Explore every episode of the podcast No Visible Bruises
| Title | Pub. Date | Duration | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Only Talking Does Not Heal Trauma & Narcissistic Abuse | 27 Aug 2024 | 00:16:02 | |
Join the waitlist for my Narcissistic Trauma Informed Coaching Certification: https://carolinestrawson.com/ntic-waitlist
Order my NEW book here: https://carolinestrawson.showit.site/book
In this episode, I explore the importance of addressing trauma and narcissistic abuse not just through traditional talk therapy, but also through somatic and nervous system-based approaches. I am passionate about advocating for a "top-down and bottom-up" approach that combines cognitive processing with healing the body and nervous system.
I share my own journey of discovering these somatic modalities and my frustration at being dismissed by the mainstream mental health system for not having a psychology degree, despite my extensive training and success in helping people heal. I am on a mission to bring more awareness to the need for integrating somatic practices into trauma and abuse recovery.
In this episode, we will explore:
Resources:
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| Reactive Abuse By The Narcissist To Make You Look Crazy | 20 Aug 2024 | 00:13:50 | |
Order my NEW book here: https://carolinestrawson.showit.site/book
In this episode, I explore the concept of reactive abuse - how narcissists can provoke their partners to react in ways that make the partner appear to be the abuser, when in fact they are the victim of the narcissist's manipulation.
I also discuss the feeling of not recognising oneself due to the changes in behaviour brought about by being in a relationship with a narcissist. I explain the dynamics of reactive abuse and provide guidance on how to navigate this challenging situation safely.
In this episode, we will explore:
Resources:
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| The Addiction to The Narcissist & Toxic Relationships | 18 Jun 2024 | 00:09:24 | |
Join my FREE Trauma Bonding Masterclass, 8pm BST Sunday 30th June: https://carolinestrawson.com/trauma-bond Even if you can’t attend live, sign up to be sent a copy of the recording after it concludes.
Do you find yourself constantly attracting toxic and narcissistic individuals, unable to break free from the cycle? You’re not alone. This isn't just a coincidence—it’s an addiction. But rest assured, there is hope and a brighter future awaits you.
Reflecting on my own experience, I remember the dark days spent in a toxic and narcissistic relationship with my ex-husband. Each day, I felt more worthless, often finding my only solace in the comfort of baggy tracksuits. I was paralysed, unable to muster the energy or desire to do anything at all.
In this episode, we will explore:
This cycle of despair is rooted in a phenomenon known as trauma bonding. Trauma bonding is more than just an emotional connection; it’s a physiological addiction that takes hold within our bodies, always hoping for a lasting change that never comes. Understanding this can be the first step towards breaking free and reclaiming your life.
Podcast Resources:
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| Narcissistic Relationships, Trauma & Polyvagal Theory | 20 Sep 2022 | 00:20:28 | |
Do you ever wonder why you react in the way you do and wish that you had a positive response instead of what always seems to be a negative response? If so, tune in, as in this episode I’ll break down Polyvagal Theory and how it teaches us how and why our responses are often automatic. By knowing how our nervous system controls our responses, we can start to point ourselves in the direction of growth by integrating a recovery programme that can change how we feel for the better. What you will learn in this episode:
I’ll also discuss how you can use the traffic light system to define where you are in your trauma recovery. At the end of the day, I want you to know how you can turn your pain into your purpose, and by learning more about your nervous system, you’ll be able to create a recovery plan to influence how your nervous system can help you for the better. If you want to learn about these topics on a much greater scale, you can check out my Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme here: https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse Resources:
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| Survivor Stories: Sarada Rao | 13 Sep 2022 | 00:43:06 | |
In this Survivor Stories episode, you’ll meet Sarada Rao, a Narcissistic Abuse Survivor and one of my students in my Accredited Narcissistic Trauma Informed Coaching Certification who is driven to help women from the South Asian Community. We’ll discover how Sarada is turning her pain and struggle into her purpose and strength to help women from the South East Asian community to recognise narcissistic abuse and recover from it. What you will learn in this episode:
Sarada discusses how she discovered what narcissism is after a childhood of narcissistic abuse from her parents which led to an arranged marriage with a narcissist. Then throughout the episode, we’ll see where Sarada is now, so that women, especially those from the South East Asian community, can see what the light at the end of the tunnel can look like in terms of recovery from narcissistic abuse. Connect with Sarada:
Resources:
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| Ask Me Anything: September ‘22 | 06 Sep 2022 | 00:23:22 | |
Today’s episode is this month's "Ask Me Anything" where I get to answer the questions you’ve been sending in! In this episode, I discuss topics ranging from why you may be struggling to find the energy to exercise because of a trauma response, to the number #1 thing that you can do to get back into dating. I’ll also discuss how to stop your children from developing narcissistic behaviours when they spend time with your narcissistic ex-partner and if a narcissist can actually be cured. Questions in this episode include:
My aim for these episodes is to make sure I’m discussing topics that directly impact you, so I hope my answers help you in a strong recovery from narcissistic abuse. Every first Tuesday of each month is an "Ask Me Anything" episode, so please send in your questions to hello@carolinestrawson.com where we will endeavour to answer them either in these Ask Me Anything episodes or as a topic for a full episode! Resources:
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| What a Narcissist Looks for in a Partner | 30 Aug 2022 | 00:17:13 | |
Have you left a narcissist and want to get back into dating, but are now scared you may fall into a relationship with another narcissist? If so, this episode is for you. Dating can be hard for anyone, but it’s particularly difficult, and even traumatic, for those of us who have been in a narcissistic relationship. In this episode, I’ll help you rediscover your confidence to start dating again by showing you what a narcissist looks for in a partner, so you can avoid those “attractive to a narcissist” behaviours. What you will learn in this episode:
I’ll also discuss how there are many types of narcissists, from covert to overt, grandiose to vulnerable, as it’s important to recognise what type of narcissists are out there to improve your chances of avoiding them. I hope that with the information in this episode, you can move from post-traumatic stress to post-traumatic growth and find yourself in a happy and functional relationship going forward. Resources:
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| 5 Signs of Love Bombing From A Narcissist | 23 Aug 2022 | 00:16:24 | |
Have you been in a narcissistic relationship and are now scared to jump back into the dating scene for fears of ending up with another narcissist? If so, this episode is for you. By getting back into dating, we further our path to recovery, so it’s important to prepare ourselves for dating and to avoid falling into a narcissist's trap. One of the ways to avoid narcissists is to understand how they use love bombing to entice you into a relationship. What you will learn in this episode:
We must remember that there is a light at the end of the tunnel! There is hope. We may date some more narcissists along the way, but I hope with the information in this episode you can avoid them and end up growing into a great relationship. Resources:
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| Survivor Stories: Enmeshment To Empowerment From A Narcissistic Mother | 16 Aug 2022 | 00:30:36 | |
In today’s episode, I hear Aneela Mehkri’s story of how she knew that something was always wrong with her mum, but she didn’t know it was Narcissism until she was 30. We’ll learn how a household of dysfunction, arguments, and fights led to Aneela discovering what narcissism is and how it impacted her life emotionally, mentally, and physically. What you will learn in this episode:
Aneela discusses how her mother and the culture in Pakistan caused her to have insecurity growing up by teaching her to not discuss what was happening inside her household with other families and friends. We’ll then learn how Aneela got on the pathway to recovery from her mother's narcissism and the wounds it caused, and how she is now helping others heal from narcissistic abuse with her work as a Humanistic Integrative Therapist. Connect with Aneela: Resources:
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| Body Shaming & Narcissistic Abuse | 09 Aug 2022 | 00:23:27 | |
Have you ever said to yourself “I feel so stupid… I’m so fat… I’m so ugly?” If so, you’re not alone. I used to say those words to myself all the time, I felt disgusted at myself and I definitely didn’t want to look at my body in the mirror. This was all happening whilst I was married to my narcissistic ex-husband, he had deeply impacted my sense of self and my physical appearance is what I honed in on. What you will learn in this episode:
Body shaming can be a huge part of narcissistic abuse, because we’ll blame ourselves for what’s happening and take it out on ourself. My hope for this episode is that I can put you on the right track to love yourself and feel comfortable in your own body in the process of healing from narcissistic abuse. Here is the link to book your FREE call with one of my Narcissistic Abuse Ambassadors to get your very own Personalised Healing Map with the steps to start your healing journey with where you are right now: https://go.carolinestrawson.com/personalised-healing-map-call Resources:
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| Ask Me Anything: August ‘22 | 02 Aug 2022 | 00:49:00 | |
Today’s episode is this month's "Ask Me Anything" where I get to answer the questions you’ve been sending in! In this episode, I discuss topics ranging from why people struggle to leave abusive relationships to why your sex drive is low after dating a narcissist. I’ll also do a deep dive on how we become addicted to the chemicals inside our brain and why we may stay in an abusive relationship to seek out those feel-good chemicals. Questions in this episode include:
My aim for these episodes is to make sure I’m discussing topics that directly impact you, so I hope my answers help you in a strong recovery from narcissistic abuse. Every first Tuesday of each month is an "Ask Me Anything" episode, so please send in your questions to hello@carolinestrawson.com where we will endeavour to answer them either in these Ask Me Anything episodes or as a topic for a full episode! Resources:
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| Anger At The Cheating Narcissist | 26 Jul 2022 | 00:20:23 | |
Anger is one of the biggest emotions I see directed at the narcissist, and sometimes even more at the other woman or man that your narcissistic partner has cheated with. In this episode, I will discuss what happens inside our body and brain when anger is building up and why it’s important to know how to deal with this emotion so that we can start to heal from our past traumas. What you will learn in this episode:
Anger certainly showed its face when I was dealing with my narcissistic ex-husband, and thankfully I was able to direct the emotions I was feeling to help me through the healing process. It’s important that we know how to direct these emotions. I hope this episode and discussion around anger will help you along your healing journey, as what builds inside of us as an emotion can eventually lead to real physical illnesses. Resources:
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| Survivor Stories with Devena Simon | 19 Jul 2022 | 01:06:20 | |
In today’s episode, I hear Devena Simon’s story of how she navigated her healing journey from being in a relationship with a narcissist. In this new series, I will be having conversations with people who have survived narcissistic abuse. My hope is that I can bring you examples of what happens within narcissistic relationships so that you can know how to react and survive if you happen to experience the same things. What you will learn in this episode:
Devena describes how her high school sweetheart turned into her narcissist. We’ll discover the warning signs that she wished she had seen when she first met her boyfriend, and she’ll share how she has managed to live a better life by healing from her narcissistic trauma. Devena hopes that her experience with a narcissist can help you avoid the same pitfalls, whilst mending bridges and rebuilding your life.
Connect with Devena:
Resources:
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| Sound Sensitivity, Trauma & Narcissistic Abuse | 11 Jun 2024 | 00:16:14 | |
Join the waitlist for my Safe and Sound Protocol program: https://carolinestrawson.com/ssp-waitlist
Do you ever find yourself unable to enjoy the music you once loved or find that your ears are particularly sensitive to loud noises?
You're not alone. This can be a common experience for those who have endured significant stress or trauma. In my case, I experienced this first-hand during my marriage to my ex-husband, who was a covert narcissist.
Over time, I developed a heightened sensitivity to sound. If someone dropped something near me, I wouldn't just startle like most people; I would jump out of my skin. This extreme response is a common consequence of narcissistic abuse and trauma.
In this episode, we will explore:
Podcast Resources:
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| The Mother Wound of Narcissistic Abuse with Brooke Bownes | 12 Jul 2022 | 00:32:15 | |
In today's episode, I am interviewing Brooke Bownes who is a Trauma-Informed Therapist and Coach, specialising in helping women heal their mother wounds associated with narcissistic abuse, she is also a valued member of my Embodied SELF Leadership Mastermind. I have no first-hand experience with a narcissistic parent, so I thought this would be a great opportunity to have Brooke on the show to discuss her experiences with her narcissistic mother. What you will learn in this episode:
Brooke was so kind to share her story about her narcissistic mother, from how she was treated as a child to the moment she realised that her mother was actually a narcissist. Brooke discusses how she managed to get on the path of healing herself to avoid passing on any narcissistic traits to her own children. I hope that these conversations will help you on your healing journey and perhaps they’ll make you see why people behave in the way they do. Guest Resources:
UK link: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B09DX7PB11 US link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09DX7PB11 Resources:
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| Ask Me Anything: July ‘22 | 05 Jul 2022 | 00:28:51 | |
Today’s episode is this month's "Ask Me Anything" where I get to answer the questions you’ve been sending in! I’ve received so many questions from you since our first “AMA” last month and I’m so happy that we can engage in this way. In this episode, I discuss topics ranging from why people don’t believe your story about a narcissist to how to deal with a trauma bond. I’ve tried to pick the questions that I believe will relate to the majority of you. Questions in this episode include:
My aim for these episodes is to make sure I’m discussing topics that directly impact you, so I hope my answers help you in a strong recovery from narcissistic abuse. Every first Tuesday of each month is an "Ask Me Anything" episode, so please send in your questions to hello@carolinestrawson.com where we will endeavor to answer them either in these Ask Me Anything episodes or as a topic for a full episode! Resources:
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| Promiscuity and the Narcissist | 28 Jun 2022 | 00:21:04 | |
Our mind and body can act in unusual ways after leaving a narcissist, and it’s vital to know why we may be showing behaviours that didn’t appear before. One of those behaviours can be extreme promiscuity, and that’s what I want to discuss in today’s episode of The Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Podcast. What you will learn in this episode:
Promiscuity after leaving a narcissist can occur because it’s our protector part of our nervous system trying to tackle our trauma head-on. Our inner wounds of not feeling good enough & feeling responsible for the relationship with the narcissist causes trauma which can lead to issues with our promiscuity. So in this episode, I discuss why our promiscuity can suddenly appear and the real meaning of it. Feel free to send me a message via my socials or through hello@carolinestrawson.com so we can discuss why promiscuity may be showing up for you. Resources:
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| 5 Ways To Ignore The Narcissists Fantasies On Special Occasions | 21 Jun 2022 | 00:30:10 | |
With it being fathers day this past weekend, I wanted to share some top tips on how you can cope through special occasions, such as birthdays, Christmas, and family events when there’s a narcissist involved. On big occasions, narcissists will often guilt trip you to connect with them, and you may even feel like you should give them another chance. It’s important to not fall into their trap, so in this episode, I’ll give you five ways to ignore the narcissist on special occasions. What you will learn in this episode:
These special events can be a great opportunity to take back your power, to show the narcissist that you will not be drawn back to them and that they won’t get their narcissistic supply from you. So use the methods I discuss to expand the gap between you and the narcissist and to make it incredibly difficult or impossible for them to reconnect with you. Resources:
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| The Narcissistic Abuse Cycle Explained | 14 Jun 2022 | 00:24:07 | |
A narcissist will always need their narcissistic supply, and as they look for their next hit, the narcissistic abuse cycle will continue. In this episode, I will discuss what the narcissistic abuse cycle is and how we may find ourselves in it. From love bombing, to gaslighting, to straight-up abuse, the narcissistic abuse cycle can be incredibly damaging, so my hope with this episode is that you can identify what stage of the cycle you’re in and how to get out of it. What you will learn in this episode:
I discuss how I fell into the narcissistic abuse cycle and why I ended up with a narcissist based on my childhood experiences. I hope that my experience can help you understand why you may be going through the narcissistic abuse cycle. It’s also important to know that the narcissistic abuse cycle isn’t always a downwards trajectory where each stage is worse than the last. Sometimes the narcissist will love bomb again to get what they need. This is why it’s called a cycle. Resources:
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| 100th Episode Celebration: Ask Me Anything | 07 Jun 2022 | 00:48:37 | |
It is time to celebrate YOU! We have hit over 2 million downloads now and appreciate each and every one of you. Today's episode is also the 100th episode, so it is a DOUBLE CELEBRATION, and today is all about "Ask Me Anything" where many of you have been sending in questions and these get answered. For this episode, I’ve tried to pick the questions that I believe will relate to the majority of you. Questions in this episode include:
These questions and more are all answered in this extended episode. Every first Tuesday of each month will now be an "Ask Me Anything" episode, so please send in your questions to hello@carolinestrawson.com where we will endeavour to answer them either in these Ask Me Anything episodes or as a topic for a full episode! Resources:
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| The Fawn Trauma Response To A Narcissist | 31 May 2022 | 00:23:35 | |
Fight, flight and freeze are common trauma responses, but there’s a fourth called Fawn which is often experienced when dealing with a narcissist. These trauma responses are controlled by your nervous system and are typically out of your control, you will respond in the present based on what you have experienced in the past. So, in this episode, I discuss the science behind trauma responses and why this often uncontrollable reaction is designed to keep you safe. What you will learn in this episode:
I break down how each trauma response works and how they impact your behaviour, from short term reactions to long term behaviour changes. If you’re listening to this episode close to its release date, I would love to hear what questions you would like to hear me answer! In episode 100, I will be answering your questions! So, feel free to email me at hello@carolinestrawson.com with your questions and I’ll hopefully be able to answer them in my next episode. Resources:
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| Sex, Porn & the Narcissist | 24 May 2022 | 00:21:42 | |
There is a correlation between the consumption of pornography, watching sex, and engaging in sex with narcissistic personality types. So, in this episode, I discuss how these habits can impact a relationship and what you can do to ensure you don’t become manipulated by a narcissist's desires. What you will learn in this episode:
I explore how porn addiction can lead to a narcissist gaslighting you, why you may be forced to loosen your boundaries because of your involuntary survival responses, and how porn soothes a narcissist's inner wounds. I hope this episode helps you realise what your narcissistic partner is doing so that you can plan toward a healthy exit strategy. Resources:
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| The Telltale Signs of a Covert Narcissist | 17 May 2022 | 00:23:47 | |
Covert narcissists are quite often the most dangerous, so it’s imperative that you know how to spot one. So, in this episode, I will share the telltale signs of a covert narcissist, from how they act in public compared to in private, to the passive-aggressive behaviours that they’ll show. What you will learn in this episode:
Covert narcissists will act as the nicest person possible when in front of your friends and family, so that when you go to them for help, your family and friends will not believe you as you’ll be explaining a completely different person to what they’re used to. So, the first thing you need to know is that I believe you and that you also need to believe yourself, as finding a support structure is so important to getting the ball rolling on dealing with a covert narcissist. Resources:
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| 6 Ways A Narcissist Creates Reactive Abuse | 10 May 2022 | 00:21:09 | |
Narcissists will attempt to put the blame on you for a fractured relationship by causing you to lash out, this is called Reactive Abuse and whilst there is so much in the public domain at the moment with court cases like Johnny Depp V Amber Heard (the only winners here are the lawyers), it is an ideal opportunity to learn and educate ourselves about the devastating effects. What you will learn in this episode:
In this episode, I will discuss the tactics narcissists use to perpetrate reactive abuse, and how to deal with a situation where reactive abuse is happening. Narcissists will often use your lashing out to blame YOU for the problems in the relationship, so I hope this episode will help you understand that your lashing out is not your fault. Resources:
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| Why is talking about Narcissistic Abuse frowned upon in society? | 04 Jun 2024 | 00:18:29 | |
Pre-order my new book here: http://carolinestrawson.com/pre-order
Narcissism is a topic I’m really passionate about because I believe it’s widely misunderstood. The term "narcissistic" is often overused in our society, with many people being labelled as narcissists without truly exhibiting those traits.
Misusing the word "narcissistic" diminishes the experiences of those who have genuinely suffered from narcissistic abuse, invalidating their trauma and making it harder for them to be heard and understood.
In this episode, we will explore:
Podcast Resources:
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| Being An Empath, A Codependent & In A Fawn Trauma Response Explained | 03 May 2022 | 00:17:12 | |
I was scrolling on Instagram when I discovered a post about empaths and found that the comments were extremely judgemental, saying that empaths do not exist. So, in this episode, I discuss what an empath is and share the scientific evidence that proves empaths are real. As well as discussing empaths, I discuss what being a codependent is and I also share what the fourth trauma response is. What you will learn in this episode:
After discussing empaths, I dive into what a codependent is, why childhood trauma can turn you into a codependent, and how you can become a recovered codependent, then I’ll share that there is a fourth trauma response state. You have fight, flight and freeze, as well as the fawn response, so I’ll explore what this response is and why narcissitic abuse can lead to having this response. Resources:
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| 5 Ways To Recognise You're Living With A Narcissist | 26 Apr 2022 | 00:19:44 | |
Do you have an inkling that you may be living with a narcissist? It could be your partner, a housemate or even a member of your family. Your suspicion may be correct, so in this episode, I’m going to share 5 ways to recognise if you’re living with a narcissist. What you will learn in this episode:
It’s so important to know that you’re living with a narcissist, because once you know who it is you’re living with, you’ll have a better chance of being able to deal with them. I’ll discuss common narcissistic behaviours, from how they interact with different people to the emotions they show. Reach out to me through support@carolinestrawson.com or message me on Facebook & Instagram so that we can bring you into our community to help you deal with what you are going through. Resources:
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| Chronic Pain & Narcissistic Abuse | 19 Apr 2022 | 00:20:50 | |
It is estimated that over 20% of a country's population is suffering from chronic pain, and often the root cause of the pain is unknown. However, for those suffering from emotional trauma, such as being in an abusive relationship with a narcissist, chronic pain can be a symptom of that emotional trauma. What you will learn in this episode:
In this episode, I’m going to discuss how our body deals with narcissistic abuse and why your emotional pain can often manifest itself as physical pain. The knowledge of how your brain, nervous system and body react to emotional trauma can be the key to being able to solve chronic pain, so I hope this episode can help you understand why you may be feeling the way you do. Resources:
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| Your Inner Critic & Narcissistic Abuse | 12 Apr 2022 | 00:16:13 | |
Your inner critic can often become overwhelming and we will perceive it to be having a negative impact on us. However, if we redefine what the inner critic is, we can start to learn what it is really there for and how to use it to identify and overcome our inner wounds. What you will learn in this episode:
In this episode I will discuss how to deal with your inner critic by identifying and overcoming your inner wounds as well as why we have an inner critic, because you aren’t a critical person, there’s a part of you that is designed to be critical to be able to help you overcome your past. Resources:
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| Trauma Bonding & Addiction To The Narcissist | 05 Apr 2022 | 00:13:11 | |
Join my FREE Masterclass on "The 4 Stages Of Trauma Bonding With A Narcissist" - Register here and you will be sent a recording if you can't make it LIVE https://go.carolinestrawson.com/nticc-masterclass-organic - I want you to understand why you feel the way you do with a narcissist, and I hope this episode and my FREE Masterclass this Thursday (April 7th, 2022) will help shine a light on your feelings and how to break a trauma bond and cure your addiction to a narcissist. What you will learn in this episode:
Becoming addicted to a narcissist and the hormones you get from being in a relationship is not your fault. Your body is designed to react in certain ways to protect you, but you must know how this biology works so that you can end your narcissistic addiction safely. Resources:
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| The 2 Things That Will Hurt The Narcissist the Most | 29 Mar 2022 | 00:22:16 | |
Narcissists love to have everything go their way, so when they don’t have that control, they can start to be negatively impacted. A narcissist not having control can open up a way for you to exit your relationship with them. In this episode, I will share the story of how my relationship with a narcissist came to an end and how I learned what a narcissist reacts to negatively.
What you will learn in this episode:
I hope this episode helps you mold your relationship with a narcissist to a point where you can leave the relationship so that you can begin to transform and heal yourself. Narcissists will always be hurt by the two things I will share with you in this episode, so listen carefully.
Resources:
DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS PODCAST, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE PODCAST AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT
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| 5 Types of Financial Abuse By A Narcissist | 22 Mar 2022 | 00:19:05 | |
There are many facets of narcissistic abuse, and one of the most controlling forms of abuse is financial & economic abuse. In this episode, I will share my experience of dealing with financial abuse and how you can avoid falling into this situation and also find resources and places to go to if you are currently dealing with financial abuse.
What you will learn in this episode:
Financial abuse is one of the most potent ways a narcissist can control you, so learning how to avoid it or get out of it is pivotal in finding a life of freedom. I hope that my story and the knowledge of the 5 main types of financial abuse will help you in your situation.
Resources:
DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS PODCAST, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE PODCAST AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT
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| The 7 Signs to Help You Spot a Covert Narcissist | 15 Mar 2022 | 00:17:52 | |
The overt narcissist we see, but the covert narcissist is much more subtle and a lot harder to recognize, so in this episode, I am going to walk you through the common warning signs to look for if you have a feeling you may be dealing with a narcissist.
What you will learn in this episode:
Spotting a covert narcissist is so important, because the person you meet in public who comes across as friendly can be an entirely different person behind closed doors. So I hope this episode helps you avoid dealing with a narcissist in the future, and also helps those of you who are currently dealing with a covert narcissist.
Resources:
DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS PODCAST, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE PODCAST AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT | |||
| 7 Things A Narcissist Will Never Do | 08 Mar 2022 | 00:18:45 | |
There are things a narcissist will absolutely never do, and you need to know what they are so you don’t sit around waiting for an apology or for their behavior to change. So in this episode, I’m going to discuss the 7 things a narcissist will never do and how you can spot these behaviors.
What You Will Learn In This Episode:
I know there are people out there who are waiting for their partner to apologize (I was one of them once), so I hope this episode will shine a light on why a narcissist will NEVER show real positive behaviors and empathy that could lead them to apologizing.
Resources:
DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS PODCAST, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE PODCAST AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT
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| Case Analysis Vladimir Putin - Golden Child To Malignant Narcissist?? | 01 Mar 2022 | 00:25:36 | |
Is Vladimir Putin a malignant narcissist? In this episode, I discuss how people become narcissists and how Putin’s childhood developed him into the man he is today. My heart goes out to the people of Ukraine and I wish nothing but the best for the country during this troubling time.
What You Will Learn In This Episode:
Being the golden child in his family led Putin to seek a sense of worth from people at every stage of his life. I hope that what we can learn from Vladimir Putin’s personality helps us to better understand people with a narcissistic personality.
Resources:
DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS PODCAST, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE PODCAST AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT | |||
| How to Parent with a Narcissist | 28 May 2024 | 00:17:37 | |
Join my FREE parenting masterclass: https://carolinestrawson.com/parenting-masterclass
Parenting and narcissism are two words that should not be in any sentence. This abuse is not something you should have to deal with whilst trying to raise a family.
In this episode, we'll delve into:
When I split up from my ex my children were 3 and 6 years old, and it was tough. Had I not split up from my ex husband, I would’ve still been codependent and feeling a lack of self-worth, which would have rubbed off on my children.
Now my kids are the kindest, most compassionate and self-confident young adults. They know that they are good enough for who they are and nobody else’s behaviour is ever a reflection of them. I am so incredibly fortunate to have them, and an important part of them becoming such brilliant young adults was my own healing journey.
Podcast Resources:
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| Intimacy Avoidance In A Narcissistic Relationship - You are NOT Frigid! | 22 Feb 2022 | 00:16:56 | |
It’s so common to avoid intimacy once you discover that you are in a relationship with a narcissist, and no, it isn’t because you are frigid! In this episode, I will discuss how our nervous system reacts to intimacy with a narcissist and why your reaction will usually keep you safe.
What You Will Learn In This Episode:
I’ll also discuss how to regain your intimacy once you’ve left a narcissistic relationship by being able to deconstruct the emotions you are feeling and using a negative reaction to create a positive outcome. We can’t change what has happened, but we can absolutely change how your body reacts to your past experiences.
Resources:
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| How A Narcissist Can Fake Empathy | 15 Feb 2022 | 00:13:49 | |
It’s common to think that your relationship is getting better when your partner starts showing empathy, but with a narcissist, they’re faking empathy to get what they want. So in this episode I’m going to show you how narcissists use empathy to manipulate the people around them and how you can ensure you don’t fall into the trap of thinking things are getting better. What You Will Learn In This Episode:
To understand how narcissists use fake empathy, I explore the different types of empathy and how narcissists can manipulate you by taking advantage of the behavior they see in actual empaths. I hope this episode will help you identify some of the warning signs when dealing with narcissists. I’d love to hear your stories and situations in dealing with “empathic” narcissists, so please share your experiences with me by emailing hello@carolinestrawson.com Resources:
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| The Narcissist Cheater & The Codependent Response | 08 Feb 2022 | 00:21:03 | |
I have experienced what it’s like to go through a relationship with a narcissist who cheats on you, and getting out of that relationship isn’t as easy as you may think. In this episode, I’m going to discuss what my experience was, and the mindset I found myself in, that made leaving my narcissistic partner so difficult.
What You Will Learn In This Episode:
From making excuses for your partner's behaviour to blaming yourself for them cheating, it’s important to get yourself into a positive mindset so that you can leave your narcissistic partner as soon as possible. I hope my story can shed some light on what a lot of people go through when they find themselves being cheated on so that you can avoid making the same mistakes.
Resources:
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| The 3 Stages Of Healing After A Narcissistic Ex | 01 Feb 2022 | 00:24:54 | |
It can feel familiar to be in a relationship with a narcissist and we sometimes need reminding that a relationship with a narcissist is an unsafe relationship. So in this episode, I will discuss the three common stages of healing after leaving a narcissist. From noticing that you are in a narcissistic relationship to having post-traumatic growth, I want to help you live a safe and comfortable life again. What You Will Learn In This Episode:
We will typically end up with narcissists because we’ve been in unhealthy relationships previously, so after breaking up with a narcissist we need to learn how to function in a healthy relationship. The 3 stages of healing that I share in this episode will help you feel comfortable in a “normal” relationship and will hopefully help you lead a better and more fulfilling life. Resources:
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| Community Support After Narcissistic Abuse | 25 Jan 2022 | 00:05:53 | |
I have some BIG NEWS! I’m currently in the process of planning the relaunch of The Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Podcast and I want YOU to have a say in the future of the podcast. Your comments and emails have been so amazing over the last year and I want nothing more than to make sure you know how grateful I am for you. So listen in to hear how you can shape the podcast so that I know what topics you want me to cover, what guests I should bring on and most of all, how I can help you in your recovery. What You Will Learn In This Episode:
I want to give you the ability to mould the future of my podcast so that I can help you the most! I want to know what you’ve enjoyed so far and what content you’d love to hear in new episodes. If you’d be so kind as to leave me feedback on the podcast to give me an insight into what you’d like to hear in future episodes, I’d be so grateful. You can let me know what you want from the podcast by filling out this form here: https://form.jotform.com/220232614900341 Resources:
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| Is Depression a Symptom of Narcissistic Abuse? | 18 Jan 2022 | 00:22:08 | |
In this episode, we will talk about depression and narcissistic abuse. Although there is some controversy around whether narcissistic abuse causes depression or not, once depression is identified in the victims of narcissistic abuse, that is not really relevant from a trauma-informed perspective. The focus should be on the origin of that depression and on the protector parts that show up. Today, I'll be sharing my experiences with depression during my marriage with my ex-husband, how I identified depression as a protector part for me and what it was trying to protect me from. What You Will Learn In This Episode: - How being diagnosed with postnatal depression affected me and the way I saw myself - What role my own stories of not feeling good enough had in my decision to stay in an abusive relationship - Why I now know that depression was acting as a protector part - The importance of getting curious about the origin of our protector parts In my case, it wasn't that my ex-husband abuse was making me feel depressed. The core wound that stepped up for me, my "depression protector part", was protecting me from what my system considered the bigger danger at the time. So my invitation for you is, instead of trying to minimise depression symptoms, to get curious about its origin and its root cause. Resources: - Episode 079 15 Gaslighting Terms A Narcissist Will Use https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/079-15-gaslighting-terms-a-narcissist-will-use/id1527479270 - Join my Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme™ https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse - Join my Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse - Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/ - My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/ | |||
| 15 Gaslighting Terms A Narcissist Will Use | 11 Jan 2022 | 00:17:24 | |
When we are in a narcissistic abusive relationship, we hear certain phrases so often that we normalise hearing them, but they actually erode our mental health. The narcissist is gaslighting us. In this episode, we will go through 15 gaslighting phrases I heard during my marriage with a covert narcissist. We will explore the devastating effects these phrases have on our confidence, mental health and on our self-worth. What You Will Learn In This Episode: - Why gaslighting is a form of abuse, and what effects it can have on our mental health - The gaslighting phrases that can make us doubt our own sanity - Why most narcissists use these gaslighting phrases to protect themselves - What we can do to prevent being gaslighted by narcissist abusers Hearing any of these 15 phrases and their variations regularly in our relationship is a huge red flag, and it should be enough to make us curious about it. The first step is to seek help, whether from a professional, a counsellor or even an online group, and then understand that we are doing what we can with the tools we have, from the programming we had from birth. We should never forget that being in an abusive relationship is not our fault; we are in it for a reason. Once we understand that reason, we can start working on it and fix it. Resources: - Join my Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme™ https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse - Join my Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse - Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/ - My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/ | |||
| 12 Signs You Are Dating a Narcissist | 04 Jan 2022 | 00:17:05 | |
Something I get asked a lot on social media is, how do I know if I'm dating a narcissist again? The decision to start dating again after a separation is personal and it doesn't have a specific time to occur. However, after suffering narcissistic abuse, whether we are looking for Mr or Mrs Right, or Mr or Mrs Right Now, one thing is sure: we want to avoid dating a narcissist. In this episode, we will go through the 12 signs you should pay attention to to know if you are dating a narcissist. What You Will Learn In This Episode: - Beware of love bombing at the beginning of the relationship - What a strong entitlement attitude is really telling us - The things we can easily spot during a casual conversation about how narcissists talk and what they talk about - Being alert to manipulative attitudes and the consequences of not following their plans - What we can read from a strong lack of commitment and a constant tendency to break the rules - Why narcissists put others down all the time, why they are master gaslighters, and why they don't have long-term friendships It usually takes some time, at least six or seven dates, to spot a narcissist. However, we can have our eyes and ears open to these 12 signs, be aware of them and see if any of them rarely appears, appears often, or almost all the time. We must be patient and we don't need to go full-blown from the very beginning. If we've found the right person and the relationship is meant to be, then time is not really an issue. Resources: - Join my Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme™ https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse - Join my Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse - Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/ - My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/ | |||
| Narcissistic Abuse & Emotional Eating | 28 Dec 2021 | 00:18:45 | |
One of the most challenging things I had to deal with during my relationship with my ex-husband was emotional eating. I'll share with you the situations that triggered my emotional eating protector parts, the effects that had on my self-image, self-esteem and mental health. We will also talk about why our body chooses emotional eating to protect us and how to deal with it. What You Will Learn In This Episode: - What exactly triggered my emotional eating protector parts - What my emotional eating was protecting me from - Why emotional eating is so effective as a pain release mechanism - What is emotional eating distracting us from, and why we must get curious about it Once we start recognising we are not our protector parts, that we are blended into them and that they are there to distract us from feeling pain, we'll start seeing things differently. It will be easier to lift the shame and guilt that trigger our emotional eating protector parts. Then we can get curious about why we feel that guilt or shame and work on those issues. Resources: - Join my Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme™ https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse - Join my Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse - Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/ - My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/ | |||
| Can You Co-Parent with a Narcissist? | 21 Dec 2021 | 00:17:22 | |
We hear pretty often that co-parenting is the best thing we can do for our children. However, those coming from an abusive relationship might find it almost impossible to be friendly with their abuser. In today's episode, we will talk about co-parenting with a narcissist, the challenges we'll find there and why it can be so triggering, and we’ll also explore an alternative to co-parenting - parallel parenting. What You Will Learn In This Episode: - Why co-parenting is not always a better choice for our family situation - What the communication challenges are that make co-parenting so hard - What parallel parenting is and how to do it properly - Some of the mistakes I made in co-parenting that you can avoid - Why parallel parenting is so effective in helping us keep our sanity We need to stop punishing ourselves for not being able to co-parent with the narcissist. We are not less of a parent if we can't co-parent. We've been in an abusive relationship and our focus must be on getting better, not on making sure the abuser is feeling better. The best thing we can give our kids is a mentally stable parent, and that’s where parallel parenting can help us. Resources: - Our Family Wizard website: https://www.ourfamilywizard.com/ - Join my Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme™ https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse - Join my Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse - Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/ - My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/ | |||
| How To Regain Your Mojo In Order To Live Healthier | 21 May 2024 | 00:16:55 | |
Pre-order my new book here: http://carolinestrawson.com/pre-order
Are you struggling to find the mojo to get out and exercise again after you’ve experienced trauma? Maybe you’ve broken out of an abusive relationship and want to lose weight, but you just keep struggling?
Trauma, whether physical or emotional, can significantly impact your motivation and ability to engage in healthy behaviours. It’s perfectly normal to feel this way, and the journey to reclaiming your health and vitality can be challenging but incredibly rewarding. Understanding how trauma affects your mind and body is the first step towards recovery.
In this episode, we'll delve into:
Podcast Resources:
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| Holiday Times & Christmas with the Narcissist | 14 Dec 2021 | 00:18:26 | |
As Christmas is getting closer, I want to talk about how to deal with a narcissist during not only this holiday, but any other type of celebration, such as birthdays or other family events. We'll explore two different scenarios, one for those separated or divorced from a narcissist, and the other for those who have to spend the holidays with a narcissist. I'll also share tips on communicating and planning these events to reduce conflict to the minimum, and how and when to respond to the narcissist's messages. What You Will Learn In This Episode: - Why is it so challenging to celebrate any holiday in peace with a narcissist - What I've learned from my experience with my narcissist ex-husband during the holidays - The advantages of planning ahead for these events, and how it can help us in court if we need it - How to structure our messages when communicating our plans with our narcissist ex-spouse - How to approach communication when we must spend the holidays with a narcissist We have an advantage when it comes to any holiday - we know precisely when they will happen. This allows us to plan, minimise and mitigate the conflict by creating the best-case scenario for our kids and us. Still, conflicts can appear, even if we plan ahead and do our best to avoid them. We must remember to stay in our lane, treat ourselves with kindness and avoid self-judgement if that happens. Resources: - Join my Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme™ https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse - Join my Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse - Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/ - My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/ | |||
| When Your Friends & Family Tell You To Ignore The Narcissist | 07 Dec 2021 | 00:18:05 | |
Today I want to talk about something I went through when I was suffering narcissistic abuse, which is when your family and friends tell you to ignore the narcissist. As always, we’ll look at this from a trauma-informed lens. First, we’ll understand what is so triggering about receiving this kind of comments from our loved ones, and then what we can do to stop being triggered and avoid getting into unnecessary conflicts. What You Will Learn In This Episode: - Why the phrase "just ignore them" triggers us so much - How hearing that from our loved ones makes us feel the need for validation - What kind of addiction narcissistic abuse creates - Why we must not feel shame or guilt for firing messages back at the narcissist We must recognise that healing from narcissistic abuse is not just doing affirmations and repeating "I'm good enough" every day. We have to perform deep work in our bodies because traumatic experiences are stored there. They get locked in our bodies and go directly into our fascia, deep into the visceral level and into our nervous system. Resources: - Join my Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme™ https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse - Join my Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse - Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/ - My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/ | |||
| Why Does a Narcissist Lie? | 30 Nov 2021 | 00:20:24 | |
For those of us who have been victimised by a narcissist, knowing they are spreading lies about us can be really triggering. It might become worse when we see people around them believing their lies and turning into what we call flying monkeys. So in this episode, we'll unravel why narcissists feel this need to spread lies about us, why it triggers a response from us and what we can do to stop reacting to their lies. What You Will Learn In This Episode: - Why narcissists continually, habitually and pathologically choose to lie - The link between the narcissist’s protector parts and their need to lie about us - If the trigger and the activation don't come from the lie per se, where they actually come from - How we can protect ourselves from being triggered by a narcissist's lies about us I used to suffer a lot because of my ex-husband's lies. I wasted tons of energy on two things I would never control - what he would say about me and what people would think when they heard that. Once I realised that, I started focusing and getting curious about what I had control over - my reaction to the lies and what protector part triggered my response. Resources: - Join my Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme™ https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse - Join my Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse - Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/ - My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/ | |||