You learned about dorsal vagal shutdown—that numbness and disconnection physicians feel. Now here's the hope: There are ways to climb back up the ladder.

Sometimes you're so far outside your zone of resilience, you can't outthink it. You have to do something with your body.

SSRIs/SNRIs can help stabilize mood and increase arousal when you're too depleted to self-regulate.

No shame. We work in extreme stress. Therapy and medication are tools, not failures.

Simple ways to enhance vagal tone:

• Deep breathing (focus on the EXHALE)
• Humming or singing (yes, car karaoke counts!)
• Gargling
• Cold water on face

These aren't woo-woo—they're biological recalibrations.

Somatic therapy uses your body during sessions to release stored stress through body awareness and gentle movement.

Real talk: "I go to therapy. I love my therapist. It makes my life so much better. We need to normalize this."

Why it matters: We're treated like we should be superhuman, taking on trauma with no sleep or self-care. That's a recipe for hitting the wall.

Why yoga works: Gets you back into your body where you can reconnect. It's calming in a ventral vagal way (not dorsal shutdown).

Too exhausted to exercise? Try ONE yoga pose for 30 seconds. Just break the frozen state.

Different breathing techniques:

• Some are activating
• Some are relaxing
• Work with experienced practitioners

HeartMath device: Like a pulse ox that shows your heart rate variability as you do exercises

Neurofeedback: EEG probes detect when you're revved up—TV goes black until you calm yourself down

Perfect for control enthusiasts: Learn to control your own physiologic responses

• Healthy food
• SLEEP (we discount this too much—it's crucial)
• Exercise
• Meditation (even 1-2 minutes creates massive positive change)

Ever been around someone you just feel safe with? That person who makes you laugh and calm down instantly?

That's co-regulation. Seek those people out.

Also works:

• Physical touch, hugs, snuggles
• Pet snuggles (even 175-pound lap dogs!)
• Call a safe friend

Singing increases ventral vagus tone (car singers, rejoice!)

Create your comedy arsenal:

• Meme files
• List of funny movies
• Favorite Instagram topics
• Pet videos with voiceovers
• Healthcare worker parody accounts
• Daily Dose of Internet
• Kids saying sassy things

Reminder: Life is worth living. You won't be stuck in dorsal vagal forever.

"This is my dorsal reset. My biological recalibration. Not me failing."

Focus on the EXHALE—that's when parasympathetics turn on

Try the 5-minute body scan:

• Lie down, close eyes
• Start at scalp, work to toes
• Relax each body part on exhale
• (You might fall asleep—that's okay!)

Text someone you care about. Check in on someone who needed help.

Gets you out of rumination and back into meaning

Speak to yourself with compassion (the strongest antidote to burnout)

• Neurogenic tremor
• Dancing, stomping
• Jump up and down
• Shake it out

Each micro step signals safety to your nervous system.

"This is an era, not who I am."

Sometimes it feels like "maybe this is just who I am now."

NO. Your true self is still in there waiting.

This is a physiologic reaction to things that have been happening to you. Your ventral vagal state—your executive brain—wants to get back online. It wants to reconnect with your empathy, humor, and creativity.

Burnout tricks you into thinking that version of you is gone. That's a lie.

Your nervous system is doing its best. It's meant for survival. With small signals of safety—grounding, breathing, humming—you can return to connection, vitality, and purpose.

Your nervous system is here for you. We're here for you.

Dr. Kristin Neff's Center for Mindful Self-Compassion - Research-backed approach to self-compassion

Podcast Fast Track - Nearly 200 episodes can be overwhelming. We've handpicked the most high-yield episodes to jumpstart your journey.

Get it: www.thewholephysician.com/fasttrack

That feeling of burnout numbness isn't your fault. It's not who you are. And it isn't permanent.

Share your recalibration tricks: podcast@thewholephysician.com

You can find yourself again. Let's climb together.

Our new Podcast Fast Track Book a Session  or Physician Wellness Triage (same link) Sign up for the Weekly Well Check

"I feel totally numb. I don't care anymore, and I hate that I don't care."

"Even when I sleep, I wake up tired."

"I used to be so empathetic. Now I just want everyone to leave me alone."

What you're experiencing isn't just burnout—it's dorsal vagal shutdown.

1. Ventral Vagal (Safe Zone) ✨ Calm, connected, creative, social - where we want to be

2. Sympathetic (Fight or Flight) ⚡ Heart racing, hyperalert, frantic productivity mode

3. Dorsal Vagal (Shutdown/Freeze) 🥶 Emotional flatness, complete disconnection, life behind glass Your body playing dead like a possum

Sympathetic overdrive (constant productivity) → Dorsal collapse (complete numbness)

You're cycling between: Fixing everything frantically → Can't even get out of your car at home

The Vagus Nerve has two branches:

• Ventral (newer): Social connection and safety
• Dorsal (older): Shutdown when overwhelmed

Dorsal shutdown creates:

• Slow heart rate, reduced oxygen
• Flattened affect
• Inability to think critically
• Moving through life underwater

This isn't weakness. This is evolution.

Your nervous system developed this over millennia. When fight/flight fails, your body chooses shutdown to conserve energy and protect you.

We live in near-constant sympathetic overdrive:

• Override hunger, fatigue, basic needs
• Constantly fixing, moving, answering calls
• Always "on" for everyone

Eventually, the system flips to shutdown.

• Staring blankly at charts, unable to type
• Driving home in complete silence
• Can't connect with your kids even though you want to
• Loss of empathy for patients (and hating it)
• Collapsing on couch, holding remote, not moving

Just having words for this changes everything.

"I'm experiencing dorsal vagal shutdown." "I'm in my dorsal vagal era." "This is a nervous system state—not who I am."

Naming it is a technique for getting out of it.

Taylor Swift has fascinating eras. You have your dorsal vagal era. Nearly every burned-out physician experiences this.

The empowering news: This isn't permanent. Nervous system states change. You can climb back up the ladder.

When your partner says you're "being emotional":

"Actually, I'm experiencing dorsal vagal shutdown due to prolonged sympathetic overdrive."

Boom. Science.

How to climb out of shutdown with medical tools, therapy approaches, and daily practices.

You're not broken. Your nervous system is doing exactly what it evolved to do.

Share your stories: podcast@thewholephysician.com

Your nervous system can heal. Let's climb together.

What if your worth had nothing to do with your productivity, your pager, or your sacrifice?

In the final episode of our Codependence series, we’re diving deep into one of the most freeing truths you can learn as a physician (or frankly, as a human): you are more than your usefulness.

Many of us in medicine — especially women and those raised in high-demand families — have been praised for being martyrs. We’ve built entire identities around being the helper, the achiever, the rock. But at what cost? In this conversation, we explore:

✨ The Hidden Trap of the “Martyr” Identity – Why over-functioning feels rewarding… until it doesn’t.
✨ How Codependence Distorts Your Sense of Self – And how to reclaim the YOU beneath the role.
✨ Differentiation: The Key to Freedom – Staying emotionally connected without losing yourself.
✨ Practical Steps to Rebuild Your Identity – From inner child work and journaling to creative expression and supportive relationships.
✨ The Worthiness Reframe You Need to Hear – You are not here to be everything to everyone. You are here to be fully yourself.

This episode is packed with truth bombs, gentle challenges, and actionable tools to help you shift from people-pleasing and self-sacrifice into authenticity, agency, and healing — for yourself and the people you serve.

💡 Whether you’re realizing for the first time that your identity has been tangled up in your role, or you’ve been working on this for years, you’ll leave this episode with hope, clarity, and permission to step into a life that feels like yours again.

📅 Bonus Announcement – If you’re coming to the ASEP Scientific Assembly 2025 in Salt Lake City, join us for our Happy ER Hour — a physician meetup for community, connection, and maybe a few laughs.

Because you’re not falling apart. You’re falling into alignment. And we love that for you. 💛

**Podcast Show Notes: "Gratitude and Joy"**

- Hosts: Amanda Dinsmore, Laura, Kendra Morrison
- Introduction (00:01-01:33)
- Amanda welcomes listeners back to the podcast, introduces herself, Laura, and Kendra.
- Mention of receiving a one-star podcast review and the hosts' humorous reaction to it.
- A shoutout to a listener named Renee who gave a five-star review and their appreciation for her.

- Discussion on Gratitude and Joy (01:33-11:09)
- Introduction to the topic of gratitude and joy, especially relevant as the episode is released on Thanksgiving.
- Gratitude's role in experiencing joy, vulnerability, and spiritual practices.
- Mention of Brene Brown's book "The Gifts of Imperfection" and how it explores the connection between gratitude and joy.
- The three patterns of people regarding joy, gratitude, and a joyful life.
- The impact of fear and scarcity on experiencing joy and gratitude.
- Differentiating between happiness and joy as emotions and experiences.
- Kendra's personal gratitude practice and how it helps her stay present in joyful moments.
- Kendra's story about going hunting with her son and finding joy and gratitude in the experience.

- Sonya Lyubomirsky's Research (11:09-19:11)
- Discussion of research by Sonya Lyubomirsky, a psychology professor at UC Riverside.
- Gratitude as a meta-strategy for achieving happiness.
- Lyubomirsky's definition of gratitude, including wonder, appreciation, counting blessings, and savoring.
- Gratitude as an antidote to negative emotions, envy, and avarice.
- Research findings on the effects of gratitude practice on physical and emotional well-being.
- The practice of gratitude and its impact on optimism and satisfaction in life.

- Gratitude Practices (19:11-26:53)
- Amanda shares various gratitude practices, including writing down what you're grateful for, replacing ungrateful thoughts, and expressing gratitude directly to others.
- The concept of a "gratitude visit," where you write a letter thanking someone for their role in your success and read it to them.
- Personal anecdotes about expressing gratitude in emails and phone calls in a professional setting.
- The power of starting conversations with gratitude to foster better interactions.

- Mental Filtering and Changing Perspectives (26:53-31:19)
- Discussion of cognitive distortions, specifically mental filtering, and how it relates to gratitude practice.
- Gratitude as a way to intentionally shift one's focus from negativity to positivity.
- Acknowledging the benefits of moving from a left-brained, analytical mindset to a right-brained, creative mindset.

- Conclusion and Invitation (31:19-32:11)
- The hosts express their hope to inspire listeners to practice gratitude during the holiday season and beyond.
- Announcement of an upcoming free class on "Overcoming Over Whatevering" December 27 at noon CST.
- Closing remarks emphasizing the value of physicians and their work.

**Note:** Timestamps are approximate and based on the content of the transcript provided.

The Gifts of Imperfection

The How of Happiness

Hidden Figures trailer

Nate Bargatze on "Is it a good sign when eagles land on your head?"

Kendra's Surprise Interview!

- **Introduction:**
- Hosts: Amanda, Laura, and Kendra.

- **Favorite Books:**
- Amanda:
- Explored Arthurian legend in high school.
- Mentioned "Something in the Mist" and "The Mists of Avalon."
- Enjoys reading self-help books.
- Laura:
- Favorite fiction book: "Pride and Prejudice."
- Also loves the Harry Potter series.
- Enjoys exploring human behavior in literature.

- **Honeymoon Destinations:**
- Amanda:
- Got married quickly in Vegas during residency.
- Honeymooned in Cancun on a short break.
- Laura:
- Got married during a break between med school years.
- Honeymooned on Little Gasparilla Island in Florida.

- **Favorite Podcasts:**
- Laura:
- Enjoys "The Waking Up to Narcissism Podcast."
- Amanda:
- Listens to "The Drive" by Peter Attia for technical insights.
- Likes Mel Robbins, Brooke Castillo, and Corinne Crabtree.
- Kendra:
- Likes "Dr. Caroline Leaf" podcast.
- Enjoys "Mind Your Mental Mess" and "You Are Not Broken."

- **Favorite Date Night Restaurants:**
- Amanda prefers Retro Metro and Ocean Zen.
- Laura likes Amerigo and places with booths.
- Kendra enjoys Roboto Sushi Session and Mexican cuisine.

- **Last Vacation Destinations:**
- Amanda recently returned from Vegas.
- Laura's recent vacation was in Hawaii, particularly the Big Island.
- Kendra vacationed in the Outer Banks, revisiting a special place from her past.

- **Favorite Self-Care Activities:**
- Amanda:
- Enjoys relaxing baths, both for physical and mental relaxation.
- Values creating a life she doesn't need to escape from.
- Prioritizes self-care and saying no to things that don't align with her values.
- Laura:
- Practices meditation, prayer, and exercise.
- Values authentic connection through long hugs.
- Kendra:
- Values authenticity and making choices aligned with her values.
- Practices daily devotion and prayer

- **Closing Remarks:**
- Hosts emphasize building a life they don't need a vacation from.
- Mention a Black Friday offer for their audience.
- Promote an upcoming webinar on November 16th at 12 PM Central Time.
- Encourage healthcare professionals to remember their worth and impact.

This episode offered listeners insights into the hosts' personal lives and their perspectives on self-care and authenticity. It also included promotional information about upcoming offers and webinars.

Join us for our FREE class, "What's the ICD-10 code for Injury Sustained in a Dumpster Fire?" Thursday, November 16th at noon central. Visit us at www.thewholephysician.com for more information.

- Hosts: Amanda, Laura, Kendra

- Reminder to leave a review on the podcast

**Topic: Dolly Parton - An American Treasure and Philanthropist:**
- Dolly Parton's introduction as a country music legend and philanthropist
- Highlighting her Dollywood Foundation and the Imagination Library, which sends one book per month to enrolled children from birth until kindergarten
- Mention of her contributions to improving graduation rates in her hometown through a buddy program and college funding
- Discussion on how her foundation projects bring jobs and tax revenues to depressed regions

**Dolly Parton's Integrity and Confidence:**
- Mention of Dolly Parton's integrity in refusing to sell her song "I Will Always Love You" to Elvis with a 50 percent profit share
- The financial success that came from Whitney Houston's cover of the song
- Emphasis on Dolly's confidence in knowing who she is despite others' opinions

**Dolly Parton's Wisdom Quotes:**
- Exploration of various Dolly Parton quotes and their significance
- "Let people be wrong about you" - Emphasizing the gift of not caring about others' opinions
- "The magic is inside you" - Encouragement to recognize one's inner potential
- "Hard to be a diamond in a rhinestone world" - Reflecting on the challenges Dolly faced and her authenticity
- "Make a point to appreciate all the little things in life" - Discussing the power of gratitude and mindfulness
- "I'm not going to limit myself just because people won't accept the fact that I can do something else" - Encouragement to pursue one's passions and not be limited by societal expectations
- Mention of Dolly's honesty about her past affair and taking responsibility for it

**Conclusion and Upcoming Events:**
- Expressing love for Dolly Parton and her inspiring qualities
- Teaser for a Black Friday sale and upcoming webinar on November 16th
- Encouragement for healthcare professionals to visit the website for more information
- Closing message: "You are whole, you are a gift to medicine, and the work you do matters."

 Join us for our FREE class on how to survive the dumpster fire of medicine, "What's the ICD-10 code for Injury Sustained in a Dumpster fFire?"

What's the Remedy for the Physician Burnout Crisis? with Sunny Smith, M.D.

Introduction:
- Amanda, Laura, and Kendra welcome listeners back to the podcast.
- They introduce their special guest, Dr. Sunny Smith, a pioneer in physician coaching.
- Dr. Sunny Smith is a family physician and a coach who has made a significant impact on physician well-being.
- Dr. Smith shares her journey into coaching after a life-changing bicycle accident.
- She highlights her passion for improving medical culture.

Segment 1: Getting to Know Dr. Sunny Smith
- The hosts express their excitement about having Dr. Sunny Smith on the podcast.
- Dr. Sunny Smith talks about the full-circle experience of being on the show.
- She mentions losing her video window during the podcast recording.

Segment 2: The Role of Coaching in Physician Well-Being
- Dr. Sunny Smith discusses recent studies supporting coaching as an intervention for physician well-being.
- She emphasizes that coaching provides a sense of agency and self-efficacy for physicians.
- Dr. Smith mentions the published randomized controlled trials in physicians' coaching.
- She stresses the importance of changing the system while utilizing coaching as a complementary tool.
- The hosts express their admiration for the impact of coaching in the medical field.

Segment 3: Coaching Research and Effectiveness
- Dr. Sunny Smith delves into the details of coaching research and its evolution over the past years.
- She highlights the effectiveness of coaching in reducing burnout among physicians.
- Dr. Smith shares data from her coaching program, indicating significant improvements in professional fulfillment and self-compassion.
- She discusses the lasting effects of coaching interventions beyond the program's duration.

Segment 4: Implementing Coaching in Medical Training
- The hosts inquire about the feasibility of implementing coaching in medical training, especially in emergency medicine.
- Dr. Sunny Smith suggests the importance of individualized and flexible approaches to coaching.
- She mentions the challenges faced by emergency medicine physicians and the need for workplace flexibility and accommodations.
- The hosts and Dr. Smith explore the idea of creating systems that prioritize physician well-being and advocating for a deeper bench in healthcare institutions.

1. The Crisis of Medicine:
- Dr. Smith compares the crisis of physician burnout to other major events, such as airline disasters, to emphasize its significance.
- She notes that medicine, particularly in the post-pandemic era, is facing a crisis, with over a hundred thousand physicians leaving clinical medicine.

2. Personal Experience:
- Dr. Smith and the hosts are burnout survivors, and some of them even temporarily quit medicine.
- They stress the transformational power of the coaching and training they've received and their passion for sharing these tools with other physicians.

3. The Broken System:
- While acknowledging that the healthcare system is deeply flawed, Dr. Smith emphasizes that physicians can take steps to improve their own well-being and health.
- She highlights the risk of worsening crises if action is not taken, including shortages of physicians in emergency departments.

4. The Opportunity for Change:
- Dr. Smith encourages listeners to see the crisis as an opportunity for positive change in the healthcare system.
- She emphasizes the need for support systems and coaching for physicians who are struggling, even before they reach a breaking point.

5. The Role of Coaching:
- Dr. Smith draws parallels with coaching in other fields, such as sports and business, where it's common practice to support individuals in reaching their full potential.
- She highlights the financial and performance incentives for organizations in providing coaching to physicians.

6. Normalizing Coaching in Medicine:
- Dr. Smith envisions a future where coaching is a standard part of a physician's career development.
- She discusses the importance of having a support system that doesn't pathologize physicians but normalizes their experiences.

7. Taking Action:
- Dr. Smith encourages physicians to take one actionable step towards addressing burnout, whether it's seeking coaching or scheduling time off.
- She emphasizes the importance of recognizing one's own humanity and need for support.

Conclusion:
The episode concludes with Dr. Smith providing information on how listeners can connect with her through the Empowering Women Physicians Facebook group and her podcast. She also directs interested individuals to her website for references related to the topics discussed in the episode. The hosts express their gratitude to Dr. Smith for her pioneering work in addressing physician burnout.

https://empoweringwomenphysicians.com/

Check out free resources and join our Weekly Well Check at https://thewholephysician.com/

Episode #85: Client Success Story--Overcoming Burnout with Theresa Navarette, M.D. 

Introduction:

• Hosts: Amanda, Laura, Kendra
• Reminder to leave a review

Guest Introduction:

• Special guest: Dr. Teresa Navarrete, EM physician and burnout survivor
• Dr. Navarette's journey from nursing to becoming a physician.
• A snapshot of her life with her husband (also an ER doctor) and five children.
• Her recent interest in physician wellness and burnout.

Life Before Coaching:

• Dr. Navarrete's experience of burnout and its impact.
• Feeling anxious, risk-averse, and drained.
• Her shift from enjoying patient interactions to feeling them as transactional.
• The guilt of considering staying at home as a mother and a well-educated physician.
• Feeling trapped in her career.

Exploring Pre-Coaching Solutions:

• Attending the Physician Moms Group conference and meeting Amanda and Kendra.
• Joining a wellness retreat and discovering the concept of physician wellness.
• Realizing that burnout is a widespread issue among doctors.

Choosing Coaching:

• Meeting a friend who had positive coaching experiences.
• The role of the coaching package in her decision.
• The sense of relief and validation she felt during her initial coaching call.
• The importance of finding a safe space to discuss vulnerabilities and struggles.
• The power of coaching in reframing thoughts and experiences.

Key Takeaways from Coaching:

1. Having Your Own Back: Realizing the importance of self-support and not being overly critical.
2. Choosing Your Path: Recognizing that career decisions should be driven by personal choice rather than feeling pushed out.
3. Objective Circumstance: The significance of analyzing situations objectively to prevent negative thought spirals.
4. Acknowledging Feelings: The value of acknowledging and accepting emotions, even in high-pressure situations.

Conclusion:

• The hosts and Dr. Navarrete's shared experiences and insights.
• Encouraging physicians to seek support and acknowledge their feelings.
• The positive impact of coaching on physician burnout and well-being.

Outro:

• Thanking Dr. Navarrete for sharing her story.
• Encouraging listeners to explore coaching as a tool for addressing burnout.
• Reminding everyone to leave a review and support the podcast.

Additional Episode Highlights:

• Recognizing Burnout and Anxiety: Dr. Navarrete reflects on a critical moment in her career when she felt overwhelmed by anxiety and self-doubt. She discusses the importance of acknowledging these feelings rather than suppressing them, realizing that anxiety is a normal response to challenging situations.

• Embracing Imperfection: Dr. Navarrete emphasizes the need to let go of the quest for perfection in medicine. She shares how she learned to set her own priorities during her shifts, ensuring that she provides the best care for her patients, even in a demanding environment.

• The Impact of Coaching: Dr. Navarrete discusses how coaching played a pivotal role in her journey towards wellness. She highlights the power of having a coach to work through challenges, shift perspectives, and develop a healthier mindset.

• Creating Awareness: Dr. Navarrete emphasizes the importance of open conversations about burnout and wellness within the medical community. She encourages healthcare professionals to share their experiences and support one another.

• Taking Control: Dr. Navarrete addresses the reality that changing the healthcare system is a long-term endeavor. She underscores the importance of taking control of one's own well-being and not letting external factors determine one's self-worth.

• The Path Forward: Dr. Navarrete shares her commitment to promoting wellness in medicine and helping fellow healthcare professionals navigate burnout. She discusses her involvement in wellness committees and initiatives aimed at creating positive change within the medical field.

Conclusion: In closing, Dr. Navarrete's story serves as an inspiring reminder that burnout is a widespread issue in healthcare, but it is possible to find a path to wellness. We encourage our listeners to reach out for support, whether through coaching or by joining wellness initiatives within their organizations. Thank you for tuning in to The Drive-Time Debrief. If you found this episode valuable, please subscribe, rate, and leave a review. Your feedback helps us continue to bring you valuable tools to help you thrive in your medical career.

RESOURCE: WILD MED ADVENTURES WELLNESS LEADERSHIP RETREATS

If you would like to chat with a coach for free to get some relief from your exhaustion, frustration, stress and burnout, click here to schedule a visit to Physician Wellness Triage.

Disclaimer: The information provided in this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and should not be considered as medical or professional advice. Consult with a qualified healthcare provider for personalized guidance.

Title: Achieving Dreams: A Conversation with Dr. Susie Sharpe

Introduction:

• Welcome back to the podcast with hosts Amanda, Laura, and Kendra.
• Special guest star: Dr. Susie Sharpe, an internist who has achieved her dream of becoming an artist.

Segment 1: Dr. Sharpe's Remarkable Journey

• Dr. Sharpe's background as a first-generation immigrant from Korea.
• Her childhood dream of becoming an artist and the challenges her family faced upon moving to the U.S.
• The pivotal moment that led her to pursue a career in medicine.
• Her journey to becoming a physician, including language barriers and supporting herself.
• Completing her MD and residency training at Yale.

Segment 2: Rediscovering the Dream

• Dr. Sharpe's busy life as a physician and mother.
• The wake-up call that reminded her of her dream to become an artist.
• How she started studying and practicing art while balancing her medical career.
• The role of art in bringing joy and healing to others.

Segment 3: Dr. Sharpe's Artistic Journey

• Her initial art exhibitions in Springfield, Missouri.
• Expanding her art career to international galleries.
• Her art's presence on social media, with a focus on female physicians as patrons.
• Charitable work through her art.

Segment 4: The Four Keys to Achieving Dreams

• Key #1: Clarity in setting ambitious goals.
• Key #2: Visualization as a tool for clarity and focus.
• Key #3: Overcoming obstacles, including self-doubt, excuses, fear, and unworthiness.
• Key #4: The importance of showing up, even at 20% of your best effort.

Segment 5: Closing Thoughts

• Dr. Sharpe emphasizes the preciousness of time and the need to do something meaningful every day.
• Encouragement to live an extraordinary life made up of small, extraordinary days.
• Gratitude for the listeners and an invitation to watch Dr. Sharpe's TED Talk.

Outro:

• Thank you to Dr. Susie Sharpe for sharing her inspiring story.
• A reminder to the audience that they are a gift to medicine, and their work matters.
• Signing off with love for the listeners.

4 Keys to Achieving Your Dream TED Talk

https://www.susiesharpe.net/

On Becoming an Essentialist, Part 2 

• Recap: A revisit to the main points from Part 1 of the Essentialism discussion.
• Encouragement: A gentle nudge for listeners to read or listen to Essentialism by Greg McKeown for enriched comprehension.

• Agency: An exploration into the power and responsibility each person holds to navigate their lives, supported by Laura's journey through burnout and reclaiming her power of choice.
• Prioritization: Delving into the essence of recognizing and focusing on what truly matters, and the potential peril of sidelining core values amidst the sea of “important” things.

• Importance of Simplicity
  • Kendra underscores the potency of simplicity and adhering to the K.I.S.S. principle (Keep It Simple, Silly).
  • Citing Warren Buffett’s meticulous investment strategy that concentrated on a few sure-shot businesses.
• Irreplaceability of Time
  • The irrefutable value of time as a non-renewable resource, and how aligning our schedules with top priorities makes a world of difference.
• Strategic Trade-offs
  • Unraveling the necessity of making informed decisions, with an exemplar note on the strategic choices that catapulted Southwest Airlines to success.

• An Intrinsic Ability: An exploration of our innate ability to choose, illuminated by McKeown’s quote: "The ability to choose cannot be taken away or even given away. It can only be forgotten."
• Overcoming Limitations: A deep dive into understanding and overcoming learned helplessness, punctuated with insights from Marty Seligman’s experiments.

• Amanda’s Insight: A look at Chick-fil-A's mastery in focusing and excelling in selected domains.
• Laura’s Perspective: She underscores the gentle power of saying no and how prioritizing helps maintain one's optimal self.
• Kendra’s Thoughts: The idea of scheduling "do nothing" times for mental clarity and wellness.

• Focusing on Core Values: The importance of unwavering adherence to one’s values amidst numerous distractions and societal pressures.
• Characteristics of an Essentialist: Highlights from Amanda on discernment, valuing quiet time, recognizing priority, and the pivotal role of play, sleep, and focused work.

• Navigating through the paradox of choice in today’s context, with Kendra enlightening on the role of discernment and sieving "the trivial many."

• Reflection: A contemplative note underscoring that while anything is doable, not everything is worth pursuing.
• Recommendation: A warm recommendation to explore Greg McKeown’s "Essentialism" for further insights into living intentionally and with purpose.

Note: The above show notes give a succinct summary of the podcast discussion on Essentialism. To dive deeper, listen to the full podcast episode or delve into Essentialism by Greg McKeown.

On Becoming an Essentialist

• A warm welcome back to our listeners and a reminder to leave a review to help others discover the podcast.

• Exploration of Essentialism by Greg McKeown.
  • A classic recommendation for insights into management, business, and life organization.
  • Key theme: Navigating towards a life you genuinely desire through conscious and deliberate choices.
  • McKeown also provides insights through his audiobook narration and podcast.

• Main Concepts from "Essentialism":
  • Navigating through the myriad of tasks by discerning vital ones from trivial ones.
  • A systematic approach: identifying, eliminating, and simplifying.
  • A strong emphasis on proactive choice-making, contrasted with reactive actions.
  • Highlighting the principle of trade-offs: affirming to something implicitly negates something else.
• Choosing Activities with Intention:
  • Evaluating activities based on an "hourly rate" to ascertain their value to your life.
  • Real-life examples, like delegating laundry, shed light on practicing essentialism in mundane tasks.
• Personal Experiences and Reflections:
  • Sharing instances where aligning actions with personal values paved the way for a fulfilling life.
  • The dangers of the mindset: "If I can, I should."
  • An analysis of societal expectations and their impact on individual choices and stress levels.
• Analyzing Overextension:
  • Why do capable individuals tend to bite off more than they can chew?
  • The role of societal roles, expectations, and overwhelming choices leading to unforeseen stress and commitments.

• Parenting amid Social Pressures:
  • A dive into the dilemmas faced by parents in today's societal norms.
  • Societal pressures: Enrolling children in various extracurricular activities and adhering to prevalent educational norms.
  • A call to parents to stay true to their values amidst external pressures.
• Becoming an Essentialist:
  • A three-step approach: Explore & Evaluate, Eliminate, and Execute.
  • Tips and strategies to declutter physically and mentally, citing practical examples like a closet decluttering system.
• Modeling Essentialism for Kids:
  • The importance of teaching children value-driven activities and choices.
  • A conversation on how societal and scheduling pressures might rob children of cherishing genuine experiences.
• Legacy and Generational Influence:
  • Reflections on leaving a legacy that emphasizes the quality of life over mere busyness.
  • Insights into setting an exemplary precedent for future generations to value authenticity and meaningful engagements.

• Acknowledging the liberating effect of practicing essentialism and the newfound appreciation for the word "no."
• A parting call to listeners to prioritize their life and values.
• A thank-you note to listeners for their time and engagement, along with an invitation to explore more resources on the website.

Welcome back to another episode of our podcast, with hosts Amanda, Laura, and Kendra exploring the theme of embracing discomfort for unlocking personal and well-being growth. Today's discussion draws inspiration from an article by therapist James Killian, which outlines the nine significant benefits of mastering discomfort.

Section 1: Reducing Procrastination & Embracing Exercise

• Hosts: Amanda, Laura, Kendra
• Focus: The significance of confronting discomfort, concentrating on minimizing procrastination, and incorporating exercise.
• Key Discussions:
  • Combatting Procrastination: Kendra shares her personal strategies for prioritizing and tackling uncomfortable tasks, highlighting the subsequent relief and accomplishment.
  • Exercise – A Pillar of Discomfort: The hosts reflect on the initial resistance to exercise and its myriad benefits, sharing anecdotes of satisfaction and holistic improvement.
  • Reframing Discomfort for Progress: Amanda offers insights on viewing discomfort as a stepping stone to progress and the importance of choosing growth-oriented paths.

Section 2: Learning, Brain Health, & Managing Clutter

• Topics: Delving into the advantages of acquiring new skills, decluttering, and the role of embracing discomfort in enhancing brain health.
• Key Insights:
  • Learning and Brain Health: Amanda discusses the potential long-term brain health benefits of learning new languages and embracing technology.
  • Joy in Embracing Discomfort: Laura and Amanda share their experiences of growing through discomfort and adopting strategies for decluttering.
  • Perfectionism, Self-Compassion, and Email Management: The hosts talk about managing perfectionist tendencies, the significance of self-compassion, and share practical tips on efficient email management.

Section 3: Financial Health & Boundaries

• Focus: Achieving financial independence and the importance of establishing healthy boundaries, especially for physicians.
• Key Discussions:
  • Financial Independence: Amanda underscores the empowering nature of taking initial steps towards financial freedom and the need for authenticity.
  • Healthy Boundaries: Laura elaborates on the necessity of setting boundaries, with insights from Brene Brown, and discusses the relationship between discomfort and well-being.
  • Confrontation, Values, and Requests: In-depth discussion on handling boundaries, responding to requests, and maintaining personal values.

• Kendra wraps up with actionable advice for personal growth and extends an invitation to listeners to come see us at ACEP at the Revitalize booth.

• James Killian’s Article on Mastering Discomfort
• Come Up For Air by Nick Sonnenberg
• The Wealthy Barber by David Chilton
• The Automatic Millionaire by David Bach

Connect with us on social media or via email, and share your thoughts or suggest topics you'd like us to explore in future episodes. And, don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review the podcast!

Embarrassment and Humiliation

1. Introduction

• Amanda welcomes listeners back to the podcast.
• Laura and Kendra introduce themselves.
• Amanda's reminder for listeners to leave a five-star review.

2. Topic Introduction: Emotional Granularity

• The importance of giving words to feelings.
• Using language to process and take ownership of emotions.
• Focus of the episode: humiliation and embarrassment in medicine.

3. Previous Discussion: Podcast #60

• Source: Brene Brown's Atlas of the Heart.
• Recap on the terms guilt and shame: Guilt as an emotion experienced when doing something wrong and Shame as a feeling that there's something inherently wrong with oneself.
• Relating guilt and shame to humiliation and embarrassment.

4. Humiliation: Definition and Example

• Being seen as unworthy of connection and feeling unjustly degraded.
• Impact on personal identity.
• Example: a med student not passing an exam and being shamed on social media.

5. Positive Perspective in Medicine

• Anecdote: the significance of earning an MD irrespective of rank.
• Reference to Malcolm Gladwell's book.
• Emphasis on perspective and self-worth.

6. Kendra on Class Rankings and Talent

• The idea that not everyone can be top-ranked.
• The significance of clinical skills over just academic performance.
• Recognizing the variety of talents in medicine.

7. Embarrassment: Definition and Differences from Humiliation

• Temporary feelings everyone experiences.
• Not an attack on personal identity.
• Examples include dress mishaps and unintentional remarks.

8. Kendra on Competition and Comparison in Medicine

• Discussing the prevalence of humiliation and embarrassment in the medical field.
• The competitive nature of medical school.
• How these feelings can be propagated during medical rotations.

9. The Fears Patients Face

• Concerns about physical procedures.
• Emotional fears and avoidance of judgment.
• The consequences of avoiding medical attention.

10. Self-awareness and Interactions

• Recognizing our biases.
• The importance of individualizing patient care.
• Amanda reflects on her personal experiences.

11. Influences and Judgments Among Medical Staff

• Laura shares an anecdote about pre-judgments.
• The dangers of making assumptions.

12. Guilt, Embarrassment, and Humiliation in the Medical Field

• Exploring the negative impacts on relationships and patient care.
• The role of self-awareness.

13. Fostering Collaboration and Respect

• The importance of valuing team contributions.
• Addressing disagreements respectfully.

14. Conclusion and Announcements

• Announcing the free webinar: "What's the ICD-10 code for Injury Sustained in a Dumpster Fire".
• Instructions on sign-up and further information.
• Parting words and encouragement.

 Links Mentioned:

• What's the ICD-10 code for Injury Sustained in a Dumpster Fire?
• www.thewholephysician.com

Hey friend 👋
Ever find yourself saying yes when your soul is screaming NO?
Still picking up that extra shift, joining one more committee, or trying to make everyone happy… while secretly feeling overwhelmed and low-key resentful?

This episode is your loving wake-up call. 💥

Join Drs. Amanda, Laura, and Kendra as they dive deep into one of the core healing practices for codependence in medicine:
💥 Boundaries that are clear, kind, and consistent.

You’ll learn:
✅ The 3 types of boundaries you need to know
✅ Real-world scripts to help you say “no” with kindness and confidence
✅ Why clear is kind (and overexplaining is not)
✅ How healthy boundaries actually build stronger relationships
✅ Why your discomfort is a powerful compass—not a stop sign 🚦

💡 Whether you’re burnt out, people-pleasing, or just ready to reclaim your time, this episode will help you reset, recharge, and re-align with your true self.

Because boundaries aren’t selfish…
They’re sacred.

🔔 Homework Challenge
This week, try one of these:

• Say “no” with kindness 💬

• Pause before you commit ⏸️

• Let discomfort guide you instead of scare you 😅

You are allowed to have needs.
You are allowed to protect your peace.
You are allowed to say, “I love you… and no.”

🔥 Favorite Quote:

"You are not responsible for others. You are responsible to them—with respect and honesty." – Pia Mellody

💌 Got thoughts or questions? Email us at podcast@thewholephysician.com
📱Follow us on Instagram @thewholephysician for daily wisdom & boundary-boosting inspiration
🌟 Don’t forget to leave us a 5-star review — it helps more healers heal.

Until next time...
✨ You are whole.
✨ You are a gift to medicine.
✨ And the work you do matters.

Title: Connected Conversations & Nonviolent Communication with Dr. Tony Overbay

1. Introduction:

   • Hosts: Amanda, Laura, Kendra.
   • Special guest: Tony Overbay, referred to as "Doctor of Narcissism."

2. Mentions & Promotions:

   • Reminder for listeners to leave a review and comment.
   • Tony Overbay’s podcast: Virtual Couch.
   • Other content from Tony:
     • "Waking Up to Narcissism" podcast and premium version.
     • Podcasts with his children: "The Mind, The Mirror and Me" and "Murder on the Couch."

3. Discussion Topics:

   • Importance of effective communication for physicians.
   • Tony's concept of the "Pre-pillar" before diving into the "Four Pillars of a Connected Conversation."
   • Introduction to "Nonviolent Communication" by Marshall Rosenberg.
     • Misunderstanding of the title and initial reluctance to explore it.
     • Concept of violence in communication.
     • Key lessons:
       1. Separating observation from judgment.
       2. Connecting actions and requests to specific needs.
       3. Applying the same principles in self-talk.

• Deep Dive into Nonviolent Communication:

  • Separating observation from judgment:
    • Tony’s example: Son not doing homework leads to a judgment of laziness.
    • Consequences of assuming someone isn’t being honest based on our judgments.
    • Observations and judgments in faith communities and personal relationships.
    • Importance of truly hearing someone's feelings without preconceived judgments.
  • Question for Doctors:
    • Does the concept of separating observation from judgment apply in the medical field?
    • Challenges faced by doctors in having to make quick diagnoses.
    • The variable nature of patient responses and potential biases.

• Doctors’ Perspective:

  • Importance of separating a medical judgment from moral judgment.
  • Renewal of the DEA certificate and recent training requirements:
    • An increased emphasis on treating people, including those with addiction, with respect.
    • Acknowledgement of past training inadequacies in treating people struggling with addiction.
    • The evolving awareness in the medical community towards compassionate care.
  • Emergency physicians: Need for quick assessment but also understanding the importance of not placing a moral judgment on the patient.

• Nocebo Effect Discussion:

  • Brief mention of the concept of nocebo effect versus the well-known placebo effect.
  • Importance of patients’ beliefs and mindset on their healing process.

  • The writer passionately delves into the intricate nature of human communication, highlighting the psychological, emotional, and even physical implications of our interactions. Here's a concise summary of the third chunk:

    Understanding and Impact of Words

    • Doctors & Authority Figures: Their words can have unintended consequences. For instance, focusing on a patient's low chances of survival can negatively influence the patient’s mindset. The speaker recalls previous experiences where they might have unintentionally affected patients with their words. They emphasize the importance of being factual yet optimistic.

    • Expectation Effect: The power of one's expectations and beliefs can influence their physical well-being. A book, "The Expectation Effect", and another titled "Mind Over Medicine" by Lisa Rankin provide instances where patients' health changed dramatically based on their beliefs and what they heard. Some patients improved believing in the effectiveness of a treatment, only to worsen after hearing negative news about the treatment.

    • Mind-Body Connection: Western medicine often overlooks the profound connection between the mind and body, a connection that other traditions might address more holistically. The speaker believes that communication has a significant role to play in this connection.

    • Observing & Judging: People are naturally observant and often pass judgments based on their observations. Such judgments are not always accurate, and they can stem from personal biases or experiences. Using an example of people-watching with their son-in-law, the writer illustrates how easily we jump to conclusions based on appearances or preconceived notions.

    • Parent-Child Dynamics: The continuous cycle of misunderstanding and defense between parents and children can be harmful. It leads to preconceived notions and defensive behaviors which prevent genuine communication. Over time, the repeated emotional responses become habitual and override logical responses.

    • Relational Frames: Each individual associates different feelings and meanings to the same word, based on personal experiences and upbringing. This causes challenges in communication, as people might not be understanding each other in the way they intend to.

    • Differentiation: Emphasizes the importance of distinguishing one's thoughts and feelings from another person's. Effective communication requires understanding and empathy.

      1. Judgement vs. Observation: The speaker suggests that separating observation from judgment can lead to self-awareness and growth. Instead of getting defensive when someone offers a critique, they suggest treating it as information and deciding if it has merit.

      2. Knowing oneself: Understanding oneself deeply means recognizing when someone else doesn't truly know who you are. This self-awareness helps in avoiding unproductive arguments.

      3. Four Pillars for Effective Communication:

         • Pillar One: Assume good intentions. This is about giving the benefit of the doubt and believing that most people don't intentionally try to hurt or undermine others. However, if it's challenging to assume good intentions, one should consider that there may be reasons why someone behaves a certain way.
         • Pillar Two: Refrain from telling someone they're wrong, even if you believe they are. This is about avoiding immediate defensive reactions that can derail conversations.
         • Pillar Three: Ask questions before making comments. This is about understanding someone's perspective more deeply before offering an opinion or reaction.
         • Pillar Four: Stay present and lean into the conversation without resorting to a victim mentality.

      4. Using the Four Pillars in a Scenario: Tony uses an example of a husband and wife misunderstanding to illustrate the application of the pillars. By applying the pillars, both parties can feel heard, leading to a more fulfilling resolution.

      5. Turning into the Victim: Tony mentions that often, when faced with criticism or uncomfortable conversations, some people may adopt a victim mentality to divert attention from the issue at hand. This tactic often leaves the original concern unaddressed.

      6. Here's how to apply the teachings in personal relationships:

         1. Practice Active Listening: When your partner speaks, make sure to give them your undivided attention. Don't interrupt, make judgments, or try to find solutions immediately. Instead, try to understand their perspective.

         2. Use "I" Statements: Instead of pointing fingers or playing the blame game, express your feelings using "I" statements. This reduces defensiveness and makes the conversation more about understanding each other rather than arguing.

         3. Ask Open-Ended Questions: Instead of asking yes or no questions, ask questions that make the other person think and express themselves. This can lead to a deeper understanding.

         4. Validate: Even if you don't agree, it's crucial to validate your partner's feelings and experiences. Just acknowledging that their feelings are valid can go a long way in building trust and understanding.

         5. Avoid Assuming: Instead of assuming you know what your partner feels or thinks, ask them. This prevents misunderstandings and unnecessary conflicts.

         6. Self-awareness and Growth: It's essential to be self-aware and be willing to grow. If you notice patterns in your behavior that might be contributing to conflicts, be open to changing and evolving.

         7. Seek Help if Needed: Sometimes, it might be beneficial to seek couples therapy or counseling to navigate complex issues.

         8. Patience: Remember that change doesn't happen overnight. Be patient with yourself and your partner. Celebrate the small victories and understand that both of you are learning and growing.

         In the end, the key is mutual respect, understanding, and a genuine desire to understand each other. If both parties are willing, applying these teachings can significantly improve the quality of personal relationships.

    • Tony's approach is a methodical way to handle conversations that could potentially turn confrontational. By implementing these pillars, people can navigate tough conversations in a way that promotes understanding and connection rather than conflict.

  • Join us for our free webinar, "What's the ICD-10 Code for Injury Sustained in a Dumpster Fire?" Wednesday, September 27th at noon central. Click here save your spot!
  • Revitalize Networking Event at ACEP: Click here to reserve your spot: https://www.peoplealwayshcc.com/em-revitalized-networking-event

Reframing Discomfort for Personal Growth

Part 1: Introduction to the Motivational Triad

• The motivational triad consists of seeking pleasure, avoiding pain, and conserving energy.
• It served primitive humans well for survival but can hinder personal growth in modern times.
• The brain prefers familiar, low-energy thought patterns, even if they are not beneficial.

Part 2: Embracing Discomfort for Growth

• Discomfort is often a sign of potential growth.
• The hosts emphasize the importance of reframing discomfort as an opportunity for progress.
• They discuss the idea that discomfort can be motivating and lead to personal development.
• The concept of emotional granularity, labeling emotions, and their power.

Part 3: Examples of Embracing Discomfort

• The hosts share examples from research studies where embracing discomfort led to personal growth.
• Encouraging individuals to see discomfort as a signal of self-growth can lead to motivation, persistence, and openness to learning.
• Mention the importance of trying new things and avoiding complacency.

Part 4: Encouraging Action and Closing Remarks

• The hosts encourage listeners to choose discomfort that leads to personal growth.
• They discuss the benefits of facing discomfort and taking action rather than avoiding it.

Upcoming Webinar Announcement

• Back by popular demand, our free webinar, What's the ICD-10 Code for Injury Sustained in a Dumpster Fire?  is happening! September 27th at 12:00 PM Central. 

Register Here for "What's the ICD-10 Code for Injury Sustained in a Dumpster Fire?" 

Podcast Show Notes: Forgiving Ourselves and Moving Forward

In this episode, Amanda, Laura, and Kendra discuss the importance of forgiving oneself and moving forward. We address the tendency to hold onto mistakes and regrets, how these feelings can lead to negative emotions and even depression, and strategies for self-forgiveness.

Introduction:

• Amanda introduces the show and reminds listeners to rate and review the podcast.
• Laura introduces the topic of forgiving oneself and its importance for personal progress and well-being.
• The hosts acknowledge that mistakes are inevitable in a medical career and can lead to carrying negative emotions.

Importance of Forgiving Ourselves:

• Laura discusses the significance of forgiving oneself and the impact of past mistakes on self-perception.
• Kendra highlights the connection between self-forgiveness, shame, guilt, interpersonal relationships, and decision-making.
• They emphasize the link between not forgiving oneself and increased risk of depression and anxiety.

Personal Stories and Learning from Mistakes:

• Amanda shares a personal story related to self-forgiveness and recalls the idea from "The Four Agreements" about humans punishing themselves for mistakes.
• Kendra narrates a medical case that weighed heavily on her and led to changes in her practice and decision-making.
• Laura talks about the necessity of mistakes in shaping medical practice and improving patient care.

Overcoming Negative Self-Talk:

• The hosts discuss the inner critic and the inner protector as sub-personalities within the mind.
• Laura provides insights from Dr. Rick Hanson on cultivating the inner protector to counter the critical voice.
• They explore how acknowledging caring relationships and one's own good qualities can help build self-forgiveness.

Steps to Self-Forgiveness:

1. Start with the feeling of being cared about and cultivate the inner protector.
2. Consider moral faults, unskillfulness, and other aspects of the situation.
3. Sort the situation and assign feelings of guilt or remorse where appropriate.
4. Take responsibility and feel it, then reflect on lessons learned.
5. Make amends and seek forgiveness from the inner protector.
6. Repeat these steps to rewire the brain and promote self-forgiveness over time.

Conclusion:

• The hosts emphasize the need to release the grip of the past and forgive oneself to move forward and be the best version.
• They encourage self-forgiveness not only for personal well-being but also to set an example for others.
• Reminder! Our popular webinar, "What's the ICD-10 Code for Injury Sustained in a Dumpster Fire?" is coming back by popular demand, Wednesday September 27th at noon Central time. Click the link below to find out more.  

Register for "What's the ICD-10 Code for Injury Sustained in a Dumpster Fire?" 

Just One Thing, by Rick Hanson, Ph.D.

Register Here for "What's the ICD-10 Code for Injury Sustained in a Dumpster Fire"

Choosing your Habits

• Housekeeping: Encouragement for listeners to review, rate, and share the podcast for visibility.
• Announcement of upcoming webinar on anti-burnout mindset techniques.

Discussion: Atomic Habits by James Clear

Key Principles:

1. Small Habits Make a Huge Difference:

   • Emphasis on small habits and their significant impact over time.
   • The analogy of a ship's rudder to illustrate tiny course corrections leading to substantial changes.
   • Importance of small, consistent improvements (1% better each day) to yield remarkable results.

2. Focus on Systems Instead of Goals:

   • Highlighting the difference between goals (results) and systems (actions).
   • The need to focus on creating effective systems that lead to desired results.
   • Encouragement to shift attention from goals to actions and processes.

3. Learn Identity-Based Habits:

   • Discussing the power of self-identity in shaping behavior.
   • The idea that current actions reflect one's self-perceived identity.
   • Encouragement to challenge negative self-labels and adopt a positive self-identity.

The Four Laws of Behavior Change:

1. Make It Obvious:

   • Exploring cues that trigger habits.
   • Examples of cues for positive habits, like placing fruit in a visible location.

2. Make It Attractive:

   • Exploring the craving phase of habit formation.
   • Tying desired actions to enjoyable activities, creating positive associations.

3. Make It Easy:

   • Emphasis on simplicity and automation in habit formation.
   • Starting with small, manageable actions and gradually building on them.

4. Make It Satisfying:

   • Discussing rewards and dopamine reinforcement.
   • Using rewards, habit trackers, and positive self-talk to reinforce desired behavior.

Breaking Bad Habits:

• Strategies for breaking bad habits using the four laws of behavior change in reverse.
• Making bad habits less obvious, less attractive, more difficult, and unsatisfying.
• Importance of changing the story and self-identity associated with bad habits.

Shifting Mindset:

• Highlighting the significance of changing the perspective on habits.
• The concept of avoiding the "all or nothing" mindset.
• Promoting self-compassion and gradual change over perfectionism.

Neuro Cycle App and Habit Formation:

• Mentioning Dr. Caroline Leaf's NeuroCycle app for habit formation.
• Explaining the 21/42/63-day process to build and strengthen new neural pathways.
• Encouraging consistent practice and patience for habit transformation.

Webinar Announcement:

• Announcing the upcoming webinar: "What's the ICD-10 Code for Injuries Sustained in a Dumpster Fire."
• Details about the webinar's focus on anti-burnout techniques and personal growth.
•  Register here for "What's the ICD-10 Code for Injury Sustained in a Dumpster Fire?"

Your Future Self

Show Notes:

• Introduction to the Topic
  • Laura introduces the topic of "future you" and its importance.
  • Reflects on the perception of time and how we imagine our future selves.
• Visualizing the Future
  • Discusses an article by Mariana Pogosyan, PhD, about future self.
  • Considers the shortness of life in terms of weeks lived.
  • Talks about the challenge of imagining our future selves realistically.
• Importance of Future Self
  • Relates the concept of future self to achieving career goals (e.g., becoming a physician).
  • Explores the idea that many people perceive their future selves as distant and not real.
• Balancing Present and Future
  • Discusses the concept of "myopia" (overfocus on the present) and "hyperopia" (overdelaying gratification).
  • Explores examples of present indulgence at the expense of the future.
  • Highlights the need to make decisions that benefit both present and future selves.
• Strengthening the Connection with Future Self
  • Discusses strategies to connect with the best version of your future self.
  • Mentions the importance of imagining and feeling the best version of oneself.
• Advice from Future Self
  • Encourages listeners to seek advice from their future selves for present decision-making.
  • Offers examples of how future self's advice can guide actions and choices.
• Living in the Present
  • Emphasizes the significance of living in the present and finding happiness now.
  • Discusses the concept of happiness being in the present rather than at a future destination.
• Manifesting and Empowerment
  • Explores the practice of manifesting and raising one's vibration.
  • Discusses how embodying the best version of yourself leads to different actions and results.
• Accountability to Future Self
  • Talks about using future self as a source of accountability.
  • Reflects on the benefits of making choices that support future happiness.
• Taking Control of Your Story
  • Describes the process of taking control of one's life and creating a fulfilling narrative.
  • Emphasizes the importance of intentional decision-making for a better life story.

Click here to read the referenced article.

Referenced Eckhart Tolle video.

Click here to access the free mini-course for residents: 

Free Anti-burnout Resource for Residents

Join us as we interview Dr. Atashi Mandal, med/peds hospitalist and amazing human as she describes her experience in Wellness 911, our coaching plus CME course. She also shares with us some thoughts about the book The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, which are: 

• 1) Be impeccable with your word.
• 2) Don't take anything personally.
• 3) Don't make assumptions. 
• 4) Always do your best.

We discuss the application of these agreements, and how they integrate with our program. Atashi is an incredibly kind, wise, insightful, and brave person--you won't want to miss hearing her story!

In this episode we discuss why it matters to what your brain is paying attention.  There are several terms we discuss including:

• selective attention: tuning out unimportant details in order to focus on what matters
• mental filtering: focusing on the negative rather than the whole picture, negativity bias
• disqualifying the positive: minimizing the good things in our lives

Reframing and changing perspective is key, but is NOT the same as toxic positivity. It is acknowledging that there is both good and bad in the world, but choosing to focus on the good parts on purpose.

If you're stuck in negativity, we discuss ways to challenge your point of view. Eventually, with enough practice, neuroplasticity allows our default thoughts to be much more positive.

Some quotes:

• George Lucas: "Your focus determines your reality."
• Tony Robbins: "Your life is controlled by what you focus on," and "energy flows where your attention goes."

Invisible Gorilla Experiment

Medical Resident Anti-Burnout Mini-Course

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

If you're interested in a personal loan from Doc2Doc Lending, use our affiliate link: www.doc2doclending.com/thewholephysician

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance from Pattern, use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime 

In this episode, meet Tony Overbay, LMFT, Laura's favorite podcaster (besides Amanda and Kendra, of course). In addition to being a licensed marriage and family therapist, he is a popular podcaster and host of The Virtual Couch and Waking Up to Narcissism, as well as cohost of Murder on the Couch. Tony is also the developer of the The Path Back, an online course to help people recover from unhealthy coping mechanisms, in addition to his Magnetic Marriage workshop and course. 

In this episode Tony:

• shares his journey to becoming an LMFT from a career in the computer software industry
• how he became interested in narcissism
• describes narcissism and emotional immaturity
• explains the difference between Narcissistic Personality Disorder and narcissistic traits
• defines gaslighting and confabulation
• gives his rules for engaging with narcissists
• discusses trauma bonds, and so much more fascinating narcissism information!

To reach Tony, visit his website at https://www.tonyoverbay.com/. 

In this episode, meet Dara Kass, MD. She's an Emergency Physician who now works as Regional Director for Region 2 of the US Dept of Health and Human Services. She's here to talk about how she pivoted from working in traditional clinical medicine to working in government.

In this episode Dr. Kass:

• shares the inspiration behind FeminEM
• tells the story how she first got started in government
• explains how working in government can impact in healthcare access for all
• highlights different tasks she might do in a workday
• explains the difference, including ethical requirements, between elected, career, and appointed positions
• suggests different ways one can get started working in government
•  explains common misconceptions that clinical docs might not have considered
• advocates the importance of not politicizing access to equitable and safe healthcare, medications and treatments 
• highlights the healthcare workforce crisis and the need to revisit the sustainability of our careers

To reach Dr. Kass, email: Dara.Kass@hhs.gov

As we continue in this part 2 of our conversation with Rebel  Physician founder, Dr Kristin Yates, she explains "Five Ways Your Medical Training Has Failed You."

Highlights:

• The hustle culture
• Lack of emphasis on mental health
• No individualization
• Denial of play time
• Forced reliance on external validation

Whew, these are some hot topics and Dr Yates is not afraid to back down from any of them! Enjoy!

Contact Dr Yates:

Instagram: @kristinyatesdo 

Rebel Physician Podcast

rebelphysician.com

Rebel Physician Community

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

If you're interested in a personal loan from Doc2Doc Lending, use our affiliate link: www.doc2doclending.com/thewholephysician

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance from Pattern, use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime 

“You are not broken. You might just be codependent.”

In this eye-opening and compassion-filled episode, we continue our Codependence in Medicine series by zooming in on what codependence really is, where it comes from, and — most importantly — how we can heal.

✨ Spoiler alert: If you’ve ever felt like your worth is tied to how much you give, produce, or fix for others… this episode is for you.

We’re grounding this conversation in the brilliant work of Pia Mellody, who defined codependence as the result of childhood relational trauma that affects our self-esteem, boundaries, reality, needs, and self-expression. You’ll hear how these patterns show up not just in our homes — but in medical training, work culture, and the unrealistic expectations placed on doctors.

👶 Childhood patterns that still echo:

• “Go hug Grandma. Don’t be rude.”

• “Stop crying. You’re fine.”

• “Don’t be ridiculous.”

• “You don’t really need rest. You’re strong.”

All of these seemingly small moments teach us the same lie:
Your needs don’t matter.

But here’s the truth we’re claiming:
🌿 You are allowed to have boundaries.
🌿 You don’t need to earn rest.
🌿 Self-sacrifice is not love.
🌿 Healing is possible.

💥 This episode covers:

• Why codependence isn't just about “being too nice”

• How childhood experiences shape adult behaviors — especially in high-achieving professionals

• The 5 types of boundaries and how they’re often violated

• The link between burnout and developmental trauma

• Why it’s never too late to relearn your worth and reclaim your space

If you’ve ever felt invisible, exhausted, or guilty for saying “no,” let this episode be a gentle mirror — and a loving reminder that you’re not alone. The system isn’t broken because of you — it’s been breaking on top of you. But we can name it, untangle it, and choose something better.

“Children who aren’t allowed to have boundaries grow into adults who don’t know how to protect themselves.” — Pia Mellody

🎧 Listen in, share with a friend, and let’s start rewriting the rules of what it means to help — without losing ourselves.

📬 Email us at: podcast@thewholephysician.com
📱 Follow us on socials for daily inspiration
⭐️ Leave a review — and help more docs find their way home to themselves

In this episode, Kristin Yates, DO joins us to talk about Inappropriate Things Doctors Brag About (and why we keep doing it).

The reason we do this is likely because of both external and internal pressures, she says. External pressures in that it's what everyone else is doing. And internal pressures in that many of us have replaced our sense of inherent worthiness as a human with having to earn our worthiness through performance. 

On the list of misguided badges of honor:

• Exhaustion
• Being Busy
• Time without a Vacation
• High Patient Volume

Versus what we SHOULD be proud of:

• Spending quality time with fewer patients
• Resting every day and using our vacation time
• Cutting back hours if we need/want to
• Getting a full night of sleep
• Having a day of doing nothing

Doing this is seemingly an act of rebellion in our current medical system. But the more we start doing it, the more inroads we'll make in creating a better place for ourselves and those who follow.

Dr. Yates' Instagram

Dr. Yates' Rebel Physician Website

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

If you're interested in a personal loan from Doc2Doc Lending, use our affiliate link: www.doc2doclending.com/thewholephysician

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance from Pattern, use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime 

On today's episode we talk with Dr Christina Shenvi who candidly helps us understand that we can't buy more time, but we can be wise about the time we are given. She comes with an incredible academic pedigree including Princeton, Berkeley, Yale, and UNC. She’s a mom of 4, a practicing emergency physician, educator, keynote speaker, and leader. She’s going to talk with us about how she gets everything done with tips for time management.

Here are some highlights:

• Effort has three components: direction, intensity, and perseverance.
• Reflecting on if you are moving in the right direction and applying the right amount of intensity and persevering for only a given amount of time.
• How to approach a challenge:
  • 1. Priority: Spend time on the right things. (Can always make more money or invest money and earn interest. Can never make more time, yet we’re often more careful with our money than with how we invest our time.) Get clear on personal priorities and big values. Make sure you’re going the right direction. 
    2. Strategy: Work in the right way. Architect your day/time. Deep work, shallow work, allocating time and deciding ahead of time what you will work on. 
    3. Efficiency: Anything that requires little brainpower or that you do repeatedly, find ways to outsource, delegate, make efficient, or create shortcuts.
    4. Reflection: Activation barrier, and why managing time is all about managing emotions.

How to find Dr Shenvi:

website: timeforyourlife.org

email: shenvi@timeforyourlife.org

Twitter: @clshenvi

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/shenvi/

Books mentioned:

https://gregmckeown.com/books/essentialism/

https://comeupforair.com/

https://thework.com/instruction-the-work-byron-katie/

https://calnewport.com/writing/

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

If you're interested in a personal loan from Doc2Doc Lending, use our affiliate link: www.doc2doclending.com/thewholephysician

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance from Pattern, use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime 

The CE experience for this Podcast is powered by CMEfy - click here to reflect and earn credits: https://earnc.me/vY4Kg

Meet Dr. Bradley Block, otolaryngologist, husband, father, and the host of the Physician's Guide to Doctoring Podcast. We interviewed him today to get some of the best pearls he's learned over the years regarding physician wellness. He's gleans from personal experience as well as the phenomenal guests he's interviewed over the past 5 years.

We cover:

• the motivation behind his podcast (hint: "everything we should have been learning when we were memorizing Krebs Cycle")
• getting to the heart of what the patient is really worried about
• how to use humor
• some of his favorite guests so far
• "knowing what's important to you and making sure you're living your life consistent with that"
• the basic secrets to charting
• negative visualization
• a quick and dirty summary of vertigo/dizziness from an ENT's perspective

Resources:

Dr. Block on Twitter, Instagram, & LinkedIn

Physician's Guide to Doctoring Website

Dr. Block's Podcast Episode with Scott Dikkers

Dr. Block's Podcast Episode with BJ Fogg #1

Dr. Block's Podcast Episode with BJ Fogg #2

Dr. Block's Podcast Interview on Discussing Weight

Dr. Block's Podcast Interview with Drs. Jordyn Feingold and Sanj Katyal

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

If you're interested in a personal loan from Doc2Doc Lending, you're welcomed to use our affiliate link: www.doc2doclending.com/thewholephysician

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance from Pattern, you're welcomed to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime 

We are honored to host a special guest who is so brave to advocate for such a special topic.  In this episode, Dr Michelle Chestovich shares her beautiful and heartbreaking story of how she lost her sister to suicide She has become a voice and an advocate for not only awareness but "normalizing" this conversation. She is bringing it out of the darkness that is usually hides it and illuminating it with the amazing tools she learned by certifying as a physician coach. We are so glad she is with us on this episode and join her as allies in the quest to bring physician mental health to the forefront of every wellbeing initiative.

Favorite moments from Dr Chestovich: 

• The work that you are doing is certainly helping people because I think it begins, number one, raising awareness, and number two, normalizing that we too are human and we can have problems with our brain. Just like we can have kidney stones and back problems, our brains can get sick too, and in fact, we're at higher risk for such things.

• And again, this is like my town cry. Not only are we all at risk, but number two, children aren't gonna save us.
• I mean, I get it that it's part of our culture that we so identify with our profession, particularly physicians, but maybe we can realize like we are amazing humans outside of that. When we take that hat off, we're still pretty badass.

Where to find Dr. Chestovich:

Re-Mind Yourself Podcast

#11 Exhaustion

https://www.mamadoclifecoach.com

Instagram: @Mamadoclifecoach

988 - Physician Support Line

Medscape Article - https://www.medscape.com/slideshow/2023-lifestyle-burnout-6016058?icd=login_success_email_match_norm

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

If you're interested in a personal loan from Doc2Doc Lending, you're welcomed to use our affiliate link: www.doc2doclending.com/thewholephysician

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance from Pattern, you're welcomed to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime 

If you are interested in finding out more about Lumos and their new tech to help with night shift, click here! (We are not affiliated - just interested in solving the problem or circadian rhythm disturbances in shift workers.)

The CE experience for this Podcast is powered by CMEfy - click here to reflect and earn credits: https://earnc.me/vY4Kg

Today Kenton Allen, MD, MBA, FASA joins the show to talk about starting Doc2Doc Lending with another co-resident.  After experiencing his own difficulties within the existing banking systems, he helped re-write the script for how doctors can get funding for transitions, side-hustles, fertility journeys, credit card consolidation, and more. He shares:

• why they started their own lending program to fill a void
• the difference between secured and unsecured loans
• the importance of developing positive financial habits and educating yourself
• the importance of understanding your own financial priorities, which can widely vary from person to person
• the importance of being proactive about financial conversations with significant others to prevent significant discontent later
• be choosy with opportunities for side hustles:
  • is it with the right people?
  • is it something you really believe in?
  • is it the right timing?

Mentioned:

The White Coat Investor

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

If you're interested in a personal loan from Doc2Doc Lending, you're welcomed to use our affiliate link: www.doc2doclending.com/thewholephysician

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance from Pattern, you're welcomed to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime 

If you are interested in finding out more about Lumos and their new tech to help with night shift, click here! (We are not affiliated - just interested in solving the problem or circadian rhythm disturbances in shift workers.)

The CE experience for this Podcast is powered by CMEfy - click here to reflect and earn credits: https://earnc.me/vY4Kgo  

Today the three of us sat down to talk about judgment within medicine. This conversation started at a conference we recently attended.  We listened to an amazing lecturer give his account of what keeping empathy looks like and how it helps us care for our patients and others, like our colleagues. It is also a way to take care of ourselves.  We are taught and modeled this idea that what ever service you are on or whatever your role is in taking care of a patient, that if something isn't done or said how you think it should be said, then we immediately judge that person.  We judge management of patients, outcomes of patients, etc.  We also judge the people that are on the same team as us working together to achieve the same goal!  So we introduce another side to consider and ways to keep ourselves in the judgement-free zone.

Favorite moments:

• And so when we judge, we tend to dehumanize each other and we can also do it in our, in our own patient care. But really, we have to normalize this conversation and we have to be able to kind of take a step back and consider that. Hmm. I wonder what's going on today. We talk about in coaching, like maybe try to be a little more curious than furious.
• So this is just a conversation just to start bringing awareness because I would argue it would be a much better culture if we could start being allowed to be vulnerable, if we could stop going instantly to judgment, because we weren't even there in the room 
• Curiosity keeps us open to the possibility that there may be more to the story.
• This is between me and me and how I wanna show up and I wanna show up as the most empathetic, non-judgmental person that I can. Realizing that my brain's default is going to be judging.  

References:

https://sholarichards.com/judging-others/

https://brenebrown.com/book/atlas-of-the-heart/

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance, you're welcomed to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime 

If you are interested in finding out more about Lumos and their new tech to help with night shift, click here!

 If you'd like to earn CME credit for listening to this podcast, follow this link: https://earnc.me/fnAPK9

The CE experience for this Podcast is powered by CMEfy - click here to reflect and earn credits: https://earnc.me/fnAPK9  

In this episode, we continue our interview with Dr. Al'ai Alvarez, a national leader and educator on physician wellness. He's an emergency physician, clinical associate profession of emergency, and the director the Physician Wellness Fellowship at Stanford.

We discuss:

• creating environments where we can talk and acknowledge our lived experiences
• lessons from the Mission Critical Team Institute and the subsequent formation of the High Performance Resuscitation Team
• how to deal with the residue of working in medicine
• relationship-centered care
• gratitude
• focusing on the "goosebumps moments" and being reminded of the good things that we do
• finding your passion
• what is the 1% you can do or stop to make your life better

Wise words from Dr. Alvarez:

"...each one of us has the capacity and the ability to make a choice of what is within our control, what is beyond our control, and what do we want to do with all the things that are facing us. And I hope that people feel that sense of empowerment...[and make] a choice that is alignment with their values. What is truly aligned with myself, my core being, and focus more on that, and do more of that. ... I hope that it'll also inspire people to think about ways to be kinder to yourself. Because then, as much as we try to be kind to everybody else, and do all the good things for other people, we often forget ourselves. And if there's, the one thing that I can leave you, is that all of my work is really rooted in self-compassion. How can we show up for others by taking care of ourselves in a way that is healthy?"

Resources:

Mission Critical Team Institute

Stanford's Physician Wellness Fellowship

The Body Keeps the Score

The Light We Carry by Michelle Obama

Couldn't join us for our FREE CLASS: "Too Much to Do and Not Enough Time," Said Every Doctor Every Day? Check here for the replay.

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance, you're welcomed to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime 

Dr. Alvarez is joining us today to talk about all things wellness in medicine. I met Dr Alvarez at ACOEP Spring Seminar last month. He is an emergency physician and clinical associate professor of Emergency Medicine (EM) at Stanford University. He is the Director of Well-Being and co-chair of the Human Potential Team at Stanford Emergency Medicine. He gave 2 lectures titled, “Beating the Blame” and “Well, for what it’s worth”, both resonated with me due to the work we do at The Whole Physician. Stanford is setting the standard for what meaningful wellness in the workplace looks like when implemented as a whole institution approach.  Everyone at the table and everyone engaged at all levels. There is so much experience Dr Alvarez imparts that we had to do a part 1 AND part 2.  So stay tuned...

Most favorite memories:

• "I think that kind of gives you a sense of how vulnerable I'm willing to be to share about myself because I, this is me, and hopefully it can get as much as you can from that lived experience that I have."
• "Hey, what happens when these are my strengths? And also I'm getting feedback and anonymous evaluations that I'm overwhelming, like these two things. Like how do I coexist? Like how do I have the duality of like, I have a lot of personality, I have a lot of energy as you can tell. And also that's overwhelming to people."
• "Human Potential team which is an awesome team in our department. Our job is to really like understand, think, dissect, and break apart the dilemmas that we encounter in our practice. Not just clinical, but academic space.  And not necessarily find solutions because there are dilemmas there's usually no solutions, but can we be creative enough to address parts of it that will at least make it easy for us to empower us to be better at our work and to find meaning in our work."

Resources: 

Twitter: @alvarezzzy

https://www.lizandmollie.com/book/

"No Hard Feelings"

Couldn't join us for our FREE CLASS how to work in the dumpster fire of healthcare without getting burned? Check here for the replay.

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance, you're welcomed to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime 

If you'd like to earn CME credit for listening to this podcast, follow this link: https://earnc.me/fnAPK9

The CE experience for this Podcast is powered by CMEfy - click here to reflect and earn credits: https://earnc.me/fnAPK9  

Sometimes the smallest changes in habits can lead to huge results. Sometimes trying to change too much all at once backfires. In this episode, we discuss just how life changing it can be to start with smaller steps. 

• Little bursts of exercise can have a bigger impact than you might suspect.
• Starting with just cleaning your sink can lead to an organized house.
• Eating ice cream in a bowl instead of a carton can lead to losing 100 pounds. 

The important thing is just get on the ladder, and that's easier with lower rungs. A ladder with many easily accessed closely-spaced rungs can, after all, lead to the exact same place (and many times easier) as a ladder with widely-spaced, difficult rungs.

Resources:

Atomic Habits by James Clear

Importance of Smaller Steps Video (with picture of the ladders mentioned)

YouTube Video with References Regarding Brief Workouts

Tiny Habits by BJ Fogg

FlyLady

Change Anything by Kerry Patterson

Marie Kondo

Losing 100 Pounds with Corinne Podcast

Couldn't join us for our FREE CLASS how to work in the dumpster fire of healthcare without getting burned? Check here for the replay.

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance, you're welcomed to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime 

If you'd like to earn CME credit for listening to this podcast, follow this link: 

CME for Small Steps to Big Change Podcast

What is the difference between feeling guilty and spiraling into shame? On today's podcast, we dive deeper into these two very poignant emotions. Shame is when the focus is on self, it's not really on a behavior. You actually label yourself as bad or negative or not good enough. Which then makes you feel unworthy of love, belonging, or connection. So it's really not a positive change driver because you really don't feel like enough. Guilt is also a feeling and it's more or less like I did something bad. So it's focused more on a behavior. It's a thought that you made a bad choice and then you get that uncomfortable feeling. Like you made the decision in a way that was against something that we value or we believe or some sort of moral standard that we have for ourselves. And so it actually can be a driver of positive change. During medical school and residency training, the constant perfectionism bred shame and it led to unhealthy coping mechanisms.  We were taught that we do not make mistakes and if you did, you should feel shame.  We shame each other as colleagues when we bring cases in front of peer review or M&M conference. Knowing that we all have been there and the goal is actually to learn and move on, sheds light on the dark places we go when we feel shame.  Empathy is the antidote to shame and guilt.  To build resiliency, we must understand that self-compassion, common humanity and mindfulness are the recipe for healing and overcoming the thoughts that breed these feelings.

Resources:

https://brenebrown.com/books-audio

Atlas of the Heart

Couldn't join us for our FREE CLASS how to work in the dumpster fire of healthcare without getting burned? Check here for the replay.

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance, you're welcomed to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime 

 Do you really know the difference between being a team player… and being codependent?

In this eye-opening and deeply validating episode, the docs take a tender and honest look at codependence in medicine — what it is, where it comes from, how it hides behind “professionalism”… and why so many physicians unknowingly carry these patterns from childhood into their careers.

We explore:

✨ The 5 core symptoms of codependence (originally defined by Pia Mellody)
✨ Why medicine often rewards codependent behavior
✨ How emotional neglect or inconsistency in childhood can shape who we become as physicians
✨ Why boundaries are not selfish (and how to actually hold them)
✨ The real reason we say yes to shifts we don’t want, take on burdens that aren’t ours, and don’t let ourselves pee, eat, or rest
✨ What it means to return to your career on your terms

Plus: what we each wish we’d known earlier, and the freeing realization that you don’t have to be Superwoman to be worthy. You already are.

🔁 Whether you’re a “recovering people-pleaser,” just starting to untangle from burnout, or curious about how codependence shows up in your life — this episode is for you.

💌 Reflection prompt: Where in your life are you over-functioning, denying your needs, or confusing self-sacrifice with self-worth?

🔊 Tune in to learn:

• Why your emotional suppression was adaptive — and how to gently grow past it

• How to recognize when you’re doing other people’s emotional work

• What boundaries really are (and how they can bring you back to life)

• The simple mindset shift that helps you reclaim your energy, agency, and worth

💬 Email us at podcast@thewholephysician.com — we’d love to hear your experience with these patterns.
📲 Follow us on socials @thewholephysician for memes, tools, and behind-the-scenes inspiration.

🌟 And exciting news! We’re back for the third annual Happier Hours at ASEP Scientific Assembly 2025 in Salt Lake City!! Stay tuned for the official launch of our event page. 🎉

Until next time —
You are whole. You are a gift to medicine. The work you do matters.

This week we're sharing a podcast we did onsite at ACOEP23 with EM Over Easy Podcast's Dr. Andy Little. Hope you enjoy!

In this episode we discuss our personal moral injury journeys far before the COVID pandemic. Additionally we cover:

• coaching teaches the same mindset tools commonly used in professional athletics and high level business but glaringly missing in medicine
• perfectionism isn't helpful in the ED
• peer coaching can fill a critical void for physician support
• the importance of recognizing your value
• the importance of being realistic about what is and what isn't in your control
• so many times the thing you're beating yourself up about isn't your fault
• don't downplay the good that you're doing
• you're worthy inherently, and deserving of wellbeing - never listen to the shame gremlins
• your coaching journey is fully dependent on the results you want for yourself and is considered skill building rather than mental health support
• there is tremendous value, as team leaders, for EM docs to have coaching support to function optimally over the span of their careers

Quotable: "...the biggest piece is knowing my own value and knowing what is in my control and what is not in my control, and always having my own back. I always know that I show up and do the very best job I can do. And I will never, ever punish myself for thing that happen that are out of my control. And if I make a mistake, I'll say, okay, how can I avoid that in the future? But I am never going to rail on myself ever again." - Laura Cazier, MD

EM Over Easy Links:

Twitter

Podcast Website

References:

Katrina Ubell's Podcast

The Star Thrower

Couldn't join us for our FREE CLASS how to work in the dumpster fire of healthcare without getting burned? Check here for the replay.

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance, you're welcomed to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime 

This episode we dive into the topic of boundaries...finally!  We have a fun and candid conversation about what boundaries are and what it means to have boundaries and where we use the boundaries to serve us in our lives. 

A - Boundaries are like property lines. It's where your property ends and someone else's property begins. So be careful who you open the gate to and allow into your yard.

K - when you invest in not only setting clear boundaries with people, these are actually relationships that you care very deeply for and that you wanna maintain for a long time. So that's why it is picking your relationship wisely. You have limited energy, you know which relationships are the most important to you, and these are actually things that you wanna apply to relationships that you actually want to hold very dear to you and for a long period of time.

L - And so our job really is not to control our kids. It's to help them get control of themselves. And to teach them self-control.  That's our job because ultimately we can't control them. The more we try to control them, the more we will drive them away from us.

Resources: 

Dr Caroline Leaf and Dr Henry cloud on "Cleaning up your Mental Mess"  podcast episode, “How to Know When & How to Say NO". January 15, 2020

Dr Henry Cloud: www.boundaries.me

Dr Caroline Leaf: www.drleaf.com

"Good Boundaries and Good Byes" book by Lysa TerKeurst

Couldn't join us for our FREE CLASS how to work in the dumpster fire of healthcare without getting burned? Check here for the replay.

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance, you're welcomed to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime 

The CE experience for this Podcast is powered by CMEfy - click here to reflect and earn credits: https://earnc.me/JyxXTI  

This experience is powered by CMEfy – an AI-powered platform that directs learners along a pathway to capture reflections at the point of inspiration, point of care. Clinicians may earn CME/CE credit via ReflectCE, the accredited activity portal. Learn more at about.cmefy.com/cme-info

In this episode we talk about what happens during one of our private coaching sessions. We realize most of our listeners have never personally experienced being coached by a life/wellness coach and may come with some assumptions about what goes on.

First, coaching is client directed. You pick what you want to work on. 

Next, we listen...without judgement. We purely help bring to the surface what thoughts your brain is offering up. And you get to decide if they are getting you to where you want to go or not.

Then, if your thoughts aren't serving you, we help you create a game plan to change that. Coaching believes that you are capable and that the answers that best serve your life are within you. We just act as a guide.

Consider that it is estimated each person has ~60,000 thoughts daily, the majority are automatic without awareness. Your thoughts create your feelings, and your feelings drive actions that give you the results in your life. If you aren't where you want to be, a fantastic exercise is to go upstream to examine your thoughts. A coach helps you create the best version of your life.

Information from Lumos about the Night Shift/Circadian Rhythm Study:

"If you are currently working night shifts and have poor sleep because of the night shifts, we have a new product testing opportunity for you. Lumos is a Silicon Valley-based startup company developing a product with technology from Stanford that aims to ease the transition from day shift to night shift work rotations.

We are inviting individuals who currently work regular night shift rotations to test out our newest prototype device. The study is free to participate. All we ask is that you tell us about your experience using our product, which will come in the form of surveys, quick cognitive tasks, sleep tracking devices, wearable light sensor devices, and using our iOS compatible app.

    Are you eligible?
    1. Currently working regular night shift rotations
    2. Access to iOS device
    3. 18-65 years of age

For more information, contact us at study@lumos.tech, or fill out our quick interest form (https://forms.gle/zgJTMQhNdL5JYwdw8). Thank you!"

*Couldn't join us for our FREE CLASS how to work in the dumpster fire of healthcare without getting burned? Check here for the replay.

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance, you're welcomed to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime

To earn CME creditThe CE experience for this Podcast is powered by CMEfy - click here to reflect and earn credits: https://earnc.me/vhSwYO

This experience is powered by CMEfy – an AI-powered platform that directs learners along a pathway to capture reflections at the point of inspiration, point of care. Clinicians may earn CME/CE credit via ReflectCE, the accredited activity portal. Learn more at about.cmefy.com/cme-info

We continue our quest to improve our emotional granularity by discussing the emotions, fear, anxiety and dread. These are all emotions we as doctors experience at any time during our day, week or even moment. We put forth the best effort to take care of the patients that are put in our hands. But we know that inevitably things don't go the way we thought and we can easily allow fear, anxiety and dread dictate how we view the entire situation.  Brene Brown's book, Atlas of the Heart, dissects fear, anxiety and dread and helps give us perspective on how we can actually make this energy work for us.  We can be comfortable engaging these signals and listening to what they are trying to tell us. Some of our favorite moments:

• So we know emotions and feelings are actually just the vibrations in the body. So it's manifesting in the body somewhere. So we have to drop out of our brain. You know, all of us are supratentorial. As physicians, as professionals, we love to stay up here. It's safe, but we actually gotta drop down. We gotta get under the jaw, under the neck and get down in our body and how it feels.
• Brene Brown says there's trait and there's state. And so a trait is like something that is part of an individual's personality. A state, on the other hand, is a temporary condition that someone is experiencing for a short period of time.
• When we're anxious, we often choose one of two paths and she talks about worry and avoidance. And really neither of these is very useful. We might believe it's a helpful coping mechanism. It's not. We might believe it's uncontrollable, and so we don't even try to stop it. We might try to suppress worry instead of allowing it and allowing it to pass through, and then it gets bigger.
• Avoidance is not showing up and often spinning a lot of energies zigzagging around and away from the thing that already feels like it's consuming us.
• Dread is specifically when a negative event is very likely to occur. Like, regardless of what happens there's a high likelihood that something negative is going to happen. And with dread, the magnitude increases as the event draws nearer.
• Fear is a short-lasting, negative feeling, high alert emotions. 
• Fear, though, is in response to a perceived threat. And like anxiety, it can also be a state or trait. We would ask is this useful or not? But you can consider yourself a fearful person or just have fear in the moment. Whereas this is an important difference, anxiety and dread are about the future. It's that future tripping. Fear is in the now, and it can be so rapid fire that it's almost automatic.

References:

https://brenebrown.com/book/atlas-of-the-heart/

https://brenebrown.com/hubs/atlas-hub/

*Couldn't join us for our FREE CLASS how to work in the dumpster fire of healthcare without getting burned? Check out the replay.

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance, you're welcomed to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime

In this episode we talk about the various uses of the equation attributed to Psychologist Kristin Neff.

Pain x Resistance = Suffering

Part of being a human on earth is enduring some painful situations and experiencing discomfort. But it's shocking how much additional suffering we create by trying to fight reality. It's also good energy wasted, energy that could be used on thing within your control. We discuss examples, but at work and outside of work, where applying this equation helped our lives immensely.  And it's your choice. If you like the results you're getting, keep doing what you're doing.

• "It's never the circumstance that is the problem. It's what we think about the circumstance that creates the results for our lives."
• "So just accepting people the way they are is a big step in the direction of avoiding this unnecessary suffering."
• Extra attention should be given when you catch yourself saying “it should be,” or “I wish that,” or “if only.”
• Resisting reality can negatively affect how you're showing up in human interactions.
• Having "prescriptions" for how other adults should act is disempowering. But that's different from having healthy boundaries.
• Shaming yourself for things in the past can work against you.
• When you're judging another's behavior - it's very easy to fall into the same behavior yourself in response.

Resources:

Kristin Neff LinkTree

*Couldn't join us for our FREE CLASS how to work in the dumpster fire of healthcare without getting burned? Check out the replay.

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance, you're welcomed to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime

This special edition is a conversation with software developer, life coach and addiction survivor, Elyse Segebart.  She bravely discusses her journey being introduced to drugs and her 13 year struggle with addiction. She has emerged in a career in software development and mentors a special population of people trying to get into software development, their common theme is they come from a disadvantaged background like addiction or incarceration.  Along with her certification as a life coach, she is using her trade to help these types of people get jobs in technology. She was introduced to drugs at the young age of 13 by a friend's family and that was the beginning of many years of active use, rehabilitation, recovery and back to using.  Each cycle she said there was never a time that she couldn't get off drugs or be sober, but coping with life and going back to the unhealthy relationships is what repeatedly led her in the constant cycle of drug abuse.

Some of our favorite moments:

• "the hardest part about addiction is that nobody wants to quit.  And they always have to hit this point where they are done with it. Like they either get the resolve and wanna quit and do it, or they have to hit rock bottom enough to where they're like, I'm tired of this, I'm tired of losing to this."

• "meth releases 40,000 times the amount of dopamine in your brain. And that's not a natural thing that you should ever experience. And so, as you know, like dopamine teaches us where there's something important to be had or seen or look at again. And so when you have that amount of dopamine in it, like it seems very important that you should do this again. Like super important and you will do whatever to do it."
• "I think really what made the difference for me was the mental health therapy and going to it, like sticking with it. I had done so many treatments, inpatient, outpatient, and I think mental health therapy really is the only way that's going to keep you to stay off of them.  And it just needed a longer form of support, you know, like that that therapy is what was needed. I think it should be a mandatory requirement for anyone who is being rehabilitated, that they have mandatory mental health therapy and not just drug treatment. Drug treatment is, you hear it once, you know it forever, you don't need to hear it again. I needed to understand like why I'm doing the things I'm doing or  build the skills to rewire certain patterns.  And I needed help to manage my ADHD and all the impulsive behaviors that I had."

To contact Elyse:

https://elysesegebart.com

@elysethelifecoach (Instagram)

The CE experience for this Podcast is powered by CMEfy - click here to reflect and earn credits: https://earnc.me/C06FKE This experience is powered by CMEfy – an AI-powered platform that directs learners along a pathway to capture reflections at the point of inspiration, point of care. Clinicians may earn CME/CE credit via ReflectCE, the accredited activity portal. Learn more at about.cmefy.com/cme-info

**Did you miss our FREE CLASS on how to work in the dumpster fire of healthcare without getting burned? Replay is available here.

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and online courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance, you're welcome to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime

In the episode we discuss the essay "The Star Thrower" from Loren's Book The Unexpected Universe. It is a beautiful piece about making a difference even when it seems futile. And for many of us, working in healthcare can seem futile at times. But Eiseley's essay describes the beauty, the strength, and the importance of being the anti-chaos in a world of chaos. 

Colin Beavan, PhD has some suggestions for when things seem futile. Here are a few of our favorites:

• realize there is a difference between the world not changing fast enough and you being useless
• instead of focusing on how bad the problem is, focus on how amazing your allies are
• realize that anger, fear, frustration will burn you out
• take care of yourself
• count your blessings
• create boundaries
• accept that it is appropriate to feel sad and frustrated

His biggest takeaway is to limit your concern to your sphere of influence.

And remember you're not seeing the full results of your work. Studies show that a single act of kindness can affect up to 125 people. That's a difference that you may never see but exists nonetheless.

What the world needs is not for you to burn out, but to pour from a cup that is overfilled. There will always be more "starfish" but there is only one you.

If you missed our on how to work in the dumpster fire of healthcare without getting burned. You can access the replay here.

Referenced articles/songs/resources:

 https://www.amazon.com/Unexpected-Universe-Loren-Eiseley/dp/0156928507

 https://colinbeavan.com/ten-ways-overcome-futility-life-climate-anything-else/

 https://colinbeavan.com/feel-like-make-difference/

 https://www.pnas.org/doi/full/10.1073/pnas.0913149107 

 https://drdavidhamilton.com/if-you-ever-feel-like-you-dont-make-a-difference/ 

Jason Mraz "Look for the Good"

The Good News Network

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and CME courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

If you'd like something you can use today, download our free Top 10 Mindset Hacks for Doctors here. 

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance, you're welcome to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime

Introducing Dr Tonya Caylor, family medicine doc, who relocated to Alaska from Florida. She describes her journey from  academic medicine to independent practice and the recovery from burnout.  Her passion is now to help residents and faculty with mindset training to equip them with the tools they need for longevity in their career in medicine. In our conversation, Dr Caylor gives examples of common things residents struggle with and what she has taught through private and group coaching to get them to shift into a perspective that works for them! 

Our favorite moments: 

• "The one thing that I think was surprising to me, number one, is at the time I was unaware that that was a term or a phenomenon that happens. And it was so insidious, like I thought, in fact, I remember saying at a faculty retreat, like, I feel completely balanced in life. I remember pronouncing this. You know, the joy that I was experiencing in my role. And then it was a few years later, but I was in deep by the time I figured it out."
• "I had become like an approval addict. I was so over reliant on external validation that when all of my colleagues were super busy and not having the time to, you know, gimme a pat on the back. Really got in my head."
• "you wanna like work within the system and see if you can make it work for you. But there's a huge difference when a system is working for you rather than against you. And I think we're starting to see institutions recognize that now." 

• "And if they think about the time, blood, sweat, tears, money that went into it, like realizing that coaching could give some tangible traction for them to re-discover the joy in their chosen career, that's how I ended up starting my coaching business."

   Contact Dr Caylor:

• https://www.joyinfamilymedicine.com/

• joyinfamilymedicine@gmail.com 

Did you miss our FREE CLASS all about frustrations with working in the healthcare system called: What's the ICD-10 Code for Injuries Sustained in a Dumpster Fire? Catch the replay here.

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and CME courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

If you'd like something you can use today, download our free Top 10 Mindset Hacks for Doctors here. 

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance, you're welcome to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime

Today we discuss some tips from Rick Hanson, PhD's book Just One Thing: Developing a Buddha Brain One Simple Practice at a Time for how to change your brain for better or worse.

Some highlights:

• We are not our brains - we are the observers.
• We can decide what is and isn't serving us and intentionally change our brains through neuroplasticity.
• There are physiologic changes associated with neuroplasticity.
• "Neurons that fire together, wire together." - Donald Hebb, PhD
• Two important practices:
  • Be For Yourself - treat yourself as well as you'd treat a best friend or child. Choose things that are in your best interest. Don't diminish your own accomplishments.
  • Taking In The Good - knowing that our brains have a negativity bias, spend time in and relish the good on purpose.

Resources: 

Dr. Hanson's Book "Just One Thing"

Katrina Ubell, MD's podcast episode with Dr. Hanson

Did you miss our FREE CLASS all about frustrations with working in the healthcare system called: What's the ICD-10 Code for Injuries Sustained in a Dumpster Fire? Catch the replay here.

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and CME courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

If you'd like something you can use today, download our free Top 10 Mindset Hacks for Doctors here. 

We also have a FREE CLASS replay all about Buffering. It's called: Overcoming Over-(whatever)ing. We can email it to you instantly. Here's the link.

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance, you're welcome to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime

Dr. Heather Awad joined us to talk about buffering. She's a family physician in Minnesota, a weight loss coach at Vibrant MD, and has her own podcast called Vibrant MD Podcast. She is an expert at helping her clients stop buffering with overeating and joins us today to give some of her secrets. She coaches professional women over 50 to achieve permanent weight loss and talks a lot about buffering. Buffering is using anything to numb out or distract from feeling negative emotions. For example, overeating, overspending, over-scrolling, over-drinking are all ways people find to distract them from feeling things that may be uncomfortable. She says, "We look at all that kind of stuff, the ways that we use food that doesn't serve us and helps us avoid our feelings. When we use food to avoid our feelings, we're avoiding the full richness of our life, by trying to step out of experiences, by using food to do that".

Where to find Dr Awad:

www.vibrant-md.com

Vibrant-MD.com/tips

Podcast: https://www.vibrant-md.com/podcasts/vibrant-md-podcast

We have a FREE CLASS replay all about Buffering. We'll email it to you instantly by clicking the link.

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and CME courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

If you'd like something you can use today, download our free Top 10 Mindset Hacks for Doctors here. 

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance, you're welcome to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime

Ready to transform your post-shift sleep game? Kendra drops knowledge bombs about why working nights feels crazy (spoiler: you're not crazy, it's just science!).

• 40% of shift workers have Shift Work Sleep Disorder - you're not alone!
• Sleep deprivation = legally drunk levels of impairment
• Short sleep (less than 6 hours) might be shortening your life!

• Trouble falling asleep after shift (body exhausted, brain WIDE awake)
• Brain fog and mood swings
• Headaches and low energy coffee can't fix

🌡️ Temperature: Keep it cool (around 67°F)
🌑 Darkness: Blackout everything - even that Roomba light!
🔇 Sound: White noise, brown noise - find your jam!

• Forward rotating shifts work better
• At least 48 hours off after night shifts
• Cut caffeine 6+ hours before bedtime
• Strategic napping: 30 minutes OR full 90-minute cycles
• No phones in bed!

Pick ONE thing to start with:

• Cover annoying alarm clock lights
• Push bedtime 30 minutes earlier
• Invest in blackout curtains
• Stop scrolling in bed

Set boundaries with your household - communicate your sleep schedule and permission granted to prioritize your rest!

Never waking up feeling rested? Always exhausted? See a sleep specialist! Resources: CBTI apps, pharmacological support when needed.

Email us: podcast@thewholephysician.com

Remember: You are whole. You are a gift to medicine. The work you do matters! 💙

In the episode, we discuss "The Giving Tree" by Shel Silverstein. It is a beloved book by many, but it is problematic to say the least. And altruistic healthcare workers using this as a model of self-sacrifice may want to reconsider.

Highlights:

• Self sacrifice is not sustainable, isn't healthy and can breed selfishness, narcissism and codependency.
• Those who neglect themselves at the expense of others suffer the consequences: anxiety, depression, and less efficacy.
• True generosity begets more generosity. 
• The most successful givers ALSO score highly in self concern.
• Self sacrifice doesn't model loving boundaries.
• Generosity and self sacrifice are not the same thing.
• Self sacrifice can create a mutually detrimental relationship for all.
• Healthy, loving boundaries can result in much better outcomes.

Resources:

https://www.shelsilverstein.com/9780060256654/the-giving-tree/

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/15/parenting/we-need-to-talk-about-the-giving-tree.html

http://www.curiata.com/content/3120.php

https://www.christopherroosen.com/blog/2021/5/29/why-i-cant-stand-the-giving-tree-by-shel-silverstein-a-picture-of-a-destructive-and-selfish-relationships

https://www.topherpayne.com/giving-tree

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and CME courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

If you'd like something you can use today, download our free Top 10 Mindset Hacks for Doctors here. 

Introducing Dr. Michael Hersh, who was in the same coaching class as Amanda and Laura, and has pioneered the male coaching space.  He is a full time practicing gastroenterologist in Chicago who came to coaching to address some of his frustrations with work. Little did he know, the work he did in the professional space created many improvements in his personal and family life.  He has amazing insight from the male perspective and all the other skeptics out there!  You can find him at betterphyscianlife.com.

Great moments with Dr Hersh:

• but something just still didn't seem right. It was, it was almost like, you know, it was fine. But it just seemed like maybe something was missing. There should be more. And I kept seeing these ads for physician coaching. Super skeptical guy.  But I was like, you know what? I'm just gonna give this a try. This seems like something. I could try, I don't know....and then he asked me this one question that really changed everything for me. And that was, “well, if you don't do this, then what changes?” And man, that question, so I did it and it just, it literally changed everything.
• I think one of the biggest hurdles that we kind of tackle in physician coaching is processing feelings, right?...I didn't even realize I had that many feelings. I was frustrated, angry, worried, and that was about it. And then during one of my coaching sessions, one of my female coaches pulled out a feeling wheel. And I don't know if your listeners know what a feeling wheel is, but this was an overwhelming experience just seeing this thing and all of the potential feelings that can exist. And so I think for men learning to process emotions and feelings is really vital work and it's something that we do a lot of in coaching.
• I think that female physicians have kind of been the pioneers in the physician coaching space. They have been the ones that have really gone out there, you know, and in some ways, and again, I hate to be, you know, stereotypical and like gender focused, but you know, women tend to be the caretakers. And so right now the female physician coaches are caretaking for our entire profession.
• I think the men, I think all physicians are skeptical, but I think the men tend to be a little bit more skeptical of this work out of the gate. I know I was, but once, once they experience it and they see the power of it, very quick adopters.
• And I would say the thing I didn't realize was I thought saying yes, was just saying yes. And I didn't think about the no that I was saying on the other side of that yes. So when you say yes to one opportunity, you're saying no to something else. And for me, the people I was saying no to was my family...

  So rather than thinking about a boundary as a negative thing, like, “oh, I'm saying no and that person's gonna not be happy with me because I've said no to them”. Remember the people that you're showing up for in that no, most notably yourself. 

Where to find Dr Hersh:

https://www.betterphysicianlife.com/

"Doctors Living Deliberately" Podcast with Dr Arpita DePalma (also on YouTube)

Other resources: 

Feelings Wheel

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and CME courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

If you'd like something you can use today, download our free Top 10 Mindset Hacks for Doctors here. 

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance, you're welcome to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime

Today, we continue improving our emotional granularity (or ability to correctly identify emotions) using Brene Brown's book "Atlas of the Heart." And, since emotions aren't inherently "good or bad," we take a look at what the feelings can be telling us. The focus of todays episode is stress vs overwhelm. 

Using Brene's example from working in a restaurant, stress is when you're "in the weeds." It's when your environmental requirements are felt to be beyond your ability to cope well. And it's all your perception. The solution can rely on thinking still: changing perception and/or delegating tasks.

Overwhelm is when "you're blown." It's when you are at the point when you're not thinking well and unable to come up with a solid plan. It's when you're feeling unable to function. The solution here, from Jon Kabat Zinn, is some non-doing time- letting the brain rest or engage in play for a period of time. And then, after the disconnect, it's go time.

Best Health has a useful process:

• Capture it - write down every task you can think of.
• Chunk it - group your tasks and to-dos into larger chunks (helps you see more clearly).
• Choose it - start with activities that strengthen you, that you’re looking forward to. Just pick SOMETHING to start with.
• Take action - Just begin. Action is the antidote to overwhelm. Just starting can reduce anxiety.
• Focus - stay in the moment rather than getting swept up in the rest.

Resources:

https://brenebrown.com/book/atlas-of-the-heart/

https://www.besthealthmag.ca/article/5-ways-to-stop-feeling-overwhelmed/

If you want to work with us, visit our website: www.thewholephysician.com. We have private coaching and CME courses available. Additionally, we're happy to lecture for your institution. Sign up for our Weekly Well Check by clicking the link. The Weekly Well Check is your weekly dose of encouragement and your only access to secret insider sales on our products.

If you'd like something you can use today, download our free Top 10 Mindset Hacks for Doctors here. 

For a free quote on Own-Occupation Insurance, you're welcome to use our affiliate link: patternlife.com/drivetime