Explore every episode of the podcast To Be A Boy

Baby loss is often discussed through the experiences of mothers, but what about fathers? In this Baby Loss Awareness Week special, Joeli speaks with Peter Reeves, founder of Nod Is Not Enough, Errol Murray of Leeds Dads, and Vicki Robinson, CEO of Miscarriage UK, about the grief, trauma and isolation men can experience following miscarriage and baby loss. From devastating personal stories to practical advice on support, fatherhood and recovery, this is a powerful conversation about loss, masculinity and why men need space to grieve too.

N.I.N.E (Nod Is Not Enough) https://www.nodisnotenough.com

Ebony Bonds https://www.ebonybonds.org.uk

Leeds Dads https://leedsdads.org

Miscarriage UK https://www.miscarriageuk.org

Tommy's https://www.tommys.org

Sands https://www.sands.org.uk

Five X More https://www.fivexmore.com

How do we stop boys being pulled into the manosphere, without making them feel blamed or shut out? In this episode, Elliott sits down with Mayor of London Sadiq Khan to talk about online misogyny, positive masculinity and why listening to boys matters.

The Mayor introduces City Hall’s “Ignore the noise. Trust your own voice” campaign and its practical N.O.I.S.E. check, designed to help young people question the content competing for their attention. The conversation also looks at the real-world role of fathers, teachers, youth workers and football coaches, as well as why better paternity leave could help create more present dads and healthier role models from the very beginning. We talking about raising thoughtful young men, and giving every boy the tools, relationships and opportunities to flourish.

Let them be bored! Six weeks, endless snacks and the nagging feeling that you should be running a children’s cruise ship from your kitchen.

Playworker Amber joins Elliott to explain why parents can lower the bar and why boredom, messy play and a little independence can be brilliant for children. Packed with simple, low-cost ideas for toddlers to teens, inclusive advice for children with additional needs and a persuasive case for the adventure playground, this is a warm, reassuring guide to a summer with more connection, less pressure and far less forced fun.

Masculinities educator Lewis Wedlock joins Joeli and Elliott to talk boys, schools, online influence and why the best conversations start with curiosity rather than condemnation. From “borrowed phrases” on the internet to helping young men sit with discomfort, this is a sharp, hopeful and very human conversation about teaching boys HOW to think, not just WHAT to think.

Book - Masculinities in Schools by Lewis Wedlock

Links mentioned:

Voice of the Boys report

State of UK Men 2025 report

Safer Scrolling

In this wonderfully hopeful episode of To Be a Boy, Joeli speaks to Professor Seán Redmond about boys, belonging and how children can be drawn into criminal networks. Drawing on decades of youth justice experience and his landmark Greentown research, Seán explains why punishment alone rarely works — and why young people need accountability, safe spaces and trusted adults who believe nothing is ever too bad to talk about. He believes that things can always be fixed.

REPPP - Research Evidence into Policy, Programmes and Practice

https://www.ul.ie/artsoc/ccjvs/research/youth-justice/reppp

In this episode of To Be A Boy, Joeli and Elliott are joined by podcast BFF, couples coach, father of three and Be a Happier Parent host Alex Trippier for a raw (seriously, get your tissues READY), funny and deeply honest conversation about modern fatherhood. Together, they explore the mental load, anger, repair, school refusal, resilience, sensitive boys, the manosphere, porn, consent and what it really takes to raise boys without passing on old models of fear, toughness and control. From the shame of losing your temper to the power of apology, Alex makes the case for parenting with more connection, more courage and a lot less certainty.https://www.instagram.com/beahappierparent/

In this episode of To Be A Boy, Joeli and Elliott unpack the newly announced social media ban for under-16s: from TikTok, YouTube and Roblox to VPNs, WhatsApp and the very real risk that teenagers are simply left to “stare at the wall”.

They ask whether the ban is a necessary cultural reset, a blunt instrument, or both. They also look at what young people need instead: youth clubs, third spaces, safer online communities, and more honest support for families. Plus, a detour into The Care Gap, boys and domestic responsibility, dinner fatigue, England football feelings, and Elliott’s surprisingly nerve-wracking mission to give men flowers for Father’s Day.

Joeli and Elliott are joined by Shuab Gamote, advocate for young people, strategic adviser to the NEETs Commission, and co-author of Inside the Mind of a 16-Year-Old.

Shuab has spoken to more than 1,000 young people across the UK, and in this conversation he shares what they are really saying about school, work, confidence, social media, COVID, class, AI, safety, and the future. Together, they explore why so many boys feel misunderstood, why the education system is failing some young people, and why confidence, purpose, trusted adults and real-world opportunities matter so much.

It’s a wide-ranging, hopeful and deeply human conversation about what boys are navigating today, and what parents, schools, employers and policymakers can do to help them feel seen, valued and ready for the world ahead.

In a world of social media, body pressures, dating confusion and manosphere content that’s only getting louder, what does it mean to be a young man right now?

In this episode, Elliott and Joeli speak to Ricardo Barcello, a 19-year-old student and member of the Movember Youth Advisory Board, about what life really feels like for young men today. From gym culture and skincare anxiety to friendship, misogyny, dating and the growing divide between boys and girls, Ricardo brings honesty, empathy and much-needed nuance to the conversation.

This week, Elliott is joined by educator and campaigner Andrew “Bernie” Bernard, with Koru Kid's very own Rachel Carrell stepping in brilliantly as co-host.

Hold tight for this one, the team are going deep on some big topics and have some genuinely thought-provoking questions to a big conversation about boys, masculinity and the world they’re growing up in. Together, they unpack everything from the manosphere and controlling behaviour to why boys need boundaries, care and, as Bernie puts it, a healthy sense of humour. It's a moving episode that's going to stick with you.

Join Joeli and Elliott as we revisit our conversation with John Amaechi to talk all things sports, identity and masculinity, emphasising the importance of emotional intelligence and intimacy among men. John reflects on his experiences as a latecomer to basketball and how it shaped his understanding of masculinity. They also roll up their sleeves and delve into the societal pressures surrounding masculinity, the need for empathy, and the responsibility of parents and coaches in nurturing healthy relationships. John advocates for a redefinition of masculinity that embraces vulnerability and connection, urging listeners to foster environments where boys can express their emotions freely and develop meaningful relationships: it's right up our street.

Meadhbh Park, author of Blackpilled and expert in countering violent extremism, joins Joeli and Elliott to unpack the ideologies pulling young men towards the darkest corners of the internet. From the nihilistic “black pill” philosophy and incel communities to the mainstream creep of looks-maxing culture and self-optimisation content, she maps the full landscape of the Manosphere and explains why loneliness, not hatred, is often where it all begins.The conversation gets practical too. Meadhbh shares the warning signs parents should watch for, why autistic and socially isolated boys are particularly vulnerable, and what tools can actually help. She also offers a more human portrait of the young men inside these communities than the headlines tend to allow: not monsters, but often deeply broken kids who found their first sense of belonging in the worst possible place.

Recorded live at Push 4 Paternity Leave, this super special episode captures the vibe that was that day. Consider it another chance to soak up the energy, humour and urgency behind the fight for better parental leave. Expect brilliant speeches, honest stories and a powerful case for why better paternity leave matters for dads, mums, children, relationships and society.

In short: two weeks is a joke, and parents deserve more.

Be prepared for a warm heart: Elliott and Joeli are joined by Gavin Morgan, co-CEO of the Scottish charity Growing2gether, whose work pairs teenagers who are struggling with younger children in nurseries and primary schools.

We’re exploring what happens when boys are trusted with something real to care about: how responsibility can soften the armour, build confidence, and open the door to connection. From a powerful story of a selectively mute nursery child finding his voice, to practical reflections on presence, belonging, and the kind of community young people are searching for, this episode is a hopeful reminder that boys don’t need “fixing”, they need to be SEEN.

We’re joined by Professor Paul Galdas (University of York), chair of the Men’s Health Academic Network and a key architect of the UK’s men’s health strategy. We dig into why men delay seeking help and why the answer isn’t “men need to do better”, but services that fit how men actually live. From loneliness and deprivation to father-inclusive care, paternity leave, and the post-Manosphere search for meaning, this is a practical episode on what needs to change and what parents can do for the boys in their orbit.

Joeli and Elliott sit down with the glorious author of 'Be A Man About It' and men’s health advocate, George Bell to unpack what “man up” really teaches boys and what it costs them later.

From emotional literacy and male loneliness to the collapse of community “third spaces”, they explore how parents, schools and role models can help boys ask for help without shame and grow into men who can be strong and soft at the same time.

You can get George's superb book here: linktr.ee/georgeybell

Louis Theroux’s Manosphere documentary asked what is this? This episode asks what do we do now? Joined by NSPCC’s Ineke Houtenbos, we unpack how boys actually encounter Manosphere content, why algorithms reward rage, and what it’s really doing to boys’ mental health and girls’ safety. One for parents looking for what they can do when the internet is shouting louder than they are.

Here with some signposts for you:

• Tackling misogyny masterclass | On-demand training | NSPCC Learning
• Free online safety webinars for schools | NSPCC Learning
• Childline | Free counselling service for kids and young people | Childline
• Contact us | NSPCC
• Report child abuse | NSPCC
• Donate to Charity Online | Give to NSPCC today | NSPCC

Day‑one parental rights. Stronger protections at work. An end to silence agreements hiding discrimination. And a serious rethink of how the UK supports parents to actually afford time with their kids.

The Employment Rights Act is changing the rules of work and this conversation gets into what that really means for dads, mums, self‑employed parents, kinship carers and families trying to stay afloat. From paternity leave that finally starts on day one, to flexible working that employers can’t just dismiss, to the long‑overdue review of parental leave and pay, we dig into where the system is shifting, where it still falls short, and what comes next.

This is about fairness, dignity, and whether work in the UK is finally starting to catch up with real life.

Check out the following resources:

• New employment rights: Guidance for businesses and workers - providing guidance for employers and workers
• Make Work Pay - GOV.UK - where you can find consultations and policy papers relating to the government's Make Work Pay initiative

Joe Wicks, is a GOOD MAN – the type we're glad to role model to our boys. And Hark! Lucky us, he joins To Be A Boy for a powerful conversation about boys, body image, gym culture, social media pressure and modern fatherhood. The man is home schooling his four children alongside his wife and we love that for them.

From growing up without a male role model to becoming a PE teacher to millions, Joe reflects on how movement can support boys’ mental health and when fitness culture can tip into obsession and explores how parents can help boys grow into kind, emotionally healthy men, not just strong bodies.

A must‑listen for anyone raising boys in a world full of algorithms, abs and unrealistic expectations.

Joeli and Elliott dive into the biology, psychology and sheer chaos of fatherhood with evolutionary anthropologist Dr. Anna Machin. They look at the wild hormonal rewiring, brain upgrades and instinctive nurturing behaviours that kick in when men become fathers.

Spoiler: testosterone drops, oxytocin rises, and suddenly dad is biologically primed to bond, care and spot danger like a caffeinated meerkat. From rough‑and‑tumble play (which is apparently developmental gold) to the hidden crisis of UK paternity leave, this episode tackles the science behind why dads matter.

We also explore the big issues shaping boyhood today: fatherlessness, social father figures, resilience, emotional development, toxic masculinity myths, and why youth clubs disappearing is basically society shooting itself in the foot.

This episode is supported by Koru Kids, a childcare marketplace helping busy families find brilliant, trusted part time nannies.

From school pickups to homework, dinner and winding down, Koru Kids gives parents some easy days in their week, with vetted, trained nannies across the UK. Find out more here: ⁠⁠⁠http://bit.ly/49y19rl⁠⁠

The UK is deciding whether to ban under‑16s from social media, and we’ve got the Online Safety Minister in the hot seat but before that they chew the fat on THAT vote in parliament and who’s right in the knock ginger/knock-a-door run debate…

Elliott and Joeli grill Kanishka Narayan on screen‑time addiction, bullying, harmful content, porn regulation, school‑wide phone bans, and whether often-times glacial governments stand a chance of keeping up with tech giants.

If you care about kids, policy or your own scrolling habits, thisone’s for you.

Parents are invited to access the online safety hubhere:  https://www.educateagainsthate.com/online-safety-parent-hub/

And the online consultation here: http://www.gov.uk/government/consultations/growing-up-in-the-online-world-a-national-consultation

This episode is supported by Koru Kids, a childcaremarketplace helping busy families find brilliant, trusted part time nannies.

From school pickups to homework, dinner and winding down, Koru Kids gives parents some easy days in their week, with vetted, trained nannies across the UK. Find out more here: ⁠⁠⁠http://bit.ly/49y19rl⁠⁠

Join this lively debate with Joeli and Elliott, as experts Sonia Livingstone and Susie Davies tackle the hot topic of social media bans for under-16s in the UK. Discover the pros and cons of digital consent age, the impact on mental health, and the role of parents in navigating the digital landscape.

The gloves are off! (No experts were harmed in the recording of this episode.)

This episode is supported by Koru Kids, a childcare marketplace helping busy families find brilliant, trusted part time nannies.

From school pickups to homework, dinner and winding down, Koru Kids gives parents some easy days in their week, with vetted, trained nannies across the UK.

Find out more here: ⁠⁠http://bit.ly/49y19rl⁠⁠

Rerelease alert! First aired on 10 June 2025, this episode with our favourite feels even more relevant now that the government is flirting with the idea of booting under 16s off social media entirely. So we’re revisiting our chat with 15 year old Josh Sargent — boy, book writer, manosphere decoder, and all round legend. Josh breaks down how teen boys get sucked into online masculinity culture, why Andrew Tate was everywhere, and what finally snapped him out of it. Still one of our favourite episodes, and honestly… even more relevant (and alarming) in 2026.

We're also pointing you towards our Push for Paternity March: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/push-for-paternity-leave-tickets-1982354647113

This episode is supported by Koru Kids, a childcare marketplace helping busy families find brilliant, trusted part time nannies.From school pickups to homework, dinner and winding down, Koru Kids gives parents some easy days in their week, with vetted, trained nannies across the UK.

Find out more here: ⁠⁠http://bit.ly/49y19rl⁠⁠

Filmmaker, author and former rapper Fredi Nwaka joins Elliott and Joeli for a powerful, funny and deeply honest conversation about modern masculinity, fatherhood, vulnerability, identity, gang life and healing. From growing up as “the only Black boy in the world” to redefining what it means to be a strong man, Fredi shares lessons on softness, parenting, legacy and the boys we’re raising today. And yes, we get a live rap on the show...

We know you’re going to get the Fredi bug like we did, and you can follow him on Instagram: @therealfredinwaka  @boy_by_fredinwaka and get signed copies of the book directly from his website www.fredinwaka.com although it's available from Amazon, Waterstones, Foyles and all good bookstores too. Enjoy the Fredi vibes!

This episode is supported by Koru Kids, a childcare marketplace helping busy families find brilliant, trusted part time nannies.From school pickups to homework, dinner and winding down, Koru Kids gives parents some easy days in their week, with vetted, trained nannies across the UK.Find out more here: http://bit.ly/49y19rl

In this episode of To Be A Boy, Elliott and Joeli bring together two seasoned secondary school teachers: Will in Newcastle and Machel in London to dig into pull back the curtain on what’s actually going on with boys today.

From “TikTokified” worldviews and “bantified” misogyny to the quiet crises unfolding in the school corridors, they reveal a rapidly shifting landscape that teachers are somehow expected to fix with little more than a whiteboard pen and a prayer. Their stories are equal parts hard, inspiring and deeply human, offering a frontline perspective that cuts through the headlines and hysteria.

This episode is supported by Koru Kids, a childcare marketplace helping busy families find brilliant, trusted part-time nannies.

From school pickups to homework, dinner and winding down, Koru Kids gives parents some easy days in their week, with vetted, trained nannies across the UK.

Find out more here: http://bit.ly/49y19rl

Comedian Darren Harriot joins us for a raw and unsurprisingly funny conversation about grief, masculinity and growing up after losing his dad at 11. From childhood depression to adult shame, from stand‑up as survival to the pressure men feel to “hold it all together,” Darren opens up with honesty and insight. We were really grateful to talk to him about his story.

A powerful, hopeful episode for anyone raising boys, loving men, or figuring out their own story. If this resonates with you, we invite you to listen to Darren's show, Father Figuring: https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/series/m002lzw8

This episode is supported by Koru Kids, a childcare marketplace helping busy families find brilliant, trusted part-time nannies.

From school pickups to homework, dinner and winding down, Koru Kids gives parents some easy days in their week, with vetted, trained nannies across the UK.

Find out more here: http://bit.ly/49y19rl

We sit down with the absolutely delightful Gary Barker, CEO of Equimundo for an honest and hopeful conversation about why so many boys and men feel lonely, overwhelmed and disconnected.

No small ask: we're asking him what the hell we can do about it. From friendships to (ye olde favourite,) screens to the pressure to “provide,” Gary talks Joeli and Elliott through the big picture, and has a signature warmth that'll suck you in and some much needed clarity. We're jealous that you haven't heard this yet - enjoy!

https://equimundo.org

https://www.equimundo.org/resources/state-of-uk-men-2025/

This episode is supported by Koru Kids, a childcare marketplace helping busy families find brilliant, trusted part-time nannies.

From school pickups to homework, dinner and winding down, Koru Kids gives parents some easy days in their week, with vetted, trained nannies across the UK.

Find out more here: http://bit.ly/49y19rl

In this episode, we sit down with Richard Pomfrett, a martial‑arts‑instructor‑turned‑boy‑whisperer, to unpack why boys sometimes go from chatty little legends to mysterious, grunty teenagers who only communicate via Fortnite and side‑eye. Richard’s spent 25 years helping boys navigate the pressures of modern masculinity, from “must‑get‑six‑pack‑before-puberty” anxiety to the weird world of online influencers.

He also shares his brilliantly simple recipe for getting boys to open up: “be open, be positive, be curious”. It's emotional first aid, minus the tiny plasters.

Whether you're a parent, teacher or someone just trying to understand why your kid suddenly needs a six‑figure salary by Year 6, this one is packed solid with practical tips.

⁠https://www.boyz-2-men.org.uk/⁠

⁠https://TheStaySafeInitiative.org.uk⁠

This episode is supported by Koru Kids, a childcare marketplace helping busy families find brilliant, trusted part-time nannies.

From school pickups to homework, dinner and winding down, Koru Kids gives parents some easy days in their week, with vetted, trained nannies across the UK.

Find out more here: http://bit.ly/49y19rl

What happens when you dig into unpaid labour and accidentally expose the entire wiring of modern family life?

In this episode of To Be A Boy, Joeli and Elliott chat with the brilliant Melissa Hogenboom, author of Breadwinners, about why sharing the care still feels revolutionary, why breadwinning still clings to outdated gender scripts, and why so many men discover far too late that the nappy bag does not self‑restock.

Together they unpack the invisible work running households, relationships and mental health: the unseen planning others absorb, the pressure men carry as designated “providers,” and the hopeful rise of caring masculinities. A funny, warm, quietly radical episode for anyone trying to build a more equal home, one chore, one conversation at a time.

This episode is supported by Philips Avent, a brand trusted by families for over 40 years. ⁠With its Share the Care mission⁠, the brand is helping mums reclaim time for themselves and championing a shift in how we think about parenting.

Motherhood is magical… but it can also be utterly exhausting. In this episode of To Be a Boy, Marci El-Deiry, Leader of Philips Mother and Child Care and working parent sits down with Joeli and Elliott to unpack why the world urgently needs to rethink how we talk about mums, selfcare, and the mythical idea of “doing it all.”

From the shocking reality that most mums get less than an hour to themselves each day to the cultural scripts that pressure mothers to martyr themselves, Marci brings honesty, humour, and a global business perspective to a conversation parents need to hear. She reveals how shared caregiving, supportive “villages,” and small everyday shifts can help families not just survive, but thrive – for the sake of our boys and children.

If you care about a mother, are a mother, or simply want to understand the invisible load behind early parenthood, this episode will change how you see the first year — and the role we all play in it.

This episode is supported by Philips Avent, a brand trusted by families for over 40 years. With its Share the Care mission, the brand is helping mums reclaim time for themselves and championing a shift in how we think about parenting.

We start the podcast’s year off with a super special guest: it’s only the Prime Minister in the chair! This episode of To Be A Boy was recorded in IKEA Croydon, among meatballs and Billy bookcases, where Elliott Rae and Joeli Brearley grilled Sir Keir Starmer on the biggest shake-up to workers’ rights in a generation: the Employment Rights Act.

We’re talking stronger flexible working laws, miscarriage leave, enhanced protections for parents, and a day-one right to sick pay. Plus, we tackle zero-hour contracts, sexual harassment prevention, and menopause action plans. And because we’re us, we didn’t stop there: childcare costs, mental health for dads, and whether six weeks paid paternity leave could actually happen all made the cut.It’s bold, it’s honest, and it’s served with a side of Swedish meatballs.

If you care about parental rights, gender equality, and the future of family life in the UK, this is the episode you didn’t know you needed.

This episode is supported by Koru Kids, a childcare marketplace helping busy families find brilliant, trusted part-time nannies. From school pickups to homework, dinner and winding down, Koru Kids gives parents some easy days in their week, with vetted, trained nannies across the UK.

Find out more here: http://bit.ly/49y19rl

We’re back in the studio (and yes, the chairs are dangerously comfy) to celebrate nearly a year of To Be A Boy. From Ruth Whippman’s eye-opening research on raising boys, to Lenore Skenazy convincing us to let kids roam free, to John Amaechi’s powerful truths about identity, we’re unpacking the moments that made us laugh, cry, and rethink everything. Plus, a shout-out to Josh—the 14-year-old genius who might just save masculinity. Join us for highlights, surprises, and a little festive chaos as we look ahead to what’s next.

Thanks for a wonderful year, wonderful listeners!

What does it take to raise a brilliant boy with autism in a world full of stigma, systemic hurdles, and cultural misconceptions? In this episode, childcare lawyer and super-mum Deborah Otubambo shares her 21-year journey of advocacy, resilience, and hope whilst raising a son with autism.

From the early days of confusion and cultural stigma to navigating the complex world of EHCPs and education, Deborah shares what it really takes to advocate for your child against systemic hurdles. She talks candidly about the emotional toll, the misconceptions she faced, and how her perspective on diagnosis evolved over time. This conversation is a raw and hopeful look at resilience, community, and redefining success for families of children with special educational needs.Some notes for you:

The number of cases brought to tribunal that are successful is actually 98%: https://www.specialneedsjungle.com/55-rise-2024-send-tribunal-appeals-cost-families-incalculable/Costs can vary wildly - and unless you get legal aid then it can cost up to £20,000 to take this action.

Resources mentioned in this episode include:
https://www.ipsea.org.uk

https://www.braain.co.uk/sen

https://family-action.org.uk/our-work-impact/send/

https://sossen.org.uk

https://www.specialneedsjungle.com

What does it mean to grow up as a boy today? Spoiler: It’s not all football and moonwalks anymore.

In this episode of To Be A Boy, Joeli and Elliott sit down with Lee Chambers, psychologist, and founder of Male Allies UK, and all-around champion for modern masculinity. They are unpacking a report that’s both eye-opening and alarming - although there is some hope mixed in too!

From boys feeling unheard and disconnected to the rise of AI “girlfriends”, Lee takes us inside the minds of the next generation and asks: what happens when adolescence collides with algorithms and what can we do as allies?

In this episode of To Be a Boy, our Elliott and Joeli are getting stuck into the fascinating (and occasionally sobering) world of modern masculinity. Joined by Joe Hall from Channel 4 and Fergus Navaratnam-Blair from the National Research Group, we’re unpacking the findings of the Mirror on Masculinities report. From why a third of men rarely see the kind of bloke they aspire to be in advertising, to why Angry Ginge streaming FIFA might be more relatable than Johnny Depp flogging aftershave, this episode is getting intoit.

Expect some eyebrow-raising stats and plenty of insights as we tackle everything from the rise of Twitch streamers as role models to the curious concept of “masculinity vertigo.”

Joeli and Elliott are joined by the inimitable Cindy Gallop to discuss her ground breaking work with Make Love Not Porn, addressing the impact of pornography on societal expectations and relationships. She describes the importance of open conversations about sex and love, particularly in educating children and young adults and the amazing results she’s seen as a direct result of her work. They also touch on the challenges of funding and support for sex education initiatives, the decline of intimacy among young people, and the need for a cultural shift in how we talk about sex and relationships.

Be warned – this is a no holds barred conversation with swearing et al.

Please do check out the BRILLIANT Make Love Not Porn Academy here: https://www.makelovenotporn.academy/and the change.org campaign here: https://www.change.org/p/calling-for-fair-visibility-for-all-on-linkedin\

Let’s spread the word about this amazing and vital work for men, boys, women and girls.

Joeli and Elliott are taking us through THAT Chanté Joseph Vogue article and asking if and why it’s uncool to have a boyfriend…

This episode explores the complexities of modern relationships, the impact of social media, and the evolving roles of men and women. We’re also tackling topics like heterofatalism, the trad wife movement, and the balance of unpaid labour: all in a day’s work.

In this episode, Elliott Rae and Joeli Brearley are joinedby their favourite guest-slash-interrogator, producer Kaley Botting, for a freewheeling chat spanning everything from International Men’s Day to the emotional fallout of the John Lewis Christmas ad.

Expect reflections on parenting, gender disappointment, and why brunch raves might just be the salvation of middle-aged joy-seekers. Also: Elliott tries to swap children,Joeli cries over retail marketing, and Kaley’s mum’s WhatsApp group makes a surprise cameo. And just when you think it couldn’t get more profound, they end with a dad joke showdown that may or may not involve ChatGPT. (Spoiler: it does.)

Joeli and Elliott sit down with, yes you heard us right, John Amaechi to talk all things sports, identity and masculinity, emphasizing the importance of emotional intelligence and intimacy among men. John reflects on his experiences as a latecomer to basketball and how it shaped his understanding of masculinity.

They also roll up their sleeves and delve into the societal pressures surrounding masculinity, the need for empathy, and the responsibility of parents and coaches in nurturing healthy relationships. John advocates for a redefinition of masculinity that embraces vulnerability and connection, urging listeners to foster environments where boys can express their emotions freely and develop meaningful relationships: it's right up our street.

In this episode of To Be A Boy, Elliott Rae and Joeli Brearley sit down with Richard Reeves—author of Of Boys and Men and chair of the UK’s Centre for Policy Research on Boys and Men—for a candid, compassionate conversation about the challenges facing boys and young men today.

Together, they explore how schools can better support boys, why male role models matter, and how masculinity can be reimagined without shame or stereotype. Whether you're a parent, educator, policymaker, or simply curious about gender equality, this episode offers a refreshing and nuanced take on what it means to grow up male in today’s world.

If he's good enough for Obama, he's good enough for TBAB!

In this episode, Joeli, Elliott, and Producer Kaley havetheir first ‘Questions with Kaley’ session.

The TBAB team explore the concept of 'the ick' in dating, the importance of emotional support in relationships, and the impact of paternity leave on family dynamics. Joeli passes on some cracking advice about future proofing the dynamic with a Dad and Elliott reveals his Good Man ofmusic, and MORE people!

In this heartfelt and thought-provoking episode of To BeA Boy, Joeli and Elliott are joined by the brilliant SarahOckwell-Smith, one of the UK’s leading parenting experts and bestselling author of The Gentle Parenting Book and How to Raise a Teen.

Together, they dive deep into the challenges and misconceptions surrounding modern boyhood, masculinity, and parenting, with Sarah offering rich insights from her decades of experience and her upcoming book How to Raise a Gentle Man. The trio explore how we can better support boys with an emphasis on birth through adolescence, challenging stereotypes and championing emotional intelligence, empathy, and authentic self-expression. You.will.learn.a.lot!

In this episode Joeli and Elliott speak with Dr. Alex Blowerto dive into the uphill battle faced by working-class boys in education—think less Hogwarts, more hurdles. From aspiration gaps to the masculinity myths messing with motivation, he shares insights, stories, and a few reality checks. It’s time to rethink how we support boys in the classroom.

Join us live from the phenomenal Working Dads’ Summit! In To Be A Boy’s first live recording, Joeli faces a grilling from Elliott. They explore the impact of the motherhood penalty, the importance of parental leave, co-parenting, and the role of support networks for working parents.

As per usual, get in touch with your thoughts and questionsat tobeaboyteam@gmail.com

From body image and the pressure to provide, to violence, vulnerability and viral masculinity myths—this episode dives deep into the challenges boys face and how we can support them. Elliott and Joeli chat with Dan Guinness and Ben Hurst from Beyond Equality about what it means to be a boy today. Expect wisdom, warmth, and a few laughs along the way.

In this powerful and practical episode, Joeli and Elliott sit down with parenting coach and founder of Parenting Boys Peacefully, Tosha Schore, to tackle one of the toughest topics: aggression in boys.

From meltdowns and morning chaos to verbal outbursts and sibling clashes, Tosha shares compassionate, connection-based strategies for helping boys manage big feelings—without shame, blame or punishment. Expect real talk, relatable stories, and tips you can use today (including the surprisingly effective “drop to the floor” method).

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https://www.toshaschore.com/owa

We’re back! Joeli and Elliott catch up after summer, swap stories about Welsh golf buggies and nudist beaches, and reflect on the emotional rollercoaster of raising boys and returning to school, expect a few tears. Joeli shares her new venture, GrowthSpurt, and Elliott previews the world’s first Working Dads Summit. Plus, a sneak peek at the incredible guests lined up for Series 3, including Richard Reeves, John Amaechi, and Beyond Equality.

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GrowthSpurt www.growth-spurt.uk

Working Dads Summit www.workingdadssummit.com

Parenting Out Loud on LinkedIn www.linkedin.com/company/parenting-out-loud

Health educator and author Christopher Pepper joins Joeli and Elliott to talk puberty, masculinity, gaming, anger, love, and what to do when your son might be Googling “how to get bigger muscles.” From emotional literacy to ethical decision-making, this episode is packed with practical advice, heartfelt stories, and laughs for anyone raising boys in today’s world.

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www.talktoyourboys.com

⁠workingdadssummit.com⁠⁠

www.laurahenryallain.com/news/my-skin-your-skin/

In this warm, funny, and deeply insightful episode, Joeli and Elliott are joined by author and boy-mum extraordinaire Uju Asika, whose latest book Raising Boys Who Do Better is a hopeful guide for parenting boys in today’s complex world. From cuddles and culture clashes to clitoris conversations and pickled onion Monster Munch, this episode dives into the joys and challenges of raising boys with kindness, clarity, and a whole lot of humour.

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Raising Boys Wo do Better

workingdadssummit.com⁠

Joeli and Elliott are joined by Owen Thomas and Chris Stein from Future Men to explore how we can better support boys in today’s world. From redefining masculinity and tackling stereotypes to practical tools for parents and educators, this episode is packed with insight, humour, and hope.

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futuremen.org

workingdadssummit.com