Our culture is confused about what it means to be a man, leaving men ill-equipped to navigate life's ups and downs. At Grace Church, we've worked hard to provide a framework for biblical masculinity that makes a difference in their everyday lives. Through the Men at Grace podcast, the goal of every episode is to help motivate and encourage men to take responsibility for the people and the situations God brings into their lives.
Learn more at https://gracechurchsc.org/mrt
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Life is filled with difficulties. If you’ve been living on this earth long enough and you’re a man then you know that challenges are everywhere. As men we experience difficulty in our jobs, our relationships, our finances, and the list goes on and on. But God who is rich in love and mercy has given us a framework for dealing with the challenges that life brings.
We believe that men are responsible for the people and the situations that God brings into our lives. And that by moving towards people and situations and depending on God… we win in all areas
The men at grace podcast is a resource for you who desire to pursue Authentic Manhood. In each episode
you'll hear from men who have faced challenges in their work, struggles in their marriage, trouble navigating midlife, questions about authority, and other relatable life issues.
Listeners will hear how God’s Word and the church shaped the decision-making of each of these men and allowed them to live victoriously as Christ intended.
I invite you to listen, subscribe, and share these episodes and episode resources with other men so that you can dialogue around what it looks like to be an authentic man.
25: Adopting a Coaching Mindset in Parenting with Kelly Hunt
Season 2 · Episode 25
Monday, December 12, 2022 • Duration 33:27
In this episode, Chris Rivers speaks with Kelly Hunt about the changing roles of parenthood and how to effectively engage teenagers and young adults. Using the analogy of a coach, Kelly encourages listeners to guide their adult children from the “sidelines” while allowing them to feel the weight of responsibility and build confidence.
APPLICATION:
Read Luke 15:11-24. Looking at this passage from the perspective of the father, what is one thing you notice or can apply to your role as a parent?
Are you currently operating as an authoritative parent or functioning more as a coach? Based on the stage of life your child is currently in, what shifts might you need to make?
Think about a coach who has been influential in your life. What parallels can you make between their role and the role you have as a parent?
How are you serving as an anchor in your children’s lives? What is one action step you can take to move towards your children and be available to them?
If you know a man who would benefit from hearing this episode, share it with him. Having intentional conversations around these principles is a great way to disciple and help others move towards Christ.
16: How Should Men Think When It Comes to Leading Their Families? with Doug Peterson
Season 2 · Episode 2
Thursday, March 3, 2022 • Duration 28:58
In this episode, Chris Rivers, Brad Walbridge, and Doug Peterson tackle the question, “how should men think when it comes to leading their families?” Using a boating analogy, they look at three points to consider when trying to bring purpose and intentionality to a man’s role of leader in the home. Share, listen, and then discuss the application, key ideas, and Scripture references in a one-on-one conversation or with a group of men. Check out this episode's Study Questions by visiting:https://resources.gracechurchsc.org/podcasts/men-at-grace
Doug shared the concept of a boat as a representation of a family. Just like learning to operate a boat on the sea, families must learn how to work together, figure out problems they encounter, and teach their children how to “navigate” life. While all of the boats are different, they are all on a similar journey. Doug shares three points and expounds on how each of these can help men think intentionally when leading their families.
If you know a man who would benefit from hearing this episode, share it with him. Having intentional conversations around these principles is a great way to disciple and help others move towards Christ.
15: What Kind of Man Do I Want to Be? with Micah Williams and Brandon Dejong
Season 2 · Episode 1
Thursday, February 3, 2022 • Duration 38:48
In the 15th episode of the Men at Grace podcast, Chris Rivers, Micah Williams, and Brandon Dejong, members of Grace Church’s Pelham campus, tackle the question, “what kind of man do I want to be?” or, more specifically, “what kind of man does God want me to be?” They discuss the core identity of an authentic man and explore practical strategies for building intentionality and natural rhythms around this idea. Share, listen and then discuss the application, key ideas, and Scripture references in a one-on-one conversation or with a group of men.
In considering the question, “what type of man do I want to be?” Micah and Brandon shared their initial thoughts. Micah, a self-described “floater,” noted the absence of intentionality in certain areas of his life. He realized how his tendency to take life as it comes, without a clear strategy, was not setting him up to become the man he wanted to be. Brandon began thinking about what it might look like to be different and set apart to the people around him. He asked himself how this might play out in his connections with his friends, his interactions at work, and his relationship with his wife.
The question “what type of man do I want to be?” leads us to reflect on two ideas: identity and strategy. Chris unpacked the concept of identity as it relates to authentic manhood. As men, we were created and have a Creator. We have a God-given calling to be“responsible for.” This means we move towards the people and situations God places in our lives and depend onGod our Creator. In doing so, we are spurred on to good works and begin focusing on ways to accept responsibility and steward our identity in Christ.
When we understand our identity, we logically move to the concept of strategy. This answers the question, “how do I move?” In most cases, lack of strategy is the primary reason for our ineffectiveness as authentic men. Chris presented a practical framework using “lanes'' to address different areas of our lives. He encouraged listeners to take some time to evaluate these categories, develop strategies, and evaluate progress. Micah and Brandon explored these concepts in further detail during the episode.
14: Hiding in Plain Sight with Taylor Hall
Season 1 · Episode 14
Monday, January 3, 2022 • Duration 42:39
In this episode, Chris Rivers, Taylor Hall, and Scott Beardsley discuss the desire to hide and manage sin to avoid being fully known and the freedom that comes when we expose our brokenness. Share, listen and then discuss the application, key ideas, and scripture references in a one on one conversation or with a group of men.
Taylor took a job at Grace as a worship and video director after finishing college. Admittedly, he was not in a good place and was experiencing a season of misplaced identity. His church experiences leading up to that point, and the rigid rules-based paradigm he was exposed to, had left him jaded and confused. He grew up trying to hide his sin and the questions he had for fear of being judged or shamed. Taylor was becoming weary of trying to “manage” his sin and maintain a facade of control.
The church context at Grace was different from Taylor’s previous experiences. He was immediately met with love, acceptance, and a genuine desire from others to know him. He was surprised by the level of vulnerability and honesty among the people he met. Taylor was initially turned off by this display. He had become so used to hiding and manipulating his circumstances to create the image he wanted others to see, letting people in was difficult.
As God began working in Taylor’s life, he was able to recognize the walls he had built and how they were impeding his personal and spiritual growth. He slowly began to release control and open himself up to the people around him. With this new level of vulnerability, Taylor was able to accept corrective criticism from others. He was able to expose his weaknesses and find freedom from hiding. He joined a re:gen group where he came face to face with his sin and learned the value of trusting God over having control.
Taylor’s transformation gave him a desire to help others. He wanted to have intentional conversations. He recognized how honesty, community, and sharing with others was becoming more natural for him. He began to pray for opportunities to connect with and pour into the lives of those around him. God opened the door for Taylor to serve as a student re:gen leader. This experience allowed him to share some of his previous struggles and model honesty and vulnerability for the young men in his group. He learned the art of asking good questions and helping students identify the core issues that may be hindering growth in their lives.
13: Stewarding Masculine Energy with Paul Gaeto
Season 1 · Episode 13
Thursday, December 2, 2021 • Duration 36:36
In the 13th episode of the Men at Grace podcast, Chris Rivers, Scott Mozingo, and Paul Gaeto, a member of Grace Church’s Downtown campus, discuss the stewardship of masculine energy in retirement and explore ways to incorporate serving and discipleship opportunities in this unique season of life.
Paul and his wife entered retirement in their fifties and moved to the Greenville area. They quickly became involved at Grace and began thinking about how they wanted to spend their retirement years. Paul noticed how the lives of many of his Christian role models seemed to take a downward turn when they entered retirement. They often became self-indulgent, angry, bitter, and anxious. Paul knew he wanted to take a different approach. He began to ask himself the question, “How do I structure my retirement to disciple people?”
With this question in mind, Paul created a personal mission statement: Please God, serve others. Taken from the principles outlined in Matthew 22:37-39, this life motto helped Paul steward his energy towards pleasing God and serving others. The concept of stewardship--active and responsible management of God’s creation for God’s purposes-- served as a guide in Paul’s life. He identified three different ways in which men steward this energy:
Deploying it positively- seeking to honor God, actively using the gifts He has given
Squandering - a form of passivity, seeking comfort, no real plan or direction
Deploying it negatively - defaulting to anger, anxiety, bitterness, self-soothing, sexual sin, or anything that distracts from pleasing God and serving others
Paul’s desire to steward his time and energy wisely, and his involvement in a discipleship focused church, opened the door for him to serve in a number of ministries. From acting as a guardian ad litem and mentor to foster children to serving in the Jump Start prison ministry, as well as his involvement in the college mentoring program, Paul stepped outside his comfort zone and interacted with people in the margins who need to see the love of Christ.
12: Fighting the Battleground of Pride with Alex Borges
Season 1 · Episode 12
Thursday, November 4, 2021 • Duration 24:00
In the 12th episode of the Men at Grace podcast, Chris Rivers, Ben Temple, and Alex Borges, a member of Grace Church’s Downtown campus, discuss how pride and a desire to control our circumstances often prevent us from moving and experiencing the fullness God has for our lives. Share, listen, and then discuss the application, key ideas, and Scripture references in a one-on-one conversation or with a group of men.
Has God ever led you to serve in a role where the details were ambiguous or unclear? Was this difficult for you? Why or why not?
What did this experience teach you about yourself? Teach you about God? What idols did it reveal in your life? What unexpected blessings did you receive from this experience?
If you have not served in a role that stretched you in some way or made you aware of your need for God, what is preventing you from taking that next step?
Alex mentioned two challenging questions: What am I spending my time on? Who actually depends on me? How would you answer these questions? Are you passive towards those in need around you? In what ways are you pouring yourself out for others?
SCRIPTURE REFERENCES
Anyone who wants to serve me must follow me, because my servants must be where I am. And the Father will honor anyone who serves me. John 12:26
For you have been called to live in freedom, my brothers and sisters. But don’t use your freedom to satisfy your sinful nature. Instead, use your freedom to serve one another in love. Genesis 5:13
In this episode, Chris Rivers, Scott Aman, and Chad Clint discuss “Just Serve Day,” an outreach ministry event at Grace Church. Scott shares his involvement in this event and how it has impacted his life in a personal way. Scott and Chad also explore the benefits of serving, in any capacity, and talk about how it can build credibility with others and open the door for gospel conversations. Share, listen and then discuss the application, key ideas, and scripture references in a one on one conversation or with a group of men.
Have you participated in “Just Serve Day” at Grace Church or another service-focused event? In what ways did your participation shape you or challenge you in some way?
How has God opened doors for you to have gospel conversations while you were serving others?
Where do you think you would fall on the “Me and Others” continuum Scott described? What obstacles prevent you from pouring yourself out for others?
What benefits have you gained from serving others? What do you think are some of the challenges to serving?
KEY POINTS
“Just Serve Day” is an outreach ministry event at Grace Church. It is an opportunity for the church to band together to serve the community and strengthen local partners. Teams from each campus take part in service projects ranging from picking up trash to lawn maintenance/beautification to other facility maintenance projects. This event is not a “one and done” serving day. The goal is to create a culture of service, develop credibility in the community, and ultimately lead to gospel conversations with the people served.
Scott participated in “Just Serve Day” by volunteering at The Renewal Center, an addiction treatment center for women. He admits to being hesitant, at first, but recognized this as an opportunity to use his gifts and take action. Scott watched God work through this experience and was able to see how serving opened the door to build relationships and tell people about Jesus.
09: Dying to Yourself with Geoff Van De Merwe
Season 1 · Episode 9
Thursday, August 5, 2021 • Duration 24:15
In this episode, Chris Rives, Jeremy Meyer and Geoff Van De Merwe discuss Geoff’s participation in the re|engage program at Grace church and the life change that took place in his marriage, family, and walk with the Lord. Share, listen and then discuss the Episode 9 Study Questions (https://resources.gracechurchsc.org/podcasts/men-at-grace) in a one on one conversation or with a group of men.
APPLICATION
What are some ways you have seen God work in your life through participation in re|engage, Re:Gen, a Men’s Roundtable study, or another ministry area of the church? What is one thing you learned about yourself through this process? What did you learn about God?
When did you first realize your need for God? What changes took place in your life after you made this decision?
What evidence do you see in your life of how God is changing you and stretching you?
How can you be “deliberate in your steps?” What would this look like on a practical level?
SCRIPTURE
For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. Matthew 12:34 (ESV)
We take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 2 Corinthians 10:5 (NIV)
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Learn more about the re|engage ministry at Grace Church by visiting: gracechurchsc.org/connect/pastoral-care/re-engage
Have questions? Email us at: menofgrace@gracechurchsc.org
08: Managing Tension with James Farnham
Season 1 · Episode 8
Thursday, July 8, 2021 • Duration 27:47
In this episode, Chris Rives and James Farnham discuss the role of tension in moving towards responsibility. Share, listen and then discuss the application, key ideas, and scripture references in a one on one conversation or with a group of men. If you know a man that would benefit from hearing this episode, share it with him. Having intentional conversations around these principles is a great way to disciple and help others move towards Christ.
Where have you seen God use tension to get your attention? How have these situations drawn you closer to God and the person He created you to be?
Where have you seen examples of humility and dependence demonstrated in the last two weeks?
Are you someone who takes on more than they should? If so, how can you differentiate between areas of concern and areas of responsibility in your life?
How do you handle tension with others? How do you handle tension when leading others? What is the role of tension in Biblical community?
KEY POINTS
There is a purpose for tension in our lives. The moments, seasons, circumstances and people God places in our lives have the potential to draw us closer to who God is and who God created us to be. God uses tension to get our attention.
James’ experience in Men’s Roundtable and specifically, Authentic Manhood, gave him a language to think about and process the situations in his life. He began to ask the question, “As an authentic man, how am I supposed to respond?” James took hold of the definition of an authentic man - being responsible for the people and situations God brings into your life. For him, this meant a calling to lean in and move in a position of humility and dependence.
While we are called to take responsibility as men, we cannot insert ourselves in every situation. We have to pray, be humble, and ask God to show us the situations in which He wants us to respond.
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Brad summarized three important takeaways: 1.) My desires and motivations need to align with God through process and action steps. 2.) Being on mission requires me to bring others along so they can see God moving. 3.) Community involves intentionally and repetition.
SCRIPTURE REFERENCES
Ephesians 2:10, Matthew 22:36-40, Matthew 28:16-20
Join a men’s roundtable study by finding a campus near you and register for AuthenticManhood by visiting:gracechurchsc.org/mrt
If you know a man that would benefit from hearing this episode, share it with him. Having intentional conversations around these principles is a great way to disciple and help others move towards Christ.
Thanks to Scott Beardsley and Lauren Bryant for their help in producing this episode.
Bridges for a Brighter Tomorrow
While it is important to find opportunities to serve and steward energy wisely, activity by itself is not the goal. Activity should always lead to greater devotion. Paul saw this principle firsthand through his experiences. The more he humbled himself and stepped outside of his comfort zone, the closer he felt to God and more he was able to see God at work in his life.
SCRIPTURE REFERENCES
Jesus replied, “You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ Matthew 22:37-39
RESOURCES
Money Matters is a class that helps participants renew their mindset concerning personal finance, become good and faithful stewards of the resources God has given them, and bring God glory through their money as well as their lives. https://gracechurchsc.org/moneymatters
If you know a man that would benefit from hearing this episode, share it with him. Having intentional conversations around these principles is a great way to disciple and help others move towards Christ.
Join a Men’s Roundtable study by finding a campus near you and register for Authentic Manhood at: gracechurchsc.org/mrt
If you know a man who would benefit from hearing this episode, share it with him. Having intentional conversations around these principles is a great way to disciple and help others move towards Christ.
Scott shared a visual image of what he called “The Me and Others Continuum.” On one end of the continuum is our own self-centered thinking and desire to please self. On the other end is meeting the needs of others and striving to live like Jesus. Through his experiences, Scott began to see himself moving towards the “others” end of the continuum and starting to grasp the meaning of being “poured out.”
Scott’s participation in “Just Serve Day” was beneficial in many ways. First, it helped to build camaraderie and fellowship. As men and women worked together to accomplish a goal, they grew closer through this shared experience. Next, it allowed participants to show their love and concern for others while being compelling to the community they served. Finally, it pushed Scott and those who served alongside him to avoid passivity and move to action.
RELATED SCRIPTURES:
- Romans 12:1, 2 Timothy 4:6-7
- Join a men’s roundtable study by finding a campus near you and register. This teaching can be found by visiting: gracechurchsc.org/mrt
Many thanks to Lauren Bryant and Scott Beardsley for helping to produce this episode.
As a community group leader, there are multiple sources of tension. One area of tension occurs with starting a group, handling administrative duties, and planning logistics. Another source of tension involves the role of leading other people. Although this can be uncomfortable, it is the responsibility of the leaders to apply tension, when necessary, with the goal of helping members take responsibility and move towards what God would have them do. We must remember we are not alone as leaders. There are people available to give us guidance and help us determine when and how to respond.
RESOURCES
Men’s Roundtable: This teaching can be found by visiting:gracechurchsc.org/mrt
