Sarah Wheeler and Garrett Bucks, a real life adult woman and man who are friends, unpack the world of cis, hetero, nuclear family life and culture, with jokes and hand gestures.
Normally, these Ask Breeders Anything episodes, where Sarah and Garrett leave each other voice mails exploring all manner of gender-adjacent curiosity, are just for paid subscribers. BUT, this one is going to all of you. You’re welcome. And also, we’re sorry, because yes this is in place of what would normally be a full episode. You’re not getting one of those because, for the past couple weeks, both hosts have been navigating a combination of spring break and illness.
What did we talk about? CPAPs, antidepressants and other aphrodisiacs, of course. Was there ever any doubt? It all started because Sarah asked for Garrett’s thoughts, as a CPAP user, on a recent Saturday Night Live mock ad for the medical device. Yes, Garrett had opinions, less about that skit itself than the extremely odd phenomenon of actual innuendo-laden CPAP advertisement. So many adoring wives, giving come hither looks to their elephant-masked heavy breathing spouses. We’ll share some examples below, because oh buddy. How’d we eventually get to the antidepressant part? Well, you have to listen to the episode for that.
Also, do you like episodes like this? Well, you know who gets more of them? Paid subscribers. The absolute best folks around, if you ask us.
Ready for some CPAP ads? If you’re reading this on any non-Substack podcast ep, mozey over to this post at thisweekinbreeders.org and enjoy!
This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.thisweekinbreeders.org/subscribe
How well do you know your man... osphere?
Thursday, March 26, 2026 • Duration 01:32:38
Man oh manosphere. Odds are, you’ve heard that there’s a wildly popular Louis Theroux documentary on Netflix these days, one where the extremely British documentarian spends an ungodly amount of time with prominent reactionary dude influencers. Garrett watched it, Sarah didn’t, so join along as he takes her on a journey through a strange world of washboard abs, one-way monogamy and, well, some of the worst imaginable opinions and actions. The big question: Do we really need to spend time with these guys? Or is there a more interesting story right outside the frame.
This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit
What We Talk About When We Talk About Genders Talking
Thursday, November 6, 2025 • Duration 01:14:23
We’re back! And we’re still talking friendship dynamics. You have probably heard the trope about how, when out with their friends, ladies love to talk about their feelings and fellas just want to name baseball players they remember from when they were twelve. Is it essentialist? Sure, but also…it sure feels like there’s some truth there.
This week, we hold the trope up and look at it from as many angles as possible, like a gorgeous gendered diamond. Does Garrett host a makeshift version of the Newlywed game for Sarah and her husband? Does Sarah reveal some surprisingly nuanced thoughts about “Waterfalls” by TLC? And somehow, by the end of the episode, do we discover a new lasagna-based benchmark by which to judge the quality of male friendship? Yes, yes and yes.
It’s fun, you all. And we probably don’t talk too much about Tony Shalhoub’s mustache, though that’s debatable.
Lots of firsts in this episode! It’s the first bonus episode where free subscribers can hear a sample to help decide if they want to make the jump. But more importantly, it’s the first bonus episode where we ask each other the same question. This week, we talk recess. Namely, our own recess memories. What we did, with whom, and whether it was gender-cod…
Maybe the Real Gender Was the Friends We Made Along the Way
Thursday, October 23, 2025 • Duration 01:04:50
Oh, you just knew that we were going to do a “can men and women be friends?” episode. But we’re not quite doing it in the classic romantic comedy way (meaning, we’re not asking “will the innate sexual tension between straight men and women get in the way of friendship?”). No, we’re far too middle-aged for that. This is more of a “can man and women be friends? In this economy?” conversation. Like, how have each of us done at keeping up friendships as we’ve aged? When has that been easier and harder (both intra and inter gender)? And who, in our life, does the emotional and physical work of friendship?
You probably have a guess as to the answer to that last one, but this was a super layered and vulnerable conversation (lots of friendship guilt from both of us, and also some actual READING OF THE COMMENTS, INCLUDING THE RUDE ONES, in response to Sarah’s essay on this topic). Oh, and we also imagined a premium tier where Sarah comes to your house and ruins your dinner. Fun!
* This Week In Breeders is a podcast! And you can listen to it wherever you like to listen to podcasts Apple; Spotify; in homeroom, whilst passing “do you like me? check yes or no” notes to your would-be best friend)
This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit
But What if the Lady-Candidate... Liked Beer and Football?!?
Thursday, October 9, 2025 • Duration 01:10:41
Friends, this will likely come as a surprise, but we crunched the numbers and it appears as if some of our political choices are… influenced by gender. “Wait, what?” you’re no doubt saying, but yes, it’s true, and we’re on the case.
In this episode, your stalwart TWIB team tackles the dark arts of American electoral politics. Our question: What does it take for a candidate (of any gender) to be considered “authentic” and “relatable?” Also: why is it that even many of us who have purchased multiple Little Feminist books for our households still default to “tough talking dudes” when it comes time to punch our ballots? Plus: how do you get all the text messages to stop (just kidding, we didn’t discuss that; everybody knows that they’ll never stop, that long after this planet implodes you’ll still get a text saying “[INSERT NAME], WE’RE IN TROUBLE.”). But still, there’s lots of fun stuff here: we watch some ads, we yell at Gavin Newsom (of course) and Sarah does an admirable job of trying to steer the conversation towards 90s R & B.
This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit
Are you a Rock or a Rocket?
Thursday, September 25, 2025 • Duration 01:09:17
This Episode:
This week’s episode is a particular barnburner. For our inaugural deep dive into this moment in heterosexual marriage/parenting/ephemara, we’re going to camp! We’re talking gender socialization (always), but also personality taxonomies, and whether they’re forces for good or evil; Fair Play cards, and where they do and don’t get us; and of course, what we mean by all this Rock and Rocket business (in case you’re wondering, a lady rocket is a Rockette, because we have decreed it to be so). Also, don’t worry, we definitely wrap things up by objectifying at least one cartoon character (that’s the This Week In Breeders promise!).
What’s this? A podcast? Thank God somebody finally thought of having one of those. But wait, this one is different. We’ve got two hosts, a fella AND a lady. That’s the kind of innovation you can expect from us over at This Week In Breeders HQ.
This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit
Men lie, women lie, but This Week In Breeders will never lie (especially not to Gen Z)
Thursday, March 12, 2026 • Duration 01:19:46
Oh wow. What great faces we’re making in that thumbnail image. It looks like we’re extremely concerned.
And with good reason, actually, because this week we too are considering whether the kids all right. Hard to say, honestly. On one hand, there’s a new poll out that reveals that Gen Z men have more conservative politics than their grandfathers. And oh buddy are there far too many bad faith dude whisperers trying to convince young fellas to join the He Man Women Hater’s Club. But the Breeders can’t help but root for our slightly younger compatriots. We too are figuring it out.
This was a fun episode. Sarah interviewed Garrett about a recent piece he wrote about that study. This dovetailed into a discussion of a critique that Garrett often gets, when he makes arguments about how it’s more important for guys to care about being better neighbors than being “better men.” Namely, that young guys aren’t going to listen to all that potluck-based pablum. What if they need somebody to appeal directly to their manhood? What if they’ll ignore folks like Garrett who aren’t willing to talk to them about masculinity specifically?
Interesting questions, for sure. Pretty good fodder for a podcast, actually.
Also discussed: Various places Andie Macdowell has lived; whether the movie Groundhog Day holds up; Garrett’s birthday (and the best age to have a birthday); Garrett’s entire taxonomy of the manosphere in less than five minutes; Sarah’s first ever boundary; a movie that is not out in theaters yet but that Sarah has already pre-analyzed; consensual open mouth stranger kissing… and a very bizarre novelty t-shirt.
This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit
Coming of age... with the Breeders
Thursday, February 26, 2026 • Duration 01:33:17
Ready to go for a ride? We’re covering some ground today: Two co-hosts. Reminiscing about four moments in their lives. Rapid fire (well, rapid fire with tangents). I think you’ll pick up the format pretty quickly, but the basic idea is that we each remembered back to when we were 5, 15, 25 and 35 and reflected on who, during that time, was our model for how to be a man or a woman. As we yelled out loud (with airhorn) on the episode… IT’S A JOINT REFLECTIVE EXERCISE.
You know what was interesting about this? Just about everything. The two of us know each other pretty darn well. And yet, we were surprised and intrigued in a new way. Should you try this with your friends? Oh yeah. And as Sarah mentioned, we also wouldn’t hate it if you wanted to share some of these reflections with us as well.
Topics discussed: Claire Danes, the 1987 Jefferson County (Montana) Cross Country Team, trying on your mom’s clothes, vicarious keg stands, older siblings, the motherhood internet, our moms, our dads, literally taking bites out of Infinite Jest, and of course, getting knocked down, and getting up again, because you’re never gonna keep us down.
Links:
* An Instagram reel (from Garrett) about what he packs for kids at his speaking events.
* If you’re ever in Oakland when Sarah and her husband are hosting trivia, you should go!
* Edge of Seventeen by Stevie Nicks (a much better remembered real song!).
* The trailer for Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (since you don’t have the opportunity to watch the 1987 Jefferson High School Cross Country video).
This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit
The stars are out for mixed-gender feminist podcasting's most glamorous event of the year
Thursday, February 12, 2026 • Duration 01:47:23
You all! It’s here! Our most anticipated episode of the year (according to the two of us, and only the two of us). The This Week In Breeders Oscars Spectacular.
Friends, there was so much gender in the movies last year. There were women having mental breakdowns and/or founding religions. There were men (so many men) being sad, playing sad baseball, doing sad art heists, reanimating sad corpses, making sad albums about the death of the American dream, becoming dads, being sad about being dads, realizing they were sad dads and it was time to suddenly become happy dads… truly, so much gender (especially that one gender). Also, there was at least one movie that truly changed Sarah’s life, and also a couple guys we’d definitely let babysit our kids (all our love to you, Benicio Del Toro, and also the sweet projectionist Grandpa in The Secret Agent).
Plus: The greatest surprise gift/musical interlude in podcasting history? Potentially! You need to listen to the end! We’re not just saying that!
This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit
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* Too many people (Garrett included) have opinions about the fox and bunny’s relationship in Zootopia 2.
More:
* This Week In Breeders is a podcast! And you can listen to it wherever you like to listen to podcasts (Apple; Spotify; at the gym, where you’re working to turn your soy arms into tempeh arms).
* But if you really want to stay updated, you should go to thisweekinbreeders.org and subscribe, so that you get episodes delivered directly to your inbox.
* And then, after you do so, you should be like “but now I really want to support this podcast, and I’d also love to listen to their bonus episodes, like the recent one, where we were brave enough to ask POLYAMORY OR MOVING TO THE MIDWEST,” opt for apaid subscription.
* Or maybe you want another way to help us out, which is very kind of you. Would you consider dropping us one of those five star reviews on your preferred podcast app? Or telling your friends? Thank you!
* Were you curious as to Boomer humor columnist Dave Barry’s take on Mankeeping? Well, he’s got one!
* Sarah Wheeler’s favorite TLC songs (Spotify) (Publisher’s note: Sarah DOES have a fifth favorite TLC song, and it is “Case of the Fake People.” Glad we set the record straight!)
* This Week In Breeders is a podcast! And you can listen to it wherever you like to listen to podcasts (Apple; Spotify; everywhere that groups of men get together and wordlessly grunt their non-feelings at each other).
* But if you really want to stay updated, you should go to thisweekinbreeders.org and subscribe, so that you get episodes delivered directly to your inbox.
* And then, after you do so, you should be like “but now I really want to support this podcast, and I’d also love to listen to their bonus episodes, like the really incredible one they just did about how they used to spend recesses in elementary school” and opt for apaid subscription.
* Or maybe you want another way to help us out, which is very kind of you. Would you consider dropping us one of those five star reviews on your preferred podcast app? Or telling your friends? Thank you!
* But if you really want to stay updated, you should go to thisweekinbreeders.org and subscribe, so that you get episodes delivered directly to your inbox.
* And then, after you do so, you should be like “but now I really want to support this podcast, and I’d also love to listen to their bonus episodes, like the one they just did about Berkeley moms vs. Oakland moms” and opt for apaid subscription.
* Or maybe you want another way to help us out, which is very kind of you. Would you consider dropping us one of those five star reviews on your preferred podcast app? Or telling your friends? Thank you!
* This Week In Breeders is a podcast! And you can listen to it wherever you like to listen to podcasts (Apple; Spotify; at the very end of a political convention, long after the crowds have left and the janitors are sweeping up the balloons and the AV intern mercifully turns off the playlist just as the last notes of “Fight Song” filter through the empty hall).
* But if you really want to stay updated, you should go to thisweekinbreeders.org and subscribe, so that you get episodes delivered directly to your inbox.
* And then, after you do so, you should be like “but now I really want to support this podcast, and I’d also love to listen to their bonus episodes, like the one they just did about Field of Dreams and pastel razors and trad wives and Hungry Man dinners” and opt for apaid subscription.
* Or maybe you want another way to help us out, which is very kind of you. Would you consider dropping us one of those five star reviews on your preferred podcast app? Or telling your friends? Thank you!
What else can you expect? The best darn conversations about gender that we’re capable of offering, at a time when jeez louise there is so much Gender To Discuss.
Please listen! And spread the word! But before you go and do so, some business!
* Where can you listen? Anywhere you find podcasts. Apple. Spotify. Deep in the darkest woods, underneath a mossy rock, where you whisper your secrets. And also right here.
* Subscribe! We’re not always going to announce every episode on our individual newsletters, so becoming a subscriber to this one specifically will ensure that you don’t miss an episode.
* How frequently will episodes come out? Initially, we’re aiming for once every other week, but we’ll see. It won’t be overwhelming. We’re going to do these for a while (how long, we’ll see?) and then take a break when it feels reasonable. Doesn’t that sound relaxed and
* Speaking of subscribing, we highly recommend becoming a PAID SUBSCRIBER, because (a). we literally are paying for this out of pocket and we may or may not have talked to our spouses about that impact on our respective familial budgets (b). while this first episode is completely free, future episodes will frequently be either fully or partially paywalled. Another subscription? In this economy? Yes, we know, but the good news is that Sarah and Garrett both have a hefty discount code that we’ll be offering to existing subscribers of our newsletters:Sarah Wheeler’s Momspreading or The White Pages. Stay tuned for those links (though we also appreciate all of you who want to subscribe to the podcast alone).
* But, and if you subscribe to all three (Sarah’s newsletter, Garrett’s newsletter and the podcast), Garrett will send you not one but two pieces of cool merch that he made (this design on a shirt or a tote and/or a very hip hat that says POTLUCKS! on it). Just toss him an email (garrett at barnraisersproject.org).
* Elvis Presley, who, whether we want to admit it or not, embodies how both Sarah and Garrett would act on stage if they were international pop superstars.
* This Week In Breeders is a podcast! And you can listen to it wherever you like to listen to podcasts (Apple; Spotify; the very feminism-friendly DJ booth at Tufts University in the late 1990s, etc.).
* But if you really want to stay updated, you should go to thisweekinbreeders.org and subscribe, so that you get episodes delivered directly to your inbox.
* And then, after you do so, you should be like “but now I really want to support this podcast, and I’d also love to listen to their bonus episodes, like the recent one where Sarah Wheeler shared what snacks she sneaks into movies and also asked Garrett “‘so, does your wife dress you?'” opt for apaid subscription.
* Or maybe you want another way to help us out, which is very kind of you. Would you consider dropping us one of those five star reviews on your preferred podcast app? Or telling your friends? Thank you!
* Garrett does not need this very expensive Testament of Ann Lee shirt (and Ann Lee would be disappointed in him if he did buy it), but you can understand why he’s torn, right?
* Most importantly of all: The complete lyrics to “Gonna be hostin,” so that you too can sing along when Sarah performs it live on stage at the Oscars.
* Garrett would like to offer his apologies for mixing up the Skarsgards, and also for calling Ronald Bronstein “Richard,” but appreciates that Sarah was able to correct him.
* BREAKING NEWS: The number of living Shakers (reported by us as two) HAS RISEN TO THREE! LET’S GOOOOOO!
More:
* This Week In Breeders is a podcast! And you can listen to it wherever you like to listen to podcasts (Apple; Spotify; in your gothic bell tower where you reanimate corpses).
* But if you really want to stay updated, you should go to thisweekinbreeders.org and subscribe, so that you get episodes delivered directly to your inbox.
* Or maybe you want another way to help us out, which is very kind of you. Would you consider dropping us one of those five star reviews on your preferred podcast app? Or telling your friends? Thank you!
