Explore every episode of the podcast My Delight with Sarah Bartel
| Title | Pub. Date | Duration | |
|---|---|---|---|
| How I Got Started Helping Catholic Wives with Sex, with Ellen Holloway | 29 Jan 2025 | 00:22:35 | |
Ellen Holloway interviews host Sarah Bartel about how she got started helping Catholic married women improve their sex lives. She also interviews Sarah about her My Delight course for Catholic women. They talk about what happens inside the course and who the course is for. MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| Advice for Newlyweds: What Every Catholic Woman Should Know About Sex with Bridget Busacker, Part 1 | 03 Feb 2025 | 00:28:02 | |
Intimacy Insights for Brides-to-Be and Newlyweds: Expert Advice from Bridget Busacker Links:
MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| Advice for Newlyweds: What Every Catholic Woman Should Know About Sex with Bridget Busacker, Part 2 | 14 Feb 2025 | 00:32:09 | |
Intimacy Insights for Brides-to-Be and Newlyweds: Expert Advice from Bridget Busacker, part 2 of 2. LINKS:
MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| How to Talk About Sex with Your Spouse with Monica Ortega | 22 Feb 2025 | 00:27:19 | |
Do you ever feel embarrassed when it comes to talking with your husband about lovemaking? Do you know how to ask for what you need... or communicate if something feels "meh" ... or even worse, hurts? Monica Ortega, co-host with her husband Renzo of the Two Become Family podcast, chats with Sarah about the book she and Renzo wrote: Lovemaking: How to Talk About Sex with Your Spouse. As a faithful Catholic couple informed by church teaching and theology of the body, they noticed that when it comes to candid and practical advice--there's still a lot to figure out! Sarah and Monica talk about mental load both spouses bear (as well as the gallant, swoon-worthy way husbands can help wives with their mental load!), feeding sexual intimacy with the whole-life intimacy that a couple builds outside the bedroom, and how to tell your husband when something gives you the heebie-jeebies. Lovemaking: How to Talk about Sex with Your Spouse, Ave Maria Press, 2025 Catholic women! Learn 9 Skills for Body, Mind and Spirit Enhancing Marital Intimacy with this free guide. Waitlist for Sarah's My Delight course for Catholic married and engaged women. MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| Self-care and Body Image with Denise Jelinek of Weight Loss with the Holy Spirit | 05 Mar 2025 | 00:33:24 | |
Sarah and Denise talk about self-care and body image. Denise a Catholic weight loss coach who helps women turn to God instead of food through her Weight Loss with the Holy Spirit program, 63 Surrendered program, and Restored Lent Challenge. Restored helps women surrender to God, not the scale. Denise shares about how authentic self-care is not about expense and luxury--it's a sacred activity given to us by the Lord. She also shares about how we can change our negative thoughts about our body. Fast from the scale and experience the freedom and peace that come from surrendering fully to the Lord with Denise's Restored Lent Challenge! Use coupon code 63LENT for $20 off. You can also find Denise online at WeightLosswiththeHolySpirit.com MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| What I Learned in the My Delight Course with NaPro Providor Jessica Whelan, ND | 28 Feb 2025 | 00:22:37 | |
What is it like to go through My Delight as a happily married newlywed with a good love life? Is there still more to learn? Sarah chats with Dr. Jessica Whelan, a naturopath specializing in hormone health who is also a certified Creighton model FertiliCare NFP instructor and NaPro providor. They discuss being the higher-desire spouse, enjoying lovemaking while struggling with infertility and trying to conceive, and communicating about intimacy with your husband. Dr. Jessica shares what it is like to be in the sisterhood of Catholic women who go through My Delight together. Find out more about Dr. Jessica Whelan's hormone and fertility work at drwhelan.com MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| Taking it from Good to Great while Raising Eight Kids...with Kristen | 13 Mar 2025 | 00:28:34 | |
Sarah speaks with My Delight alum Kristen, mother of eight, who shares her story of her and her husband's conversion, as well as how she grew through the My Delight course. Kristen felt pretty good about their love life before, but experienced insights, growth, learning, and increased connection with her husband. She shares what new evening routine they've developed that's been a game-changer and why there's a bottle of whipped cream in the fridge that she and her husband won't let the kids have. She also shares what some of the highlights were for her among the guest experts and conversations shared inside the My Delight course. MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| Pelvic Floor Health for Engaged Women and Newlyweds, with Veronica Stephens | 26 Mar 2025 | 00:15:14 | |
What do newlywed and engaged women need to know about their pelvic floor as they enter into marital intimacy? Sarah is joined by Catholic pelvic floor specialist Veronica Stephens of RenewedResilience.net. They cover the basics of what a healthy, functioning pelvic floor should be able to do, as well as a few of the problems that can arise when the pelvic floor doesn't function properly--problems such as incontinence, pain during intercourse, and constipation. Veronica shares her unique path to her profession, from her beginnings as a theology major at Christendom College to finding her way to physical training and pelvic floor certifications to help women. Sarah and Veronica discuss the mind-body connection by which a woman's beliefs and memories about sex affects her vaginal muscles. Veronica Stephens is at RenewedResilience.net MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| 7 First Time Tips for After the Wedding with Ellen Holloway | 20 Mar 2025 | 00:36:20 | |
Sarah and her amazing friend Ellen Holloway of the Charting Towards Intimacy podcast share 7 tips for engaged women preparing for their first time after the wedding. They chat about setting expectations for yourself and with your husband-to-be, what essential items you are going to want to have on hand, butterflies in the stomach, the supreme importance of FOREPLAY, being like a flower, lingerie, and having fun. Ellen Holloway's Free Foreplay Guide for Catholic Women Ellen Holloway's Charting Towards Intimacy podcast Ginger and Peach Catholic-owned model-free lingerie boutique Mentionables Model-free lingerie (10% OFF CODE: BARTEL) MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| 10 Resources for Getting the Porn Out, Healing Betrayal Trauma, and Rebuilding Authentic Intimacy | 02 Apr 2025 | 00:22:37 | |
Before you can effectively to anything else to improve your love life in marriage, you have to get the porn out. Sarah shares 10 resources, programs, and tips to help husbands get free, to help wives heal from betrayal trauma, and to help married couples rebuild their intimate life. If you wanted to redecorate your living room, but there was a fire in it, you'd have to put out the fire before you start thinking about paint colors and rearranging the furniture. Afterwards, you'd also have to clean up the scorch marks and care for burns. In the house of your marital intimacy, you need to get the porn out first in order to establish safety and authentic emotional intimacy. The distortions in assumptions about how sex should work then need to be corrected. (God made women's arousal curves much slower and longer than men's, but women in porn are paid to fake being aroused quickly.) Emotional wounds from betrayal trauma need to be healed, and the couple needs to establish their intimacy anew from the ground up. 4 Resources to Help Husbands Get Free from Porn: 1. Sexaholics Anonymous, a 12-step peer support program 2. Programs like Pure Desires, Naked Truth Project 3. Strive: 21-Day Porn Detox, a Catholic program with Matt Fradd 4. CSAT counseling (Certified Sexual Addiction Therapists) *BONUS TIP: Install device-protecting software like Covenant Eyes 3 Resources to Help Wives Heal from Betrayal Trauma 5. Hope's Garden, a Catholic ministry online that includes a coaching option 6. Coaching with Catholic coach Casey Allison 7. Bloom for Women and Bloom for Catholic Women 3 Tips to Help Post-Porn Couples Restore Authentic Intimacy 1. Talk to each other during lovemaking. This roots both husband and wife's mind in the present moment. Hearing her husband's voice is very connecting for the wife and distracts her from negative thoughts, worries that his mind is going back to memories of porn. 2. Specifically, the husband should reassure his wife out loud with words during their lovemaking time together that he's thinking only of her, that she is beautiful, her body is amazing, she is the one he chooses for life, he loves being just with her, etc. She is likely to need LOTS of reassurance. 3. Husbands, tune in to your sense of smell, which porn cannot recreate. Listen to Catholic psychologist Mario Sacasa, Ph.D. discuss this in MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| Pelvic Floor Issues in Married Life with Veronica Stephens | 16 Apr 2025 | 00:15:07 | |
Catholic pelvic floor specialist Veronica Stephens returns to discuss how pelvic floor issues can show up in married life. So many challenges can be addressed through pelvic floor work, including painful intercourse, incontinence, constipation, and possibly even erectile dysfunction (ED). (Yes, men can get pelvic floor help as well!) A healthy functioning pelvic floor also prepares a mother for better birth, and postpartum recovery for issues like diastasis rectii can be helped with pelvic floor work. Sarah and Veronica discuss how tension throughout the whole body can affect the pelvic floor, as well as how our breathing impacts pelvic floor tension. Veronica opens up about how her own personal journey with physical fitness helped her grow closer to God and find spiritual meaning in helping others optimize their overall health. Find Veronica Stephens at https://www.renewedresilience.net MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| Healing from Past Sexual Wounds, Regrets, and Harmful Messages | 18 Apr 2025 | 00:17:24 | |
Opening with "birthday cake" analogy, this episode focuses on different ways to heal from sexual wounds, abuse, regrets, and harmful messages that a woman may have suffered. These harms can bind her up and keep her from experiencing the fullness of freedom, connection, joy, and delight the the Lord intends for her in marital intimacy. During Holy Week is the perfect time to bring all these wounds to Jesus, to lay at the foot of his Cross. Therapies that can help heal emotional wounds from past sexual abuse:
Deliverance Prayer
MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| Pope Francis' Teachings on Sex in Marriage | 24 Apr 2025 | 00:48:23 | |
As we mourn the death of Pope Francis and reflect on his gifts to the church during his papacy, this is a great moment to recall his (surprisingly traditional!) teachings on sex in marriage from Amoris Laetitia, The Joy of Love. In this post-synodol apostolic exhortation from 2015 that capped the Synod on the Family, Pope Francis makes four main points about married sex: 1. The church teaches that sex is meant to be a good! It is a gift from God enriching joy in marriage, not just a "necessary evil" to be tolerated because it is the means of procreation. 2. But sex is often distorted and misused. (This ties into porn culture.) 3. Obligation sex is not church teaching. (This relates to a mistaken idea of "marital debt.") 4. Let's not be squeamish and disdainful of the body and sexuality. (This relates to purity culture.) Read Amoris Laetitia for free on the Vatican website here. MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| The Steps to Healing Past Sexual Trauma, with Catholic Therapist Dr. Mario Sacasa | 01 May 2025 | 00:54:30 | |
"It's a marvel how resilient we are." This episode cannot take the place of individual therapy, but it CAN educate and encourage you about the possibilities for healing from past sexual trauma in order to enjoy lovemaking in marriage in this conversation rooted in hope and resilience. Suppose a wife cringes when her husband touches her shoulder in a certain way and suggests they go to bed early that night. She wants to run away. She definitely does NOT want to head upstairs and engage in intimacy, even though she loves her husband. When she was younger, someone abused her sexually, and this whole realm of sexuality still feels terrible for her. If she works with a good therapist, what steps will she learn to take to go from wanting to run away to tolerating that touch on her shoulder... to eventually enjoying it, and even heading upstairs with some enthusiasm? That is what you will learn in this episode. Sarah is joined by Dr. Mario Sacasa, LMFT, a popular speaker, retreat leader, and course creator. Mario is the host of the Always Hope podcast and has served on the faculty of Notre Dame Seminary, Divine Mercy University, and the Institute for Priestly Formation. He brings an incredible combination of knowledge, spiritual insight, and practical steps to this important conversation. Sarah and Mario talk about the importance of communication between husband and wife when there is a history of past sexual trauma for one or both of them. In this episode, you'll hear some of the topics that the couple would benefit from addressing, as well as how that communication can help the other spouse understand the patience and gentleness that are needed as the healing spouse goes through their process. Right at the end, Mario asks Sarah a moral theology question about real-life imperfect outcomes that could occur during this process. Find more great conversations with Dr. Mario Sacasa on dating, marriage, sexuality, and the misunderstood virtue of hope on his Always Hope podcast! Dr. Mario's Dating Well course takes young adults by the hand and guides Dr. Mario's course on Overcoming Stress and Anxiety, produced by Good Catholic Media, offers information and skills to beat anxious thoughts. MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| Talking with Your Kids about Sex with Dr. Julia Sudusky | 06 Jun 2025 | 00:57:31 | |
What can parents do to help prevent sexual abuse of their kids AND raise them to have a balanced, shame-free attitude towards their bodies? What should you do if your child keeps touching themselves? Dr. Julia Sadusky, a licensed clinical psychologist, and author, shares how Catholic parents can talk to their children and teens about sex in a healthy, helpful way. Dr. Sadusky shares practical advice for addressing:
So many adult women in marriage feel bad about their bodies and about their sexuality. Sarah has seen this with the married and engaged women she coaches. This type of conversation can help women heal their own sexual mindsets, which can allow them to feel more free to enjoy their love lives with their husbands in marriage. Read these helpful books to learn more! Start Talking to Your Kids About Sex: A Practical Guide for Catholics, by Julia Sadusky Talking with Your Teen About Sex: A Practical Guide for Catholics, by Julia Sadusky Find Dr. Julia Sadusky on her website, juliasadusky.com MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| How Often Should You Be Doing It in Your Catholic Marriage? 🤔 | 01 Jun 2025 | 00:21:55 | |
How frequently should you be making love in your marriage? This episode is all about frequency! In it, I share about: -Quality vs. quanity -Desire differences between spouses -Spontaneous vs. responsive libido -What the Church teaches about frequency (you might be surprised!) -How to communicate about it as a couple -One Christian author's observation about frequency to consider MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| Perimenopause, Hormones, and Libido with Christina Valenzuela | 22 May 2025 | 00:55:38 | |
What is perimenopause? How long does it last? What are the signs that you are in it? How can it affect your fertility and libido? Sarah talks with Christina Valenzuela, creator of the Perimenopause Prep Course, about thriving in the years before and after menopause. Understanding perimenopause, learning how to support your body through it, and communicating with your husband about your love life through this major change can empower you as a woman to be more positive and proactive about your hormonal and sexual well-being as the fertile years wind down. Check out Christina Valenzuela's wonderful Perimenopause Prep course! Pearl and Thistle offers:
MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| Sex and the Single (or Dating) Catholic Woman with Maria Spears Mumaugh | 08 May 2025 | 00:38:29 | |
What challenges do single Catholic women face as they strive to live chastely while waiting to be married? How far is it okay to go when you are dating? How does a single woman develop of positive view of sex while not actually having sex? Maria Spears Mumaugh, a musician and mindset coach, is the co-founder of The Intentional Single, which helps single Catholic women thrive in the years of dating and single life as they prepare for marriage. She shares the struggles single women face regarding porn use, feeling "touch-starved" (and what to do about it), navigating appropriate boundaries while dating, and navigating purity culture's burden of anxiety and shame around sexuality. They chat about fears dating women have about their boyfriends' (or future husband's) porn use, and how to address this likely possibility if marriage is in view. Join in this fun conversation about thriving as a whole woman and laying a great foundation for your married sex life WHILE being single and dating. Maria Spears Mumaugh's book The Mirror MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| 3 Reasons Why You Don't Like Sex (Catholic wives) | 16 Jun 2025 | 00:25:22 | |
Are you not enjoying sex in your Catholic marriage? I bet I know why. It's likely at least one of these top 3 reasons that come up with women all the time in my coaching. 1. Obligation sex. 2. Not enough foreplay 3. Not enough emotional connection Women, your enjoyment of sex matters just as much as your husband's pleasure! You are created equal. Know your worth as a woman. Resources mentioned in this show: Ellen Holloway's Charting Towards Intimacy podcast! 😍 Obligation Sex article series by Sheila Gregoire A Catholic moral philosopher countering the idea of marital debt: Dr. Tim Pawls 2 part interview series on Bridget Busacker's Managing Your Fertility Podcast Improve emotional connection with the Cana Feast Retreat Library or the Abundant course, both available on CanaFeast.com. Or try our free Little Way of Marriage workshop to learn small things that can improve your emotional and spiritual connection in marriage. My new sex course for Catholic engaged and newlywed women! The Wedding Night and Beyond: A Catholic Bride's Guide to Sex and Intimacy MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| Don't Put Your Marriage on the Back Burner! 3 Reasons to Keep Growing | 09 Jul 2025 | 00:25:01 | |
The Abundant Catholic marriage course is on sale for 50% off (coupon code: JOY) until Thurs, June 10th in honor of the upcoming feast of Sts. Louis and Zelie Martin!🌹 Learn more at canafeast.com/abundant Yes, life is busy... but that doesn't mean you can let your marriage stagnate on the back burner. Here are three reasons why you NEED to keep growing in your marriage and relationship skills, as well as some ideas for how to work on your marriage. 1. Continuing education is important (and often required!) for professionals so they stay up to date and pursue excellence, whether as teachers, doctors, engineers, or accountants. In marriage, we also need continuing education! Continual growth, improvement, and change for the better is also part of the call every Christian has to continual conversion and growth in holiness. In marriage, we need to keep learning how to love better. 2. Your kids and community deserve for your to be the best example of marriage you can be. Could you see your kids growing up and saying, "I want a marriage like my parents had?" This should be our goal! 3. Your sex life will benefit from improving your relationship skills, communication, connection, and togetherness! Sexual intimacy thrives in a marriage climate of emotional intimacy. It needs it in order to do what God designed it to do--to be a total, mutual, personal gift of self that is the physical expression of the spiritual communion of husband and wife. Different ways to grow in your marriage can include: reading books about marriage and relationships, listening to podcasts, doing an online course, going on a marriage retreat, intentionally carving out time for each other, or going to counseling as a learning experience. MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| 3 Keys to Emotional Intimacy from Sts. Louis and Zelie Martin | 02 Jul 2025 | 00:22:09 | |
In this episode, I’m joined by my husband Nathan as we share three keys to building emotional intimacy in marriage, inspired by Saints Louis and Zélie Martin. You will hear about how this saintly couple put faith at the center of their relationship, and how they stayed connected and united to each other while honoring each other’s differences. We also share practical examples from our own marriage and offer a lot of encouragement along the way! If you want to join my husband and I for a deeper look at the spirituality of Sts. Louis and Zelie Martin, along with the "Little Way" of their daughter, Saint Therese of Lisieux, register for our free Little Way of Marriage workshop! 👉 Little Way of Marriage Workshop: 🌹 🌹 🌹 MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| NFP with a Contraceptive Mentality? It's Not a Thing. | 25 Jul 2025 | 00:14:33 | |
Can you use NFP with a contraceptive mentality? Is this something to beware of? No. Sarah debunks the false worry that NFP users need to watch out for using NFP with a contraceptive mentality. She looks at the origin of the phrase in magisterial Catholic documents in its context to discover what the "contraceptive mentality" actually refers to, and points to additional references. References for This Episode: Magisterial Catholic Church Documents: Familiaris consortio (1981, St. John Paul II) Gaudium et spes (Vatican II, read esp. paragraphs 48-52 for beautiful teachings on marriage) The Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality (1995, Pontifical Council for the Family) Other References: "NFP: The Myth of the Contraceptive Mentality," article by Fr. Ryan Erlenbush "That Pesky 'Contraceptive Mentality,'" blog post by Christina Valenzuela of Pearl & Thistle The Contraceptive Mentality is Real, But It's Probably Not What You Think, blog post by Simcha Fisher. "How to Talk about the Use and Abuse of Natural Family Planning and the Importance of Accuracy in Translation and Description," academic article by Kevin E. Miller in the Linacre Quarterly MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| Marital Debt is Not Church Teaching | 24 Jul 2025 | 00:39:37 | |
What is this idea of marital debt? Where is it in the Catechism, or in other official magisterial Church documents? (Hint: It's not actually there!) What does a belief in marital debt do to a married Catholic or Christian woman? In this episode, Sarah tackles marital debt head-on, debunking the idea that obligation sex for wives is the teaching of the Church. She shares quotes from official church teachings and looks to a common quote from the Supplement to the Summa (not actually written by St. Thomas Aquinas, but by one of his students) that is used to support an obligation sex idea of marital debt. At the end of the episode, she shares additional podcasts you can listen to in order to learn more about how marital debt is not official Catholic Church teaching. These are: MissHappyCatholic: Marital Debt Deep Dive Parts 1 + 2: Facts and Fictions MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| How to Say No (Nicely!) | 16 Jul 2025 | 00:09:47 | |
How do you lovingly decline your husband's initiation of sex in a way that is still connecting and that doesn't feel like such a harsh personal rejection to him? In this episode, you'll learn how to put your "no" inside a Positivity Sandwich that affirms him and your desire to be connected in your relationship. *I address women declining husbands' initiations in this episode, but this technique is also very good for husbands to use when declining their wife's initiation, also! MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| What Counts as Just Cause for Using NFP? | 01 Aug 2025 | 00:10:49 | |
How grave do your reasons need to be to use NFP to avoid pregancy? The precise language the Church uses in Humanae Vitae discussing the kinds of reasons legitimating using NFP actually refers to "just reasons," "serious reasons," or "well-grounded reasons." The phrase "grave reason" is a mistranslation which gives the misleading impression that you have to be practically on death's doorstep or so broke you're eating dirt in order to use NFP to avoid. In this episode, Sarah looks at the categories of reasons Humanae vitae mentions, and offers some specific examples. She also recommends a way to pray together as husband and wife to get on the same page about your intention to avoid or try to achieve pregnancy. Resources mentioned in the show: "How to Talk about the Use and Abuse of Natural Family Planning and the Importance of Accuracy in Translation and Description," academic article by Kevin E. Miller in the Linacre Quarterly MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| Why Discovering Your Libido Brakes and Accelerators Is Important | 07 Aug 2025 | 00:17:19 | |
What gets you in the mood? That's an accelerator. What are you libido-killers? Those are your breaks. In this episode, Sarah describes common brakes and accelerators for women. She shares some ideas for how to learn what your own personal brakes and accelerators are, and suggests how you can use this knowledge in order to optimize your love life in your marriage. Resources mentioned in this episode. Come as You Are, Emily Nagoski (a book by a secular researcher on female sexuality0 "Libido Killer" by Holderness Family Music (a humorous video, G-rated and safe for work) MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| What about Period Sex? | 29 Aug 2025 | 00:06:20 | |
What about having sex during your period (as a married Catholic woman)? What are some things to think about? There are no moral prohibitions to this in the Catholic faith. Different NFP methods may have guidance around avoiding period sex if you're trying to avoid pregnancy. Some women may just avoid it because they assume it's yucky, but in this episode, Sarah challenges this thought. It is beautiful to be a woman, and having a period is part of the goodness of God's plan in creating women. Sarah shares practical tips, as well as a book consideration for hormonal health, Hormone Intelligence by Aviva Romm. Related: On the Dignity and Vocation of Women, by St. John Paul II (1988) MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| What about Quickies? | 25 Aug 2025 | 00:17:06 | |
Are quick lovemaking sessions (less than 20-30 min or so) a good idea in your Catholic marriage, or not? In this episode, Sarah offers some cautionary and probing questions meant to identify if quickies are helping build your unity and connection or if they're reinforcing bad habits in your love life. She draws on quotes from Church documents to identify some principles to help you discern whether they're serving the highest goals of marriage. While the Catholic Church does not offer specific guidelines or rules about how long lovemaking sessions should be, in most cases, Sarah personally recommends against quickies. God created female sexuality to normally require much more time per lovemaking session in order to operate well and thrive. Some circumstances in which quickies might be a good idea are treated in this episode. Catholic Church documents referenced in this episode:
"Sexuality, by means of which man and woman give themselves to one another through the acts which are proper and exclusive to spouses, is not something simply biological, but concerns the innermost being of the human person as such. It is realized in a truly human way only if it is an integral part of the love by which a man and woman commit themselves totally to one another until death." "Another effect that gives cause for alarm is that a man who grows accustomed to the use of contraceptive methods may forget the reverence due to a woman, and, disregarding her physical and emotional equilibrium, reduce her to being a mere instrument for the satisfaction of his own desires, no longer considering her as his partner whom he should surround with care and affection." "This conjugal faith, however, which is most aptly called by St. Augustine the "faith of chastity" blooms more freely, more beautifully and more nobly, when it is rooted in that more excellent soil, the love of husband and wife which pervades all the duties of married life and holds pride of place in Christian marriage. For matrimonial faith demands that husband and wife be joined in an especially holy and pure love, not as adulterers love each other, but as Christ loved the Church. This precept the Apostle laid down when he said: "Husbands, love your wives as Christ also loved the Church,"[24] that Church which of a truth He embraced with a boundless love not for the sake of His own advantage, but seeking only the good of His Spouse.[25] The love, then, of which We are speaking is not that based on the passing lust of the moment nor does it consist in pleasing words only, but in the deep attachment of the heart which is expressed in action, since love is proved by deeds.[26] This outward expression of love in the home demands not only mutual help but must go further; must have as its primary purpose that man and wife help each other day by day in forming and perfectin MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| 5 Reasons It's Worth Working on It | 26 Sep 2025 | 00:11:14 | |
Maybe you're a Catholic wife with sex struggles in your marriage, but you think, "Oh well, that's just how it is." In this episode, Sarah lays out five reasons why it's worth your bother to figure out how to make things better for you. 1. You're worth it. 2. Sex is the body language of the wedding vows, so learning how to communicate the messages of love in those vows well is important. 3. The practice of improving your experience of your love life can strengthen your marriage. 4. You want to model a healthy, holy, positive view of sex for your kids. 5. It's not going to get better on its own. MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| What Is There for Husbands? ... with Nathan Bartel | 08 Oct 2025 | 00:44:46 | |
In this episode, Sarah welcomes special guest Nathan Bartel... her husband! Sarah asks Nathan about what led him to create his Holy Desires course for husbands. Along the way, they chat about:
Nathan's 6-week Holy Desires class open through Friday, Oct. 10th, and won't reopen until March 2026. Check it out here if interested. Want his free guide, Three Secrets to Becoming the Lover of Her Dreams? Here you go! MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||
| What Can You Do in NFP Abstinence Time? | 02 Oct 2025 | 00:13:05 | |
If you're using NFP to avoid pregnancy (TTA), how can you thrive in your marriage with the abstinence period in your fertile window? How do you stay close? What sort of physical affection and touch is appropriate? (No genital stimulation for intentional arousal.) How can you harness the extra boost from the ovulation hormones to set yourself up for better lovemaking once you get the green light again? MORE RESOURCES Free Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women) Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10) Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables. | |||