Explore every episode of the podcast The Mean Time

This week on The Mean Time, Jared & Pat are asking the REAL questions... Like, whats more important - athleticism or strength? What does it take to land a tray flip? What genre does the song "Come On, Eileen" fall under? Who from N-SYNC had a better solo career? And most importantly, how many leaky burgers can Jared make in 25 minutes and what's the secret ingredient? All will be answered TODAY on THE MEAN TIME! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Yo, listen up, here's the story. About a big nosed freak that lives in a blue world!!!!!!! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

PAT IS BACK FROM TOUR!!!! Maybe next time Macklemore can tag along! We heard he just became available!!!!! We don't know yet though, just an idea.. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Chiara is back and has a lot on her mind including the surprise of the century, how to celebrate Labor Day the way a true American should and what her favorite Dragon Ball Z characters look like naked!!!!!!!!!! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Stick around for a massive surprise at the end of the episode and also we apologize for murdering Ikuyo. She didn't deserve it. AVAST YE MATEYS YA HAARRRGGGGGGG!!!!!!! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

3, 6, 9! THE MEAN TIME! WE GONNA SOCK IT TO YA ONE MORE TIME! Sorry. Another absolute banger I gotta tell you these boys are on a roll so you can bet your bottom dollar the next episode is gonna suck! (Alternate Title: Bees In The Gazebo) Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The boys went crazy on this one. We're talking Smart House, Steven Seagal, Amber Alerts, and Rigid Lines all before Rocking The Dragon for like 10 minutes with a special phone appearance from the Sweetest Baby of all time! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

WE GOT NICK BACK ON THE POD BABY!!! Talking DBZ, Sushi, Seth Rollins, and The Odyssey. Is Pat the dumbest person in the world or is Jared a genius? I'll give you a hint, one of them is typing this right now! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

SPIDER-MAN IS OUT AND THE BOYS HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY ABOUT IT! Spoilers are an understatement so please proceed with caution but also go watch this movie are you out of your mind? Shout out George Bush. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Soccer Moms is on the podcast and they are stealing the show! We're talking about blind horses, Italian folks, and how Sebastian Maniscalco gives Chicago a bad name! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The boys discuss Chris Nolan's The Odyssey and Jared has very reasonable responses to Patrick's super valid opinions on it. You know like a normal episode of The Mean Time. Also your high school bully shows up at the end. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The boys discuss James Bond, The Matrix, The Lord Of The Rings, and Randy Rhodes... no not that one. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Welcome to the Church of Jared Gaines of Latter-Day Saints! It is also a pyramid scheme and a cult, the details get fuzzy. Stick around, Patrick will most certainly be doing an oiled up/tarp down thing after general mass! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

WILL NEFF IS HERE AND HE IS WAY FUNNIER THAN US. This was a humbling 4th of July experience and if you see either one of us in an improv class after this just know that Will Neff shamed us there. What a wonderful guy and a wonderful time to be alive. USA! USA! USA! USA! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

THANK YOU FOR 2 YEARS OF THE MEAN TIME AND WELCOME TO THE CELEBRATION!!! The most jam packed, all killer no filler, wild and exciting episode yet BY FAR. The boys take turns bringing in crazy surprises that will shock you and possibly kill you!!! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

THE VIEWS EXPRESSED BY PATRICK AND JARED ABOUT JACKIE CHAN ARE ALL INCORRECT AND SHOULD NOT REFLECT ON THE MAN'S LEGACY OR MAYBE THEY SHOULD BUT REGARDLESS DON'T LISTEN TO US. Enjoy. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Jared gets Pat up to speed on the absolute SAGA that is Reckless Ben vs Bricks & Minifigs AND TELLS FUNNY JOKES LIKE HAHA FUNNY JOKES ABOUT BOMBS AND IT'S HAHA SO FUNNY JOKE TIME. Also the boys audition for a Dropout show. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

THE BEAST INSIDE IS CHAINED NO LONGER. Watch the boys become the fallen angels they were always meant to be or something. Comment your favorite lyric to prove your inner darkness is wild and untamed! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

WHAT A HACK!!! Jared finds a bunch of really super healthy and sustainable ways to lose weight and that makes Patrick scared and jealous of his lifestyle and physique. Patrick is very sorry for all the native people living on endoctored land and he will vote for whoever you think is best in the upcoming election to change that or keep it the same. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The boys celebrate their 100th episode with five puppies!!! And almost all of them lived so that's good! We do a little Q&A from our Patrons. Love ya'll, thank you for supporting the show! Check out Pawsitive Beginnings LA! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Carter Ace joins the boys and they discuss Rush Hour, Madea, and Michael Jackson while Pat gets a much needed shave! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Jared let's loose and that's a big mistake. Maybe Pat will ride off into the sunset on a Harley Davidson about it. Regardless the boys are talking Michael and Avengers Doomsday and what to do if a girl is bullying you in school. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The boys are trapped in the Adirondacks and the only way out is to uhhh... The boys take a trip to Boston where everyone says uhhh... The boys think that all the Juggalos should uhh... Well why don't you tune in and all will be revealed! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

WE APOLOGIZE FOR NOTHING AND WE SERVE NO MASTER. Che Durena is on The Mean Time and Jared and Patrick have been fully stunlocked. I'd like to tell you what was said in this episode but the whole thing feels like a salvia trip and I feel dumber having watched it. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

IT'S SO HAAAAARD TO SAY GOODBYEEEE TO BUTTERFREEEEEEE!!!! Welcome to Jared's newest hyper-fixation and Pat's newest nightmare! Watch the boys try to win over TBS to finally get that show they've been talking about! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

(Patreon Shoutout is at 14:45) Well it finally happened. Pat set a swift pace that Jared just couldn't match. Audio listeners I want you to genuinely describe what you think Pat looks like from context clues alone. May God have mercy on your souls. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Pat does his best cougar impression while Jared recovers from a trip to the emergency room and the recent death of Mark the producer! Tropic Thunder is the greatest movie ever filmed! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Stand Up Comedian Wyatt Feegrado AKA Jesus Christ of Nazareth has joined the podcast and shockingly brings up Pokemon before Pat gets a chance! Strap in for a wild ride while the boys talk about Catholicism, Osama Bin Laden, and the difference between LA homeless and San Diego homeless! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

GUESS WHO'S BACK BACK BACK, BACK AGAIN GAIN GAIN, JARED'S BACK BACK BACK, TELL A FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND!!! Everyone report to the podcast studio and witness Pat dressed up in a skimpy lil outfit for the second week in a row if you can believe it. You can tell Jared's back because he won't shut up about how we used to live in a society! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

I'M SEEING DOUBLE. Honey Revenge joins Patrick for the last day of Black History Month. LETS GO. Have fun! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Gabe and Luke from the podcast TRAPPED ON THE INTERNET join Patrick while Jared is gone! So much check out their show and socials! I'll see ya with another special guest next week! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Come with us on an adventure from ancient Egypt to Babylon all the way to Macedonia because Jared got it confused with Mesopotamia! We're talkin kinks! We're talkin 9/11! Tony has returned from the dead! WE'RE COMIN AT YA LIVE! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

"Belle Delphine sells her bath water one time and now I can't wear sandals!" STRAP IN MEANIES THE DOGS ARE OUT. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Expanding the Mangoose Cinematic Universe, Old Sauce and White Wolf enter the fray! Honestly this one is a bit front loaded A BIT TOP HEAVY you could say. Stick around until the end for a disgustingly sweet message from Jared to his wife! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

EARNING OUR PAYCHECKS WITH THIS ONE FOLKS. Hey, you kids remember 2003? I sure hope you do, otherwise none of this is going to make any friggin sense. SLOP IS OUT BY THE WAY AYOOOOOOOO Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Get ready for a RAD and EXTREME TIME here at The Mean Time! Jared goes full Chinese while Pat lurks on the playground and Jaws stomps a fat ollie from the CN Tower! SAIL! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The Mangoose Rises and the Slop is endless. This city reeks of sin, and somebody is stealing all of the Cobra Converters. Local law enforcement is dragging their feet, slumped over donuts and cold coffee while crime runs rampant. Meanwhile, a hot new song is taking over the city and infecting young minds everywhere. And I'm only one Mangoose. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Welcome back to another episussy of The Mean Tussy! Patrussy and Jarussy talk Avatussy, Matthew McConaughussy, and of course, The New Yussy! Sorry. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

HAPPY BOXING DAY FROM THE MEAN TIME TO YOU! This is easily our raunchiest episode yet so apologies to our parents and future children. Unfortunately this episode is so graphic that you'll have to watch with an adult present so go find one, apologize to them as well, and get ready for some uncomfortable glances! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Hey guys, Jared here. Converting to Buddhism is no laughing matter. I'd like to set the record straight by apologizing for my jokes about the Buddha and his teachings, my intention is to spread joy. I cannot, however, speak for Matthew Quran-aughey who seems to be taking advantage of a religion for personal gain. I will devote my time to the studies of the Tripitaka to make up for any offense I may have caused. Thank you and God bless America. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

PAT IS BACK! Warning: The stunts in this podcast were performed by professionals, so for your safety and the protection of those around you, do not attempt any of the stunts you're about to see. If you're reading this now, comment "We get it Pat, you tour." for an opportunity to hurt Pat's feelings and make yourself feel better. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

We set the record straight on Patrick's thoughts on women as well as Patrick's straightness... Jared and Pat are back together next week LET GO Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

THE MEAN TIME ON THE ROAD BABYYY! Patrick sits down with his new friends in Action/Adventure. Head on over to YouTube there's a lot of visuals in this one. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Aunty Koala and Father Time spend their final day together before she tragically boards a United Airlines flight to the land down under. Movie reviews, a terrible birthday experience at a fancy sushi place, and The Redneck Comedy Roundup was unfortunately not enough to get her to stay so we must bid her a doo. A DOO, KOALA! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

¡MI AMOR! Welcome to another episode of...how you say... ¡THE MEAN TIME! We are burning with the intense passion of an oven set to 500 degrees... ¡CELSIUS! Join us for an hour of love and desire while we unravel the mysteries of the heart and watch Chiara get absolutely wasted on video... ¡BIENVENIDOS! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

First of all, a big thank you to Bearpunch for hosting us at their beautiful studio, they made us look incredible. Second of all, IT'S KOALA TIME because Chiara is here as a full-fledged-honest-to-goodness-bonafide-chair-sitting-camera-focused-dialogue-having guest. And she has A LOT to say. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Jared gets so passionate that his microphone can't even handle the sheer charisma and malfunctions so hard that the whole entire episode sounds crispy crunchy! Happy Halloween, thanks to all of the Patrons who submitted their problems for the advice column, and welcome to the world, Kyler Brantleigh! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

A very special and interesting and fun episode is coming at you and you think it is very fun and special and interesting. In fact, it may be your favorite episode of this show to date. You will continue to watch this show until instructed otherwise. There is no war in Ba Sing Se. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.