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Explore every episode of the podcast Latter Day Struggles

Dive into the complete episode list for Latter Day Struggles. Each episode is cataloged with detailed descriptions, making it easy to find and explore specific topics. Keep track of all episodes from your favorite podcast and never miss a moment of insightful content.

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TitlePub. DateDuration
🔒 258: Introducing "ASK VAL ANYTHING!"06 Sep 202400:50:05

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Hey, amazing Friday subscribers! You have questions? Val has responses! For the next few Fridays (and other Fridays in the future) she’ll be answering YOUR questions. 

This episode’s questions:
- What are your thoughts about Gods controlling things and letting bad things happen to us? 
- How can I best support my significant other who feels he has lost all footing in or with the church? 
- What are the most life changing books you have read and why? 

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257: Creating Communities of Unconditional Belonging with Aubrey Chaves02 Sep 202401:22:14

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Join Valerie and fellow podcaster Aubrey Chaves of the Faith Matters podcast as together they discuss the vision and purpose of the Restore Conference. 

A common belief among these two brave and compassionate women? 
True growth and connection is about being welcome and accepted wherever you are on your faith journey.  No fine print. 

In their unique ways each are involved in efforts for their LDS and surrounding fellow travelers. Listen in to hear why they are so committed to this work! 

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🔒 248: Honoring & Expanding Spiritual Experiences Post LDS Faith Crisis02 Aug 202400:41:37

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Series Title: Redefining Spiritual Experiences [Part II of II]

In this episode, Valerie and Nathan continue making sense of the struggle that many faith-expanding LDS (and surrounding) people have regarding past and present spiritual experiences. 

Sharing personal experiences of their own faith journeys, they open up about how their relationship to spiritual impressions, prayer, and personal revelation has moved from isolated experiences to more of an acknowledgement of ongoing divine connection. 

The episode ends with a conversation about how families can continue to work toward unity and community even when different family members' perspectives and interpretations of spiritual experience and personal revelation vastly differ. 

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161: Young Adults Want the Hard Conversations w/ Patrick Mason02 Oct 202300:59:21

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Series Title: Guiding & Trusting LDS Young Adults as They Navigate their Faith [Part I of II]

Welcome to a beautiful two-part conversation between Valerie and Patrick Mason, who talk about the often-unaddressed issue of conflict in religious congregations and how tough conversations can be turned around to propel spiritual growth. 

Patrick has a unique perspective in this issue as a university professor who has recently begun holding gatherings in his home, helping young adults in and around the LDS church feel safe in their honest enquiries around spirituality in general and the LDS faith in specific. 

Valerie and Patrick traverse complex terrain, discussing the fear of constructive conflict within the Latter-day Saint community that often stifles genuine spiritual ministering and growth. Patrick examines this cultural practice, arguing that conflict can and should be seen as an opportunity for growth rather than a threat to unity and peace.

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🔒 160: Why Scientific & Academic Inquiry IS Spiritual Seeking!29 Sep 202300:43:09

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 Series Title: Analysis of E. Corbridge's BYU Devotional “Stand Forever [Part II of II]


In this second half of a series tackling E Corbridge’s talk titled “Stand Forever”, Val and Nathan’s address the following: 

  • How in their opinion scientific and other academic inquiry IS spiritual in nature 
  • Why all questions are viable, valuable, and ought to be welcomed 
  • How doubt is evidence of spiritual questing and courage
  • A proposal that if there *were* only one question guiding our discipleship, it ought to be centered in how aligned are we with Christ’s embodiment of love 

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159: LDS University Students Pressured to Not Ask Hard Questions25 Sep 202300:40:41

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 Series Title: Analysis of E.Corbridge BYU Devotional “Stand Forever [Part I of II]


In the next two episodes Valerie and Nathan respond to a BYU address titled “Stand Forever” by E. Corbridge, where he proposes to university students that there are only four questions that even matter in one’s quest for spiritual knowledge in the LDS church. 

According to him, once these “primary questions” are answered, no “secondary questions” need be asked. 

In this series Valerie and Nathan challenge both the proposed four “primary questions” themselves and the premise that it is wrong to enquire about anything related to our unique faith journeys. 

FRIDAY’S episode tackles Val’s and Nathan’s responded to E Corbridge’s proposal that scientific and other academic inquiry is not spiritual in nature and explore why the experience of doubt is evidence of spiritual questing and courage.

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🔒 158: Letting Go of the ‘Mormon Parenting Scoreboard' w/ Christian Kimball22 Sep 202301:02:48

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Series Title: “On the Inside of the Edge” Exploration w/ Christian Kimball [Part IV of IV]

In this final episode in this mini-series featuring Chris Kimball’s book ⁠Living on the Inside of the Edge, Chris and Val close with a sensitive topic of so many of us on the peripheries of the LDS faith tradition.  

Both parents to children ranging from adolescents to mid-adulthood, Val and Chris share thoughts about the “Mormon Scoreboard” and how this scoring system hurts both parents and their children.

They share their own tender experiences navigating parenting, realizing that while their faith journeys complicated their parenting identities, ultimately they had no choice in the matter and their deepening faith was something that strengthened their ability to love their children and allow their children their own beautiful journeys too.

Chris and Valerie talk about fears that they have or have overcome in raising their children on the edge, knowing that others may well see them and/or their children as failures on the Mormon scoreboard.

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157: The Spiritual Dangers of Magical Thinking w/ Christian Kimball18 Sep 202300:35:40

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Series Title: “On the Inside of the Edge” Exploration w/ Christian Kimball [Part III of IV]

In this episode Chris and Val talk about dangers of MAGICAL THINKING and how pervasive this is in the LDS church.  They discuss how compelling a transactional understanding of life might feel (as all people crave certainty) but how damaging this is when churches offer simple if/then promises that crumble for many of us when things fall apart. 

What follows failed promises made by well-meaning loved ones and churches?  Not only the despair of the loss (the death, failed marriage, etc.) but also the despair that the whole system upon which one believes in God does not work.  

Friday’s closing episode of this series is a tender conversation about parenting on the edge.  Chris and Valerie talk about fears that they have or have overcome in raising their children on the edge, knowing that others may well see them and/or their children as failures on the Mormon scoreboard.Info on how to subscribe to listen to Friday’s episode is directly below.  See you there!

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🔒 156: From Baring your Shoulder to Bearing your Testimony w/ Christian Kimball15 Sep 202300:51:48

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Series Title: “On the Inside of the Edge” Exploration w/ Christian Kimball [Part II of IV]

In this second episode in the mini-series featuring Chris Kimball’s book Living on the Inside of the Edge, Chris and Val talk about the crucial role that personal differentiation plays in having a healthy relationship with the LDS church.  

Put simply, we must all grow up and practice having an adult-to-adult relationship in a culture that sometimes encourages more of a child-to-adult relationship.  They cover everything from Bishop’s interviews to managing the anxiety of breaking benign but significant social codes of this faith community, and doing so from a place that honors the ongoing tension that humans long for both belonging to a community and belonging to themselves. 


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155: LDS Church as Neither Magic Kingdom nor Evil Empire w/ Christian Kimball11 Sep 202300:52:41

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 Series Title: “On the Inside of the Edge” Exploration w/ Christian Kimball [Part I of IV]

Welcome to the first of a WONDERFUL four-part mini series with guest Christian Kimball, author of the beautiful book Living on the Inside of the Edge.   

In today’s episode Chris and Val will focus on the topic of how prone we as Latter Day Saints (as are others in early stage spiritual and psychological development) are to think in BINARIES:  good/bad, right/wrong, in/out. 

Their invitation is to break out of binary-thinking and begin to see your relationship with the church on your own terms, emphasizing that your relationship with your current spiritual practice WILL CHANGE, because our life’s experiences change us all.  

In Friday’s episode Val and Chris focus on finally *truly* growing up in our relationship with the church! This episode digs into the concept of obtaining a differentiated [read: adult-to -adult] relationship with the church and how this adult-to-adult dynamic might look on the ground in real life relationships, especially with your bishop. 

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🔒 154: The Internal & Relationship Anguish of LDS Faith Crisis09 Sep 202300:36:33

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Series Title: Valerie’s 2023 Sunstone Symposium Address [Part II of II]

In this episode Valerie shares the second half of one of her  2023 Sunstone Symposium  addresses focused on her findings following hundreds of intense hours working with members of the LDS church in faith and trust crisis this past year.  

These observations might be of particular interest as they come exactly 10 years following the creation of an exhaustive report (linked in full below) created for (then) President Dieter F. Uchtdorf as a way to help LDS general authorities better understand the nature of the suffering of so many members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints in faith and trust crises.  

Valerie’s analysis in today’s episode covers the following (among other things):

  • The typical internal traumatic experience of individuals in early LDS faith and trust crisis.
  • The relational/interpersonal struggles of those in LDS faith and trust crisis. 
  • The psychological interventions that Valerie uses to help people heal from the trauma of faith and trust crisis. 
  • How people look and feel as they heal from this experience both in relationship to themselves, others, and the LDS church.

Please feel welcome to join one of Valerie’s space-limited Faith Crisis and Expansion support and processing groups.  As a trauma therapist she continues to help our LDS faith expansion community become psychologically healthier and spiritually well in and around the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  Enroll at latterdaystruggles.com. 

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153: The State of LDS Faith Crisis Ten Years Post 2014 Official “Faith Crisis Report” Research04 Sep 202300:45:26

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Series Title: Valerie’s 2023 Sunstone Symposium Address [Part I of II]

In the next two episodes Valerie will share with you her findings following hundreds of intense hours working with members of the LDS church in faith and trust crisis this past year since she opened up her first growth, processing, and support groups as a trauma therapist serving her own faith community.

These observations might be of particular interest as they come exactly 10 years following the creation of an exhaustive report (linked in full below) created for (then President) Dieter F. Uchtdorf as a way to help LDS general authorities better understand the nature of the suffering of so many members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints in faith and trust crises.

Valerie’s analysis in this episode and Friday’s episodes covers the following (among other things):

  •  The current main causes of LDS faith and trust crisis
  •  The emergence of some issues in 2023 that were less prominent in 2013
  •  What people in faith and trust crisis generally are experiencing from a psychological perspective
  •  The relational suffering of those in LDS faith and trust crisis due to the standard rhetoric about “those who doubt”
  •  The psychological interventions that Valerie uses to help people heal from the trauma of faith and trust crisis
  •  How people look and feel as they heal from this experience both in relationship to themselves, others, and the LDS church

Valerie feels a deep personal commitment to help each person who comes to this platform.  Thank you for trusting this platform as you work through this challenging but ultimately rewarding experience of spiritual growth! 

Faith Crisis Report: https://faenrandir.github.io/a_careful_examination/documents/faith_crisis_study/Faith_Crisis_R28e.pdf?fbclid=IwAR0HEjV8dDVB9J1__x6ISIgHBRFw5TL06l-mr38edrjdAqbVZbp7Ox2ZvuU&fs=e&s=cl&fs=e&s=cl


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🔒 152: A Feminist Version of 'Work for the Dead' w/ Carol Lynn Pearson01 Sep 202301:08:25

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Series Title: Tribute to Carol Lynn Pearson's Groundbreaking Play "Mother Wove with Morning" [Part II of II]

In this episode Valerie is joined by feminist and queer rights author, poet, and activist Carol Lynn Pearson honoring women throughout time who have sought the feminine divine.  

Carol Lynn’s classic one-woman play “Mother Wove the Morning” is an invitation to walk back in time and learn how women always have sought their Mother. 

Carol Lynn feels that perhaps a most sacred “work for the dead” we can each do is honor and follow those who have gone before us in their search of the lost feminine divine.  

She does this very thing with a dramatic flare in both her full length play (linked at the bottom of show notes for purchase on her website) and through her performance of a part of this theatrical work right here on today’s episode.  

If you have ever loved the creative flair of Carol Lynn, this episode will having you smiling with love and gratitude for her passion, talent, and feminist ministry. 

Please enjoy the ENTIRE PLAY and SCRIPT available for purchase at carollynnpearson.com where she also has a myriad of other books that will delight and educate you about many important issues of our day.


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247: Processing Former Spiritual Experiences after LDS Faith Crisis29 Jul 202400:53:02

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Series Title: Redefining Spiritual Experiences [Part I of II]

In this episode of Latter Day Struggles, Valerie and Nathan respond to a very common question that people in early faith crisis often ask:  "What do I make of my former spiritual experiences?"  

This two part series tackles many aspects of this perplexing aspect of faith expansion.  Val and Nathan talk about the feelings of confusion that many feel about early faith defining experiences.  They talk about other feelings that come including mistrust in oneself, one's feelings, one's former answers, one's capacity to get guidance, and sometimes mistrust in God. 

They offer thoughts around how many of us were taught to discern truth and how the spiritual journey is all about working through past experiences, emotions, and interpretations of our experiences as necessary for our growth into spiritually complex beings.  

You definitely won't want to miss Part II in this Friday’s subscriber-exclusive episode either, where Valerie and Nathan delve deeper into how to move from a transactional relationship with God that was often connected to former spiritual experiences and how the faith journey is about expanding one's capacity to embody spiritual experiences rather than just having them.  

They also touch on how to navigate relationship impasses with others who cannot understand our journeys due to their own spiritual experiences.  

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151: In Search of Mother God w/ Carol Lynn Pearson28 Aug 202300:43:47

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Series Title: Tribute to Carol Lynn Pearson's Groundbreaking Play "Mother Wove with Morning" [Part I of II]

Following last week’s deep dive into the talk “To the Mothers in Zion”, you are likely struck by the need to better understand the fraught roll of women in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints in the 20th and 21st century.

However, the struggle to understand the unequal status of women is not just an LDS in nature.  It is MUCH bigger than that.  And it is deeply connected to the loss of our collective knowledge of the feminine divine.

This is what this week’s Latter Day Struggles episodes plans to explore.

And who better to take us on this journey than own beloved poet laureate, author, and feminist extraordinaire—Carol Lynn Pearson.

The specific topic of this two-episode series is Carol Lynn’s one-woman play titled “Mother Wove the Morning”.

In Carol Lynn’s typically beautiful and dramatic way, we learn all about women throughout the ages their ongoing search for the divine face of God.

Monday’s episode offers context to the creation of this play—her personal experiences that led up to the realization of this idea, where, how, when it was performed and how it was received.

She shares her experience deciding to address the feminine divine in an era where feminist and heavenly mother scholarship was under the critical scrutiny from the leadership of the church and how she decided to answer the call notwithstanding the risks.

In Friday’s episode Carol Lynn will delight us all with an overview of the cast of characters whom she selected to perform through her and actually performs a portion of the play for us all to enjoy!

If you loved the little portion that you heard on the podcast, don’t hesitate to go to her website carollynnpearson.com and buy the entire play and the book that goes with it.  It is time for a resurrection of this amazing one-woman play in the ongoing celebration of the feminine face of God with whom so many of us are finding deep connection.


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🔒 150: Accessing the Impact of "To the Mothers in Zion" w/ Dr. Julie Hanks25 Aug 202301:21:54

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Series Title: Analysis of Ezra Taft Benson's "To the Mothers in Zion" Infamous Address [Part II of II]

Join Valerie and fellow therapist Dr. Julie Hanks for a heartfelt conversation about the address given in 1987 by Ezra Taft Benson called “To the Mother’s of Zion”, which impacted thousands of women’s experiences of motherhood for decades.

Julie and Valerie are LDS women, wives, and mothers themselves and were in their adolescence when this address was given, eventually becoming the position statement for acceptable womanhood in the LDS church for decades.

In this episode they reflect on the profound impact this talk had on their lives as young, highly motivated, but devoted-to-the-church women, navigating the complexities of emerging womanhood, their own personal hopes and dreams, and desires for both motherhood and also personal development beyond motherhood.

The fruits of this address for each of them? A lot of guilt, shame, anxiety, and fears that they were "bad” women, mothers, and daughters of God for having desires beyond that of caregiving.

In their typical respectful but direct way, Julie and Val evaluate many teachings from this talk from the perspective of psychological, developmental, spiritual, and relationship health and offer thoughts and feelings about different and healthier ways that we might model a path towards adult womanhood.

The offer hope for a wide open space where women can choose if motherhood is right for them and how motherhood might look if that is the direction they go.

They encourage courage, autonomy, personal authority, and self confidence as the foundation of healthy womanhood—whether that be full-time motherhood, a choice not to be a mother, or motherhood blended with other personal and professional pursuits.

 Every choice is worthy.  Because women are infinitely worthy and capable of choosing for themselves the lives they want to lead.

 The talk addressed in this episode: https://emp.byui.edu/satterfieldb/pdf/tomothersofzion.pdf


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149: Sociopolitical Forces that Led to Ezra Taft Benson's "To the Mothers in Zion"21 Aug 202300:29:56

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Series Title: Analysis of Ezra Taft Benson's "To the Mothers in Zion" Infamous Address [Part I of II]

This week on Latter Day Struggles we are diving into an address that rocked the worlds of many women in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  The talk?  “To the Mother’s in Zion” given by Ezra Taft Benson clear back in 1987.  This talk became a sort of priesthood-directed “Mormon motherhood position statement” for all women of the church for several decades.

To say the very least, it made its mark on thousands of women during this era and beyond.

In today’s episode Valerie offers a truckload of VERY SIGNIFICANT context that will help each of us better understand the reasons for this heavy-handed mandate for women to stay in the home.  Some of the context addressed in this episode includes:

  •  Historical issues that informed Benson’s stance (the Red Scare, the sexual revolution, the feminist movement, the civil rights movement)
  •  The LDS church’s longing to achieve “in-group” status with the Christin conservative Right after a century of polygamy-induced shunning
  •  The LDS church’s commitment to codified gender roles in an effort prevent the spread of homosexuality 
  •  Benson’s own involvement in the ultra-conservative John Birch Society 

In FRIDAY’S episode, Valerie and friend and colleague Julie Hanks together walk through their own formative years as LDS girls and how this talk impacted them personally. They also jump into the address itself and talk about several sections from a psychological, spiritual, and relational health standpoint.   Link to "To the Mother's of Zion" talk: https://emp.byui.edu/satterfieldb/pdf/tomothersofzion.pdf



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🔒 148: How I Might Also Be Marginalizing Someone18 Aug 202300:41:04

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Series Title:  How & Why Power Hierarchies Were Created [Part VI of VI]

In this six part series Val and Nathan took on the daunting task of exploring with you the phenomenon of how human beings since the beginning of time have created systems of dominance.

In the past several episodes they defined why power hierarchies are created, how this plays out in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, and the six-step process followed in creating systems of dominance. They used a variety of examples of what this looks like both within the LDS context and zooming out much broader in time and place.

This week they are ending this series focusing on strategies for change in hopes to awaken our own minds and hearts to how we might contribute to a healing of our own systems where dominance continues to wound those seen as “other”.

TODAY’S final episode of this series breaks down the last few recommendations that we can each integrate into our own growth journeys as we endeavor to become more and more capable of truly loving our fellow humans.

Topics addressed includes ways that we can get involved in speaking up against systemic marginalization and how we can leverage our own self interest in this process—knowing that even if we are currently in a powerful “in-group”, our status could easily change due to any number of life’s circumstances and while this system is in place, we will inevitably eventually be wounded too.


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147: Protecting Those on the Margins Out Loud14 Aug 202300:48:30

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Series Title:  How & Why Power Hierarchies Were Created [Part V of VI]

In today’s and Friday’s (final) episode of this series we will be covering several recommendations given by the brilliant scholar Gerta Lerner on how we as individuals within our own systems can break down hierarchical systems of oppression.

The recommendations explored today are as follows:

  1. Accept differences in others.  Don’t just tolerate them.  Val and Nathan go into some detail about how this might look on the group within the culture and theology of the LDS church.
  2. Once we acknowledge, honor, and accept the differences of unique others  in our individual relationships, allow them to be a complex composite of a a multitude of characteristics (not simply a representative of their grouping that makes them different).
  3. Although we enjoy these loved ones in 1:1 situations and don’t focus on their differences, we DO NOT “move on” in social situations where institutionalized marginalization is taking place.  ***Tune in for much more on this topic!
  4. Personally notice when we move into stigmatizing others.  Val and Nathan talk about how this is such a human self-preserving temptation.

FRIDAY’S final episode of this series breaks down the last few recommendations that we can each integrate into our own growth journeys as we endeavor to become more and more capable of truly loving our fellow humans.  Books referenced in this episode:


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🔒 146: How Hierarchies Hold Onto their Power11 Aug 202300:37:00

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Series Title: How & Why Power Hierarchies Were Created [Part IV of VI]

In this part four of this series studying the psychological phenomenon of the  creation of marginalized populations Val and Nathan tackle the six step process in how populations create power hierarchies and select those over whom they rule.

As a reminder, steps one through three are as follows:

  • Mark the difference between yourself and another type of person
  • Stigmatize the difference
  • Institutionalize the discrimination against stigmatized group

This episode tackles steps four through six: 

  • Allow for exceptions in the stigmatized population
  • Blame the stigmatized group social problems of the culture
  • Turn various oppressed populations against each other by encouraging them to create hierarchies between themselves.  This ensures that they will sustain the larger system of dominance and oppression

The last two episodes of this series explores how individuals can contribute to the reversing of this systemic phenomenon. Each individual's heightened consciousness around issues of hierarchy and oppression slowly moves the world in the direction of increased love and connection.

 Book being referenced in this series: Living with History: Making Social Change by Gerta Lerner


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145: When & Why Diverse People Becomes Marginalized07 Aug 202300:33:44

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Series Title: How & Why Power Hierarchies Were Created [Part III of VI]

Welcome to part three of this diving into why and how human beings create hierarchies of power.  So far in this series we have explained the psychological phenomenon itself, zoomed in on how this plays out on the ground in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and now we are going to spend the next two episodes walking through the six-step process of how humans create those groupings whom we choose to dominate, subjugate, and marginalize.

This episode tackles in detail the first three steps:

  1. Mark the difference in a group of people who are unlike yourself.
  2. Stigmatize the difference.
  3. Institutionalize the discrimination practiced against the group.

FRIDAY’S episode four tackles steps 4-6.

In these next two episodes (today’s and Fridays) Val and Nathan will offer both historical and current examples of how each of these steps in the creation of marginalized “out-group” populations looks both within the LDS faith and in other contexts. 

Get ready to have your mind further expanded.

Referenced in this series: Living with History: Making Social Change by Gerta Lerner

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🔒 144: In-Groups & Out-Groups at a Regular Sacrament Meeting04 Aug 202300:38:11

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Series Title: How & Why Power Hierarchies Were Created [Part II of VI]

In this episode Val and Nathan are going to talk about how the phenomenon of marginalization happens in virtually every collective unless it is consciously addressed.  In an effort to invite healing around this topic in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, they will walk through some historical and current examples such as hierarchical structures around gender, race, and sexuality.

They will then break down how within the LDS church there are a variety of more subtle hierarchies and disempowered out-groups that may seem invisible because they are so entrenched in the culture and theology such as the early-returned missionaries, unwed mothers, and non-temple recommend holders.  

Val and Nathan discuss these and several others to help us all see that our organization has its own idiosyncratic ways of creating “out-groups”…those who deviate from the expectations of the community and therefore are seen as (and often treated as) “other”.

Their desire in shining a light on this phenomenon in this series is to help our community root out the multiple layers of hierarchy to create a community bonded not by hierarchies of powerful in-groups and powerless out-groups, but by equality and Christ-like love.   

Book referenced throughout this series: Living With History: Making Social Change, by Gerta Lerner


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143: How & Why Some People Oppress Others31 Jul 202300:38:48

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Series Title: How & Why Power Hierarchies Were Created [Part I of VI]

In this mini-series Val and Nathan will be covering in-depth one of Val’s recent Sunstone Symposium presentations exploring the psychology around human civilization’s tendency to organize themselves into hierarchies. These hierarchies consist of an empowered group whose authority is dictated by selecting a different group over whom they dominate. These disempowered groups are sometimes called “out-groups” or “deviant others”.

In Episode 1 of this series Val and Nathan will explore why collectives organize themselves into a dominating few who find identity in their rule over designated disempowered out-groups, how those in power use differences in others to dominate them, how some disempowered ‘out groups’ are common throughout time and place [gender, class, race], and how unique out-groups are arbitrarily selected within micro-cultures.

This Friday’s episode Val and Nathan will discuss how this concept applies to hierarchical structures in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, both through macro-issues such as their historical and current struggles with institutional patriarchy, racism, and issues around disempowering gender and sexual minorities.

Their desire in shining a light on this phenomenon in this series is to help our community root out the multiple layers of hierarchy to create a community bonded not by the division between powerful in-groups and powerless out-groups, but by equality and Christ-like love.

Info on how to subscribe to listen to Friday’s episode is directly below.  See you there!


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🔒 142: Our Sacred Imperative to Critique Unrighteous Dominion w/ Taylor Petrey28 Jul 202300:35:01

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Series Title: "Tabernacles of Clay” Analysis with Taylor Petrey [Part IV of IV]

Join Valerie and colleague Taylor Petrey in this final episode of their fascinating series studying Taylor's must-read book "Tabernacles of Clay": a study of the movements of the LDS church in the realm of gender and sexuality spanning the time period beginning post WWII to present.

In this episode Val and Taylor address the following:

  • A mind-bending list of proposed causes and cures forwarded by the LDS Church for homosexuality over the years
  • A list of vastly varying ideas preached by different LDS general leaders about pre-mortal gender, post-mortal gender, and allowed sexual practices--illustrating the extreme shifts and changes in this area in the past 70 years
  • They also explore how an analysis of  Tabernacle’s of Clay makes explicit the tendency for humanity [including the LDS church] to scapegoat a new population of people when another group of people receives recognition for historical marginalization
  • They also address the psychological phenomena of victim becoming persecutor and how this may apply to our church’s historical tendency to marginalize various populations

The book being analyzed in this series: 

Podcast episodes mentioned in this series:


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🔒 246: Personal Reflections on Learning How to Love as God Loves with Steve Young26 Jul 202400:26:45

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Series Title: Moving Beyond the Transactional Gospel [Part II of II]

In this follow up episode Valerie and guest Steve Young delve into more specific examples related to the power of moving away from seeing the world through the lens of transaction and towards embodying more purely the teachings of Jesus Christ defined by unconditional love.  

 With personal examples from his own journey, Steve and Val hone in on four concepts that have shaped Steve's own spiritual life and personal work:  gentle persuasion, meekness, long suffering and love unfeigned.  

This discussion exemplifies how one can commit to personal discipleship and practice these principles in their own realms--whether it be in personal relationships, professionally, or in formal spiritual settings.  

Val and Steve's hope in this series is to ignite further interest in first seeing more clearly where transaction exists, articulating how this way of relating is spiritually damning, and inviting each of us and our religious system into a higher, holier way of discipleship.  


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141: Gender, Sexuality, & Mormonism's Participation in Modern Politics24 Jul 202300:42:27

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Series Title: "Tabernacles of Clay” Analysis with Taylor Petrey [Part III of IV]

In this portion of their conversation exploring the history of gender and sexuality in the LDS church from post WWII until present, Valerie and Taylor Petrey do a deep dive into gender, sexuality and how the following historical developments, policies, and political engagement are each connected to the LDS Church’s attempts to keep in place heteronormativity due to the contagion theory of sexual orientation:

  • Church Correlation Movement
  • Family Home Evening Program
  • Home Teaching Program
  • Collaboration with the Religious Right
  • The Equal Rights Amendment
  • Prop 8
  • The Proclamation to the World on the Family
  • The 2015 Policy

In Friday's Final episode,  Val and Taylor wrap up this fascinating series responding to those out there who claim that “No doctrine has ever changed regarding gender and sexuality in the LDS church".  In short...nothing could be more false!

They will walk you through a lengthy list of all of the ideas forwarded by various official leaders throughout the years on pre-mortal gender, post-mortal gender, birth control, sexually acceptable behaviors amongst married cisgendered people, and so much more.

They also will walk you through a historical list of proposed causes and cures forwarded by the Church for homosexuality over the years.

They conclude Friday’s episode on a personal note, sharing how work in this area has deeply impacted them and why they both care so much about shining a light on this history.  Its all about healing our community and helping expand our ability to love.

Info on how to subscribe to listen to Friday’s episode is directly below.  See you there!


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🔒 140: Psychologists Versus LDS Authorities in Sexual Identity Issues21 Jul 202300:45:46

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Series Title: "Tabernacles of Clay” Analysis with Taylor Petrey [Part II of IV]

Join Valerie and colleague Taylor Petrey in this second episode of their series studying Taylor's must-read book Tabernacles of Clay, a study of the movements of the LDS church in the realm of gender and sexuality spanning the time period beginning post WWII to present.  

In this episode Val and Taylor address the following: 

  • How ideas about homosexuality evolved from a moral issue to a legal issue to a medical issue and then to a psychological issue.
  • How under the leadership of Spencer W. Kimball,  LDS church leaders adopted (for the first time) the role of pastoral counselor, offering advice and guidance for a variety of issues for which they had no formal psychological training.
  • How the LDS church’s stance on homosexuality and heterosexuality as "contagious" informed many of their various ideas about its cause and cures (many of which are listed in this episode).
  • How the church attempted to scientifically prove their stance rejecting the scientific community’s formal depathologization of homosexuality. And later admitted failure.

Thank you for supporting Val's countless hours devoted guests on the podcast like Taylor Petrey to enriching your spiritual journey!  She is deeply grateful for you!!!


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139: A History of the Evolving Definition of a Legitimate LDS Marriage17 Jul 202300:46:07

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Series Title: "Tabernacles of Clay” Analysis with Taylor Petrey [Part I of IV]

In this first episode in a fascinating four-part mini-series, Valerie and special guest Taylor Petrey break down the historical shifts in the theology of gender and sexuality in the LDS church beginning in the post-WWII era through the present as outlined in his excellent book Tabernacles of Clay (linked below).  Questions addressed in this episode [among others]:

  • How historical racial oppression relates to the larger picture of gender and sexual oppression
  • A paradox: If gender and sexuality is pre-mortal in nature, why it constantly seems to need human mediation, legislation, commandments
  • How the LDS church’s post-WWII stance on gender/sexuality is related to these same issues within larger Christian culture and are seen as a matter of national security
  • The connection between the church's post-WWII stance in strong support of the patriarchal order of marriage and their polygamy legacy

Friday's episode continues the conversation covering the following: 

  • Culturally and religiously evolving stances on homosexuality 
  • An exploration of the very fraught relationship between the psychological world and the Mormon ecclesiastical world in the treatment of psychological issues in general and sexual issues specifically
  • Significant developments in the administration of Spencer W. Kimball, the "self-help" movement and his book The Miracle of Forgiveness
  • An exploration of the proposed varying causes and cures for homosexuality throughout the years
  • And more! 


Info on how to subscribe to listen to Friday’s episode is directly below.  See you there!


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BONUS: How to subscribe to Friday Latter Day Struggles Episodes14 Jul 202300:17:41

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I see you!

You're missing your Friday morning fix with Valerie and the Latter Day Struggles Podcast!

Well, I gotcha covered :)

This quick bonus episode walks you through step by step HOW to subscribe to the Friday episodes of this podcast no matter what provider you use (you do NOT need to listen on Spotify but you DO need to subscribe THROUGH Spotify...just to answer a question asked many, many times!)

Here is the link on how to subscribe

This episode will walk you through what to do once you click this link!

If you want step by step WRITTEN and visual instructions with screen shots of each page in the subscription process, click here.

—————————————————————————————————————

SUBSCRIBE: All Friday episodes of Latter Day Struggles can be accessed through ⁠⁠⁠⁠a paid subscription ($9.99/month)⁠⁠. Thank you for supporting Valerie’s professional commitment to your LDS Faith expansion journey!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

     ⁠⁠⁠Click here to subscribe to all Friday Latter Day Struggles Episodes⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

——————————————————————————————————————

SUPPORT: Like what you’re hearing at Latter Day Struggles Podcast? You can support Valerie’s efforts by becoming a recurring donor on ⁠⁠Patreon.com!⁠⁠

——————————————————————————————————————

SUPPORT GROUPS: You are invited to join one of Valerie’s space-limited ⁠⁠⁠⁠Faith Crisis and Expansion Support and Processing Groups⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠!  As a trauma therapist, she continues to help our LDS faith expansion community become psychologically healthier and spiritually well in and around the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Details about availability on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠latterdaystruggles.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.  These groups ALWAYS FILL UP, so ju

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🔒 138. Potential Blind Spots Connected to the "One True Church" Bias14 Jul 202300:34:45

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Series Title: End of LDS Growth Analysis [Part VI of VI]

Welcome to the final episode of this 6-part Latter Day Struggles mini-series featuring an analysis of the recent journal article titled, “End of Growth?  Fading Prospects for Latter-day Saint Expansion” (article in full linked below).

In this final episode Nathan and Val talk about perhaps the most fascinating finding of this article, where the researchers merge administrative issues with theological issues.

This episode answers the following questions:

  • What is “Mormon Determinism”?
  • How has Mormon Determinism potentially stimulated complacency and impeded accountability, institutional insight, and process improvement?
  • What is “Authoritarian Positivism”?
  • How might Authoritative Positivism be connected to the tendency for organizational leadership to disregard sound principles, relevant data and the lived experience of others who share insights contrary to cherished and long standing beliefs?
  • How might any authority figure's claim that they are guided by the spirit of God be linked to confirmation bias and lead to one’s disinterest in other relevant data?

Thank you for supporting Val and Nathan’s countless hours devoted to enriching your spiritual journey by subscribing to Latter Day Struggles Friday Episodes!  They are deeply grateful for you!!!  Link to the article analyzed in this series:


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137: When 'Quick Conversion' Leads to Attrition Rather than Growth10 Jul 202300:41:10

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Series Title: End of LDS Growth Analysis [Part V of VI]

We’ve made it to episode #5 of this six part mini-series exploring LDS church growth struggles as studied in the recent journal article titled, “End of Growth?  Fading Prospects for Latter-day Saint Expansion” (article in full linked below)

In today’s episode, the focus of analysis is on the following three points:

  • The historical ‘gathering to Zion’ mentality has created isolationist culture to those gathered; has left many parts of the world with few members to grow the church; has therefore defaulted heavily on Utah-centric “world-view”, with secondary privileging of  US “worldview”; less so on the rest of the world
  • Occupational hazard of itinerant missionaries with low investment to quality conversion and hyper-focused on number of baptisms
  • The accelerated baptism program of the church which pressured all parties from mission presidents to missionaries to aggressively pressure lay people to quickly decide to be baptized with inadequate time to understand not only what they were learning about but also to acclimate to a new social network, belief system, an ideology

The next and final episode of this series tackles perhaps the most fascinating concept explored in this report: a proposal that the LDS church's stance as God's only "true church" is at the foundation of the various administrative struggles that have impeded the church's ability to grow.

Link to the article analyzed in this series:   https://jmssa.org/stewart

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🔒 136: Gerontocracy, Escalating Young Adult Attrition & LDS Growth Stagnation07 Jul 202300:32:39

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Series Title: End of LDS Growth Analysis [Part IV of VI]

Welcome to episode #4 of this six part mini-series where we are diving into all things LDS church growth struggles as studied in the recent journal article titled, “End of Growth?  Fading Prospects for Latter-day Saint Expansion” (article in full linked below)

In today’s episode, Nathan and Val work through three more reasons exploring why the LDS church has not grown into the "next Islam" as forecasted about 40 years ago.

This episode focuses on these three points:

  1. Retention issues amongst specific demographics, especially adolescents and generation Z. Youth and young adult disaffiliation is increasing and youth age at disaffiliation is getting younger.  
  2. Philosophical shifts in the missionary program including reduction in on-the-ground visibility between missionaries and the people in the communities where they serve; heavier focus on key indicators of success related to issues outside of the control of missionaries.
  3. The impact of the leadership being a gerontocracy and how this organizational philosophy may exact costs in growth.

Link to the article analyzed in this series:

Info on how to subscribe to listen to Friday’s episode is directly below.  See you there!


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135: Shrinking Missionary Force Means Shrinking LDS Church03 Jul 202300:42:06

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Series Title: End of LDS Growth Analysis [Part III of VI]

In the next three episodes of this six part series analyzing the article titled “End of Growth?  Fading Prospects for Latter-day Saint Expansion” (article in full linked below) Nathan and Val work through 10 reasons social scientists postulate the LDS church did not grow (as forecasted about 40 years old) into the “the next Islam”. 

This episode focuses on the following:

  • The church’s emphasis on “building from centers of strength.”  In the 1990’s the church rolled out a program redirecting missionary efforts and funds to parts of the world to "grow in leadership and capital before expanding to other parts of the world.”
  • Multiple trends unfolded that were not expected based on early predictions: LDS fertility rates dropped significantly.  Marriage rates dropped.  New converts worldwide were frequently empty nesters.  Many international converts had less children than their neighbors attending other churches.
  • A contracting LDS missionary force relative to early predictions.

Nathan and Val break down each of these topics and weigh in on how each each of these research findings represents (in their opinion) either an administrative situation, gradual and unable-to-predict-societal-evolution, or perhaps a subtle trending towards personal authority and spiritual autonomy that does not concurrently translate into LDS institutional nominal growth.

In the next episode Nathan and Val tackle topics 4-6 of the ten topics covered explaining lower than expected LDS church growth according to the journal article linked below. Stay tuned!


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134: Impressive LDS Church Growth in Africa, With some Caveats30 Jun 202300:29:36

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Series Title: End of LDS Growth Analysis [Part II of VI]

Join Nathan and Val this entire series analyzing the article titled “End of Growth?  Fading Prospects for Latter-day Saint Expansion” published recently in the Journal of Mormon Social Science Association (article in full linked below) where Nathan breaks down some incredibly fascinating data about the growth of several Christian churches in sub-Saharan Africa to offer some context and critique regarding the "massive growth" that some claim is happening in this part of the world in the LDS church.

Questions answered in this episode:

  • Are there a lot of LDS baptisms happening in sub-Saharan Africa compared to the rest of the world?
  • How does the nominal growth of the LDS church compare to other missionary-minded churches  in this same area?
  • What are some possible reasons why especially the Seventh Day Adventists and the Jehovah’s Witnesses are baptizing and retaining exponentially more people in this area of the world than the LDS church?
  • What might the LDS church’s tendency to bring the “American church” and it’s culture to Africa have to do with their relative struggles in membership growth and retention?
  • What might the LDS church learn from other thriving religions in this same demographic about allowing locals to infuse their beautiful customs and culture into a basic structure of a religious system?

Link to the article analyzed in this series:

Info on how to subscribe to listen to Friday’s episode is directly below.  See you there!


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133: LDS Growth Not Exponential as Predicted. Why?26 Jun 202300:31:02

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Series Title: End of LDS Growth Analysis [Part I of VI]

Val and Nathan are so excited to jump into a VERY FASCINATING six-part podcast mini-series analyzing a recently published journal article titled, “The End of Growth? Fading Prospects for Latter-day Saint Expansion”.

In the mid 80’s a team of social scientists predicted that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints was on track to become “The next Islam”, projecting that if the LDS church stayed on track with its current growth, it would achieve a membership between 36.4-121 million members by the year 2020.

At year end 2019 the LDS church reached a mere 16.5 million members, less than half of the number projected by these social scientists.

What Happened?

This is the topic of the next several episodes of the Latter Day Struggles Podcast.

In this specific episode, Nathan and Val offer an overview of six “misses” that the research team did not account for and then they break down each general area:  including (but not limited to) serious issues of member retention, a significant drop in child-of-record baptisms,  the shrinking size of the church’s missionary force, unexpected shrinking LDS fertility rates, and skewed membership record keeping practices.

IN FRIDAY’S EPISODE Nathan and Val tackle the topic of church growth specifically in Africa (the LDS church’s current missionary growth emphasis) and put the LDS church’s relative success in this geographic area in context by looking at the astronomical growth in Africa of two “cousin” church traditions—the Seventh Day Adventist’s and the Jehovah’s Witnesses.

Nathan and Val then discuss some valid reasons why these other faith traditions might be enjoying exponentially more growth in Africa and how the LDS church might benefit from learning from their religious counterparts, who seemed to have cracked some codes in multicultural membership growth and retention.

Link to the article analyzed in this series

Info on how to subscribe to listen to Friday’s episode is directly below.  See you there!


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245: Transaction as the "Pee Wee Level" of True Discipleship with Steve Young22 Jul 202400:57:30

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Series Title: Moving Beyond the Transactional Gospel [Part I of II]

Is it time to graduate from your "Pee Wee" (aka "beginner level" for all of you non-football players) level of discipleship?  If you're listening to this podcast, we are pretty sure the answer is a resounding YES!  Bring on the Pro-Level! 

In this enlightening episode of Latter Day Struggles, Valerie welcomes special guest Steve Young to delve into the transformative power of love within the context of faith expansion in and around the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. 

Together they explore ideas from Steve's book, "The Law of Love," highlighting the journey from transaction towards an upward leaning desire towards selfless love as the foundation of all belief and relationship.  

Together, they address the inevitable anxieties surrounding non-transactional relationships with God and challenge listeners to embrace a higher, more intimate relationship with the divine, moving away from prescriptive (transactional) guidelines towards personal, holistic engagement with self, faith, others, and ultimately with God. 

This episode offers a profound perspective on love's capacity to evoke authenticity and divine potential in ourselves and others.  

Friday's episode is a tender conversation between Steve and Val where they share how their own strivings to embody the Law of Love has changed them and enriched their relationships.   

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🔒 132: The Scary & the Sacred of LDS Reform Work23 Jun 202300:43:03

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Series Title: Valerie’s Personal Journey [Part II of II]

In this second episode of this mini-series,  Valerie responds to a variety of personal questions including (but not limited to):

  • How the podcast and accompanying work has impacted Val’s and Nathan’s parenting and family life.
  • Val’s and Nathan’s asymmetrical developmental time line that prepared them for this collaboration.
  • Their current relationship with local ecclesiastical leaders.
  • Her current reasons for continuing to attend her own LDS church congregation. 
  • Her feelings about those who choose to distance themselves from the church (temporarily or permanently) due her influence and her sincere encouragement for people to forge their own paths.
  • The most impactful books Val has read that evoked her own “faith crisis”, but which also led to her decision to create a platform to address these topics in a healthy, more open way.
  •  Thoughts and feelings about the potential of church discipline, personal surrender, belonging to ones’ self, and growing feelings of peace due to owning her journey and living in her integrity.

Books mentioned in this episode as most impactful for Valerie:

Info on how to subscribe to listen to Friday’s episode is directly below.  See you there!


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131: Choosing Love & Healing Over Silence & Fear19 Jun 202300:46:57

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Series Title: Valerie’s Personal Journey [Part I of II]

Join Val and fellow therapist Brannon Patrick this week as Brannon interviews Valerie about her first year accidentally diving into the deep end as a professional voice speaking respectfully but directly on behalf of thousands of individuals in the LDS faith and trust crisis and expansion space.

In those two episodes Valerie responds to a variety of personal questions including (but not limited to): 

  • Her own experiences finding herself a in a role speaking at the intersection of good psychology, a call for healthy theology, with a keen understanding of the dynamics of healthy and unhealthy organizations.
  • How she has navigated activity in the church.
  • Her and Brannon’s experience first deciding to work together and then his deciding to no longer work with her and their touching conclusions about this tough relational period.
  • Her experience with the very real possibility of burnout in this highly emotional work.
  • Her reasons for committing so much time and nurture to the support and processing group process and the unintended benefits of this experience for her as a facilitator
  • Her and Nathan’s journey as a couple, evolving parents, and working together on the podcast
  • Val’s thoughts on the possibility of church discipline due to her ministry

And much more! Latter Day Struggles Podcast Episodes mentioned in this episode as most impactful for Valerie:

Info on how to subscribe to listen to Friday’s episode is directly below.  See you there!


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🔒 BONUS!18 Jun 202300:08:19

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In this brief minisode, Val gets everyone (especially those not on social media) up to speed on the many directions that she is going to help you in your faith journey.

Here’s what I talk in more detail about on this bonus episode:

  1. There is a new Latter Day Struggles support and processing group starting July 17th 2023 and this is the last group beginning for the next several months.  If you’ve been on the fence, now is the time to jump in!  Go to latterdaystruggles.com and enroll there.
  2. Today 6/18/23 is the LAST DAY to benefit from GREAT discounts on Valerie’s Online Courses “A Couple’s Guide to Faith Crisis and Expansion”.  She is offering buy one get one free until midnight central standard time.  Much more info about this on Instagram at @latterdaystruggle.com in the highlights and current stories and on latterdaystruggles.com
  3. Not mentioned but worth mentioning :) is that Valerie will be participating in a variety of ways at this year’s Annual Sunstone Symposium.  Her presentation topics are “The Creation of the Deviant Out-group” and “LDS Faith Crisis 10 Years After the Faith Crisis Report”.  I will also be running a breakout group on working through faith crisis.  Please come to Sunstone and support this wonderful organization!  I’d love to meet you in person! 

——————————————————————————————————————

SUPPORT: Like what you’re hearing at Latter Day Struggles Podcast? You can support Valerie’s efforts by becoming a recurring donor on Patreon.com!

——————————————————————————————————————

SUPPORT GROUPS: You are invited to join one of Valerie’s space-limited ⁠⁠Faith Crisis and Expansion Support and Processing Groups⁠⁠⁠!  As a trauma therapist, she continues to help our LDS faith expansion community become psychologically healthier and spiritually well in and around the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Details about availability on ⁠⁠⁠latterdaystruggles.com⁠⁠⁠⁠.  These groups ALWAYS FILL UP, so jump in asap!

     Click here for a step-by-step guide on how to join a support group

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COURSES: Now available! “⁠⁠⁠A Couple’s Guide to Faith Crisis and Expansion⁠⁠⁠” parts I and II. See what else is offered on ⁠⁠latterdaystruggles.com⁠⁠⁠⁠

     Click her

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130: More Latter-day Saint stories of overcoming queerphobia16 Jun 202300:58:48

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Series Title: PRIDE and Personal Growth [Part II of II]

Join Val and a handful of special guests on this second half of a series honoring PRIDE month.  In this episode several beautiful women and men share their unique journeys finding self/other love and acceptance on the full spectrum of gender and sexuality.

Unlearning can be more challenging than learning, especially in a religious system that has focused so strongly on heteronormativity.  But these beautiful people show that is can indeed be done and that the journey is sacred and one worth celebrating and sharing. 

Please note: In the section featuring Kit and Bree and their beautiful love story, I want to make clear that the manner in which they have been able to navigate their marriage is a representation of what has felt congruent to each of them in their own personal story.

 I do not want to communicate that other outcomes in other marriages are not acceptable or reasonable.  I believe that giving each individual in each couple the liberty follow what is most congruent to them is the path to wholeness.  Books and podcasts recommended in this episode:


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129: How Someone Like You Can (or Maybe Did) Overcome Queerphobia12 Jun 202300:44:49

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Series Title: PRIDE and Personal Growth [Part I of II]

Join Valerie for the next couple of week honoring PRIDE in a variety of different ways.

First and most importantly, Valerie has invited several individuals (like yourselves!) from her small groups to share their own growth journeys in the context of PRIDE month.

In each of these stories shared you will learn from gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered, and straight ally individuals who learned profound lessons about love over fear, love over judgment, and love over unhealthy theology.

They share the beauty of being a work in progress and each model how it is okay to believe one way until we experience enough life to teach us to belief another way that is more aligned with God’s love for the diversity of their sacred creations.

Books and podcasts recommended in this episode:


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🔒 128: Supporting Your Struggling LDS Marriage09 Jun 202300:42:42

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Series Title: When Marriage Doctrines Unintentionally Divide a Couple [Part II of II]

In this episode Valerie reviews her overarching philosophical and psychological orientation for healthy marriage in general and how she helps couples heal from struggles typical to LDS faith crisis in particular.

She reviews key components to every section of her six self-guided online classes titled created to help the LDS couple struggling due to the faith journey of one of the partners.  

These classes can be taken as a couple or you can take them individually and integrate their concepts organically into your relationship if your partner is not yet ready to confront these complex issues.  

See link below to check this and other self-paced online classes to support you in your faith expansion journey! 


——————————————————————————————————————

CONSULTING: Interested in doing individ

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127: When it Feels Like Your Spouse Chooses the Church over Your Marriage05 Jun 202300:38:22

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Series Title: When Marriage Doctrines Unintentionally Divide a Couple [Part I of II]

This week on the Latter Day Struggles podcast Valerie focuses on a population of people whom she loves and sees consistently in a lot of pain here in and around the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.

Married couples in the LDS church tend to experience a great deal of distress when one partner begins a growth process that departs in any way from the standard beliefs and practices of the LDS faith. 

In this episode Valerie breaks down what she has coined “the successful failure” of LDS marriage theology, a belief system that is so incredibly successful garnering the faith and loyalty of some individuals that they would choose their religious beliefs about marriage over the marriage itself.

In short, the success of the LDS indoctrination about the specific demands of an LDS marriage may strongly contribute to the failure of the actual LDS marriage. 

This is tragic.

As a marriage therapist and a witness to too many LDS marriages coming undone unnecessarily,  Valerie has chosen to commit the past few months creating two profound online courses to help couples not become casualties to this “successful failure” phenomenon.

This episode describes the phenomenon in detail and the next episode in this mini-series describes Valerie’s overarching philosophical and psychological orientation to helping couples work through this challenge and become a stronger, more unconditionally loving couple than they ever imagined possible.

See directly below to grab the link to check out these self-paced online classes to support your marriage!  These classes can be taken as a couple or individually.  


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🔒 126: Fiona Givens' Tender & Inspiring Faith Journey02 Jun 202300:45:15

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Series Title: Visionary Women Past & Present [Part II of II]

In this beautiful and tender episode, Valerie has the privilege of interviewing LDS theologian Fiona Givens about her early life, diverse experiences, important relationships, and classical education that eventually led her into the LDS faith and deeply into the study of many facets of the nature of God.

This story is one of all of the typical ups and downs, seemingly insignificant events that lead to other more significant events, and finally a few moments where Valerie proposes to Fiona why her unique life distinctively prepared her for the work that she is doing now; something that is profoundly blessing thousands of faith-expanding Latter Day Saints in this era.  Perhaps Fiona is our own “Esther”, prepared for such a time as now.

Don’t miss this truly love-filled episode if you have found healing through the work of Fiona Givens.  It will endear you to her even more.

Books referenced in this episode:


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125: Feminine Visions of Julian of Norwich w/ Fiona Givens29 May 202301:18:56

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Series Title: Visionary Women Past & Present [Part I of II]

Join Valerie and guest Fiona Givens as together they discuss a true prophetess and mystic, Julian of Norwich.

Father Richard Rohr has often called Julian his "favorite mystic" and Fiona attributes this woman as one of the most personally influential to her in the development of her own whole and holy theology of the divine.  If these two recommendations aren't enough for you...then I don't know what to say!

A few highlights of this episode:

  • Julian's “showings” really shine a light on God’s inability to be angry with us for our humanness
  • Our current struggles with the nature of God in some brings up pain, anxiety, religious scrupulosity, and defection from the church
  • Our misunderstandings of the nature of God brings up generational trauma to the extent that we perpetuate a God concept that estranges us from Julian's God of infinite love
  • According to Julian's visions, sin is “no thing” in God’s eyes.  Our missteps are the education that endears us to God
  • As a committed Catholic, Julian too struggles with heavenly visions that did not align with the teachings of her “holy church” and she [as do we] does the work of differentiating her church’s imperfections with her personal revelations, choosing to align with the truth that was revealed to her directly from it’s source

Book referenced in this episode:


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124: Five Components of Mature Spirituality26 May 202300:43:15

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If you loved the last episode of Latter Day Struggles, you’ll love Valerie and Nathan’s discussion about the 5 components that can help each of us know that we have embraced a mature spirituality:  A MATURE SPIRITUALITY: 

  • Resonates from within (is not compelled from beyond)
  • Invites the numinous (beckons, compels us forward, drives us to know more with a magnetic-like pull)
  • Opens us to mystery (welcomes the unknown; is open to a different way of seeing, worshipping, experiencing, that is unconnected to our programming)
  • Asks us to grow up (does not hand off the soul stretching discerning process of life to authorities, experts, or any other "big person", thus preventing us from the inevitable anxiety of growth)
  • Invites us to live a value driven relational life (the culmination of all of the above points shows up "on the ground" as responsible, accountable, respectful of other's journeys, and loving of the process of life as a sacred growth experience)

**Each of Valerie’s Support and Processing Groups and Online Courses is Grounded in these Five Principles and offers a structure for achieving a mature relationship with spirituality. 

Book referenced in this episode: 


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🔒 244: When Loyalty is used to Undermine Love19 Jul 202400:41:18

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Series Title: A Study of Loyalty [Part II of II]

In this advanced content exclusive part two of this series, Valerie and Nathan continue to analyze the complexities of loyalty and how and when it can clash with personal integrity. 

Together, they explore the potential conflicts arising when loyalty is prioritized over love within church institutions, and particularly how this near enemy attribute can be encouraged when discussing sensitive issues related to the LGBTQ community, a struggle owning complex historical issues, and other topics that would require openness, transparency, and full accountability for our system to meet its true potential as a place of spiritual health and healing. 

As always, their conversation emphasizes the necessity of open dialogue, respect,  and love-based virtues to foster a truly healthy spiritual community within the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  

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123: A Study of Immature Versus Maturing Spirituality22 May 202300:33:04

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During the Covid Pandemic, Valerie read even more than usual.  One of the authors whom she binged was Jungian analyst James Hollis, who tipped her entire psychological and theological paradigm…right-side-up…finally. 

She passed several books off to Nathan and together they reconfigured a spirituality that is the foundation of what you hear in some way, shape, or form in each episode of Latter Day Struggles. 

In this episode they discuss the colossal difference between LESS MATURE and MATURE spirituality.

Highlights:

  1. Immature spirituality hands beliefs and life choices off to authority figures.  Mature spirituality takes personal ownership in one’s own beliefs and life choices
  2. Immature spiritual builds walls.  Mature spirituality breaks down walls
  3. Immature spirituality “pins down” truth and mandates proper worship, observance, and belief.  Mature spirituality knows that once the mystery of God and other mystical experience has been given a name, a form, a face, and a structure—its essence, beauty, and mystery often recedes, ceasing to connect us to the divine.

Book referenced in this episode: 


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122: On the LDS Faith Expansion Journey & the Painful Loss of Community19 May 202300:37:17

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Author, Evangelical theologian, and recently deceased Christian reformer Rachel Held Evans poignantly stated, 

"A lot of people think the hardest part about religious doubt is feeling isolated from God. It's not. At least in my experience, the hardest part about doubt is feeling isolated from your community."

In this episode Valerie and Nathan share their thoughts and personal experiences about how faith expansion can be both a deeply sacred experience of personal enlightenment but also profoundly isolating, lonely, and relationally painful as we try to relate to our former circles of family and friends. Why is this so hard? Val and Nathan offer some ideas:

Our Former Inner Circle LDS tribe (both friends and family):

  1. Sometimes build their relational lives around the church, which makes relating to those different from themselves challenging; especially in relationships where both parties were accustomed to relating to one another only through church-related common beliefs
  2. Sometimes seem to struggle being genuinely interested, curious, and open to the experiences of their friends and loved ones now differing from themselves and relate to us from a place of "concern, heal, reconvert, or fix"
  3. Are conditioned by teachings at church that those of us in faith expansion are "falling away" or "led by Satan" in our experiences, thereby making it challenging to want to explain, justify, self defend (as we have heard this rhetoric ourselves all of our lives)
  4. Judge those of us no longer fully aligned with them. This judgment might be cloaked in 'concern', but its essence (possibly unconscious but still felt by us) is "without the church you are lost.  As a faithful  church member, my testimony insulates me in certainly, thereby also preventing me from curiosity, openness, and a true desire to learn from you."

These divides create an added layer of grief on top of the grieve of faith and trust crisis. These divides prevent us from drawing upon our core family and friends when we’re need them most.

This episode was is offered with the hope to help you feel seen, understood, and not alone as we struggle relationally in our faith expansion.

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121: On the LDS Faith Expansion Journey & Cynicism Spirals15 May 202300:50:05

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Join Val as she breaks down a thought provoking idea about the pull of cynicism as a natural emotional component of Christian faith evolution. 

She explores a beautiful and thought provoking quote by the late Rachel Held Evans from her book Searching for Sundays. Highlights of this episode:

  • Cynicism is a protective emotion often experienced to manage legitimate emotions such as betrayed trust, grief, anger, and disorientation. 
  • Grief and disorientation in LDS (and other Christian) faith crisis/expansion experiences are often directly correlated to one’s former “all in” status and [over] commitment to the promises made by the institution
  • Recovering from cynicism and moving into a psychological space of faith expansion and spiritual peace cannot be forced
  • Psychological and spiritual growth embodies an eventual paradigm shift in relationship to the institution, complete with a realization that no institution could (nor should) do for us what it claimed it could (and should) do to bring us truly into contact with our most whole selves and our creators.

As we grieve the former paradigm (and any harm done by it) and embrace our life’s experiences as platforms for deepening discernment, wrestle, and the opportunity to seize personal authority for ourselves, we can see these institutions as paradoxically instrumental in our processes of truly growing up and deciding what to accept, reject, and reconcile for ourselves.

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