It’s January 17, 2025, and if youuuuuu can believe it, it’s time for TGMEM to talk about their favorite movies of the year once again! It was a year of Longlegs, whole concerts that were traps, Lisan al Gaibs, and Octobosses, and your favorite drunken idiots are here to break down all the cinematic highs and lows of 2024. It’s Episode SIXTY NINE baby, so get cozy, crack open a beer (because we know you already failed your New Year’s Resolution to do a Dry January), and tune into the hottest award show around on The Greatest Movie Ever Made! 

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

Christmas may have just come and gone, but TGMEM is keeping things cold and snowy as they venture to the harsh Scandinavian wilderness to talk about The Northman! It’s a film with a lot of yelling, a lot of blood and guts, and a lot of butts! Justus busts out a Bjork impression and David tries to get through the episode without dying via coughing fit (spoiler alert, it did not work). Close out the year with this Viking revenge saga on the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

The Northman (2022) is directed by Robert Eggers and stars Alexander Skarsgård, Nicole Kidman, Claes Bang, Ethan Hawke, and Anya Taylor-Joy

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

The Halloween Horrorthon continues truckin’ along and we have a delightfully demonic treat for this installment! This week, Bruce Campbell gets groovy with some Deadites as David and Justus talk about this classic slapstick splatter fest! Open up the Necronomicon and recite the incantations to find out if this is the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Evil Dead II (1987) is directed by Sam Raimi and stars Bruce Campbell, Sarah Berry, Dan Hicks, Kassie DePaiva, and Ted Raimi

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

The Horrorthon celebrations continue with the triumphant return of guest Tony Moschetti! This week, the trio discusses this cult classic straight from the wave of 80s kid power films. Hop on your bike and ride on down to the TGMEM clubhouse, it’s time to find out if Woflman has nards and if The Monster Squad is the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

The Monster Squad (1987) is directed by Fred Dekker and stars Andre Gower, Robby Kiger, Stephen Macht, Duncan Regehr, and Tom Noonan

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

TGMEM’s spooky season celebration returns with the bigger and better sequel, Halloween Horrorthon 2: Dead By Dawn! The festivities kick off with this genre-bending Halloween thriller, so come on in, stay for dinner, and grab a drink on this episode of the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

The Guest (2014) is directed by Adam Wingard and stars Dan Stevens, Maika Monroe, Brendan Meyer, Sheila Kelley, and Leland Orser.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

David and Justus waggle their dicks and become closer as friends this week as they discuss this British comedy. Meanwhile, they still have a few more things to say about The Judge and David discusses his home defense strategy (hint: it also involves him waggling his dick). Crank up the Donna Summer and shake your stuff on the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

The Full Monty (1997) is directed by Peter Cattaneo and stars Robert Carlyle, Mark Addy, Wim Snape, Steve Huison, and Tom Wilkinson.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

When David decided to pick The Judge for TGMEM’s next episode, he didn’t realize the insanity he was about to unleash upon himself and Justus. Join them as they explore the many plot lines, jarring tones, and bodily fluids of this legal drama. This week, Roberts Duvall and Downey Jr. unite for a show-stopping episode of the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

The Judge (2014) is directed by David Dobkin and stars Robert Downey Jr., Robert Duvall, Vera Farmiga, Vincent D’Onofrio, and Jeremy Strong.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

Pride AND PREJUDICE? It’s more likely than you think. On this installment of “TGMEM probably would have never covered this movie unless someone suggested it,” the Podmaster herself decides to subjugate the boys to this panties-soaking horny adaptation of Jane Austen’s classic. Flex your hand as you long for the touch of your partner’s hand, practice those dance moves, and get ready to trudge through the British moors to unite with your soulmate this week on the Greatest Movie Ever Made! Now with 100% more discourse about pig testicles! 

Pride & Prejudice (2005) is directed by Joe Wright and stars Keira Knightley, Matthew Macfadyen, Brenda Blethyn, Donald Sutherland, and Tom Hollander.

 Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

Well the years start comin’ and they don’t stop comin’ as Justus closes out the first TGMEM-iversary with a controversial take: Shrek actually bad maybe? Join the boys as they revisit this animated family film with farting and dick jokes and see if this meme classic still holds up all this time later. Shrek may be love, Shrek may be life, but is Shrek the Greatest Movie Ever Made?

Shrek (2001) is directed by Andrew Adamson and Vicky Jenson, and stars Mike Myers, Eddie Murphy, Cameron Diaz, John Lithgow, and Vincent Cassel.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

Justus continues the TGMEM-iversary festivities by selecting this classic hyperviolent Jesus metaphor directed by a Dutch pervert. Join the boys as they talk about the bullets, the squibs, and the 80s acting titans of the almighty RoboCop. Dead or alive, you’re going to find out if this is the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

RoboCop (1987) is directed by Paul Verhoeven and stars Peter Weller, Nancy Allen, Dan O’Herlihy, Ronny Cox, and Kurtwood Smith.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

The first annual TGMEM-iversary continues with the Emoji Movie. Abandoned by God and condemned to a fate worse than death, David and Justus gaze into the abyss and confront the incomprehensible horrors of late stage capitalism. But the scariest horror of all waits for them: the possibility that the Emoji Movie might be the Greatest Movie Ever Made.

The Emoji Movie (2017) is directed by Tony Leondis and stars TJ Miller, James Corden, Anna Faris, Maya Rudolph, and Steven Wright.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

The TGMEM boys celebrate 50 episodes and one year of the show the only way they know how: by talking about some shit that kicks ass. Join Gator Trap and Dicksmash as they break down the mind blowing action maximalism of this little known low budget action film. Crack open a cold one and celebrate the first TGMEMiversary on the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Stone Cold (1991) is directed by Craig R. Baxley and stars Brian Bosworth, Lance Henriksen,William Forsythe, Arabella Holzbog, and Sam McMurray.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

It’s the final TGMEM episode before Christmas, so of course the boys are rounding things out with another holiday classic. This year it’s the film with the most family friendly depiction of suicidal depression ever, starring America’s golden boy and possible pegging enthusiast Jimmy Stewart. Merry Christmas and a hearty “HEEHAW” from us at The Greatest Movie Ever Made!

It’s A Wonderful Life (1946) is directed by Frank Capra and stars James Stewart, Donna Reed, Lionel Barrymore, Thomas Mitchell, and Henry Travers

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

So ya thought ya might like to go to the show? To feel that warm thrill of dipshittery, that movie podcast glow? Well I’ve got some good news for you, sunshine, David and Justus are your hosts and they’ve got the most, and they came along to discuss and debate. They’re gonna find out if The Wall’s the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Pink Floyd - The Wall (1982) is directed by Alan Parker and starts Bob Geldof, Christine Hargreaves, James Laurenson, Eleanor David, and Kevin McKeon.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

This week, David and Justus pack their bags for dinosaur island to hang out with the raptor that says “ALAN,” that kid who harvests T. rex pee, and the ninja Spinosaurus. Is this often derided sequel actually the second best Jurassic Park movie? What are David and Justus’ favorite dinosaurs? Can they come up with ideas for Jurassic Park sequels that are better than the actual movies? Is this stupid and dumb movie the Greatest Movie Ever Made?

Jurassic Park III (2001) is directed by Joe Johnston and stars Sam Neill, William H. Macy, Tea Leoni, Alessandro Nivola, and Trevor Morgan.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

TGMEM’s S̴̄̄ͅh̸̢̯͒á̸̩̌́k̴͔̳̄y̴͇̓̈̕ ̵̙͂̓C̸̛̻̱̯͋̀ą̵̡̟̀m̶͓͊́ ̷̛̬͆S̵͉̽̈u̷̥͘͜m̵̧̺̺͒m̶̢͛̕ḛ̸̕̕r̷͈̣̗͆̎ ̵̟̲͂̀̆C̸͚̼͗a̶̢̐̑͘m̷̤͉̖̄̋̅p̶̟̮̻͋ came to a dramatic end with its episode on The Blair Witch Project. The m̴̞̤̤̅̀͝a̸͇̮͐l̵̻͚̀̿e̴̬͚̊̐͘v̷̡̠̄̋͂ǒ̸̠̔l̶̹̔̈́e̷͖̜̞͌́n̴͓͘t̴̨̓̍ ̵̜̈́̅f̵̖̅͂ͅo̶̥̜̔͜ŕ̴̠͍̼̓̕c̶̛̰̠̟e̶̬̟̩̔ş̷͂͘͘ present in their podcast studio had long made their presence known to the hosts, and yet they foolishly forged on anyway, discussing this classic found footage horror film in detail. This week, p̴̛̙̲̫̬̆̈́͌͆̈́̚ą̶̛̫̣̫͇͇̲̈́̀̆̚r̸̢̘͉͕̲̬̞̽̓̂͗̾͝a̵̰̝̭̳̪̟̓̊̀̚͝n̸̦̗̯̆̊̄͗o̷̧̻̤̭͐͐͠r̴̛̬͓̪̟̠̣͗̐̃͋̿̎m̸̧͎͈̝̤̳̀̈́͜͝ȃ̴͉̑ͅl̷̘̗͑̓̅ investigator Charlie Anwar explores this final recording, but what will happen when he discovers the truth behind the fate of the Ģ̸̖͓̜̥͚̠̜̭̬̻͚̹̦̗̫͉̞̣̭̳͉̑̎̃̇͋̏͑̿̌̕r̷̨̢̧̡͉̘̭͔̯̦̬̣͎̮̻̯̰͙̝̹̞͇̠͉͚̥̓̅͋̇͜͜ę̷̡̧̢̺̝̥̬̮͍̠̩̱̦͎̭͓̘̙͈̯̯̮̗̥̼̖͍̳̼̪̙̹͋͐̃̀́̔̑͐̃̈̈́̋̈̿̒̎́̅̆̅̾̋̄̎̕͘͘̚͘͝͝ͅā̸̜̜̉̍͒͑̓̈́͒̎̿̇̇̿̚͠t̵̛̳͙̼̭̼̙̳͕͉͚̲͔̩̗̟͓͙͎͇̤̤͙̹͉̻̻͓̫͈̗̪͉͓͓͓̑́̈́̇̒̆̀̉̐͐̿̕͜͜ȩ̸̧͕̭̦̬̫̤̙̹̤̜͎͉̱̂̽̎͂̄̌̀̔̾̈́͆̈́̍̊̍́̽̎̓̆̄͘̚͝͝͝͝͠š̷̛̮̊͋͜t̵̝̬̗͈͖̖̥̪̝͇͇̪͎͋̂̽́͛̔̓̊̇ͅ ̶̠̟̩̻̥̯̲͉̘̙͎̀͊̾͐̉̐̐̎̾̆͋͛̎́̑̈́̿̚ͅM̷̳̣͇̹̳̟̻̪̤̋ớ̷̡̛̛̜͕͉̻̞̙͓̮̦̬̦̭͚͕̘̘̟̭͖̌͑̄̿̾͗͂̍́͑͂̓̆̀͐̀͆̀͘̕͜͝ṽ̸̨̨̮̫͇̩̪͍͎͍͇̪͖̬̘̥̙̫͚͉͍͈̱̓́̾͐̽͆̆̌͛̏̈́̉̆̊̑̇̈́̓̇̒̋̊͂̽̃̕̚͘͜͝ͅi̸̢̤̭̼̳̖͕̤͙̣͚̘̾̔̾̆́̃͊͛̈́̋̋̎̎͒͆͆̔̑͑̅̊̂̇̈̋͆̽̄̕͜e̴̛̖͙̟̪̗̫̱͙̮̅̓̓͌̎͌̉̅̉̉́͂̃̇̂̓̿̍̽̈͛̉̏̋̓́͘̚͠͝ ̵̡̨̢̢̭̠̬̣̟̤̥͕̱̤̦̝͍̹̼̱̜̦̭̺̮̼̝̻͖̼̻̻̻̭̿̅͛̂͋̃͋̄̽̔̀̊͊̚ͅͅͅE̸̡̧̧̛̥͔̺̰̖͈͙̺͍̬̣̹̺̭͔̪͎͍̲̠̙̩̟̯̟͙͈̳̮͈̦̙̫̍̎̈́̏̓́̇̎̈́̔̄̎̍͛̑̑̓̐̾̏̇̋̚͝͝͠͝ͅv̴͓̙̗̱̠̲̰̅͊̽̂̿͑͂̃͆̒̀̋̄̄͒͘̕e̴̼̊͘̕͝r̸̛̛̤͖͈̗̖̤̹̥̝̺̙̩̟̀̐́̀̂͆͐̈́̾̒́̂̑̕͠ ̷̧̯̤̦͖̞͖̝̭̥͍̣̮̗̣̰͕̼͕͙̖̝͆̓͌͊͘͜M̵̡̛̛̼̖̿̑͐̋̽͋̈́̃̋̈̈̈́͛̑̌̕͠͝͝a̴̧̛̲̜̱̰̗͕̓͆͌̉͐͋͛̑̕̚͜͜ḑ̶̡̨̨̲̗̠̫̤̠̲̣͈͓͍̪̘̝̱̥͍̓̈́͗͋̇̅͑̉̌͂̈́̃̑̍̽̈́̓̑̑͋͂̾̋͐͗̚̕͘͜͠͝͝͝͝e̶̡̡̡̛̳̥̫̤̘͈̪̝̲̤̺̤̤̪̪̺̺̬̖̪͕̳̯̥͌̀̀̋͂̏̀̈́̂̀̔͋͜͜?

The Blair Witch Project (1999) is directed by Eduardo Sanchez and Daniel Myrick and stars Heather Donahue, Joshua Leonard and Michael C. Williams.

Special thanks to Dennis Verrett and Audrey Young.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

D̷̤̘̹̳̻̖̤̙̪̀̔͝ö̶̡̰̘̝͍̩̩̠̗͙͉͙̻̱͎̖̖͉͓̾͌̉̇͋͐͋̈͝͝͝n̵͖̻̬̳͍͕̠̮̪̙͍̿͗̊̀͠͝'̷̢̛͕̯̠͇̭͖̣͇͇̹̦͓͇̻̤͔͔̋̓̀̑͂̒͋̉̅̊͐̌̈́͊̿͒̃͛̆̌̿̔̎̚͘͘͝t̶̨̨̡̛̛̺̻͖͖̪̣͇͈̮̩͚̘̘̳̫̟̬̖̲͓̺͓͐̎̏͛͂̒͗̈́̋̿͋̏̀͗̉̉̔̐̇̋͆̀̆͌̍͛̉̚̚̚͝͠ ̵̠̪̪̮̈́l̸̨̡͍͖̖̮̫̬̮̫̹̺͔͛̔̈́̐̈́̽͒͌̅̏̊̈́̆̆ơ̸̡̧̬͍̺̥̘̣̰̘̝̮̘̖̮̦̙̈́̋͛̂͂̒́̔̊̓̂͒̈́̔̓̄͑̒͛̏̆̎̈͗̂͗͌̎̋̑̃̕͝͝͝ȍ̶̝̟̖͇͂̆̑̇̆̆́̄͑̈́̋̕͜k̶̨̖̥̱̞̣̝̲͔̞͕̞̗̱̫͓̻̪͔̙̫͐̓̿̎̍̇̉̌͒̑̏̀̈́́̿̕̚̚͝ ̷̡̨̡̨̨̻̣̯̱̗͍͙̗̖̻̱͓̘̫͈̹͎̥̖̩̞̺͙͓͎͐͐͑̓̎͗͒̈́̾̋̈́͂̀͝b̷̧̢̡̙͇̙̱̘͙̼̤̫̠̩̟̣̥̖̱̹͎̩̪̯͊̃̊̔̉̉̌̋̽͂̀̈́̾͐͝ę̷̢̨̨͙̦̠͙̜͈͙̥͔̭̬̼͕̠͚͉̭͚̬̦̭̬̘͈̤͛̾̾̅̊́̐̈̆͑̓̐̽̓̍̓͒͛̊̕͜ͅḩ̶̡̨̨̛̫̜͇͚̥̼̫̯̫͉̞͙̣̹͇͎̦̱̫̱͖͔͙̳̼̜̘̜͂́̔͌̏̓͑̈́̇͐̄̃̀͆̋̀̒̉̂̏͘͠͠͝͝ͅͅi̸̧̢̫̪̬̹̥̺̗̩̝̺̣̤̻̝̫͚̭̥̜̖̫͆̉͐̓̈̍̀̎̐̏͛̈̍͊͗̊̍̾̆͛̽́̀͑̀͘͘̚͠͠͝ͅn̶̢̨̞͉̦̼̳̥͇̠͈͍̻̬͊́͆͌͛̒͛͋̈́͑͘͜d̷̨̨̲̗̥̳͙͉̣̟̭̜͓̝̲̖̦̖̼̬͕̹̥̠̗͗͐̍̉̌̈́̚͜ͅͅ ̸̡̺̰̞̘̖̹͙͕͚̫̙͓͍̞̰̰͚͕̩̝̳̋̀͛̏͑͗̒́͂̍̏͋̿̓͒͛́́͋̓͒̕̕̚͝y̷̧̧̡͚͔̫̠͍̻̙̜͙̪̠͓͎̣̰͈͖̘̯̓̅͜ͅȱ̷͕͍̯̟̳̰͓͚̬̟͎̺͍̳̺̻͌̍̇̕͜͜u̶̢̧̨̧͍̦̰͚̯̣̞̫͍̙̹͉̪̗̥͙̱͖̟̲̖͈͕̹̝̝̳̿̋̃̓́͛͛̀́̀̈̒͊̍̚͘̕͘͠ͅͅ

Charlie Anwar’s search for David Scandura and Justus Burkitt has so far revealed nothing about the whereabouts of the idiotic podcast hosts. On this week’s installment of the duo’s final recordings, however, the supernatural forces that may be behind their disappearance begin to make their presence known in a dramatic fashion. David and Justus discuss a Romanian found footage psychological horror film, and the conversation they would have may just prove to be the biggest clue so far in the search for the Greatest Movie Ever Made podcast.

Be My Cat: A Film For Anne (2015) is directed by Adrian Tofei and stars Adrian Tofei, Sonia Teodoriu, Florentina Hariton and Alexandra Stroe.

Special thanks to Dennis Verrett and Valerie Moffat.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

What happened to David Scandura and Justus Burkitt? In Charlie Anwar’s search for answers, he has only found more questions. This week, he explores the second of four final recordings made by the podcast hosts: their episode on the Korean paranormal horror film Gonjiam: Haunted Asylum. Join him as the search for the Greatest Movie Ever Made podcast continues.

Gonjiam: Haunted Asylum (2018) is directed by Jung Bum-shik and stars Wa Ha-jun, Park Ji-hyun, Oh Ay-yeon, Moon Ye-won and Park Sung-hoon.

Special thanks to Dennis Verrett and Tony Moschetti.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

In July 2024, movie podcasters Justus Burkitt and David Scandura embarked on an episode series entitled “Shaky Cam Summer Camp.” These episodes would prove to be the final recordings of the duo. What happened to David and Justus, and does the truth behind their mysterious disappearance lie in their episode on found footage horror film As Above, So Below?  Join your host, Charlie Anwar, for a four episode investigation into the final fate of The Greatest Movie Ever Made.

As Above, So Below (2014) is directed by John Erick Dowdle and stars Perdita Weeks, Ben Feldman, Edwin Hodge, Francois Civil and Marion Lambert.

Special thanks to Dennis Verrett.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

The podcast welcomes Kelsey Hontz to discuss this cinematic adaptation of the off-Broadway musical about a plant that eats people! Join these mean green mothers from outer space and hear about all the musical numbers, special effects, and shockingly horny moments from Little Shop of Horrors this week on The Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Little Shop of Horrors (1986) is directed by Frank Oz and stars Rick Moranis, Ellen Greene, Vincent Gardenia, Levi Stubbs and Steve Martin.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

This week, David, Justus, and the Muscles from Brussels head to Hong Kong to fight in an illegal underground fighting tournament that Actually Totally Happened Guys Trust Me! Join us for the pec-flexiest, screamiest, splits-to-nuts-punchiest episode of The Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Bloodsport (1988) is directed by Newt Arnold and stars Jean-Claude Van Damme, Bolo Yeung, Donald Gibb, Leah Ayres and Norman Burton.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

Justus and David touch down on some Tumblr sad girl shit this week as they chronicle the nightly activities of a young Iranian vampire who loves skateboarding, eating people, scaring children and jamming to indie rock. Hear our hosts discuss the first Iranian vampire western and find out if it’s the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night (2014) is directed by Ana Lily Amirpour and stars Sheila Vand, Arash Marandi, Marshall Manesh, Mozhan Marno and Dominic Rains.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

It’s time to solve the demonic Rubik’s cube and experience pain and pleasure beyond your imagination! Journey through the labyrinth and meet your Cenobite hosts, as they discuss this film’s single cheap hallway set, single cheap matte painting, multiple cheap stop motion effects and the evil floating shape in the sky. We have such sights to show you this week on the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Hellbound: Hellraiser II (1988) is directed by Tony Randel and stars Ashley Laurence, Clare Higgins, Kenneth Cranham, Imogen Boorman and Doug Bradley.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

Gather the family ‘round for this holiday double feature episode, covering the first two installments of the Silent Night, Deadly Night Christmas horror franchise. David and Justus tell the tale of two killer Santas, two Christmas Eve killing sprees, and two notoriously controversial holiday horror films. Merry Garbage Day to one and all on this special episode of The Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Silent Night, Deadly Night (1984) is directed by Charles E. Sellier Jr. and stars Lilyan Chauvin, Gilmer McCormick, Toni Nero, Robert Brian Wilson, and Charles Dierkop.

Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2 (1987) is directed by Lee Harry and stars Eric Freeman, James Newman, Elizabeth Kaitan, Jean Miller, and Darrel Guilbeau.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

The boys are back to discuss yet another Justus Burkitt Childhood Classic™ with this 80s fantasy film. George Lucas crawls out the walls of the podcast studio once again, but this time, he’s shamelessly ripping off Tolkien. Meanwhile, David advocates for genocide and treating yourself to a delicious hamburger. I don’t know what either of those things have to do with figuring out if Willow is the Greatest Movie Ever Made.

Willow (1988) is directed by Ron Howard and stars Warwick Davis, Val Kilmer, Joanne Whalley, Jean Marsh and Patricia Hayes. 

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

What a podcast, what a lovely podcast! The show rolls down the post-apocalyptic highway to hell this week to discuss this mind-boggling action spectacle from mastermind George Miller. Join your resident War Boys, David and Justus, as they talk about all the cars, characters and themes of the crazy world of Mad Max on this episode of The Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Mad Max: Fury Road (2015) is directed by George Miller and stars Tom Hardy, Charlize Theron, Nicholas Hoult, Hugh Keays-Byrne and Josh Helman.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

Peggy Sue got married. But what if she didn’t? What if, by some magical force, she was transported back to 1960 to relive high school? What if didn’t end up marrying Nicolas Cage and his wang, and instead married an edgelord beatnik or an angsty nerd? These are the questions asked by this film directed by…*checks notes* Francis Ford COPPOLA?!?! Whew, okay, I couldn’t have called that. Anyway, David and Justus also have some questions about Peggy Sue, like why didn’t she also use her time to stop the Kennedy assassination and the Manson murders? And is this film that is, once again, inexplicably directed by the same guy who made the Godfather the Greatest Movie Ever Made?

Peggy Sue Got Married (1986) is directed by Francis Ford Coppola and stars Kathleen Turner, Nicolas Cage, Barry Miller, Catherine Hicks and Joan Allen.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

Ape podcast. Apes talk about ape movie. Charlton Heston want to bang ape and shoot ape with gun. Apes want to cut off Charlton Heston balls. Oooh ooh ahh ahh. Ape throw poop at you and eat banana. Is ape movie Greatest Movie Ever Made? 

Planet of the Apes (1968) is directed by Franklin J. Schaffner and stars Charlton Heston, Roddy McDowall, Kim Hunter, Maurice Evans and Linda Harrison.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

Excuse me…I believe you have my podcast. It’s Office Space, dipshits! Join our fearless hosts as they discuss this 90s comedy, commiserate over sharing stories of working for psychopathic bosses and bemoan the horrors of our capitalist dystopia. Crank up the gangsta rap and battle that case of the Mondays this week on the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Office Space (1999) is directed by Mike Judge and stars Ron Livingston, Jennifer Aniston, David Herman, Ajay Naidu and Diedrich Bader.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

This week, David celebrates his favorite corporate-manufactured pop culture holiday, Alien Day. He and Justus ship out on the Nostromo to cover the 1979 original classic film that spawned a franchise centered around an evil penis monster in spaaaaace! Press play on your podcatcher to open up the xenomorph egg and take all 2 hours and 45 minutes of this episode straight down the throat like a facehugger because fuck you, Alien is the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Alien (1979) is directed by Ridley Scott and stars Tom Skerritt, Sigourney Weaver, Veronica Cartwright, Harry Dean Stanton and John Hurt.

Justus and David take things back to Bible study to discuss this faith-based animated family musical from their Christian upbringings. Listen to them square off like Moses and Ramses as David threatens to destroy Justus’ podcast empire with plagues of bagel-related tangents, Star Wars impressions, and sexy horses. Celebrate the Jewish holiday of Passover with our two notably non-Jewish hosts this week on the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

The Prince of Egypt (1998) is directed by Simon Wells, Steve Hickner and Brenda Chapman and stars Val Kilmer, Ralph Fiennes, Michelle Pfieffer, Sandra Bullock and Jeff Goldblum.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

Justus and David touch down on a critical and box office failure from the early 2010s (that’s totally not trying to rip off 300, seriously guys), but it’s from an underappreciated director they both love! Hopefully this goes well! If not, they’ll at least get to see a lot of people get decapitated along the way. Tune in to hear the boys talk about this Roman Empire action thriller that no one cares about this week on the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Centurion (2010) is directed by Neil Marshall and stars Michael Fassbender, Olga Kurylenko, David Morissey, Liam Cunningham and Dominic West.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

Guest Kevin Hurley joins the boys this week to discuss another Actually Good Movie. Together, they venture off into the night with John Cassavettes, Peter Falk and director Elaine May on a strange and darkly funny journey into the human soul. Find out if Mikey and Nickey is the Greatest Movie Ever Made! Mikey and Nickey (1976) is directed by Elaine May and stars Peter Falk, John Cassavettes, Ned Beatty, Rose Arrick and Carol Grace. Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

This week, our fearless hosts enroll in Miskatonic University and get deep in the goop to discuss Stuart Gordon’s zombie horror comedy Re-Animator! Justus attempts to debut his new “calm Justus” persona and David fawns over the film’s outrageous performances and gore effects. Don’t lose your head; it’s time for another episode of the Greatest Movie Ever Made! 

Re-Animator (1985) is directed by Stuart Gordon and stars Jeffery Combs, Bruce Abbott, Barbara Crampton, David Gale and Robert Sampson.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas, both around the TGMEM offices and around the seedy New York dreamscape of Stanley Kubrick’s Eyes Wide Shut! This week, David and Justus explore the deceit, lust, and clandestine orgy clubs of this heartwarming holiday classic. Do you know the second password? It’s “The Greatest Movie Ever Made!”

Eyes Wide Shut (1999) is directed by Stanley Kubrick and stars Tom Cruise, Nicole Kidman, Sydney Pollack, Marie Richardson, and Rade Šerbedžija.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

David and Justus tackle some dreaded capeshit for babies this week, but thank god it’s at least a Sam Raimi film! Listen to the dynamic duo go full Green Goblin mode, debate if Aunt May actually sucks and try to imitate all the insane New York extras in this generation-defining superhero movie. BRING US PICTURES OF SPIDER-MAN this week on the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Spider-Man (2002) is directed by Sam Raimi and stars Tobey Maguire, Willem Dafoe, Kirsten Dunst, James Franco and Cliff Robertson.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

This week David and Justus welcome Audrey Young to the show to discuss a 90s teen horror cult classic that influenced a generation of young women. Hear the trio go gaga for 90s horror icons Fairuza Balk, Neve Campbell, Skeet Ulrich and that ethereal lady who runs the witchcraft store in this movie! Join the circle, enter the coven and call upon the powers of Manon on The Greatest Movie Ever Made! The Craft (1996) is directed by Andrew Fleming and stars Robin Tunney, Faruzia Balk, Neve Campbell, Rachel True and Skeet Ulrich. Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

THE SPOILERS MUST FLOW on this special episode from TGMEM! David and Justus are back to deliver a double dose of Dune deep dives to their devoted dipshits. Take the Water of Life and hear them discuss all the juicy details of this blockbuster sequel. Join Muad’Dib’s uprising and fight for Arrakis this week on the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Dune: Part Two (2024) is directed by Denis Villeneuve and stars Timothée Chalamet, Zendaya, Rebecca Ferguson, Josh Brolin and Austin Butler.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

Our hosts don their suits you can pee and poop in and venture into the deep deserts of Arrakis to discuss Denis Villeneuve’s epic adaptation of…well, roughly 50% of Frank Herbert’s landmark science fiction novel. Catch the boys at their nerdiest as they ramble for nearly three uninterrupted hours about the most minute and inconsequential details of the Dune universe. Hop on the sandworm with David, Justus and George Lucas (?) and find out if this is The Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Dune: Part One (2021) is directed by Denis Villeneuve and stars Timothée Chalamet, Rebecca Ferguson, Oscar Isaac, Josh Brolin and Stellan Skarsgård.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

David concludes his mandated Valentine’s Month with a bang by discussing this romantic action comedy romp courtesy of James Cameron and Arnold Schwarzenegger. Hear the slow degradation of David and Justus’ Schwarzenegger impressions over the course of these two and a half hours as they talk about the one liners, explosions, misogyny and (yikes!) Islamophobia of True Lies! Listen to this episode of the Greatest Movie Ever Made! Do it! DO IT NAHHOW!

True Lies (1994) is directed by James Cameron and stars Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jamie Lee Curtis, Tom Arnold, Bill Paxton, and Tia Carrere.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

David’s mandated Valentine’s Month takes a depressing turn this week as our hosts explore the loveless marriage at the heart of Blue Valentine. Certified Wife Guy Justus meets his match with Ryan Gosling’s deadbeat balding husband Dean. David fantasizes about torturing Bobby Ontario. Is the dog that dies at the beginning of this movie more worthy of mourning than the slowly decaying marriage of Ryan Gosling and Michelle Williams? Check into this sketchy sex motel and find out on this episode of The Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Blue Valentine (2010) is directed by Derek Cianfrance and stars Ryan Gosling, Michelle Williams, John Doman, Mike Vogel and Ben Shenkman. 

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

David’s February podcast takeover continues with this holiday slasher straight from the Great White North! Welcome to Valentine Bluffs, a cozy Canadian town known for its love of Valentine’s Day and mining-themed slasher villains. When you’re done getting hot and heavy with your Valentine down in the bowels of the Hanniger Mine, head over to the Cage to hear the spooky bartender recount the legend of the Valentine’s Day curse. Say hello to Mabel at the laundromat, join Hollis in the local junkyard for a car engine sandwich and open up that heart-shaped chocolate box to see what Harry Warden has left for you! You’ll be “soory” if you don’t tune in for this episode of the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

My Bloody Valentine (1981) is directed by George Mihalka and stars Paul Kelman, Lori Hallier, Neil Affleck, Keith Knight and Cynthia Dale.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

David takes control of the podcast for the entire month of February with a slate of romantic and Valentine’s Day-themed programming! In this episode, he yanks the steering wheel and turns onto the highway to horny town with David Cronenberg’s dark tale of car crashes and sex. Should Crash be the next big Hollywood cinematic universe? Why do women in this movie only take one boob out? And, most importantly, is any of this freaky car crash sex hot? Tune into The Greatest Movie Ever Made to find out! 

Crash (1996) is directed by David Cronenberg and stars James Spader, Holly Hunter, Elias Koteas, Deborah Kara Unger and Rosanna Arquette.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

This week, David and Justus board the rattling ark for a steampunk train ride to discuss Bong Joon-Ho’s Snowpiercer. Justus loses his mind about how freezing a dude’s arm and smashing it with a hammer is a pretty awesome torture method. David, on the other hand, unveils his Advanced Willy Wonka Theory and how this film applies to it. And together, the boys both agree that the protein bars made of bugs kinda look delicious. Grab a hand axe and fight back against the ruling class on this post-apocalyptic installment of The Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Snowpiercer (2013) is directed by Bong Joon-Ho and stars Chris Evans, Song Kang-Ho, John Hurt, Tilda Swinton and Jamie Bell. 

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

This week’s episode finds our hosts once again out of their element as they discuss the feminist and LGBT readings of this comedy classic. Hear David go wild for a young Geena Davis, Justus vehemently stan Teri Garr and both of them relentlessly talk shit about Dustin Hoffman’s Michael Dorsey. Plus, tune in for a brief story about Justus’ stint as an extra in an episode of Westworld. That sounds fun! Whip out the lipstick and get ready for another installment of The Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Tootsie (1982) is directed by Sydney Pollack and stars Dustin Hoffman, Jessica Lange, Teri Garr, Dabney Coleman, and Charles Durning.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

Thanksgiving’s right around the corner, and David and Justus are celebrating with this obscure 80’s Thanksgiving slasher. It might have three different official titles and be really hard to find on the internet, but that can’t be because it’s a bad movie, right? Set the table and say grace with David, Justus, gigachad slasher Terry, Condom Salesman Ted Raimi, and Sloppy Drunk Single Mom. That’s not cranberry sauce, it’s a delicious Thanksgiving themed installment of the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Blood Rage (1987) is directed by John Grissmer and stars Louise Lasser, Mark Soper, Marianne Kanter, Julie Gordon, and Jayne Bentzen.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

This week, David guides Justus through the wild and wonderful world of Wakaliwood, a Ugandan film studio based in the slums of the country’s capital, Kampala. They’re discussing the studio’s breakout international hit, Who Killed Captain Alex?. Filmed for a shockingly low budget of less than $200, this wholly unique action comedy has amassed an internet following and brought the Wakaliwood team onto the world stage. What the heck is a “video joker?” Is this the best usage of Seal’s “Kiss from a Rose” in film history? Does everybody in Uganda know kung fu? It’s time to “expect the unexpectable” on this episode of the Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Support the Wakaliwood team: https://wakaliwood.com/, https://www.patreon.com/wakaliwood 

Who Killed Captain Alex? (2010) is directed by Nabwana I.G.G. and stars Kakule William, Sserunya Ernest, G. Puffs, Bukenya Charles, and VJ Emmie.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

David and Justus aren’t interested in doing any actual work to start the New Year, so this week, they kick back, crack open a couple of cold ones and talk about the highs and lows of the 2023 film season. Join them as they reflect on a wild year of box office bombs, Hollywood strikes and that beautiful time when the movies were simultaneously ruled by a nuclear physicist and a plastic girl doll. We’re counting down the top 5 best movies of 2023 on the Greatest Movie Ever Made! Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

The American Film Institute rated Sunset Boulevard #16 on the 2007 edition of their 100 Years…100 Movies list. This week, the legacy of this acclaimed film is sullied and tarnished by appearing on the TGMEM podcast! Tune in to hear Justus and David peel back the layers of the film noir classic to get to the bottom of this seedy tale of Hollywood’s darkside. Together, they uncover mysteries like the Black Dahlia Murderer’s foray into killing monkeys, Cecil B. DeMille’s boundless bloodlust for horses and the devious wiles of a stone-cold cougar reliving her glory days in her lavish Hollywood mansion. Who cares about the AFI? It’s time for Justus and David to settle, once and for all, if Sunset Boulevard is The Greatest Movie Ever Made!

Sunset Boulevard (1950) is directed by Billy Wilder and stars William Holden, Gloria Swanson, Erich von Stroheim, Nancy Olsen, and Fred Clark.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio

Gather the family around the fire for a cozy holiday installment of the show as your resident Muppet hosts discuss a Christmas classic from their childhoods. What is Christmas like on Arrakis? Are Statler and Waldorf in league with the Cenobites? Is the Ghost of Christmas Present ripping farts under his huge coat? How did a frog knock up a pig? Is the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come’s face actually a giant spectral butthole? Join us for these and other holiday hijinks on this festive and fun episode of The Greatest Movie Ever Made! 

The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992) is directed by Brian Henson and stars Michael Caine, Dave Goelz, Steve Whitmire, Jerry Nelson and Frank Oz.

Music: “Fractals” by Kyle Casey and White Bat Audio