sometimes the people criticizing us online might actually have a point.
Because growth isn't about being right all the time. It's about being willing to look at yourself when you might be wrong—and figuring out what feedback is actually worth listening to.
Secondhand Therapy is a mental health and comedy podcast about relationships, vulnerability, men's mental health, emotional growth, therapy, anxiety, communication, and the messy process of figuring yourself out.
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti Theme Music: Jamie Franks
Topics include: social media criticism, being misunderstood, internet judgment, relationships, jealousy, flirting, relationship boundaries, emotional accountability, personal responsibility, control, projection, communication, gaslighting, therapy, self-reflection, men's mental health, vulnerability, emotional growth, and learning when to take criticism seriously.
The guys also explore one of the hardest relationship questions: How do you know when it's time to leave? They discuss emotional exhaustion, falling in and out of love, long-term relationships, fear of commitment, avoiding vulnerability after heartbreak, and whether love is something you choose over and over again.
Later, they unpack a book about curiosity, emotional healing, and breaking old thought patterns, leading to a conversation about anxiety, self-awareness, emotional growth, therapy, and rewriting the stories we inherited about ourselves.
If you've ever struggled with dating, relationships, overthinking, emotional avoidance, attachment, vulnerability, or figuring out whether to stay or walk away, this episode is for you.
Louie and Michael also explore the difference between happiness and fulfillment, why expressing emotions is essential for human connection, learning new skills as adults, and how fear quietly controls more of our lives than we realize.
If you've struggled with grief, emotional neglect, family trauma, unresolved anger, people pleasing, self-worth, or healing your inner child, this episode will probably hit close to home—with plenty of laughs along the way.
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti Theme Music: Jamie Franks
Topics include: therapy, grief, emotional healing, childhood trauma, parent-child relationships, anger, emotional vulnerability, people pleasing, happiness vs. fulfillment, self-discovery, fear, emotional regulation, personal growth, mental health, and healing from the past.
The conversation takes an unexpected turn as Michael opens up about seeing someone who reminded him of his late mother, leading to a powerful discussion about complicated grief, survivor's guilt, healing after losing a parent, and learning how to carry someone forward without letting loss define your life.
If you've ever struggled with anxiety, attachment, abandonment fears, people-pleasing, grief, emotional healing, or wondered why healthy love feels uncomfortable, this episode is for you.
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti Theme Music: Jamie Franks
Topics include: grief, therapy, codependency, self-sabotage, fear of abandonment, attachment styles, childhood trauma, emotional healing, love addiction (SLAA), relationships, mental health, vulnerability, recovery, loss, and personal growth.
They also discuss Internal Family Systems (IFS), parts work, body image, self-consciousness, nervous system regulation, mindfulness, and why learning to tolerate uncertainty may be one of the hardest—and most healing—skills we can develop.
If you've ever struggled with overthinking, anxiety, perfectionism, control issues, or feeling like your brain never stops planning for the worst, this episode is for you.
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti Theme Music: Jamie Franks
Topics: anxiety, control, overthinking, perfectionism, Internal Family Systems (IFS), parts work, codependency, people pleasing, nervous system healing, emotional healing, self-worth, mindfulness, camping, therapy, mental health podcast.
If you've ever struggled with rejection sensitivity, conflict avoidance, emotional regulation, overthinking, anxiety, or understanding your own emotional triggers, this episode will probably feel uncomfortably familiar.
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti Theme Music: Jamie Franks
Topics include: Parts Work (IFS), Internal Family Systems therapy, anxiety, anger, emotional healing, rejection, friendship, people pleasing, attachment, emotional regulation, trauma responses, boundaries, therapy, self-awareness, vulnerability, relationships, personal growth, mental health, emotional intelligence, and healing childhood patterns.
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