The Neurodivergent Professor – Details, episodes & analysis

I want to let y’all know what is going on in my life.

There will be a pause in my articles, podcast, and videos until at least August. For the next two weeks or so I will be delivering our boat from the BVI to the USA. 

Wait, WTaF?

For those who don’t know, my family has been planning to live on a boat since before the pandemic. We are finally to the point of making the shift. We are selling our home and getting rid of most of our stuff. We are buying a boat and will move a very small amount of our stuff onto the boat. We will be living on the boat in Chesapeake Bay, USA until December when we will head to the Bahamas. 

It reminds me of this George Carlin skit:

Leaving the Rat Race

I’ve talked and written a lot about this shift, but mostly we want to try something new. We hope to shed some of the pressures of American Life and redefine our values. 

I’m terrified by all of it and think this is a great opportunity for growth. I also realize we may be in over our heads. But that’s life, isn’t it?

We may come crying back with our tails between our legs. Who knows? We’ll see. Good thing, bad thing, who knows. Reminds me of this Buddhist koan:

Are These Bad Times or Good Times? The Story of the Zen Farmer
When we stop trying to coerce life to go exactly the way we want, we naturally experience a greater sense of fluidity…mindfulness.com

I look forward to sharing my experiences and discovering how this will change my writing, podcasting, and video. I’ll be back as soon as I can.

In the meantime, please enjoy some of my older content and let me know how it holds up!

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Have you ever sat down and thought about your values? 

Values are important, motivating, and provide guidance.

I’ve done a lot of values work in therapy and find it challenging. I value many things, but prioritizing the top five to ten is difficult and dynamic.

One thing I have learned during over a decade of values work is that many human values suck. 

I think a lot about universal or ‘optimum’ values

Are there ‘optimum’ human values? For my purposes, optimum is an adjective meaning most favorable or desirable. The best. In biological systems, we can think of optimum in terms of homeostasis or balance. Please see here for more on that. 

An example of optimum is transportation. Can we identify an optimum mode of human transportation? Many suggest it is the bicycle: 

Science of Cycling: Human Power | Exploratorium
© The bicycle is a tremendously efficient means of transportation. In fact cycling is more efficient than any other…annex.exploratorium.edu

In the case of transportation, we skipped past ‘optimum’ in pursuit of ‘better’. Now we burn jet fuel to fly around the planet. This uses more fossil fuels and creates more problems associated with that industry. 

We also change our values

Change is inevitable. Everything is impermanent and evolves. Sometimes, we change toward improvement. Sometimes our pursuit of ‘better’ leads us astray. Words like improve, better, and success, are extremely subjective. 

Modernity induced a key shift away from optimum values and toward money, status, and power. Currently, artificial intelligence is exacerbating this transformation.

With each technological advancement, we need to revisit our values. We are mistaken to believe that each step along the evolutionary ladder is an improvement. Rather, organisms experience increases in efficiency that facilitate new abilities. But these advancements are not always the optima.

Consider, briefly, biological respiration. An amphibian requires minimal energetic investments to oxygenate cells across moist skin. Humans, on the other hand, must breathe. While humans can be more active and grow larger and more complex, are we ‘better’?

So with evolution, knowing what is optimum is key

Humans evolved the ability to choose, which itself becomes a selection pressure. We can influence our evolution. If we want to remain extant we need to make better choices.

Valuing money, status, and power leads to our demise. To enhance evolutionary fitness we must revisit our past. In our past, we may find more optimum values to guide our future.

I will be assisting with delivering my future floating home for the next few weeks but will post when I can. Please check out my back catalog here and on The Neurodivergent Professor podcast and YouTube channel. 

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“The problem with the world is that the intelligent people are full of doubts, while the stupid ones are full of confidence.”

― Charles Bukowski

Do you ever think about this? Can you think of an example from your life?

Sometimes, it seems we’re surrounded by idiots. 

And they’re loud.  We worship confidence, arrogance, and status. Why are we surprised when the greedy become gluttonous?

Why do we not honor traits like kindness, empathy, and connection? A lot of this is fear. We worry about what might happen if we interrupt, disagree, or speak our minds. 

The system is oppressive

 The system requires non-leaders to be complicit, to elect these leaders, and to value the characteristics that make them so bad at leading. These power differential relationships are not only common, but they also dominate. In one way, we are simply playing our role in the governance systems of human society. From another viewpoint, if we do not reject the undeservedly arrogant, we are complicit in their remaining in power. The good news is, that these authoritarians have no power if we can stop enabling.

Taking the bone away from the pit bull

It makes perfect sense that the oppressors are drunk with power. We expect our oppressors to oppress. This power is just too much. Like heroin or iPhones, it is impossible to resist once you’ve had a taste. Once a person who values power, status, and money gains access to these things, it becomes a runaway train. The first step is taking away their power. But how do we do that?

What are the alternatives?

Our current societies are governed by the wrong values. We admire those who seek and master power, status, and money.  It is time we choose a more cooperative and less competitive approach. There are too few winners under our current competition models. What is voting if not a competition? A solution I propose frequently is simply not to elect anyone who wants to be in government.  To change anything, we must first take the bone away from the pit bull. Power is addictive and no one who has it is going to give it up willingly. Unfortunately, the system makes it nearly impossible for us enablers to do anything about it because we have no power. It isn’t easy to leave an abusive relationship. It’s a trap.  But we must take the power away. Ending the enabling slays the dragon. 

Help ourselves, help each other

The first step is for those of us more fortunate to help ourselves. I preach about a practice that facilitates healing and includes journaling, therapy, meditation, mindfulness, and healthy living. These journeys are unique to each of us and, in my opinion, our responsibility. The next step is for those more able to help those less able. Some of us suffer less from oppression. The global north, for example, has gained all the benefits of using fossil fuels. This leg up can be used to help leverage smaller countries to build the necessary infrastructure to be able to care about things like government. Those of us not in abusive relationships can connect with centers designed to help abused spouses leave unhealthy relationships. We can help adults learn to read.  We help ourselves, then we can help each other. This nurtures connectivity and cooperation. It forms the foundation of a bottom-up takeover and redistribution of power.

In my perfect world, all voices will be heard with equanimity. 

The one-dimensional, self-serving, obnoxious voices will be ignored by most rather than supported. We can get there by cooperating.

It’s the hardest thing we do because it is overthrowing the system designed to keep us complicit. 

This ain’t gonna be easy.

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Analog nomads . . . . . 

When I decided to focus on the Are vs Should Problem, or the struggle between the person you ARE and the person you feel like you SHOULD BE, I was thinking mostly about the SHOULD part. 

To me, the issue isn't so much about figuring out who we ARE, it's more about telling the SHOULDs to be quiet. And figuring out how to do that. 

The AREs are things we want to be, know we are, and find comfort in. The SHOULDs tend to be things we don't necessarily want to do or be, but feel (for varying reasons) that we are supposed to do or be. 

In the AVS interview series, I've talked to people across the spectrum of ARE to SHOULD. Most people talked about their struggles with the SHOULDs, even if they were/are currently living mostly in their ARE. I think most of us would rather be seen as living in our AREs, but few of us are doing it well. I think you will agree that Pat exemplifies what it looks like when you are minimally influenced by the status quo.

Pat Schulte is someone I thought might not have much to say at all about the SHOULD, because it seems to me he, and his family, live primarily in their ARE.

I knew about Pat, his wife Ali, and their two kids, through their blog called Bumfuzzle. I am interested in sailing, and as you may know my wife and I plan to move on to a sailboat at some point in the not-too-distant future. So I discovered Bumfuzzle as I searched for role models who had done similar, seemingly crazy, things.

And if you didn't catch the word 'blog', let me mention that there are no videos nor audio on Bumfuzzle. It is a blog in the most classic, analog sense. Pat writes posts about their adventures. They are accompanied by excellent digital images, but that's as far as it goes with respect to the YouTube, Instagram world we live in. Nearly all of the other adventurer web pages feature video nowadays.

But that doesn't detract from the Bumfuzzle story - it accentuates the coolness of it. The adventureness of it. The ARE of it.

In short, Pat and Ali left the rat race as we know it in their late 20s and have not stopped in twenty years. Whether boat, car, motorhome, or camper trailer they have lived a nomadic lifestyle. They seem to go where they please, however they choose, at whatever pace they happen to take. It's the most carefree thing I can think of.

Yet Pat holds a job, albeit one that allows him to work remotely, and they are not independently wealthy. They also have two kids along for the adventure. Their lives are far from easy, but they seem simple. They figured out what they wanted and made it happen.

Which is why I like using the term analog to describe them - and Pat didn't seem to mind this term. They are like analog nomads. . . . 

Before KEW, reading their blog made me feel like I was watching Star Wars. It seemed like such a fantasy. But they are DOING IT. The live it. And they don't seem to be any worse for the wear. In fact, and you can see this in the interview, Pat seems so . . . . normal. So peaceful and calm. So centered. So wise. 

Maybe the AREness of their lifestyle isn't correlated to that vibe. But I'm going to argue it is.

I find Bumfuzzle inspring. It is so important to have a mirror to reflect back to you the life you want. I hope the Schulte's adventures do this for you as they do for me. I hope you are inspired to live more in your ARE, and to make the sacrifices to do so knowing there is value there. 

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Quick show of hands. Who among us has ever been told they should journal?

Even though this is a 'should' statement, people who say 'you should journal' mean well.

I'll say it, and I mean well.

But I'll say it without using the word 'should'.

You will benefit from journaling. 

If that sounds like a money-back guarantee, it's the closest thing you can get for free.

But also remember, free advice is worth what you pay for it.

Except that journaling is on, like, 100% of all the 'to-do' lists.

Therapists. Coaches. Teachers. Parents. Counselors. 

They all know about journaling. It is a powerful tool. 

But what is it?

It's LITERALLY just writing out your thoughts. Either on paper or on a computer or typewriter. 

Hell, my podcast is arguably an exercise in journaling and there's no writing involved.

Journaling is facilitating a flow of thoughts from your brain/mind to some neutral zone.

This facilitation process is fairly easy, but it does several things.

It alters HOW the thoughts move. 

In your brain or mind the thoughts are in a known space and will behave as they do in that space.

Often this behavior is insane, monkey-like, and we refer to it as the 'monkey-mind'. It seems out of control and fear inducing.

Other times thought behavior is more concise and cohesive. "Man, I'm really craving an IPA tonight."

Mostly, your mind is a bunch of background noise you don't pay attention to.

When you journal, you ARE PAYING ATTENTION.

You are also directing the behavior of the thoughts to wrangle them on to the paper. 

These processes create and require AWARENESS of the thoughts and that you pay ATTENTION to how they form, how you form them on the page.

Those processes, in and of themselves, will induce great effects. 

But I can't really tell you WHAT or HOW. That's up to your system. It's all about how it UNFOLDS. It will be unique to you.

So. For the low-low price of free I'll give you a money-back guarantee that journaling will benefit you but I can't tell you how, or what, or even when.

I know. It's the deal of the century.

But that's how personal growth works, isn't it?

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Have you heard people say that you can't control what happens to you, but you CAN control how you react to what happens to you?

It's so true, but it isn't easy.

We all want some degree of control in our lives. Or wish for it. Long for it.

But control is an illusion. 

I'm not saying life is 100% chaotic and unpredictable, but being attached to controlling things really only wears you out.

I have learned that if I let go of (a little bit of) control my life is more comfortable. 

And increasing comfort (and calm, and peace) is my goal.

How, then, do we figure out how to live with less control?

One of the ways is simply called 'mindfulness'. And choosing a particular direction or frequency of your mind is called a 'mindset'. 

Choosing to be mindful in a particular mindset is how.

And, as you see on the internet, there are thousands of resources for being mindful or changing your mindset.

But what I have found is, you have to make a huge effort to direct your own path.

In other words, this is mostly a DIY project.

Yes, you need to learn what you want - and that's what we are doing now on KEW, applying the Are vs Should Problemand figuring out how to live more in our AREs and less in our SHOULDs.

So you really have to sit down and figure out what your values are, what your dreams are, what gets you out of bed in the morning, and what you WANT for your life.

But I'll tell you, being mindful - being aware, being able to direct your attention, being able to change your perspective from focusing solely on yourself to that of an observer and even other people - is key.

Mindfulness essentially means paying attention to your thoughts and checking them against your values.

Mindset, again, is a flavor of mindfulness. 

Growth mindsets choose to admit they don't know everything and are open to learning.

Abundance mindsets choose to believe the world has abundant resources for them.

A mindset of connectedness chooses to believe all people are connected and thus affect one another.

In other words, your mindset flavor is a choice. 

Do you choose to live a fulfilled life of joy and calm?

Or do you choose to focus on what you don't have?

What do you choose?

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Are you self aware?

We all think we are. Just like we all think we're right, as we learned from Paul Gadola in multiple interviews.

And, really, if you are taking the time to wonder whether or not you are self aware, you probably are.

Our awareness is one of our greatest strengths. It's a super power. Awareness is how we pay attention to the world around us. It is the currency we use to relate to the world and each other.

Awareness is the conduit through which we connect our individual selves or souls to the outside world or universe. 

We can learn to control awareness using our attention. If awareness is the noun, attention is the verb. We use our attention to set an INTENTION toward the universe. What do we want to spend our attention on?

If you're like me, you spend too much attention wasting your awareness on your d$%& smart phone. Or looking for the next distraction driven dopamine hit. But we're trying to do better.

The easiest and most effective way to train your attention is meditation. A lot has been said lately, and over the passed 3500 years, about meditation and it often gets overly complicated.

Meditation is simply how we train ourselves to pay attention. It is the practice of awareness.

I'll talk a bit about meditation in this Episode and how I came to practice. But don't worry, the next couple of Episodes will fall under the guise of Meditation, Mindfulness, and Mindset.

Many cogs of the same wheel. 

For anyone involved in, or curious about Meditation, Attention, Awareness, Mindset, and Mindfulness will benefit from this series of Episodes. I hope you will join me. 

I appreciate your comments, likes, follows, views, and subscribes. I hope we get a chance to interact.

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What DO you need? Have you ever really asked yourself this question?

And I don't mean what do you 'sort of what right now to pacify or distract you', I mean what do you REALLY need in your life that you don't have enough of?

I, and many of my guests, talk a lot about Values and knowing your 'Why', and knowing what you need is related to those ideas.

It amazes me how we THINK we know all this stuff about ourselves, but most of the time we are rushing to find some suitable answer rather than putting in the hard work of considering how we really FEEL.

And, sure, there's a bunch of folks out there - especially the macho men - who will laugh at the idea that we even have feelings. But if you're reading this you don't worry about what they think. 

Knowing how you feel is a critical step to self awareness. To knowing what you care about. To understanding your values. And to having filter or guidepost to help you prioritize your limited energies in you life.

As we navigate this thing called life, I find it is increasingly important to know what to prioritize or we end up wasting time. Too much time.

Many have said that time only goes by more quickly, and as I near 50 I can attest it is true. 

If you're thinking about how to get the most out of the time YOU have left, this Episode should help. As will the previous and future Episodes. Please consider following, commenting, and subscribing so I know you're listening.

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Have you ever met someone who seems to be doing exactly what they were meant to be doing? I have. And this week I'm sharing our conversation as part of the Are vs Should Problem discussion. 

Emmanuelle Chasse is a helper. Like many we've interviewed on KEW, she helps people through her writing, podcasting, and coaching. You can find out all about how she can help you here: https://rapidtransformation.ca. Reach out and she can help you make a rapid transformation.

It was great to get Emma's insight about being the people we Are and struggling with the people we feel like we Should be. There's too much shouldding in the world, and she has seen her fair share. In herself and her clients.

From sticking to diets to not beating yourself up to learning to understand you are meant to be who you are, Emma has dedicated her career to helping people. Using talk therapy techniques, hypnotherapy, and learning from professionals in their respective techniques, you will find solutions.

I hope you enjoy listening to what Emma has to say as much as I did. Below is a short snippet of wisdom if you need a taste.

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If you have not seen the Social Dilemma, it is a great little conspiracy theory. And one I can get behind. The gist is internet companies (facebook, youtube, etc.) have developed complex algorithms (models, simplifications) that monitor your online (and off, through your phone microphone, alexa, etc.) behavior. These companies then use this information to determine what advertisements you might click on, perpetuating the online economy.

If you think about this in capitalistic terms, it's genius. We've now gone far beyond mere psychological manipulation, popularized by the 'mad men' of the 50s through today, and can now trick you into letting them measure your actual behavior. Whereas before the estimates were 'pretty good', now they can be 'excellent'. 

In short, your attention has become a product thanks to sophisticated (not really) math.

So this episode is all about how we simplify the world. Sometimes this is a very good thing. We weed through the nonsense to focus on what is important - watch for a Prioritizing episode in the near future. But in the case of the YouTube algorithm, the advertisers are simplifying you into a robot that consumes. You, in short, become the proverbial cog in the capitalism wheel. You are, in the best case scenario, providing free data to the overall human model. And at the worst case, you are being manipulated into believing things you may not choose to believe under normal circumstances.

Of course, it's easy for me to believe this 'what could be a conspiracy theory' because I have a negative mindset toward advertising and marketing. While I understand the need to get in front of people's eyes to make them aware of your products or message (like my blog and podcast), I greatly dislike the use of manipulation, whether indirect (psychology) or direct (click measurements). 

But this Episode is really just about models. What they are and how they are used. Whether for good or evil.

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