Explore every episode of the podcast The Terrible Creative
| Title | Pub. Date | Duration | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Photographers Can Be D*cks (But You Don’t Have to Be One) | 22 Apr 2025 | 00:17:59 | |
Patrick calls out the toxic gatekeeping culture that's suffocating creativity in photography — and offers a better way forward for anyone tired of comment-section warriors and gear snobs who've confused being an asshole with having standards.
From unsolicited critique bros to insecure middle-aged men treating Instagram like academic journals, photography has a gatekeeping problem. This episode explores why photographers can be unnecessarily cruel, how it stems from fear and insecurity, and why the most successful photographers are actually the most generous. Patrick shares his own experience of being publicly torn apart for a simple business post, reveals his moments of being "that guy" himself, and introduces a framework for filtering feedback that could revolutionize how you handle criticism.
The Gatekeeping Problem
The Psychology Behind Photographer Dickishness
The Feedback Filtering System
What Successful Photographers Actually Do
Say something kind. Find a photographer whose work you genuinely admire and tell them why — specifically, thoughtfully. Offer encouragement to someone newer than you instead of unsolicited advice. And if you catch yourself about to post that clever criticism, that technical correction, that snarky observation — pause. Ask yourself: Is this making the photography community better, or am I just trying to feel superior?
Credits Music provided by and licensed through Artist.io Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes every two weeks. Choose the kind of photographer you want to be — choose the one who lifts others up. | |||
| You’re Not Terrible, You’re Just Early - Why showing up bad is the only way to get good | 22 Apr 2025 | 00:19:48 | |
Welcome to the first episode of The Terrible Photographer — a podcast for working photographers and creative humans who are done with fake positivity, influencer bullshit, and pretending they have it all figured out.
Patrick shares the brutal Clubhouse critique that sparked this entire podcast, explores why "terrible" might be the most important phase of your creative development, and introduces the psychological framework every photographer needs to understand: Mount Stupid vs. The Valley of Despair. This episode sets the foundation for the entire series — examining the messy, honest, human side of making art while trying to survive.
The Clubhouse Origin Story
Creative Confidence vs. Competence
Building Authentic Confidence
The Psychology of Creative Growth
Make something you're not sure about. Not something you know will perform. Make something that's unfinished, too personal, a little uncomfortable. Then sit with it and ask yourself — what am I actually trying to say with this? You don't have to post it. You don't have to show anyone. But make it. Because that's the muscle you need to build — the willingness to be terrible in service of something true.
Patrick is a commercial photographer who shoots brands, portraits, and campaigns. He's also someone who spends an embarrassing amount of time questioning whether what he's making actually matters. Previously lead photographer at Taylor Guitars, Patrick has experienced both the creative highs and soul-crushing lows of working in the photography industry.
Music provided by and licensed through Artist.io Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes every two weeks. If this episode hit somewhere between doubt and inspiration, share it with a fellow creative who's out there trying to figure it out too. We're just getting started — and we're glad you found it. | |||
| Trailer | 22 Apr 2025 | 00:02:02 | |
This is The Terrible Creative. A show about what it actually costs to make things for a living. The tension between the privilege of doing work you love and the frustration of an industry that keeps moving the floor. The patterns, the irritants, and the internal questions creatives aren't supposed to ask in public. Hosted by Patrick Fore, commercial photographer based in San Diego. If your identity is tangled up in what you create, you're in the right place. New episodes every Tuesday. Follow the show so you don't miss it. Read the book: https://www.terriblephotographer.com/the-book Podcast written, produced, and hosted by Patrick Fore Music licensed through Epidemic Sound and Blue Dot Sessions. Recorded from my garage in San Diego, California | |||
| Your Brain is the Biggest Dick - Photographers Can Be Dicks – Part 2 | 23 Apr 2025 | 00:21:34 | |
In this raw and unflinching episode, Patrick explores the psychology behind creative self-doubt and why your inner critic might be the biggest obstacle to your growth. Drawing from neuroscience research and brutally honest personal stories, this episode tackles the uncomfortable truths about self-criticism that most creative podcasts won't touch. Warning: This episode contains frank discussions about mental health, financial anxiety, and the psychological realities of creative work. It's designed for mature audiences who want real talk, not feel-good platitudes.
The Neuroscience of Self-Sabotage
The Economics of Self-Doubt
Uncomfortable Truths About Creative Culture
Practical Damage Control
"Your inner critic isn't sharpening you. It's using you. It doesn't want better art. It wants blood." "Sometimes we choose misery because it's familiar. Because if we fail while already hating ourselves, at least we saw it coming." "The critic doesn't need to scream anymore. It just quietly assumes the worst, and you've stopped arguing with it." "You're not short on skill. You're short on the courage to suck long enough to get good."
Pick a project you've been avoiding because it scares you. Set a timer for one hour and work on it without judgment. When the inner critic starts up, acknowledge it and keep moving. When the timer goes off, stop—no evaluation, no spiraling. Bonus challenge: Reach out to a client who went radio silent after you delivered work. Ask how they liked it. You might be surprised by the answer.
Resources Mentioned
Connect If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone who needs to hear it. Mental health in creative industries matters, and these conversations save careers—and sometimes lives. Website: http://terriblephotographer.com
Music provided by and licensed through Artist.io Note: This podcast is obviously not a substitute for professional mental health treatment. If you're struggling with persistent negative thoughts or depression, please consult a qualified mental health professional. | |||
| No Secret Sauce: Just Show Up (How Careers Are Actually Built) | 24 Apr 2025 | 00:11:46 | |
You’re not missing a magic lens. There’s no course, preset pack, or algorithm trick that’s secretly holding you back. The truth is less glamorous — but way more powerful. In this episode, Patrick peels back the myth of overnight success and calls out the industry’s obsession with shortcuts. Through stories from world-class kitchens, overlooked jazz clubs, and forgotten film sets, he explores why consistency beats charisma — and how real careers are built, not handed out. If you’ve ever wondered when your “break” is coming, this one’s for you. What You’ll Hear
Creative Challenge Audit your last 5 shoots. Did you…
No shame. Just an invitation to recommit. This isn’t about perfection. It’s about muscle memory. Credits: Field Notes is what you take home. A weekly companion letter from Patrick: behind-the-scenes mess, creative prompts, and human reminders — all bullshit-free. | |||
| Dim, Not Done - Burnout, Breakdown, and the Slow Road Back | 01 May 2025 | 00:21:45 | |
This one’s personal. In this episode, Patrick shares the story of a full-blown burnout that ended behind a dumpster — and why it didn’t start there. We talk about what burnout really looks like (spoiler: it’s not just being tired), how the body reacts to prolonged stress, and how that quiet voice telling you you’ve “lost it” might just be your nervous system waving a white flag. With insight from Dr. Michelle Hagel, a breakdown of chronic fight-or-flight, and a challenge for anyone teetering on the edge, this episode is for the creatives who feel dim — but aren’t done. If you’ve been wondering why the spark is fading, or if you’ll ever feel like yourself again… this one’s for you. Credits Subscribe to Field Notes The podcast is the campfire, Field Notes is what you take home. Field Notes is the weekly email companion to this podcast, one part creative letter, one part behind-the-scenes mess, all bullshit-free. | |||
| Still Here - Why Resilience Is a Creative Act | 29 Apr 2025 | 00:16:23 | |
This week’s episode isn’t about trends, trolls, or gear. It’s about something quieter — the part of you that refuses to give up, even when the work feels impossible. We explore the idea of creative resistance, the myth of “falling behind,” and why showing up (even in small ways) is its own kind of creative power. There’s a story about trees, Biosphere 2, and why life’s “wind” might be shaping you more than you think. We also talk about:
This one’s for anyone who’s tired, unsure, or just needs a reminder that still being here — still caring, still seeing — is enough. Credits Subscribe to Field Notes The podcast is the campfire, Field Notes is what you take home. Field Notes is the weekly email companion to this podcast, one part creative letter, one part behind-the-scenes mess, all bullshit-free. | |||
| My Friend Hue - Seeing Color as Emotion, Language, and Power | 06 May 2025 | 00:25:05 | |
this episode is a love letter to color. Not just as an aesthetic choice—but as psychology, science, culture, and storytelling. We start with a fictional moment on a busy New York City street, then dive into a 5-minute crash course on color theory (Bill Nye style), unpack cultural associations across time and geography, and land on practical ways to use color intentionally in your work. Whether you’re new to photography or 10 years deep into your career, this episode will challenge you to see color not as decoration, but as direction. You’ll also hear vintage narration clips from the 1998 documentary Light, Darkness and Colours. For more info, visit the Top Documentary Films page. Plus: old-school science film voiceovers, an Ira Glass-style segue, and a dad joke buried in the ad break. You’re welcome. Subscribe to Field Notes The podcast is the campfire, Field Notes is what you take home. Field Notes is the weekly email companion to this podcast, one part creative letter, one part behind-the-scenes mess, all bullshit-free. Creative Challenge: Use Adobe Color to explore a single color palette. Build an entire image—or image series—around it. Let color drive your lighting, styling, and emotional arc. Music Credit: 🎵 “Color” by Wesley Jensen & The Penny Arcade – used with permission via Musicbed. Stay Connected: Follow the new Instagram feed at @terriblephotographer or visit www.terriblephotographer.com to join the newsletter and get the first chapter of the upcoming book. | |||
| Copy Machine - On Imitation, Identity, and Making Work That’s Actually Yours | 13 May 2025 | 00:28:45 | |
We all start by imitating. That’s human. But somewhere along the line, many of us stopped making work we love — and started making work that just looks like it belongs to someone else.
🌀 Creative Challenge: If you stopped caring what other photographers thought of your work—if you weren't trying to impress them, join their communities, or earn their validation—what would your photography actually look like? Subscribe to Field Notes The podcast is the campfire, Field Notes is what you take home. Field Notes is the weekly email companion to this podcast, one part creative letter, one part behind-the-scenes mess, all bullshit-free. Not what your clients want. Not what the algorithm rewards. Not what workshops taught you. But what would you create if the only person you needed to please was yourself?
📸 Follow: @TerriblePhotographer | |||
| Insider/Outsider - Surviving the Creative Industry | 01 Jul 2025 | 00:32:04 | |
What happens when you still love photography but start to wonder if there’s any place left for you in the industry? In this raw, vulnerable episode, Patrick Fore gets brutally honest about what it means to be a working photographer in 2025. From a moment of personal crisis in a cluttered garage to the soul-draining grind of cold outreach and algorithm-chasing, this episode pulls back the curtain on the emotional and existential cost of staying in the game. You’ll hear:
Whether you’re a full-time freelancer, a weekend warrior, or someone questioning the whole damn thing, this episode isn’t about pretending. It’s about naming the mess, wrestling with it, and finding a way to keep going. 📬 Subscribe to Field Notes, the weekly companion to the podcast: https://www.terriblephotographer.com 💬 Let’s connect: Instagram @TerriblePhotographer Newsletter: Field Notes (via Substack) Book: Lessons From a Terrible Photographer (coming soon) Credits: This episode contains a referenced clip from “How to enter ‘flow state’ on command” by Steven Kotler for Big Think (Watch here) and a short excerpt (under 30 seconds) from Pixar’s Soul, used to illustrate the concept of creative flow. Music provided by and licensed through Artlist.io. | |||
| Why Shapes How - On Intention, Execution, and the Lie of Objectivity | 24 Jun 2025 | 00:30:01 | |
Episode Title: Why Shapes How On Intention, Execution, and the Lie of Objectivity Description: You can nail the lighting. Get the shot. Hit all the settings. But if you don’t know why you’re making the image, it’s just visual noise. In this episode of The Terrible Photographer Podcast, we dig into the lie at the heart of modern photography — that technical mastery is the pinnacle of the craft. It’s not. Intent is. And most people are scared of it. We talk motorcycle maintenance, emotionally hollow images, and what happens when a “family photo session” turns into something that actually means something. Whether you shoot portraits, weddings, branding, or weird experimental self-portraits at 2am with a desk lamp, this episode is a reminder: your camera doesn’t make meaning. You do. Inside this episode:
Want to go deeper? Sign up for Field Notes — a free weekly email for photographers who want something more honest than gear reviews and Instagram hacks. When you sign up, you’ll get the first chapter of my book Lessons From a Terrible Photographer — in PDF andaudio, delivered straight to your inbox. 👉 Get it at www.terriblephotographer.com Credits:
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| Tear Gas & Pixels - What protest photography teaches us about truth, power, and not looking away. | 14 Jun 2025 | 00:30:47 | |
This episode wasn’t planned. But with federal troops deployed in Los Angeles, students arrested, immigrants targeted, and journalists silenced — it felt dishonest to pretend everything was normal. In this special essay-style episode, I explore the role of photography in moments of protest and power:
I also share a powerful on-the-ground reflection from LA-based photographer @chelsealaurenla, whose words remind us that not everything makes the news, but it still matters. If you’ve ever questioned whether photography can change anything… this one’s for you. Mentions & Resources:
Stay Connected:
The podcast is the campfire, Field Notes is what you take home. Field Notes is the weekly email companion to this podcast, one part creative letter, one part behind-the-scenes mess, all bullshit-free. Learn more about the project at: If this episode meant something to you, leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps more than you know. | |||
| The Revolt - Why Your Creative Rebellion is Failing | 10 Jun 2025 | 00:32:13 | |
At some point, every artist has to choose: Keep making work that gets likes. Or make work that actually says something. This is an episode about the quiet uprising. The moment you stop painting for the academy. The moment you realize you’re not burned out from doing too much, you’re burned out from doing too much that means nothing. We start with a true (and strange) story from 1863, when fourteen painters staged a creative rebellion and changed the art world forever. And then we bring it back to you. To now. To that feeling you get when you scroll your own grid and wonder if any of it matters. If any of it’s even yours. This is The Revolt. Not with swords. With silence. With risk. With art that doesn’t beg for applause. Subscribe to Field Notes The podcast is the campfire, Field Notes is what you take home. Field Notes is the weekly email companion to this podcast, one part creative letter, one part behind-the-scenes mess, all bullshit-free. 📬 Join the conversation on Substack We’re building a community of artists who are tired of the hustle and hungry for something real. → terriblephotographer.substack.com 🎧 Music licensed via Art List Header photo stolen lovingly from Wikipedia. Don’t tell the Louvre. 🙏 Rate & Review Currently stuck behind How to Build a Photography Empire in 6 Weeks and just above Lens Cap ASMR. You can help change that. Rate the show. Leave a review. Make the robots notice us. | |||
| The Silence - When the work goes quiet, what is it trying to say? | 03 Jun 2025 | 00:27:47 | |
This week, I throw out the episode I was planning and respond to an email from Carri, a baby photographer from Michigan, whose words hit like a punch in the face. We’re talking about a different kind of burnout. Not from hustle, but from creative absence. From stillness. From not getting to do the thing you love. This is for the photographers, and all creatives, who feel the slow ache when the work dries up, and the silence gets loud. If you’ve ever questioned your worth when the gigs disappeared, this one’s for you. This Week’s Light Leak: “The Work I Would Love to Make” Find one image, anywhere (Pinterest, a book, a magazine, Instagram), that captures the kind of work you wish you were making if you had no restraints. No budget. No client. No algorithm to please. Then describe it. Not visually, use words. Mood, tone, feeling, intention. The goal isn’t to recreate the image. It’s to tap into the honesty of what you want to say through your work—whether that scares you or not. This is where we begin. Subscribe to Field Notes The podcast is the campfire, Field Notes is what you take home. Field Notes is the weekly email companion to this podcast, one part creative letter, one part behind-the-scenes mess, all bullshit-free. 👉 Sign up at terriblephotographer.com Mentions & Links:
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| Stinky Dead Mouse - Why most portfolios all look the same, and how to stop being everyone else. | 27 May 2025 | 00:27:35 | |
You ever clean your entire house and still smell something rotting? This episode is about that. Except the smell is coming from your portfolio. In Episode 10, we’re talking creative decay — that slow, invisible rot that sets in when your work looks good but feels dead. From personal stories (including one involving a bathtub and a topless model reading Vogue) to a breakdown of the 60/40 Rule for survival, this is a brutally honest reflection on boredom, brand, and the danger of playing it safe for too long. We dig into:
If you’ve ever looked at your own work and felt… nothing? Subscribe to Field Notes The podcast is the campfire, Field Notes is what you take home. Field Notes is the weekly email companion to this podcast, one part creative letter, one part behind-the-scenes mess, all bullshit-free.
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| Pillow Talk - The emotional and economic toll of creative work. | 20 May 2025 | 00:28:39 | |
Some nights, what keeps you up isn't anxiety, it’s the quiet ache of misalignment. In this episode, we dive into the emotional and economic toll of creative work: the burnout, the spirals, the slow erosion of joy when your art becomes your paycheck. Patrick opens up about nearly quitting photography, the paradox of making a living off your creativity, and what it really means to protect your spark in a world that constantly demands more. We explore Rick Rubin’s philosophy of creativity as a muscle, not a resource to be drained, but a force to be nurtured. If you’ve ever felt the tension between your soul work and your client work, this one’s for you. You’re not behind. Credits Subscribe to Field Notes The podcast is the campfire, Field Notes is what you take home. Field Notes is the weekly email companion to this podcast, one part creative letter, one part behind-the-scenes mess, all bullshit-free. Featuring music by: | |||
| Angry - A brutally honest episode about creative burnout, anger, and the choice to keep going. | 08 Jul 2025 | 00:25:33 | |
Everyone loves a comeback story. But what about the part where you’re just… sitting in a garage at 2 a.m., surrounded by half-charged batteries, broken gear, and a growing sense that something inside you might be cracking?
Opening Song:
Support the band at: americanmary.com All other music provided by: Mentioned in the Episode:
Subscribe to the Newsletter + Get the Free Download: Want more of this kind of honest, no-BS creative conversation? Subscribe to The Terrible Newsletter and get The Darkroom — a free digital download about making real work in dark seasons. | |||
| The Technician - When the identity you built starts to crumble, what do you build next? | 15 Jul 2025 | 00:31:18 | |
"I thought the work would save me. I was grossly mistaken." What happens when a stranger on Clubhouse calls you a technician instead of an artist? Patrick breaks down the brutal midnight conversation that cracked open everything he thought he knew about his photography career. From the golden handcuffs of corporate work to the humbling reality of freelancing for $650, this episode is about dismantling the fantasy of what creative success looks like. No metaphors. No inspiration porn. Just the uncomfortable truth about technical skill versus authentic voice, and why sometimes the thing you think defines you is actually limiting you.
In this episode:
Light Leak: A Creative Check-In Are you being hired for your vision, or just your ability to mimic someone else’s? Grab The Darkroom – a free guide to creative clarity and finding your artistic voice terriblephotographer.com/darkroom-download Music licensed via Artlist.io Audio excerpt from Conan O’Brien’s farewell message on The Tonight Show (2010). Used under fair use for commentary and inspiration. All rights belong to NBC/Universal. Subscribe, support, or scream into the void at: terriblephotographer.com Email me: patrick@terriblephotographer.com – I’m always interested to hear your thoughts, ideas, and read hate mail. I respond to every message. Follow: @patrickfore & @terriblephotographer | |||
| The Light Hits Back - What if the worst thing for your art… is being seen? | 17 Jul 2025 | 00:17:29 | |
What happens when the thing you made in the dark suddenly ends up in the spotlight? This week, Patrick gets personal about the strange pressure of being “featured,” and why attention might be the most creatively dangerous drug of all. From a viral photo in the dunes to the slow collapse of chasing relevance, this episode dives into the algorithm’s indifference to honesty, the myth of momentum, and what Johnny Cash’s American Recordings can still teach us about making art that matters. This is for the ones who still believe in disappearing. In pausing. In letting the light hit you… without immediately bottling it. Includes a clip from “The Beast in Me” by Johnny Cash (used with reverence, not profit). All other music licensed via Artist.io. Episode photograph by Casey Horner — Instagram: @mischievous_penguins. | |||
| The Job I Hate The Least - Because photography isn’t about the photos. It’s about surviving the job. | 22 Jul 2025 | 00:42:37 | |
There are shoots where everything clicks. The light is magic. The client is chill. The work feels effortless. This episode isn’t about those. Instead, we’re going into the plumbing. Literally. From overflowing toilets in luxury villas to Fortune 500 invoice purgatory, from last-minute gear fails to moments that remind you why you ever picked up a camera in the first place — this one’s for every photographer (and creative) who’s quietly asked themselves: “Wait… is this really the job?”Turns out? It is. But maybe that’s not a bad thing. Because hidden under the chaos, the duct tape, and the missed payments… there’s still something worth fighting for. And sometimes, the most honest thing you can say is: “This is the job I hate the least.”And maybe that’s the most romantic thing you’ll ever say about your career. 🧰 Mentioned in this episode:
📬 Stay connected If this episode made you feel seen, stolen from, or slightly less alone— subscribe to The Terrible Newsletter: You’ll get Field Notes, updates, and the occasional nudge to keep going. 🙏 Support the show If you’re enjoying the podcast, please rate and review it on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps more misfit creatives find their way here. And honestly, it just feels good to know someone’s listening. Credits Music in this episode is licensed through Epidemic Sound and Artlist.io. | |||
| The Wrong Target - When Freelance Invoices Go Unpaid, and Rage Takes the Mic | 29 Jul 2025 | 00:41:05 | |
One phone call. One late invoice. One moment of controlled but very real rage. In this episode, I unpack a recent client conflict that left me feeling powerful, anxious, vindicated—and deeply uncomfortable. It’s not about being right. It’s about what happens when your nervous system hijacks your ethics, and you end up blowing up the wrong bridge. Social psychologist Jamie Hughes joins to help me understand what the hell happened inside my brain—and how anger, justice, trauma, dopamine, and freelance stress all get tangled up when money’s tight and respect feels scarce. It’s about accountability. It’s about empathy. It’s about not turning into the thing you’re fighting. “You can’t cuss out the situation. So sometimes, we just need someone to unload our stress on.” — Jamie HughesListen if you’ve ever:
Featuring:
Special Guest: Jamie Hughes Social Psychologist, Trauma Specialist, and Certified Life Coach 🔗 Website + Resources: beacons.ai/managing_mental_health 📩 Got a story? If you’ve ever burned a bridge and still think about it in the shower five years later, I’d love to hear it. Not to fix it. Not to absolve you. Just to witness it. 👉 Email: patrick@terriblephotographer.com 💬 Help Me Be Terrible, Together: If this episode hit you, leave a review on Apple Podcasts. I’ll probably read it on air in the most awkward, self-deprecating way possible. Music Licensed via Epidemic Sound and Artlist.io | |||
| Permission to Suck - Turning Failure Into Data | 05 Aug 2025 | 00:46:57 | |
Every photographer needs permission to suck. And I mean that literally. In this episode, I explore the difference between accidental failure and strategic failure, and why that difference will determine whether you spend your career playing it safe or actually growing into the photographer you're meant to become. From my own lighting disaster at a corporate shoot to Jerry Seinfeld's brutal honesty about audience judgment, we dive into how the greatest creatives use failure as a laboratory for growth. Learn why test shoots are your creative lifeline, how Roger Deakins broke convention to create cinematic magic in Skyfall, and why Ira Glass's famous "gap" between taste and ability is actually a feature, not a bug.
Schedule a test shoot this month. Not someday when you have more time or better gear, in the next 30 days. Pick one specific thing you want to explore:
Write it down. Put it on your calendar. Treat it like the professional development it actually is. Give yourself permission to suck spectacularly—because bombing in private is how you learn to shine in public.
Leave a Voicemail: Share your own creative failures, test shoot discoveries, or questions about strategic experimentation at terriblephotographer.com/voicemail Get Field Notes Newsletter: Weekly insights on creativity, identity, and finding your voice as a photographer. Sign up at terriblephotographer.com
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| The Dangerous Creative - How Solving Problems Makes You Dangerous (Even If You're a Barista) | 12 Aug 2025 | 00:56:40 | |
Sometimes creativity has fuck-all to do with your job title. In this episode, Patrick explores why the most dangerous creative minds often don't call themselves artists—they're teachers buying classroom supplies with grocery money, middle managers translating executive gibberish into human language, and baristas solving problems that million-dollar consultants couldn't crack with PowerPoint. Through the story of surgeon Atul Gawande's surgical checklist revolution, we examine how creative problem-solving becomes subversive when it works too well, threatening systems that profit from keeping things broken. What You'll Learn:
Featured Story: The tale of how a Harvard-trained surgeon nearly got blacklisted for suggesting doctors use a checklist—and how his "radical" idea of making sure surgical teams knew each other's names reduced complications by 35%. This episode speaks directly to photographers, CEOs, therapists, teachers, stay-at-home moms, baristas, and anyone else solving problems that others ignore. Atul Gawande TED Talk excerpt: "How do we heal medicine?" Links:
Music: Licensed through Blue Dot Sessions "Creative work that actually changes things doesn't feel like art. It feels like resistance." Episode Photo by Alexander Krivitskiy - Follow his work on Instagram | |||
| We Work, Rome Burns - How to Keep Creating When Everything Feels Like It's Falling Apart | 19 Aug 2025 | 00:42:56 | |
Community & Feedback Take the Listener Survey: What kind of episodes do you want more of? Your feedback directly shapes future content. 🔗 Complete the survey here Share Your Story: Have you experienced professional compartmentalization? The cognitive whiplash between personal crisis and work demands? Share your story—email or leave us a voicemail
Featuring insights from trauma researcher Bessel van der Kolk on collective trauma, plus permission-giving wisdom about maintaining joy and connection during uncertain times—not despite what's happening, but because of it.
Key Takeaways "That's the rhythm now. That whiplash. The emotional split screen. It's been the soundtrack of the last few years." "You have permission to laugh at dinner with friends while democracy feels fragile. You have permission to celebrate your small wins while staying aware of larger struggles." "Every time you choose connection over isolation, joy over despair, presence over paralysis—you're saying no to the forces that profit from keeping people scared, disconnected, and unable to think clearly."
Researchers & Thinkers Mentioned:
Audio Sources:
For Creative Professionals This episode applies whether you're:
The pattern is universal: How do you show up fully for the work in front of you while carrying awareness of everything else happening?
The Terrible Photographer Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and everywhere podcasts are found. Subscribe for honest conversations about creativity, identity, and finding your voice. | |||
| In the Shadows- A creative deep dive into photography, shadow work, Carl Jung, and the emotional weight of what we avoid. | 26 Aug 2025 | 00:48:28 | |
A podcaster recently told me this show was "really dark." So today, we're leaning into that darkness—because that seemed way more fun. This episode is about shadow work. Not the Instagram version. The real version. The kind that happens when you realize the thing limiting your creative work isn't technical skill—it's the parts of yourself you've been hiding from. Through David Bowie's near-destruction during his Thin White Duke era and his eventual disappearance to Berlin, we explore what it actually looks like to confront the buried parts of creative identity. Plus the story of a wedding photographer who missed the most important moment of the day—not because she wasn't skilled enough, but because she wasn't emotionally ready. This isn't comfortable. It's not content-ready. But it might be exactly what your creative work needs to become whole.
The Australian Podcaster's Question - What happens when someone calls your work "really dark" Bowie's Shadow Period - Los Angeles, 1975. Red peppers, milk, mountains of cocaine, and the creation of an "emotionless Aryan superman" The Berlin Disappearance - How the world's biggest rock star chose to vanish and why that wasn't the failure—it was the beginning Jung's Shadow Theory - The psychological framework that explains why we hide parts of ourselves (and how it shows up in creative work) The Wedding Photographer's Dilemma - When professional distance becomes emotional cowardice The Five Creative Shadow Territories - Where every creative person hides parts of themselves:
Personal Excavation - Why I hate shooting events (and what teenage depression has to do with adult creative limitations) The Integration Process - Shadow dialogue, creative audits, and the difference between working around wounds versus working with them
Carl Jung - Swiss psychoanalyst who developed shadow theory David Bowie - Particularly his Thin White Duke period (1975-1976) and Berlin years Carlos Alomar - Bowie's guitarist who observed his creative process during the shadow period
Share your shadow work discoveries using #TerribleShadows Don't share the polished answers—share the parts of you you're just beginning to reclaim.
"Heroes" by David Bowie (approximately 1 minute used) Additional music licensed through Blue Dot Sessions If This Episode Hit You…
Follow the podcast 📬 Subscribe to Field Notes (The Terrible Newsletter) 📷 Instagram: @terriblephotographer
This episode deals with themes of depression, anxiety, and psychological shadow work. It's designed to be therapeutic rather than triggering, but please listen with care for your own mental health needs. If you're doing this work and it brings up difficult emotions, consider speaking with a mental health professional who can provide proper support. Stay haunted. Stay human. And yeah... stay terrible. | |||
| Is It Good? - Photography, Approval, and the Fight for Creative Truth | 02 Sep 2025 | 00:39:12 | |
Every kid asks their art teacher, “Is it good?”—and most of us never stop. In this episode, Patrick sits in Lucy’s middle-school art room and realizes he’s still chasing the same answer on high-stakes sets: watching client faces, parsing murmurs behind a monitor, riding the narcotic of approval. We get into the modern authorities—clients, algorithms, mood boards—and the way we internalize them until we’re grading ourselves before anyone else can. We talk Gordon Parks, who lived the tension between immaculate Vogue spreads (noble, beautiful, necessary) and dangerous truth-telling (American Gothic, segregation, Malcolm X). We bring in Tolstoy’s blunt metric for art—sincerity that transmits feeling—and then admit the hypocrisy of needing authority to say “ignore authority.” Finally, we bring it home with practical footholds for working photographers and every other creative human: how to hold the tension between survival and legacy, how to make room for truth without burning down your life, and what it looks like to start small, local, and personal—today. Chapter markers (suggested)
Key takeaways
Practical prompts (do one this week)
Pull quotes
References & shout-outs
New listener compass New here? This isn’t “business hacks to win in 2025.” We go deep on the real life of making honest work while paying bills—sometimes deadly serious, sometimes ridiculous. Photographers, designers, teachers, parents—if you’re trying to lead a meaningful life, solve interesting problems, and make beautiful things, you’re in the right place. Try: Ep. 5 Still Here (hopeful), Ep. 19 The Job I Hate the Least (funny), Ep. 17 The Technician (identity & reinvention). Credits
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| The Tyranny of Okay - Why Most Creative Work Is Just Work | 23 Sep 2025 | 00:43:24 | |
What if the most radical thing you can say about your creative work is: it’s okay? In this episode, Patrick dives into the beige middle of creative life — the 80% of days that aren’t fireworks or disasters. He tears into LinkedIn’s toxic lobster-and-champagne highlight reel, confesses his late-night burger-level Photoshop grinds, and introduces us to Sarah, a catering coordinator who redefined what “ordinary work” can mean. Along the way you’ll hear:
This isn’t an episode about settling. It’s about survival, dignity, and gratitude for the work that keeps us human. The tyranny was never that work is ordinary. The tyranny was believing ordinary wasn’t enough. 👉 Listen if: you’ve ever felt guilty for not loving every second of your “dream job,” or you’re tired of pretending passion is renewable. 👉 Stay for: a story that will make you grateful for the burger on your plate. Resources & Mentions
Connect with Patrick Credits
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| Permission to Quit - AI, burnout, and why photographers are leaving the industry | 16 Sep 2025 | 00:45:12 | |
A New York–based commercial portrait photographer (big clients, covers, immaculate work) asked to talk. What came out wasn’t a portfolio review—it was a confession: he hasn’t made anything for himself in over a year, and he’s exhausted from performing passion he doesn’t feel. This episode is a permission slip for the photographers—and all creative workers—secretly pricing escape routes at 2 a.m. We talk about the unsaid epidemic of burnout, the grief under AI “efficiency,” and three practical permissions to help you stop performing and start feeling again. If you need someone to say it: you’re allowed to quit the version of creativity that’s killing you. What you’ll hear
Chapter guide
The Light Leak (listener assignment) For the next 7 days, make one thing a day that no one sees but you. No posting, no portfolio, no feedback. Just curiosity. If you want to break the rules publicly, tag #StayTerrible—but the real win is remembering what it feels like to make without an audience. Pull quotes
Resources & references
Music & audio credit
Episode Photography by Filip Mroz | Unsplash Who this episode is for Commercial photographers, portrait shooters, freelancers, art directors, and any creative who’s tired of performing passion while running on empty—and needs permission to step off the treadmill without abandoning their voice. Stay connected If this hit a nerve, share it with one photographer who needs the permission too. Newsletter & Field Notes: terriblephotographer.com IG: @terriblephotographer • @patrickfore Business inquiries & notes: patrick@patrickfore.com | |||
| Pub Meditations - Six Meditations, One Pint: Notes on Survival, Shadows, and Light | 09 Sep 2025 | 00:35:54 | |
One meditation. One burning question. One reminder you’re not alone. Every Wednesday in your inbox — shorter, sharper, and more honest than I could ever be in a long essay. Subscribe to Pub Notes: terriblephotographer.com Some days the world is too loud, too endless. You don’t need another lecture. You need a pint, a hard truth, and a line you can actually carry into tomorrow. This week’s episode is an experiment I’m calling Pub Meditations — three acts, two meditations per act. Six in total. Each one pulled from the episodes that hit hardest this year, reimagined as something shorter, sharper, and closer to the way the Stoics wrote: notes to survive the day. In the cold open, I borrow the first couple minutes from Ryan Holiday’s The Daily Stoic — a podcast I can’t recommend enough. Ryan’s voice is where I first realized Stoicism wasn’t about flatlining your emotions, it was about surviving chaos with your humanity intact. Go listen, subscribe, and keep a notebook handy. What’s inside this episode:
Line you carry: Survival. Shadows. Light. Beauty. The tools haven’t changed in two thousand years — keep it short, keep it sharp, keep it honest. Credits
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| The Curator's Disease - The Cost of Turning Your Life Into Content | 02 Dec 2025 | 00:47:16 | |
Belle Gibson faked cancer. The Stauffers rehomed their adopted son when the content became too difficult. Ruby Franke is currently sitting in a prison cell. It’s easy to look at the monsters of the influencer economy and think, "I am nothing like them." But if you peel back the layers of how we document our own lives, the difference might be smaller than we’d like to admit. In this episode, we dig into the "Curator's Disease"—the urge to professionalize our own existence. We look at how commercial production techniques have trickled down from ad agencies to our Saturday mornings, how we reverse-engineer our lives to fit a "Lululemon" aesthetic, and the exhausted reality of treating your family like supporting cast members. We discuss the difference between capturing a beautiful moment and interrupting a life to manufacture one. It’s time to get out of the Director’s Chair. In this episode:
Connect with The Terrible Photographer:
Credits:
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| Noise in the Shadows - When the Enemy is Competence | 25 Nov 2025 | 00:29:56 | |
June 6, 1944. Robert Capa is wading through the freezing water of Omaha Beach. He captures the most important images of the 20th century, and technically, they are a disaster. They are blurry. They are grainy. They are imperfect. And that is exactly why they matter. In this episode, Patrick explores the physics of light, the "hostage negotiation" of the exposure triangle, and why we are so terrified of grain. We look at how the market has colonized our vision, leading us to trade atmosphere for information and "safe" images for honest ones. Most importantly, Patrick confesses to "art directing" his own daughter's childhood—prioritizing perfect light over real memories—and asks if it's possible to trade competence back for presence. In this episode, we talk about:
Support the Show: If you enjoy these ramblings, or if this episode made you feel slightly less guilty about your grainy photos, consider fueling the next one. You can buy me a coffee (or let's be honest, a beer) to help keep the mics on and the existential spirals coming.
Links & Resources:
Credits:
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| The Sacred Mundane - Beating Hustle Culture, Escape Procrastination, and Focus Deeply | 30 Sep 2025 | 00:47:57 | |
Have you ever had a day where you told yourself you were “busy”… but couldn’t actually remember what you did? I know I have. Hours lost to scrolling, inboxes, half-finished tasks — and somehow at the end of it, I’m exhausted but nothing’s really done. In this episode of The Terrible Photographer Podcast, I go after the two liars in my head who keep me trapped in that fake middle ground:
Neither one delivers real work. Neither one delivers real rest. And both are lying to us. Instead, I want to talk about presence — the kind my Border Collie, Loki, embodies every time he drops into that crouch and locks onto a tennis ball like it owes him money. Which leads to… ⏱️ The Light Leak (36:40): The Loki Method — a simple, one-task-at-a-time rebellion against hustle culture and procrastination. Full attention, sacred focus, and real rest are scheduled like it actually matters. This episode is about rediscovering focus, dignity in the ordinary, and finding a way to work present instead of just working harder. If you’ve ever felt stuck between fake productivity and fake rest, this one’s for you. Music provided by Blue Dot Sessions | |||
| Basics, Deconstructed - Good vs. Bad - If It Feels Safe, It's Dead | 20 Nov 2025 | 00:28:50 | |
In 1863, the Paris Salon rejected Édouard Manet's The Luncheon on the Grass for being too messy, too flat, too "unfinished." Today, it's one of the most important paintings in art history. Meanwhile, the "perfect" paintings that won the medals? Nobody remembers them. In this episode, we're deconstructing the biggest question photographers face: What makes a photo "good"? How do we measure it? Who decides? And why do we keep building portfolios that are technically perfect but emotionally dead? This is the first episode in a new mid-week series called "Basics, Deconstructed" we take the elementary concepts of photography and tear them down until we find the bone. In This Episode:
Key Quote: "I don't hire photographers to be commercial. I hire technicians to be sharp. I hire photographers to make me feel something." Contact & Support: 📧 Email: patrick@terriblephotographer.com 🎵 Music: epidemicsound.com ☕ Support the show: https://www.terriblephotographer.com/support 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/terriblephotographer 📬 Newsletter (Pub Notes): https://the-terrible-photographer.kit.com/223fe471fb | |||
| Still Terrible - A Confession About Fear, Failure, and the Middle of the Story | 18 Nov 2025 | 00:56:12 | |
In this episode, I talk about the question that has been following me around like a stray dog with abandonment issues: “What am I doing wrong?” A late-night Zoom call. A missed phone call that might have cost me a job. Fabric mocking me at 2 AM. Postponing Christmas. Pretending patience is a virtue when really it’s just a financial liability. This one is not a framework or a lesson. It is a confession. A pressure valve. A look at the part of the creative journey nobody posts about because it is messy and embarrassing and makes you question whether you even belong in the room. We get into:
If you have ever wondered whether you are behind, off-track, or quietly failing your way through your creative life, this episode is for you. Music Provided by: https://www.epidemicsound.com Support the Show If the podcast means something to you, or if it helps you feel a little less alone in this creative circus, you can support the show here: https://www.terriblephotographer.com/support Your support keeps the lights on, the episodes coming, and the midnight fabric-styling breakdowns to a minimum. Thank you for being part of this. | |||
| Bloody Knuckles - Let’s talk about A.I. | 10 Nov 2025 | 00:48:19 | |
This is the episode I’ve been avoiding. Not because I don’t have an opinion about AI — but because I have too many feelings about it. Gratitude. Fear. Anger. Wonder. All tangled together. AI has become my external brain — a tool that helps me function, organize, even parent. And at the same time, it’s the thing that might end my career. In this episode, I talk honestly about what Adobe’s new AI tools mean for photographers, artists, and the humans behind the craft. About the moment when “photo editing” turns into “people editing.” And about what we lose when images no longer require someone to be there — to see, to choose, to feel. Because when everything becomes generated, the rarest thing left might just be the real. This isn’t a tech breakdown. It’s a gut check. In This Episode:
Featured Voices: A few members of The Terrible Community share how AI makes them feel — not what they think about it. “AI is lazy… it’s not intelligent, it’s just reflecting us — all our bias, all our noise — and pretending it’s something new.”Light Leak: Go make something where the practice is the point. Shoot something you’ll never post. Feel the weight of the camera in your hand — that’s what real still feels like. Because that’s the thing they can’t generate. That’s the thing they can’t take from you. Listen If You’ve Ever Thought:
Credits: Written & Narrated by: Patrick Fore Produced by: The Terrible Photographer Community Voicemails: Members of The Terrible List Music & Sound Design: Blue Dot Sessions Connect:
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| Economic Dumpster Fire - Why the Creative Economy Split in Half (and How to Navigate It) | 04 Nov 2025 | 01:05:13 | |
Episode 34 | November 2025 I was in my garage last Tuesday, shooting beef tallow. Yes, beef tallow—jarred cow fat with a marketing department. And while I'm adjusting highlights on solidified animal fat for the fourth time, I'm thinking: I used to shoot for Rolling Stone. What happened? Then my friend Candice texted. An illustrator in St. Louis. I asked how business was going. "Everything is a garbage fire out there." And that's when I realized: we're both drowning. But for completely opposite reasons. She doesn't have enough work. I have plenty of work—just the wrong work. And neither of us could shake the feeling that something bigger was happening. So I dug into the data. Economic reports, central bank surveys, and consumer debt studies. And what I found explains why so many freelancers feel like they're either sprinting or sinking right now. The economy didn't just slow down. It split in half.
The Three-Restaurant Economy
The Economic Data (Made Human)
What to Actually Do Tomorrow
Why Craft Still Matters
Timestamps: 00:00 - Cold Open: Beef Tallow in My Garage
Resources Mentioned: Economic Data Sources:
Strategic Frameworks:
What's Next: If this episode resonated with you, text a fellow creative and ask them: "How are you? Really?" Because the loneliest part of this moment isn't the struggle—it's the belief that you're the only one struggling. And if you want to talk more about navigating the bifurcated creative economy, hit me up on Instagram @patrickfore or email me at patrick@terriblephotographer.com The garbage fire is real. But so are we.
This is a show for creative humans navigating the messy reality of making work that matters while also paying rent. We talk about identity, craft, failure, and the absurdity of the creative industry—with radical honesty and zero bullshit. If you're tired of toxic positivity and gear reviews, you're in the right place. More Episodes: http://terriblephotographer.com
Hosted, Written, and Produced by: Patrick Fore Support the show: If this episode helped you, the best thing you can do is share it with another creative who needs to hear it. Word of mouth keeps this show alive. | |||
| Yeah, Maybe - Why Some People Kill Your Ideas (And How to Protect Them) | 28 Oct 2025 | 00:54:45 | |
Have you ever shared something you were excited about only to have it met with "yeah, maybe" or "how are you going to monetize that?" In this episode, I sit down with a story that's been eating at me for weeks — a conversation at a coffee shop that revealed something uncomfortable about regret, haunted creatives, and the ghosts of unmade work. This isn't about toxic positivity or hustle culture. It's about understanding the difference between someone who's tired and someone who's haunted. Between love and regret. Between the people who will protect your ideas and the ones who will kill them — often without realizing it. And if I'm honest, it's about recognizing when we become those people ourselves.
The Coffee Shop Moment A conversation with a photographer friend that starts with excitement and ends with something closer to mourning. The Difference Between Tired and Haunted Why some people poke holes in your ideas — and it has nothing to do with you. Three Faces of Haunting
The Idea Graveyard My own confession: the photo essay about my hometown that will never exist, and what it taught me about shelf life. Love vs. Regret How my wife Jaimi saved me from launching a business I didn't actually want — and how to tell the difference between questions that protect you and questions that undermine you. The Physics of Regret How other people's ghosts create friction that converts your creative momentum into heat, defensiveness, and eventual paralysis. Protecting Your Butterflies Practical strategies for guarding your ideas and building a "Go" list instead of a "Know" list.
"He wasn't trying to kill my idea. He was mourning his own." "When your idea gets that big, that expensive, that unreachable — it becomes a shield. The dream has become the cage." "Ideas have a shelf life. They start fresh, urgent, necessary. Leave them too long, they spoil." "Haunted people ask questions to protect themselves. People who love you ask questions to protect you." "Friction converts kinetic energy into heat. Your momentum gets converted into defensiveness. Your creative energy burns off as anxiety." "The only thing worse than starting something and failing... is not starting something at all." — Seth Godin "You can't hitch your momentum to parked cars."
Make two lists: List One: The Haunted People who respond to your excitement with skepticism, apathy, or "yeah, maybe." They don't get access to your butterflies. List Two: The Builders The ones who finish, ship, say "fuck yes," and offer help instead of obstacles. These are your people. Stop pitching to List One. Guard your butterflies. Feed them only to people who still believe they're real. Concepts Explored:
Quote: "The only thing worse than starting something and failing... is not starting something at all." — Seth Godin
Website: patrickfore.com Instagram: @patrickfore Podcast: The Terrible Photographer Book: Lessons From a Terrible Photographer (coming soon)
Host & Producer: Patrick Fore Episode Photography: Amy Humphries Find Amy on Instagram: @amyjoyhumphries Music Licensed Through:
Support The Show If this episode resonated with you, here's how you can help:
A Note From Patrick This episode has been living in my head for weeks. The coffee shop conversation happened months ago, but it took me this long to understand what it was really about. I hope this gives you permission to protect your ideas. To say "fuck yes" to butterflies when they land on your shoulder. And to stop asking permission from people who stopped saying yes a long time ago. Thanks for being here. Until next Tuesday — stay curious, stay courageous, and yeah, stay terrible. — Patrick The Terrible Photographer is a podcast for creative humans navigating the messy reality of making work that matters. We don't do hustle culture. We don't do toxic positivity. We do honest conversations about creativity, identity, and finding your voice. | |||
| Gold Star - Why Artists Keep Chasing Validation and How to Find Meaning Without the Awards | 21 Oct 2025 | 00:55:48 | |
You ever buy a twenty-two-dollar airport sandwich and convinced yourself it was worth it? That’s what this week’s episode is about — except the sandwich is a photography competition. In Gold Star, Patrick unpacks his love-hate relationship with the American Photographic Artists’ Untitled competition — and what it reveals about the creative world’s obsession with approval. From spreadsheets of judges to award-show absurdities like the Oscars and Grammys, this episode digs into why artists still crave validation from systems they don’t even believe in. It’s funny, frustrated, and a little too honest — a meditation on why we keep chasing the gold stars that will never love us back. Featuring a clip from Jim Carrey’s Golden Globes speech, a story about Patrick’s first Houston Addy Award, and a Light Leak that challenges you to make something that doesn’t need anyone’s permission to exist. You’ll hear about:
Mentioned in this episode:
Light Leak: The Paradox of the Work What if you stopped making work for judges, algorithms, and invisible audiences — and started making the thing that’s too honest to explain? | |||
| The Cage - Three Invisible Prisons That Keep Creatives Small | 14 Oct 2025 | 01:09:32 | |
Why creatives stay stuck, even when the door’s wide open. We all want freedom. Creative freedom, emotional freedom, professional freedom. But here’s the thing nobody tells you: You can be free… and still live like you’re caged. In this episode, I break down the three invisible cages every creative person ends up pacing:
It starts with a pacing lioness in San Diego, makes a detour through childhood Masonic mystery, and ends in a gallery in LA with a man named Jesse and a story I still can’t shake. If you’ve ever felt trapped by your own success, your style, your niche, or your silence… this one’s for you. Light Leak Assignment: Choose your cage. Take one honest step outside it. Before the week ends. No excuses. Listen if you’ve ever said:
Support the Show: This show is 100% listener-supported, which means I’m not selling presets, funnel hacks, or “ten ways to make six figures with your camera.” But if the episode made you feel something — if it helped you name the cage — I’d love your support. 👉 terriblephotographer.com/support Three amazing humans have already joined. Be the fourth. Let’s get weird and honest together. Episode Topics:
🔗 Other Mentions:
Stay curious. Stay courageous. And yeah… stay terrible. | |||
| Dirty Little Secrets - 8 Secrets Photographers Never Admit | 07 Oct 2025 | 01:10:53 | |
A milestone. And maybe the most uncomfortable episode I've made so far. A few weeks ago, I sent an email to thirty photographers I know. I asked them one question: What's your dirty little secret? The thing you'd never admit publicly. The thought that lives in the back of your brain at 3 AM. I told them it would be anonymous. I just wanted the truth. And I got a lot of responses. This episode is about those secrets. The ones we carry alone. The ones that make us feel like frauds, or failures, or like we've made a massive mistake. Some of these might be mine. I'm not telling you which ones. But they're all real. And if you've thought any of them, you're not alone.
Mentioned in This Episode Leslie's Podcast: Niche to Meet You
This show costs money to make—hosting fees, software, time. If you're getting value from it and want to help keep it going, you can support the show here: terriblephotographer.com/support The show's free. It's staying free. But if you want to chip in, I appreciate it.
📸 Instagram: @terriblephotographer
Music:
Hosted, Written, and Produced by: Patrick Fore
Write down one secret. One thing you've never said out loud. Not for Instagram. Not for anyone else. Just for you. Take it out of the dark and look at it in the light. You don't have to solve it. You just have to stop pretending it's not there. If this episode resonated with you, share it with another creative who needs to hear it. And if you want to support the show, leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps more than you know. | |||
| The Long Middle - Part 1 - The Island - Why Mastery Is Lonely | 09 Dec 2025 | 00:34:23 | |
In January 2007, Joshua Bell—one of the world's best violinists—played a $3.5 million Stradivarius in a Washington D.C. subway station. Over 1,000 people walked past. Only 7 stopped to listen. He made $32. If you've ever felt like you're playing your heart out while everyone walks past... this episode is for you. This is Part 1 of a 4-part series called "The Long Middle"—about that specific season in a creative life where you've mastered the skills, built the business, done everything "right"... but something still feels off. Today's episode is about the loneliness that comes with expertise. The isolation that happens when you get really good at something and realize fewer and fewer people can see what you're actually doing. You're not broken. You're not ungrateful. You're not alone. You're just operating at a level where most people can't witness the craft.
The Joshua Bell Experiment Sarah's Email The Loneliness of Mastery Three Types of Loneliness
The Taylor Guitars Story Gratitude as a Weapon The Research Witnessed vs. Consumed Rivers vs. Pools
WHAT'S NEXT This is Part 1 of a 4-part series called "The Long Middle." Over the next three weeks, we'll explore:
If you're Joshua Bell in the subway right now—if you're doing your best work and feeling completely invisible—email me. Tell me about the work nobody sees.
Lessons From A Terrible Photographer is now available as a Limited Collector's Box ($69.99). Includes:
Standard hardback coming January 2026. Get yours: terriblephotographer.com
Email: podcast@terriblephotographer.com Website: terriblephotographer.com Instagram: @terriblephotographer
Music in this episode from Epidemic Sound and Blue Dot Sessions. Episode photography provided by Benjamin Behre / Unsplash Written, Recorded, Produced & Edited by me, Patrick Fore.
Episode: 40
#CreativeLoneliness #PhotographyPodcast #CreativeEntrepreneur #MasteryAndIsolation #CreativeCommunity #TheTerriblePhotographer #JoshuaBell #WitnessedNotConsumed #ExpertiseIsolation #CommercialPhotography #CreativeLife #LongMiddle #ThePool
If this episode resonated with you, the best way to support the show is to:
This show exists because you listen. Thank you for being here. © 2025 The Terrible Photographer Podcast. All rights reserved. | |||
| Heresies - The Corpse - How Instagram Trained Photographers to Be Perfect, Then Called It Boring | 10 Feb 2026 | 00:55:01 | |
I posted a question on Threads: "Where are you posting your images these days?" The answers were scattered. Glass. Grainery. Pixelfed. Substack. Flickr, somehow. Very few said Instagram. There is no home anymore. Instagram was built by photographers, for photographers. Square format mimicking film. Filters mimicking darkroom techniques. A grid layout that functioned as a digital portfolio. For a while, it worked. Photographers got discovered. Built followings. Landed clients. Built careers. Then Instagram decided it wasn't a photo-sharing app anymore. They killed the chronological feed. Launched Reels. Made still images functionally invisible. And on December 31st, 2025, Adam Mosseri—Instagram's head—posted an essay saying that professional photography is "cheap to produce and boring to consume." That camera companies are "betting on the wrong aesthetic." That savvy creators need to make "explicitly unproduced and unflattering" images to prove they're human. We spent a decade mastering the Instagram aesthetic—sharp, well-lit, technically perfect. And Instagram just told us that aesthetic is wrong. This episode is about what Instagram took from photographers. Not just reach or engagement, but livelihoods. Wedding photographers, family shooters, local portrait specialists—thousands of professionals built their entire client pipelines on Instagram. And Instagram was always a time bomb. Tomorrow was never promised. But when tomorrow was working, it was easy to forget that. This is the third heresy in the series. We've talked about camera companies that profit from inadequacy, and gear influencers who monetize it. This one's about the platform that promised to connect us—and ended up destroying the very thing it was built for.
The Origin Story The Shift Was It Ever Good? The Mosseri Revelation The Economic Trap The Scattering The Bellingham Confession What We Lost (And Should Be Glad to Lose) The Autopsy The Mirror The Ending
"We edited our souls in real-time to match the preferences of a faceless audience we couldn't see and didn't know." "You weren't shooting for your portfolio. You were shooting to pay rent to the platform." "Tomorrow was never promised. But when tomorrow was working, it was easy to forget that." "Instagram didn't kill photography by pivoting to video. Instagram was killing photography the whole time. We just didn't notice because we were too busy getting likes." "If Instagram disappeared tomorrow, would you still be a photographer? Not 'would you have a way to show your work' but 'would you still MAKE work?'" "That's not a portfolio. That's a content treadmill. That's sharecropping." "Instagram turned photography into a commodity of 1.2 seconds." "If your only reason to shoot was Instagram, you were building on quicksand." "They can't leave. Because leaving means clients stop finding them. But they can't stay on the old terms either. Because the old terms don't work anymore." "The platform is dying. Maybe that means photography can live again."
Adam Mosseri - "Authenticity after abundance" (Threads, December 31, 2025) Key quotes from Mosseri's post:
Alternative Platforms Mentioned: | |||
| Heresies - The Oracle - Why Photography Influencers Are Modern Televangelists | 03 Feb 2026 | 01:06:59 | |
It's 3 AM. You're scrolling through infomercials. A televangelist is selling "Miracle Spring Water" for $50—promising financial breakthroughs, healing, transformation. All you have to do is send money and believe. Fast forward to 2026. A YouTube thumbnail: "This CAMERA changed EVERYTHING 📷🔥" Description: "Amazon affiliate links below." Same hustle. Different spring water. In this bonus heresy, we examine why gear influencers are the modern-day televangelists of photography—how they've built an entire industry around keeping you perpetually inadequate, how they've changed what we value when we look at photographs, and why most of them can't actually shoot. This isn't about hating content creators. It's about understanding the incentive structures that teach us to worship what we lack instead of what we hold. And it's about recognizing our own complicity in building this machine. Warning: This episode names names and makes uncomfortable arguments. If you've ever upgraded your camera when you didn't need to, this one's going to hit close to home. IN THIS EPISODE The Peter Popoff Parallel The Gospel of the Spec Sheet The Liturgy of Inadequacy "Almost" Is the Most Profitable Emotion The Confession The Influencer-as-Career Problem The Mirror Moment Redefining "Good" The TikTok Critique The Scott Kelby / Jeremy Cowart Story What Actually Gets Lost The Portfolio Problem (The nuclear option) What Doesn't Matter (And What Does) The Ending KEY QUOTES "Almost is the most profitable emotion in the world. Because almost lets us feel like photographers without the risk of making photography." "Your satisfaction is their bankruptcy." "The camera didn't change. Your faith did. You were taught to worship what you lack instead of what you hold." "Transformation is not a transaction. It's something you build." "We've given authority to people who know how to measure corner sharpness but can't make an interesting photograph." "Certainty is the enemy of vision. Because vision lives in the uncertainty." "The thing I'm looking for isn't in the next camera. It's in the next thousand frames. And you can't buy those. You have to make them."
Peter Popoff Inside Edition Investigation (2015) James Randi Exposure Peter McKinnon Scott Kelby / Jeremy Cowart Photo Walk Ofcom (UK Broadcasting Regulator)
(For the "what to study instead" section)
AUDIO CLIPS USED Peter Popoff "Miracle Spring Water" Infomercial (2018) Inside Edition Confrontation (2015)
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| The Long Middle - Part 2 - The Costume - Why We Hide Behind Professional Roles | 16 Dec 2025 | 00:35:37 | |
Why do photographers wear so much black? Why do we feel confident on stage but panic at networking events? And why is it so hard to find real community in the creative industry? In Part 2 of "The Long Middle" series, Patrick explores the costumes we wear—not just the black clothes and gear, but the professional roles and personas that keep us safe and isolated at the same time. From 17th-century Japanese Kabuki theater to APA mixers in San Diego, this episode examines why we choose invisibility, what happens when we need established roles to feel legitimate, and the five-second decision that keeps us from connection. IN THIS EPISODE:
THE CHALLENGE: The next time someone asks "How's it going?"—tell them one true thing. Not "busy." Not "crushing it." One honest thing. Drop the shield for ten seconds. LINKS: Website: terriblephotographer.com The Newsletter: Sign up for Pub Notes – Musings, updates, and things I probably shouldn't say in public. Support the Show: Help keep the lights on Email Patrick: patrick@terriblephotographer.com CREDITS: Music licensed through Epidemic Sound and Blue Dot Sessions. Episode Artwork Photo by @erwimadethis Written and Produced by Patrick Fore NEXT WEEK: Part 3 – "The Enemy" | |||
| Heresies - The Cult Member - Why Your Camera Brand Doesn't Care If You're a Good Photographer | 27 Jan 2026 | 00:47:58 | |
Rochester, 1888. George Eastman releases the Kodak camera with a brilliant slogan: "You press the button, we do the rest." Serious photographers immediately panic, calling new users "Button-Pressers" and "Kodak Fiends." One writer declares photography dead: "When everyone is a photographer, then no one is an artist." Same fear. Same argument. Different century. This is Episode 2 of Heresies—where we say the things the photography industry would prefer you not think too hard about. Today: Why your camera brand doesn't care if you're a good photographer. Why brand ambassadors are unpaid marketing departments. And what happens when you mistake ownership for mastery. We'll talk about the spreadsheet behind "partnerships." The ROAS calculations that determine who gets loaned gear. And why musicians like Benny Blanco make billion-stream hits on outdated Macs with wired keyboards while photographers argue about megapixels in forums. This isn't another "gear doesn't matter" sermon. Gear absolutely matters—but only if you already know what you're doing. The R5 makes you more capable, not better. And there's a difference. If you've ever felt like you needed the "right" camera to be taken seriously, this one's for you.
Quotable Moments "When everyone is a photographer, then no one is an artist." — 1890s photography critic "Ownership feels like mastery. That if you just have the right tool, the hard parts quietly disappear." "I wanted the gate to exist. I wanted the years to mean something visible. I wanted effort to leave a mark you could recognize on sight." "You're not a partner. You're a line item. An asset on a balance sheet. A tactic in a marketing plan." "The R5 doesn't make me a better photographer. It makes me a more capable photographer—but only if I already know what I'm doing." "The tool enables. But it doesn't create. Vision creates. Mastery creates. And you can't buy either of those." "Musicians fetishize sound. Photographers fetishize newness." "Pride is expensive. You can put pride in your work. Or you can put pride in your kit. One costs time. The other costs money." "If the most interesting thing about your work is what you shot it on, you didn't make work. You made a purchase."
Benny Blanco - Mix with the Masters Historical Context:
Musicians Referenced:
Gear Theory:
Links & Resources The Terrible Photographer Lessons From A Terrible Photographer (The Book) Support the Show (Buy Me a Coffee) Subscribe to Pub Notes (The Newsletter) Patrick Fore
Have a question? A story? Hate mail?
Podcast written, produced, and hosted by Patrick Fore Recorded from my garage in San Diego, California Stay curious. Stay courageous. Stay terrible. | |||
| Basics, Deconstructed - Editing is Violence - How to Choose What Matters When Everything Looks Good | 22 Jan 2026 | 00:24:51 | |
Most photographers drown in the edit. Not because they can't see what's good. Because they can't choose what matters. This episode is about the violence of editing—the courage it takes to kill good images, the ego that dies in the process, and why great portfolios are built on rhythm, not range. I tell the story of a La Jolla shoot where I took 1,900 frames in two hours and couldn't figure out which ones to keep. About losing my sense of up and down. About the underwater feeling of staring at 300 good images and having no idea which one cuts through. And about what happened when I finally admitted I was too close to see. This isn't about workflow. It's about authorship. Topics:
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE Walter Murch – Film editor (Apocalypse Now, The English Patient, The Conversation) LINKS & RESOURCES Website: http://terriblephotographer.com Lessons From A Terrible Photographer (The Book): https://www.terriblephotographer.com/the-book Support the show, buy me a coffee: https://www.terriblephotographer.com/support Subscribe to Pub Notes (The Newsletter): https://the-terrible-photographer.kit.com/223fe471fb Terrible Photographer on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/terriblephotographer/ Patrick Fore on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/patrickfore/ CREDITS Podcast written, produced, and hosted by Patrick Fore Music licensed through Epidemic Sound & Blue Dot Sessions Recorded from my garage in San Diego, California CONTACT Questions? Thoughts? Hate mail? Stay curious. | |||
| Heresies - The Proxy - Why Listening to Your Clients Might Be A Bad Idea | 20 Jan 2026 | 00:49:08 | |
When a client says "I want exactly this," are they hiring you to execute their vision—or are they asking you to solve a problem they can't articulate? This is the first episode in a five-part series called Heresies—where we say the uncomfortable things the industry doesn't want you to think too hard about. In this episode: Why listening to your client might be killing your work. Why taste is a technical skill, not a preference. And the difference between being a problem-solver and being an expensive tripod. We'll talk about threading the needle between "authentic" and "amateur." About knowing when you're hired as an artist versus a technician. And about the clients who want you to recreate their blurry iPhone photos of tennis racquets at impossible angles. (Yes, that's a real story. No, I don't want to talk about it.) This isn't about ignoring your clients. It's about knowing when to translate what they're asking for into what they actually need.
Quotable Moments "You're not an equipment rental with legs." "Clients don't hire us to give them what they want. They hire us to give them something beautiful. Something effective." "If you don't have a vision, you can't translate someone else's vision." "You're not a photographer. You're just someone with a camera, waiting for instructions." "The cost of saying yes to the wrong client isn't just time and money. It's the slow, quiet erosion of why you started doing this in the first place."
Links & Resources The Terrible Photographer Lessons From A Terrible Photographer (The Book) Support the Show (Buy Me a Coffee) Subscribe to Pub Notes (The Newsletter) Patrick Fore
Have a question? A story? Hate mail?
Podcast written, produced, and hosted by Patrick Fore Stay curious. Stay courageous. Stay terrible. | |||
| Amature - Why I Envy Photographers Who Don't Get Paid | 13 Jan 2026 | 00:40:45 | |
There's a woman in Bangkok who's been selling noodles from the same corner for 43 years. She turned down Bon Appétit. Not because she's shy. Because she didn't want to cook for strangers with expectations. This episode started with a voicemail from Jason, a listener in North Carolina who shoots photos of his kids and has no interest in going pro. He called me out for ignoring non-professionals. And he was right. What I didn't expect was how much his email would make me confront something I've been avoiding: I'm envious of amateur photographers. Not because they're bad at what they do. Because they still have the thing I traded away. This is about the cost of professionalization. About the difference between making work because you have to versus making work because the work demands to be made. About freedom, money, and what happens when you refuse to let the transaction define the craft. If you've ever felt like you're not a "real" photographer because you don't charge... this one's for you. And if you're a pro who's forgotten why you started... this one's for you too. Key Themes:
Episode Timestamps: 0:00 - Cold Open: The Noodle Queen of Bangkok Mentioned in This Episode:
Key Quote: "You are not beneath professionals. You are adjacent to freedom they lost." For Jason: Thank you for the email. Thank you for the voicemail. Thank you for calling me out. This episode wouldn't exist without you. LINKS & RESOURCES: The Terrible Photographer: Lessons From A Terrible Photographer (The Book): Support The Show: Connect: CREDITS: Podcast written, produced, and hosted by Patrick Fore A NOTE FOR NON-PROFESSIONALS (Amatures): If you're listening to this and you don't charge for your work—if you shoot because you love it, not because you're building a business—please know this: Your work matters. You're not less than. You're not waiting to become real. You're already real. And some of us wish we still had what you have. SHARE THIS EPISODE: Know someone who needs to hear this? A parent with a camera. A hobbyist who doubts themselves. A pro who's forgotten why they started. Send them this episode. Let them know they're not alone. | |||
| The Fresh Start Fallacy - Are You Building a Boat or Just Floating in a Tube? | 06 Jan 2026 | 00:41:04 | |
EPISODE DESCRIPTION: Three hundred years. That's how long my family has been in America. Jamestown. Virginia. Colonial laborers. Post-Civil War homesteaders in Missouri. And not one of them—not one—ever owned anything that lasted. In 1726, when a British clerk wrote "Fore" instead of "Fauer," my family's name changed. But the pattern didn't. This episode isn't about New Year's resolutions or fresh starts. It's about lazy rivers, tubes, and boats. It's about realizing you're floating in a system you never chose—and that everyone in your family has been floating for centuries. It's about being the first one to try to get out, even when you don't know how to swim. I talk about my MIT PhD brother who doesn't know how to freelance. A wedding photographer who realized he became his father. And why I'm angry at ancestors I've never met for never trying to break a pattern I now have to fight. If you've ever felt like you're working hard but never building anything. Like you're trapped between staying comfortable and risking everything. Like you're the first person in your family trying to do something different with no map and no model—this one's for you. Not because I have answers. Because I'm in the middle of the same fight. IN THIS EPISODE:
WANT A SEAT AT THE TABLE? The Table is a small, email-based conversation space for creative people in the long middle. No apps. No feeds. No pressure. No posting requirements. Just occasional emails about the real stuff—and the option to reply, or not. Some weeks you'll get a reflection. Some weeks a question. Some weeks nothing. Sometimes it's about creative existential dread. Sometimes it's about whether gaffer tape smells different depending on the brand. It's a pub table. But everyone's wearing sweatpants. And nobody has to drive home. If you want a seat, email: patrick@terriblephotographer.com
Website: http://terriblephotographer.com The Newsletter: Sign up for Pub Notes – Musings, updates, and things I probably shouldn't say in public. Support the Show: Help keep the lights on Email the Host: patrick@terriblephotographer.com | |||
| The Long Middle - The Third Space - How to Actually Build Community When Traditional Third Spaces Are Dead (And Why We Have to Try Anyway) | 30 Dec 2025 | 00:38:42 | |
You've mastered the craft. You've built the business. You're successful. But you're still lonely. You're Joshua Bell in the subway—playing a Stradivarius while everyone walks past. You've taken off the costume, rejected the hierarchy, and you're still isolated. So now what? In the finale of "The Long Middle" series, Patrick explores sociologist Ray Oldenburg's concept of "The Third Space"—the pubs, coffee shops, and barbershops where community used to happen naturally. He examines why these spaces disappeared, how COVID delivered the final blow, and why digital spaces (Reddit, Discord) might be Third Space for some people while remaining incomplete for others. This episode is both diagnosis and prescription: why we're lonely, why it's gotten worse, and the uncomfortable truth that you can't find community—you have to build it. One vulnerable conversation at a time. IN THIS EPISODE:
THE CHALLENGE: Reach out to ONE person this week. Not to network, not to collaborate. Just: "I've been thinking about creative loneliness lately. Want to grab coffee?" Then show up without your costume and talk about what you're actually struggling with. KEY QUOTES: "Third Space doesn't exist until someone creates it. And it doesn't start with a community. It starts with one person." "Digital-only Third Space is incomplete. You need to look someone in the eye. You need to sit across a table from another human. You need to exist in a room where you can't edit yourself before you speak." "You can't outsource belonging. You can't scroll your way to community. You can't consume your way to connection." "COVID didn't pause Third Space culture. It killed it. And we're still living in the wreckage." WANT A SEAT AT THE TABLE? The Table is a small, email-based conversation space for creative people in the long middle. No apps. No feeds. No pressure. No posting requirements. Just occasional emails about the real stuff—and the option to reply, or not. Some weeks you'll get a reflection. Some weeks a question. Some weeks nothing. Sometimes it's about creative existential dread. Sometimes it's about whether gaffer tape smells different depending on the brand. It's a pub table. But everyone's wearing sweatpants. And nobody has to drive home. If you want a seat, email: patrick@terriblephotographer.com LINKS: Website: terriblephotographer.com The Newsletter: Sign up for Pub Notes – Musings, updates, and things I probably shouldn't say in public. Support the Show: Help keep the lights on Email the Host: patrick@terriblephotographer.com
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