They Mess You Up with Dr. Ciara Kelly and Dr. Richard Hogan – Details, episodes & analysis

Why do siblings trigger us more than anyone else? Relationships can be shaped by comparison, labels, and family roles that follow us into adulthood.

In this episode, Ciara and Richard Hogan unpack sibling rivalry, “family boxes,” and how to build healthier, more connected relationships at any age.

Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod

They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday.

From betrayal and secrecy to rebuilding trust, communication, and a sense of self.

Follow the pod and get in touch on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod

They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan - taking on the issues that people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday.

A topic few people talk about: when a parent doesn’t like their child. In this episode Dr. Richard Hogan and Dr. Ciara Kelly explore why this can happen, from personality clashes to deeper issues. They look at how emotional distance and constant criticism affect a child’s self-esteem and ability to trust. And dig into what’s really behind these difficult parent child dynamics. 

Follow the pod on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod where you can also get in touch.

They Mess You Up! Taking on the issues that people struggle with behind closed doors.
New episode every Wednesday.

In this thought-provoking and final episode of season 1, Dr. Richard Hogan and Dr. Ciara Kelly delve into the complex world of technology and its impact on adolescents. With the ubiquitous presence of smartphones, they explore the challenges parents face in guiding their children through this digital landscape, where connection often comes with isolation and heightened anxiety. Join them as they discuss the emotional turmoil of adolescence, the significance of setting boundaries, and the pervasive nature of online bullying and harmful content. Richard shares personal anecdotes that resonate deeply, emphasizing the need for open communication and understanding during these formative years.

In the first episode of 2025, Dr. Ciara Kelly and Dr. Richard Hogan dive into the topic of New Year's resolutions and the futility of punitive self-improvement goals. They discuss the high failure rates of common resolutions and why setting oneself up for a "new year, new me" can lead to feelings of hopelessness. Instead of purging negative habits, Ciara and Richard advocate for the power of positive reinforcement and self-acceptance. Tune in as they share insights on building sustainable habits, distinguishing triggers, and cultivating a kinder internal dialogue. Discover how embracing yourself can lead to genuine growth and fulfillment.

In this festive Christmas special, Dr. Ciara Kelly and Dr. Richard Hogan tackle the often challenging dynamics of family gatherings. Whether you're returning home to your parents or hosting your in-laws, the pressure can be intense. Join Ciara and Richard as they explore the emotional layers of Christmas, touching on childhood roles and family expectations that can resurface during the holidays. They dive into how old wounds can flare up and share practical tips for navigating difficult conversations, setting boundaries, and injecting more joy into the season. Discover how to shift your mindset and respond differently to family dynamics, allowing yourself to enjoy the good moments amidst the chaos.

In this revealing episode, Dr. Ciara Kelly and Dr. Richard Hogan shine a light on the often-taboo subject of sex addiction. They discusses the emotional isolation and shame that accompany this hidden struggle, sharing real experiences and insights into its deeper roots, often linked to childhood trauma. Join Ciara and Richard as they explore the complexities of sexual compulsions, the impact on relationships, and the harsh societal stigmas surrounding this addiction. Offering practical advice, they guide listeners through steps towards recovery, emphasizing compassion, open communication, and the importance of intimacy in navigating these challenges.

In this eye-opening episode, Dr. Ciara Kelly and Dr. Richard Hogan tackle a subject that affects many: narcissism. With an influx of emails from listeners, Ciara and Richard delve into the nuances of narcissistic behavior, exploring how it permeates our relationships with family, friends, partners, and colleagues. The duo breaks down the traits of narcissism, the impact it has on others, and the often-destructive patterns that emerge in interpersonal dynamics. Learn about the tell-tale signs of narcissistic behavior, from love bombing to a lack of empathy, and discover strategies for self-protection and navigating these complex relationships.

Dr. Ciara Kelly and Dr. Richard Hogan discuss the intricate world of dating, especially for those re-entering the scene after a long-term relationship, divorce, or loss. They address the fears and anxieties surrounding the prospect of finding love again, shedding light on the emotional baggage we often carry with us. Join Ciara and Richard as they tackle societal pressures, the dynamics of body confidence, and the importance of being open rather than desperate.