The Nocturnists – Details, episodes & analysis

Our Uncertainty in Medicine series launches next week, and to set the stage, we're sharing one of our favorite episodes from the archives - a heartfelt conversation with New York Times columnist Ross Douthat about his journey through the healthcare system while living with chronic Lyme disease.

Medicine likes certainty - diseases we can see and test for and treat. But what do we do when we can't see? When we can't help? Do we keep searching? Or do we look away?

In this episode, Emily speaks with New York Times columnist Ross Douthat about his book The Deep Places, which tells the harrowing story of his experience with Lyme disease, and what it's like to navigate a chronic illness that mainstream medicine hasn't yet fully explained.

Find show notes, transcript, and more at thenocturnists.org.

The Nocturnists is made possible by the California Medical Association and donations from listeners like you.

Medicine is full of uncertainty—from ambiguous diagnoses to unpredictable outcomes and the complex emotions of not knowing. Uncertainty in Medicine is a new documentary podcast series, created in collaboration with Alexa Miller of ArtsPractica, that examines how both healthcare workers and patients navigate the unknown. Through powerful personal stories and in-depth conversations with professionals whose work depends on making decisions amid uncertainty, the series explores what it means to embrace the gray areas of medicine—and life. The first episode of Uncertainty in Medicine drops Thursday, April 3.

Find show notes, transcripts, and more at thenocturnists.org

The Uncertainty in Medicine series is supported by the ABIM Foundation, by the Josiah Macy Jr. Foundation, and the Gordon & Betty Moore Foundation.

The Nocturnists is supported by The California Medical Association and donations from listeners like you.

Series Host & Co-Creator: Emily Silverman, MD

Series Correspondent: Alexa Miller (ArtsPractica)

Playwright and memoirist Sarah Ruhl discusses her book Smile, which chronicles her journey with Bell's Palsy and the emotional and spiritual challenges of chronic illness. She reflects on the idea of the "slow" or "partial" recovery, how her work as a playwright informs her perspective, the challenges of navigating the healthcare system, and the power of storytelling to heal both writer and reader.

Find show notes, transcript, and more at thenocturnists.org.

The Nocturnists is made possible by the California Medical Association and donations from listeners like you.

This episode of The Nocturnists is sponsored by the Bucksbaum-Siegler Institute for Clinical Excellence at The University of Chicago. The Institute is dedicated to fostering compassionate doctor-patient relationships and advancing clinical care. Each year, the Bucksbaum-Siegler Institute recognizes extraordinary healthcare professionals through The National Clinical Excellence Award. To learn more about the award, and to nominate a deserving clinician, visit bucksbauminstitute.uchicago.edu.

In this episode of Conversations, Dr. Jessi Gold, psychiatrist and Chief Wellness Officer at the University of Tennessee, discusses the mental health challenges faced by healthcare workers. Jessi shares insights from her new book, How Do You Feel? One Doctor's Search for Humanity in Medicine, and explores how burnout, moral injury, and wellness are shaping the future of medicine. The conversation delves into topics ranging from telemedicine's influence on mental health care to breaking down the stigma that prevents clinicians from seeking help.

Find show notes, transcript, and more at thenocturnists.org.

The Nocturnists is made possible by the California Medical Association and donations from listeners like you.

In this episode of Conversations, Ruth Madievsky, clinical pharmacist and author of the national bestseller "All-Night Pharmacy," shares the inspiration behind her darkly poetic novel about sisterhood, addiction, and intergenerational trauma. Ruth reflects on how her Moldovan roots, her healthcare career, and her love of poetry have shaped her writing. We also dive into the mysticism that permeates her work and explore how trauma and healing intersect in her life and fiction.

Find show notes, transcript, and more at thenocturnists.org.

The Nocturnists is made possible by the California Medical Association and donations from listeners like you.

In this episode of Conversations, Dr. Gita Pensa opens up about her harrowing experience as a defendant in a 12-year-long malpractice lawsuit and how it spurred her to create Doctors and Litigation: The L Word, a podcast aimed at helping physicians cope with the emotional toll of litigation. Gita also discusses her involvement in the documentary "A World of Hurt: How Medical Malpractice Fails Everyone," which exposes the flaws in the malpractice system. Through her personal story, Gita highlights practical and psychological tools for doctors navigating the legal system while dealing with fear, shame, and burnout.

Find show notes, transcript, and more at thenocturnists.org.

The Nocturnists is made possible by the California Medical Association and donations from listeners like you.

In this episode of Conversations, we sit down with Dr. Sara Walker, an astrobiologist and theoretical physicist who is reshaping the way we think about life. From her work on the origins of life to her innovative assembly theory, Sara takes us on a journey through the possibilities of discovering alien life and challenges some of the core tenets of biology and physics. This conversation will make you rethink not just how life began, but what life is and does.

Find show notes, transcript, and more at thenocturnists.org.

The Nocturnists is made possible by the California Medical Association and donations from listeners like you.

Family medicine physician Zed Zha persuades her reluctant parents, visiting from China, to indulge in the treat of ice cream.

Zed performed this story live at the Leonard Nimoy Thalia Theatre at Symphony Space in New York in November 2023, for an event on the theme of "Taking Care" which The Nocturnists co-produced with the Bellevue Literary Review.

Find show notes, transcript and more at thenocturnists.org.

Mother of four, writer, and attorney Ann Schrooten reflects on a pivotal moment from her fifteen year journey caring for her son Jack, who lived with congenital muscular dystrophy.

Ann performed this story live at the Leonard Nimoy Thalia Theatre at Symphony Space in New York in November 2023, for an event on the theme of "Taking Care" which The Nocturnists co-produced with the Bellevue Literary Review.

Find show notes, transcript and more at thenocturnists.org.

The Nocturnists is made possible by the California Medical Association.

Shaida Dusenge Kamali, originally from Kigali, Rwanda, reflects on her journey from earning a prestigious scholarship to study in Oklahoma, to raising her younger brother after the sudden passing of their mother. Now a second-year medical student with a passion for geriatrics, Shaida shares the challenges and growth that came with balancing education, caregiving, and cultural transitions.

Shaida performed this story live at the Leonard Nimoy Thalia Theatre at Symphony Space in New York in November 2023, for an event on the theme of "Taking Care" which The Nocturnists co-produced with the Bellevue Literary Review.

Find show notes, transcript and more at thenocturnists.org.

The Nocturnists is made possible by the California Medical Association.