- DATE: Aug 3, 2023
- PODCAST NAME: New Mom Naturopath
- EPISODE TITLE AND NUMBER: How to handle Judgment as a New Mom, epi # 27
As a mom with a child going through clubfoot treatment, judgment was assumed everywhere I went. My son was wearing casts from toe to thigh as an infant. People automatically assumed something happened. My gut reaction was a total shame, as people assumed I did something to my child. I harmed him or neglected him in some way. But in reality, I was making a huge sacrifice of my son's postpartum snuggles so that he could walk.
In this episode, I walk you through the steps I took to help myself deal with judgment from other mothers clearly so that you do not have to take on the judgment of others.
Ignore [8:12]
The easiest thing to do is to let people think whatever they want about you as a mom. You cannot control others' opinions and know you are doing an excellent job. But this can be super challenging because, as a new mom, you are filled with doubt. But I am here to tell you, you can ignore others' judgments. You do not owe anyone a reason for making your choices as a new parent. Period.
Educate [9:19]
Sometimes I wanted to take the time to tell people about my son’s condition, and this is an excellent time to let people know that sometimes their questions are not as benign as they think. It is never ok to assume I harmed my child, even if they are undergoing medical care. Remember, you do not owe anyone an explanation for how
you choose to parent, but sometimes there are windows of opportunity to help people grow.
Look in the MIrror [10:29]
Ugh, I hate this one. Yes, sometimes moms would come up to me and say, " My son has a clubfoot. You are doing a good job, Mom. And they had been staring at me for 20 minutes. That whole time, I had been judging them, thinking, how dare you judge me and my son’s treatment? And then I realized they were empathizing with me! How are you letting yourself feel others? How are you assuming someone is judging you? I learned this from the Judgement Detox from Gabby Bernstein. I encourage you to check that book out for more details on clearing judgment. It is not easy, but it is so worth it.