Get Your Marriage On! with Dan Purcell – Détails, épisodes et analyse

In today's episode, Dr. Corey Allen joins us for a deep dive into fictional, but incredibly common, marriage scenarios that reveal surprising truths about desire, conflict, and emotional maturity.

We explore how sexual and relational struggles aren't mistakes—they are intentional invitations to grow up, become more courageous, and see our spouse more clearly.

In this episode, we cover:

• Why sexual struggles are built into the work of marriage

• How meanings—not the issue itself—drive most conflicts

• How to own your part in the marriage

• Why many husbands unconsciously hedge their investment

• The danger of "minimum requirement" sex

• What real married love is

• What is actually better than "being happy" in marriage

If you're ready to see your marriage challenges from a whole new angle, this episode will change the way you think about intimacy and growth and the purpose of marriage. 

Links Mentioned:

• Apply for the next Get Your Marriage On! Program: getyourmarriageon.com/program

• Learn more about Dr. Corey Allen: SMR.fm (Sexy Marriage Radio)

Events:

• In-Person Retreat April 2025 (We're sold out, but you can apply to get on the waitlist!)

• NEW Get Your Marriage On! Cruise: October 2026 

Disclaimer: The opinions and values expressed by guests on the Get Your Marriage On! podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and values of the host. Appearance on the podcast does not imply an endorsement of the guest or their products by Get Your Marriage On or its host. While we work hard to bring you quality and valuable content, listeners are encouraged to use their own best judgment in applying the information or products discussed on this podcast.

Money and intimacy have more in common than most couples realize.

In this episode, we sit down with financial coach Dan Ockey to talk about financial intimacy — how the way you manage money together reflects the way you handle trust, communication, and teamwork in every other area of your marriage (yes, even the bedroom).

You'll hear Dan Ockey's incredible story of turning debt, secrecy, and shame into a story of honesty, unity, and freedom — and how money challenges can actually strengthen your relationship if you face them together.

In this episode:

• How financial habits mirror sexual habits in marriage

• Why secrecy and pride around money create the same distance as sexual disconnection

• Simple mindset shifts that restore trust and teamwork

If you've ever argued about money, felt shame around spending, or struggled to get on the same page with your spouse — this episode will help you see finances not as a source of stress, but as a powerful tool for connection and intimacy.

👉 Learn more about Dan Oakey and Sensei Financial at www.centseifinance.com
👉 Apply for the Get Your Marriage On! coaching program at getyourmarriageon.com/program

Disclaimer: The opinions and values expressed by guests on the Get Your Marriage On! podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and values of the host. Appearance on the podcast does not imply an endorsement of the guest or their products by Get Your Marriage On or its host. While we work hard to bring you quality and valuable content, listeners are encouraged to use their own best judgment in applying the information or products discussed on this podcast.

Do you know what arouses you?

Knowing that could completely change the way you show up in the bedroom.

In this episode, we dive into the difference between desire and arousal, and why understanding your own arousal triggers is the missing link to greater confidence, deeper intimacy, and more passionate sex in marriage.

We cover the history of our scientific understanding of arousal and the sexual experience, including our most recent insights on how context, trust, and emotional closeness play a huge role in arousal—especially for women. We'll also explore how positive sexual experiences build on each other, creating momentum for more intimacy and joy in your relationship.

By the end, you'll not only understand the science of arousal better, but you'll also walk away with ideas you can use to strengthen your connection, boost your sexual confidence, and build a marriage that feels more alive and passionate than ever!

Don't miss . . . 

• Our Virtual Getaway – The Anatomy of Arousal (Sept 26–27): a spicy, nourishing, live, at-home retreat for couples, plus so many bonuses!

• Our Private Facebook Group: Christian Couples Improving Sex & Intimacy

We recently hit a major milestone with this podcast: 1 million downloads! Thank you for your support!

Let's be honest here. Initiating sex is not easy at all. We want the other person to take charge and initiate, right? We worry, how are we going to be received? There's also so much of ourselves wrapped up in what it means to initiate, or not initiate, sex. And past experiences tend to influence our reluctance to initiate as well. Yet, the reality is if one of you doesn't initiate sex, sex is never going to happen in your relationship. 

So why is initiating sex so hard? What are some common reasons why people, me included, struggle to initiate sex sometimes? How do we get better at this very intimate act of bidding for sexual connection?

I've been pondering these questions lately, and I'm grateful to meet up with James Christiansen, a licensed marriage and family therapist from Roseville, California. You'll quickly find out that he has a brilliant sharp mind and quickly cuts right to the heart of the matter.  

And this episode, we're going to talk about what's at the heart of initiating sex, because it gets a lot deeper than what you're probably thinking. And by the end of this episode, hopefully you'll take more courageous action to cherish your spouse more than before.   

Links referenced in the episode:

⬇️ Download the Intimately Us and get in on the Sextimacy Challenge before it's over!

🌟 Get info on the DIY Boudoir Date Night Box

🙋 Snag the last spot at our couples retreat coming up in just 5 weeks!

Do you wish you could have more powerful, more pleasurable orgasms? Or to not need to cross your legs when you sneeze? Or jump on the trampoline like you used to before kids?  

Studies show only about 30% of women have an orgasm from penetration. But perhaps that number could be higher if your pelvic floor (the muscles in and around your vagina) were in better condition.

Research also shows that the stronger and healthier your pelvic floor muscles are, the more pleasure you'll find from orgasms (the orgasm is the most powerful pelvic floor contraction possible!), and no pain from intercourse too!

Our special guest Pauli Hannan is a Pelvic Floor Physical Therapist that specializes in helping women have a better life with a healthier pelvic floor. 

She's created No Kegel University, where she debunks the idea that you need to do more Kegel exercises or buy vaginal ben-wa balls to strengthen your pelvic floor.

This episode is an abridged version of a live 90-minute workshop, and you can watch the full replay on our website.

Although this content is directed towards women, men are invited to learn along. After all, men have pelvic floors that need strengthening too!  

Today I want to talk about embracing your eroticism. This is a beautiful part of being human; your eroticism is going to be unique to you just as your fingerprints are unique to you! 

In this episode, we're going to address the following common questions:

• What is eroticism?
• Why is eroticism such an important part of a thriving marriage?
• Why are most people afraid of it? 
• How do you figure out what your eroticism is?
• How do you figure out what gets you going?
• How do you cultivate more of this goodness in your life?

And, we also give you some fun "would you rather" questions you can use as a spring board to understand your own and your spouse's erotic interests. 

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Resources we mentioned in the episode:

DIY Boudoir Date Night Box: We've teamed up with EveryLove Intimates to bring you this kit that brings the magic of a professional boudoir photoshoot right to the comfort of your home!

Couples Retreat (only 3 spots left!)

Picture this: sunny days, red rock landscapes, and outdoor adventures, coupled with a perfect balance of powerful instruction on sex and intimacy, personalized expert coaching, relaxed downtime (wink wink), in a supportive environment. So why not register today before someone else takes your spot? Come join us in March!

Just Between Us app: This app is linked directly to your spouse and it encrypts everything so you never have to worry about your intimate photos or conversations accidentally going to someone unintended!

DIY or professionally done, boudoir photography has the potential to empower women and open their minds and hearts to their own inherent beauty, as well as add an extra spark and intimacy to a marriage. 

I discuss this and more with my guest today, Sierra Beltran, an experienced photographer from Arizona. In this podcast episode, we talk about the following in our deep dive on boudoir photography:

• How it can benefit you and your marriage
• What to expect
• What common objections there are to having boudoir photos done
• Concerns about faith and nudity 
• Ways to feel more confident in your photos
• How to do your own boudoir photography at home with a lot of fantastic DIY tips from a professional 

If you're interested in DIY boudoir photography at home, I have two fantastic resources for you!

1. EveryLove Intimated DIY Boudoir Photography Date Night Box. We have partnered with EveryLove Intimates, one of our favorite lingerie and date night box brands to create a DIY Photo box. This box comes with everything you need for a memorable at-home boudoir experience and date night. My wife and I recently did the DIY session with the items in this box, and it has definitely easily become one of our top 10, most memorable date nights.
2. Just Between Us App. If you want to share your photos with your spouse, you can do it safely on this app. It encrypts everything so you never have to worry about your intimate photos or conversations accidentally going to someone unintended. Also, there's a feature where you can take photos now and send them later.  

Sex can be hard for couples for many reasons. And if you feel like it's hard for you right now, you're not alone. Sex is so highly personal and it's a very anxious behavior, yet it's also at the core of who we are. So it's like this dichotomy: we want to be close to another person, yet, in order to get there, we have to overcome a lot of nervousness and anxiety in order to enjoy that. And by the way, sex is so much more than just two bodies bumping into each other; our minds and our spirits are highly involved in sex as well.

Humans are the only species on earth capable of making meaning in sex. Dogs don't have sex and think, "Oh, he really loves me." Or, "She was really into that." Dogs and other animals don't do that. It's a very human thing to find meaning in sex. And, that's a double-edged sword for a lot of people.

The anxiety in sex make sex a horrible experience or a difficult experience to enjoy for some people. But the flip side of that is the transcendent capacity for deep connection that can come through sex. It is one of the most unique human and wonderful things about being a person.

So in this episode, we dive deep into why sex can be hard for couples. Understanding our hangups and why we have them is the first step to overcoming them!

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Valentine's Day is coming up, and that means so is our 14-Day Sextimacy Challenge! Watch the Intimately Us app for more details!

Our free workshop coming up on January 19 will be all about increasing pelvic floor health. Strong pelvic floors benefit us in so many ways. I hope you'll join us! Details will be hitting your inbox soon.

The life-changing Get Your Marriage On! couples retreat is coming up just around the corner. There are only a couple weeks left to sign up before registrations are closed! Grab your spot today!

Who in your relationship has more of a say in general, who in your relationship organizes themselves around the other more? Are there any unaddressed resentments that you deal with in your relationship right now, do some things feel just one sided in your marriage? Couples that thrive have a shared sense of power in the relationship power in this context is defined as note shared power shared influence. 

One person can receive the influence from the other. The moment we start creating hierarchies in our relationship. Meaning one person is more important than the other, or the general order of things goes like, no, God husband, wife, for example. When we create these hierarchies in our relationship, we set ourselves up for power struggles and this often undermines sexual desire and intimacy in the marriage. I work with couples that want to grow their sexual relationship. 

And that's one of the purposes of this podcast. The reality is you grow the sexual relationship by strengthening the marriage and upgrading the relationship dynamic. One way to quickly improve your sex life is by paying close attention to the power dynamics at play in a relationship. And some of them might be invisible to you or very covert. My guest today is Bonnie Young. 

She's a licensed marriage and family therapist licensed in Utah in Washington state. She's also currently working on her PhD. 

She's super smart, caring. And as you'll get to know, very experienced in this topic we're going to talk about today.

She's also a mom of two, almost three children and runs a mental health clinic with almost a dozen therapists working for her in two states in her spare time. 

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Ready to level up your marriage this year? Check out our romantic and life-changing marriage retreat coming up this March!  

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For more fun, connection, and intimacy daily, download our free app: Intimately Us

Five years ago, around the campfire with friends, one man told me about this amazing trip he and his wife made to Thailand where they camped out on the beach in this pristine tropical bay. And another friend told me about his trip to the Dominican Republic at is all inclusive resort, just he and his wife. And another guy talked about this cruise, he and his wife went on and all these fun and exciting trips with just their wives. 

And I was so, feeling sorry for myself. I had extreme case of FOMO. I wanted to get away with my wife, but I just felt like I couldn't because of the circumstances in my life. 

Long story short, we finally made that trip happen. We had so much fun and we just really needed this time together, this time away. And that experience of getting away just the two of us really nourished our relationship and boosted us like nothing else. So since that time we've gone at least on one weekend away together every three months, about four times a year, and it's become something we really look forward to doing in our marriage. 

And it's become a staple for helping our relationship thrive. 

In this episode, you get to hear a little bit more about this vacation my wife and I finally went on, but you also hear from a Romance Consultant, Joise McEwen, about how to plan your own romantic getaway, how to make vacation sex successful, and hopefully gain inspiration to make a getaway a goal for your marriage.

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If you want to take you getaway up a level, check out our couples retreat coming up in March! Get all the details at getyourmarriageon.com/couples-retreat/.

And if you're looking for ways to add fun and spice to the bedroom on the regular, on vacation or not, check out the Intimately Us app!