It has taken over 22 years for Adam and Danielle to be able to have a conversation about the topic of finance without it ending in a fit of rage, resentment, and frustration. For the first time, they can each admit to their mistakes, and the ways they individually and cohesively have contributed to the mistakes they've made, and their negligence concerning preparing for the future. Yes, this is definitely a testament to the progress they've made and the incredible work they've done, but it doesn't change the fact that they'll be feeling the impacts of their poor decisions for years to come. This is a topic that is so seldom discussed by couples in a way that's so public and especially, so honest, that they weren't sure if they should edit some of it out. However, they decided not to touch it. Hopefully, their vulnerability will inspire other couples to have similar conversations, and even learn from Adam and Danielle's mistakes. More specifically, some of the issues they discuss surrounding money and finances in this episode are:

• How differently they grew up regarding money and spending.
• How being a stay-at-home-mom impacted Danielle's ideas about financial decision making within their family.
• The frustration of being the person in charge of buying the daily necessities for the household vs. the frustrations of being the one in charge of paying the bigger bills.
• How "keeping up with the joneses" has impacted them, especially regarding raising kids.
• How honest should we be with our kids about our financial situation?
• What has caused this shift in Danielle's mentality concerning budgeting, and being an active participant in solving their financial issues?
• How our past experiences, as well as expectations about spending/money affects our overall mindset about what we need/want/deserve regardless of whether or not we can afford it.

Stay tuned for part two of this topic, in which we delve even further into these issues and so much more!

Please don't forget to Rate and Review on Apple and or Spotify. A five-star rating truly helps us so much and only takes a minute.

Want to have this type of dynamic, gentle, honest conversation with you partner? Purchase the Date Night Questions print version, and use code "MNMPODCAST" for 20% off plus free shipping. Or, download it immediately with the ebook version, and use code "RECONNECT" for 15% off.

Trying to incorporate more gratitude, equity, and understanding into your relationship, use the framework that got Adam and Danielle to the place they are now as a couple, by purchasing the Small Change, Big Impact Challenge, and use code "SCBI15" for 15% off!

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Is there a such thing as too many discussions about the mental load? Until it stops being one of the most complicated issues in relationships, the answer is definitely no. Danielle and Adam were so happy that Zach joined them for a conversation about all the different facets and nuances about the mental load which are rarely discussed. In fact, for a couple that has spoken more about this topic than most partners, they each learned a lot of new, insightful information. Plus, they discuss how far they've come since their devastating fight from one year ago, that almost caused Danielle to leave. Plus, with the upcoming holidays, the three of them tackle the different ways that time of year can make the division of mental and emotional labor even more complicated. This is another one of those episodes that you'll definitely want to share with your partner and ask them to listen. There is a lot of great info in this discussion.

Follow Zach on instagram, and check out his awesome coaching and facilitator services on his website.

Be sure to sign up for the Marriage and Martinis Holiday Challenge, if you often feel like the sole magic maker during the holiday season, leaving you exhausted and overwhelmed. Purchase the regular version for the downloads only, or join us for the 30-day interactive version starting October 27th. THIS WEEK ONLY: 20% off both versions of the holiday challenge. Discount applied at checkout.

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When Danielle discovered Dr. Kat, she knew she needed to have her on to ask her about so many recent revelations she’s had about her personal experience with perinatal OCD, birth trauma, and postpartum depression. As Danielle learns more and unpacks an experience she had almost 20 years ago, she can’t help but wish she could go back and tell her younger self so many things. She can’t, but she can ask the questions for the women who may encounter (or have encountered) similar issues during their pregnancies. This conversation is one that should be listened to be everyone, regardless of gender, marital and parenting status, and whether or not people personally deal with issues with perinatal Mental Health….it absolutely should be on EVERYONE’S radar. Danielle and Dr Kat discuss:

⁃What exactly does the term “perinatal mental health” encompass?

⁃Are there regulations in place to ensure that OBGYNs are educated on modern discourse concerning PMH?

⁃What are Dr Kat’s thoughts about waiting three months to tell people you’re pregnant?

⁃What necessary questions would she tell every couple (or single human looking to get pregnant) to ask prospective OBGYN’s before choosing a physician?

⁃What might be some prior warning signs that someone might encounter issues with perinatal mental health?

⁃What exactly is a “birth trauma,” and how does a woman know whether or not she went through one?

⁃What does Dr. Kat want every person to know about perinatal mental health and how you can help someone who might be experiencing it in some way? 

Make sure you follow Dr. Kat on IG at @momandmind and listen to her podcast Mom and Mind wherever you get podcasts.

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Popular divorce coach Michelle Dempsey-Multack not only survived her own divorce, but figured out how to move on with her life, just like you will, too. Now happily remarried with a blended family, she’s living proof that no matter which “firsts” you might be experiencing as you end your marriage, and no matter how long you stayed with someone who didn’t meet your needs, your best days are ahead. In this episode, Danielle and Michelle discuss everything from, what really stops most women from leaving toxic relationships, what a person needs to do to prepare to leave, co-parenting, and the myths of divorce that need to be cleared up once and for all. Danielle talks about her own near-divorce and why she felt like leaving wasn't an option. Michelle discusses the details of her own divorce and how growing up with a single mother greatly affected her decision to leave and "move on." Even if you're not someone who has ever contemplated starting again, this episode is so filled with perspectives that will help each of us better support someone else we love who may have chosen to leave a relationship.

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

Pre-order "Moms Moving On"

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In this episode ("proud," "congrats," and "family or friends who are like family"), Adam and Danielle discuss the big milestone of their son becoming a Bar Mitzvah, and all the components that go into planning a big celebration like this. The two go into detail all about how religion impacted their upbringing, and which traditions and practices they hope to continue, and which they have decided don't hold much meaning for them. How being a part of the "sandwich generation" is tricky due to the pressure of older generations to uphold parts of religion that might not be as relevant for today's world. Plus, have these parties and celebrations gotten out of hand concerning the cost, time, and effort that go into planning? No matter what religion (or lack thereof) you practice(d), this episode is definitely extremely relatable and offers a lot of insight into how partners can come together to figure out how to blend two different experiences into one successful lifestyle.

To have these meaningful conversations:

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

Danielle and Adam's party planner (not a sponsored ad, she's just awesome)

https://www.360creativeapproach.com

https://www.instagram.com/360creativeapproach/

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Original airdate: 07/30/2020. What makes a person sexy? How has Danielle and Adam's ideas of sexiness changed over the years? Turn offs? How does body image affect their sexual identity and confidence? This episode covers so many different aspects of sexiness, lust, compliments, and all the things we try to keep going throughout the years of our relationship. Plus, what's the sexiest place Danielle and Adam have ever been, sexiest movie they've ever watched, etc.

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

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Vanessa Marin is a sex therapist who is on a mission to help as many women as possible achieve their first orgasm. She also wants it to feel more natural to talk about sex with your partner. Her husband, Xander, is just a "regular dude" who decided to quit his corporate job to join Vanessa in her practice. Together they have helped normalize the conversation about intimacy and help couples feel more comfortable in the bedroom. The two couples chat about everything from why women fake orgasm to dirty talk in the bedroom, to their openness about most likely not wanting to have children, and why it is such an important conversation to keep having.

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

Learn more about Vanessa and Xander here

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Danielle sat down with friend and fellow content creator Linda Fruits to hear all about her recent journey to discovering her true sexual identity. Linda discusses how her Tik Tok "for you" page made her question herself and her sexuality. Finally, should could no longer hide from the reality that she was attracted to women. The next steps? Coming out to her husband, family, friends, and huge social media following. In this episode, she details all of these events, as well as how she and her husband are dealing with everything that has happened in the past few months. She and Danielle discuss, as friends, things they wish they had been told about experimentation and sexuality when they were younger, and what they're hoping to teach their own kids. This episode is filled with so much honesty, and Linda and Danielle both hope that it will help other women live their own truth.

Follow Linda on instagram https://www.instagram.com/fruitsofmotherhood/

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

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In an episode that Adam describes as, "one of his favorite we've ever recorded," the two discuss more concerning etiquette and how these unwritten "rules" have affected their lives. Adam goes deep into the frustration of owning a retail business and why "the customer isn't always right." Danielle talks about the workers who she thinks should be tipped ALL THE MONEY for what they are expected to do. They also talk about the hardships of teaching kids how to behave out in the world when over the last 18 months, there has been a whole lot of time at home. What "teachable moments" are important to Danielle regarding her kids, and how is she trying to make up for lost time during the pandemic when it comes to showing their kids how to be socially considerate and caring with people you know, and when it comes to strangers.

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

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Danielle is admittedly horrible when it comes to stuff like thank you notes and RSVPing. Adam has impeccable bathroom etiquette and is much better at giving Danielle gifts than she is for him. In this fun episode, the two of them discuss everything from whether or not asking a girl's father for her hand in marriage is outdated, whether or not it's appropriate to make out in the backseat of an Uber, and whether or not partners should be ok sharing toothbrushes. Danielle shares poll results from the Marriage and Martinis community and shares some of people's extremely passionate thoughts about certain types of etiquette.

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

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TRIGGER WARNINGS: In-depth discussion of miscarriage, stillbirth, postpartum, and pregnancy complications.

Liz Lehmann is a postpartum doula whose own journey through pregnancies and expanding her family has been one filled with a great deal of struggle, strength, and volatility. She has since used her own experiences to advocate for mothers and make sure women get the support and nurturing they need and deserve, whatever the road to expanding their family might look like for them. Danielle and Liz discuss Liz's extremely difficult history with pregnancy and delivery, her path to becoming a doula and what the role means to her, why every woman deserves to give pregnancy lots of care and attention, and why it is so important to her that she share her real, unique story. Visit Liz on instagram @nourishedfam and her website nourishedfamilies.org

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

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Adam and Danielle sat down and spoke with Tammy, AKA "The Cannabis Cutie" all about the science, myths, taboos, and the future of weed and the growing industry around it. Tammy talks about how she first became so passionate about cannabis, how moms should stop feeling guilty of using cannabis, all the benefits of the plant itself and so much more. Visit Tammy in instagram @thecannabiscutie

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

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Their wedding day is not really something about which Adam and Danielle talk very much. In fact, they don't even have a picture from their wedding day anywhere in their house. During this really in depth discussion, the two of them talk about everything from how Danielle rushed Adam into getting engaged, why getting married so young presented some problems for them, how discrepancies about how money should be spent led to contention, and why they actually wouldn't go back and change a thing. Plus, they share a lot of information from their listeners and community, and go into detail about what they will tell their own kids about weddings and marriage. Whether you're single, engaged, married, or divorced, this is an episode you will not want to miss.

Sign up for BetterHelp.com/marriageandmartinis and get 10% off your first month with the world's largest network of licensed, accredited, and experienced therapists.

Turn date night into a fresh, purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

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In what will most likely be the most honest conversation about masturbation you've ever heard a real couple have, Adam and Danielle answer every question you've been wanting to ask about self pleasure. The two discuss the first time they each discovered they were capable of achieving orgasm without a partner, and how their experiences with masturbation have continued throughout the years. Some extremely open and raw discussions include:

• What are each of their routines before and following sessions of masturbation.
• Danielle asks Adam what his feelings are about mutual self-pleasure, and shares her past experiences.
• Adam discusses why he rarely makes time for self-pleasure, and what the circumstances are when he does.
• Danielle talks about why self-pleasure is one way women are absolutely the "luckier" gender.
• The two discuss sex toys such as "the fleshlight," "the stroker," vibrators," and "extra large replicas of the make sexual anatomy.
• Danielle asks Adam if he would ever experiment with Prostate play.
• The two, for the first time, reveal their fantasies during self-pleasure and why it's been such a questionable topic in the past.

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Andy Hill was just a regular husband and dad when he started to get really interested in finances and made a commitment to live debt and mortgage free. Fast forward to a few years, when he quit his corporate job and has done what most people think is impossible; made a living as a full time blogger and podcaster helping other people achieve financial freedom just like he and his wife did. Danielle, Adam, and Andy get real about the financial struggles and how insanely expensive it is just to live and raise kids. Danielle and Adam open up about some of their financial missteps and ask Andy what is REALLY involved in being debt and mortgage free: the sacrifices a person has to make, how long it takes, and what small changes we can start making right now that will have a big impact on our future. Adam also asks Andy about cryptocurrency, a topic with which Adam is currently pretty obsessed. Even if you don't consider yourself a financial guru, this episode is well worth listening to and is extremely relatable no matter your level of knowledge about money.

To continue the conversation about finances in a relatable and gentle manner, purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

To learn more about Andy and his journey to become debt free, visit marriagekidsandmoney.com

Looking to ensure your kids learn about a healthy spending and savings habits from a young age? Visit gohenry.com and use code "Martinis" for one month of their amazing debit card for kids.

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** This episode contains some discussion of childhood discipline and parental relationships. Please take care if this is a topic for which is sensitive or triggering for anyone and deciding whether or not this is a good episode for you.

Adam and Danielle have just returned from a very long overdue trip, just the two of them. After vacationing in the tropical paradise of Brooklyn, the two are feeling the effects of their romantic getaway. Two two discuss how this trip compared to the same trip they took three years ago, why one trip can change the entire course of a relationship, and getting up the courage to finally get a tattoo after waiting over twenty years to "wait for the right time." Danielle discusses how her dad might feel about it, how the tattoo in some way connects her to her beloved late grandmother, Bubbi, and why this was the right time to finally stop talking about it and just do it.

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

Visit ridge.com promo code "MARRIAGE" for 10% off of all the functional, gorgeous gear for all of your upcoming adventures or just for a better everyday lifestyle.

Visit gohenry.com promo code "MARRIAGE" for a free month of the kids' debit card that will help teach your children about money and spending.

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During the month of June, Adam worked more hours than he has maybe ever worked. He's been exhausted all month from his job, and Danielle has been exhausted from all of the stuff going on with the kids and household. The feeling of "languishing," that feeling like you just can't seem to enjoy things or make progress in life has been overwhelming for both of them. This is the first conversation the two of them have had together in weeks, and they catch up Mia's evaluation (details in episode #166), Adam's vaping habit and how his attempt to quit is going, and their hopes for their upcoming getaway together.

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

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TRIGGER WARNINGS: discussions of porn, rough sex, and other sexual acts that might be uncomfortable and/or upsetting for some people.

Sara Rosen, AKA "The Kink Therapist," has made it her mission to create shame-free spaces in which people can openly discuss their kinks, fetishes and fantasies no matter how "taboo" society tells us they are. Danielle and Adam ask Sara all about her journey to becoming a kink therapist, what it is about the topic excites her so much, and why it's so important to discuss kinks and fetishes more frequently and honestly. They also ask her some popular questions from listeners, and reveal their own past experiences in the bedroom when shame played a role. The Kink Therapist reveals the benefits of "Fantasy Disclosure" with your partner, and some kinks and fetishes that are far more common than people might realize.

Follow Sara Rosen, The Kink Therapist

For the "Yes, No, Maybe Sexual Checklist" talked about in the episode and more tools for sexual communication, purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

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Danielle and Dr. Traci Baxley have a candid conversation about everything from interracial marriage, to privilege, to how to handle it when people say, "agree to disagree," about social issues and race. Danielle asks how parents can implement teachings and actions to help their kids become better allies and more conscientious human beings. Have we come as far as we think concerning progress, and what do we still need to do? Follow Dr. Baxley on instagram at @socialjusticeparenting and check out her website Social Justice Parenting.

Visit crowdcow.com/marriageandmartinis and use promo code "marriageandmartinis25" to get $25 off your order.

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

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Danielle has an absolute blast having girl talk with Tammin and Roxy of the Women on top podcast. She asks Tammin (Pretty Little Liars) and Red Carpet Roxy (Hollywood entertainment host) all about how the standards of Hollywood impact their views on sex, all about their sexual fantasies, and how the pandemic has impacted their sex lives. It's an hour of pure honesty, laughter, and feeling like you're chatting with three of your good friends. Check out Women on Top Podcast wherever you get your podcasts, and make sure to go follow them on instagram at @womenontop @tamminsursok and @redcarpetroxy.

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Danielle and Adam take a fun walk down memory lane talking about everything from their first memories, to what they collected as kids, to stuff their parents did that would get them arrested today. They also discuss what they would like to replicate from the households in which they grew up, and what they're hoping to do differently. What part of the 80s and 90s are they sad that their kids won't ever experience? If you grew up in the late 70s, 80s, and 90s, this is an episode you won't want to miss.

Want to ask your partner the questions Danielle and Adam ask each other in this episode and others? Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off and have all the conversations you've always wanted to experience with your partner.

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Last week's Guilt Episode, Revisited, uncovered a lot of questions that had gone unanswered after not talking much about this topic for the past two and a half years. Now, Adam and Danielle are breaking down Adam's feelings, giving advice to couples going through similar situations, and exploring how to trust a partner again after a period of contention. Should a spouse be allowed to go through her or his partner's social media? Is there a time limit on anger and hurt? Adam and Danielle are discussing it all.

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Laura Tremaine is an avid podcaster, writer, and reader, who has spent several years sharing all aspects of herself with her audience. Danielle wanted to sit down with Laura to discuss her new book, "Share Your Stuff, I'll Go First," because they both have similar feelings about putting it all out there in the name of others feeling less alone. This episode is truly "girl talk" at its best. The whole basis of the book is prompts for conversations with friends or other people in your life, and the two of them go deep discussing their childhoods, how they deal with other people judging them for revealing too much information, checking up on past boyfriends on Facebook, and so much more. Grab a cup of coffee and sit down with these two women and get ready to feel like you're talking with two good friends.

Check out Laura's book Share Your Stuff, I'll Go First

Check out Laura On Instagram

Visit Laura's website

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

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Two-and-a-half years ago, Adam and Danielle put out their most downloaded episode ever, revealing some very personal details of their marriage. To this day, it remains one of the most revealing and vulnerable episodes of any relationship podcast. Now, they're talking about all the ways they've grown and evolved since the release of that episode, and the ways in which they are still affected by those same issues. Danielle asks some questions she still has about that infamous night, and Adam tries to explain the details of the mysterious aspects that surround the night of Danielle 40th birthday celebration. There is still a lot to discuss about that night, and although love the current state of their relationship, those memories have not just disappeared. NOTE: THIS IS A VERY RAW CONVERSATION HAPPENING IN REAL TIME.

There's a lot of history, frustration, emotion, and pent up curiosity here, and listeners are encouraged to listen with an understanding that this is an extremely personal issue they are sharing with the world, unedited.

Danielle gets extremely raw in this episode, and so much comes pouring out that she has been waiting to say for so long. Part 2 will highlight more about Adam's experience and how they will both be moving forward together.

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

Check out more about Ovia's supportive platforms and FREE apps at https://info.oviahealth.com/marriage

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Listeners always ask Danielle and Adam to do an episode with their three kids, asking what it's like to have them as parents, and to have the podcast out there in the world for all to hear. Finally, the time has come for Danielle and Adam to sit down with each kid, individually, (Mia 18, Ean 16, and Jonah 12) to discuss all the questions about life with Danielle and Adam. Some questions include:

• What are the best and worst things about having them as parents
• In what ways are Danielle and Adam "abnormal" parents
• In what ways has the podcast impacted their lives?
• What do they think the podcast is really about?
• What do they really think about Danielle's recent boudoir shoot?
• What do they think Danielle and Adam will be like as grandparents?

And so much more!!

Download our Mother's Day activities here and use code "MAMALOVE" for 15% off.

Contact Evgenia to learn more about her special boudoir offer ONLY for listeners of Marriage and Martinis.

Check out Sojo Spa Club for the perfect Mother's Day experience, or just an experience to slow down and savor the day.

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In several podcast episodes, Danielle has been very open about her struggles with OCD since she was diagnosed at 19-years-old. But on today's episode, she and Alegra talk about Obsessive Compulsive disorder in a raw, deep way that can only be done by two people who have suffered from the illness firsthand. Alegra is a therapist and expert in OCD with her own specialized practice in NYC, and runs the amazing instagram account and community @obsessivelyeverafter. The two talk all about the different types of OCD, how to be a good advocate, what REAL therapy looks like, and what parents can look for in their kids if they're concerned a child might be showing signs of OCD. Whether you suffer from OCD, know someone who does, or have always just wanted to better understand this illness, this is an episode you will not want to miss.

Follow Alegra on Instagram at instagram.com/obsessivelyeverafter

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This might be Danielle and Adam's most vulnerable episode yet. What do they both feel guilt about on a daily basis, and what are the more serious issues that they struggle with concerning feelings of shame? Plus, Adam relives a night when he made one of the most horrible and humiliating mistakes in the history of their relationship. If you're a Marriage and Martinis fan, this is an episode you won't want to miss.

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

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In the third episode of their series on women's health, Adam and Danielle got a chance to ask Ovia Health specialist Christine Peter all about the different aspects of infertility: the stigmas, misconceptions, and statistics that surround this oftentimes unspoken about struggle.

Check out more about Ovia's supportive platforms and FREE apps at https://info.oviahealth.com/marriage

Visit this link to get 15% off your first Promescent order

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

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Danielle often feels so much guilt about the waste that occurs in her household. Over the past year, she's tried taking certain steps to become a bit "greener," but she has way more work to do trying to raise kids who care more about the planet. In this episode, Jessie helps her realize that any steps towards more sustainability is a win, and we don't have to take huge leaps in our changes, but rather can pick and choose which eco-friendly practices and products work best for us individually and as families. This episode is filled with awesome information, tips, products, and truths to help us all be better citizens of planet Earth.

Follow Jessie on all platforms @tinyyellowbungalow

Sign up for the Friday Five email with Date Night Questions at marriageandmartinis.com

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Danielle had the incredible pleasure of sitting down with her 15-year-old daughter, Mia, and Mia's hero, Autism advocate and wildly popular influencer, Chloe Hayden. Chloe and Mia talk about their own journeys with getting evaluated for Autism, what a diagnosis means to them, how the neurodivergent community wants to and deserves to be treated, why Autism is actually beautiful and powerful, and so much more. Not only is this conversation completely empowering, but it's informative and will make so many people feel seen and heard. They discuss terms like stimming, masking special interests, and how much information is lacking concerning how Autism affects girls. Share this episode with anyone whom you think would love to hear these young women (and one mom) discuss this topic in a way that is totally empowering.

Follow Chloe Hayden on all platforms under @princessaspien and visit princessaspien.com to learn more about this incredible autism advocate.

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

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During this vulnerable (but also at times light and funny) episode, Danielle and Adam discuss their very personal experiences trying for a baby, dealing with Danielle's complicated pregnancies, miscarriage,

all the lack of information they had growing up about fertility and pregnancy. Danielle discuss the very frustrating idea that pregnant women are supposed to be "glowing" and love being pregnant. As someone who greatly struggled being pregnant, this idea somehow made her feel like a failure. For anyone who has ever felt like pregnancy was way more complicated than they assumed it would be, this is an episode you do not want to miss.

Visit marriageandmartinis.com to sign up for the first Marriage and Martinis Date Night Question E-Book.

Download the Ovia Fertility, Pregnancy, and Parenting Apps or search "Ovia Health" in your App Store

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Many episodes have touched on what made Danielle originally come to Adam with the idea of starting a podcast. But never have they really gone into detail about what that night was like, what made her come up with the idea, and the events that led to them to FINALLY releasing the first episode. With zero experience and no qualifications, what made the two of them think this would ever work is completely crazy. Yet, they did it anyway. Following the release of the episode, more secrets were revealed and they had yet to really hit rock bottom. And now they had a business to think about on top of everything else. This episode uncovers all of the anxiety, bravery, fights, and secrets behind the start of the podcast, community, and brand. If you've ever considered a new venture but have no idea how to actually go through with it, this episode is a "must listen." Visit marriageandmartinis.com to sign up for our Friday Five emails and to learn about our Date Night Questions E-Book pre-order!!

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CEO Jeffrey Abraham joins Danielle and Adam in one of their most open and honest conversations about intimacy yet. Jeff, who has spent years heading Promescent, a company whose mission it is to make the bedroom a place where couples are totally free from anxiety and shame, talks about why communication is so important in relationships, why men need to open up more, and how they are committed to closing the orgasm gap. Danielle and Adam discuss personal issues and experiences they've had, and Jeffrey chimes in to remind them that all relationships can benefit from keeping an open mind and trying new things. All partners, regardless of gender, can benefit from hearing this episode. It's especially refreshing to have a male guest who is so open and forthcoming about intimacy, and so many people will relate to what Jeffrey says.

To try Promescent's products with an exclusive 15% off your first order, click here 

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Anthropologist and NYT bestselling author Dr. Wednesday Martin joins Adam and Danielle for an awesome conversation about everything from how agriculture influenced the expectations for monogamous relationships, why less emphasis needs to be put on "virginity,' how "bad science" is leading to unfair assumptions about boys and girls roles and personalities, why sex ed needs to change, and so much more. The conversation starts with talk about life 12,000 years ago and winds up as a discussion about where we need to go next in terms of altering our expectations of women as sexual beings, as well as female pleasure. To learn more about these topics, read Wednesday Martin's book, "Untrue," and listen to her podcast, "True Love and Wild Sex."

Don't forget to sign up for the Friday Five at marriageandmartinis.com to get this coming week's "Date Night Questions" corresponding to this episode.

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One part of the mental load that Danielle spoke about in episode #159 is all the emotional and physical burdens that are inherent in being born female; the expectations of just carrying on with life even though we may be suffering from exacerbated periods, issues getting pregnancy, being pregnant, losing a pregnancy, postpartum....the list goes on and on. Marriage and Martinis is starting a series delving into all these aspects of life and how they affect individuals, couples, and other close relationships. In the first episode in this series, Danielle and Adam sat down with Dr. Loree Johnson, to discuss all things related to pregnancy loss, including topics of guilt, shame, misconceptions, grief, and hopefully, healing. Dr. Loree helps people overcome the emotional challenges that come with infertility, including pregnancy loss and emotional trauma. Some issues the three of them discuss are

• How to best support someone who has experienced pregnancy loss (what to say and cliches to avoid)
• Understanding the guilt oftentimes felt by the mother after losing a pregnancy
• Why grieving a loss is natural and normal no matter how far into the pregnancy it occurs
• Why finding and working with the right doctor is absolutely essential
• Ways we grieve throughout the day that might not manifest as grief

Dr. Loree Johnson can be found at drloreejohnson.com and on instagram @drloreejohnson

Please be sure to check out our amazing episode sponsors:

Ovia Health - info.oviahealth.com/marriage or visit your lo store and search for "Ovia" to download their FREE fertility, pregnancy and parenting apps.

Silk and Sonder - https://www.silkandsonder.com promo code "Marriage" for 20% any subscription. Monthly planners that help you on your journey of self-care and clarity.

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In this episode, Danielle sits down with the amazing boudoir photographer, Evgenia Ribinik, to hear all about what it's like to be a part of such an intimate, momentous experience from the other side of the camera. The two discuss:

• How Evgenia first got into boudoir photography.
• What Evgenia wants each person who enters her studio to learn and better understand about themself.
• The different reasons why women commit to having a Boudoir shoot, and why they feel they need to have this specific experience.
• How shooting couples in this intimate manner is different from shooting a woman or women.
• Do men usually respond differently to the photo shoot, and in what ways?
• What does she want her daughters to know about her work and why it's important?
• How this journey has bonded Danielle and Evgenia in a very unique and powerful way.

To check out Evgenia's amazing work, visit her website.

Make sure to follow her on instagram at @evgeniaribinikstudios

To read Danielle's latest blog about her experience, click here.

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Danielle and Adam had a blast talking to Kim and Penn about everything from starting their business, to creating viral videos, to their most recent project, writing a book together. The two couples break down their most ridiculous fights, discuss why it's important not to hide our fights from our kids, and why it's impossible not to bring up every other past annoyance when we argue. Head to their website theholdernessfamily.com or wherever you get your books to pre-order, "Everybody Fights."

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First off, Danielle and Adam have come a long way since they recorded the first episode about the Mental Load almost two years ago. However, the progress has definitely been incremental, and they still have work to do. What starts out as a calm conversation quickly turns defensive and competitive as they list off responsibilities, stresses, emotional tolls, and physical hardships they each endure in life and parenting. Danielle does not understand how Adam can possibly think they are 50/50 household, and despite absolutely no scientific data to back up the idea that women are somehow better equipped to care for their kids and family, Adam feels like there definitely must be some truth in this longstanding societal norm. When things get heated, the couple pauses the mics and proceeds to speak privately, and then comes back to finish the conversation. Danielle breaks down into tears, proving that while they have definitely made strides, it's still an extremely sensitive topic in their marriage. Ultimately, the two realize that there is more work to be done, and another episode will need to be recorded to update everyone on their progress. If you are looking for more Mental Load episodes, download #56, #108 and #137. Don't forget to head to marriageandmartinis.com to get the corresponding Mental Load "Date Night Questions," and to sign up for all future questions in the "Friday Five" email.

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After the overwhelming response to their first episode with Jodie Utter from last February, Danielle and Adam finally had the chance to continue their conversation with her. Where is she now in her journey of healing and forgiveness after her husband's infidelity? Is she able to trust again? How does she deal with the inevitable feelings of pain that come flooding back at any given moment? Is self-forgiveness harder than forgiving someone else? What advice does she have for others going through a similar situation? This is a must-listen for anyone who has dealt with any form of betrayal, not just infidelity. Jodie provides us all with a feeling of hope, understanding, acceptance, and peace. She is gentle, incredibly vulnerable, honest, and reveals all in her quest for no one to feel alone during their healing process. It is important to note that listeners definitely should listen to her episode from February, 2019 in order to hear the first part of her story.

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One of the most common messages Danielle and Adam receive from listeners is that they and their partner mismatched libidos. Truthfully, 80% of couples experience one partner having a higher libido than the other. We all think that we're the only ones struggling with this, and we tend to take it personally when our partner isn't in the mood as often (or ever). But there are so many misconceptions and myths surrounding sex drives and compatibility. This episode breaks down some of those misconceptions, and sheds light on the issues in Danielle and Adam's own marriage that have led to little or no sex over extended periods of time.

Make sure you sign up for the "Friday Five" to get this week's corresponding Date Night Questions at marriageandmartinis.com

Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here. Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off.

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We are taught from a young age that doing for others is what makes us good, generous people. We are conditioned to say "yes" even when we're faced with something we really don't want to do. Obhave overtaken so many of our lives, that we have run out of time to do the things that truly matter to us. Our dreams and goals have been put on hold. But HOW do we say no? What's holding us back and how can we overcome it? "Recovering People Pleaser," Natalie Lue talks us through why we need to stop associating "saying yes" with "goodness" and "generosity." She also walks us through her famous practice of "unsent letters" and why this is a tool that can cleanse us all from so much of our baggage. If you are looking to lighten your load and reclaim your time and value, then you definitely want to listen to this episode.

Follow Natalie Lue on instagram @natlue

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Adam and Danielle have had some week, between Adam working 24/7 and the kids being off from school and trapped in the house due to snow. Let's just say there wasn't a ton of prep time for this episode, but sometimes being unprepared can lead to some serious laughs and unplanned hilarity. That is exactly what happens in this episode. Adam and Danielle start off with some innocent conversation about a few recent episodes and some listener's messages and questions. Things go south really fast though when Danielle and Adam have to give each other compliments they've never told one another in the spirit of Valentine's Day. Why did Danielle apologize to Adam? For what sexual act does Danielle say Adam is impressively focused, despite usually having a very short attention span? What compliment is Adam hesitant to give Danielle? Buckle up, because this episode takes all kinds of unforeseen turns and is definitely sprinkled with some unplanned inappropriate commentary.

Head to marriageandmartinis.com to sign up for this Friday's special Valentine's Day "Date Night Questions."

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Danielle and Adam could have kept talking to Bryde and twelve hours. They had so much to ask them, and the conversation just kept evolving and branching off into so many different directions. They discuss being a poly couple who is very curious, adventurous, and open-minded. What was their journey from monogamy to polyamory? How have they kept their jealousy in check? How has Jeremie's chronic illness affected decisions about their relationship? Why they live in separate houses and what is that like? How did upbringing affect their sexual identities? This conversation is as interesting as it is important, and it will answer a lot of questions many people have concerning some more "unconventional" lifestyles. Check out Bryde and Jeremie on their podcast, "Turn Me On."

Subscribe to our email at marriageandmartinis.com to get the corresponding date night questions to this episode.

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Note: This is episode is just two people sitting down to try to get acquainted with kinks and fetishes. This episode will be followed up by several others with experts as well as couples who are already immersed in the kink culture. Adam and Danielle are open about the fact that they sometimes participate in kink-adjacent activities. However, there is a whole world out there about which they know very little and would like to become more comfortable with so that it can be spoken about and experienced without share, guilt, or embarrassment.

• A brief history of kinks
• The differences in the two terms, kinks and fetishes
• What are some things couples can do just to spice things up a bit if they don't want to get too risque
• some kinks or fetishes they would be interested in
• "Hard no's" for both of them
• Why is there so much shame surrounding the topics
• How do we make our partners become confident enough to try new, exciting acts in the bedroom

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So many of us are feeling like we have hit the "pandemic wall." We're exhausted, emotionally drained, and we're surrounded by our kids 24/7. Living in sweatpants and never getting a proper date night can definitely take its toll on romance, and at the end of the day, we just want to fall into bed and not be bothered. Sex and intimacy coach Leah Carey helps Danielle and Adam understand what baby steps we can take to bring that connection back, and try to keep the frustration and distance we feel with our partners down to a minimum until life resumes as we once knew it (or as close to that as possible). We discuss how medication, alcohol, job loss, and monetary worries are all affecting people's sex drive. It's definitely normal, and it's happening to more couples than you think. This is definitely one of those very relatable episodes, and as always, Danielle and Adam are completely honest about the state of things and how they might be willing to take steps to change them.

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Sign up for Leah's Girls Talk about Sex PJ party at Leahcarey.com

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(SKIP AHEAD TO 17:45 TO HEAR JUST THE ADVICE PORTION OF THE EPISODE) If there's one thing Adam and Danielle make very clear all the time, it's that they are not experts in pretty much anything. However, on this episode, Adam and Danielle first discuss their own history with therapy, and then they take a chance and answer listeners questions about certain issues with marriage and life. Using their own twenty years of experience in marriage, the two of them try their best to give insight on physical connection, in-law relationships, fetishes, and dealing with stubborn spouses. While everything they say should be taken with a grain of salt, Adam and Danielle loved having the opportunity to dive in and give a husband/wife perspective on issues that affect tons of couples. This is something they will definitely be doing more often on the podcast.

To submit your own questions about marriage, parenting, or life in general to Adam and Danielle, send an email with the subject "Dear Abby" to marriageandmartinis@gmail.com

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This year has been such insanity that there really is no way to even explain it. However, Danielle and Adam sit down to dissect and discuss it all in the style of which only the two of them are really capable. After 12 months of sheer chaos, we're all feeling emotionally and physically depleted. But that doesn't mean there aren't plenty of laughs to be had when we really think about how inexplicable it all really is. Sit back and start 2021 with a chuckle, a feeling of pride, hopefulness, and maybe even some gratitude after all we've been through.

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Original Airdate: October 21, 2019

It's incredible how the roles and careers we choose to partake in as adults turn out to be nothing like we expected, and how little we were warned what is truly involved in life at work and at home. In this episode, Danielle discusses how shocking it is that being a stay-at-home-mom is not at all how she pictured it, and she's constantly feeling like a failure because she's terrible at the aspects of being a "homemaker" that she never thought about. She also discusses how she spent years being a high school teacher, and that job too came with so many unexpected responsibilities that they don't warn you about when getting your degree. Adam discusses the physical aspects of being an adult that are beginning to wear him down, and the shocks of parenting that are still thrown at him all the time. On the other hand, Danielle and Adam talk all about the awesome things involved in being "grown-ups" and how cool it is to have the freedom that comes with getting older. No matter your role or career, if you ever feel like you had no freaking clue what was coming your way, you'll definitely want to listen to this episode.

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TRIGGER WARNING: This episode discusses alcohol and other substances. If this is a topic that is sensitive or triggering to you, please skip this one.

Adam and Danielle both have a history with indulgence, and sometimes can tip the scale to the excess when it comes to having a good time and living life to the fullest. This episode explores the unhealthy behaviors in which so many of us partake, because they make us feel better and can often lead to great nights and memories. But of course they all come with a price, AKA. the next day (or four, depending on your age). Adam and Danielle discuss some of these behaviors and how they've impacted their lives, and also polled their community to find out about their favorite indulgences in life. They also discuss obscure but popular hangover cures, some interesting facts and stats about alcohol, and Danielle reveals why she feels she has been overlooked as a prodigy in life. While obviously some of these can become serious issues and Adam and Danielle have covered the more serious sides of these substances and indulgences in the past, this episode explores more the lighter, jovial aspects indulgence. This is a great episode in which to listen while you are running around for the holidays and need a stress reliever.

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