The Great Trans American Road Trip – Details, episodes & analysis

*Scroll to the bottom for updates*

Join us from Boise, Idaho as we discuss what it takes to feel safe as a trans person in the United States during a profoundly unsafe time. How do we escape scarcity enough to show up for each other, and what do we do when learning one new thing about ourselves topples the identity Jenga tower all together?

In this episode, we talk gay doctors, slime allergies, the social media projection machine, and why Xilo is a truly terrible Catholic. We also tackle questions like “can you really ‘choose your hard’?”, “Is therapy the new crypto?”, and “is Portland, Oregon really the trans promised land?”

There’s only one way to find out for sure.

If you’d like to join in the conversation about our “Top 10” stops so far, you can find the Instagram post mentioned in-episode here

**Update: The phrase "choose your hard” we heard from our interview with Kam who is an amazing trans writer and parent that lives an hour outsides of Salt Lake City!

Join us from Bend, Oregon as we discuss passing and identity perception. What do we do when the way we see ourselves and the way others see us doesn’t line up? What control do we have over it, if any, and how does it impact our safety and sense of self as we travel the country? In this episode, we talk clothing-optional gay men's resorts in Palm Springs, on trying (and failing) to “just be lesbians,” being soft in a world that tries to harden us, how biracial experiences are eerily similar to trans ones, what it’s like to be heckled by a teenage river rat, and the concept of “double consciousness.”

Why has Xilo “always felt really connected to corn”? Listen and find out with us!

Join us from Ashland, Oregon as we talk all about the ins and outs of grief. Why does it feel so hard to do it right, and what are we supposed to do when there’s no time or space to grieve?

In this episode we talk about rituals and cultural touchstones for grief, how our brains work super hard to keep us safe even when it fucks us over, and what it’s like to get paid to infodump onto teenagers. We’ll also explore emotional constipation, the myth of “applying yourself,” and why tarot readings are one of the secrets to feeling things.

*The books mentioned and quoted in this episode are The Tao of Fully Feeling by Pete Walker, The Wild Unknown Archetype Guidebook by Kim Krans, Atlas of the Heart by Brene Brown, and Trauma and Recovery by Judith Herman.

Join us (again) from Ashland, Oregon as we talk about the absolutely bonkers news cycle of the last week, but mostly about co-regulation.

In this episode, we talk about why traditional 9-5s can be so soul-crushing for trans and neurodivergent people, why we think our parents never taught us how to talk about money, and how to build a “regulation charcuterie.”

We’ll also explore the differences between “the silent treatment” and “going nonverbal,” why you can’t just skip “the debrief,” and what to do when your partner (or anyone else) crawls back into bed at 11am with a case of the sads.

The PIVOT method we mention at minute 25 can be found HERE

Join us from a redwood forest somewhere in California as we talk about magic mushrooms.

In this episode, we talk about the D.A.R.E. generation, the ins and outs of tripping, this one time where Flint was a net, and hot girls with tummy troubles.

We’ll also explore neuroplasticity and psilocybin, the day we figured out the meaning of life, why Xilo is still limping two days after our last trip, and the reasons we’ll be tending to our internal fires for the rest of our lives.

*The book mentioned in this episode is Be Here Now by Ram Dass

*Psychedelic Coaching and Peer Support Line

*MAPS Psychedelic Integration Station

*How to Dose Magic Mushrooms

*Correction: Flint mentions that he took a full dose of 4mg, but he actually meant 4g

Join us from Las Vegas, Nevada as we talk about trans endurance and community in the middle of what feels like a vast and endless desert.

In this episode, we talk to Dr. Archie Grimley, MD, AAHIVS, a non-binary doctor who has built a practice and personal oasis in the southern tip of Nevada. In our interview, we’ll discuss medical courage and the epidemic of pre-compliance, trans broken arm syndrome, and why we should probably hold off on bickering about “he/him” lesbians until after the apocalypse.

If you want to connect with Dr. Archie, you can find them on Instagram at queerdoctor_.

Join us from Salt Lake City, Utah as we talk about trans resilience in the face of almost unthinkably harsh conditions.

In this episode, we talk to Kam, a non-binary parent in a split-religion household who left the Church of Later Day Saints after attempting to reconcile their lifelong faith with their newly-discovered truth. In our interview, we’ll discuss parenting while trans, transitioning with limited (or no) support from a spouse, and coming home to yourself after years of self-abandonment.

We’ll also explore crying (we do, and you absolutely will too), unmasking gender and autism at the same time, and the transformative power of Depeche Mode.

Content warnings for this episode: suicide attempt, self-harm, ex-LDS

If you’d like to connect with Kam, you can find them on Instagram at-enby.nd.k

Join us from Bakersfield, CA while we talk about the idea of “home” as trans people in this supremely weird and terrifying moment.

In this episode, we discuss family estrangement, why being in a perpetual state of “crisis mode” can be addicting, and what to do when your home rejects you and you have to redefine it entirely.

We’ll also explore why there are so many transmascs in Humboldt, a really devastating metaphor about scuba diving, putting bows on porta potties, and taking intermediate bowling classes with Topanga from Boy Meets World.

In under an hour, we’ll attempt to answer: what does home really mean when you feel like you aren’t supposed to be anywhere?