Explore every episode of the podcast Resilient Kid: Therapy and tips for raising strong kids and teens
| Title | Pub. Date | Duration | |
|---|---|---|---|
| S13E2 - The Brain That Walks Into Your Classroom | The Resilient Classroom | 13 Oct 2026 | 00:18:37 | |
Why can a child manage their phonics on Tuesday but not on Monday morning? Following World Mental Health Day, psychotherapist and neurodiversity practitioner Ashley Costello takes educators inside the developing brain. She explains why a stressed child can't learn, what "flipping your lid" really means, and how a predictable routine can keep more children in their learning zone. This six-part series is for primary teachers, teaching assistants, SENCOs, and pastoral staff. It draws on Ashley's new book, An Educator's Guide to Raising Resilient Learners. In this episode:
The hand model in four steps:
Next week: What behaviour is trying to tell us. The iceberg beneath the behaviour, and why "attention-seeking" may be the most misunderstood phrase in education. Find out more & Links: • Hand model of the brain video: https://youtu.be/SnBx9AKMsLc?si=NWgLzel8zkB_XKUJ Follow us on Social Media: • Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/resilientkiduk The upstairs/downstairs brain, hand model, and window of tolerance draw on the work of Dr Daniel Siegel. The Resilient Kid Podcast is produced by Chantelle Venter at maddatu.com on behalf of The Resilient People, trading as The Resilient Kid, The Resilient Teen and The Resilient School. | |||
| S13E1 - Why Resilience, Why Now? | The Resilient Classroom | 08 Oct 2026 | 00:19:14 | |
Why are so many children arriving at school already in survival mode, and what can educators actually do about it? In the first episode of The Resilient Classroom, psychotherapist and neurodiversity practitioner Ashley Costello shares the story of the lion in the attic, looks at how childhood has changed, and introduces GROW: a simple, honest framework for turning mistakes into the place where resilience is built. This six-part series is for primary teachers, teaching assistants, SENCOs, and pastoral staff. It draws on Ashley's new book, An Educator's Guide to Raising Resilient Learners. In this episode:
The GROW framework:
Next week: The brain that walks into your classroom. Upstairs and downstairs brain, the hand model, and why Mondays can be the hardest day. Find out more & Links: • An Educator's Guide to Raising Resilient Learners (Waitlist): https://theresilienthub.co.uk/educators-guide-waitlist Follow us on Social Media: • Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/resilientkiduk The Resilient Kid Podcast is produced by Chantelle Venter at maddatu.com on behalf of The Resilient People, trading as The Resilient Kid, The Resilient Teen and The Resilient School. | |||
| S12E4 - The Way Back In - THE FRAMEWORK | 20 Sep 2026 | 00:20:40 | |
"The slow way back is generally the fast way home." — Ashley Costello WHAT THIS EPISODE IS ABOUT ⏱️ EPISODE TIMESTAMPS 📋 TOP TIPS FOR PARENTS & TEACHERS 📚 RESOURCES & REFERENCES 🎧 LISTENERS’ LOUNGE & RESOURCES • Website: theresilientacademy.co.uk Produced by Chantelle Venter at maddatu.com on behalf of The Resilient Kid. | |||
| S12E03 - The Ones Who Stop Showing Up The Anxiety Behind the Absence | 16 Sep 2026 | 00:23:07 | |
The Resilient Kid Podcast "The loudest sign of school avoidance is often silence... With a teen, the bedroom door stays shut." — Ashley Costello WHAT THIS EPISODE IS ABOUT ⏱️ EPISODE TIMESTAMPS 📋 TOP TIPS FOR PARENTS & TEACHERS 📚 RESOURCES & REFERENCES 🎧 LISTENERS’ LOUNGE & RESOURCES • Website: theresilientacademy.co.uk Produced by Chantelle Venter at maddatu.com on behalf of The Resilient Kid. | |||
| S12E2 - Small and Scared -The Anxiety Behind the Absence | 10 Sep 2026 | 00:21:09 | |
"The goal is not to eliminate every moment of distress... The goal is to build patiently, predictably, the lived evidence that they can be separated and still survive, that they can do hard things." — Ashley Costello WHAT THIS EPISODE IS ABOUT ⏱️ EPISODE TIMESTAMPS 📋 TOP TIPS FOR PARENTS & TEACHERS 📚 RESOURCES & REFERENCES 🎧 LISTENERS’ LOUNGE & RESOURCES 🔗 USEFUL LINKS & CONNECT WITH US Produced by Chantelle Venter at maddatu.com on behalf of The Resilient Kid. | |||
| S12E01 - The Anxiety Behind the Absence | 03 Sep 2026 | 00:25:41 | |
WHAT THIS EPISODE IS ABOUT ⏱️ EPISODE TIMESTAMPS 📋 TOP TIPS 📚 RESOURCES & REFERENCES 🎧 LISTENERS’ LOUNGE & RESOURCES 🔗 USEFUL LINKS & CONNECT Produced by Chantelle Venter at maddatu.com on behalf of The Resilient Kid. | |||
| S11E12 - Let's Actually Talk About Sex For 16+ | 18 Aug 2026 | 00:21:29 | |
Let's Actually Talk About Sex The Resilient Kid Podcast | Season 11, Episode 10 "Your body belongs to you. Your desire is not shameful. Healthy sex is mutual, communicative, and good for everyone involved."WHAT THIS EPISODE IS ABOUTThe final and most direct episode of Season 11. For young people aged 16+, we talk honestly about what sex is, healthy sex, pornography, contraception, STIs, readiness, consent and making choices that feel right for you. For parents: please listen before sharing with your teenager. It is explicit in places and intentionally so. ⚠️ LISTENER GUIDANCEFor young people aged 16 and over. Includes direct discussion of sex, pornography, contraception and STIs. If you are under 16, Episodes 7, 8 and 9 are made for you. ⏱️ TIMESTAMPS00:00 Age Guidance and Intent Healthy sex: both people genuinely want to be there, can stop at any time, communicate, and know that both people's pleasure and wellbeing matter. Pornography: a performance, not a guide to real bodies, consent, pleasure, intimacy or what is "normal". Contraception: condoms are the only contraceptive method that also helps protect against STIs. Other options include the pill, implant, coil, injection and emergency contraception. STIs: many have no obvious symptoms. Testing is free and confidential, condoms reduce risk, and most STIs can be treated. 🔬 RESEARCH & FURTHER READINGNatsal: https://www.natsal.ac.uk/ Brook: https://www.brook.org.uk/ NHS Contraception: https://www.nhs.uk/contraception/ NHS Sexual Health: https://www.nhs.uk/service-search/sexual-health/find-a-sexual-health-clinic SH:24: https://sh24.org.uk/ 📚 SUPPORTRape Crisis: 0808 500 2222 | https://rapecrisis.org.uk/ https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge USEFUL LINKSNewsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share Book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1739302605 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theresilientkid YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@theresilientkid957 Spotify: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/ashley-costello | |||
| S11E11 - Consent: What It Actually Means 13+ | 13 Aug 2026 | 00:22:39 | |
Consent, Pressure & Staying Safe Online “Consent is not the absence of a no. It is the presence of a yes.” This episode is for young people aged 13 and over. It talks honestly and directly about consent, relationships, pressure, online safety, intimate image sharing and sextortion. It is designed to help young people recognise what a genuine yes looks like, what pressure can sound like, what to do if something online starts to feel wrong, and where to get help. For parents: this is a good episode to listen to first, then share with your teenager or use as the starting point for a conversation. What consent means
Pressure can sound like: “If you really liked me, you would”, “Everyone else does it”, “You said you would” or “We’ve been together long enough.” Pressure is not consent. Online consent & sextortionSending an intimate image does not give anyone permission to share it. Sextortion is when someone uses an intimate image, or the threat of sharing one, to demand money, more images or something else. It is a crime and it is not your fault. If this happens: do not pay, do not send more images, do not delete the messages, tell a trusted adult immediately and report it. CEOP: https://ceop.police.uk/ If you were pressured, manipulated, someone did not stop when you wanted them to, or you are being threatened with an image, you do not have to deal with it alone. Tell a parent, teacher, trusted adult, coach or another safe person. You are allowed to ask for help. Rape Crisis England & Wales: https://rapecrisis.org.uk/ | 0808 500 2222 Find more resources here: Website: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk The Resilient Kid Podcast | Season 11 — The Parent in the Room | |||
| S11E10 - Hey, This Is For You: Girls | 06 Aug 2026 | 00:26:52 | |
This episode is spoken directly to girls aged 10–13 in language that treats them like the capable, curious, real people they are. It explores female puberty honestly and without embarrassment, covering breast development, body hair, vaginal discharge, periods in detail, the correct names for female anatomy including the vulva and clitoris, masturbation and self-exploration, emotional changes, body image, social media, consent and personal boundaries. It answers the questions many girls have but are often too afraid to ask, reassuring them that what they are experiencing is normal. For parents: listen first, then share. Listen together on a journey, or simply leave it quietly on a device. However it reaches her, it is worth getting there. This episode is designed to support the conversations you are already having at home, not replace them. Listener Guidance This episode is suitable for young people aged 10+. It contains age-appropriate discussion of puberty, periods, vaginal discharge, the vulva, vagina, clitoris, masturbation, emotions and body confidence. There is no explicit sexual content. Episode Timestamps 00:00 Welcome Quick Reference Puberty usually starts between the ages of 8 and 13. Breast buds, body hair, growth spurts, skin changes and vaginal discharge are all normal parts of development. Periods usually happen every 21–35 days, last 3–7 days and are often irregular when they first begin. Pads, tampons, period pants and menstrual cups are all valid options. Big feelings are normal too – your brain is still developing. Find More Resources 🎧 Listeners' Lounge Inside you'll find the research behind every episode, companion podcast episodes, downloadable resources, recommended books, handouts and practical tools to help you continue the conversation at home. Useful Links Newsletter A Parent's Guide to Raising a Resilient Kid Website YouTube Spotify Podcast Facebook Instagram LinkedIn Pinterest Teachers' Guide Waitlist The Resilient Kid Podcast | Season 11 – The Talk | |||
| S11E9 - Hey, This Is For You Boys - Age 10-13 | 30 Jul 2026 | 00:14:37 | |
"What is happening to you is normal. All of it."WHAT THIS EPISODE IS ABOUT This episode is for boys aged 10–13, spoken directly to them in honest, age-appropriate language. We talk about puberty, what is happening to the body, why it happens, and the things many boys are never warned about, including erections, wet dreams, masturbation, emotions, body changes and what to expect as they grow up. Parents are encouraged to listen first, listen together, or simply share the episode with their son. However you do it, the aim is to make these conversations easier. ⚠️ LISTENER GUIDANCESuitable for young people aged 10+. This episode includes age-appropriate discussion of puberty, erections, wet dreams and masturbation. It contains no explicit sexual content and is designed to support healthy, shame-free conversations. ⏱️ EPISODE TIMESTAMPS00:00 Welcome and age guidance
For young people:
For parents:
Keep conversations relaxed. Let your son know you're available for questions without putting pressure on him to talk immediately. You don't need to have all the answers—being open and willing to listen is what matters most. USEFUL LINKSWebsite: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk Newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share Book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1739302605 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theresilientkid YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@theresilientkid957 Spotify: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/ashley-costello The Resilient Kid Podcast | Season 11 – The Parent in the Room | |||
| S11E8 - Let's Talk About Sex — The Parent Guide | 22 Jul 2026 | 00:25:56 | |
```html“How do I give them something I never had?”WHAT THIS EPISODE IS ABOUT This is the episode many parents have been both waiting for and quietly dreading. We follow Gemma, mum to a sixteen-year-old son and a thirteen-year-old daughter, who received almost no meaningful sex education herself. She was taught the mechanics of reproduction, but not what sex feels like, what healthy sex looks like, or how desire, pleasure, consent, and communication fit together. This episode explores what sex actually is beyond penetration and reproduction. It looks at why pleasure matters, why leaving it out can cause harm, and how parents can begin honest conversations with their teenagers, even when nobody had those conversations with them. Contraception, STIs, and pornography will each be explored in separate follow-up episodes. ⏱️ EPISODE TIMESTAMPS00:00 Introduction Professor Kaye Wellings leads the National Survey of Sexual Attitudes and Lifestyles. The research recognises sexual activity as a broad spectrum, including kissing, touching, oral sex, mutual masturbation, and penetrative sex. A definition focused only on penetration can leave young people without the language to understand their own experiences. Pleasure MattersDr Emily Nagoski argues that sex education focused only on pregnancy, STIs, assault, and risk can teach young people that sex is fundamentally dangerous. Alongside safety and consent, young people need to understand that healthy sex is mutual, both people want to be there, both people’s pleasure matters, and either person can stop at any time. What Young People WantResearch from the Sex Education Forum shows that young people want honesty, clear answers, and information about what healthy relationships and sexual experiences look and feel like, not only what they should fear. 💡 FIVE TIPS FOR PARENTS
YouTube: Add link Spotify: Add link USEFUL LINKSA Parent’s Guide to Raising a Resilient Kid Instagram |Facebook |YouTube |Spotify ⚠️ A NOTE ON THE STORIESGemma and Tyler are composite characters, created from the experiences of many families who have asked the same question: How do I give them something I never had? The Resilient Kid Podcast | Season 11 | |||
| S11E7 - Teaching Consent From the Start | 16 Jul 2026 | 00:30:26 | |
"By the time we get to the teenage conversation, consent should already be a language a young person has been speaking for a decade." WHAT THIS EPISODE IS ABOUT Consent is not a teenage conversation. It begins in childhood, in the moment a child does not want a hug and a trusted adult says: "You don't have to." In this episode, we follow two families. Sarah and Daniel realise they have talked about bodies without discussing who those bodies belong to. Nadia's daughter, Chloe, comes home shaken after being pressured online and not having the language to explain why it felt wrong. We explore consent from toddlerhood through to the teenage years, including body autonomy, boundaries, online pressure, relationships and why children need practice saying no and having it respected. EPISODE TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Consent is not a teenage conversation CONSENT AT EVERY AGE Ages 2–5 Respect their no. Children do not have to hug, kiss or be tickled if they do not want to. "You don't have to give Grandma a hug. Would you like to wave instead?" Ages 5–10 Teach them that their body belongs to them, nobody should touch them in a way that feels uncomfortable, and they will never be in trouble for telling you. Ages 10–13 Name pressure clearly, including online pressure. Nobody has the right to ask for photos or make them feel they must prove something with their body. Ages 13+ Consent goes both ways. A yes must be clear, freely given and ongoing. Going quiet, changing the subject or appearing uncertain is not a yes. FIVE KEY TAKEAWAYS
RESEARCH AND SUPPORT This episode references work from the NSPCC, Professor Liz Kelly, Rape Crisis England and Wales, Dr Nina Burrowes, the Lucy Faithfull Foundation and statutory RSE guidance. All research links, safeguarding organisations, support numbers, further reading and downloadable resources are available in our Listeners' Lounge: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge A NOTE ON THE STORIES Sarah, Daniel, Nadia, Chloe, Poppy and Reuben are composite characters based on families we have supported. Their stories protect confidentiality while reflecting real experiences. If this episode has brought something up for you or your child, please visit the Listeners' Lounge for trusted support organisations. You do not have to carry it alone. The Resilient Kid Podcast | Season 11 — The Talk | |||
| S11E6 - The Woo Cycle | 09 Jul 2026 | 00:26:13 | |
"Make it sound easy." — James, age 8 WHAT THIS EPISODE IS ABOUTThis week Ashley is joined by special guests Malou, founder of Period Reality, and her eight-year-old daughter James, co-author of The Woo Cycle. Together they explore how simple, honest conversations can help children understand periods without fear or shame. James shares the beautiful metaphor that inspired the book: "The womb makes a bed for a baby, and if no baby comes, it changes the sheets." This warm, funny conversation reminds us that children often explain big ideas better than adults ever could. IN THIS EPISODE
The Woo Cycle is a beautifully illustrated book for children aged 4–8, helping families talk about periods in a calm, positive and child-friendly way. It follows Lena as she discovers why her mum is bleeding and learns that periods are simply part of the body's natural monthly cycle. The book has already been enjoyed by girls, boys, parents, dads, grandparents and educators, helping adults find language that feels natural and easy. FIND ALL THE EXTRA RESOURCESResearch, further reading, links to Period Reality, Maya Moore, previous podcast episodes and recommended books are all available in our Listeners' Lounge. https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge USEFUL LINKSNewsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share A Parent's Guide to Raising a Resilient Kid: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1739302605 Website: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk Email: ashley@theresilientkid.co.uk A NOTEThis episode celebrates the launch of The Woo Cycle. James and Malou appear as themselves and generously share their family's story, reminding us that honest conversations begin with simple words—and sometimes the best teachers are children themselves. The Resilient Kid Podcast | Season 11 – The Talk | |||
| S11E5 - Growing Up GIRL | 01 Jul 2026 | 00:26:05 | |
"She'll know. She'll just know."WHAT THIS EPISODE IS ABOUT This episode is for every parent raising a girl, especially those who were never given the full picture themselves. We follow Diane, a mum who grew up in a home where periods were called “being poorly”, and Rob, a dad who wants to be someone his daughter can talk to but worries he does not know enough. He does. And so do you. We cover female puberty, periods, body changes, correct anatomical language, body image, social media pressure, masturbation, self-exploration and why girls need trusted adults to speak clearly, calmly and without shame. ⏱️ EPISODE TIMESTAMPS00:00 Introduction — 1998 and the clitoris Female puberty usually begins between ages 8 and 13, although every girl develops in her own time. Common changes include breast buds, pubic and underarm hair, changes to the vulva and vagina, vaginal discharge, wider hips, growth spurts, oilier skin, body odour and periods. The timeline varies enormously. What matters is that girls know what to expect before it happens, so they do not feel frightened, ashamed or alone. 🔬 RESEARCH & CONCEPTS MENTIONEDDr Helen O’Connell’s 1998 research accurately mapped the clitoris and showed how much female anatomy had been missed or ignored in medical teaching. Dr Jennifer Gunter reminds us that using “vagina” for everything makes female anatomy vague. Correct words such as vulva, vagina, labia, clitoris and urethra matter. Dr Christiane Northrup’s work on body literacy shows that girls who understand their bodies are better equipped to care for themselves and seek help when needed. Debby Herbenick’s research highlights the shame many girls carry around self-exploration. The message should be simple: self-stimulation is normal, private and not harmful. Plan International UK, Girlguiding and Dr Linda Papadopoulos highlight the pressure girls face around body image, beauty standards and social media. Dr Sarah-Jayne Blakemore’s work on the adolescent brain helps explain why puberty can bring emotional intensity. Their brains are under construction. 💡 FIVE TIPS — QUICK RECAP
All research links, further reading, book suggestions and support resources are available inside our Listeners’ Lounge: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge 💬 JOIN THE CONVERSATIONDid this episode give you something you needed? Did it name something that has been sitting unnamed for a long time? We would love to hear from you. Email: ashley@theresilientkid.co.uk Newsletter Sign-up: A Parent’s Guide to Raising a Resilient Kid: Facebook: Instagram: LinkedIn: Website: Diane and Rob are composite characters, built from the many parents who have asked: how do I talk to my daughter about this? You are not alone. It is not too late to sit down at the kitchen table and tell her the truth. The Resilient Kid Podcast | Season 11 — The Talk | |||
| S11E4 - Growing Up BOYS | 25 Jun 2026 | 00:33:40 | |
"He is going to remember that you showed up." WHAT THIS EPISODE IS ABOUT This episode is a practical guide for parents who want to talk to boys about puberty, bodies and growing up, but are not sure where to begin. We follow two families: Mark, a dad who got through his own puberty in silence and wants something different for his son Theo; and Priya, a single mum raising her son Jude, wondering whether she is the right person to have this conversation at all. Spoiler: she is. And so are you. We talk about male puberty, physical changes, erections, wet dreams, masturbation, emotions, shame, and why trusted adults matter so much. The aim is not to make these conversations awkward. It is to make them possible. ⏱️ EPISODE TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Introduction — the question parents ask most 📋 PUBERTY IN BOYS — WHAT TO EXPECT Male puberty typically begins between the ages of 9 and 14, and that wide range is normal. Starting earlier or later than friends does not mean anything is wrong. Common changes include growth of the testicles and scrotum, pubic hair, penis growth, underarm and facial hair, voice changes, height spurts, muscle development, oilier skin, spots, stronger body odour, erections, ejaculation and wet dreams. The timeline varies enormously. What matters most is that boys are told what to expect before it happens, so they do not feel frightened, ashamed or alone. 🔬 RESEARCH & CONCEPTS MENTIONED PSHE Association guidance highlights the importance of normalising the wide range of puberty timing, so boys understand there is no single correct age to begin developing. Dr Andrew Smiler’s work on adolescent male development explains that spontaneous erections are a normal, involuntary part of puberty and are not always connected to sexual arousal. Wet dreams, also called nocturnal emissions, usually begin between ages 11 and 15. A short, calm conversation beforehand can prevent unnecessary fear or shame. Debby Herbenick’s research highlights that shame around masturbation can be carried into adult relationships. Boys need to know self-stimulation is normal, private and not harmful. NSPCC safeguarding guidance reminds us that correct anatomical language matters. Words like penis, testicles, scrotum, erection and ejaculation reduce shame and help children seek help clearly if something is wrong. The Internet Watch Foundation and Sex Education Forum both highlight the risks when young people get information mainly from online spaces or pornography rather than trusted adults. Pornography is not sex education. Dr Sarah-Jayne Blakemore’s work on the adolescent brain helps explain why puberty can bring emotional intensity. Boys are not simply being difficult; their brains are under construction. 💡 FIVE TIPS — QUICK RECAP
📚 FIND THE FULL RESOURCES All research links, further reading, book suggestions, puberty timelines and support resources are available inside our Listeners’ Lounge: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge USEFUL LINKS A Parent’s Guide to Raising a Resilient Kid: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1739302605 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/resilientkiduk Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theresilientkid LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/resilientkid Website: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk A NOTE ON THE STORIES Mark and Priya are composite characters, built from the many parents who have asked some version of the same question: how do I talk to my son about this? | |||
| S11E3 - The Talk We Never Had | 16 Jun 2026 | 00:28:26 | |
"The silence is never neutral. It always teaches something. The question is only what." WHAT THIS EPISODE IS ABOUT Welcome to Season 11 of The Resilient Kid Podcast — The Talk. This season is dedicated to the conversations many parents dread, but many children desperately need: puberty, periods, consent, bodies, relationships and sex. In this first episode, we look at why so many grown-ups avoid these conversations, what silence can teach children, and how we can begin gently, honestly and without shame. At The Resilient People — the organisation behind The Resilient Kid and The Resilient Teen — we see the gap every week. The gap between what young people need to know and what they are actually being told. In that gap, young people often fill in the blanks themselves through friends, social media, the internet and pornography. This episode is for parents, carers and educators who want to do it differently, but are not quite sure where to begin. EPISODE TIMESTAMPS00:00 Opening note and season introduction02:00 Why this season exists04:00 Pete’s story — part one09:00 Why silence is not neutral14:00 Five ways to start17:00 Pete’s story — part two21:00 The bigger picture23:00 What is coming this season24:30 Outro and resources RESEARCH & CONCEPTS MENTIONED Brook highlights that many young people use the internet as a key source of information about sex and relationships, often before they have had meaningful conversations with trusted adults. The Sex Education Forum has found that young people often feel underprepared for the realities of relationships and sex, and want more honest, relevant conversations. Ofsted’s 2021 review of sexual abuse in schools and colleges found that sexual harassment and abuse had become normalised for many young people, with some no longer reporting incidents because they felt so common. Dr John Bancroft’s work reminds us that shame around bodies and sexuality is not something children are born with. It is often learned through silence, discomfort and avoidance. The NSPCC Talk PANTS campaign shows why children need correct language for their bodies and permission to speak openly. Language is a safeguarding tool. The Internet Watch Foundation and PSHE Association both reinforce the importance of ongoing, age-appropriate conversations with trusted adults. 💡 FIVE WAYS TO START
📚 FIND THE FULL RESOURCES All research links, further reading and support resources mentioned in this episode are available inside our Listeners’ Lounge - https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge 💬 JOIN THE CONVERSATION Did this episode resonate with you? Are you a parent who has been putting off The Talk, or someone who has already started and wants to share what helped? We would love to hear from you.📧 Email: ashley@theresilientkid.co.uk📸 Instagram: @theresilientkid💻 Website: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk Use the hashtag #TheTalkWeNeverHad and share your story. A NOTE ON THE STORY Pete is a composite character, built from the many parents and carers who have sat across from us over the years and said some version of: I want to do this differently, but I don’t know how. If you see yourself in Pete, that is entirely intentional. You are not alone, and it is never too late to open the door. USEFUL LINKS Newsletter Sign-up: Instagram: LinkedIn: Website: | |||
| S11E2 - The Words I Never Had | 08 Jun 2026 | 00:23:15 | |
I Don't Even Know What I'm Feeling Half the Time. How Am I Supposed to Help Him Know What He's Feeling? When you were a child — when you were scared, sad, overwhelmed or angry — what happened? Not what should have happened. What actually happened. For some people, someone came. Someone sat with them, helped them make sense of what they were feeling and showed them that emotions could be understood and managed. For many others, feelings were ignored, redirected or met with discomfort. Not because they weren't loved, but because the adults around them had never been given the words either. And then they became parents. Parents who desperately wanted to do things differently, but often found themselves facing a child in distress and wondering what to say. In this episode of The Resilient Kid Podcast, Ashley explores what happens when emotional language isn't passed down through generations, why some children struggle to identify and express what they are feeling, and how emotional literacy can be learned at any age. If you've ever thought, "I don't even know what I'm feeling half the time. How am I supposed to help my child?" this episode is for you. In This Episode
Timestamps
Five Key Takeaways
Research Highlights This episode explores the work of Daniel Siegel, Mary Hartzell, John Gottman, Allan Schore, Joseph Ciarrochi and Mark Wolynn, looking at emotional literacy, alexithymia, neuroplasticity, emotion coaching and intergenerational patterns. Practical Resource Mentioned The Feelings Wheel A simple visual tool that helps children and adults identify and name emotions. Search online for a free printable version and consider putting one on the fridge for the whole family to use. Important Note David and Marcus are fictionalised composite characters created to protect client confidentiality while reflecting the realities many families experience. Find the Full Show Notes For the complete research references, recommended books, additional resources, links and extended notes, visit the Listeners' Lounge: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge If This Episode Resonated We would love to hear from you. Please consider:
Useful Links Listeners' Lounge: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Newsletter Sign-up: A Parent's Guide to Raising a Resilient Kid: Facebook: Instagram: LinkedIn: YouTube Channel: Website: #TheResilientKid | |||
| S11E1 - The Anxiety I Didn't Know I Was Giving You | 01 Jun 2026 | 00:30:15 | |
I Think This Is Me. I Think I Gave This To Them. When your child is anxious — when the stomach aches appear on Monday mornings, when worries multiply overnight, when the school gate becomes a battleground — where do you look for the reason? Most of us look outward. School. Friends. Social media. The state of the world. But sometimes, and I say this with every ounce of compassion, anxiety can be closer to home than that. In this episode of The Resilient Kid Podcast, Ashley explores how anxiety can move through families without a word being spoken. Not through blame, but through co-regulation, modelling, and the emotional atmosphere children grow up in. If you have ever thought, "I think this is me. I think I gave this to them," this episode is for you. In This Episode
Timestamps
Five Key Takeaways
Research Highlights This episode explores the work of Allan Schore, Stephen Porges, Lynne Murray, Daniel Siegel, Mary Hartzell and Mark Wolynn, looking at co-regulation, attachment, parental anxiety and intergenerational patterns. Important Note Claire and Ellie are fictionalised composite characters created to protect client confidentiality while reflecting the realities many families experience. Find the Full Show Notes For the complete research references, recommended books, additional resources, links and extended notes, visit the Listeners' Lounge: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge If This Episode Resonated We would love to hear from you. Please consider:
Useful Links Listeners' Lounge: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/loungeNewsletter Sign-up:https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/shareA Parent's Guide to Raising a Resilient Kid:https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1739302605Facebook: Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/theresilientkidLinkedIn: Pinterest:https://za.pinterest.com/resilientacademyYouTube: Spotify Podcast:https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/ashley-costelloWebsite: Teachers' Guide Waitlist:ashley@theresilientkid.co.uk #TheResilientKid | |||
| Building Wellbeing Communities for Kids & Families | 27 May 2026 | 00:48:51 | |
Ashley is joined by Neil Lewis (The Empathy Coach) and Becky Percival (Rebecca Percival Coaching), the co-founders of the Warrington Wellbeing Festival, for a conversation about community wellbeing, future-proofing our children, and creating spaces where families feel supported. Now in its fourth year, the festival has grown into a thriving community event, and this year The Resilient Kid team will be running both the Kids Tent and Teen Tent. In This Episode We Cover
📅 Date: Saturday, 11th July 2025 Tickets: £15 pre-booked | £20 on the day
Tip from Neil and Becky: Check the programme before you arrive — with so much on offer, planning helps. Follow the Warrington Wellbeing Festival📱 Instagram & Facebook: @WarringtonWellbeingFestival 🌐 Website: Warrington Wellbeing Festival Mentioned in This Episode
“Resilience doesn’t build in isolation. It grows in community.” — Ashley A Note from AshleyThis episode genuinely moved me. What Neil and Becky have built isn’t just a festival — it’s a movement. We are so proud to be part of the Warrington Wellbeing Festival this year. Come and find us in the Kids Tent and Teen Tent. Timestamps00:00 Welcome and Guests Has this episode brought something up for you? We would love to hear from you. YouTube Link: Spotify Link: #TheResilientKid If This Episode Resonated
https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Useful Links
| |||
| S10E10 - The Moment They Let Me In | 20 May 2026 | 00:31:45 | |
"Trust is not given. It is earned. Slowly, quietly, in the accumulation of ordinary moments." In all the years I’ve been doing this work — sitting with young people and their families, walking into schools, being in the rooms where the real conversations happen — one thing comes up more than any technique, model or framework. People heal when they feel safe enough to be honest. And they feel safe enough to be honest when someone has shown them, consistently and over time, that they are not going anywhere. This episode is about trust — what it actually takes to build it with a young person who has every reason not to give it. It is about Mia, a fifteen-year-old who had already been through four services in three years before she came to us. A school counsellor who left. A CAMHS referral that ended in discharge. A voluntary worker who lost funding. A social worker who changed three times in eighteen months. Four services. Three years. Not one consistent face. What that teaches a young person is not just that support disappears. It teaches them that trusting adults is dangerous. This episode explores what happened when we stopped trying to break through the wall and instead sat alongside it. IN THIS EPISODE
KEY THEMES
FIVE WAYS TO BUILD TRUST
THE BIG MESSAGE Every young person who finally lets us in is doing something incredibly brave. Trust is not built in one dramatic moment. It is built slowly through consistency, honesty, repair and presence. Sometimes the walk with the hot chocolate looks like nothing. But it is everything. FIND ALL THE RESEARCH, RESOURCES & FURTHER READING IN OUR LISTENER’S LOUNGE https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge IF THIS EPISODE RESONATED Please consider sharing it with a teacher, therapist, parent, youth worker or anyone supporting young people who have learned not to trust. And if you found it helpful, leaving a review helps more families and professionals find the show. A NOTE ON THE STORY Mia is a fictionalised composite created to protect confidentiality while honouring the truth of the work. She represents many young people who have experienced breaks in support and learned to protect themselves accordingly. USEFUL LINKS
| |||
| S10E9 - The Science of Small Things | 12 May 2026 | 00:25:34 | |
"The small things are not the consolation prize when the big things aren't available. The small things are the thing." It's Mental Health Week, and this episode is not going to tell you to do more. It is not going to give you a seventeen-step programme or add to the already very long list of things you feel like you should be doing and aren't quite managing. Because the science does not point to more as the answer. It points to the breakfast table. The school gate hello. The named feeling. The repair after the hard moment. The predictable ritual before bed. It points to the small, repeated, ordinary interactions between a child and a trusted adult — the things so many parents, teachers and carers are already doing without realising they count. WHAT THIS EPISODE IS ABOUT One in six children in England aged five to sixteen meets the criteria for a probable mental health condition, and CAMHS waiting lists in many areas continue to stretch far beyond what families need. In response, we often search for bigger solutions: more programmes, more training, more resources, more interventions. And while all of those things can have value, the research has been quietly pointing to something else for decades. The most powerful protective factors for children's mental health are often not clinical, expensive or complicated. They are the everyday moments of safety, warmth, consistency and connection. In this Mental Health Week special, I explore the science behind why those small things matter so much — and why parents and educators may already be doing far more than they know. IN THIS EPISODE
THE FIVE SMALL THINGS
FOR TEACHERS Your small things matter too.
Sometimes, “Looks like today is a tough one. I’ve got you,” is enough. THE BIG MESSAGE The small things are not a backup plan when the big things are unavailable. The small things are the thing. The breakfast table matters. The school gate matters. The named feeling matters. The repair matters. The twenty-second hug matters. Every ordinary, unremarkable, quietly revolutionary bit of it matters. LISTEN AND FIND THE RESOURCES You can find the full research references, further reading and supporting resources inside the Listener’s Lounge: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge IF THIS EPISODE RESONATED Please share it with a parent, teacher, colleague or anyone working with young people who needs reminding that what they are already doing matters. And if you found it useful, a review means the world. It helps more families and educators find the show. USEFUL LINKS
| |||
| S10E8 - Someone Finally Stayed | 07 May 2026 | 00:24:23 | |
"No one's ever actually said that to me before." People heal when they feel safe enough to be honest. And they feel safe enough to be honest when someone has shown them — consistently, over time — that they are not going anywhere. At The Resilient Kid, everything we do comes back to two things: meeting young people where they are, and wrapping around them 360 degrees. Because a young person doesn’t exist in isolation. They exist in a family, in a school, and in a community. Today, I want to tell you what that looks like in practice. This is Ryan’s story. WHAT THIS EPISODE IS ABOUT Ryan was fourteen when he came to us. Hood up, arms folded, absolutely certain this wasn’t going to work. His dad had left when he was seven — not with a dramatic moment, just a slow fade — and for seven years Ryan had been quietly carrying one question: what did I do wrong? His mum was loving, exhausted, and stuck in a cycle she hadn’t chosen. His school described him as fine. And fine, in our experience, is one of the most worrying words there is. This episode is about what happened when we met Ryan where he was, wrapped around his whole world — therapy room, family home, school corridor — and stayed. It’s about why healing never happens in isolation. It happens in relationship. KEY IDEAS IN THIS EPISODE
THE 360 WRAP IN PRACTICE In Ryan’s story, the work wasn’t just happening in one session a week. It was happening through conversations with Mum, check-ins with school, and shared understanding between the adults around him. When the same language is spoken at home, in school, and in the therapy room, a young person begins to feel held. They begin to believe the adults around them are working together — and that they are not alone. A NOTE ON THE STORY Ryan is a fictionalised composite, created to protect client confidentiality while honouring the truth of the work. He is not one specific young person — but he represents many real ones. Every detail has been changed. The emotional truth has not. TIME STAMPS 00:00 — Intro: The heart of The Resilient Kid02:00 — Ryan’s Story, Part One07:00 — Why the relationship is the intervention12:00 — The 360 Wrap in practice15:00 — Ryan’s Story, Part Two19:00 — Youth mental health and the gap22:00 — For parents, teachers, and young people24:00 — Outro FIND THE RESOURCES IN OUR LISTENERS’ LOUNGE You can find more information, links, research, and resources inside our Listeners’ Lounge: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge JOIN THE CONVERSATION Did this episode resonate? Are you a parent in the cycle, a teacher with a Ryan in your class, or someone who was once that young person carrying something too heavy alone? Share your thoughts using #TheResilientKid #SomeoneFinallyStayed IF THIS EPISODE MOVED YOU Please consider leaving a review, sharing the episode with a parent, teacher, or professional, or passing it on to anyone working with young people who needs to be reminded that the relationship is the intervention. USEFUL LINKS If you'd like to know more about how we work with young people, families, and schools together — or if you have a young person in your life who needs support — we'd love to hear from you.
| |||
| S10E7 - The Place I Finally Fit | 30 Apr 2026 | 00:26:28 | |
"You made this place look like somewhere worth being." Can I ask you something personal? When did you first feel like you truly belonged somewhere? Not tolerated. Not managed. Not just allowed to exist in the room. But wanted. Expected. Like the space would feel different if you weren’t there. For some of you, that feeling came early — a family dinner table, a school team, a bedroom that felt like the whole world. But for many, it didn’t. And when it did arrive, it often came from somewhere unexpected. Not a system. Not a programme. A person. One adult who decided — without being asked, without it being written into a job description, without any guarantee it would work — that this child was worth showing up for. This episode is about those people. The youth workers. The support workers. The ones sitting in community centres, church halls, and temporary spaces — who quietly change the direction of young lives. WHAT THIS EPISODE IS ABOUT Kezia is thirteen. She has been to four schools in five years. She eats lunch in the library. She draws entire cities in the margins of her notebooks — detailed worlds she has been building quietly for two years — and she has never shown anyone. Then one Thursday afternoon, she ends up at a youth centre she doesn’t want to be in. A youth worker called Marcus asks her one question about her drawing. A question no one has ever asked before. This is the story of what happens next. And why one consistent, caring adult — in an underfunded room with a broken table tennis table — can change the trajectory of a child’s life. This episode is for anyone who has ever felt like they didn’t quite fit anywhere. And for every youth worker, support worker, and community professional who shows up anyway — week after week — even when no one seems to be watching. KEY IDEAS Belonging uncertainty For children who’ve experienced instability or rejection, there’s often a quiet question running in the background: “Do I belong here?” That question takes up space, making it harder to connect and engage. Even small moments of genuine recognition can begin to settle that uncertainty. Fitting in vs belonging Fitting in is becoming who you think you need to be to be accepted. Belonging is being accepted as you are. The power of one stable adult For children experiencing instability, the most protective factor isn’t a programme — it’s one consistent adult who shows up. The youth work gap Youth services have been reduced, yet their impact remains profound. When young people lose access, they don’t just lose activities — they lose relationships, safety, and belonging. FIVE WAYS TO CREATE BELONGING Start with their interests, not their history Reward presence, not disclosure Be consistent Let them contribute Say it out loud: “This place is better when you’re here.” LISTENERS LOUNGE For all research, references, and deeper reading: 👉 https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge USEFUL LINKS Sign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share Get A Parent’s Guide To Raising A Resilient Kid: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1739302605 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/resilientkiduk Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theresilientkid LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/resilientkid Pinterest: https://za.pinterest.com/resilientacademy YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@theresilientkid957 Spotify: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/ashley-costello Website: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk Teacher guide waitlist: ashley@theresilientkid.co.uk A NOTE ON THE STORY Kezia and Marcus are composite characters, built from real experiences and stories shared by young people and youth workers. If you see yourself in Kezia, that’s intentional. You were never too much. You just needed someone to notice your city. | |||
| The Teacher Who Saw Me | 24 Apr 2026 | 00:18:20 | |
What This Episode Is About Have you ever had a teacher who truly saw you — not your grades, not your reputation, not your behaviour record, but you? In this episode, we tell the story of Jamie — a child labelled, managed, and quietly written off — and the teacher who refused to go along with the script. Ms. Okafor didn't have a magic wand. She had something more powerful: curiosity, consistency, and the decision to make deposits when everyone else had been withdrawing. Along the way, we dig into the real science behind why one relationship can change the entire trajectory of a child's life — and we give you five practical tools to start building that kind of connection today. Whether you're a teacher, a parent, a youth worker, or someone who was once a Jamie yourself — this one's for you. Time Stamps: 00:00 Remember That Teacher Find all the resources in our Listeners Lounge: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Useful Links
| |||
| S10E5 - The One that Believed First | 10 Apr 2026 | 00:32:16 | |
This season, we’re exploring one powerful question: Who made a difference in your life?In this heartfelt episode, Ashley sits down with Sarah Hughes, co-organiser of Womanifest, mum of four, and business owner, to explore the impact of one person who changed everything for her. From self-doubt and feeling stuck… to building a business, stepping into leadership, and helping run a transformational festival for women and teen girls—Sarah shares the story of how one person’s belief helped her begin to believe in herself. This conversation is a powerful reminder that it’s not always the big moments that shape us…
It doesn’t take perfection or having all the answers to change someone’s life. Sometimes it’s simply:
Sara is a mum of four, business owner, and co-organiser of Womanifest—a powerful festival designed to inspire, educate, and empower women and teen girls. She also runs the Teen Tent at Womanifest, creating a safe, inspiring space where young people can explore confidence, identity, relationships, and emotional wellbeing. Join Us at WomanifestAshley and The Resilient Kid team will be hosting the Teen Tent at Womanifest—a space dedicated to supporting teen girls with:
Come and experience it for yourself As you listen, you might find yourself thinking about your person… Or maybe realising something even more powerful: You might be that person for someone else.And that’s where change begins. One moment. 00:00 One Person Who Changed You https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Youtube Link: Spotify Link: Sara Hughes
| |||
| The One Where I Felt Seen | 27 Mar 2026 | 00:37:08 | |
This month on The Resilient Kid Podcast, we’re exploring a powerful theme: one person who made a difference in your life. In this episode, Ashley is joined by friend of the show, Sarah Vogel, for a thoughtful and heartfelt conversation about the person who changed the direction of Sarah’s life — a colleague and dear friend, Dr Elaine Swan. What started as one simple comment in a London department store in the late 1980s became the first domino in a chain of events that shaped Sarah’s future. From seeing herself differently, to going to university as a mature student, to building a life and career that has impacted so many others, Sarah reflects on the incredible ripple effect of being truly seen by someone. In this episode, we cover:
About Sarah Vogel Sarah Vogel is a coach, facilitator, mediator, and leadership expert who helps people and organisations have better, braver, and more effective conversations. Through her work with PDA, she supports leaders to build confidence, influence, accountability, and stronger relationships at work. Sarah is also passionate about helping young people develop confidence, communication skills, and resilience early in life — so they can step into the world feeling more grounded, capable, and connected. A note for parents and professionals This episode is a reminder that you may never fully know the impact you are having on a child or young person. A conversation. It all matters. And often, the things that feel small to us are the very things they remember for years to come. Connect and share If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone who has made a difference in your life — or with someone who may need the reminder that their presence matters more than they know. And as you listen, maybe ask yourself: Who was that one person for you? Teen Event Mention Teen tickets are now on sale for Womanifest, where Ashley and Sarah will be hosting dedicated teen sessions focused on confidence, body positivity, resilience, relationships, and emotional wellbeing. - https://www.skiddle.com/whats-on/Crewe/Delamere-Events-Ltd/Womanifest-2026/41123458/ It will be a space for teens to feel supported, inspired, and equipped with tools they can take into everyday life. We are building a community of people who want to be that person for more children, in more places. So if something in this episode has resonated with you, and you have ever felt that pull to make a difference not only in your own family but in your wider community too, that is exactly why we created our franchise - https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/franchise Links Website: www.contactpda.com Sign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share Get “A Parent’s Guide To Raising A Resilient Kid”: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1739302605 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/resilientkiduk Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theresilientkid LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/resilientkid YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@theresilientkid957 Spotify: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/ashley-costello | |||
| The Mother's Day Edition | 19 Mar 2026 | 00:14:32 | |
Mother’s Day can look like breakfast in bed, family roasts, and a full, noisy house… But for many, it’s also a day that brings mixed emotions — grief, distance, complicated relationships, or quiet reflection. In this episode, I share a personal story about my mum — not for the everyday things we often associate with motherhood, but for something deeper. Her courage. At just 22, she emigrated to South Africa on a one-way ticket, building a life from scratch. But when her marriage broke down, she made a decision that would shape everything that came after… She came home. As a single mum. And it got me thinking… It only takes one person.One person to make a different choice.
This is a gentle, honest episode — whether you’re celebrating, grieving, or somewhere in between. A gentle reminderIf Mother’s Day feels hard for you, you’re not alone. Your experience is valid — whether it’s shaped by loss, distance, or a relationship that isn’t what you hoped it would be. And if today brings gratitude, love, and connection — hold onto that too. There’s space for all of it. Want to be that one person for more children?If this episode resonated with you and you feel called to support children in building confidence, emotional resilience, and stronger futures… You can find out more about becoming part of The Resilient Kid community here: 👉 https://www.theresilientkid.co.uk/franchise Our franchise opportunity is designed for people who want to make a real difference — working with children, families, and schools to create lasting change. Because it really does only take one person… to change everything. 📩 Stay connected
00:00 Mothers Day Morning https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Youtube Link: Spotify Link: Useful Links
| |||
| The One Who Found Her Voice | 12 Mar 2026 | 00:31:34 | |
With Ruby O’Brien In this episode of The Resilient Kid Podcast, Ashley speaks with an inspiring young leader, Ruby O'Brien and winner of the Womanifest Future Voice Award. Ruby perfectly represents the heart of this podcast series, Only Takes One Person — because behind her journey is a youth worker who asked two powerful words that changed everything: “Why not?” As a young carer growing up in Knowsley, Ruby carried significant responsibility at home and struggled to trust people after a difficult experience in her family. But when a youth worker named Jack encouraged her to step into a youth group and later apply for Youth Parliament, Ruby began to realise something powerful: Her voice mattered. Today, Ruby has spent two years representing young people in her role as Youth MP, including speaking in the House of Commons and championing issues that matter to young people, including mental health, education, and community empowerment. In this conversation, Ruby shares how one person believing in her helped her find the confidence to step forward — and how she now hopes to be that person for other young people. She also talks about her latest campaign to raise £20,000 for an accessible lift at the Epstein Theatre in Liverpool, after witnessing wheelchair users unable to access the stage at a youth event. For Ruby, the message is simple: Accessibility is a right, not an option. This episode is a powerful reminder that when young people feel heard, supported, and believed in, incredible things can happen. And sometimes… it only takes one person. In this episode
“If you’ve got a dream, go for it. If you fail, that’s not failure — it means you tried.” A reflection for listenersWho was the person who believed in you? The teacher, youth worker, coach, parent, or mentor who saw something in you before you saw it yourself. Because resilience isn’t built alone. And sometimes… it only takes one person. Time Stamps:00:00 One Person Matters https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Youtube Link: https://youtu.be/Mfoof6Spxck Spotify Link: Ruby's Links
| |||
| The One Who Advocated | 05 Mar 2026 | 00:16:10 | |
We often hear the phrase “It takes a village to raise a child.” And while community matters, research consistently shows something powerful: the single greatest protective factor in a child’s life is one stable, supportive adult. One person who believes in them. This episode launches a brand-new series on The Resilient Kid Podcast called Only Takes One Person. Fresh off the stage after winning the Heart of the Community Award, Ashley reflects on the power of advocacy, connection, and the ripple effect one person can have on a life. In this opening episode, Ashley shares a deeply personal story about her Auntie Vera (Vee) — the woman who stepped in and advocated for her when she was just 21 years old. After finishing her psychology degree, Ashley had applied for a counselling course, only to be told she was too young to be accepted. While Ashley was travelling in South America, her Auntie Vee received the call from the course professor. Rather than accepting the decision quietly, Vee stood up for her niece. She explained the experiences Ashley had already navigated in life — growing up in a multi-generational family, supporting grandparents, and witnessing her father’s mental health struggles — and why those experiences had shaped her desire to help others. That moment of advocacy changed everything. Ashley became the youngest person ever accepted onto the course, beginning a journey that has now spanned 30 years of supporting children, families and schools. But this episode isn’t just about one phone call. It’s about the profound impact one person can have on a young life. Whether that person is a parent, teacher, mentor, coach or relative — a single relationship can change a child’s sense of safety, belief, and possibility. Through The Resilient Kid programme, Ashley and her team hope to be that person for many of the children and families they support. Because sometimes, the biggest changes begin with the smallest moments of belief. In this episode, we explore:
A reflection for listeners
Coming up next In the next episode of the series, Ashley will be joined by a special guest who will share the story of their one person and the impact that relationship had on their life. Time Stamps: 00:00 One Person Matters Find all the resources in our Listeners Lounge: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Useful Links
| |||
| Dads Club with Rob Garner | 25 Feb 2026 | 00:36:39 | |
The Power of Dads, Community & Connection What does it really mean to be a dad in 2026? In this powerful and heartfelt episode, I’m joined by Rob, founder of Davenham Dads Club and Macclesfield Dads Club, to talk about modern fatherhood, male mental health, and why community matters more than ever. This isn’t about criticising schools, families, or men. It’s about recognising the quiet pressure many fathers carry — and why safe spaces to talk are no longer optional. They’re essential. Drawing from lived experience, community work, and honest conversation, we explore what resilience really looks like for dads — and why confident, regulated adults raise confident, regulated children. In this episode, we explore:
Key Takeaway: Resilience isn’t built in isolation. And sometimes it starts with two hours, once a month. Who This Episode Is For:
If This Episode Resonated Please consider sharing this episode. Your shares help these conversations reach the dads who may never ask for help — but deeply need it. 🎧 Share this episode with someone who quietly carries more than they show. Spotify – Listen here YouTube – Watch here Time Stamps: 00:00 What does it mean to be a dad in 2026? Find all the resources in our Listeners Lounge: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Rob’s Links Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61586925473953 Useful Links Sign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share | |||
| The Gap Between Education and Emotional Wellbeing | 19 Feb 2026 | 00:20:38 | |
As my youngest turns 16 and prepares for his final year of school, I found myself reflecting on a bigger question: Are we building systems that nurture who young people are becoming — or are we asking them to constantly adapt to pressure? In this episode, I explore the growing gap between academic performance structures and emotional wellbeing support in education. This isn’t about criticising schools — far from it. Schools are not failing. They are stretched. Drawing from our CPD work, Resilient Schools training, and research into teen brain development, I unpack:
In this episode, we cover:
Practical takeaways: We don’t need to dismantle the education system. Resilience isn’t a “nice to have.” Key reminder: You are not burning out because you are weak. You are burning out because you care deeply inside a system that rarely slows down. The goal is not to care less. The goal is to protect yourself while you care. Who This Episode Is For:
Resources & Support If this episode resonated with you:
Because young people don’t just need standards. Time Stamps: 00:00 Education vs Emotional Wellbeing: The Growing Gap Find all the resources in our Listeners Lounge https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Useful Links Sign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share | |||
| The Hidden Emotional Labour of School Staff (And Why It’s Breaking You) | 12 Feb 2026 | 00:19:25 | |
The Hidden Emotional Labour of School Staff (And Why It’s Breaking You)🎙️ The Hidden Emotional Labour of School Staff (And Why It’s Breaking You) Teachers and school staff are walking out of buildings every day completely exhausted — not because the day was dramatic, but because it was relentless. In this episode, Ashley explores the hidden emotional labour inside schools — the constant co-regulation, emotional containment, and nervous system management that rarely gets acknowledged but leaves staff mentally and physically depleted. If you’re a teacher, TA, SENCO, pastoral lead, or school-based professional who goes home emotionally drained and unable to switch off, this episode explains why — and what you can do about it. In this episode, we cover:
Supporting children with behaviour, trauma, and regulation needs requires calm tone, steady presence, and emotional containment. Staff regulate multiple nervous systems before reaching their own. Without space to reset, this creates nervous system overload. This isn’t about resilience. It’s sustained emotional output without protection. Practical takeaways:
You are not burning out because you are weak. You are burning out because you care deeply in a system that rarely slows down. The goal isn’t to care less — it’s to protect yourself while you care. Who This Episode Is For:
If you’d like support with emotional regulation, nervous system tools, or CPD for your school, explore Ashley’s work at The Resilient Kid, including workshops, training, and the Resilient Kid Programme. Visit: https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk If This Episode HelpedPlease consider sharing it with a teacher, TA, or school professional who may need to hear they’re not failing — they’re carrying a lot. 🎧 Share this episode with someone who walks out of school exhausted but still deeply cares. Spotify – YouTube – Time Stamps:00:00 Introduction and Apologies https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Useful LinksSign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share | |||
| Why are so many nursery children not ready for school and what actually helps? | 28 Jan 2026 | 00:32:04 | |
More children are starting school without the skills they need to feel confident, settled, and ready to learn — and it’s not because parents don’t care. In this episode, Ashley explores why so many nursery-aged children are being described as “not school ready,” what professionals across early years and education are seeing, and how small, everyday changes at home can make a big difference. With warmth, honesty, and practical guidance, this episode covers speech and language development, independence, toileting, screen use, and the simple skills that truly prepare children for school — without panic, blame, or unrealistic expectations. In this episode, we cover:
Practical takeaways:
Key reminder: School readiness isn’t about academic ability — it’s about communication, connection, independence, and confidence. Small, consistent changes at home can make a powerful difference in helping children feel safe, capable, and ready for the transition to school. Who This Episode Is For:
Resources & Support If you’d like more support around emotional regulation, confidence, and helping children feel ready for big transitions, explore Ashley’s work at The Resilient Kid, including workshops, resources, and the Resilient Kid Programme for families and schools. Resources & Support If you need support, you can reach out via social media or email ashley@theresilientkid.co.uk. We have an Anxiety Workshop coming up in February for £25, which includes a 60-minute session and a 30-minute Q&A. Sign up here - https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/parent-workshop Time Stamps: 00:00 Introduction: The School Readiness Crisis 01:31 Understanding School Readiness 02:05 Communication and Emotional Regulation 02:29 The Role of Independence and Social Skills 03:06 Challenges in School Readiness 03:33 Impact of Screen Time on Development 06:16 Practical Tips for Reducing Screen Time 07:29 Building Independence in Daily Routines 10:23 Toilet Training: Overcoming the Challenges 16:33 Enhancing Speech and Language Skills 27:26 Final Thoughts and Encouragement 31:00 Conclusion and Resources Find all the resources in our Listeners Lounge https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Useful Links Sign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share | |||
| Low Mood in Kids: What Helps and What Doesn’t | 21 Jan 2026 | 00:22:33 | |
Low mood in children often shows up in ways that are easy to misinterpret — especially in January. In this Blue Monday week episode, Ashley explores what low mood can look like in children, what’s happening in the brain, and how parents and teachers can respond in ways that support recovery rather than add pressure. This episode is for anyone supporting children at home or in school. In this episode, we cover:
Practical takeaways:
Key reminder: Low mood is information — not failure. 🎧 Share this episode with a teacher or parent supporting a child who feels “not quite themselves” right now. Spotify – YouTube – Time Stamps: 00:00 Introduction to Low Mood in Kids and Teens 00:30 Understanding January Blues 02:14 Recognising Low Mood Symptoms 03:35 Brain Science Behind Low Mood 07:14 Why January Exacerbates Low Mood 09:03 Effective Strategies for Parents and Educators 16:59 What Not to Do: Common Mistakes 19:03 When to Seek Help 20:20 Conclusion and Final Thoughts Find all the resources in our Listeners Lounge https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Useful Links Sign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share | |||
| Resilient Mornings & Calmer Bedtimes After the Holidays | 14 Jan 2026 | 00:30:07 | |
Mornings and bedtimes often take the biggest hit after the holidays — and this episode explains why. Ashley breaks down what’s happening in children’s brains during transitions, why routines fall apart before they improve, and how parents and carers can support calmer starts and smoother evenings without constant battles. This is a practical, reassuring episode for families who are feeling stretched at the bookends of the day. In this episode, we cover:
Practical takeaways:
Key reminder: You don’t need perfect mornings or peaceful bedtimes. 🎧 This episode is especially helpful after school holidays or periods of change. Link to buy weighted blankets Ashley spoke about – Kids weight: Weighted Blanket - Kids Teen & Adult Weight: Weighted Blanket - Teens Time Stamps: 00:00 Introduction: Why Mornings and Bedtimes Go Off the Rails 00:29 Understanding the January Struggle 02:11 The Brain After the Holidays: Why Transitions Are Hard 04:31 Why Mornings Are So Hard 07:25 Building Resilient Mornings: Practical Tips 17:35 Why Bedtimes Fall Apart After the Holidays 19:25 Creating Calmer Bedtimes: Practical Tips 26:21 Final Thoughts and Encouragement for Parents Find all the resources in our Listeners Lounge https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Useful Links Sign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share | |||
| Why January Feels Harder Than It Should | 07 Jan 2026 | 00:22:35 | |
January is often sold as a “fresh start”, but for many families it feels anything but. Using child development and brain science, this episode reframes January as a nervous-system recovery period, not a time for pressure or perfection. In this episode, we cover:
Practical takeaways:
Key reminder: January isn’t a failure. 🎧 Share this episode with a parent who feels like they’re “behind” this month — they’re not. Time Stamps: 00:00 Introduction and New Year Greetings 00:51 Why January Feels Harder 02:00 The Myth of the Fresh Start 03:57 Brain Development and January Struggles 07:13 Why January Is Harder for Teens 11:02 Behavioural Changes and Communication 13:40 Supporting Kids and Teens in January 19:37 Conclusion and Final Thoughts Find all the resources in our Listeners Lounge https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Useful Links Sign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share | |||
| Staying Grounded | 20 Oct 2025 | 00:37:26 | |
How do we cultivate motivation at any age? In this episode of the Resilient Kid Podcast, Ashley Costello explores how to foster motivation in children, teens, and adults. She dives into what drives motivation, including intrinsic and extrinsic factors, and offers strategies to create environments that inspire curiosity, play, identity, and belonging. Special attention is given to supporting neurodivergent minds and the role of community in keeping motivation alive. You’ll leave with practical tips to encourage purposeful action across all stages of life. You’ll Hear
00:00 – Introduction and Podcast Overview https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Useful LinksSign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share We’re building a space where parents, teachers, and coaches can support each other and share tools to help kids thrive. Visit our Facebook group or reach out if you’d like to get involved in creating stronger, motivated communities for children, teens, and adults alike. | |||
| Beating Procrastination | 13 Oct 2025 | 00:25:28 | |
Why do we put things off, even when we want to get them done? In this episode of the Resilient Kid Podcast, Ashley Costello unpacks procrastination—what drives it, what’s really happening in the brain, and how to move from avoidance to action. You’ll learn why procrastination isn’t laziness but emotional resistance, and get practical tools to help kids, teens, and adults push past it with purpose and progress. You’ll Hear
00:00 – Why Procrastination Isn’t Laziness https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Useful LinksSign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share We’re building a space where parents, teachers, and coaches can support each other and share tools to help kids thrive. Visit our Facebook group or drop us a message if you’d like to get involved in reaching more children. | |||
| Motivation - What Really Drives Kids/Teens and Adults | 02 Oct 2025 | 00:20:39 | |
What really drives us? In this episode of the Resilient Kid Podcast, Ashley Costello kicks off a mini-series on motivation. She explains what fuels motivation, what blocks it, and how kids, teens, and adults can build more of it in daily life. From brain science to practical tools, you’ll learn how motivation really works and how to support it at home, in school, and at work. You’ll Hear
00:00 – What Drives Us and Why Motivation Matters https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Useful LinksSign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share We’re building a space where parents, teachers, and coaches can support each other and share tools to help kids thrive. Visit our Facebook group or drop us a message if you’d like to get involved in reaching more children. | |||
| Spotting the Early Signs of Burnout in Kids and Teens | 19 Sep 2025 | 00:24:10 | |
Burnout isn’t just for adults. Kids and teens feel it too. In this episode of the Resilient Kid Podcast, Ashley Costello explores how to spot early warning signs of burnout, why it happens, and what parents and teachers can do to help children reset and build resilience. You’ll Hear
00:00 – Spotting Early Signs of Burnout in Kids and Teens https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Useful LinksSign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share We’re building a space where parents, teachers, and coaches can support each other and share tools to help kids thrive. Visit our Facebook group or drop us a message if you’d like to get involved in reaching more children. | |||
| Friendships, Confidence, and Belonging | 10 Sep 2025 | 00:25:07 | |
Friendships play a huge role in your child’s confidence, happiness, and learning. In this episode of the Back to School mini podcast series, we explore how friendships change as children grow, the pressures of online life, and how you can support your child to feel connected and resilient. You’ll Hear
00:00 – Introduction to the Podcast Series https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Useful LinksSign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share We’ve partnered with Rachel to create a range of supportive and fun items for kids and parents. Expect weighted blankets with affirmations, hoodies with fidget ties, mugs with bold logos, and more. To join the priority list for early access, email us at hq@theresilientkid.co.uk or ashley@theresilientkid.co.uk. | |||
| Practical Back to School Hacks: Routines That Work | 04 Sep 2025 | 00:23:18 | |
The school year is here in full swing—and with it, the return of chaotic mornings, rushed evenings, and tired kids. But it doesn’t have to feel so stressful. In this episode of The Resilient Kid Podcast, we talk about simple, practical routines that help your home feel calmer while giving your kids and teens the predictability they need to thrive. You’ll hear:
You’ll also get updates on The Resilient Kid’s teacher training, exciting new merch, and where to find us at the upcoming Peace Festival. Find all the resources in our Listeners Loungehttps://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Timestamps00:00 – Back to school vibes: the return of routine Sign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share | |||
| Back to School Emotions: Settling the Wobbles - whatever the age! | 29 Aug 2025 | 00:32:38 | |
The back-to-school season brings big emotions—not just for kids, but for parents too. In this episode of The Resilient Kid Podcast, we dive into how families can manage the wobbles that come with new teachers, timetable changes, friendships, and transitions to high school, college, or university. You’ll hear:
The message: every child’s path looks different, and that’s okay. Whether your child is starting primary school, navigating the shift to high school, or preparing for university, you’ll leave with practical ways to support them—and yourself—through the transition. Find all the resources in our Listeners Loungehttps://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Timestamps00:00 – Introduction to Back-to-School Emotions Sign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share | |||
| The Lesson We Forgot to Teach: Living in Sync with Our Bodies | 06 Aug 2025 | 00:39:05 | |
Embracing Our Cyclical Nature: Importance of Cycle Tracking and Systemic Change Ashley interviews Marlou, founder of Period Reality, to discuss the concept of humans as cyclical beings. They explore the idea that we're not designed for the linear 'grind' and instead should live in harmony with our natural cycles. Marlou elaborates on how societal systems, particularly education and workplaces, could be adapted to better accommodate these natural rhythms. T he conversation also delves into practical steps for individuals to track their cycles and the potential benefits of such awareness. The episode underscores the importance of systemic change and individual awareness for improved well-being and productivity. Find all the resources in our Listeners Loungehttps://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Timestamps00:00 Introduction to the Resilient Kid Podcast https://www.facebook.com/PeriodReality Sign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share | |||
| Let’s Talk About Sex: Consent, Sex & Staying Safe at Uni | 30 Jul 2025 | 00:24:54 | |
Navigating Consent, Sex, and Safety at University Ashley Costello, a psychotherapist and founder of The Resilient Kid, discusses the importance of understanding consent, safe sex, and personal boundaries for young adults transitioning to university. She addresses the challenges posed by new freedoms, social media, and substance use, and underscores the crucial need for open communication and education on these topics to ensure students' emotional and physical well-being. Find all the resources in our Listeners Lounge https://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Timestamps 00:00 Introduction to Consent and Safety Useful Links Sign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share | |||
| From Taxi Driver to Text Message | 23 Jul 2025 | 00:20:51 | |
Join psychotherapist Ashley Costello on the Resilient Kid Podcast as she discusses how to support your kids transitioning to university without smothering them. Covering the emotional challenges parents face, Ashley provides practical advice on maintaining connections, recognizing when to step in, and empowering young adults to manage their new responsibilities. With tips on creative communication and helping during stressful times, this episode aims to help parents and their children navigate this significant life change. Find all the resources in our Listeners Loungehttps://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Timestamps00:00 Introduction: Supporting Your Kids at University Sign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share | |||
| Beans on Toast Won’t Cut It | 16 Jul 2025 | 00:29:11 | |
Essential Life Skills for University-Bound Teens In this episode of The Resilient Kid Podcast, Ashley Costello discusses the essential life skills that 18-year-olds need before leaving for university. The episode covers fundamental areas such as cooking, laundry, cleaning, financial confidence, and healthcare. Ashley provides practical advice on how to equip teens with the resourcefulness and confidence to handle these aspects of independent living, ensuring they can thrive and remain safe while away from home. The episode emphasizes the importance of preparation and ongoing conversations between parents and their soon-to-be university students. Find all the resources in our Listeners Loungehttps://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Timestamps00:00 Introduction: Preparing for University Life Sign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share | |||
| Off to Uni -The Emotional Rollercoaster of kids leaving home | 10 Jul 2025 | 00:25:40 | |
This episode dives into the emotional turmoil parents face when their teens prepare to leave for university. It addresses the mixed emotions involved for both parents and children, tips on emotional preparation, and the importance of maintaining open communication. The host also highlights the significance of teaching coping mechanisms and offers practical advice to manage this significant transition period. Find all the resources in our Listeners Loungehttps://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/lounge Timestamps00:00 Introduction: The Emotional Whirlwind of Letting Go Sign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share | |||
| Teaching Money Skills: Empowering the Next Generation | 02 Jul 2025 | 00:38:54 | |
Ashley discusses the importance of teaching children and teens about money with Leslie Thomas, the founder of the Money Confidence Academy. Leslie emphasizes the lack of financial education in schools and highlights her mission to improve financial literacy and mindset for young people Find all the resources in our Listeners Loungehttps://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/loungeTimestamps 00:00 Introduction: Talking to Kids About Money Academy - https://www.themoneyconfidenceacademy.com Sign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share | |||
| Navigating Boundaries - Part 2 | 26 Jun 2025 | 00:24:58 | |
We explore the various types of boundary violations that children may face and the importance of teaching them how to recognize and uphold these boundaries. Covering aspects such as physical, emotional, intellectual, and social media boundaries, we discuss strategies to help children manage their emotions, build empathy, and develop healthier relationships. Our goal is to future-proof kids by raising emotionally intelligent and resilient young adults. Find all the resources in our Listeners Loungehttps://www.theresilientacademy.co.uk/loungeTimestamps 00:00 Introduction to Boundaries Sign up to our newsletter: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/240667/93026367927485942/share | |||