Two Girls One Mic: The Porncast – Details, episodes & analysis

It's everyone! Alice Vaughn (@rationalblonde), Kate Kennedy (@TheOGKennedy), Meredith Jaqueline (@themeredith), and Natalia Reagan (@natalia13reagan) all join together on this rousing final episode. The ladies discuss porn hospitals, slicing/dicing your vag, handjob models, Nancy throatcoat Reagan, breast pumping, mommy issues, kids, ass men and bass men, favorite guests and future projects. 

Thank you for supporting the show, it's been an incredible 3 years

Alice and Kate are joined by comedian Josh Potter (@J_Potter)! The trio contemplate the age old question "is cum keto?" as well as veneers, Ron Jeremy, divorce, Doug the Pug, where is incest legal, raising the marital age, porn reunions, a Brady Bunch porn review, and more!

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https://patreon.com/twogirlsonemic

Alice is joined by comics and fellow Trek nerds, Andrew Heaton (@MightyHeaton) and Paul Mattingly (@thefamouspaul)! The trio discuss Klingon and intergalactic curse words, Star Trek sets, Klingon double dicks, holodeck ethics, cum roombas, John McAfee, and more! They also the review "Star Trek: The Next Generation - A XXX Parody"

Find Andrew's books, shows, and podcasts here:
https://mightyheaton.com/

Check out Paul's show, Hey Scoops:
https://heyscoops.com/

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Or leave us a review or share the show with friends! 

Alice and Natalia are joined by phone sex operator Amberly Rothfield (@AmberlyPSO) and dish on how she's able to make 10 GRAND a month as a phone hoe. Learn how she handles different fetishes, uses props for sound effects, ASMR, and why someone needs to hire Natalia for their marketing department. 

Support us on Patreon for a BONUS episode! 

Buy Amberly's Book
Check out the free version here 

Alice is joined by guest host Allison McKnight (@thatmcknight) and AVN Hall of Fame director, Eli Cross (@eli_cross) to talk porn bloopers, a literal "shit geyser", porn squirting, urine spitting, money laundering, VISA being the ultimate censor, actor rates, and much more. Support us on Patreon!  

Alice (@RationalBlonde) is joined by Natalia Reagan(@natalia13reagan) and comedian Alex Falcone (@alex_falcone) to review Napornean Dynamite, talk monkey sex, Big Foot porn, polar bear abortions, and rate Natalia's feet. 

Alex's podcast: Read it and Weep

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Alice is joined by guest co-host Allison McKnight (@thatmcknight) and N.S.F.W. sex club owner, Daniel Saynt (@danielsaynt). Sex club info and etiquette , religious repression, sex club themes, and more. 

Support us on Patreon!

0:09
Welcome to Two girls one Mic the podcast whose sex club rules are exactly the same as Fight Club, and coincidentally also run by Joseph Gordon Levitt with dissociative identity disorder.

0:21
So hot

0:23
actually was really hot. It's a newest club in New York actually. So with me, you guys are probably hearing a familiar voice. That is the voice of my beautiful guest co host, Allison McKnight from our et episode, Alison, how you doing today? I am

0:42
doing that's about as far as I got. But now you said Joseph Gordon Levitt, so I'm doing better.

0:48
Does anyone have any connections to him that we know of? I'd like to be connected to him. Daniel, how about you? Do you have any connections to

0:54
him? Don't reveal any member details. Oh,

1:00
No. Oh, I forgot to introduce myself. Guys. I'm your host, Alice Vaughn. And with me You guys are hearing Daniel St. He is. And I have never heard this job title before chief conspirator of ns, Fw the new society for wellness, new society

1:19
for wellness. It's really good when you can make up your own title. It's really it's really helpful. You can have some fun with

1:24
what are the other options?

1:27
I don't think there are any, there really were any other ones. I mean, this felt like such an underground thing from the beginning. So conspirator just made sense. And before I was like, kind of open and public about doing this, that was what was used in press. So it certainly felt right.

1:41
It feels like you should have a more significant role in some sort of elaborate, I don't know, international scheme.

1:48
Yeah, that's literally what we're trying to do.

1:51
Very public about it.

1:54
Yeah, change sex perceptions around the world. Why not?

1:56
So yeah, so you run a sex club and we've actually never had Sex club owner on this show before.

2:03
For some of our listeners, you want to give a quick definition of a sex club, like a rundown description, something to kind of give them context.

2:10
Yeah. So I mean, I think a lot of people think of sex club as a place where you go to have sex, that's a big part of it for us, we kind of do a lot more around the space. So not only we hosting events where sex is allowed, and sex is okay to have we do education around sex. So we teach about BDSM to Tantra, we teach about touch relationships, how to be in open relationships, how to ask for sex, so we're constantly covering different subjects in the world of sex. So it's a sex club, in the sense of, it's all about sex, but it's more different from what people would traditionally think of when they think of a sex club and the audience that we attract. And the people that are here is very, very different from any other sex club that exist around the world. So it's kind of unique in that way. We like to call it a love club, because there's more focused on that than anything else.

2:57
How did you even get into this industry? I'm curious. Yes,

3:01
well, my background is actually in fashion. I started off as a fashion blogger then became really popular, took over for marketing for a big handbag line, which did very, very well and maybe a little bit famous in that space. And then started an agency where I was representing digital influencers, and then bought a magazine called nylon and then realize I hated fashion and consumerism and trying to get people to buy things that didn't actually make them happy. And I wanted to apply my skills to something that could make people happy. So I decided to focus on sex and cannabis. But that's just one of the reasons why I started as a W. It's like it's very, there's so many factors into it. Like around the time I was coming out as bisexual, I wanted to be more open with my sexuality and talk about it. I felt like there wasn't really anyone out there who's male bisexual who's like, you know, presenting and being open and honest about it. So that was a big factor. I just got through a divorce, which was very, very difficult, very connected to my bisexuality, which was unfortunate, but I kind of felt a need to, I don't know, bring people together and teach them about sex and like make it less scary. Make less time Boo, make it a community make it a place where you know that people are coming, you know, they're behaving a certain way and you know that it's safe. So yeah, and so Toby kind of sparked from all that. I had a very religious background, which helped with it because you just kind of realize how kind of backward some of that stuff is and how detrimental shame is for people in general and teaching them to live more shamelessly teaching them to be more proud about who they are and more comfortable with their sexuality is a very key element of, I guess, the programming that we try to instill in our members and try to teach them that it's okay to be sexual.

4:33
That's awesome. So we went from fashion to influencers to sex clubs, I mean, trying to feel like I feel like that's not even a hard jump.

4:42
I mean, it really was, I don't know I had done it like secretly for like two years just testing it out, testing out all the classes and events and things I want to create, and just building the community initially from like my friend group and people I knew. So we have a lot of people who are kind of in the fashion industry or models or you know, in those Kind of media driven industries, which was nice. It's what a lot of us get so much of the press that we got. So we've been very fortunate to build a really cool community, a very interesting community, very influential community. And now we're kind of taking that forward and pushing more into politics and pushing more into how we change the law and how we change the way people approach sex. Yeah, that's kind of the most of it. I mean, there's so much stuff going on here. Like it's really, it's a little insane where the company is right now. And what we've built is, it's just very interesting. It's like, I've hosted over a 500 play parties. I've seen so many people having sex, and so we will share their sex lives and so many people share the things that, you know, could they kind of discover the gain from it, and it's just encouraging. Like, I feel like we'll have these all around the world at some point.

5:45
You mentioned that yours is different than other sex clubs. I'll be frank, I've never visited a sex club. So I don't know that different types. Allison, do you have more experience here?

5:54
I do have more experience. Yes, but they're all different. So that's why I am Tim because like when I mentioned sex clubs to friends, they're like, what happens at sex clubs? Are they make some stupid joke and they're all different and who's running them changes Exactly. And what their focus is what their rules are.

6:13
Yeah, I think before I started NSFW, probably around the age of 16, I started going to sex clubs and just seeing what was out there. You know, being bisexual, go to gay clubs, go to St spaces, kind of really getting a feel for what was available. And I travel the world a lot. So I went to a lot of international spaces. And I kind of just came up to this realization that a lot of the sex that's available for men is just not available for women. And a lot of the spaces that exists, we're just not safe. It was a lot of consent violations. I've been sexually assaulted multiple times, raped multiple times. And it just became something where it didn't feel like that was the place that people would discover sexuality. That's not the place where people are going to feel comfortable exploring their sexuality or enjoying it or trying new things. So it kinda was just seeing like, there wasn't a place in the market space that really catered to women specifically, but also cater to those who want to exist in a space where consent is respected. And enthusiastic consent is practice. And before anyone touches you, they ask and a woman can come solo and walk around naked and not feel harassed, you know. So it was going through those experiences negatively positively seeing what I enjoyed seeing what I liked, and picking and choosing things that made sense. And then, over the past five years of building this really setting the model for how people should engage in group sex, how people should engage in these activities. And in doing so, you know, over 2000 members, we get about 600 people applying each month. It's been rapidly growing. We're looking at multiple cities now, including LA, London, Paris, and Israel. With just opportunities to open up and build this there. We're building out our franchise model we just did our first round of fundraising. It's crazy. It's hard to describe how much the market needed this and how much they've responded to it.

7:54
How do you select from your applicants and then how do you onboard them to your consent rules? And any other rules you have in place

8:01
also been what's a little curious? What's application process even look like? Yeah, I've never had to apply for a sex club. Is this more? This is more serious than a Tinder profile, I'm guessing.

8:12
Oh, yeah, it's way more serious. And it's in your profile. You know, for most places, it's really anyone can go. So there's not really an application process. The people that you're around can be just random people. There's a lot of like smaller private play groups that have a curated group, but it's mostly people who are either part of that Burning Man camp or like kind of just swingers who swing with them. For us the application process goes through a lot. We have a group members called the council They are the ones who kind of observed members at the events to see how they're behaving and how they're interacting. beforehand. The Counselor reviews all the membership applications people provide their social media profiles, they provide ultimate fantasies, they provide what they're into. There's over 46 things they can choose from it's you know, men, women, non binary trans like literally everyone's allowed to apply. Enjoy And we have all that representation within our club, which is great. When they give us their ultimate fantasies, it lets us know about what they're trying to accomplish, where they are in their sexual journey. And what they're trying to do, when they give us how they identify, lets us know, like on the scale, in a sense of Kinsey scale, but a little bit more advanced, exactly where they are in the spectrum of sex and how much they're gonna enjoy the experience or how they're going to interact with it. And then they share how they can contribute, which is really great. Because you get lawyers, you get people who are very influential in a lot of things, you get people who have wealth and other things. But you also get artists you get creatives, you get people who are want to add to the process of what we're doing. So we have a better understanding of them. When we look through their social media profiles. The main things we're looking at is based off of a couple points of attraction that we've identified. So physical attraction, that's the obvious one. If someone's physically attractive, that's great. It's you know, it helps if they are not and there's other things that we point to for attraction that includes their career, like what they are doing in their lives. Do they travel a lot? Do they have a large circle of friends? Are they married or single, you know, do They seem like someone who dates a lot that always goes into the process of it. And then artists, creatives, people who are actually doing work that's always a positive. So we look forward to having that

10:09
as well. This is more intense in the last few job interviews. So I'm already envisioning the council wearing robes. Like head to toe like the manners just in the quarters of the club watching people. Yes, yes. Taking notes

10:24
not like that. I mean, it's like it's missing. I'm sorry, it's out It seems like that. It's it's just wording it's marketing jumbo

10:31
asking for references. Yeah, if you

10:32
have a member reference that helps you get in a lot faster, because then we have someone we can go to but like, hey, should this person be here?

10:37
Oh, I was gonna go with my like, second grade art teacher. Oh, yeah.

10:40
If you can provide a reference letter of any previous

10:43
text with your second grade.

10:46
Not in second grade, mind you just ever. As an adult, it's not on my bucket list. But now I'm like, shut up.

10:55
And she looked back to see that virus was.

10:57
Yeah. So what's your acceptance rate? For just, you know, a non connected application just through the website or whatever you're using,

11:05
when we initially started accepting three, it was around 10% of those who applied, we've increased it just because it's getting to be such a much wider base and so many more people are applying. Also, it's like, it's almost like people know, in a sense that they shouldn't apply, you know, so it seems like more people who are applying are within that category of the person we're looking for. It's mainly millennial audience, like our average age is 28. So a lot of people who are older probably won't apply. If they're more involved in like the kink scene or other things they might not apply. Like, there's, it's interesting, because like we're building and initially it was like, hard to determine who made sense to come in. But now because there's so much visibility, it's the people who should be here who are responding and the people who should be here who are coming to us. So I think that's been really, really encouraging to like, have a higher acceptance rate.

11:52
So do you send a letter of rejection?

11:54
Yeah, well, we send a letter of rejection and we make suggestions on other places that they might be able to go on their sexual journey and places that are better fit For them, we try to provide them, you know, resources to find what they're looking for. We don't want to stunt anyone's sexual experience or stunt their sexual journey. So at times, we'll be like, oh, here's suggestions. And we also have done articles on other places to go to and check out and things that are more party focused. But yeah, within NSW because of how the community is, and just knowing who's in the room, like you kind of know who makes sense to have in a sense, like, if you can't have a good conversation with someone, you probably shouldn't sleep with them. And if you're like someone who just looks like someone who you wouldn't want to talk to, it's gonna be harder to see if anyone wants to have sex with you. So this is probably not the best place. I'm

12:36
sorry, Louie ck, you can't be in there.

12:41
Yeah, exactly. I mean, that's another thing. It's like trying to find that type of information. You never know with people, you know.

12:46
So what's your normal like, for all the cold applications you receive? What's the most common reason for you to say now,

12:53
wait two people ever send fake photos or fake applications

12:56
data happens to we noticed that sometimes where it's like, there's only one photo On a social profile and like we can't get additional information, and we don't accept those people, like if we can't get enough information from you, you just get a rejection. And yeah, we make it very clear. Like we're going to need to look through stuff to know a little bit more about you and not just have random strangers here.

13:14
But sorry, going back to Allison's question, what's the most common reason that you would probably reject someone?

13:19
lack of information of them online?

13:21
When you have information? What would be the most common reason? Like if you have a full obligation with everything you need? What's your normal reject? I mean,

13:29
I think it comes down to since there's six different things we're looking at, if like two or three of those things aren't fitting, then it doesn't make sense. So it could be someone who is older, but they are, you know, someone who travels and is more successful or as a part of a creative scene, or it could be someone who is a little bit more overweight, you know, deemed in a sense, like possibly unattractive but there's other factors to them, that make them interesting that make them worth being there that can provide that conversation. The most common one again, is not having enough information on them. Or they're answering questions in a really like weird way where it's like, I want to fuck bitches. You know, like if you're just saying that for your reasons join a sex club, you're probably not going to get in.

14:12
Or, like bitches

14:13
get money.

14:14
Yeah, for being exactly. Or I'd say that's one of the things I mean, if you're avid Trump supporter, probably not.

14:24
I'm sure that it also gets to a point where you're like, they're creative, but not in a way that we want. So they sing they play a musical instrument, but they listed the kazoo.

14:32
Yeah, it's like you start looking through and you're

14:34
typically the funeral kazoo.

14:36
Ooh, a few funeral

14:40
that might work at the bed. Working sick that kazoo. That's the question. Know how many events a month Do you host so we do for a week. So it's about 20 minutes per month. And then we do a lot of like speaker panels type things. On this week we're doing the pro sex rally, or our goal is to introduce a new bill into New York City Congress to protect the rights of the sexually exploited that's what the pro sex. So we are drafting our bill the rally is a way to inform people I don't think a lot of people realize how much discrimination they can experience based off of their sexual experiences. You know, they don't realize that you know, if you are part of a sex club that could be potential for you to not get a raise not get hired not succeed or your job. If you are polyamorous and live in a triad, it might be a reason why you don't get housing reason why you can't find a place to live. If you were former porn star and you're trying to get a new career. It's the reason why you can't get hired. A lot of these stories happen regularly. There's usually lawsuits that are associated with it, but they kind of died down or get settled. But we believe that there should be a law that protects that, you know, just like you have laws protecting LGBTs you should have laws that are protecting kinky people and poly people and you know, people who are comfortable being naked, you know, you shouldn't be discriminated against because, you know, your news Leaked

15:55
makes complete sense. I mean, I feel like everybody has a naked photo of themselves on their phone at one point or another

16:01
90% of millennial women have naked photos on their phone 90% like everyone is taking nudes, everyone is sending nudes. Everyone has this out there, you know, will this impact their careers? If it comes out? will it impact their careers? If it's shared at the office? What type of behavior happens at that point? And what actual protections you have, you have none. People don't have any protection against that type of stuff, which is why companies are allowed to discriminate. And that's what we're trying to raise awareness for right now.

16:26
That's awesome. So Bill is just in the early stages. So you said

16:30
so we have a couple of members who are lawyers who are helping us with the drafting of it some that are associated with Lambda Legal so we're hoping we can get their team on board. The Pro sex rally this week is like our first big announcement of it. We just launched I'm pro sex org, which goes into what we're trying to accomplish. We have some amazing speakers, including Sophie St. Thomas acnezine, Remy Duran, just a lot of people who are writers and journalists and already talking about sex in a big way. We have Christina from guys. We thought we have horrible decisions, Mandy from horrible decisions is coming on. So we're trying to get these voices to To not only talk about what is the status of sex, where are we right now? And what's happening, but also, how do we live shamelessly? How do we get to a point where the shame that's associated with sex is removed from people and they can actually live a life that doesn't feel so shitty all the time, you know, and doesn't feel so judgmental all the time. And every decision you make around sex is not like a constant flow of negative feelings. So, yeah, that's the purpose of it. That's what we're trying to do.

17:26
It's funny because people don't realize how much stigma you know, even in liberal cities that, you know, people involved in sex work, even those that weren't even naked themselves. You know, we have had stories on the show where people moved from LA and being producers, editors, writers to New York, and they can't get jobs, you know, in their respective fields because they wrote or edited porn. Yes. And had to make up resumes. It's ridiculous.

17:53
I mean, I think that's the main issue. I think people view all these things and enjoy all these things, and absorb all Sounds like people watch porn, everyone pretty much watches porn, you know, like you're enjoying it. But when it comes to the performers, when it comes to the people who are associated with the industry, you're treating them like lesser people. It's like you enjoy the benefits while you get to make them suffer. That sounds pretty bad. So yeah, it's just seeing something wrong in the world and feeling like there's a way that we can collectively get something done. And with 2000 members and the types of people we have, we feel like the influence of our community is enough to at least get more people talking about it.

18:27
So you keep mentioning shame. And you mentioned much earlier on that having a religious background has helped you and your work what you're doing now. How has that impacted you? And when you were in this religious background, did you feel shamed about your sexuality? Was there some sort of awakening you went through?

18:42
I would say this definitely an awakening. I was raised Jehovah's Witness. I'm like third generation. So my grandmother was a witness. My mom was Jehovah Witness her whole life and then I was Jehovah Witness from birth. It's a fairly strict religion where you really do follow the doctrines of the Bible, but you also aren't allowed to masturbate. You're not allowed to experience any sort of sexual pleasure until you're ready. married.

19:00
Wait, what? Hold on. I didn't know about the non masturbation thing.

19:03
Oh, yeah, yeah, masturbation is one of the worst things you can do. You're supposed to report anytime you have feelings for masturbation. So you're constantly telling these older men like, Hey, I wanted to masturbate last night. And it's really weird when you're 12. And talking about that. So

19:15
have you done that? Did you have to do that?

19:17
Yeah, I had to do that. Totally. Oh, God. It was it was awful. It was very difficult. I remember like, one of my first sexual experiences was with a friend of mine, Bobby, we were playing like x men toys. And he taught me how to suck and Suck my cock. And it was just like, this whole thing. And it felt very, like whatever, you know, normal ish. And I remember telling my parents about it and having to go through the whole process of going to the elders and talking to them about this experience. And I'm like 14 years old, and they basically rebuke you and then they do an announcement in the congregation that you no longer have privileges and then no one can talk to you. So it's this constant group decision that we're going to make everyone feel as ashamed as possible about their sex and their sexuality. And you know, not even going to the fact that I was bisexual. I'm going to the back that Stuff like that it's just this constant, you're always in a state of shame. And it forces you to connect back to those people and connect to that congregation and feel like that's the only place you can be. Outside of that you don't have birthdays, you don't have any celebrations of holidays, you can't associate with anything that's, you know, religious or political. So you're not, you're not, you know, singing the national anthem at school, you're not allowed to associate with anyone outside the religion because everyone's kind of seen as worldly. So you are stuck with only the people within there who are just very much so self policing, and really self policing in a way that keeps you restricted. And I found that, you know, most of the people who are associated with very hardcore religions live a very restrictive life. They're repressed, you know, there's a oppressiveness to how they live and how they have to act. And I felt that everyone outside of that felt very expressive, like they were able to be free, they were able to share what they wanted. But yeah, when I finally left the religion, it was difficult. You know, it was difficult to kind of go into the World Without any knowledge about sex, like, I forged my mom's signature so I could take sex ed in like Middle School, like I was so desperate for a sort of information.

21:02
Yeah, I have to get anything signed. We just took it from Los Angeles, I guess. They're definitely different. Yeah, I

21:09
had to get it totally forged my mom's signature for to be allowed to take sex out in fifth grade. And it was, it was important. It was like it's the information you need.

21:17
So you're saying you wouldn't recommend being a Jehovah's Witness?

21:21
You wouldn't recommend you know, not touching yourself.

21:24
Yeah, I would not suggest not touching yourself.

21:26
Oh, wait, actually a counterpoint to that. I had a boyfriend way back in the day who was raised very Catholic, and he was not allowed to touch himself. And so he would masturbate by humping a pillow or a sleeping bag. From the time he started masturbating onwards. So his ass was steel.

21:44
Like just perfect. And silver lining silver linings. Yes. Good stuff.

21:50
Speaking of repressed religious shit, Are you guys familiar with what sub segments of ultra Orthodox Judaism do when it comes to underwear? No. Who. So after a woman has her period, she has a certain amount of days, I think it's seven or 10 days where her discharge has to, after that period of time be a certain color and size. And if it's the wrong color in size, so bear in mind during your period, you can't touch the males in the household. So if you have a son, you can't hug him. If you have a husband, you can't touch him. And you can't do it during that period after your period as well by the end, so you have to actually take your panties and send them to a rabbi. And if you can mail them to a rabbi, you could give it to the Rabbi's wife or he has a special mailbox for it. Oh, gosh.

22:43
How big is this mailbox? Like cuz

22:45
there's gonna be a lot of women. There's just

22:48
a rally with a whole bunch of like, just stained discharged. What like, what are they collecting in the underwear? They just give them the underwear.

22:55
What? Yeah, and if it's not the right color or size Or texture or whatever, they have to restart this whole like seven or 10 day waiting period before again, they could touch their sons or husbands, I'm pretty

23:07
sure if we can get those panties, we can launch a site and sell them. I feel like that would be a good way of thinking like

23:12
decoration like hanging from phone poles and stuff back to work.

23:17
How do we find these mailboxes? What to do? If you are an Orthodox Jewish woman somehow listening to the show and mail your panties, email us info to girls and Mike, we want to know, please let us know

23:30
that religion is it's a little nuts sometimes. But I think it does good things to like, I feel like one of the things I definitely took away from you know, being in such a close knit community for so long is that feeling of wanting a community and I think without that, the amount of times that you experience church or anything else, like it's continuous, you're constantly studying, you're constantly learning. So I think for me, it's definitely instilled a desire to learn and to really gain a full knowledge of the things I'm talking about from as many perspectives as possible. I was trained for a very early age to teach people why their religion was wrong, which is not the most difficult thing to teach people, which is very difficult thing to teach people. I mean, like you, you learn about when you're studying, you're setting about, you know, Hinduism and Buddhism and Catholics and everyone else, you're learning about how they think and what they think, and how to use the Bible to convince them otherwise, how to get them away from that thinking and how to change their thinking. So I think I appreciate that, you know, being able to even when I didn't believe in something, convince someone that it was true. And now I have something I actually believe in. So it's much more gratifying when I'm able to convince someone that this is not a bad thing. And sex is not bad and weed is not bad. And all these rules that have been established around it Really do come from a place of shame.

24:42
I'm sorry, but the millennials are injecting the marijuana so how can we ever trust them? Going back to sex clubs, I have questions about Well, a lot of things about you know what goes on in them or how to prep yourself going to one or even the cleanup crew What does that look like? How much do you pay them?

25:02
You get paid really well.

25:05
Paid really well

25:05
what dissolves lube best?

25:09
Having a lot of extra sheets, like you just throw out the sheets. No, I think if you're thinking about attending a club, all the clubs have like different rules, you want to find a club that has a very clearly stated consent policy and a way in which you can report things that are happening that might not make you feel comfortable. You want to make sure you know who the organizers are. For most millennials, you know, they don't really go to sex clubs, you know, it's not like a thing they want to and some of them do go to certain places, but it tends to be a one and done type audience. So go once and never go again. They did the experience, they had a bad experience or you're not the greatest experience. It's not on their bucket list anymore. So they kind of move on from that and you know, go the path of monogamy and stuff like that. I would say that. You want to make sure the place how you're going to save, you want to make sure that you're ready for that. If they have you know, pages on fetlife. If they have pages on other places, look at some of the people who are going It's always suggested to go with someone always try to have someone with you, it's almost impossible for women to go to sex clubs alone. So it's kind of a situation where you know, you do want to have a friend with you.

26:10
Why is that? I was gonna say I haven't had any problem going to sex clubs alone.

26:14
Oh, I'm saying like for some of the just like other places like it might not feel, I don't know and I don't feel safe. If you're going your first time you're going solo, like we always suggest, bring a friend even here we say like, Hey, you know, definitely, we should just bring someone. I'm just so you have someone here and there's someone I know, it's just you never know, in certain situations, I think it depends on the sex level you go to if you have one that's more community focused. If you have one that's a little bit more open about the consent policies. If you have ones that are run by women, which is ideal, you're going to find that a lot of that stuff is covered and you feel safer in those places. But if you're going to have more established clubs that have been around for a while and probably have a different audience, you might not feel as safe. So it's really about just researching the club and getting to know who might be there and some of the people you don't want to be Just go so low and just not really have that connection. We have a whole private community so members can connect to each other beforehand, a seeking section where they can say like, Hey, I'm going for my first time as anyone else going, and they start connecting before talking to each other and then getting to know each other even before they set foot inside the club, which helps alleviate some of that stress. Dress Code wise, we always suggest three layers. So there's the alpha that you come in, that eventually comes off. We always suggest robes, have something that you can cover yourself with. Keep track of your underwear, make sure you have a place where you're leaving stuff and you can go back to it because it gets really kind of crazy when we have to return stuff. And we're like, I don't know if it's

27:37
under where it is anywhere as you never know. Do you have a coat check for underwear?

27:41
No, just have a general coat check. Do you

27:43
have lockers set up as I've been to clubs with lockers

27:46
we don't have locker setup but we do have shelving and we do have like places where people can leave their stuff. We might eventually go through have lockers because like the where we have the check in and people leave this up. There is always someone there we have on nymphs basically these women And men dressed in white, who are there to protect the space. So they do door check and they do the bar, they kind of make sure everyone's good. If anyone ever has a problem, you can go to an infant ask them for help, but they also like watch the bags and stuff like that. So people aren't worried about losing stuff.

28:16
You mentioned three layers. So I assume three is like code for you know, it's like Alright, so you got your outer you've got your normal and maybe like launch, right? What about like, if you piled on clothing as if you were trying to sneak clothes through an airport?

28:29
That's totally fine. Do that. Yeah, just like keep

28:31
your seven t shirt off.

28:33
Yes, like slowly. It's like a very long striptease as you're just pulling your hair out.

28:38
We'll get there eventually.

28:42
Like before close it's like you're finally naked.

28:44
took seven hours. Can you walk us through what it would be like for someone you just accepted a first time sex club first time member, their first experience like they have a particular night you'd recommend they come on like will they be guided through or they just kind of kicked it of this pond and being like cool have fun swimming.

29:02
Nope totally kicked in. Now we do an event called send noobs send news is dedicated to all newbies. I teach a class in that called How to ask for sex, which is focused on teaching members enthusiastic consent. We also have a code of conduct, which goes into how we all should behave NSFW and what we're expecting from each other while we're here. The how to ask for sex class is, first of all focus on like, why it's so difficult for us ask for sex, why we're so afraid to vocalize the things we want sexually covering everything from rejection to the lack of consent culture and porn to religious upbringing and fear of like the feelings that we have. And then it goes into how to practice enthusiastic consent and how to make it sexy and how to make it interesting. And then members have an opportunity to share some of their sex stories. They have an opportunity to try out what we're teaching and start asking people for simpler things like you know, massage your hand or touch or things like that. And that kind of leads people into having more of those conversations during sexual activities. The other thing is like we do talk about consent culture. lot at NSFW. So the house rules are respect hydrate, don't be a creeper. hydrate is an obvious one, you know, keep your mind sane and keep yourself aware. Like Don't be overly intoxicated Don't be, you know risks anyone who's at the club house respect is all about consent and understanding the respect of others of understanding people's privacy, you know, not kind of being someone who's revealing anyone in any way. And then don't be a creeper. Any creeper activities that would make someone uncomfortable is what that falls under. After each event, we send out a creeper report. So we allow members to report anyone that made them feel uncomfortable during the event. And then we respond and for every type of report, we have a certain response that needs to be had. So from the more serious stuff which is complete expulsion, and you know, anything we have to do with police or anyone else like that, like really supporting anyone who experiences that which hasn't happened. Thank god to like some of the lighter stuff where it's like, oh, this woman touched me without asking and like Grab my boob, you know, it's like the most recent ones that we've had a lot of women on women type stuff where women feel very comfortable touching someone without asking and not really seeing that, you know, you have to ask everyone just because you're the same gender doesn't mean it's okay for you to touch someone and disrespect their autonomy. So, yeah, it's a big range of stuff. We've had like smaller things where it's like, this person found me on Instagram. It's like, okay, like,

like, I don't know. Yeah, we try our best.

31:28
You mentioned for people to stay hydrated Do you offer water bottles or have a snack machine actually do great as far as snacks if I bring a snack Do I have to bring enough for everyone?

31:42
For haystacks? I mean, we have. We have some snacks and foods available here like there's usually either fruit or some little bites and things. We have tons of water available. We try to keep everyone hydrated tons of like mixers and stuff like that. Wait,

31:54
what is orgy food is crunchy

31:57
food, like bites like bites is a rover or jif I mean, I've been to orgies where someone's mom made rigatoni like it was like a really weird one like there's just like they had a whole buffet. I was just like watching all these people who like I probably wouldn't want to have sex with just eating from the buffet and like kind of going through and I'm just like this is this is not sexy wises athlete. It's a different type of environment. I think I but yeah, no cheeses, no garlic. Oh, wait, nothing that makes your breath smell bad. No onions. Like keep away from things like that. You want to have smaller bite type foods. Trader Joe's has a whole bunch of options for stuff like that if you're doing something at home and trying to host your own, but yeah, stay away from anything that would affect someone's breath. For fruit juices go things like pineapple, fresh berries and fruits even like whole slices of pineapple are great because those who just help and enhance the experience also affects the taste of your vaginal fluids and terminal fluids, which is nice.

32:51
Yeah, that's about it. So I'm hearing don't bring pineapple on pizza to an orgy or do

32:56
not not you can bring the pineapple leave the pizza.

Sara from dairy no dairy caught my cause gas like you never know I don't know you have to like be very aware I would stay away from cheeses we stay away from garlic we stay away from onions we stay away from anything that will have that impact chilies are good though like things that are natural projects are good

33:14
don't bring the cancer like refried beans

33:18
leave those at home once I had a lovely foursome with these three guys and beforehand I was really tired and I drank a coffee and a mountain dew bad idea. Don't do that.

I learned yes really late and I had to drive was

fine. It wasn't fine. It was not fine. It was definitely not fine.

33:42
Coffee and Mountain Dew so I assumed separate not together.

33:46
No it was like I had a coffee before I drove down and then halfway down I had stopped for gas and I was like I'll just get a mountain dew cuz I'm so tired and then it was just like this is horrible. This is the worst. I had a great night anyhow, but it was definitely not the best Food choice and then I called one of my exes and I was like, why did this happen? And he was like, cuz you're an idiot. And I was like, Okay, that makes sense.

34:08
I feel like eventually I should come out with a listicle of appropriate orgy foods. So pigs in a blanket. Yay, nay. Okay, so those are a pass. Yeah, you

34:17
can you can do I think the list is a great idea. People need to know people need to know they don't think about these things. They're like, Oh, we're gonna host an orgy at our house. Let's like do this and then everyone's bloated and they made too big of a meal and no one's a fuck yeah, you have to be very aware like you want to give them enough energy to get through the night and a couple hours but not too much energy, whether authority sick and tired.

34:36
And you also want to keep track of like finger food, the sugar Enos the oil of it, are you gonna have to wash your hands? Are you going to give someone a yeast infection if you are if you don't do it fully, like I prefer, like things you can get on toothpicks. That's great. So you just pick it out. You don't have to touch the food or one bite, you're done.

34:54
I do eventually want to do a cooking book or more of like a hosting book, like how to host a sex party. And I'd be like, you know, hosting For threesomes, foursomes and more Sims and it just be like, how to set up your home how to like do all the things that you want to create is a great title kind of like the guide to like hosting your own sex parties. Because it just there is a lot you learn within this phase but especially with this type of thing, like more people are interested in it. People ask me all the time, like, Oh, I want to host my own even members are regularly like hosting their own things. So yeah, I feel a guidebook would be really great.

35:24
How about BYOD bring your own toys that a thing that's encouraged.

35:27
Yeah, that's encouraged. That's definitely a thing. I mean, we have some, like, impact toys that are available because they're not insertion toys. So it's like, easy to have them here. But yeah, always bring your own toys. And I would say the one thing that we get asked for the most is like pegging devices, like everyone wants to peg or like every woman Oh, not everyone, but like a lot of women want to like have the strap ons and like run around the house and like play with other women. So bring your own pegging devices.

35:52
Okay, so I know that you know, you can't divulge stuff that happens within your club, obviously, but you know, you Have a history now of going to sex clubs and you know you to Allison, what are some of the craziest or most interesting or fascinating things that you guys have ever seen? I don't know or experience I've heard about a clown sex orgy at this point. So

36:12
yeah, there's definitely a context for it. I mean, I think it's a it's interesting like i've you know, had women who like walk in they're specifically looking for gangbanger like I'm here to have a gangbang. And it's like, okay, and you just like kind of see them, like just really approaching people and be like, you, you you and just like going for that type of thing. That sounds so nice. I went to another party where this guy was getting fisted by his girlfriend and she was like, had gloves on was missing him and he was holding a little mirror with his feet, so you can see it. So he was like, kind of positioning itself and like looking at what she's doing.

Yeah, it was it seemed very dangerous.

36:49
Wasn't there someone around who could hold it for him?

36:51
Right, you know, but they were like on the bed doing their thing.

36:54
This is why friends help.

36:56
It's like, hey, can someone hold this mirror while I get tested? That was interesting. When I do a big birthday party called All Saints Day. It's a sack religious celebration where everyone is required to dress religiously. So you get to see things like, you know, Rabbi, you know, fucking someone in a job, you get to see lots of Catholic people getting together and fucking you get to see like everyone in costume kind of, you know, living out a lot of good press feelings and being okay with it. So that one's always interesting. And we hope that you know, once a year, it's about 300 400 people. And yeah, it's just like a big birthday celebration, but also like this big massive performance type thing. So I think there I've definitely seen some of the most interesting things because everyone's in costume and you're like, Okay, this is crazy. But you have someone like dresses a Buddha like giving head to, you know, some dude in a Mormon outfit.

37:48
Of course, someone there is like, No, I have to represent all religions. So they put on a call lander on their top of the head, as opposed to farion

37:56
Yeah, I mean, we have, there's like witches as people dressed. Like Jedi eyes. It's an Jedi is an actual religion. So that's fine. Is it? Yeah, it's a tax free organization. You can be an official Jedi and believe in middle kondia and like the whole Jedi practice, and it's a tax free organization.

38:14
I've met the guy who runs the church of bacon. Yeah.

38:18
So I don't believe it's tax free. I think I was more of like, are you see nonprofit? I think

38:22
it might be a non profit. I know you could definitely get ordained as a minister to marry people.

38:27
Yeah, there's

38:28
there's also dude ism. That's a new one that came out. Yes. Off the dude from The Big Lebowski. God, I hate that movie. Yeah.

38:37
Hey, the porn parody of it was fantastic.

38:40
I hope it was better than the movie. Actually. Yes.

38:43
That's what I figured. Let's see what other crazy churches are there. I'm looking for church of cannabis. That's another one that's out there. There's that one evangelical church that believes everyone should they get married to the AK 47 are there the assault rifles, that's one and there's also one that does Let's look it up. There's someone actually dressed up like that for the last All Saints say they like wear these sashes and they take photos with their rifles and it's like a whole church like blessing because they brought their rifles to church. I think it's really I don't want to

39:13
have a pin that says NRA on it.

39:17
There's a lot of crazy religious things out there that just get away with a lot of bad things for the most part,

39:25
then Tom Cruise strolls in because he has to rep Scientology,

39:29
Tom Cruise's that the orgy

39:31
that's a downer. And then we've got like Eyes Wide Shut happening, and it's so bad times for everyone.

39:37
So as far as the themes, I love the concept of themed orgies. And I was trying to think to myself, if I had an orgy, how would I want to themed and I don't know, I mean, I tried coming up with some but I don't know if I could ever run them by me. Maybe Daniel, you can like for example, you can have a group of people having sex in an elevator called the up and coming club. That's hard.

40:01
They only get the amount of time they have to go up and down the elevator to get their stuff go

40:05
and help her in a tall building or a very short one depending on their company.

40:10
Let's see what the Empire State buildings up to if we can rent the elevator for a night.

40:13
I'm sure you could probably do like even a Model UN themed one where you have sex from people from every different country.

40:18
I feel we're already doing that we have really good representation of people. Like it's really not everyone's

40:23
from Djibouti and Bhutan. I don't understand.

40:25
You and base one will be fun. Like we just need one for each country. The first person who rsvps for Russia gets it and the first person RSVP is for this country gets in and like just keep going down the list.

40:37
That'd be really cool. That would

40:39
be really interesting is like if you're stealing, like we're getting maybe make make that happen.

40:45
Oh, you need to do one that's all breakfast themed.

40:48
We do that Saturday morning cartoons. Oh,

40:50
it's a missed opportunity to call it The Breakfast Club.

40:52
That's good too. We used to do one where it's more of like a after hours thing. So it was like Sunday morning and we'd play like Saturday morning cartoons. And have like a whole thing of like cereal of like multiple, like every single you can imagine and like all this breakfast stuff and it would just be like chill and fuck and watch cartoons.

We don't do that anymore

41:14
Have you guys seen by the way like the Kellogg's space in Union Square?

41:18
Yeah What is I don't

41:20
know. So Kellogg's cereal company rents out this massive space which you know i would love if you could just rent it out for an orgy because it would be perfect if you continue doing those specifically themed cereal and you know cartoon ones if you ever wanted I know but I'm just saying if you want work because they have like a huge two cans, Sam in the background. They already have all the cereals there. They even have these chairs that are swings so sex swings are already

41:48
there. That's perfect. I mean, yeah, we'll contact Kellogg's I think they've you make this work.

41:53
What else are they doing?

41:56
Some cross promotion

41:57
market to the next generation.

41:59
You Do you want to get those millennials back? Remind them that they can eat cereal after sex?

42:04
What else is Count chocula? Therefore a little sucky.

42:08
Not so bad,

42:10
like, blueberry balls.

42:14
I know like it's not gonna get any better. No, no.

42:18
I like I still want to know like this moment or set of moments that made you realize that what was happening within your family's religion was not for you, and how you got over that and how long that took? I think it was Jurassic Park.

42:33
Like once I saw Jurassic Park and realize that evolution is probably real, it kind of made everything else fall apart. For a long time I was taught that dinosaur bones and other evidence of prehistoric life was just the devil putting things in the world to confuse us and to get us away from God. But after seeing Jurassic Park, I mean, I saw that T Rex, I think was real.

It was all downhill from there. Really.

pretty great. I love it dinosaurs doesn't really work with a hyper Christian religion.

43:06
Have you considered ever doing a dinosaur themed sex party?

43:11
See, this is Alice This is what I'm talking about Jurassic World triple X has been out now for like a month and a half and I was like, should we watch it? Or are we watching a porn and you were like, no, but we could have watched Jurassic World triple x for this.

Yeah, and they're in full dyno costume.

When I asked you if we were watching anything that sounds like

43:32
is there a peg us or acid? Because I haven't watched it because you were like, We don't need a porn for this one. Okay, fine. Then we'll find someone to review Jurassic Park themed porn because I need to know if there's a mega sore ass and it's I Oh, that's my favorite dinosaur.

43:51
Perfect, perfect.

43:53
A double directs.

43:54
You should really just pull up a screen grab from Jurassic World triple x, just like your company. Pull it up just look

44:01
okay Jurassic World parody Okay, that asks What if the dinosaurs were porn stars? Oh no. Look I'm only interested if there's a tricera Coxon.

44:15
Just get like a paleontologist and have them watch it

44:18
when we could just talk about it. This is amazing if you

44:21
are a paleontologist and want to review dinosaur porn With us to discuss how accurate or inaccurate it is info to here also Mike calm Alternatively if you know a paleontologist and you don't like them very much, email us or contact information. Oh and if you happen to know Jeff Goldblum or you are Jeff goldbloom we want to review this porn with you so email us info to my talk comm I would be okay to who knows Jeff gold blooms assistant Jeff gold blooms assistant if you are in Daniel st sex club.

44:54
We put this all out to you. We need you

to watch Alexa, tell us

45:01
that'd be great. Jeff Goldblum reviews Jurassic World triple except for your quality stuff.

45:05
You know, he performs in a like a jazz club in LA at least once a month. My friends go get a hit show. Just a couple weeks,

45:13
we'll be talking about the recto Saurus. Yeah, I can't stop. I'm sorry.

45:18
Okay. It's okay. You're helping me sort out my Christmas card problem. So it's this year is like, what do I do with my Christmas card a couple years ago, it was like Santa Claus, but a dick here before that it was the manger scene, but everyone was decks and this year I like I want to paint it, scan it in and then mail it out. But I don't have my full concept yet.

45:39
I'm just now picturing tons of people wearing that classic T rex costume. But with a deck hanging out like an inflatable deck

45:47
or like a real deck or what do we think a real toe?

But would it be attached to the person wearing it or would they have gotten it from something else?

45:56
It could be a cutout? Could it be like one of the bad dragon dildos Yeah,

46:02
you know, it'd be great if we could set up the the AIG one and the one that inserts the AIG but have it become like an automatic thing and you could run around in that shooting those jello eggs at people and just reloading from inside the dinosaur costume. That would be a great Easter thing for you to do Daniel, like put the egg toss but that

46:21
I think dinosaurs for Easter Make sense? Like it actually works 100% sense I used to go to a party that was just for Easter. It was like the bad bunnies club or something else like that. And it's basically you'd go through this obstacle course of things you'd have to do so one was like they'd paint your butt with easter eggs. One was like this really badass like Easter Bunny Dom who would like put you through things and like basically bunny training, you go through bunny training with like a tail on your back. And they put you in cages initially and like load you up and they're like, come up bunnies and like you go around through all these activities. It's pretty fun. You have to get all six stamps of all the activities that they do

46:59
you know I feel like easter egg hunts are kind of a newer thing that only happened like the last 1520 years I don't know or maybe I just never did it was during it when I was little. Okay, I never did it. Where'd you grow up though? New Jersey. There you go seems like a place I'm happy sir x.

47:13
No New Jersey does not get fun things.

47:18
No, we get Italian. Yeah, exactly. That's what I meant.

47:22
Sort of finding eggs. It was always finding pizza. I never understood it. It's very weird. So Daniel, where can our listeners find you find more of you or your sex club?

47:32
It's NSFW calm. That's the main site for everything. Pro sex is I'm pro sex work which is the bigger initiative that we have and that we're pushing forward now. And then I'm just Daniel st on everything I say ymt.

47:47
And Alison, thank you for joining us our guest host today. where can our listeners find you under their bed? drooling,

47:54
really erotic drooling under their bed when I'm not there, you Find me at that. mcknight.com that's midnight with ck not just to see and on Twitter occasionally also at that McKnight Well, I hope to find you under my bed drooling. Looking at you.

48:13
It's an open invitation. Oh,

48:15
is there room under there? How much room

48:19
many other people are under their hours?

48:22
What is going on? It's always Jeff Goldblum and Richard Edinburg. And what about Joseph Gordon Levitt? Fair enough? I'm under that bed.

48:31
Five minutes.

48:33
Sam Neil can be pushed to the side. No, no, I was just I just watched in the mouth of madness. He's got to stay right there.

48:39
Gonna be like one of the better afternoons

48:42
and you guys can find me Alice at rational blonde on Twitter. But you guys can always find us next week. By the way, leave us a comment or review on Twitter, iTunes, wherever you guys are listening to this and tell all your friends because you're not they need this information.

49:00
true friends, these are fuck tell them.

49:03
Quick, quick edition Daniel, where can people apply to join? NSFW

49:09
just for the website? It's like ns dash f w calm for slash join. And you can also like review. We have a bunch of our reviews and you know, people's stories and stuff I haven't shared and just like an understanding of like how big it is, in a sense, like it gets you through, and then the applications are right there.

49:25
Okay. And if you are someone who reviews his sex club, please review mostly the themes. That's what I want to know. I'm holding you up to the United Nations theme though.

49:35
I mean, I've been really thinking about the dinosaur thing for Easter. That's hilarious. Like that

49:40
would be really cool. And what's great is I think they give you an egg mold, which means you can get some plastic mosquitoes and do half the mold put the plastic mosquito and and do the other half the mold. That's pretty cool.

49:52
It's like, it's just like,

49:53
Yeah, but it's eggs and you just go around, you could fire I don't know. I love event planning. This is the thing. I do. That would be amazing.

50:02
If you're an event planner who needs a career change event plans, sex clubs, and

50:08
that's so hard. All right.

50:10
Well, guys, thanks for joining us this week. Thank you so much. Thank you. All right. Bye bye

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

Alice is joined by comedians Kate Kennedy (@KateKennedyxxx) and David Smalley (@davidcsmalley) to review what happens when you take a Bob's Burgers and turn it into a porn. We also give you burger facts, convention talk, morality & porn, Kate's dog making masturbatory noises, voiceovers in porn, and a discussion on Backpage.com 

Support us on Patreon!

Where there's a willy, there's a way! Alice is joined by past guest & co-host Silvia Saige (@silviasaigexxx) and bestselling author Josh Sabarra (@JoshSabarra) to review the modernized gay porn parody remake of the 1980's classic, "9 to 5". Support us on Patreon! 

Listen to Silvia's podcasts: 
Sexy Funny Raw

Sexual Disorientation

Snag Josh's book's: Porn Again

Alice Vaughn 0:09
Welcome to Two girls one Mic Where were the porn version of Rotten Tomatoes but instead of tomatoes it's just a dick whether or not it's flat direct either coast, Alice Vaughn, and with me, I have actually a guest co host, Silvia sage. Hey, Sylvia, how you doing today? I'm fantastic. How are you? I am so good. And for listeners of the show. You guys might remember Sylvia from one of our earlier episodes, Pulp Fiction. Yes, we had such a good time and I know some of you are asking where's the fat? Well, Yvette is actually on medical leave for the fall. So we are bringing back some of your favorite past guests, co hosts and their friends. And we have a friend today. We have Josh Sahara. Wait, am I pronouncing your name?

Josh Sabarra 0:56
Who are you got it right on the first try.

Alice Vaughn 0:58
Yes. men say the same thing to me in bed.

Josh Sabarra 1:04
And here's Silvia is the professional. Yeah. Do you have such a good track record? Oh,

Alice Vaughn 1:09
wait, are we still talking about the podcast or in bed?

Josh Sabarra 1:13
I'll leave that up to the listeners.

Alice Vaughn 1:15
People are already looking for like the Yelp of like porn and sex. Right.

Silvia Saige 1:20
What is Alice's score? I wish I had a Yelp review of sex. I'd love to read it. Oh my god. Would we

Unknown Speaker 1:26
actually want that? I would. Yeah, I heard that one.

Josh Sabarra 1:29
I mean, isn't that what Twitter is? anyway? Really?

Silvia Saige 1:33
Kinda.

Alice Vaughn 1:35
I mean, yeah, I guess for one night stance. You know what, as long as it could be anonymous, because I feel like I would definitely be able to get better anonymous scores. Yeah, anonymous is the best way to go.

Josh Sabarra 1:45
Yeah. But what would the intent be of this website with this these to improve people's sexual performance? Or would it be to because you know, people are going to use it as a way to, you know, a punitive way to treat their acts like

Silvia Saige 1:58
I say, improve sexual performance. Because it's really hard to tell somebody to their face what they've done wrong, but it's really easy to tell your friend what they did wrong. So how easy would it be to tell the Yelp of sexuality what they did wrong? And then they could go read it and be like, Ah, this whole time, I thought I was doing that right. And you're like, Oh, you're so wrong.

Alice Vaughn 2:16
I thought I like they liked it when I gave t.

Silvia Saige 2:20
This whole time. everybody's like, Oh, it's too much. Stop. Stop. Stop, stop, stop. Yeah, that's what I do when I don't like it. I'm like, Oh, it's too much stuff. Stop, stop.

Josh Sabarra 2:29
It's just too much pleasure for you to handle.

Silvia Saige 2:32
How much pleasure Yeah, you're killing me.

Alice Vaughn 2:36
But no, seriously, you're choking me too hard. I think you are killing. He almost broke my hyoid bone. Five stars felt like Cheryl marcher. Yeah.

Unknown Speaker 2:46
Five stars.

Alice Vaughn 2:48
Five stars. So, Josh, you wrote a book also called porn again? Yeah. Okay. I'm really embarrassed. You sent me a copy and I haven't opened it. Oh my

Silvia Saige 2:58
god. It's so good. You have to Read it Alice. It's like, in a day. It's addicting.

Josh Sabarra 3:03
I mean, it doesn't come with a better cover quote than that. Yeah. Definitely asking Sylvia for a blurb for my third book. You got it.

Alice Vaughn 3:12
Okay, so you have enemies closer, which is your latest right?

Josh Sabarra 3:16
enemies closer. Yes. Which is a Hollywood bitchy fiction, Jackie Collins style type book. Yeah, I wanted to be, you know, sort of a contemporary take on those books that were very popular in the 80s. Things like Judith Krantz, I'll take Manhattan or Iris Rainer Dart the boys in the mail room, sort of a contemporary throwback, if that makes sense. And that came after porn again.

Alice Vaughn 3:41
What's porn again about for our audience.

Josh Sabarra 3:43
I tell people it's basically coming of age memoir about coming. So it's about coming into yourself coming out. You know, I sort of found my footing late. I was a late bloomer. I was a virgin until I was 31 years old. I've completely made up for lost time. You know, I was somebody who made my career my focus made everything around me my focus instead of my personal life and when I finally realized what I was sacrificing and and not even living my truth, and that's sort of what the books about and sort of coming to a place where I'm comfortable with myself and having to let go of the things that were keeping me from being myself and there there are a lot of factors It was my personal life, the kinds of friends I was choosing my career plastic surgery, my looks like everything that I was using to fill myself up other than the things that I should have been. I mean, that means different things to different people, but I was not making the right choices for myself.

Silvia Saige 4:37
I don't think any of us made the right choices for ourselves. Especially in our teens, and

Josh Sabarra 4:42
I guess we know after

Unknown Speaker 4:46
Oh, in hindsight, I fucked up my 20s Yeah,

Silvia Saige 4:48
I feel like the 20s are for fucking up and then your 30s or for fixing the things you fucked up in your 20s and then in your 40s you can finally enjoy it.

Josh Sabarra 4:56
Right. My problem is though is that I know had that period of time that 16 to 25 where people are making some of these choices, right? Because I started so late, so I sort of had a delayed adolescence. So I was behaving like I was 18 when I was 35. Right. So that's sort of part of the theme of the book. Yeah. How it's never too late to sort of step into your own skin.

Alice Vaughn 5:21
Oh, yes. I can't wait to read it. I hope

Unknown Speaker 5:25
you will.

Alice Vaughn 5:26
And I will link it in the show notes. So our audience can also read it right. So that's it. How did you meet Sylvia? It seems like you know, a lot of people in porn, and I know a lot of people in porn, but why do you know people in porn?

Josh Sabarra 5:38
Well, it's interesting. The reason that the book is called porn, again, is sort of in the message of the book, so I don't want to ruin it for readers. I did not work in the porn industry. But there is a reason why the book is called that and the role that porn played in my sort of finding myself. Because of that, I wound up doing some radio shows and some podcasts with some great people, one of whom was Jackie St. James, whom we know and love as one of the preeminent directors of adult entertainment. And Jackie had mentioned to me one time we were at dinner, and I think she had just done a movie with Sylvia. She knows I'm very particular about people I keep around me now. She said to me, You really need to meet Silvia sage. And I said, Okay, you know, I'd love to meet her sometime. Maybe I'll come by when you're shooting. Then piers Paris, who's a friend of mine, who we're going to discuss today. He, we know because he did a photo, a promotional photo shoot with me for my book, and he and I became friends. And he and Sylvia are friends. And he and I were having dinner one night, and he said to me, you know, who you would love stage. So now we have the second person who knows me fairly well, who's telling me I need to know her. And then our other mutual friend Sean, who works on some of Jackie's movies and I believe just made his directorial debut that you're in. So yes, he did. Yeah. And he said to me, You Have to meet Silvia stage. So by the time the third person whom you owe interest tells you that you need to have somebody in your life, you need to set about making contact. And I think they know exactly how he texted me and she said, Is it okay if I just give Sylvia your number? And so I said, Of course so Sylvia texted me that day. She's like, Are you free for dinner tonight? And I'm like, it just so happens I am. And Silvia and I had a love affair began.

Silvia Saige 7:24
It's so true. You know, it's funny Alice's people were telling me the same thing, but I needed to meet this man, but I had no idea who he was. I didn't do any research. And I thought they were setting me up on a date. I had no idea that they were setting me up on like this friendship. I was like, oh, everybody keeps telling me I need to meet this guy. Like, I'm going like, let's do.

Josh Sabarra 7:49
Little did she know. Yeah, I wouldn't have it any other way. She had a penis and then I would,

Alice Vaughn 7:56
oh my god, I can't even imagine

Josh Sabarra 7:58
if she had the right anatomy. She's the Absolutely my kinda guy. Oh, thank you darling

Alice Vaughn 8:05
well that is what strap ons are for.

Silvia Saige 8:08
Right?

Josh Sabarra 8:09
I guess we can I guess there's ways to make anything work there's always a way

where there's a will a there's a way right

Unknown Speaker 8:18
man I should make that my new life motto.

Alice Vaughn 8:21
I mean it works for so many instances. Yes work yes. Mm hmm affairs maybe

Josh Sabarra 8:30
I see a T shirt and I see a two girls one Mike t shirt where there's a will there's a way

Alice Vaughn 8:36
you know I will team up on it and it'll become part of our official merchandise so I would love it. So we ended up watching and you recommended this film. And I'm actually so embarrassed to say I never watched the original so nine to five I had neither until last night.

Josh Sabarra 8:53
I know that our that the listeners that cannot see my mouth on the floor. Especially out there. With your sense of humor,

Alice Vaughn 9:01
I'm a terrible person.

Josh Sabarra 9:03
I know I'm older than both of you, but

Alice Vaughn 9:05
I'm always a child on this podcast. Actually, no, I take that back. Now that I'm interviewing some younger porn stars. I'm not always the young one on the show. I

Josh Sabarra 9:14
was actually alive for the theatrical release of nine to five. So that puts anything in perspective.

Alice Vaughn 9:21
And it came out in 1980. And I have to watch it because it has Jane Fonda Dolly Parton, and I didn't realize this, but it's out of the American films Institute's hundred funniest movies. Number 74. I didn't know this.

Josh Sabarra 9:35
It was really I mean, this is one of the things Sylvie and I were discussing last night when we watch we actually watch nine to five before we watch breaking Mr. Hart, which is the adult film we're going to discuss. Yeah, it's interesting how ahead of its time the movie was in terms of equal pay, women in the workplace, all of that is very, very clearly addressed. And that was in you know, obviously the movie came out in 1980, which means that the shot Probably in 79 is my guess. So it was very forward. And we were laughing at how some of not laughing I mean, it's laughing through the tears so to speak, because somebody we're addressing that are so pertinent. Mm hmm. I was

Alice Vaughn 10:13
reading the synopsis on Wikipedia. And you're right, because ultimately, so the premise of nine to five from what it seems like is, I mean, we're all kind of familiar with the trope of the horrible boss and how do we get back at the horrible loss and people team up to you know, enact their revenge but a nine to five, where they essentially end up doing is kind of and correct me if I'm wrong, kidnapping their boss, and then bettering their workplace

Josh Sabarra 10:39
eventually. Yeah, so the famous line from the movie is that he's a sexist, egotistical, lying, hypocritical bigot, and that's the line that they repeat in the movie multiple times.

Alice Vaughn 10:49
Yeah. Are you sure that's just not my ex boyfriend?

Josh Sabarra 10:52
Very well. Big. Maybe you were dating Mr. Hart. Their boss is this horrible man who's extremely upset. Access and he's sort of a walking me to before that movement was even, you know, in the vernacular. So essentially there comes a point where they need to kidnap him. And during that time they make the workplace a better place.

Alice Vaughn 11:14
Yeah. And what's really interesting is at the very end, this I found really interesting how they decided to tie up Mr. Hart's storyline in the original film, which is he does such a great job that he's promoted to I think like Brazil, right where eventually he's kidnapped and never heard from again. So moral of the story is murder is not always wrong. Not you're a racist.

Josh Sabarra 11:40
When you're a sexist, egotistical, lying, hypocritical bigot. Anyway, I think that also they, you know, the idea that it showed, you know, what a horrible person he was and that the advancement, but his advancement was on the backs of these women who have done the work to get him to that place, which is really the message that that I think that movie tries to drive

Alice Vaughn 12:00
Yeah, so we ended up watching breaking Mr. Hart and I, I like that they use the main villains name in the title. And so they at least carry that over and they've modernized it essentially. So the film

Silvia Saige 12:11
Yeah, they carried over a few things we were noticing last night there were a lot of nods.

Yeah, original money mainly like characters, character names and things of that nature. But I mean, the premise in general was similar, but I mean, obviously, it's not quite the same because you can't have a play of being the misogynist. They still kind of did play on that, but it's just a different way, I guess.

Alice Vaughn 12:34
But who am I to judge considering on this show? You're now a porn critic, you are to judge so three scenarios that the guys were basically stuck in that they want to enact revenge on Mr. Hart. So the first guy was interesting because Mr. Hurd essentially coerced him into having sex with him But before that, putting on a tight little white Speedo, and of course the tight little white Speedo has to come off Somehow, so they decide to go the creative route and have it essentially explode. Oh my god that is so hard. it lands on a roof. I think we

Josh Sabarra 13:10
need to run this movie back one second because before we even get to the exploding Speedo, the funniest part to me was here we have max Adonis, who is the employee and he comes in he says that he didn't bring anything to swim in. Yeah. So Mr. Hart brings out a pair of speedos, but when max takes his pants off, he's wearing basically boxer briefs. So what he's wearing is basically made for swimming.

Silvia Saige 13:39
You have to take those off, you know, put on nobody takes

Unknown Speaker 13:41
as off lately

Josh Sabarra 13:44
to put on the white Speedo so that when he kneels down, the speedo can explode on him and land on the roof. And there's so much fabric on the roof that you could rock the house

Silvia Saige 13:55
right with 20 times more material.

Alice Vaughn 13:59
Clear there's Probably what 20 exploded speedos on the roof. Two dozen of them. Right? How many ways has Mr. Hart done this? He clearly knows it works. Its power move. Right clearly, but I really appreciated the underwater nudity cam. I don't know about you guys. I did appreciate the enter button

Silvia Saige 14:17
at

Josh Sabarra 14:18
the water was a little murky.

Silvia Saige 14:20
It did need to be cleaned. But yeah,

Josh Sabarra 14:22
yeah, the pool looked like it needed a skimming.

Alice Vaughn 14:26
Where's the pool boy when you need them?

Josh Sabarra 14:28
Yeah, this was that porn movie where the pool was conspicuously absent. And then they start giving each other hand jobs underwater until they finally move to the grass. You know, outside the house, right?

Silvia Saige 14:41
Where we fast forward. Exactly. Well,

Josh Sabarra 14:43
I may have watched it again later. Or maybe

Silvia Saige 14:46
not. I was going to say now you have the link so you can go home but I was like, I don't really need to watch porn with my friend. It's just like, there comes a point where it's the insertion. I'm like, All right, we're moving on moving on.

Josh Sabarra 14:58
And also when you use No these people are you've met these people it is totally defined it is all different thing. Yeah, Paris Paris i think is is such a handsome, gorgeous strapping guy, but because I know him so well, I don't look at him in, in a sexual way at all right, right. So when I see that I find it kind of hard to, to, but we haven't gotten to his scene yet. So anyway, I don't want to ruin the story for everyone else.

Alice Vaughn 15:26
No, but I totally relate because I mean, and Sylvia you get it because you know, you become friends with people in the industry. And you know, having all these people on my show, I get to know them and become friends and we're texting and next thing you know, I see a scene where Tommy pistol in it. And I'm like, I need to see this. I know Tommy, right. And he's texting me like, he's like, Hey, Alice, can I send you like a video of me putting my dick in my butthole and I'm like, Tommy, I don't need to see that.

Silvia Saige 15:55
I love Tommy's work. The thing about Tommy's work is it's never really stuck. That's what's hilarious about it. Tommy is the only guy who does porn who doesn't make it sexy for years, and they'll never quit working. It's hilarious. He's the most comical porn person I've ever met in my entire life.

Josh Sabarra 16:14
But you know what i like Alice, that you mentioned about, you know, having friendships and relationships with people whom you've seen in these movies. And, you know, the idea that these are real people behind these performers. And you know, that's one of the things that I think Silvia works very hard to do, particularly on her podcast, you know, she works very hard to make sure that people are aware of that behind, you know, the sex worker sort of label are some wonderful, fantastic people who have a lot to offer you know, and I love that you just mentioned that that you have relationships with people in the industry because I think it's time for people to reframe their thinking a little bit o

Alice Vaughn 16:57
listeners of this podcast know that you know, porn stars are people you know, just like any other creative just like comedians, artists, musicians, just

Josh Sabarra 17:05
like any other kind of work.

Alice Vaughn 17:07
Yeah, exactly. And people should pay for their porn because I hate what the tube sites have done. I mean, we could go on tangents right now. But getting back to the review,

Josh Sabarra 17:20
yes. breaking your heart. Yes. So have we moved past the max Adonis Dean Phoenix scene?

Alice Vaughn 17:26
Pretty much we're on to the sexual blackmail scene. Okay,

Silvia Saige 17:29
recording. He recorded that and having sex in his home or in their home. I can't remember.

Josh Sabarra 17:34
Well, it looked like Missy Hart. And that was the same name from the original 95 Franklin Hart's wife was named Missy,

Alice Vaughn 17:42
do you think they cast Nina Hartley just because they were like, she has heart in her name?

Josh Sabarra 17:47
Yeah. Well, I mean, I'm sure she's lovely. But I don't think it was because she missed a role. It's Meryl Streep.

Alice Vaughn 17:56
Excuse you but Meryl Streep, you know, she was waiting For that call.

Josh Sabarra 18:01
I know, I know who she really wanted breaking Mr. Hart and I think between Big Little Lies season two, there just wasn't time probably.

Silvia Saige 18:10
I think they probably wanted somebody that was familiar with the movie and kind of could give it a good omnipage because I don't think a lot of younger girls would have even known of the movie, you know. So I think it was the entry

Josh Sabarra 18:24
looks great, by the way, right? I mean, and I joke, I mean, she did a great job. And she definitely tipped her hat or wig or whatever, to Marian Mercer who played that character in nine to five. I thought it was great to sort of see her that way. Yeah, it was fun. And then an actual roll like that is fun. Yeah,

Alice Vaughn 18:44
I always love it. When porn stars have non sexual roles just for the fun of picking up acting

Silvia Saige 18:49
ideal time.

Josh Sabarra 18:50
You just want to warn Sylvia you just want to go and get that category.

Silvia Saige 18:55
I just love being on the gay porn sets. They are so much better than being on straight. porn sets and I have so much fun there. So anytime they're like, actually, I'm doing an extra for men calm tomorrow I work as an extra for them like all the time and for dirt change. They pay me nothing and I show up like yay.

Alice Vaughn 19:12
So there's my question which sets us more lube? Oh god straight or gay porn. It's gotta be gay. It's gotta be, is it? I don't know.

Josh Sabarra 19:25
I can't answer that. I think

Silvia Saige 19:27
so. Because at least with us on straight sets, there's a lot of spit. I know there's a lot of spin on gay porn too, but I just feel like because it's all anal over there. It there's just a lot more loose on us gay porn said it's probably always necessary whereas on a porn site, it's not necessary all the time. Fair. Yeah, unless you're me and you haven't dried out Lizzie and then it is always.

Alice Vaughn 19:53
Sometimes you wake up feeling like sandpaper.

Josh Sabarra 19:56
I would not imagine that because whenever I see you, you look so hard to graded.

Silvia Saige 20:00
Oh, thank you. I think I have a home to hydration just stops at my face and then

Josh Sabarra 20:08
like here it just it just hasn't worked its way down.

Silvia Saige 20:12
I know somebody told me other day they're like you need to change your diet. I was like I have like the world helping us diet. I don't know what else I could do. I just think it's age. So age just catches up and just pulls out the moisture from your PC. That's just what

Josh Sabarra 20:29
I can't even speak to that.

Alice Vaughn 20:32
You know, we need to get an aesthetician on the show and be like Look, I know about moisturizing and hydrating the face. What do I do down there? right we do

Josh Sabarra 20:39
you know there is a procedure that's I'm sure they have this in New York. I'm sure it's all over but the the J shell. Have you heard of those stuff? No vaginal facials.

Silvia Saige 20:48
I don't know about this one. My vagina eautiful it doesn't need like dip hopping.

Josh Sabarra 20:53
I can't speak to it because I don't have the anatomy nor the interest but I would say to look that up because I know some people who have gone for it's like I don't know the exact procedure but it basically is like the attention that you get on a facial but in your

Alice Vaughn 21:11
vagina. Wow. So from a quick search, it looks like it's the quote revitalizing 20 minute treatment is meant to be done post bikini wax to aid the removal and prevention of ingrown hairs and acting while smoothing the skin and treating discoloration. So, Silvia is still gonna have a tripod See, I don't have any of that my vaginas, gorgeous outside.

Josh Sabarra 21:32
I think it depends on where you go. Yeah, Alice, I think they offer more extensive services at other places. That sounds like an express magician,

Silvia Saige 21:41
and express.

Alice Vaughn 21:44
Can there be a drive to have a j show?

Josh Sabarra 21:46
Clearly Silvia needs the full 60

Silvia Saige 21:48
right. I need a full dream.

Josh Sabarra 21:50
She wants the mask and everything.

Silvia Saige 21:53
The hydration mask that's

Alice Vaughn 21:57
how do I get the dollar menu facial or vision What's that look like?

Silvia Saige 22:03
No way. All the money on your vagina. There's a new song out right now and it's like talks about like counting the money and he hears that sound He's like, ever since the check came in, like, do you know what I'm talking about? a rap song? Never mind.

Unknown Speaker 22:17
No way our audience might know.

Josh Sabarra 22:20
You know who you're talking to. I mean, I'm listening to share.

Silvia Saige 22:26
You were listening to some vinyl album this morning that when I was like loving Yeah,

Josh Sabarra 22:30
Rita Coolidge all time high, which was the theme song from speaking of vaginas, it was the theme song from Octopussy was the James Bond movie in 1983. Right? We have also not yet well, we can watch that Roger Moore and Ron Adams. I'm totally dating myself, but I'm fine with that.

Silvia Saige 22:51
Doesn't he look like he's in his 20s I love how he says he dates themselves and he still looks like he's fucking 22 year when

Josh Sabarra 22:57
my references are from for both of you are born. combined.

But I have avoided Alice, the vinyl craze. And then it sort of hit me because the nostalgia factor like I started, I'd be in a store and I'd see these records that I had as a kid. And I was seven or eight years old sitting in my room listening. I mean, what seven or eight year old is sitting in their room listening to read a Coolidge all time high. But I was. And so I have gone on this mission to sort of find any of the things I don't still have to find him by the records that I had in the 80s.

Alice Vaughn 23:32
I love it, or the late 70s. Is there a holy grail of records you're still looking for?

Josh Sabarra 23:37
I've found sort of all of it. One of the ones I looked for for a while was the kids from fame, which was a TV show based on the movie fame. And they did an album with kids from fame. Took me a minute, but I haven't now so everything's okay in the world. Your collections complete.

Isn't it neat? Do you think like elections Complete. I have thingamabobs galore.

Silvia Saige 24:03
Don't make me because I'll start singing that song and it will not be good.

Josh Sabarra 24:07
I feel like I got so off track because we were talking about I think it was the blackmail scene with Remy Cruz and goodie box. Um, you also have no right so yeah, I don't know him but you know, I know ramie but I don't know what he

Silvia Saige 24:22
I know what he he's great. He's no longer in pornography, but he's a fantastic human being. I don't think Remy

Unknown Speaker 24:27
is either. Yeah.

Silvia Saige 24:28
And what he's circlet in Las Vegas. So if you had to Las Vegas, you're seeing the search show. There might be your boy. Flexibility comes in handy. Yeah, it does. It was a good hot scene, though. I will say that would have been a scene that like I would watch. It was really hot between the two of them.

Josh Sabarra 24:48
I agree. I mean, there was a little bit of a blackmail scenario and in the original nine to five, but this sort of took it to a different level, right? I mean, that that part of the plotting is totally totally off.

Silvia Saige 25:01
Right? They all needed to have something against Mr. Hart. Like he had, you know,

Josh Sabarra 25:06
yeah, but one thing I should also say is props to dp wells who wrote and directed this movie because he clearly has an affinity for the source material because even the artwork the key art for the movie, it looks exactly like the car from the original nine to five

Silvia Saige 25:25
poster.

Josh Sabarra 25:26
I know right because it when we talk a little later about some of the things that they threw in there are these little inside nods to the movie that somebody had been a mega fan.

Alice Vaughn 25:35
Well, you're gonna have to tell me because I never watched Well, we will tell you. And then we have the third guy and his gripe with Mr. Hart and understandable which is, so he's seduced by Mr. Hart's assistant. And then while blindfolded fucking the assistant, Mr. Hart decides to have a round which is not okay and Technically rape, right, let's call it whatever it is, you know. So yeah, that's a problem but there

Josh Sabarra 26:06
was one there was another one where they did at least make sure that the assistant I think they called him Darrin or Darrell and his assistant. The movie was Dolly Parton. Who was Dora Lee. So they kept the DS, you know,

Alice Vaughn 26:19
good call

Silvia Saige 26:19
didn't even notice that one. That's a good call. Yeah,

Alice Vaughn 26:22
no, it was really interesting is that after he is seduced by you know, and has this whole scenario play out with Mr. Hart. He wanders around his house. And so this is where, like, really, he goes to the backyard to like the back of the shed and there's a paper file cabinet that's like barely covered in trash bags. And in it is all of his important documents and of course blackmail, because that's where you keep the important shit in something that's easily going to be destroyed in the next thunderstorm easily

Josh Sabarra 26:57
right in your backyard, under attack.

Silvia Saige 27:00
Barely I cannot say anything to this because like if you were to ever break into my apartment I would be the easiest person to rob because my safe is Carrie able

Josh Sabarra 27:13
I don't even need to unlock it they can just leave with it.

Silvia Saige 27:16
Get away.

Josh Sabarra 27:19
I'm not sure that a portable safe makes any sense.

Silvia Saige 27:23
whatsoever and then I had to tell a friend where it was when I was out of town and they were like this is the worst.

Probably

Josh Sabarra 27:32
it's like there was soda cans or those pet rocks that people hide keys and are they jewelry in the refrigerator? They put like they have a can that looks like RC cola. Just says like our cola. Yeah. People keep in their fridge with jewelry. Yeah, cuz no wouldn't go and look for the first brand.

Silvia Saige 27:52
Yeah, that's me with my important paperwork and cash. So

Josh Sabarra 27:58
yeah, nothing good happens under it. You know,

Alice Vaughn 28:00
maybe Mr. Hart is more relatable than we think.

Silvia Saige 28:04
Yeah.

Josh Sabarra 28:06
Not good at. And also like the kind of business that they're all in is very vague. I did hear something in the first scene where they talked about it being something mutual funds or something other but it was very vague. A nine to five was sort of like that, too. I was gonna

Silvia Saige 28:23
say, I'm not sure what they did nine to five. Yeah,

Josh Sabarra 28:26
right. The company was called consolidated. And it had something to do with the shipping or transport of goods. But it was a little vague as to what the company itself did. And breaking Mr. Hart was going through the same thing. They sort of nailed it now.

Alice Vaughn 28:41
This is so off topic, but I know you mentioned pet rocks before. I mean, maybe they were in that business. I mean, do you guys know how many pet rocks are sold? I know this sounds so silly. No, please don't know. But I know it is

Josh Sabarra 28:53
a huge it's like a big thing right?

Alice Vaughn 28:55
There were 1.5 million pet rock, soul, bucking crazy. I'm sorry, can I say that? I'm sorry? Of course, dude, I want a porn podcast. Okay,

Josh Sabarra 29:04
no Silvia, we're gonna need you to clean up your act for the

Unknown Speaker 29:07
podcast.

Silvia Saige 29:11
I always tell people like I do not do clean comedy. Don't put me in that room. I don't even know when that bombs come out of my mouth. It just

don't put me around your children don't put me in a church and will be

Alice Vaughn 29:24
if people put me around their children, it's their fault. It's I say this day,

Josh Sabarra 29:28
right? I cannot contain this. They need to be accountable.

Silvia Saige 29:32
Right? They had the children not me, not my doing. Look, in my

Alice Vaughn 29:36
defense, you're gonna have to explain this stuff to your children anyway, it's, it's not my fault that they have to learn when it comes sloughed is early on in life. Okay? Yeah.

Silvia Saige 29:46
Yeah, take teach them young. Teach them young.

Josh Sabarra 29:49
That's what I say. But how many people get to learn and then have it in the flesh example right there at the same time. You really, you really are providing a service.

Unknown Speaker 30:00
Mommy wants to come.

Unknown Speaker 30:02
Well honey.

Unknown Speaker 30:06
That's not even wrong.

Silvia Saige 30:08
It's mommy's friend Sylvia and

Alice Vaughn 30:11
imagine like if mommy were to go to a waterpark, but it's all white. Right.

Silvia Saige 30:18
With lots of digs.

Josh Sabarra 30:19
I think that's the good analogy.

Lots of Fountains fountains, I've just pictured lazy river of semen. Oh my god. I feel

like I've been there. A sex themed adult theme park would be great. Right?

Alice Vaughn 30:33
Japan should get on it. Yeah,

Josh Sabarra 30:35
like there could be like, tip of the penis revolving restaurant

up to the top and it goes around. Just think of all the things we could do.

Alice Vaughn 30:46
What would be the teacup ride instead of spinning tea cups? Clearly a bottle?

Josh Sabarra 30:51
Oh, yeah, it would be some kind of it would be called like the rim wheel.

Silvia Saige 30:54
Yeah, get in the rim. Yeah,

Alice Vaughn 30:56
yeah. When mommy has to go to the ATM. It's a different kind of ATM. Smell baby asked him out.

Josh Sabarra 31:02
But it would be interesting to have a sex themed theme park when that

Alice Vaughn 31:06
should have been Walt Disney's vision from the beginning he needed to drop the anti semitism. It probably

Silvia Saige 31:11
was Walt Disney's vision and he got obscured i'd feel like well, Disney was a dirty fuck. So,

Dixon, like all of his movies, every single one, you failed us.

Josh Sabarra 31:22
Okay, so wait, so we have the character going and finding his personal information and Mr. Hart's yard under a tar?

Alice Vaughn 31:29
Yeah. And then we find out that apparently once he's confronted by Nina Hartley and decides to just chat with her and have some drinks, she actually owns the company. So Mr. Hart actually married into the job, right and the only reason that they haven't separated is because of the prenup. So

Josh Sabarra 31:49
the prenup that completely works in her favor. Yeah. And that if he ever has an affair, the entire fortune because to her Right, exactly.

So they come up with a plan. She's on the beach in Australia at

some

Alice Vaughn 32:03
Yeah. And she makes the world's fastest flight back from Australia. I totally am Australia that shit is nightmarishly long it is 17 hours no jet lag

Josh Sabarra 32:14
no time difference are we was on point she had gloves she'd read driving she was like dress to kill seven times store clothing

Alice Vaughn 32:24
yeah and they expect this Australian flight to land on time so that way to have the other guys can be seducing and having a pillow fight with Mr. Hart. And then of course she'll end up coming home and walking around early on him breaking his prenup claws and the pillow fight

Josh Sabarra 32:40
was funny because it was so did you see how going through the motions they were with the pillow fight like no feathers flying? It was

a one to the two Yeah, it was staged combat.

Silvia Saige 32:54
plan does not go as it's supposed to obviously because what do men want? Anything they can't have. So when he could have sex with these people when they were bringing it to him, he of course, had wanted nothing to do with it. So what did he have to do when he poisoned him? I can't even remember now was that what happened? Yes, he

Josh Sabarra 33:14
put poison is poison to knockout Mr. Hart. Now if you'll recall in the original nine to five, there is a plotline whereby the Lily Tomlin character accidentally poisons Mr. or thinks she poisons Mr. Hart because instead of using bleach, she uses rat poison and right. And so that was definitely a nod your original

Alice Vaughn 33:37
so I was watching actually the scene where Mr. Hart is clearly knocked out on the couch. And then the two other guys who came in to seduce him just end the fucking next to him. So my friend walks in, and he's like, is that guy dead? He didn't look dead.

Josh Sabarra 33:52
But also, I think we're not giving enough attention to the CGI and special effects for this film. Because you're This sequence you may have noticed that while Mr. Hart is passed out and the other two gentlemen are engaging in sexual activity, they're taking pictures of themselves with the passed out body. And we see screenshots still shots next to the video. Yeah, did I miss this? The whole budget had to have gone to CGI.

Unknown Speaker 34:19
Hey, no. How do you go back and watch this?

Alice Vaughn 34:23
spend it on only the exploding underwear.

Josh Sabarra 34:27
Underwear was this puts that to shame shit.

Silvia Saige 34:30
Yeah, they definitely brought in their highest paid editor and splashed a few photos on the screen next to the sacks so shots. Yeah, yeah.

Josh Sabarra 34:43
supermodel god damn it. It was great. It was great. It was great. And then we find that Mrs. Hart says that her husband has been sent to Brazil. Just like in nine to five

Silvia Saige 34:58
Yeah, she walks in finds him They're done. Let's see it.

Josh Sabarra 35:02
And then you'll notice there's one point where Pierce pulls out a name on a card. I think it's I don't know if it's supposed to be as it gets in his file. And on the card it says that the name is Cole Higgins. And Colin Higgins is the person who wrote and directed the original nine to five

Silvia Saige 35:19
and only you have to take that out.

Alice Vaughn 35:21
Yeah. What a nice nod.

Josh Sabarra 35:22
GP wells who put this together clearly is a fan of the original movie because, I mean, it would take another huge fan, right, isn't it? Yeah. Or I should say, which is I

Alice Vaughn 35:35
didn't notice that. What I found interesting is that they chose to do a CD instead of a hard drive in 2018.

Josh Sabarra 35:43
Maybe that also was a nod. Although I don't think at 1980 they even I mean we didn't have CDs right? I mean, didn't you notice they'll be like a nine to five like even they were had their landline telephones yeah may even had the thing that holds it holds the receiver Hold the receiver up to their ear.

Silvia Saige 36:02
Yeah. And you thought that was like such a cool thing to have. Because I used to have one of those when I worked in corporate America, and I thought it was awesome, because I was on the phone all the time. It was so convenient.

Josh Sabarra 36:11
But it is interesting to go back and see certain movies, you know, and having to take them for what they are. Right for. There were cell phones there before there were because now how many thrillers would we see that would be wrapped up in two seconds? Right, right, like 9 million of these movies from 1980. If you went back and added a cell phone problem

Alice Vaughn 36:30
would be solved. The Gossip Girl wouldn't exist. And that was in the early 2000s. Right, right. There you go. Actually, Seinfeld, I felt like most of the scenarios could have been cleared up with a text message

Silvia Saige 36:43
text, right? Yeah, hundred percent.

Josh Sabarra 36:45
It's funny how some time and advancements can really change plotting, right? It's character driven stuff that you go back and you watch that doesn't I mean, like the themes of nine to five, you can take all of the rest of this out of it, the things that we're talking about, and the themes are still so relevant.

Alice Vaughn 37:01
Yeah, absolutely. I mean, what's it Horrible Bosses built on the same premise? kinda

Silvia Saige 37:06
similar? Yeah, but they had different bosses. Not one boss. Yeah.

Alice Vaughn 37:09
Yeah. I mean, everybody kind of I feel like has had one boss at some point in time that they just want to stick it to. So, share is so relatable anyway. So yeah, and having worked

Josh Sabarra 37:19
in Hollywood for 25 years, I had some of the worst that exists. Do you want to spell? I think you hear about some of them implanting. I

Silvia Saige 37:26
was gonna say, and you did kind of stick it to them. So in the most literal sense,

Josh Sabarra 37:32
people get what they deserve. True. And it's funny how you know, you know, it's the funniest thing is you get people who will show up at book signings who have an entirely different idea of what your relationship with them was. You know, like years later, they show up. It's like the frenemy type people who you know, are the first people to buy your work.

Silvia Saige 37:51
Right, right.

Josh Sabarra 37:53
And I will get some of those beautiful, like, you should see sometimes like, it's shocking, like who I'll see Weapons certain things and I always write in their books things like wishing you all the happiness you deserve

because really only they know how much that is.

Alice Vaughn 38:14
I mean that's why sometimes if I'm having a shitty day and someone is being asked to me I'll just say I hope your days as pleasant as you are, right?

Josh Sabarra 38:21
Yes. Yeah. The best thing is when you can you know when you can say those little things to somebody who's not being good to you. And you can say something that's one of those like little like nuanced hidden gems that you can pat yourself on the back for they don't even know they've been installed. Did you feel better? Yeah. Those are the back.

Alice Vaughn 38:41
You mean every shower moment I've ever had? Yeah.

Josh Sabarra 38:46
Clearly, yeah.

Alice Vaughn 38:47
So this is story from porn, again, out of curiosity come to mind, because I mean, I know I'm gonna read the whole thing, but you mentioned LIKE A BOSS sticking it to

Josh Sabarra 38:57
the purpose of it is not to stick it to anybody. And I didn't name anybody and I, you know, some of them are composites of people. But it was to sort of show how the industry has a way, if you're somebody who already doesn't feel good about yourself, which was me for a very long time, never feeling good enough. And, you know, working in Hollywood is one of the worst places that you can look for your sense of self. So that was really, you know, I sort of turned a hobby and a passion into a career. But it was really the worst thing for my spirit because I was working with people who you know, just want to beat you down or, you know, Hollywood's an industry where it's very easy to fail upward. You know, there's very little about it. Science, it's more of a it's not a quantifiable business. Yes. You know, how many, you know how much money a movie made at the box office or whatever, but it's very easy to sort of be mediocre and succeed, and very territorial, and they want to stay in their job. Amen to that. Yeah. And people want to stay in their jobs and they don't want to be you know, they don't want to be found out. It's like the Emperor's New Clothes, right? And so the easiest way to do that is to put other people down and make people feel not good about themselves. And I feel like I dealt with that for a lot of years. And as somebody who already didn't feel good enough, it was the last place to look for self esteem.

Alice Vaughn 40:16
Yeah, and it's so easy to I mean, God not have self esteem in LA cheese's. I went over for one week. There's two situations I ever feel that I need to go to the gym more and the first is whatever I'm at a porn conference or the specifically the ABA ends. Holy shit you ladies are resources are just

Josh Sabarra 40:39
right, but also you have to remember that Silvia is in the business of being beautiful.

Silvia Saige 40:43
Yeah. My job

Josh Sabarra 40:45
yeah, and her look like that. No, I mean, I admire it and I think it's amazing that she's as gorgeous as she is. But you know, I look at these guys like I look at piers, I'm

Alice Vaughn 40:55
not putting you down, trust me. No, of course. Ultimate fits bow. That's all I'm saying,

Josh Sabarra 41:01
believe me, I look at like peers like we go out to dinner and I see how he eats and how he has to stay looking a certain way. And you see, I mean in breaking Mr. Hart, his body is on full display. And I can never be that person. I am never going to have those abs because I'm always going to have pizza. And then I say to everyone else, eat your salad and be sad, but I'm going to have my

Alice Vaughn 41:26
Wait, we came up with another shirt, eat your salad and be sad.

Josh Sabarra 41:31
You heard it here.

Alice Vaughn 41:33
Okay, so that said we do have some patrons to think so this week we want to thank Bethany Aiden Ferran stock, Mike sorbets, ko priest pilot Elisa Falco. Hi, Andrew Gore, Matthew Kolb, rowdy Steven Jones, Bob Dole rental, Neil hallstrom, Neil Simpson, Michael Gad, and many, many others. And by the way, if you want to become a patron yourself, just hop on over to patreon.com slash two girls on Mike. It's also in the show notes. If you want to help Yvette out with her medical fund just head over to PSI babe calm. You can follow all of our stuff and shenanigans on either Facebook our website, our Twitter account tg o m podcast, but Sylvia and Josh, where can our listeners find more of you guys?

Silvia Saige 42:18
Yeah, you can find me online. I'm Silvia sage, si LVIA si g you can find me on all social media platforms there or you can find my podcast sexy, funny role on all places where you can find podcast I Heart Radio, iTunes, Stitcher, and you can also find my second podcast sexual disorientation with Dr. Romney to bosma on iTunes and all podcast platforms. I will

Alice Vaughn 42:43
link to those in the show notes and Josh, where can our listeners find you?

Josh Sabarra 42:47
You can find me on Instagram and Twitter at Josh cervera jo sh s A Ba ra and on Facebook at Josh servera author. My books are available on Amazon or wherever books are sold Barnes and Noble you name it. And I love hearing from people. So, you know,

Alice Vaughn 43:05
just send all the hate mail to you know

Josh Sabarra 43:08
what? Whatever you need to get out of your system. That's fine.

Alice Vaughn 43:12
Perfect. So we will link to the hate mail address in the show notes as well.

Josh Sabarra 43:19
Listen as long as people are paying attention.

Alice Vaughn 43:21
Yeah, true.

Josh Sabarra 43:23
They have a point of view.

Silvia Saige 43:24
Yes. Well,

Alice Vaughn 43:26
I say that until I hear a shitty point of view. Well, exactly. But guys, thanks for tuning in this week. Bye

Unknown Speaker 43:33
bye.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

Alice is joined by guest-host Ginger Banks (@gingerbanks) and her fellow pornstar friend, Lo Valentine (@LoValentine_). The ladies watch Deadpool XXX and talk set makeup, trademarks, Star Wars prequels, bad Cosmo sex tips, fluffers, fake pop shots, conspiracy theories in porn, and more. Don't forget to leave a review! 

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