We asked for your questions over at that handle we hate on Instagram, and you delivered! In this episode: The Kinkery is having a sale through Labor Day! JB’s vanilla Etsy shop “sponsored” us,...

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We’re a bit late to our own party, but we’re celebrating our 9th podcast anniversary! We’re sharing things we’ve learned, discovered, and figured out about ourselves and our power exchange relationship after nine years...

The post Things We’ve Learned About Power Exchange in Nine Years of Podcasting appeared first on Loving BDSM.

A submissive has gone through a lot with their Dominant partner with consent violations, a broken D/s agreement, and just being made to feel awful. And they want to know if it’s possible to...

The post Q&A: How Do I Trust My Dom Again? appeared first on Loving BDSM.

This week, things get a bit heavy as we discuss our (ongoing) experiences with depression as a Dom and sub in a power exchange relationship. We don’t get into too many details but if...

The post Our Experience with D/s and Depression appeared first on Loving BDSM.

A post on Reddit got us talking about topping from the bottom…seven years after the first time we talked about it! While a lot of the sentiments are the same, this is a different...

The post Topping from the Bottom | Revisiting Old Episodes appeared first on Loving BDSM.

We’re using quotes in the title for a reason, y’all! Is the Bible Belt kinkier than most people probably realize? Absolutely! Does this survey prove that? Ehhhhhh….let’s talk about it. In this episode We...

The post Survey “Reveals” How Kinky the Bible Belt Is appeared first on Loving BDSM.

In this week’s episode, we’re taking a question we received in a previous Q&A and expanding it to a full conversation. The question: How do I figure out my kink style and identity? These...

The post Figuring Out Your Kinky Self appeared first on Loving BDSM.

We’ve discussed aspects of sensation play – pain, wax, electroplay – many times in the past, but we’ve never discussed the broader topic of sensation play. Until now! Is this fully comprehensive? Of course...

The post Sensation Play appeared first on Loving BDSM.

In this week’s episode, we take “silly but serious” questions posed by a therapist on social media and answer them from the perspective of our long-term D/s relationship. In this episode: Register for the...

The post Answering Silly But Serious Relationship Questions appeared first on Loving BDSM.

We needed an easy one this week – as we’re both still recovering from being sick – so we went with a response to questions asked on the BDSM side of Reddit. In this...

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This week’s episode is similar to other episodes in the archive but with a twist. Yes, we’re talking about what we’ve learned over the years but with a focus on how we’ve changed and,...

The post How We’ve Evolved in BDSM and D/s appeared first on Loving BDSM.

JB said he wanted to stream/record but that, and he wasn’t “firing on all cylinders.” So we turned this week’s into a big (to us) announcement and a bonus section episode. In this episode:...

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We’ve teased this topic over the past several weeks, and we’re finally getting to it – the division of labor in your home and family while you also try to live your best D/s...

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A moment when Kayla admitted wrongdoing has us thinking about the concept of “radical honesty” which potentially has a deeper meaning for kinksters in general. In this episode Register for the free and online...

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It’s the first episode of 2023 so we’re sharing our personal and professional goals and plans for the year! This episode actually focuses more on the personal side – both as individuals and our...

The post Our 2023 Plans and Goals appeared first on Loving BDSM.

For this last episode before we take a couple of weeks off, we’re responding to questions and situations shared on the BDSM side of Reddit. And yes, there are rants in this one. In...

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We asked for your questions over at that handle we fucking hate on Instagram, and y’all delivered! We got so many we couldn’t answer them all! If you have BDSM-related questions for us, we...

The post BDSM Q&A appeared first on Loving BDSM.

Ten years ago from the time we recorded this week’s episode, we were “meeting” each other through blog comments. On December 23, it will be ten years since our first conversation. Next year, we’ll...

The post What We’ve Learned After a Decade Together appeared first on Loving BDSM.

It’s that time of year again — time to talk about the sex toys we’ve loved this year, plus some Black Friday sales and specials. Because no one should pay full price for fuckery,...

The post Our Favorite Sex Toys of 2022 appeared first on Loving BDSM.

This week is a bit different but something we’ve wanted to do a while. Our dear friend, Professor Sex, finished their thesis several months ago and generously allowed us to discuss their work on...

The post Research on Kink Behavior vs. Kink Identity appeared first on Loving BDSM.

The topic of toxic masculinity — in power exchange and kink or not — is a huge one. But as with all of these conversations, we have to start somewhere. In this week’s episode,...

The post Toxic Masculinity in Power Exchange | A Dominant’s Perspective appeared first on Loving BDSM.

Spoiler: This episode is about sex, and it’s a TMI episode about the two of us, our sexual fantasies, turn-ons, and more. If that’s more than you want to hear, feel free to skip...

The post Answering Spicy Questions appeared first on Loving BDSM.

We mentioned something in last week’s episode on people-pleasing — about needing to talk to JB about a stressor Kayla tried to handle alone — and it got us thinking about the things we...

The post Sharing Burdens in Power Exchange appeared first on Loving BDSM.

People pleasing happens for a lot of reasons, and it manifests in a lot of ways. We’re talking about it this week, specifically as it relates to power exchange and D/s, based (primarily) on...

The post People Pleasing in Power Exchange appeared first on Loving BDSM.

A submissive who was once the Dominant in their power exchange wants to add their Dom energy back to the dynamic but isn’t sure how to talk to their partner about it. Here’s the...

The post Q&A: How Do I Tell My Partner I Want to Switch? appeared first on Loving BDSM.

We’ve talked about intimacy before — link below — but this time, a post on Instagram gave me (Kayla) some specific examples of intimacy beyond the obvious. Also, yes, this is a solo episode...

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This week’s episode was recorded while we waited for Hurricane Ian, so it’s more chaotic than usual. Also, we took help from kinksters over on Instagram. We asked, “What do you wish people (including...

The post What Kinksters Want Others to Stop Getting Wrong About Kink appeared first on Loving BDSM.

This week, we’re reacting (or responding) to the BDSM questions asked on Reddit! In this episode: Live Stream/Virtual Munch this Friday, September 16! We’re taking next week off. Reacting/responding to BDSM questions from Reddit...

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This week, we answered listener questions about a variety of topics: masochism, kinky bucket lists, non-monogamy, and more! In this episode: Our first scene experience Where are all the middles? How do we deal...

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This week, let’s talk about voice kinks: what are they and do we have any? In this episode: Defining voice kinks What we like about voices Do we have a voice kink? Thanks to...

The post Voice Kinks appeared first on Loving BDSM.

This week, we’re talking about anger, upset, and other negative feelings specifically in terms of submission. How do you submit when you’re angry at your Dom? The answer is…it depends. In this episode: Want...

The post Submitting While Angry or Upset appeared first on Loving BDSM.

This week, we get personal — more than usual — and have a formal check-in of our D/s relationship. We tend to do this on a frequent and casual basis, bringing up concerns or...

The post Checking in on Our D/s Relationship appeared first on Loving BDSM.

In this week’s podcast, we discuss the term “service top” — and there are a lot of ways to define it! In this episode: Multiple definitions of service top What it means to us...

The post What is a Service Top? appeared first on Loving BDSM.

We (kind of) get where this question comes from — submissives are seen to bend to the will of their Dominant partner, submissive training and behavior modification are tools used in some D/s relationships....

The post Does a Submissive Have to Change in D/s? appeared first on Loving BDSM.

In this week’s episode, we took questions from Instagram and then from the YouTube live chat. Plus, the bonus section actually has bonus content about our power exchange. (Proving miracles can happen.) In this...

The post BDSM Q&A appeared first on Loving BDSM.

External (extrinsic) motivation is about doing something because of outside expectations – your partner set a task, you were asked to do something, etc. It might be something you know needs to be done,...

The post Needing External Motivation in Power Exchange appeared first on Loving BDSM.

We’re back with another BDSM Reddit reaction episode! And for once, the answer to all of these posts was something other than, “Talk to your partner!” In this episode: Why the podcast was late...

The post BDSM Reddit Reaction appeared first on Loving BDSM.

A term keeps popping up in Kayla’s feeds: conscious kink. But what does that even mean? Is it a new way of thinking about BDSM or is it a catch-all term used in marketing?...

The post What is Conscious Kink? appeared first on Loving BDSM.

It might seem like a random topic but the joy we’ve felt (at times) in our power exchange is so powerful and amazing that it’s important to acknowledge. And also, we can’t be the...

The post Joy in D/s Relationships appeared first on Loving BDSM.

In this week’s episode, we talk about the label “alpha sub” — how it was defined when we first heard of it and what it means to many people today. In this episode: Thanks...

The post What is an Alpha Sub? appeared first on Loving BDSM.

John Brownstone posed an interesting question when thinking about power exchange relationships and new potential partners: What do you bring to the table as a kinkster and just as a person? So that’s what...

The post What Do You Bring to the Table? appeared first on Loving BDSM.

A listener sent us a question about telling the difference between love bombing and being an eager caregiver type with new relationship energy (NRE). We decided to talk about love bombing, ideas for figuring...

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This week, we’re revisiting a topic we talked about back in 2019: teamwork in power exchange. The conversation focuses on a book we recently read specifically on the idea of having a dynamic built...

The post Collaboration and Teamwork appeared first on Loving BDSM.

Not every power exchange relationship needs (or wants!) an element of discipline, punishment, and consequences. But for those who do, there are a lot of things to keep in mind. This week, we’re sharing...

The post Minisode 56: Punishment Tips appeared first on Loving BDSM.

This week we’re talking about something near and dear to our experience — perfectionism, and how it can impact your power exchange relationship and you as a kinkster, regardless of your role. In this...

The post Perfectionism in Power Exchange appeared first on Loving BDSM.

We’re baaaaa-aaaaaack…and we’re trying to get back into a groove, both for the podcast and in our D/s relationship. This week’s episode is more like a giant bonus section with updates about where we’ve...

The post Getting Back Into a Groove appeared first on Loving BDSM.

We’ve experienced “task creep” – the act of taking on tasks/routines that weren’t specifically negotiated. Thankfully for us, we figured it out quickly and worked it out in a quick conversation. But like job...

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As you may know, JB has been pulled away from home and work to help take care of his ailing mom. It means he’s not at home as much, and he’s under a lot...

The post Our Power Exchange During Times of Stress appeared first on Loving BDSM.

Subspace is just one experience submissives can have during a kink scene. As we’ve discussed before, subspace isn’t a guarantee for every scene, and some people may never even get there. So let’s talk...

The post Minisode 55: Beyond Subspace appeared first on Loving BDSM.

We’re back with another response (reaction?) to questions asked over on the BDSM side of Reddit. In this episode: This week’s episode is sponsored by Beducated. Answering questions on BDSM reddit. Thanks to our...

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