ResponseABLE Parenting – Détails, épisodes et analyse

In this episode I share how to approach the holidays from a nervous system perspective. When there is prediction there is less friction. So we are not leaving the days up to chance. We are creating focused blocks of time that engage our children in activities they like and want to do. We are prioritizing what they want to have happen and we are creating a little mystery with some special time blocks as well. 

Additionally, with extended family, let's get them on board by creating a menu to choose from where they get their 1:1 time, but with things that are predictable and accepted. 

And finally, the main key to making this all work is the regulation breaks that help us transition out of one activity into the next. 

I hope this serves you very well this holiday and I can't wait to hear how you implement this strategy!

🎉REWIRE with ResponseABLE Parenting🎉

Put an end to the exhausting patterns you find yourself in day in and day out with your kids. Goodbye to power struggles, defiance, transition battles, and more.

With REWIRE you will have the exact steps you need in order to:

• Understand why you get so triggered

• What to do for yourself and your child in the heat of a triggering moment

• How to regulate your nervous system to regain control of the moment

• How to respond with connection and clarity

These are the only steps you'll ever need as a parent. 

From a screaming toddler who can't seem to calm down – to your teenager who broke curfew…again. 

The support you NEED.
The skills your child REQUIRES!

START HERE! Grab this exclusive free training and book your free call!
https://www.responseableparenting.com/rewire 

BE A GUEST ON THE PODCAST!
If you would like to be a guest on the podcast and troubleshoot what's going on for you in real time, please fill out the podcast submission form. I look forward to connecting with you! Submit here: https://bit.ly/4c57Tx5 

ALL YOUR FREE RESOURCES!

• Tired of repeating yourself over the same behaviors? Try this VALUES DECK OF CARDS! You can customize the cards to your family values and instead of dishing out yet another punishment, you can instill positive consequences through the actions on the back!
  https://responseableparenting.kit.com/cards
  
  

• Get the cheat codes to "stack" regulation practices throughout your day! No time to meditate? No problem. Grab this simple system and add ZERO time to your day!
  https://responseableparenting.kit.com/zero
  

• Discover how PLAY can rapidly transform unwanted behavior and restore peace in your home in this free training!
  https://responseableparenting.kit.com/playvideo
  
  

• Make sure you grab my Free Guide to Managing Meltdowns:
  4 steps to get you through your kid's meltdown without snapping!
  https://responseableparenting.ck.page/meltdown
  
  

• You absolutely need my Free Guide To Stop Yelling:
  This guide will walk you through the process of staying regulated and give you tools to use during high stress moments.
  https://responseableparenting.ck.page/yelling
  
  

• Does it feel impossible to access playful, connected strategies when you're not getting the cooperation you need in the moment? Grab this free guide where I share 70 play based starter phrases!
  https://responseableparenting.kit.com/play 

Book a call with me to connect on areas of your parenting that are causing pain, struggle, or frustration. https://calendly.com/responseableparenting/call 

In this episode I have the pleasure of interviewing Julie Rainer on the topic of relational aggression in schools. Julie is a school counselor and founder of IMPACT Kids Coach. Julie helps children and parents navigate tricky friendships, relational aggression, and the hidden side of bullying. She's spent years working with kids from early childhood through high school, and has developed a practical framework that teaches kids how to recognize harm, respond with confidence, and repair relationships. She's also a mom of four, so she brings both professional insight and real-life parenting perspective. 

You can find Julie at https://impactkidscoach.com

🎉REWIRE with ResponseABLE Parenting🎉

Put an end to the exhausting patterns you find yourself in day in and day out with your kids. Goodbye to power struggles, defiance, transition battles, and more.

With REWIRE you will have the exact steps you need in order to:

• Understand why you get so triggered

• What to do for yourself and your child in the heat of a triggering moment

• How to regulate your nervous system to regain control of the moment

• How to respond with connection and clarity

These are the only steps you'll ever need as a parent. 

From a screaming toddler who can't seem to calm down – to your teenager who broke curfew…again. 

The support you NEED.
The skills your child REQUIRES!

START HERE! Grab this exclusive free training and book your free call!
https://www.responseableparenting.com/rewire 

BE A GUEST ON THE PODCAST!
If you would like to be a guest on the podcast and troubleshoot what's going on for you in real time, please fill out the podcast submission form. I look forward to connecting with you! Submit here: https://bit.ly/4c57Tx5 

ALL YOUR FREE RESOURCES!

• Tired of repeating yourself over the same behaviors? Try this VALUES DECK OF CARDS! You can customize the cards to your family values and instead of dishing out yet another punishment, you can instill positive consequences through the actions on the back!
  https://responseableparenting.kit.com/cards
  
  

• Get the cheat codes to "stack" regulation practices throughout your day! No time to meditate? No problem. Grab this simple system and add ZERO time to your day!
  https://responseableparenting.kit.com/zero
  
  

• Discover how PLAY can rapidly transform unwanted behavior and restore peace in your home in this free training!
  https://responseableparenting.kit.com/playvideo
  
  

• Make sure you grab my Free Guide to Managing Meltdowns:
  4 steps to get you through your kid's meltdown without snapping!
  https://responseableparenting.ck.page/meltdown
  
  

• You absolutely need my Free Guide To Stop Yelling:
  This guide will walk you through the process of staying regulated and give you tools to use during high stress moments.
  https://responseableparenting.ck.page/yelling
  
  

• Does it feel impossible to access playful, connected strategies when you're not getting the cooperation you need in the moment? Grab this free guide where I share 70 play based starter phrases!
  https://responseableparenting.kit.com/play 

Book a call with me to connect on areas of your parenting that are causing pain, struggle, or frustration. https://calendly.com/responseableparenting/call

In this podcast episode, I'm sharing the eulogy I gave at my father's funeral this past weekend. It was 8 lessons I learned from him over the years that I want to anchor my parenting as I move through this world without him. 

🎉REWIRE with ResponseABLE Parenting is HERE!!!🎉
You will never need to frantically reach for another script, tool, or strategy again!

With REWIRE you will have the exact steps you need in order to:

• Understand why you get so triggered

• What to do for yourself and your child in the heat of a triggering moment

• How to regulate your nervous system to regain control of the moment

• How to respond with connection and clarity

These are the only steps you'll ever need as a parent. 

From a screaming toddler who can't seem to calm down – to your teenager who broke curfew…again. 

With REWIRE you will have access to my 30 day nervous system regulation program FAST WAY TO REGULATE. 

This 4 week program is a masterclass in neural reprogramming. Fancy words for saying - you'll change your brain to do what you want vs. what it always does that causes ruptures and guilt!

Once you know how to regulate your body under stress - you'll move onto  S.T.U.C.K. to S.T.R.O.N.G.  Inside you'll learn how to adjust the gentle scripts you've heard to actually match the intensity of your child. This program unlocks the communication tools that have felt so out of reach for so long. Throughout the program you'll learn how to create internal safety and strength so the external chaos doesn't phase you.

The support you NEED.
The skills your child REQUIRES!

And for those who crave personalized feedback and want to hyperspeed their results - join REWIRE Level Up.  Here you'll get 6 months of weekly coaching calls and a private support page where you get my hands on support to speed up your results even more! I'll get to know your individual challenges and be able to dial in specific strategies that are tailored to meet your needs.

Don't miss out: Check out the complete REWIRE program & Level Up today! 
Plus get an exclusive free training! https://www.responseableparenting.com/rewire 

BE A GUEST ON THE PODCAST!
If you would like to be a guest on the podcast and troubleshoot what's going on for you in real time, please fill out the podcast submission form. I look forward to connecting with you! Submit here: https://bit.ly/4c57Tx5 

ALL YOUR FREE RESOURCES!

• Get the cheat codes to "stack" regulation practices throughout your day! No time to meditate? No problem. Grab this simple system and add ZERO time to your day!
  https://responseableparenting.kit.com/zero
  
  

• Discover how PLAY can rapidly transform unwanted behavior and restore peace in your home in this free training!
  https://responseableparenting.kit.com/playvideo
  
  

• Make sure you grab my Free Guide to Managing Meltdowns:
  4 steps to get you through your kid's meltdown without snapping!
  https://responseableparenting.ck.page/meltdown
  
  

• You absolutely need my Free Guide To Stop Yelling:
  This guide will walk you through the process of staying regulated and give you tools to use during high stress moments.
  https://responseableparenting.ck.page/yelling
  
  

• Does it feel impossible to access playful, connected strategies when you're not getting the cooperation you need in the moment? Grab this free guide where I share 70 play based starter phrases!
  https://responseableparenting.kit.com/play 

This is such a tricky topic. Most of us were raised in a time without phones in our pockets let alone social media. A lot can come up for us around this topic. We want to make sure we are protecting our children from unwanted bullying, pressures and images. We want to keep their innocence as long as possible. AND we don't want them to be left out, embarrassed, or made fun of for not having access to the same things their friends do. In this episode, I share a few ideas on how to have this discussion with your children. I explore questions to ask so that we have a more neutral approach and come to the table with fewer judgements and more openness so our children feel heard and understood in the process of this decision. Ultimately I cannot answer whether or not your children should or should not be on social. My hope and goal would be for you both to have a more empowered conversation and feel solid in your path forward together.

In this episode, we dive into a listener's questions about how to get their son to practice. I talk about how we as parents can "future project" when our kids won't complete the simplest task we are asking them to do and how that projection can distort the way we respond to and treat our children. I share some skills to help gain a better understanding around what is going on for us (childhood beliefs and default patterns) as well as for our children and how to be more compassionate and both feel like our needs are getting met.

I too struggle with chaos. I am an extremely reactive person and hold onto anger and frustration for a long time. It's something I've always done and one of the big reasons I started parent coaching. Without tools, I'm a reactive mess! In this episode, I talk about a recent morning where so many things seemed to go wrong that I was completely drained before the day even began. My morning got messier and messier the more I tried to stay in logic mode. I was stuck in problem-solving mode and in reality, if I had stayed in empathy, the problems of the morning would have likely resolved themselves. In this episode, I share some steps that I took (not executed nearly as well as I wanted) to keep us in connection in spite of the domino effect that was my messy morning.

In this episode, I get the pleasure of interviewing Feng Shui expert Patricia Lohan. Patricia shares incredible stories of how small shifts in the home transformed her clients' jobs, relationships, and spilled over into their children's lives. Trouble with homework? There's a feng shui answer for that. Siblings fighting, there's a feng shui answer for that too! Patricia shares so many doable ways to start improving the energy of your home and therefore your family!

I'm a little fired up about this topic! Because it's true! Default parents are NOT allowed to be inconvenient.  We are in constant service. We are the ones making sure all wants, needs, ambitions, feelings, etc are being tended to, nurtured and cared for and serviced. And when we are off, the whole family is off. Being all things, for all people, at all times is not sustainable. It's exhausting and not right. In this episode, I talk about ways to shake it up a bit and become a little less convenient as the default parent! 

Today we dive deeper into childhood beliefs around being "good" and your "goodness" as a person. I share more stories from my Telluride adventure with my parents and what I've been able to uncover since. From this trip, I've been able to connect the dots between my performative goodness and my real goodness. I have since realized that as a pastor's daughter, it was vital to my dad's appearance and success for his family to be a reflection of his goodness. Growing up in this space, there was a deep understanding or expectation of showing "good" behavior at all times. When we did this, and did it well, we had more validation, and more connection, and it felt like we had more value. So in my brain, the neurons that fired together were "goodness / worthiness," and they became deeply wired. 

Fast forward to a trip with my parents and my kids. My kids weren't performing to the same level of goodness that was expected of me as a child and so my wiring was going crazy. My value, my worth, my goodness felt in question because my children were not acting in accordance with my childhood expectations. I reacted from that place and did more to preserve the connection to my father, than I did to stay in connection with my son. This is a heartfelt discussion on external validation and I hope it brings light and clarity into areas within you that feel tricky and sticky when you are with your parents and your kids at the same time.

I get a lot of feedback on my Instagram reels about how I am NOT teaching my children to be respectful. While I could debate that, I don't need to waste my energy because I know that's not true AND I know that I'm teaching my kids "respect" but in a different way. I am teaching my kids kindness, empathy, compassion, how to work in a group setting, generosity, and how to make a kind request vs. a demand. I believe respect can only be learned once it is modeled. And the only way it's truly integrated and not a forced behavior is when it's modeled TO your children. So I model respect by simply asking "Is that a request or a demand" when they ask me for something. Instead of shaming them into respect by saying "You're not allowed to talk to me like that!" I calmly say "Hey buddy, was that a request or a demand?" They instantly understand that they've barked an order, and they adjust by adding please, they adopt a different tone, and they ask a complete sentence soaking in "respect." I haven't had to beat the idea of "say your please and thank yous!" into them. They understand it because we practice dozens of times a day on how to make your words land with kindness and generosity vs. demands and orders.