Today’s conversation is a heavier one, and I want to say that up front: if you’re not in a place to take it in, it’s okay to skip this one and come back when you’re ready. I’m joined by Kayleigh Summers, a licensed clinical social worker, perinatal trauma specialist, amniotic fluid embolism (AFE) survivor, and the voice behind The Birth Trauma Mama. She shares how her own experience shaped the work she does now, and we talk about what it looks like to prepare for birth with hope at the center while still making room for the “what ifs.” We get into what Kayleigh calls catastrophic birth planning: not as a way to plan for the worst, but as a way to have a say in situations where you might not be able to speak for yourself. We also talk about why that preparation matters for partners, who may end up making the big decisions, and we cover the gift of putting your wishes in a notes app and sharing it with someone you trust.
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I also wanted this to be real and practical. AFE is incredibly rare, about 1 in 40,000 births, and Kayleigh and I both agree that “it won’t happen to you” isn’t a helpful thing to hear.
We talk about:
- How to ask your provider what protocols and training they have in place
- How to respond when a question gets brushed off
- Why you don’t have to deliver at any particular type of hospital to be doing this “right”
- Keeping your awareness on the shelf instead of letting it take over your feed
- The reminder that surviving something hard doesn’t mean you owe the world anything
If you’re a provider, Kayleigh shares a free course through the AFE Foundation, and I’ll link it, along with her website, podcast, and social handles, in the show notes. Wherever you are in your own prep, I hope you walk away feeling a little more informed, a little less alone, and still free to get excited about the parts of your birth you’re hoping for.
Mentioned in this episode:
Course Name: AFE: A Practical Approach Course
The AFE Foundation Contact hotline is 1-307-363-2337 (or 1-307-END-AFES)
More from Kaleigh Summers, LCSW, PMH-C:
Visit thebirthtraumamama.com
Follow her on Instagram & TikTok: @thebirthtrauma_mama
Listen to her podcast: The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast
Helpful Timestamps:
- 00:00 Meet Kayleigh Summers
- 05:15 AFE and Emergency C-Section
- 11:41 Why She Started Sharing
- 16:45 Privilege and Access to Care
- 19:08 Catastrophic Birth Planning
- 29:14 Partner Decision Burden
- 33:20 Questions for Your OB
- 39:14 Preparedness Without Doomscrolling
- 41:10 Provider Resources and Hotline
About your host:
Lo Mansfield, MSN, RNC-OB, CLC is a registered nurse, mama of 4, and a birth, baby, and motherhood enthusiast. She is both the host of the Lo & Behold podcast and the founder of The Labor Mama.
For more education, support and “me too” from Lo, please visit her website and check out her online courses and digital guides for birth, breastfeeding, and postpartum/newborns. You can also follow @thelabormama and @loandbehold_thepodcast on Instagram and join her email list here.
For more pregnancy, birth, postpartum and motherhood conversation each week, be sure to subscribe to The Lo & Behold podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you prefer to listen!
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Disclaimer
Opinions shared by guests of this show are their own, and do not always reflect those of The Labor Mama platform. Additionally, the information you hear on this podcast or that you receive via any linked resources should not be considered medical advice. Please see our full disclaimer here.
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Produced and Edited by Vaden Podcast Services
Mentioned in this episode:
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