Explore every episode of the podcast Locker Room - A Southland Christian Church Podcast

Big things are coming this fall for the men of Southland!

In this episode of the Locker Room Podcast, Scott Hatfield shares several ways to connect, grow and lead—including Fight Club at the Richmond Campus, new Fight Club resources for leading your own group and an upcoming Marriage Workshop.

Scott also honors the life of his friend Rob Preston, whose courageous faith throughout his battle with ALS offers a powerful reminder to live intentionally, share the hope of Jesus and finish well.

Upcoming events:

• Fight Club at the Richmond Campus
Begins August 31 | Mondays from 7–9 p.m.
Register: https://southland.church/groups

• Fight Club Leader Interest Meeting
August 10 | 7–8 p.m.
Nicholasville Campus, Building B

• Fight Club Table Leader Training
August 17 | 7–8:30 p.m.
Richmond Campus

• Marriage Workshop
November 6–7
Register: https://southland.church/marriage

Interested in leading a Fight Club group or learning more? Email shatfield@southland.church.

Please join us in praying for Rob's family and for his Celebration of Life service on August 21.

"I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith." — 2 Timothy 4:7

Locker Room, let's fight the good fight, finish the race and keep the faith. What we do, how we invest, how we model and what we say matters. Let's build something that lasts beyond us.

Our guest this week is James Dickey, a long time servant leader at Southland. James' mentality in life is "This is all about you Jesus, what do you want me to do? What do you want me to give?—the answer is yes." James has gotten to be a part of some really amazing God moments because he's stacked up a bunch of yes's, and trusted God to lead him into new opportunities.

There's nothing better than a man who stays available to Jesus. Our greatest ability is our availability.

This episode wraps up this season of the podcast. Keep fighting and looking for ways to be available this summer to the opportunities God puts in your path to serve and love on others. Have a great summer and we'll catch you back here in August for Season 17 of Locker Room.

---

Opening Questions

• Where are you winning this week?

Discussion Questions:

James has stayed faithful serving at the same church through a lot of different seasons and leadership changes. 

• What do you think helps a man stay grounded and committed instead of constantly chasing something new?

Hearing James talk about serving on the Prayer Team was powerful because he's walked with people through some really heavy moments. 

• Why do you think so many men avoid stepping into hard or emotional conversations?

One of the biggest themes from this episode was just being available to God. 

• What tends to compete for or crowd out your availability to the Lord?

James kept faithfully showing up for Jeep year after year before he ever saw life change happen. 

• Have you ever gotten frustrated, spiritually gave up somebody or stop engaging with someone because they didn't seem interested in Jesus?  

• How does James 26-27 years of just showing up at the prison to keep loving "Jeep" remind us about the power of God to move in someone's life? 

• Who do you need to do to re-engage with that God's not given up on? 

Read Luke 4:18-19. 

• How do these verses challenge the way we think about serving and loving people around us? 

• What is one practical way you can live this out this week?

James saying "yes" to God eventually led to him giving away one of his kidneys — something he probably never could've imagined when he first started following Jesus.

• How does his story challenge the way we think about obedience, sacrifice, and trusting God with whatever He asks of us?

James and Kathy walked through a lot of health struggles together. 

• What stood out to you most about the way they approached marriage and hardship? 

• What can you apply to your own marriage or future relationships?

"Things you can change, change. Things you can't change, let go and let God." This quote is hard, but there is a lot of truth to it. 

• Why is surrender so difficult for most men? 

• Have you walked through a situation where you had to fully trust God with something you couldn't control?

• What is one thing that you need to surrender today?

Toward the end, Scott challenged men to make their default answer to God "yes." 

• What is one area of your life where saying "yes" to God feels difficult right now?

After listening to this episode, what's one thing we haven't touched on that stuck out to you? 

• How can you apply that takeaway to your life this week?

Wrap Up:

• If this podcast has encouraged you—we'd love to hear from you. 

• If you're wrestling with Christianity, interested in getting baptized or need help figuring out your next step…shoot us an email at lockerroom@southland.church.  

• As always…if this podcast has encouraged you—share it with a friend.  You never know how an episode like this can help those in your life that you care about.

• Thanks for listening.  Get after it!  We'll catch you next time on Locker Room.

Our topic this week is incredibly important—healthy communication. It's important in a dating relationship, and It's important in a marriage.  If there's a skill every relationship should be working on, it's learning how to better communicate with each other.

Join us this week as we sit down with our guests Nate and Stefany Head to talk about how we can work together to build healthy communication into the bedrock of our relationships.

--

Opening Questions 

• Where are you winning this week?

• Last week we talked about finances. What step did you take this past week to be better financially in your marriage?

DISCUSSION:

Nate talks about wanting to "win" arguments and mentions having an inner lawyer that wants to prove his point.

• Why do you think many of us approach disagreements like something we need to win?

• How can focusing on understanding instead of winning change the way we communicate with our spouse?

Stef talks about being on the opposite side of the spectrum in how she communicates.

• How do different communication styles show up in your marriage?

• How can differences in personality actually strengthen a marriage instead of hurting it?

Scott talks about the idea that things naturally move toward disorder unless intentional effort is applied.

• Where do you see this happening most easily in marriage?

• What are some intentional habits you are working on to keep your marriage healthy and connected?

Nate talks about how couples must fight for time together. 

• What are some ways your schedule currently makes connection difficult? 

• What is one practical change you could make this week to protect time with your spouse?

Scott says that no one is naturally a great listener—it's a skill that must be developed.

• What makes listening difficult during conflict or emotional conversations?

• What are some practices that have helped you become a better listener?

Stef talks about never speaking negatively about your spouse to other people, even jokingly.

• Why can "joking complaints" about our spouse be harmful to our marriage?

• How can we intentionally build a habit of honoring our spouse with our words, even when they aren't around?

Nate talks about the importance of resolving conflict instead of ignoring it.

• Why do people often avoid difficult conversations in marriage?

• What are healthy ways to address conflict before resentment builds?

"Little and consistent deposits are better than big and inconsistent ones." How can you be more consistent with the small things?

 What is one major takeaway from this episode that you want to apply to your marriage?

Wrap Up:

• If this podcast has encouraged you, we'd love to hear from you. 

• If you're wrestling with Christianity, interested in getting baptized or need help figuring out your next step…shoot us an email at lockerroom@southland.church.  

• As always…if this podcast has encouraged you—share it with a friend.  You never know how an episode like this can help those in your life that you care about.

• Thanks for listening.  Get after it!  We'll catch you next time on Locker Room.

Healthy Rhythms

Jesus had the habit of getting alone with the Father and then being with people. Over and over again, we see Him withdraw to the wilderness to pray and connect with the Father. He had this rhythm of connecting with the Father (filling his tank) and then spending time with people (pouring out from the well of His time with God).

We have to realize that we're not God. We have limits. But if we will fight to protect our relationship with Jesus, and we will love ourselves enough to take care of our bodies, we'll be healthier men and stronger men. Then we'll be able to invest in our families, relationships, work and kingdom stuff that God calls us to be a part of.

Join us in this episode of Locker Room as we circle up with Scott Nickell and Jon Weece to talk about two words: Healthy Rhythms.

LOCKER ROOM DISCUSSION GUIDE S10 E15 - "Two Words: Healthy Rhythms"

We all have at least 1 or 2 weird habits. What's one of yours?

Would you describe yourself as a disciplined person? Why or why not?

It's been said "If Satan can't make you bad, he'll make you busy." How do we proactively fight against being busy? What does it mean to have healthy rhythms?

Read Proverbs 4:23, Jeremiah 17:9, and Ephesians 5:15-16. Why is it crucial for us to be vigilant about how we're doing and how we're living?

Read Genesis 1:1-2:3. Boundaries, order, and structure are recurring themes throughout the Creation account. It's also noteworthy that God rested on the 7th day. Why do you think God rested? Furthermore, why did God wait until after He created Adam and Eve to rest?

Read 1 Timothy 4:7-8, 2 Timothy 3:16-17, Matthew 6:5-6, and Matthew 6:16-18. Spiritual disciplines are not transactional behaviors serving as a report card or scoreboard in order to get something from God; spiritual disciplines are practices to help us build a transformational relationship with God and with others. What spiritual disciplines are you currently implementing (studying Scripture, prayer, fasting, etc.)? Which one(s) could you begin to prioritize? How do we guard against becoming self-righteous or ritualistic in this area?

Read 1 Corinthians 6:19-20, 1 Corinthians 9:24-27, Romans 12:1, and Hebrews 4:9-11. We're most vulnerable when we're angry, bored, hungry, lonely, or tired. What physical rhythms are you currently implementing (eating, exercise, sleep, etc.)? Which one(s) could you begin to prioritize? How do we guard against these becoming idols?

Read Proverbs 18:24, Matthew 14:23, John 13:34-35, and Colossians 3:23-24. Jesus had rhythms of engaging with others and withdrawing for solitude with God. What relational or social rhythms are you currently implementing (family, friends, fun, solitude, work, etc.)? Which one(s) could you begin to prioritize? How do we establish better rhythms with work and family life?

Read Proverbs 1:7, Proverbs 3:5-6, and James 3:13-18. When has an unhealthy rhythm cost you? What did you learn? Think of a season when you felt closest to God and to others? What rhythms did you have in place?

Read Romans 12:2, Philippians 1:9-10, and James 1:5. All good things aren't necessarily God things. We need to filter our activities and responsibilities through "good," "better," and "best." Look at your calendar for this month and work through the following Stoplight Tool:

   Green light - What do you need to continue doing?

   Yellow light - What do you need to change or tweak?

   Red light - What do you need to stop doing or take off your plate? 

The Book

Many of us own a copy. In fact, the stats say 85% of U.S. households have a Bible, and the average house has 4.3 Bibles. The problem with that stat is this: just because you have one doesn't mean that you're using it! So why is this book important? What is the point?

The point of the Bible is to know God and to understand His ways.

God could have easily simply created us and said, "Well, I hope you find me." Instead, He gave us His Word. It's a gift. It's a love letter from God to us—written with precision and purpose—so that we can know Him and know His heart for us and His heart for the world.

In this episode of Locker Room we're going to hit the fundamentals of how to get into God's Word and make it part of our daily lives.

LOCKER ROOM DISCUSSION GUIDE S10E14 - Two Words: The Book

Would you classify yourself as a reader? Why or why not? If so, what's one of your favorite books?

When you hear the phrase "the Bible," what's the first thought that comes to mind? Who introduced you to the Bible, and what was their approach?

Read Joshua 1:8, Psalm 1:2, and Acts 17:10-11. Physically speaking, the majority of us wouldn't eat one meal each week and expect it to sustain us over time. Why is it difficult for us to view our spiritual nourishment from this same perspective?

How would you describe your experience with reading and studying the Bible? What are some of the barriers you've encountered that hinder your ability to make it a part of your daily rhythm? 
Which stories or books of the Bible do you naturally connect with? Why? Which passages are the most challenging or intimidating to read? Why?

Read Psalm 119:9-11, Matthew 7:24-27, and John 8:31-32. We are all being formed or shaped by something or someone to develop our worldview. If you were to take an honest inventory of your daily input (books, music, podcasts, radio shows, television, etc.), what would you say is currently shaping your worldview? How does this align with having a Biblical worldview?

Read John 17:17, Hebrews 4:12, and Revelation 22:18-19. We all have a temptation to read the Bible with a highlighter in one hand and a pair of scissors in the other. Which of the following do you tend to wrestle with the most as it relates to reading and studying the Bible:

   - Is it true?

   - Is it loving?

   - Is it God's best for me?

   - Can I trust Him?

Read 2 Timothy 3:14-17, Romans 12:2, and James 1:22-25. The purpose of reading the Bible is to help us grow in our relationship with God so that we can live out our faith in real, tangible ways. Simply stated, we read for transformation not just information. How has reading and studying the Bible transformed your life?  
What strategies or tools have you implemented when reading and studying the Bible? How would you encourage someone who is beginning their journey?

Scott mentioned the SOAP method (Scripture, Observation, Application, Prayer) as one potential approach to reading and studying the Bible. Using this strategy, commit to the 20/20 challenge he referenced (20 verses for 20 minutes) over the course of this week.

Hate Sin (part 2)

Each of us are in a daily battle of choosing, "Am I going to live my day walking in what God has for me through Christ—am I going to live for Jesus? Or am I going to be dominated by my past sin, past shame, or sinful desires?"

We have to know ourselves. We have to know our history. We have to remember where we've been and study our own game tape knowing what brings joy and what brings heartache and shame.

Join us this week as we jump back into the two words: Hate Sin.

LOCKER ROOM DISCUSSION GUIDE: S10 E13 - Two Words: Hate Sin (Part 2)

What was your main takeaway from the previous episode? Do you view sin any differently? Why or why not?

Read Isaiah 53:1-12, Romans 3:21-26, and 1 Corinthians 7:23. God hated sin so much, He sent Jesus on a rescue mission to reconcile us back to Him which came at a great cost. God's grace and mercy should elicit a response from us. If we're able to move this unfathomable truth from our heads to our hearts, how should this radically change the way we live? What hinders our ability to believe?

Read Romans 6:23, 2 Corinthians 5:17-21, and Ephesians 2:3-5. As you reflect on your journey with Jesus, what are 1 or 2 major areas in your life where you've witnessed significant change or growth? Some sources say the word "remember" is repeated over 200 times in the Bible. Why do you think this is significant?

Read Jeremiah 29:13, Matthew 7:7-8, and Philippians 3:13-16. If you were to reflect on your journey following Jesus, what did you have to leave behind? Did you do this with an open hand or a closed fist? How would you encou rage someone in a similar season?

Which of the following ways to hate sin come naturally for you? Which do you still have room to grow?

  - Living self-aware (1 Corinthians 10:12-13, James 1:13-15, 1 Peter 5:8)

  - Staying on guard (Proverbs 4:23, 1 Corinthians 16:13, Ephesians 6:10-20)

  - Checking desires (Jeremiah 17:9, 1 Peter 2:10-11, Psalm 37:4)

  - Being rooted in God's Word (Psalm 1:1-6, Psalm 119:105, Hebrews 4:12)

  - Walking with the Holy Spirit (Galatians 5:13-26)

  - Choosing integrity over opportunity (Genesis 39:1-23, Romans 12:9, 1 Peter 3:13-17)

Listen to the song Graves Into Gardens and reflect on the following questions:

  - Is God better?

  - Is He good, and does He want what's best for me regardless of what the world says?

  - Is what He offers me better than the sin that I struggle with?

  - Does my love for God move me to really despise all sin, including the sin that I struggle with, because He's good Father?    

Hate Sin (Part 1)

How does God view sin? How does He see it? When God thinks about sin, what are His feelings?

God hates sin so much and He hates what it's done to His creation. He hates what it does to people's hearts, relationships, marriages, families and communities. He hates what it does to His Church. He hates how it falls out in people's lives.

What about us? Sometimes we don't really hate sin…we just hate everybody else's sin. We've grown way too comfortable with the sin that we commit. Or maybe we're in the middle of habitual sin where it feels like there's no way out: we can't resist it, and we don't have the ability to fight or be victorious over it.

This week we'll dive into what God's word says about sin and its effects in our lives.

LOCKER ROOM DISCUSSION GUIDE S10 E12:Two Words: Hate Sin (Part 1)

What's one food you hated eating as a kid? Is this a food you eat today?

How has your appetite changed over the years? What would you attribute to this change?

Read Romans 6:5-14. When we become followers of Jesus, our appetite or desire for sin should change. In the podcast, Scott said, "Sometimes, I think we don't really hate sin." Do you agree with this statement? Why or why not?

Read Romans 3:22-24, James 4:17, and 1 John 1:5-10. One definition of sin is an archery term that means "to miss the mark." When we sin, we miss the mark of God's standard. How would you describe your attitude towards sin in general? More specifically, do you have the tendency to categorize or rank different types of sin (e.g. murder vs. lying)? What about sins of commission vs. sins of omission as Scott described?

Read Proverbs 6:16-19, Romans 6:19-23, and 1 John 3:4-6. Scripture is clear about God's attitude towards sin. One of the primary reasons God hates sin is the consequences of sin separate us from Him rather than setting us apart from the world. How does God's attitude towards sin compare to what we see in culture? How do we live in the tension of being in the world but not of the world?

Read Proverbs 26:11, Proverbs 28:13, and James 5:16. Sin will take us further than we want to go, keep us there longer than we ever wanted to stay, and cost us far more than we ever thought. Take out a sheet of paper or use the notes app on your phone to list any unrepentant sin currently in your life. Pray for God to give you the courage to confess this to another trusted follower of Jesus.

You're Qualified (part 2)

You have a story. God doesn't want you to hide your story, but get comfortable with it and—when the opportunity arises—share it. When we choose to follow Christ, we become billboards of God's grace and God's hope. Your story is one of your greatest weapons.

Jump back in with us this week as we continue the discussion on the two words: You're Qualified.

LOCKER ROOM DISCUSSION GUIDE S10E11: You're Qualified (Part 2)

What was your main takeaway from the previous episode? After listening to the episode, have you become more or less confident in God's ability to use you? Why?

At Southland, we encourage our congregation to live With Jesus, In Community, and On Mission or what we refer to as "The Triangle." Read Mark 10:42-45, Philippians 2:3-4, and 1 Peter 4:10. One of the ways we can live "on mission" is by serving inside or outside the church. What does serving look like for you during this season? What have you learned from the experience? If you've not been able to serve, what barriers have you encountered?

Read Proverbs 3:27, John 3:16, and 2 Corinthians 9:6-8. Another way we can live "on mission" is by giving our time, talent, or treasure to others. What does giving look like for you during this season? What have you learned from the experience? If you've not been able to give, what barriers have you encountered?

Read Matthew 5:14-16, 1 Peter 3:15-16, and Colossians 4:5-6. A third way we can live "on mission" is by sharing our testimony or what God has done in our life with others. What does sharing look like for you during this season? What have you learned from the experience? If you've not been able to share, what barriers have you encountered?

Read 2 Corinthians 3:2-6. William J. Toms paraphrased this passage when he famously said, "Be careful how you live; you may be the only Bible some people ever read." If someone were to "read'' your life, what conclusions would they draw?

Grab a sheet of paper and create a Venn diagram using the following 3 circles:
     Ability → What gifts or talents has God equipped you with?
     Affinity → Where has God naturally hardwired your heart to find joy?
     Affirmation → How has God directly or indirectly confirmed this through His word, through prayer, or through other followers of Jesus?

*Where these 3 circles intersect is most likely your spiritual gift. Pray for God to reveal where you may have margin during this season to utilize this gift for His Kingdom. Connect with someone at your local church to discuss next steps.

You're Qualified (Part 1)

God uses broken people. That's all He has. God doesn't call the equipped; He equips the called. Jesus desires for you to partner with Him to live your life on mission. Too often we think God is looking for the powerful, the affluent, the charismatic—people with dynamic personalities. We think God is looking for ability and what He's really looking for is availability. He will equip available men who are willing to take a step and follow Him.

Join Scott and returning guest Connor Hall as they discuss how each of us are qualified to be a part of God's team and make a difference in the lives of our families, friends, and coworkers.

LOCKER ROOM DISCUSSION GUIDE: S10E10 You're Qualified (Part 1)

What was your first job or the first team you were a part of? Did you feel qualified? Why or why not?

What do you think makes someone qualified for a position or role? Why did you choose your response?

Read Nehemiah 1:11-2:5. Nehemiah was a cupbearer in modern-day Iran who felt a burden or call to construction in Jerusalem. If we read the stories of other people who were called by God in the Old Testament (Noah, Moses, Rahab, David, Esther, etc.), there are two noteworthy observations: It was more about their character than their competency or credentials, and it was more about their availability than their ability. How does this trend compare to worldly standards? How would our respective teams (at work or at school) and society at large look different if those in leadership took a similar approach?

Read Acts 4:13 and 1 Corinthians 1:26-29. Although Peter and John were considered "ordinary men," God's power was working in them and through them in an extraordinary way. If we survey the stories of the disciples and other people who were called in the New Testament (John the Baptist, Saul/Paul, Timothy, etc.), we continue to see the same trend noted from the Old Testament. Again, God doesn't call the equipped; He equips the called. Why do you think God chooses to operate this way? How should this change the way we approach life?

Read John 15:16, Romans 8:28-30, Ephesians 2:8-10, and 1 Peter 2:9. What are some of the lies you've bought into about not being qualified to be used to advance God's Kingdom (e.g. imperfections, insecurities, etc.)? How do passages like these help us combat the lies of the Enemy? Why is it important for us to understand we've been called and qualified by God to be set apart from the rest of the world?

Share this episode with at least 2-3 other guys in your life. Listen to Part 2 as soon as you have an opportunity.

Two Words: Crush Pride

"Pride is your greatest enemy; humility is your greatest friend."—C.S. Lewis.

Pride makes everything about us. We're the center of the universe—it's all about me…

Prideful men are everywhere; humble, confident men are hard to find. Here's the reality: God can do anything in a humble man and He won't do anything with a prideful man. We've got to choose what kind of man we want to be.

In this week's episode, Scott sits down with guest John Sampson for a tag-team dive into key scriptures where we learn what God thinks of pride and how to form a step-by-step approach to crush it out of our lives.

LOCKER ROOM DISCUSSION GUIDE S10E9 - Two Words: Crush Pride

What's something you take pride in (e.g. accomplishment/achievement, organization/team, position/title, skill/ability, etc.)? How do you maintain a healthy view of this?

We see pride manifest in a number of unhealthy ways throughout the pages of the Bible. How would you define pride in this context? Why is pride considered the root of all sin?

Read Proverbs 26:12 and Romans 12:16. One definition of pride is essentially our belief that we know better than God. This was first evident during the Fall in Genesis Ch.3. What does it mean to be "wise in our own eyes"? Where does pride have the tendency to rear its head in an unhealthy way in your life?

Read Proverbs 8:13, Proverbs 16:5, and James 4:6. The Bible is clear on how God feels about pride. How should we respond in light of this? Despite what Scripture says, why is pride so difficult to let go? Why is pride dangerous, especially for men?

Read 2 Samuel 12:1-9 and Matthew 7:3-5. Nathan's confrontation of David's hypocrisy is a great example of what Jesus refers to as the "plank" and the "speck" dynamic in the Sermon on the Mount. Why is it so easy for us to see pride in other people and not in ourselves?

Read Romans 6:5-7, Galatians 2:20, and Ephesians 4:22-24. When we reflect on who we are in Christ and what God has done for us, our response should be gratitude and humility. Why is it critical for us to understand our new identity in Christ? How does this help us keep our pride in check?

Read Philippians 2:5-8. Humility is considered the antidote to pride. Based on this text, we see how Jesus modeled this for us at the highest level. Who in your life exemplifies humility? Why is humility such an attractive trait?

Read Proverbs 15:31-33 and Proverbs 19:20. It takes humility to allow others to speak the truth in love to us, receive it graciously, and respond accordingly. Who is allowed to speak into your life? How do you receive their feedback?

Read Matthew 20:26-28 and Philippians 2:3-4. It also takes humility to serve others. Can you think of someone who has gone above and beyond to serve you during your lifetime? What did that mean to you? Who is God calling you to serve during this season?

As men, we need to intentionally confront and crush the unaddressed pride currently in our lives. For a short, compelling read about biblical humility, grab a copy of The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness by Tim Keller.      

Click Here for the video podcast

Two Words: Own It

Own it. The mindset for this week is transparent ownership.

Transparent ownership is about taking personal responsibility. It's about personal accountability. It's being socially, emotionally, and relationally aware of how we operate. Owning it is self-awareness of our words, actions, reactions, and motivations. It's having a pulse on your personal and professional relationships, and your relationships with your wife and kids. Owning it pushes us towards transparency and healthier relationships. What we'll also find is that transparent ownership actually enhances the culture around you.

A quick correction from last week's episode: here is a link to the further reading on spiritual warfare from Gary Black: Going Deeper in Spiritual Warfare

LOCKER ROOM DISCUSSION GUIDE S10E8:  "Two Words: Own It"

1. Share a time when you were caught "red-handed" as a kid. What was your initial response in the moment? What have you learned from the experience?

2. How would you define the word "ownership"? What does this currently look like in your own life?

3. There are a number of barriers or roadblocks to taking ownership. Which of the following hinders your ability to take ownership and why: 
  - Fear 
  - Guilt / Shame 
  - Insecurity 
  - Perfectionism 
  - Pride

4. How does a lack of ownership affect our relationship with God and our relationships with other people (e.g. home, school, sports, work, etc.)? What ways do you see a lack of ownership manifesting in our culture?

5. Read Genesis 2:15-17 and Genesis 3:1-13. Before the Fall, God gave Adam work, responsibility, and freedom with limits. Although Eve often takes the brunt of the criticism, the first sin is actually Adam abdicating his responsibility. This resulted in them covering and hiding in their shame then blame-shifting when God confronts them. Why is this pattern our natural response? How do we guard against it?

6. Read Hebrews 4:16. Does this verse change your perspective on how we can approach God? If so, how? 

7. Read 1 John 1:8-10 and Romans 2:4. We need to own our sin and not allow our sin to own us. Do these passages make you more willing or more reluctant to approach God with what you need to own? Why?

8. Read Psalm 51:1-19 and Psalm 32:1-5. Although David learned the hard way (see 2 Samuel 11 & 12), these Psalms reveal a true heart change. How has God redeemed the moments in your life when you felt like you blew it?

9. Read 2 Corinthians 5:21 and Luke 23:34. Jesus demonstrated the ultimate form of ownership on the Cross when He took on the sin of the world. He even asked God to forgive His persecutors as He hung on the Cross. How should the example of Jesus impact the way we engage and interact with the people in our sphere of influence?

10. Who do you need to "own it" with this week? Is it your significant other, your kids, your co-workers, your classmates, your teammates, or your friends? Pray and ask God to give you the courage to initiate a conversation and the discernment to navigate the discussion. 

Your Enemy

We all have an enemy. We actually have real enemies. The Bible tells us our enemies are Satan and demons, the world, and the flesh. This is important, because it doesn't matter if you're playing high school sports or entering the ring in the UFC; to have a chance of winning, you need to know your enemy. With this week's guest Gary Black, we'll do a deep dive on Satan and demons and learn how to fight our enemy.

Further reading on spiritual warfare:
Bondage Breaker by Neil Anderson
The Adversary by Mark Bubeck
Spiritual Warfare by Karl Payne
The Handbook For Spiritual Warfare by Ed Murphy

And this link Gary mentioned in today's episode: Going Deeper In Understanding Spiritual Warfare

If we can help you in any way or you'd like to share how this podcast is encouraging you, feel free to shoot us an email at lockerroom@southland.church

LOCKER ROOM DISCUSSION GUIDE S10E7: "Two Words: Your Enemy"

Who is your favorite movie or television villain (The Joker, Darth Vader, Green Thanos, Voldemort, etc.)? Why?

Has anyone ever introduced you to the concept of spiritual warfare? If so, how did they describe it? What were your main takeaways?

Satan (aka "the Devil" or "the Enemy") has a number of descriptions listed throughout the Bible. If someone asked you to describe Satan, what words would you use?

"The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he doesn't exist." -Charles Baudelaire. What are your thoughts on this statement? Are there any other misconceptions about Satan you've heard?

Read John 10:10 and 1 Peter 5:8-10. Scripture is clear on what Satan's intent is. What do we learn about him based on these two passages? Why is it critical for us to know our opposition?

Read Genesis 3:1-7, Matthew 4:1-11, and John 8:44. Satan's primary strategy has been consistent throughout the course of history. He creates confusion and division by planting seeds of doubt in our minds and in our hearts. However, Jesus shows us one of the most effective ways we combat Satan's lies is with God's truth. What lies has Satan tried to sell to you? What were the consequences of buying into these lies?

Read 2 Corinthians 10:3-6. This passage highlights a sobering reality: As long as we're alive, we're in a fight whether we want to be or not. In light of this, how can we be more proactive than reactive when it comes to spiritual warfare? Which of the following has been the toughest battle for you spiritually during this season:

- Anger
- Ego / Pride 
- Guilt / Shame
- Hopelessness / Despair 
- Isolation
- Misplaced identity (i.e. career, sports, etc.)
- Passivity
- Rejection
- Temptation
- Thought patterns
- Unforgiveness

Read Romans 8:35-39, 1 Corinthians 10:13, and Ephesians 2:11-22. These verses remind us that we fight from victory, rather than for victory. Why is this perspective so important for us as followers of Jesus? How should this change the way we engage with the world around us? What are some of the resources or tools we have available as we wage war with the Enemy?

Prayer is arguably one of the most overlooked aspects of spiritual warfare. Print a copy of this "Armor of God" prayer based on Ephesians 6:10-20. Make a commitment to read through it and pray over it this week.

Athletes and coaches are known for studying their opponents' game film. For an interesting take on one author's portrayal of what this looks like in the spiritual realm, grab a copy of C.S. Lewis' classic book, The Screwtape Letters or listen to the audiobook.    

Two Words: Be Accountable

We've each got a shot at moving beyond where we are and towards the men that God wants us to be—but we need a band of brothers—we need a couple guys. God wants us to step off the island and have some guys that we can count on. And there are guys that need to be able to count on us. We all need these relationships. Join us on this week's podcast as Scott talks about being accountable.

Join us March 17-18 for Meal Pack!
Across all five Southland campuses in partnership with Lifeline Christian Mission, we will pack one million meals to feed hungry kids around the world. All of the meals are distributed through Lifeline's sites in countries like Honduras, Ecuador, Guatemala, and some countries in Africa.

To be a part of this event, sign up at http://southland.church/mealpack

LOCKER ROOM DISCUSSION GUIDE S10E6: "Two Words: Be Accountable"

Who's the best classmate, teammate, or co-worker you've ever collaborated with? What did you appreciate the most about them?

Who do you currently spend the most time with? How would you describe the dynamics of the relationship

What's the difference between knowing someone vs. knowing about someone? What are some of the barriers you've personally experienced or witnessed that prevent men from getting beyond superficial conversations and relationships with other guys?

Read Proverbs 27:17, Galatians 6:2, and James 5:16. Accountability is a Christ-centered relationship that encourages spiritual growth and transformation. There are a number of noteworthy examples throughout Scripture — Moses and Jethro (Exodus), David and Nathan (2 Samuel), Jesus and the disciples (Gospels), Paul and Timothy (1 & 2 Timothy) — just to name a few. What are the benefits of accountability?

Read Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 and discuss the following quote: "If sin destroyed Samson (the strongest man), Solomon (the wisest man), and David (the man after God's heart), then it can overpower, outsmart, and overcome you, too." Why is it tempting for men to insist on pridefully living their lives as a solo mission? How can we practically help each other fight against this?

Read Proverbs 11:2, James 1:19-20, and 1 Peter 5:5. Humility is the antidote to pride. It's one thing to invite people into your life; it's another thing to humbly receive what they have to say. Read and discuss the following humility inventory:
- When someone gives me feedback, what's my knee-jerk reaction?
- How often do I consider the perspective of others?
- When's the last time I've invited someone to teach me something?
- When's the last time I've changed my mind about something?
- How willing am I to admit when I'm wrong?
- How do I respond when corrected?

Read Proverbs 11:14, 12:15, 15:22, 19:20-21, and 27:6. These verses speak to our need for wise counsel. Who are the voices you currently allow to speak into your life? Could you confidently and honestly classify their counsel as wise? What are the filters you use to determine if their counsel is wise?

Grab 1 or 2 guys this week and work through each of these 5 questions: What's God teaching you? Where are you winning? Where are you struggling? How are you leading? How can I pray for you? Schedule another time to meet again next week or the following week.

If you're not connected with other godly men, check out our groups directory at southland.church/groups to sign up or contact the person who oversees the Groups Ministry at your campus.

Share this episode with at least 2-3 other guys in your sphere of influence.

This week on the podcast, we are talking about how to be financially wise in marriage. This topic is super important for married couples. A lot of us grew up in homes where finances were never talked about. We weren't taught how to spend wisely, or how to budget. Many of us grew up in homes that were upside down in all kinds of debt. Then we stand up on a stage in front of friends and family, say some vows and suddenly begin our new life together without the financial tools to navigate. This can put us behind the 8-ball from the very beginning.

Paul tells us Christ-followers to live different than the world. We're called to a different standard. He spells it out plainly in Romans 12:2 (NIV): "Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will."

This week on the podcast, our guests are Kurt and Lori Braun. Kurt recently retired from 20+ years at Southland, managing our church's finances and has helped guide us to a very healthy place. In this conversation we'll dive into how to apply the same methods and wisdom to financial health in our marriages.

--

DISCUSSION:

Opening Questions

• Where are you winning this week?

• Last week we ended with the question, "What is one practical step you will take this week to love and serve your spouse (or future spouse) better?" 

• What is the step you took this week and how did that play out?

• When you think "Financially wise marriage" what comes to mind?

Discussion Questions

Romans 12:2 says, "do not conform to the pattern of this world." What are some ways that the world manages finances and how does that differ from how we should?

What money habits did you learn growing up? Which ones still help you today and which ones do you need to unlearn?

Scott emphasizes the importance of our first fruits. What makes giving "first" hard for most of us? What would it look like for you personally to put God first financially?

Life is unexpected. Why is it important to have a savings or emergency fund?

We know how important communication is in marriages, but sometimes that doesn't carry over to how we spend our money. How can the lack of communication specifically around money be so dangerous to our marriages?

If you have kids, how are you teaching them about money? If not, how do you hope to model financial wisdom in the future?

Have you tried the 10 10 80 rule Kurt talks about? Was it helpful?

Kurt closes by saying we have to confront the brutal facts and be honest about where you are. What is one conversation, habit, or change you will commit to this week to improve how you and your spouse handle money?

Bottom line:

What's your next steps?  Implement the right plan.  Develop the right rhythms.  Dig out of debt, live within your means, trust God and steward money and set an example by what you're learning and through how you impart financial wisdom to them.  This matters. Make it a priority!

Resources:

• Crown Financial Ministries has a ton of great resources… crown.org   

• Dave Ramsey resources:  7 Baby Steps to Financial Freedom, EveryDollar App, Debt Snowball Calculator, and many more are found on Ramseysolutions.com   

• Southland provides something called Wills & Estates (Financial Planning Ministry).  No fee to Southland people.  Dates for 2026:  April 13th & October 12th.  

• Book by Randy Alcorn: The Treasure Principle

Wrap Up:

• If this podcast has encouraged you—We'd love to hear from you. 

• If you're wrestling with Christianity, interested in getting baptized or need help figuring out your next step…shoot us an email at lockerroom@southland.church   

• As always…if this podcast has encouraged you—share it with a friend.  You never know how an episode like this can help those in your life that you care about.

• Thanks for listening.  Get after it!  We'll catch you next time on Locker Room.      

Worship Jesus

We all worship something. We're all worshippers. It just depends on who or what we worship.

For followers of Jesus, worship is our response—both personally and corporately—to God for who He is, and what He's done; expressed by the things we say and the things we do—by the way we live our lives.

This week Scott is joined by Mike Vandemark to talk about his heartbeat of using the gift of music to bring people together. Along the way we break down some of the nuts and bolts of how and why we worship at Southland.

Join us March 17-18 for Meal Pack!
Across all five Southland campuses in partnership with Lifeline Christian Mission, we will pack one million meals to feed hungry kids around the world. All of the meals are distributed through Lifeline's sites in countries like Honduras, Ecuador, Guatemala, and some countries in Africa.

To be a part of this event, sign up at http://southland.church/mealpack

You can find all of the original songs by Southland Music at http://southland.church/music

Scott and Mike also talked about the Lexington Lab Band project in this episode, you can check it out at https://www.youtube.com/@LexingtonLabBand

LOCKER ROOM DISCUSSION GUIDE S10E5: "Two Words: Worship Jesus"

1. Who are a few of your favorite music artists or bands? What's one song you could listen to on repeat?

2. Do you play any instruments or sing? If not, what's one instrument you've always wanted to learn how to play or your go-to karaoke song?

3. Has your taste in music evolved at all over the years? If so, how?

4. What's one of your favorite contemporary worship songs? What resonates with you about this particular song?

5. What's one of your favorite hymns? What resonates with you about this particular song?

6. Read Exodus 20:3-6. Although worshiping golden statues or other graven images is less prevalent today, idolatry still manifests in different forms. How would you define the relationship between idolatry and worship?

7. Read Romans 1:21-25 and 1 Corinthians 10:14. What are some of the ways you've found yourself or witnessed others idolizing created things instead of worshiping the Creator? Although Paul encourages us to flee idolatry, how do we typically respond when this is brought to our attention? What does this reveal at the heart level?

8. Read 2 Chronicles 5:13 and Psalm 98:1-7. What tends to grab your attention during worship services on Sundays? How are these different effects or elements meant to draw us closer to God?

9. Read Psalm 95:1-6 and Psalm 100:1-5. Joy, praise, shouting, and singing are recurring themes in these passages. Does worshiping during service on Sundays or other events (i.e. Men's Conference, Worship Night, etc.) come naturally for you? Why or why not?

10. Read Colossians 3:15-17. God gave us His all and His best when He sent us His Son, Jesus. Worship is our response (personally and collectively) to God for who He is and what He's done. This is expressed in what we say and do in all areas of life. Spend some time prayerfully considering what area(s) in your life you've been holding back with your faith. Ask God to give you the conviction and the courage to be more engaged.

Two Words: Life Change

Jesus didn't just come to forgive and love us, but to free us, unburden and heal us. This week Scott sits down with Edgar Saborit to hear how deciding to follow Jesus has changed his life for the better.

I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. - Ezekiel 36:26(NIV)

LOCKER ROOM DISCUSSION GUIDE S10E4:

1. Have you had an opportunity to travel outside of the country? If so, what's been your favorite place to visit? If not, where would you like to go? 

2. What's something in your life that's changed over the past year? How do you typically respond to change (barber, job, moving, vehicles, etc.)? What factors have influenced the way you approach change?

3. The phrase "Follow Me" appears over 20 times throughout the gospel accounts in the New Testament. What was the catalyst for you to begin following Jesus? How has following Jesus changed the relational dynamics within your sphere of influence (significant other, kids, friends, coworkers, etc.)? If you haven't started following Jesus yet, what reservations are currently holding you back? 

4. Read Joshua 24:15 and Matthew 7:24-27. What's the foundation you're currently building for your family or future family?

5. Read 1 Corinthians 13:4-7. Although this passage is often recited at weddings, it's worth noting these are some important character traits for men to lean into as we prepare for marriage and parenting or persevere in marriage and parenting. Would the people closest to you say you reflect these attributes? Which ones are an area of growth for you?  

6. Read Ephesians 5:22-33 and 1 Peter 3:7. From an eternal perspective, one day God will hold us accountable for how we've stewarded the lives of those He's entrusted to us. What are the implications for men in terms of how we lead, love, and serve our significant others? How has your significant other played a role in your spiritual growth and development? 

7. Read Proverbs 18:22, Proverbs 19:14 and Proverbs 31:10, 30. Do you cherish and value your significant other? How can you intentionally pray for your significant other and with your significant other? If you're single, how can you intentionally pray for your future spouse?

8. Read Psalm 127:3-5, Proverbs 22:6, and Deuteronomy 6:5-9. Do you cherish and value your children? How can you intentionally pray for your kids and with your kids? If you're single, how can you intentionally pray for your future children?

9. Read 1 Corinthians 11:1. This is a bold statement from the apostle Paul. By God's grace, Jesus' example, and the power of the Holy Spirit, we can become the Christ-like men God desires for us to be so that we can be a Christ-like example for others. Here's a sobering thought: What's the type of man you want to be remembered for after your time on this earth is finished? What's the legacy you want to leave?

10.  We all have someone in our circle who desperately needs the type of life transformation only Jesus can provide, but maybe they're not ready to step foot inside of a church yet. Read, pray, and meditate on Ezekiel 36:26 and prayerfully consider who God is nudging you to share this podcast with, invite to your men's group, or invite to church.  

Two Words: Fine Print

This week we're talking about the fine print of the Christian life.

If we're not careful we can talk about faith in a way that sounds easy or irresistible—rainbows and unicorns—as if everything is just great all the time. It's not true. The Bible doesn't promise any of this.

This week's episode is titled fine print; but not because God is hiding something from us or trying to speed past and hide all the side effects of being a Christ-follower. He doesn't do that. The invitation that Jesus invites us into is incredible, but that doesn't mean it doesn't come with hard things.

This season of Locker Room we're taking each week to talk about two words. Two words to drive our content and our discussion with different guests.

If you're starting a Locker Room Group or simply having conversations with other men--your sons, your friends, or coworkers--our hope is to create some critical discussions about things that matter.

LOCKER ROOM DISCUSSION GUIDE S10 E3: Two Words: Fine Print

1. Are you the type of guy to read the "fine print" of an instructions booklet before assembling something or do you just "figure it out" without reading? 

2. Has there ever been a time when you didn't read the fine print to something (contract, medication, product, service, etc.), and it cost you? What did you learn from the experience?

3. Have you ever had a moment or a season where you felt like your walk with Jesus wasn't "as advertised" and you found yourself angry, confused, discouraged, doubtful, or frustrated? What did God teach you in the process?  

4. Read Matthew 7:24-27. Jesus ends His most famous teaching known as the "Sermon on the Mount" by highlighting the two types of foundations we can build on. What's noteworthy is both houses will inevitably face storms. What have the storms in your life (addiction, chronic illness, financial struggles, infertility, job loss, relationship strife, etc.) revealed about your foundation? 

5. Read Romans 5:3-5, James 1:2-4, and 1 Peter 1 3-7. How do these verses provide some perspective on the purpose of suffering and trials?  

6. Read Hebrews 11:1. How would you explain "faith" to someone who is not a follower of Jesus? The rest of Ch.11 lists what modern interpreters have referred to as the "Hall of Faith." Which story of faith from the Old Testament resonates with you?

7. Read Deuteronomy 31:8, Psalm 55:22, Psalm 103:8-12, Matthew 11:28-30, 1 Corinthians 10:13, Philippians 4:11-13, 1 John 5:14-15, and Revelation 21:4. These are 8 powerful promises worth bookmarking, highlighting, or converting to memory. Which one speaks to you? Why is it crucial for us to remember God's promises in the midst of life's storms?   

8. Read John 16:33 and 2 Peter 3:13. How do we manage the tension of living in between the cross and the crown or the "already and not yet"?

9. Read Matthew 26:36-46. Jesus shows us during our most vulnerable moments, we need biblical community, honest prayer, an eternal perspective, and God's peace. Which of these do you tend to lose sight of? 

10.  Take some time to listen to the song "Anchor of Peace" by North Point Worship. Meditate on the lyrics this week. 

"You're invited!"

When Jesus says you're invited...he means it. He knows everything about us and yet he still pursues us. What is Jesus inviting us into? How do we respond?

Join us this week as we sit down with Jon Weece to talk about the greatest invitation we've been given. We'll dive into the steps to accept Jesus' invitation and celebrate how he redeems our stories to help reach others.

This season of Locker Room we're taking each week to talk about two words. Two words to drive our content and our discussion with different guests.

If you're starting a Locker Room Group or simply having conversations with other men--your sons, your friends, or coworkers--our hope is to create some critical discussions about things that matter.

LOCKER ROOM DISCUSSION GUIDE, S1E2 - "You're Invited"

1. Did your family members or friends give you a nickname? If so, what is it and how did you earn it? 
2. What's the most recent event you've been invited to (ball game, concert, wedding, etc.)? What resonated with you about the experience? 
3. Who was the first person to invite you to church? How would you describe your first church experience?
4. Read Matthew 16:24. Jesus gives an open invitation for anyone to follow Him with two qualifiers – denying ourselves and picking up our cross. Why are these two conditions listed first? What does this mean practically? 
5. Read Ephesians 2:8-9. These verses tell us that we are saved by grace through faith in Jesus. Why is it important to remind ourselves that we are not saved by our own works? 
6. Read Acts 2:37-39 and 2 Peter 3:9. When we hear the Gospel, our natural response should be to turn away from our former life and reorient ourselves to our new life in Christ. In light of God's patience with us and promise for us, why do we tend to respond in rebellion instead of repentance?
7. Read Romans 10:9-13. If you've done so, what led you to the decision to confess Jesus as your Savior and Lord? How has your life been different since making this decision?  
8. Read Matthew 3:13-17 and Acts 22:16. Jesus Himself demonstrates humility by being immersed in the waters of baptism. In the 1st century Church, we also see this sense of urgency to be baptized as a response to hearing the Gospel and obediently following the example of Jesus. If you have been baptized, what was your baptism experience like? If you have not been baptized, what questions or reservations have kept you out of the water?    
9. Read Romans 6:1-14. In this passage, Paul clarifies our relationship to sin in light of God's grace. When we accept Jesus' invitation through faith, repentance, confession, and baptism, we put habitual sin to death and walk in our new identity in Christ. How do we not abuse God's grace? Why is it important for us to understand our new identity in Christ?  
10. Grab a sheet of paper and draw a line down the middle. On one side, describe your new life in Christ. On the other side, write down what your life would be like without Jesus. Use this resource as a tool to help you craft your testimony as you share what Jesus has done in your life with others. 

"What comes into our minds when we think about God is the most important thing about us."
--A. W. Tozer

If you were asked to describe Jesus in two words, what would it be?  It's a great question, right? It's very telling of what we know or understand about who He is.

We're kicking off this season of Locker Room by taking each week to talk about 2 Words. Each week we'll have two words that drive our content and drive our discussion with different guests. In this episode, we'll focus in on two words to describe Jesus: Warrior and King.

If you're starting a Locker Room Group or simply having conversations with other men--your sons, your friends, or coworkers--our hope is to create some critical discussions about things that matter. 

LOCKER ROOM DISCUSSION GUIDE, S10E1: Warrior King

1. If your family or your friends were to introduce you to someone new, what two words would they use to describe you? 
2. Who first introduced you to Jesus? What picture was painted to describe Him? 
3. What was your initial perception of Jesus? Has your view of Him evolved over time? If so, how?   
4. What two words would you use to describe Jesus today? Why did you choose these specific words?  
5. How would you define a "warrior"? Who are some of the examples that come to mind?  
6. Read Romans 5:6-11 and Isaiah 53:4-5. How do these passages highlight Jesus as a warrior? 
7. How would you define a "king"? What attributes of a king would lead to submission under their authority?
8. Read Revelation 17:14 and Revelation 19:11-16. How do these passages highlight Jesus as king? 
9. Look up the lyrics to the song "King of Kings" by Hillsong. Which lines resonate with you in light of Jesus being both warrior and king? Why? 
10. Has this conversation changed your view of who Jesus is? If so, how?     

What does the future hold for Locker Room podcast? Some changes are on the horizon. Full details revealed in this episode--featuring Scott Nickell and Scott Hatfield.

We're going to settle it. You've heard them talk about it in the podcast, and In this bonus episode of Locker Room we take a break from the serious stuff for a throwdown between friends on the course. Nickell and Vandee, Hatfield and Austin Vitucci hit the course at Shilltto Park on a warm fall day to find out who is the best. Neil Gregory was there to film as it all went down. Now back in the studio, the guys break down the day and discuss other such weighty topics.

You can watch the match in all its glory at lockerroompodcast.com

How can I become a more engaged father? What are some tips for raising godly boys? How can I have a meaningful conversation with my son?

In this special episode of Locker Room, Scott welcomes Kent Evans to the podcast. Kent is an author and co-founder of Manhood Journey, a ministry that helps fathers and mentors build the next generation of godly men.

You can find more resources from Manhood Journey at https://manhoodjourney.org

Nearly 2000 men came together on August 28, to be built up and prepared to step into where God is calling us. Tune in with Scott Nickell & Hatfield for an extended breakdown of topics discussed and ways to move forward.

On this special bonus episode of Locker Room podcast Scott sits down with three former players from the University of Kentucky Men's Basketball team.

Josh Carrier, JP Blevins and Ravi Moss share stories of what it was like on the inside during their time wearing the blue and white, including lessons learned and how to build your life and your identify in Christ and not based on what you do.

The path God has laid out for us in marriage is straightforward:

You walk with Jesus and allow Him to transform you into the person another person is looking for. You pray for your future spouse. You date with Godly intentions; you date on purpose. You seek to keep Jesus in the middle and at some point, you take the step—and it's a daunting step—into marriage. You can do your due diligence, but at the end of the day, it's a risk…you are trusting that your spouse will go all-in and stay all-in. You're trusting that they'll partner with you to chase God's purposes and cultivate deep intimacy as you seek to live on-mission.

In this episode of the podcast we sit down with our guests, Mike and Debbie Breaux, to learn more about how to live out a Christ-centered marriage.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

Opening:

• Where are you winning this week?

• Last week we asked: "What is one specific way you can stand for Jesus at home, work, or with friends?" How did you live that out this week?

• When you think of a Christ-centered marriage, is there a couple that comes to mind? What stands out about their relationship?

Discussion:

Mike talks about the danger of living "multiple lives." Why is integrity—being the same person everywhere—so important in marriage and leadership?

Debbie mentions Soul mate vs Soil mate. What are you currently doing to create healthy soil for spiritual and relational growth?

Mike mentions that Fruit grows with humility and gratitude. Why do pride and entitlement hurt relationships so quickly?

"Death to self is the pulse that keeps love alive." What does this look like practically in everyday marriage and relationships?

What patterns from your upbringing have shaped how you love, communicate, or handle conflict?

What's the difference between "if" love and "even if" love? How does that change the way you approach commitment?

What is one practical step you will take this week to love and serve your spouse (or future spouse) better?

"Breakfast Questions"

1. God first:  What's God been teaching us?

2. Marriage:  Where are we winning?  How are we doing?  What do we need to work on?

3. Kids:  How are they doing?  What do we need to do to invest in them right now?

4. You'd look at your calendars.  Stay on the same page.  

5. Last question:  You'd ask, "How can I pray for you?"

Wrap Up:

• If this podcast has encouraged you—we'd love to hear from you. 

• If you're wrestling with Christianity, interested in getting baptized or need help figuring out your next step…shoot us an email at lockerroom@southland.church.  

• As always…if this podcast has encouraged you—share it with a friend.  You never know how an episode like this can help those in your life that you care about.

• Thanks for listening.  Get after it!  We'll catch you next time on Locker Room.

As we wrap up this season of listener-submitted questions, Neil Gregory is back on the podcast to discuss one of the biggest questions many Jesus followers ask, "How do you know you're following Christ and His will for your life?"

Stay tuned for a bonus episode of Locker Room coming up next week with some special guests...

In this season of Locker Room we're answering your submitted questions.

Scott and Jon are back this week to hit this week's question: What are the top three things dads should be doing to help our young ones in their faith journey?

Have a good question you want us to answer during this season? Drop your questions at lockerroompodcast.com

In this season of Locker Room we're answering your submitted questions.

Jon Weece is back on the podcast to help answer this question: "I would love to hear about the history of the church from its leaders, specifically the origins of Southland and how we got to where we are, but also how that relates to the general history of the early Church in Acts."

Have a good question you want us to answer during this season? Drop your questions at lockerroompodcast.com

Scott is joined by Connor Hall this week to discuss  this question from the perspectives of two guys in different stages of life.

Have a good question you want us to answer during this season? Drop your questions at lockerroompodcast.com

In this season of Locker Room we're answering your submitted questions. Scott welcomes Neil Gregory to the podcast to discuss this question:

How do we tune out the distractions of modern society--social media, video games, smart phones and the 24-hour news cycle--and where do we draw the line between removing ourselves and our families from these activities, versus choosing to take part in them to engage with others in a positve and meaningful way?

Have a good question you want us to answer during this season? Drop your questions at lockerroompodcast.com

In this season of Locker Room we're answering your submitted questions. Jon Weece joins Scott this week to hit this question:

How do you balance a healthy sex relationship in a Christian marriage when each person has different levels of desire and expectations?

Have a good question you want us to answer during this season? Drop your questions at lockerroompodcast.com

For this season of Locker Room we're answering your submitted questions. Scott Hatfield is back this week to break down this question:

Why does the Church shy away from discussions around sexuality?

Have a good question you want us to hit during this season? Drop your questions at lockerroompodcast.com

For this season of Locker Room we're answering your submitted questions. This week Scott kicks off with guest Mike Vandemark to break down this question:

Is there a biblical case for adult men to pursue hobbies? With so many God-given responsibilities, how does one justify time spent on self?

Have a good question you want us to hit during this season? Drop your questions at lockerroompodcast.com

Be apart of the next season of the Locker Room Podcast by heading to Lockerroompodcast.com and submitting your questions today.

In this episode we take a break from the hot-button topics of this season to enjoy some lighthearted banter and hot takes in the point/counterpoint style with guests Mike Vandemark and Scott Hatfield.

Below are all of the questions that Scott asked in the podcast.  Pick 2-3 from each category to discuss with your group.

• What are the benefits of talking about things like this?  What do we learn about one another?  Is it a waste of time?
• How often do you get together with friends to just be together and have fun?
• Could you benefit from doing it more often?  How so?
• How does all of this play into our life and ministry?  Does any of this have any benefit for ministry or daily living for Christ?

Sports:

1. Is golf a sport or a game?
2. Which of the big 3 sports would you prefer to watch live and in person?
3. The college football championship should just be called the SEC championship, true or false?
4. Kobe or Michael Jordan?  MJ or Lebron?
5. 1996 Wildcats vs. 1991 UNLV Runnin' Rebels, who's better?

Movies:

1. The Matrix - overrated or underrated?
2. If you had to pick between Steven Segal and Craig T. Nelson to play the lead role in every movie, which one would you pick?
3. Dumb and Dumber or Tommy Boy?
4. Shawshank Redemption or Braveheart?
5. Better actor:  Martin Lawrence or Eddie Murphy?

Music:

1. Better Rock Band?  AC/DC or Led Zeppelin?
2. True or False, Rapper's Delight is a terrible rap song?
3. You're on a deserted island and you can listen to only Journey or only Bon Jovi, what do you choose?
4. You are doing Karaoke and you can choose between performing Bohemian Rhapsody or the Humpty Dance?
5. Who wins in a fight, Tony Bennett or Willie Nelson?

There's something really powerful going on right now in our nation, on college campuses and in healthy, bible-based, mission-driven churches. We're seeing lots of people coming to church for the first time, people coming back to church and people investigating faith and then being baptized into Jesus.

Why is this happening? One of the big reasons we've seen this significant movement of God is because the church has been under attack. It's always been under attack but over the last 5+ years we've seen a dramatic shift that's been aggressively challenging the church.

The old quote has become popular again: "Comfortable times create weak men, weak men create hard times, hard times create strong men, and strong men create good times." Hard times produce great students, great men and women, great marriages, great families and great churches. Our big word for today is persecution.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

Opening Question

• Where are you winning this week?

• Last week we talked about habits that keep us from God's best. How did you work on that this week?

Discussion:

Scott says persecution is one of the biggest reasons churches are growing right now. Does that surprise you? Why or why not?

"Comfortable times create weak men, hard times create strong men." Where has comfort made you spiritually soft? What hard season has actually strengthened your faith?

Read Matthew 5:44 and Luke 6:27-28. Who is hard to love or pray for right now because of how they've treated your faith? What would it look like to "do good" to them this week?

The apostles refused to recant their faith even facing death. Where are you most tempted to compromise your beliefs right now?

Scott mentions we are "playing an away game." Where do you feel the most resistance to your faith right now? (work, family, school, social media, friend groups)

Why is it important for men to be anchored, resilient, and willing to persevere in hard seasons?

"The way that you respond might open a door to a relationship with Jesus." Have you seen this happen in your life? Does this change the way you think about the way you respond to persecution?

What fear most keeps you from being bold about your faith?

"My prayer is that when I die, all of Hell will rejoice that I am out of the fight." What would it look like for you to live with that kind of faith right now?

What is one specific way you can stand for Jesus this week—at home, work, or with friends?

Wrap Up:

• If this podcast has encouraged you—we'd love to hear from you. 

• If you're wrestling with Christianity, interested in getting baptized or need help figuring out your next step…shoot us an email at lockerroom@southland.church.  

• As always…if this podcast has encouraged you—share it with a friend.  You never know how an episode like this can help those in your life that you care about.

• Thanks for listening.  Get after it!  We'll catch you next time on Locker Room.    

One of the challenges for us as men, especially when we assume the role of provider, protector, and any vocational callings, is knowing when it is time to leave one thing and move on to the next thing in our lives. In this episode Scott Hatfield returns to the podcast to reflect on these moments of change and how to discern best what's next.

1. How do you know when it's time to move on? To leave one thing and move to the next thing? How have you filtered those questions at different points in your life?

2. Hatfield found himself in a conversation that turned into an interview. Have you ever been in a situation or conversation that was pivotal in your work and/or calling?

3. We all need mentors; people who are ahead of us on the journey and pour their experience into us. Who is that for you? If you don't have a mentor, who might you ask to be that person for you?

4. Whose work, life, or ministry do you look up to or admire from afar? Pray and ask God for the opportunity to grab some time with that person. Can you reach out to schedule an appointment through their admin, or offer to buy them coffee or a meal?

5. "Quit looking over the fence. There is fruit in longevity." Evaluate your own life and your current position based on this quote. How's it going?

6. Hatfield recounts seasons of being entrusted with everything and seasons of being entrusted to lead nothing. How have you seen God work in seasons of much and seasons of little? How has it directly impacted decisions about what to do, and where to stay or go?

7. Sometimes simple difficulty is not the best filter for deciding whether it's time to move on. What are some other critical elements that need to be in the decision-making process as well?

8. Have you ever been drawn toward something that seemed like the right idea for you but you learned it wasn't God's idea? Did you realize that before or after a move was made?

9. What do you sense God asking you to do that you need to bring to Him in prayer for further clarity and guidance?

Deconstruction is a word used frequently in regard to people who are 'deconstructing their faith.' Sometimes at the end of this process, people end up denying their faith altogether. Usually the first stop on this journey of deconstruction is 'Progressive Christianity.' In this episode, Scott breaks down some of the main drivers of the progressive Christian movement, and talks about how we equip ourselves to call others home by being immersed in scripture while simultaneously understanding our culture.

The four books referenced at the end of this episode:

Another Gospel? by Alisa Childers
The Gathering Storm by Albert Muller
That Hideous Strength: How the West Was Lost by Melvin Tinker
A Grand Illusion by David Young

1. Have you experienced the idea of "Deconstruction" in the way society views it today? Is there a sense of tension when you hear the ideas of Deconstruction and Progress in the same ideology

2. When you think of Progressive Christianity, do you feel uncertain what the Progression is actually moving towards? If not, reflect on what aspects of Christianity deserve or require a modern advancement. Is there anything?

3. Scott talks about two drivers behind the Progressive Christian movement: Having a seat at the cool kids table and the opportunity to have sex with someone who you're not married to. How do those ideas strike you? Agree or disagree—and why?

4. Scott throws out that he doesn't agree with the label of Progressive Christianity because it isn't Christianity. Instead he calls it Progressive Spirituality. What are the pitfalls that Progressivity has opened to the Christian faith that can result in loss of Christianity and a movement toward general Spirituality?

5. Do you agree that compassion and concern for social justice which removes Jesus from the equation is a reflection of a doubt that Jesus is who He says He is? How do we advocate for these concerns while also reflecting that Jesus is who He says He is?

6. Do you share the idea that the most tolerant in society are typically the most intolerant?

7. Scott references Romans 1… what were your thoughts and how does it apply to the Progressive movement and the general worldview today?

8. Do you sense the issues that Scott references are occurring due to the breakdown of relational norms and standards? If so, how have you seen that in your day-to-day life?

Fear isn't a sin, but our response to it can be. Sometimes we have to march forward even though we are afraid.

In this episode, we talk about pursuing a sound and healthy mind by saturating our thoughts in the word of God instead of the headlines.

1. Scott shared his thoughts about all the talk about the virus. Where are you at with the conversation about COVID? Are you tired, afraid, something else

2. As a whole, we seem to have no goals or target or clear objective when it comes to dealing with COVID, and without that limiting principle we're looking at ongoing and changing restrictions. Some people fear the virus, others are more concerned with the government's response. Where do you land on that spectrum and why?

3. Whether it's the current era or earlier in life, in what ways have you seen fear become a controlling force in your experience?

4. After World War II, the new reality of the atomic bomb created a growing fear of the potential for destruction. C.S. Lewis landed with a conclusion that we are live in a world that constantly presents danger, whether we are aware or not. He said we ought to, in response, be found "doing sensible things like praying, working, teaching, reading, playing, or chatting with our friends, not huddled together like frightened sheep..." What might this solution accomplish? How might you implement it in your life, family, relationships?

5. Fear isn't sin, but it's a breeding ground for sin. Our response to fear is of the biggest concern. Take a look at 2 Timothy 1:7. Paul suggested that the pursuit of a sound and healthy mind is the antidote to fear. In what ways do we pursue things that end with fear? How could we align, instead, with this scripture in 2 Timothy?

6. Scott suggested that, whether you are doing it mindlessly or intentionally, stop seeking out news that feeds fear. In what ways have you seen the media create fear? What does the media gain from promoting fear?

7. Scott also nudged us to connect with people who aren't fearful. How can this help us to also leave fear behind? Do you know someone who fits this description? Make a plan to connect with them and talk about this topic.

Why in the last decade, has the diagnosis "gender dysphoria" transformed from a vanishingly rare affliction, applying almost exclusively to boys and men, to an epidemic among teenage girls?

We are all disordered in some way because of sin - we all have sins and struggles and thoughts and feelings that don't correspond to truth and reality. Our challenge is not to conform to the patterns of this world but to be transformed by the renewing of our mind (Romans 12:2)

In this episode, Scott reads and reflects from Irreversible Damage: the Transgender Craze Seducing Our Daughters, by Abigail Shrier.

1) What did you think about Scott's opening analogy about a girl going to the doctor for anorexia, where the doctor affirmed all of her thinking that she was in fact fat, even though she was severely underweight by medical standards? Do you think this is a good analogy for the issue of gender dysphoria, and what is currently happening in our culture?
2) Scott pointed out that in Abigail Shrier's book "Irreversible Damage: The Transgender Craze Seducing our Daughters", she says that before 2012, there was no scientific literature on girls (ages 11-21) ever experiencing gender dysphoria. Before that, it affected .01 percent of the entire population, and that number was nearly exclusively boys. Why do you think there is this explosion of talk about this issue and apparently people experiencing it in the last several years?
3) In the book, Shrier offers some thoughts about why this shift in identifying as transgender is happening. She mentioned that it's mostly upper-middle-class white girls and that they may be trying to carve out a niche of rebellion or be able to identify as minorities. What do you think about that? Agree? Disagree? Why?
4) She also said that many of these kids come from progressive families, raised with few walls, so they hunt for barriers to knock down. Have you seen this happening with your own children? Children/teenagers/young adults you know? What do you think they really are looking for? What do they need?
5) She also mentions our modern-day obsession with mental health. Medicating everyone toward the optimal level of happiness. Is this dangerous? Are we shooting ourselves in the foot by not allowing people to just deal with tough emotions? Where does that lead us if we continue that pattern of just looking for a quick fix to treat our "symptoms"?
6) Have you ever thought about how you would handle it if one of your children voiced that they identify as a different gender? It's easy to point fingers and judge from a far-off perspective, but what if it happened to you? What do you do? What truths from scripture would you rely on in helping?

How does the world around us handle sin, offenses and shortcomings? How should we as Christ-followers handle the presence of sin in our world? Should we join in the stone-throwing?

In this episode we'll explore how we must address the sin in our own lives, and then we can help our brother and sister out.

1. Scott starts off our discussion today with an example of the way our cultural model tells us to handle perceived injustices or infractions. Have you seen situations where this model has played out? Were the outcomes positive or negative?
2. The current model of dealing with faults is described as a four step process. Which step do you feel pushes a conversation or interaction towards hopelessness the most?
3. Narratives are mentioned several times in our discussion, what narratives are you struggling to navigate, or which have you encountered recently? How can we redeem these narratives?
4. Christians have started to follow the path of culture in virtue-signalling and cancelling, almost as a knee-jerk reaction or as retribution for what they perceive as cancelling towards Christianity. What aspects of the way culture handles these situations can entrap a Christian?
5. Matthew 7 and John 3:17 illustrate the way God views unchecked judgemental behavior, and 1 Corinthians 13 illustrates His model for love and grace. How can we use these ideas to create a new model for dealing with perceived injustices?
6. Jesus tells us to start with our own hearts, and some have asserted that Christians jump onto the piling-on method in order to avoid facing their own sins. What sins are you downplaying or refusing to address? Do you ever find yourself lashing out at others due to the frustration those sins bring?
7. Scott says God didn't move on after addressing our sin, He moved IN. Reflecting on this, how can we move IN when someone is on the receiving end of society's model for confronting wrongdoings?

In this week's episode we wrap up our discussion on race: responding instead of reacting, and how as Christ-followers, the ball is in our court.

1) What is your understanding of "intersectionality"? How does looking through the lens of intersectionality affect interactions with people? How has it affected conversations in your experience, recently or in the past?
2) Why do you believe so many churches are recently prioritizing diversity as their main mission? What do you think the mission of the church should be? What does the Bible have to say about that mission?
3) Ariea said, "It would do your church no good to be diverse with all different types of ethnicity and no one saved." Is there anything in your life that you are striving for in place of bringing people to Jesus?
4) Rod stated, "Fear stands for: False Evidence Appearing Real." What is appearing real to you that is causing you to be afraid? What's true and what's false in the way you're processing this situation/threat in your world? Identify the "false evidence" and take a moment to intentionally choose to reject the lies. Share your commitment with your group or a trusted friend.
5) Is there anyone in your life who has permission to challenge you even if the challenge is offensive?
6) Who can you ask to mentor you? Is there someone you can speak life into?

This week's episode picks up where we left off with Ariea, Rod, and Scott discussing race and how we as Christ followers can approach reconciliation.

1) When you hear "Solution for Racism" what emotions are stirred up? Do you feel like the conversation will be a positive or a negative one? Will the conversation be civil?
2) Scott Ariea and Rod discuss their solution for racism—fathers in the house and strong male leadership. Rod says that you need examples of how to Look, Live and Love like Jesus as a youth growing up. How might a community transform when there are examples of male leadership in households?
3) In the discussion we hear a call back to the thought that: "We are most helpful to the world when we look least like the world". Do you find it hard to avoid looking like the world when discussing issues of large concern like race? Does this difficulty stem from a disconnect between how things are handled for world concerns versus spiritual concerns? If so, how?
4) Rod tells us a story from his past and that he told his football team. "You gotta do your best, regardless of if I do my best." Do you hear the argument that certain crimes are way more prevalent, like "white on black" or "black on black"? Have you found yourself or people in your life falling into the trap of "if they improve I will improve," or, "if they'd improve the other side of the situation would improve"?
5) You have to understand the necessity of the cross before you can understand or get involved in reconciliation. Review Ephesians 2:11-22. Through a lens of trying to mend racism, what new takeaways did you find in this passage?
6) Scott, Ariea, and Rod agree: Critical Race Theory is a worldview focusing on the oppressed becoming the oppressor. Critical Race Theory is also described as an attempt to fix a sin problem with a sin problem. Do you agree that the endgame for CRT sees the oppressed becoming the oppressor? Can a solution borne out of a sinful world mend a heart-problem like racism?
7) The guys say that changing the law, changing context, and pushing theories does not change a racist heart; only Jesus changes a racist heart. How can we take this to task in our own lives and ask Jesus to start changing the prejudiced hearts around us?

In this episode Scott sits down with friends Ariea King and Rod Butler to discuss the subject of race: how it has shaped our lives and how we as Christ followers can move forward.

1) The guys provided their definitions of racism early in this episode. How would you define racism?
2) What, do you believe, is really the root problem behind racism? What is it that people are scared of, insecure about, or just don't understand that makes them view people of a different race as anything less than themselves?
3) Have you ever experienced racism, or have you ever come to the realization that some of your thoughts and beliefs might be what some would consider racist? This is a question that requires us to be very transparent, self-aware, and to have humility. Who can share?
4) The guys had a conversation about how not all black people have the same experience just based on the color of their skin. How did that conversation strike you? Where do we need to allow for more diversity of thought and experience? Should our race even play into the discussion?
5) Rod talked about how a lot of white people reached out to him in the wake of some of the events and racial tensions over the last year or so. He mentioned that some of that came across as "virtue signaling". Virtue signaling means it is more about the person asking the question than it is about the person answering the question. How can we be more proactive when it comes to understanding people's differences?
6) As Christians, people should be able to look to us as peace-makers—and as people who are empathetic and compassionate. Often, we don't set the example or set the pace when it comes to leading well through misunderstandings and tensions. What is something you can commit to doing to help you grow as someone who can lead well through things like racial tension?
7) The Bible has some strong words about hate. In your Bible app on your phone, do a search for the word "hate" and read some of the search results together. Do the same with the word "love", recognizing that there are no conditions to God's love, and that His expectation is for us to love people the way He loves us!

Jon joins Scott to reflect on the topics we've covered this season and lessons learned from his own marriage.

1. Marriage and parenting teach us a ton. But especially help us grow to be selfless in a way nothing else can. Why do you think this is true? How have you experienced this kind of transformation in your life?
2. Marriage is a visible demonstration of the love of God for people. Marriage apart from the picture of Christ and His bride isn't going to find fulfillment. How can we intentionally pursue this biblical picture of marriage?
3. Which of Jon's tips for building a strong marriage have been helpful to you? Which do you want or need to pursue? Take your time and learn from older couples. Pray a lot. Serve together. Invest in the church. Be realistic with financial expectations. Work on conflict resolution. Invest in relationships with a few other couples.
4. What is it about sharing a meal together with the people we love that transforms us? How does it build your family's relationships? What is accomplished by sharing this space?
5. In the Bible, the Book of Psalms is like a medicine cabinet. If you need words to express your emotion or feeling, you can find it there. Share how God's words have helped you express emotions, whether they've been painful or joy-filled. What are you walking through in this season that could use help from the Psalms to express in words?
6. God chose us. Handpicked us. Adopted us into His family. Adoption is a theme in the NT. If God did that for us, He'd want that for all of us. How can churches help even more families adopt? How could you help personally, financially and otherwise?
7. Considering divorce? Apologize. Forgive. Own what you did. Give it time. Build and rebuild trust. You may have biblical grounds for divorce, but you're not required to take this step. Where can you reach out for help?
8. Remember: Everyone in your family is going to die eventually. Prepare as you're able but it's never going to be easy. The marriage vow, "In sickness and in health," reminds us to enjoy what we have today. How can you actively and verbally express your gratitude for the people in your life today?
9. Resilience is something this world needs; the ability to stand in the face of sickness, difficulty, loss. Two are better than one; two becoming one. There's a strength and joy infused into your life when two people are faithful to Him and to each other. Take time to craft a clear statement of your intent to be faithful… in your marriage, friendships, parenting, work… everywhere. Share with your group via email this week.

Scott Hatfield returns for this episode of Locker Room to talk about those important words many of us have said in our vows, "...in sickness and in health."

Scott and his wife Sarah have walked through many tough seasons over the 27 years of their marriage.

1. Everyone has a unique story about how they met their wife. Share your story or, if not married, where you're at in the journey toward marriage.
2. Hatfield was led by God to make some decisions relationally that paved the way for his marriage to Sarah. How do prayer, worship, and God's word feed into your own relational world?
3. As you heard Hatfield share his story, which parts of their "adventures together" resonated most to encourage, challenge, or inspire you?
4. Sarah jokes that she was in great health and perfect condition before she and Scott met. They quickly faced challenges that required faithfulness to their vow: "In sickness and in health." How has this vow, or another wedding vow, been a challenge and/or an anchor in your life?
5. Both Nickell and Hatfield compiled a list of "learnings" from going through challenges and hard times: We're more selfish than we know; If we could change it we would; Sometimes it takes counseling; The church is an amazing family; The husband is called to be Jesus to his bride. Which of them are lessons you have learned? Which ones do you want or need to learn?
6. Hatfield shared several great bits of advice for thriving in marriage. Which of these do you sense God wants you to implement in your marriage? Worship together; Leave it all on the field; Do what it takes; Don't hit the eject button; Lay down your expectations.
7. How do you need to ask God to work in you, your life, your relationships, and/or your marriage this week? Do that now.

In our walk following Jesus, we have enemies. But our enemy is not only Satan and demons. We have another enemy that is even closer. If you want to know the other big enemy standing in the way of what God wants to do in your life…take your finger and touch your chest. It's you. It's our flesh.

We all have an inclination to buck against authority and rebel against God. We see it rooted in Adam and Eve's disobedience. It manifests itself as selfish desires, inclinations toward evil, and an inability to perfectly follow God's will. We're locked in an internal struggle between doing what we want and doing what is right, requiring spiritual rebirth through Christ for transformation. For the Godly man, it's an internal struggle between doing what we want and what is right, requiring spiritual rebirth through Christ for transformation.

Our guest this week, Matt Robison has a powerful story from the trenches, fighting the battle of drug and alcohol addiction. Matt shares how choices and circumstances led him to the bottom, and how by trusting in God and the Holy Spirit for each step—even after relapses—he has retaken ground in both his own life and that of his family.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

Opening:

• Where are you winning this week?

Discussion:

Matt talks about the difference of recovery being between abstinence and healing. Why is it so important to distinguish between the two?

Matt talks about doing good things out of a faulty performance mindset. What's the danger in doing good things out of a performance mindset?

Read 2 Corinthians 12:6-10. What sticks out to you about how God responds to Paul's weakness?

Matt touches on the physical, emotional, and spiritual aspects of healing addiction. Why is it so important to address all three instead of just one?

Matt mentions a common belief especially amongst men: "I have to perform to be valuable." When have you felt this way? Where does that belief come from?

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. It's really hard when your heart is broke, your mind is sick, and your soul is covered with shame." What part of you feels most broken right now, and how is that affecting your relationship with God?

"Jesus is more interested in the wounds behind the sin than he is in the behaviors." We often focus on stopping sinful behaviors while ignoring the deeper wounds underneath. What would it look like to bring those wounds from the past to Jesus, instead of just trying harder to change?

What's a habit in your life that keeps you from God's best? What's a sin that the enemy is using to blanket you in shame with? What is your next step of obedience? 

Resources 

• AA…AA's are everywhere.  We have AA's that meet at three of our campuses—NIC, LEX & GEO.  Please reach out and we'll help you get connected to them if you're interested. 

• There's also a Christian Recovery Program at a lot of churches all over our city, all over the country called Celebrate Recovery. That's a great Christian program that's making a huge impact.  

• We also have a long list of guys that are in our church that have battled alcohol addiction and they're sober and would be honored to walk beside you, share their story and help you in any way that they can. 

• Book by John Ortberg, called Steps (A guide to transforming your life when willpower isn't enough).   

• If you're interested in another podcast on addiction, I had one of the men in our church named Mike Mueller on.  Locker Room episode, Southland Men:  Mike Mueller (The View From Rock Bottom)—March 28th, 2025.  

 Wrap Up 

• If this podcast has encouraged you—we'd love to hear from you. 

• If you're wrestling with Christianity, interested in getting baptized or need help figuring out your next step, want to get in touch with Matt Robison…shoot us an email at lockerroom@southland.church.  

• As always…if this podcast has encouraged you—share it with a friend.  You never know how an episode like this can help those in your life that you care about.

• Thanks for listening.  Get after it!  We'll catch you next time on Locker Room.      

Kevin Comp joins Scott on this episode of Locker Room to share his story. Kevin was married and divorced early in life and went on to work through pain, forgiveness and redemption.

Kevin serves as the Campus Pastor for Southland's Georgetown location. He has been married to his wife Stacey for 21 years and they have 3 children.

1. Kevin mentioned that Middle School age is a very formative time. What were the positive and negative influences on your life in Middle School that had long-lasting effects?
2. Kevin mentioned that being a "workaholic" was really an excuse to hide from his leadership role at home. How does that quote resonate with you? What other leadership roles might we tend to hide from?
3. Bob Cherry took Kevin out to lunch after his divorce and showed him grace. Who has shown you grace in some of your lowest moments?
4. Have you ever wrestled with the tension of knowing God's grace covers others but having trouble believing it to be true about yourself?
5. Have you ever felt like God was "done with you"? How can we go deeper with our understanding of God's grace and unlimited power over our past and for our future?
6. What is an area of your life or a relationship you have that needs restoration?
7. How has God grown and matured your faith in Him over the years? What were the ups and downs of that journey?
8. How can the group be praying for you this week?

In this episode, Scott sits down with Nathan Head and Jason Eaton to discuss how their marriages and families have grown through choosing to adopt.

1. How did you and your spouse meet? How long have you been married? Do you have kids? If so how many?
2. For those with kids: Did you always want kids? For those without kids: How many kids do you want? What are your thoughts, fears, excitements about having kids?
3. How does hearing Nate and Jason talk about their adoption processes shed light on the power of what the Bible says about God adopting us into His family?
4. Scott mentioned the C.S. Lewis quote, "All love involves risk." How has this been true in your marriage? In your parenting?
5. Going through the adoption process requires radical dependence upon God for everything. What are you currently needing to radically depend on God for?
6. Nate mentioned "the adversity you face will make you stronger because it becomes a bond of intimacy that otherwise would not be created." How has this been true for you in regards to marriage and parenting?

On this episode Austin Ketron joins Scott to talk about what it looks like to build a marriage out of the rubble of addiction and recovery.

Austin and Monique have been married for 8 years and have four children, and now focus on building into their family and helping others.

1. Austin was very transparent and vulnerable about his past and struggles. Do you feel like you have a safe place to be known? Or do you feel like you have to pretend and manage your image? Have you ever worried about being found out as a fraud?
2. How have you struggled with addiction? Whether it be alcohol, substance, sex, pornography, greed, etc. Where do you stand in recovery? And what did that process look like?
3. God often works in ways we never imagined. Share some of those with the group.
4. At some moments, it can be hard to see God's hand and provision. But years later it can be very obvious. Where have you seen God's faithfulness in your past to bring about healing and wholeness?
5. How do you wrestle with the tension of being at a weak moment, while still performing and executing daily responsibilities?
6. What does your daily prayer and time in the Bible look like?
7. How can this group help you the most with keeping you accountable while encouraging you to pursue Jesus in all things?