Explore every episode of the podcast The Plural of Sheep is Sheep

In episode 18, we talk to our special guest Sam Turcotte: student, Bee Meadow Farm volunteer, and aspiring vet! You'll hear about talking muffins, avoiding burnout as a vet, why Russ hates Boston Cream doughnuts, dubious sweet potatoes, and more! Big thanks to Sam for joining us and being the voice of sanity for episode 18. Oh yeah, and a big shout-out to the fine people at Woodlands Campground!

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"It’s like grandparents kissing - it’s fine!"

“Most people you only have to tell once. And the ones you don’t, you kill.”

"That’s why we don’t get sponsorships - Nat’s always uttering death threats"

“You know I’m a boomer because I forget what we were just talking about “

“I voluntarily came here to do this thing and now they’re talking about birthday-cake Oreos and assisted suicide”

"Fuck you to all the other vets, I’m her favourite. Suck it."

"That was a wild fucking ride, I gotta say!"

Welcome to episode 17, in which we are supposed to discuss hibernation, torpor, brumation, viking funerals, Russ' kinship with a bean-bag chair, insulting lemur names, the turtle that ran away, and SO MUCH MORE!

Listen to us mispronouce "brumation" as "brumination" for the entire episode!

"I'm all for Viking funerals!!" "If I were at your funeral, I would 100% shoot a flaming arrow into your raft!" "If I were to go to your funeral, I would hire a 20-year-old stripper to throw himself onto your casket... then dip."

"It's like I'm a beanbag chair hitting the floor"

"If you get dementia, I wanna visit you every day in the home for your sick-ass rap content!"

"I can't think of anything that rhymes with Russ."

"Can I put my cats on sleep mode... for just, like, a week?"

"They use the word arousal a lot, but it was in terms of them rising..."

"...from their treehole?"

"I'll tell you what's wrong with you: F*CKING NOTHING!"

On the visit from Russ's parents: "Did they bring chocolate?" "They brought something better.. a pew from a church! It's Snuffy's favourite seat now... until I drive some more farts into it."

"What the f*ck were we talking about?"

In this episode, Russ and Nat discuss waggle and other animal dances, groupies with flowers and wine, action figures, working in pajamas, and more. They also muse about why they aren't famous yet, and who their sponsor would be if they were.

“That’s just my metric! Someone mass-produced several million 11” versions of me… yeah, that’s cool!”

“It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times!”

“My *sshole grew another *shole that cringed…”’

"We be smirching that name all up and down these halls!"

Additional words of Russ-Nat wisdom:

"If you wanna be upset, be upset.  I fyou wanna be happy, be happy. None of this (life) makes any sense. We are carbon-based people on a blue rock spinning through space.”

“If you wanna hang upside down from a hoop, hang  upside down form a hoop!” Just don't fall and paralyze yourself.

Tune in to our special Christmas episode where ee discuss  nose ebola, Russ's stint as a Christmas cow-jockey, polydactyl calves (baby cows, not leg parts), a cat named Debbie, and so much more! GIVE IT A LISTEN! And we also try to answer a couple of listener questions. How do YOU get ready for Christmas?

PLUS: What would Russ's life have been like if his cat Snuffy had been named Debbie, seemingly unbothered by three Bassett Hounds?

"Debbie, shut that trap! I'm not giving you any more treats!"

"Kevin, you are what the French call 'Les incompetents'"

"I pack underwear like I'm going to have diarrhea eight to nine times a day!" - Russ

"Can't sh*t pants if no wear pants" - Russ's brother,(also the title of his future memoir)

In this episode, Russ and Nat discuss all things spooky with our special guest Grace O'Hara, who has volunteered and worked at Bee Meadow Farm for many years, and has a ban on ouija boards in her family.

Tune in for chocolate vs. dogs, creepy banshees, freaks of nature, rat cannibalism, two-headed bovines, Russ's lush and mobile eyebrows, Hallowe'en zebras, and a moving poetry recitation.

"We as a society only value something after it's gone, or when it's plastinated."

"Give me all your peanuts!"

"Mmmm, delicious rat flesh!"

And how do you pronounce "scone" anyway?!

In perhaps our most unhinged episode yet, we find out about Natalie's grade-school trauma and why 13 is her lucky number, then we discuss off-brand pets! For example, what pet would you end up with if you crossed our meat-lovin' former barn-cat Missy with demon-spawn mini-horse Katie? You'll have to listen to find out.

And don't miss our discussion of the true value of Natalie's eggs (chicken and otherwise), not to mention our foray into poop... is poo different if it's your child's? And by the way, Russ knows sh*t about chickens.

"Am I fantasizing this?"

"When it's yours, it's different!"

"Man. No chicken ever takes a better x-ray than my boy!"

If you like this episode, don't forget to share it with everyone you know! We won't rest until we are famous, or at least infamous.

In episode 12, Natalie and Russ discuss weird and wonderful animal hook-ups: bunny and goat, dog and pig, and even a foray into the tale of a boy in Kyrgyzstan raised by sheep!

We learn something new in every episode, and so will you, whether you want to or not.

"I promised myself I wasn't going to do this but... the OXPECKER."

"Let's talk about kids raised by animals” “THAT’S ME!”

"Carlos was in sexual overdrive." "Do you think that's why Squiggly is such a d**k now?"

PS: Natalie would like to apologize for her excessive snorting.

In episode 11, Russ and Natalie discuss some of the weird hybrids in the animal world! Hear about geeps and zonkeys and the elusive Beaver Bernard! Plus, the weirdest things we have ever cried about! Tune in now.

"This would be so illegal if humans did it."

"Imagine your Dad's wool sock that has been worn a million times, hanging over a table with a bowling ball in it..."

"Hencocks are our canary in the coal mine!"

What hybrid is Justin Bieber + Beethoven ... Biebhoven? JustBeet? Beetber?

"Dad, if you're listening, and I hope you're not..."

In episode 10, swearing has returned, and we discuss why there's no room for dad-bods in the pipefish community, Pigeon guillemot fathers and their horrific approach to parenting in times of scarcity, and dumping pets on our own dads. Pluls there's the bonus tale of the latest Bee-Meadow-Farm cat Pablo Escobar's escape attempts. and his possible name change to "El Chapo"

Digestion Digressions, Refrigerator’s Destiny, and Basement Pets, with a side of Negligible Senescence!

Welcome to our Mother's Day episode, in which we refrain from profanity in honour of Russ's Mom (but fail at least twice without even noticing!)

We talk about bad mothers, good mothers, vengeful house-sparrow baby-mamas, the regenerative skills of axolotls, ugly owls, and Russ's recent encounter with a sweet sassy singer, a baby lawyer, and a sexy scientist at the Windsor Tavern in Vankleek Hill. Also, Natalie's mother was a cuckoo, but also a sea turtle. And what DOES a baby lawyer sound like?

"Menopausal women don't cry, they rage!"

"How much of an axolotl would you need to remove to have two axolotls?"

"You're accountable to no one!"

"Had one of those evenings where you go out for one drink at 10,  and cut to it's 3 am and you're on your couch and you've just polished off that second steak, stinking of booze and are like 'What the hell just happened to me?'"

On episode 8, we chat with our wonderful guest Kristine Seguin of The Big House Sanctuary and Rehab for chonky kitties. We discuss so much, including weight loss for beautiful chonks, nutless-cat/blanket romances, the wonders of farm vets, and the secret Flamingo Club (for which Russ was all dressed and ready.) As always, swearing abounds! Cover your ears, my delicate flowers.

"A semi-feral cat could send any grown-ass man screaming!"

"I never made the Stanford Prison Experiment; I just learnt from it."

"All the fat cats get Brazilians. All of them."

Check out The BIg House and all the great work Kristine does with overweight cats in danger of being euthanized:

https://www.thebighousecats.com/

IG: https://www.instagram.com/thebighousesanctuary/

FB: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61555964357928

The Big House is a registered non-profit Cat Rescue that provides Sanctuary and Rehabilitation for the world's most overweight cats. We are dedicated to providing these cats with the resources to succeed, finding them loving homes, and educating the public about feline health and well-being.

In episode 7, we welcome to the show guest Sophie Malo of Playbow Animal Rehab Clinic in Lancaster, Ontario, and returning guest  Beccy Fourney (nurse practitioner to giraffe-a-man-a-dactyls in episode 5.) Today we are talking about absolutely everything from cannibal chickens to dart frogs to giant Dutch hands to "Why the hell would anyone ever want to start a rescue farm?" There's also a small discussion of an x-rated clown colouring book sent to us by an adoring fan.

Sophie Malo is a certified animal rehabilitation practitioner (she obatined her CCRP certificate from the University of Tennessee) and proud cat-mama to Gizmo, a lovely special-needs Tuxedo kitty.

Rebecca Fourney is a nurse practitioner in Cornwall, Ontario. When she's not helping humans lead healthier lives, she's leading tours at Bee Meadow Farm as our Director of Client Experience, a lofty title for a job that pays nothing.

We had a lawyer as a guest, which is why this episode is longer than "Avengers: Endgame"! Russ and Nat take on barrister-and-solicitor (that's Canadian for "lawyer") Gordon Scott Campbell. When he's not dealing with gasoline-soaked defendants or old ladies beating court guards with walkers, Gordon spends his time making tea for his wife Natalie, and working at his side gig as Chief Litter-box Scooper at Bee Meadow Farm. Learn about the law, fictitious x-rated clown magazines, and Gordon's new nickname!

In episode 5 of the The Plural of Sheep is Sheep, we talk animal healthcare vs. human healthcare with our very special guest, nurse practitioner (and Bee Meadow Farm Director of Client Experience!) Rebecca Fourney. YASSS BECCY!

If you've ever wondered how to care for a minotaur, centaur, or giraffe-a-man-a-dactyl, this episode is for you!

And how do vets and nurse practitioners and rescue farm owners cope with sadness and trauma? DARK HUMOUR! This episode is full of it (and so much swearing, sorry-not-sorry!)

And what DO you do when you have  a giraffe-a-man-a-dactyl stuck in a barbed wire fence?

After featured guest Beccy called in sick, Russ and Nat sat down with zero plan, and talked about everything under the sun (but we'll see you in the next episode, Beccy!) We think it's out best episode ever, but we say that about every episode. And with new equipment, the audio quality is finally quasi-professional. Or at least, no longer sucks.

Snippets:

- "One of the biggest hiccups of podcastery is listening to your own voice."

- You'll learn to pronounce "scone"... or not! (You can say it two ways!)

- We chat about mentoring the next generation of ... whatever we are.

- Cats rule, dogs drool

- PS: Natalie would like to apologize to lawyers everywhere, especially the one to whom she is married.

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Disclaimer: This podcast is provided on an as-is and as-available basis. You agree that you listen to this podcast at your own risk, and you may not laugh at our jokes, and could possibly be offended by the repeated dropping of F-bombs. As well, we make no warranties or representations about the accuracy of Natalie's characterizations of lawyers, and we will assume no reliability or responsibility for any judicial sensibilities that are ruffled by this podcast. Furthermore it should be stated that, despite what was said IN JEST, Natalie unequivocally does NOT hate lawyers (especially not Gordon) but is actually just not very  impressed by the current incarnation of the Canadian legal system. 

As with any podcast, you should use your best judgment and exercise caution where appropriate to protect the lawyers you love!

In our third episode, after Natalie erases 14 minutes of the original recording and Russ is super kind about it all,  we reiterate our need for a sound engineer as we answer listener questions of every variety, including the classic "How much wood does a woodchuck really chuck?"

Also, next episode we're using a new @#%$!?*^$ microphone...  and as per usual, there is swearing in the episode.

Some gems from Episode three:

"That makes us sound like we're OnlyFans"

"Take three is going to be much better!"

"You have to feel the feelings."

Natalie: "I would like to be Russ, because (A) he's cool and knows all the esoteric facts..."

Russ: "But doesn't know what esoteric means..."

Join us for episode two of The Plural of Sheep is Sheep in which Russ and Natalie recall the top five veterinary cases here at Bee Meadow Farm. You'll hear about Ziploc bags full of sh*t, three-foot-long swabs shoved up horse noses, Missy the barn cat's desire for horse-meat sandwiches (don't worry, no horses were eaten!), why cats always vomit on carpets, and our need for a sound engineer who will work for free.

Just a few quotes to entice you:

"This is rapidly becoming the unhinged whirlwind of discussion that Episode One was"

"If we don't have a million listeners by the end of August, I'll be sad."

"Scriptless is the way to go!"

"...this beautiful snapshot of where the parasites live."

"Lie back and think of England."

"Streptococcus equi subspecies equi!"

Welcome to the debut podcast of "The Plural of Sheep is Sheep," wherein Dr. Russ Campbell and Natalie Rowe introduce themselves (and Natalie shifts her microphone and sounds like she is talking into a toilet paper roll for most of the show.) Russ is a large-animal veterinarian who lovingly cares for the critters at Bee Meadow Farm, located near Apple Hill, Ontario.  He grew up with cows in PEI but now lives in Glengarry county, where Natalie is hell-bent on turning him into a horse vet (cuz cow vets are a dime a dozen!) Russ has a gift for giving voice to the animals here, especially our cat Missy (who apparently is an 75-year-old Scotch-imbibing chain-smoking old biddy with a taste for horse.)  Natalie, the owner of Bee Meadow Farm, loves to write and  is a graphic artist with a music degree who spends copious amounts of time dealing with the bodily emissions of animals. The occasional f-bomb may be dropped, abscesses will be drained, and blind sheep may mow us down in the pasture, but we are all about education, love of  animals, and fun. Especially fun! Follow us and you'll learn about the ins and outs of life on a farm full of rescue animals, with an emphasis on the veterinarian's perspective. And there will be guests! Lots and lots of guests!