Sobriety Bestie Podcast – Details, episodes & analysis

After years in Alcoholics Anonymous — and a lifetime of seeking belonging in controlling systems — Teri realized she didn’t need to dim her light or outsource her thinking anymore.

This raw and powerful conversation explores what it’s really like to leave AA, find your voice again, and build a new life rooted in freedom, truth, genuine connection and self-trust.

Timestamps:

00:00 Best Thinking Got Her Out Of AA Intro

01:08 Leaving AA

05:33 Staying Silent, Guilt + Mormon Roots

08:24 AA Was Helpful + Also Emotionally Damaging

10:35 Deprogram Lounge

13:10 AA Cult Within A Cult

17:04 Teri's Evolution After AA

26:02 Healing Trust Issues + Group Trauma

36:21 Hardest Part of Leaving AA

39:48 Making Friends After AA

49:09 Scared to Join a Deprogramming Group

58:32 Speaking About Leaving AA

1:14:17 Drinking Around Social Issues

1:17:04 Leaving AA Was Harder Than Getting Sober

1:30:04 Deprogramming Course + Group

1:46:54 Is Deprogramming a "Cult" or Forever?

1:55:46 Freedom From Group Think

2:02:45 Still in Recovery?

2:13:14 Best Part of Leaving AA

🌀 Deprogram AA Course

📚 Deprogram Book List

🪩 Community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge

Let’s get f*cking free.

You’re Angry. You’re Resentful. You’re a Dry Drunk. You’ll Be Drunk in Five Years.

Have you ever heard things like this? 👀

Today’s episode dives into the #1 way AA defenders come for you (and why it’s actually a logical fallacy).

This one’s a total game-changer in our Critical Thinking Series, because once you see this pattern — you can’t unsee it. We’re breaking down how ad hominem (Latin for “to the person”) and appeal to authority show up in arguments, manipulation, and cult-like thinking — not just in AA, but everywhere.

00:00 Way Angry AA's Come For You Intro

01:28 Ad Hominem

04:35 Appeal to Authority

07:24 Staying Safe From Manipulation

14:18 Dry Drunk Mythology

18:06 Ad Hominem Deeper Dive

Whether you’re deprogramming from a high-control group, rethinking recovery, or just learning to trust your own brain again — this one’s for you.

🌀 Deprogram AA Course

📚 Deprogram Book List

🪩 Get free tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge

Let’s get f*cking free.

Have you ever caught yourself spinning on a decision — looping between “what if” and “maybe not”? You’re not alone.

In this episode, I’m sharing 5 powerful ways to stop second-guessing yourself, especially if you’re leaving AA, deconstructing 12-step ideology, or just learning to trust your own thinking again.

By the end of this video, you’ll understand:

• Why second-guessing happens
• How to spot cognitive dissonance in real time
• A simple move to get unstuck fast

This is for anyone who’s been taught to doubt themselves — by society, religion, recovery programs, or high-control groups — and is now reclaiming their critical thinking, intuition, and freedom.

Timestamps:

00:00 Stop Second Guessing Yourself in Recovery intro

00:59 Why I Was Second Guessing Myself After Leaving AA

03:30 1 - Cognitive Dissonance

11:32 2 - Fear of Mistakes or Regrets

16:45 3- Conditioning and Authority

23:36 4 - Perfectionism and Control

29:08 5 - Threat Mode Biology

38:55 Recap 5 Ways to Stop Second Guessing Yourself

🌀 Deprogram AA Course

📚 Deprogram Book List

🪩 Get free tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚

👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here

Let’s get f*cking free.

How AA Is Controlling Your Mind part 8 of 8. Today we unpack one of the most disturbing tactics of all: Dispensing of Existence. 😳

Inside Alcoholics Anonymous, you’re either a disciple or you’re in danger.

If you stay, you’re “spiritually fit.” If you leave, you’re erased. Labeled a ticking time bomb. A danger to others. Spiritually dead.

This episode breaks down:

🔹 How AA makes you fear life outside the program

🔹 Why people shun you when you leave (and what that really means)

🔹 The cult-coded language that equates leaving with dying

🔹 Why your identity, safety, and existence are only “valid” inside the system

🔹 And how Bill W. sold it all with a pitch, not a prescription

If you’ve ever felt ghosted, dismissed, or demonized for walking away from AA — this is the episode you’ve been waiting for.

Here's the video I mentioned: 30 Signs of Emotional Manipulation

🧘🏼‍♀️ FREE RESOURCES to jumpstart your evolution 👇

📖 30 Signs of Emotional Manipulation Guide

🧠 Neurodivergent Discovery Portal 

📺 My TED talk on trauma + addiction

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER with the online deprogramming AA course👇

🌀 Deprogram AA

Welcome back to our Deprogramming AA series — 8 Signs AA Is Controlling Your Mind. In this episode, we’re diving into Doctrine Over Person, a hallmark of mind control tactics from Dr. Robert Jay Lifton’s thought reform framework.

🧠 Inside AA, your personal experiences, trauma, instincts, and emotions are often dismissed if they conflict with the doctrine — the Big Book, the steps, the slogans, or a sponsor's opinion. You're told:

• “That's not in the book.”
• “You’re in denial.”
• “You didn’t do it right.”
• “You need to do more steps.”

That’s how the doctrine always wins. You are gaslit into distrusting yourself.

In this episode, I talk about:

• How trauma is reframed as your fault ("What's your part in it?")
• How doubt is labeled denial
• How questioning is pathologized
• Why “It works if you work it” is a blame-loop, not a helpful slogan
• The hypocrisy of AA dismissing modern science and outside help
• How the doctrine overrides common sense, self-trust, and even medical care

And I share a vulnerable story: the time I was told to make amends to someone who harmed me, and how I now see the steps were often a vehicle for suppressing trauma, not healing it.

🧘🏼‍♀️ GO DEEPER WITH ONLINE COURSES 👇

🌀 Deprogram AA 

🦁 Liberated in Sober Skin

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

What happens when a trauma survivor is told inside Alcoholics Anonymous that they need to make amends… for their own abuse?

Today we're looking at the disturbing truth about how the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous can retraumatize survivors, especially women. From misguided sponsorship to silence baked into AA culture, this clip from the Group Thinking Podcast exposes the emotional and psychological harm caused by the amends process.

Want help deprogramming AA?

🌀 Deprogram AA Course here

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

@SobrietyBestie

Let’s get f*cking free.

I was in AA for 10 years then something began to shift, AA started to no longer seem true.

If you’re in that in-between space—questioning, unraveling, sensing that something’s off—you are not bananas. You’re waking up.

Want help deprogramming, check out my Deprogram AA course:

🌀 Deprogram AA

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

P.S. Here's the video I mention, What made AA ideology shatter

AA’s language isn’t just weird — it’s weaponized.

In Part 6 of this 8-part series on How AA Controls Your Mind, we break down Loaded Language — one of the most powerful (and dangerous) tactics used in high-control groups like Alcoholics Anonymous.

From phrases like “Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic” to “Feelings aren’t facts” and “It works if you work it,” AA uses thought-stopping slogans to control identity, shut down thinking, and keep you locked into the system.

Deprogramming AA course:

🌀 Deprogram AA 

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

🎙️ 8 Signs AA Is Controlling Your Mind – Part 5: Sacred Science

Welcome to the Sobriety Bestie Podcast. I'm Kirsten, your hostess and friend in this deprogramming adventure—where we’re reclaiming our minds from AA ideology and taking our power back.

In today’s episode, we dive into Sacred Science, the 5th sign in Dr. Robert Jay Lifton’s thought reform model. We explore how Alcoholics Anonymous frames its doctrine as absolute truth, discouraging questions, outside help, and critical thinking.

🚨 When the Big Book becomes the ultimate authority and obedience is confused with spirituality, you're no longer healing—you're being controlled.

💡 Topics we cover:

• How the Big Book became untouchable dogma
• The weaponization of “it works if you work it”
• Why questioning AA is treated like heresy
• The danger of sacred science in high-control groups
• How to reclaim your autonomy and THINK for yourself

🧠 Recovery is a path—not a prison. Truth doesn’t fear questions. Let’s break the spell.

Want to deeper dive? Explore my online courses:

🌀 Deprogram AA 

🦁 Liberated in Sober Skin

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.

AA Comes for You — What Happened When I Told the Truth

I was in AA for 10 years. I left in 2020. But when I started talking publicly about it in 2025, everything changed.

This episode is about the backlash. The DMs. The control disguised as concern. The friends who got weird. And the culty energy that came pouring in when I finally spoke the truth.

If you’ve felt the pressure to stay silent… If you’ve felt the shame, the phobia indoctrination, or the gaslighting from people still inside…

You are not bananas.

You’re waking up.

And you’re not alone.

Want to recover from AA? Check out my deprogramming AA course:

🌀 Deprogram AA 

💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestie

DM me or reply to any post on IG or FB. I’m here for the conversation.

Let’s get f*cking free.