Complex Sex is a podcast dedicated to exploring the multifaceted world of sex, marriage, relationships, and therapy. Hosted by Dr. Mallorie Sorce, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and Certified Emotionally Focused Therapist (EFT), each episode delves into intimate topics with empathy and expertise. As the owner of Healing Hearts Counseling in Murray, Utah, Dr. Sorce brings over seven years of experience in helping couples and individuals strengthen their relationships.
In Complex Sex, listeners can expect insightful discussions on:
• Navigating sexual health and intimacy
• Enhancing marital and relationship dynamics
• Understanding therapeutic approaches to common challenges
• Exploring diverse perspectives from guest experts, including sex coaches and therapists
Join Dr. Sorce and her guests as they unravel the complexities of human connection, offering practical advice and heartfelt conversations to enrich your personal journey.
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Episode 9: Fantasy, Identity & Desire — How Orientation, Gender, and Shame Shape Our Erotic Worlds
Season 1 — Pornography in Context
Why do different people fantasize about different things? Why do some fantasies feel empowering while others feel confusing or taboo? And how do gender, sexual orientation, culture, and shame shape the erotic stories we tell ourselves?
In this solo follow-up to her conversation with Dr. Claire Malantine, Dr. Mallorie Sorce takes listeners deeper into the psychology of sexual fantasy, exploring how identity, biology, attachment, culture, and porn all interact to shape our inner erotic lives. This episode unpacks the myths about “male vs. female fantasies,” breaks down key research findings, and offers a compassionate framework for understanding why your fantasies look the way they do—without shame, fear, or judgment.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
Why gendered fantasy stereotypes are outdated and oversimplified
What heterosexual, bisexual, gay, and queer individuals actually report fantasizing about
Why sexual minorities often have broader, more varied fantasy landscapes
How cultural norms shape what we believe we’re “allowed” to want
Why taboo fantasies (like consensual non-consent) are more common than people think
How porn introduces, reinforces, or expands fantasy themes
The reinforcement effect: why repeated media exposure shapes desire
Why arousal ≠ endorsement, and why fantasy ≠ intention
How to make sense of fantasies that feel confusing or clash with your values
The three types of sexual shame and how they distort fantasy
Why shame can both suppress and intensify desire
The neuroscience of fantasy: dopamine, novelty, and emotional regulation
How attachment style and sexual self-image show up in your erotic imagination
Why desire discrepancy in couples is normal—and how fantasy can be a bridge
How to talk about fantasies with a partner without pressure, panic, or miscommunication
When to share a fantasy, when not to, and how to do it safely
Why fantasy is a tool for healing, growth, and emotional connection
Perfect for listeners who:
Feel confused, curious, or ashamed about their fantasies
Want to understand how porn shapes (but doesn’t define) their erotic imagination
Grew up in religious or purity-based environments
Navigate taboo, intense, or identity-exploring fantasies
Want to deepen erotic connection in their relationships
Are learning to talk about desire with a partner
Want a research-informed, shame-free understanding of fantasy
Mallorie offers warmth, honesty, and clinical clarity as she guides listeners through one of the most misunderstood aspects of sexuality. Her message is simple and empowering:
Your fantasies don’t define you. They illuminate you.
They show what you long for, what you fear, what you’re healing from, and where you want to grow.
Up next: Fantasy, porn, and erotic ethics — how to explore desire with safety, consent, and integrity.
Episode 8: The Psychology of Fantasy — Attachment, Desire & the Meaning Behind What Turns Us On
Season 1 — Pornography in Context
Why do certain sexual fantasies stick with us? Why do some feel confusing, shameful, or “too much”? And what do our erotic imaginations reveal about belonging, attachment, and emotional needs?
In this intimate and deeply validating episode of Complex Sex, Dr. Mallorie Sorce sits down with her longtime mentor and supervisor, Dr. Claire Malantine, an internationally recognized therapist, speaker, and award-winning author. Together, they unravel the psychology, neuroscience, and relational meaning behind sexual fantasy, desire, and the porn we’re drawn to.
This episode is a compassionate exploration of why fantasy is a normal, healthy part of human sexuality—and how understanding it can create safety, connection, and better communication in relationships.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
Why fantasy ≠ intent — and why most fantasies are never meant to be acted out
How attachment needs like belonging, being wanted, and feeling loved shape erotic imagination
Why partners can feel threatened by fantasy or porn—and the attachment injuries underneath
How shame, secrecy, and moral messages distort fantasy and desire
Why viewing fantasy through behavior-only “addiction” models misses the deeper emotional story
How to talk about porn and fantasy in relationships without fear, jealousy, or shutdown
Why exploration and curiosity strengthen intimacy, safety, and erotic flexibility
How consensual non-consent, BDSM, voyeurism, exhibitionism, and taboo fantasies function psychologically
Episode 7: How Do You Treat OCSB? Inside the Most Debated Models in Sex Therapy
Season 1 — Pornography in Context
What actually helps when someone feels their porn use is compulsive, distressing, or out of alignment with their values? And why is treating “porn addiction” more complicated than most people think?
In this solo deep-dive episode of Complex Sex, Dr. Mallorie Sorce unpacks the most widely used — and most controversial — treatment models for Out of Control Sexual Behavior (OCSB) and problematic pornography use. Instead of moralizing or fear-based narratives, Mallorie brings research, nuance, and real clinical clarity to a topic that affects countless individuals and couples.
From CBT to 12-step programs to trauma-informed somatic work, she explores what the evidence actually says, where the gaps are, and why no single model fits every person or every relationship.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
What OCSB is — and what it isn’t
Why “porn addiction” isn’t an official diagnosis
What the latest research reveals about compulsive sexual behavior
Why CBT currently has the strongest evidence — and its major limitations
How affect regulation, attachment injuries, and trauma shape porn use
Why secrecy, shame, and moral distress mimic addiction patterns
What mindfulness, somatic therapy, and neurobiology offer that CBT doesn’t
How EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy) helps couples rebuild trust and safety
Why emotionally attuned treatment reduces compulsivity more effectively than shame
How addiction models like 12-step and Carnes’ 30-task model help some clients — and harm others
Pornography in Context - Out of Control Sexual Behavior - Part 2 | Natasha Helfer
Episode 6: Gender, Shame & the Double Standard — Why Porn Impacts Women and Men Differently
Season 1 — Pornography in Context
Why do women often feel more shame around porn use than men? Why do men get labeled dysfunctional while women get labeled “betrayed”? And why are both messages rooted in cultural scripts—not science?
In this follow-up episode of Complex Sex, Dr. Mallorie Sorce and AASECT-certified sex therapist Natasha Helfer dive deeper into Out of Control Sexual Behavior (OCSB)—this time exploring gender differences, research gaps, moral incongruence, and the way religious and conservative cultures shape the meaning we attach to porn.
This is an unfiltered conversation about double standards, sexual shame, erotic autonomy, and how patriarchal conditioning harms everyone—especially women trying to claim their pleasure.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
Why OCSB is a rare condition—and why most distress around porn has nothing to do with pathology
How cultural narratives push women to see men’s sexual behavior as betrayal but ignore their own erotic needs
Why women’s porn use is under-reported—and often shamed into silence
How gendered scripts shape who’s “allowed” eroticism and who’s punished for it
Why heterosexual men rarely feel threatened by women’s porn use (and what that reveals)
How purity culture, modesty teachings, and “good girl” conditioning disconnect women from their erotic selves
What porn distress actually signals in a relationship—and what it doesn’t
Why monitoring your partner’s sexual behavior destroys intimacy instead of protecting it
Pornography in Context - Out of Control Sexual Behavior - Part 1 | Natasha Helfer
Episode 5: Is It Porn Addiction or Something Else? Understanding OCSB, Shame & Sexual Anxiety
Season 1 — Pornography in Context
Why do so many people—especially in Utah and conservative religious cultures—believe they’re “addicted” to pornography? And what if the distress isn’t coming from the behavior itself, but from shame, moral conflict, and fear?
In this essential episode of Complex Sex, Dr. Mallorie Sorce welcomes Natasha Helfer, an AASECT-certified sex therapist and leading expert in religious trauma and sexual shame, for a deep and clarifying conversation about Out of Control Sexual Behavior (OCSB), compulsive sexual behavior, and the myth of porn “addiction.”
Together, they unpack the cultural, emotional, and relational forces that shape how people interpret their porn use—and why the addiction label often causes more harm than healing.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
Why porn addiction is not an official diagnosis—and what the science actually says
The difference between OCSB, compulsive behavior, and moral distress
How religious messaging, purity culture, and fear-based education distort sexuality
Why many people believe they’re “addicted” even with minimal or healthy porn use
How shame amplifies compulsive patterns more than the content itself
Why couples get stuck in painful cycles around porn, secrecy, and resentment
The role cultural narratives play in shaping sexual expectations and conflict
What truly constitutes a problematic relationship with porn—and what doesn’t
How to talk with your partner about porn, boundaries, and desire without spiraling
Pornography in Context - Trauma Mastery | Dr. Holly Richmond
Episode 4: Trauma, Fantasy & Porn — Understanding the Meaning Beneath Desire
Season 1 — Pornography in Context
Why are some people drawn to intense fantasies, extreme porn, or BDSM — especially after trauma? And how do we know when these desires are healing, harmful, or simply misunderstood?
In this deeply insightful episode of Complex Sex, Dr. Mallorie Sorce sits down with Dr. Holly Richmond, one of the nation’s leading experts in sexual trauma, somatic psychology, and erotic recovery. Together, they unpack how unresolved trauma can shape our sexual desires, fantasies, and porn use — and why the meaning beneath the fantasy matters far more than the content itself.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
What trauma mastery is, and why people may unconsciously revisit themes from past trauma in porn or fantasy
How repetition compulsion and nervous system responses explain patterns that feel confusing or shameful
Why intense or taboo porn doesn’t necessarily signal pathology — it often signals a deeper emotional need
How compulsive porn use differs from intentional erotic exploration
The difference between numbing, self-soothing, and seeking intensity to “feel alive”
How sexual behavior can regulate the nervous system — both up and down
Why BDSM can be a profoundly healing space for survivors when practiced with consent, negotiation, and structure
Understanding consensual non-consent, “forced seduction fantasies,” and why they’re far more common (and normal) than people realize
How somatic therapy helps survivors reconnect with choice, agency, and eroticism
Ways therapists can help clients shift from shame to empowerment
When porn use becomes distressing — and what warning signs actually matter
Pornography in Context - History of Pornography - Part 2
Episode 3: From Victorian Censorship to Digital Porn — How Power Shapes Pleasure
Season 1 — Pornography in Context
Why did Victorian England panic over erotic novels? How did early photography, stag films, Playboy, VHS, the feminist sex wars, and the internet transform pornography forever? And what does AI-generated porn mean for the future of consent and desire?
In this sweeping episode of Complex Sex, Dr. Mallorie Sorce traces pornography’s evolution from the 1700s to today — revealing how sex, censorship, technology, and power have been intertwined for centuries. This is not just a history lesson. It’s a look at how culture decides what counts as “obscene,” who is allowed to express desire, and who gets punished for it.
In this episode, you’ll learn about:
Fanny Hill (1748) — the erotic novel so bold it reshaped the definition of obscenity
The Obscene Publications Act of 1857 and why Victorian moral panic silenced women, queer people, and working-class sexuality
The secret vaults (literally) where museums hid erotic artifacts from Pompeii
How Enlightenment philosophy separated “art” from “desire,” shaping modern porn stigma
Erotic photography, French postcards, and the rise of underground sexual expression
How Playboy rebranded porn as lifestyle — and the contradictions beneath the glamour
The “Golden Age of Porn,” mainstream movie theaters, and the arrival of Deep Throat
VHS culture, the porn boom, and the feminist sex wars that split the movement
Queer erotica as a hidden archive of LGBTQ+ history, identity, and resistance
How the internet revolutionized porn through accessibility, anonymity, and algorithms
The creator economy: OnlyFans, user-generated porn, empowerment, labor, and exploitation
Pornography in Context - History of Pornography - Part 1
Episode 2: The Ancient Roots of Erotica — From Cave Art to Sacred Sex
Season 1 — Pornography in Context
What if pornography isn’t a modern invention at all, but a reflection of something humans have always created, celebrated, and wrestled with?
In this sweeping, cinematic episode of Complex Sex, Dr. Mallorie Sorce takes listeners on a journey through 33,000 years of erotic history — from prehistoric cave carvings to phallic Roman street signs, from sacred Egyptian fertility gods to medieval penis trees drawn by monks. This episode uncovers the surprising, provocative, and deeply human ways sexuality has always been expressed.
In this episode, you’ll explore:
Erotic carvings inside Chauvet Cave, some of the oldest sexual art in human history
How ancient Egypt saw sexuality as divine, spiritual, and life-giving
Mesopotamian, Indian, Islamic, Chinese, and Japanese erotic traditions that shaped global views of sex
Pompeii’s explicit brothels, frescoes, and phallic street markers — and why Victorians locked them in a “Secret Cabinet”
How early erotica blended spirituality, humor, medicine, political power, and social hierarchy
The origins of fetishism, queer desire, and erotic power dynamics across cultures
Why medieval Europe wasn’t prudish at all — monks drew dicks in margins, saints wrote erotic poetry, and churches displayed vulva carvings
How ancient and medieval cultures honored sexuality long before it was moralized, censored, or hidden
This episode is perfect for listeners who want to understand:
Episode 1: Pornography, Fear, and the Beginning of Healing
Season 1 — Pornography in Context
What happens when everything you were taught about pornography creates fear, anxiety, and shame—and how do you begin to heal?
In this raw and revealing first episode of Complex Sex, Dr. Mallorie Sorce shares the personal story that shaped her clinical work, her marriage, and her doctoral research on sex and pornography. Raised in a home where porn was seen as dangerous and destructive, Mallorie carried those beliefs into adulthood—only to face betrayal, confusion, and emotional turmoil in her early relationships.
This episode dives into the heart of that journey and lays the foundation for an honest, research-based season exploring the truth about pornography, desire, and modern intimacy.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
How childhood messages about sex and porn shape adult relationships
Why “porn fear” and secrecy are so common—and how they impact intimacy
What really happened when Mallorie discovered her partner’s hidden porn use
How they rebuilt trust, communication, and sexual connection
Why “sex addiction” is controversial—and how Out-of-Control Sexual Behavior (OCSB) offers a more compassionate, sex-positive alternative
How shame, trauma, and attachment can influence sexual behavior
Why understanding porn contextually matters more than judging it morally
This episode is perfect for listeners who:
Struggle with porn use in their relationship
Carry shame, fear, or religious conditioning around sexuality
Why these fantasies are common—especially among women—and almost never pathological
The neuroscience of fantasy: dopamine, oxytocin, reward loops, and why the brain revisits certain themes
When fantasy is healthy, when it’s a coping strategy, and when additional support is needed
How to help children and teens navigate early exposure to porn with safety—not shame
Why parents must separate adult interpretation from child development when kids encounter explicit content
How therapists can become safer guides by addressing their own discomfort around sexual topics
Perfect for listeners who:
Feel shame, confusion, or curiosity about their fantasies
Want to talk more openly with their partner about porn and desire
Grew up with conservative, purity-based sexual messaging
Are healing attachment injuries or betrayal around pornography
Want a science-based, sex-positive understanding of erotic imagination
Are parents or therapists navigating conversations about porn and sexuality
Mallorie and Claire bring humor, honesty, and clinical wisdom to a conversation most people never get to have—one that reframes fantasy as a window into longing, safety, and emotional connection, not as a sign of brokenness.
If you’ve ever wondered why your fantasies look the way they do—and what they actually mean—this episode will leave you f
What the Sexual Health Model and TINSA contribute to values-driven, sex-positive healing
Why individualized, flexible treatment plans matter far more than rigid abstinence goals
Perfect for listeners who:
Feel overwhelmed, ashamed, or confused about their porn use
Don’t resonate with “addiction” language
Grew up with religious or moral messaging around sexuality
Want a shame-free, scientifically grounded understanding of OCSB
Are healing from betrayal, secrecy, or emotional disconnection
Work in mental health and want updated, ethical treatment frameworks
Mallorie breaks down not just the behaviors, but the emotional stories beneath them — the trauma responses, attachment wounds, cultural scripts, and unmet needs that make porn a coping strategy for so many. She emphasizes that healing isn’t about achieving sexual “purity”; it’s about alignment, agency, emotional safety, and values-based sexual choices.
If you’ve ever wondered what actually works in treating porn-related distress — or why different people need radically different approaches — this episode brings clarity, depth, and compassion.
Up next: How to rebuild erotic confidence, connection, and trust after porn-related conflict in relationships.
How couples can move from fear and control to open, grounded, honest sexual communication
Why the term betrayal trauma is often misapplied—and how that misuse fuels anxiety instead of healing
How sexual autonomy, fantasy, and self-exploration strengthen intimacy rather than undermine it
Perfect for listeners who:
Struggle with jealousy, porn anxiety, or feeling “not enough”
Feel threatened by a partner’s sexuality or fantasies
Grew up in conservative, modesty-focused, or purity-based cultures
Want to understand gender differences without stereotypes
Are deconstructing the porn-addiction lens
Want healthier conversations about sex, fantasy, and desire
Mallorie and Natasha offer clinical insight, lived experience, and compassionate challenge to help listeners rethink the stories they’ve inherited about gender and sexuality. Their message is clear:
True intimacy can’t flourish where shame, fear, or behavioral policing take the lead.
But when couples create erotic safety, curiosity, and autonomy, pleasure expands—individually and together.
If you’ve ever internalized sexual double standards—or if porn has created conflict in your relationship—this episode will bring clarity, grounding, and real liberation.
Up next: How purity culture still shapes adult sexuality—and how to reclaim your erotic self.
Why ownership models of sexuality (“your sexuality belongs to me”) harm both partners
How couples can rebuild trust, reduce fear, and negotiate sexual values together
Perfect for listeners who:
Feel distressed about their own or their partner’s porn use
Grew up in conservative, high-shame, or religious environments
Have been told porn is addictive, dangerous, or morally destructive
Want evidence-based, sex-positive guidance instead of fear-based messaging
Struggle with desire differences, mismatched libidos, or sexual pressure
Want healthier conversations about porn, boundaries, and autonomy
Natasha and Mallorie offer depth, compassion, humor, and decades of expertise to help listeners rethink pornography—not through panic or shame, but through a lens of context, curiosity, and relational honesty.
If you’ve ever wondered whether your distress around porn is actually about porn—or something deeper—this episode will bring clarity, grounding, and relief.
Up next: Part 2 — How couples can repair betrayal, rebuild sexual confidence, and rewrite their stories around desire and porn.
How to cultivate erotic flexibility, expand fantasy beyond porn, and rebuild healthy arousal pathways
Perfect for listeners interested in:
Trauma recovery through a sex-positive lens
The psychology of porn use and fantasy
BDSM, kink, and power dynamics
Nervous system regulation and somatic healing
Healing sexual shame
Understanding “taboo” desires without judgment
Dr. Richmond offers grounding, compassionate insights drawn from decades of clinical experience, research, and somatic work. This episode reframes “problematic porn use” and “taboo fantasies” through an entirely new lens — one centered in meaning, nervous system responses, and the human drive for connection, agency, and aliveness.
If you’ve ever wondered why you or someone you love is drawn to certain fantasies — or if you want a shame-free understanding of trauma, desire, and erotic healing — this episode will change the way you think about sexuality.
Up next: Sexual fantasy as a tool for healing — what desire reveals about identity, power, and pleasure.
The rise of AI-generated deepfakes — and why they’re one of the biggest consent crises of our time
The growing movement for ethical porn, performer rights, and healthier sexual culture
Perfect for listeners who want to explore:
Porn history
Sexual politics and cultural power
Feminist perspectives on porn
Queer media and representation
Technology’s impact on sexuality
Consent, AI, and ethical erotic content
Dr. Sorce weaves together humor, research, and cultural analysis to show how every era of porn — from Victorian novels to AI deepfakes — reflects the anxieties, laws, hierarchies, and desires of the world that created it.
If you’ve ever wondered how we got from secret erotic manuscripts to infinite digital porn, this episode connects the dots.
Up next: Sexual fantasy and desire — what our inner world reveals about who we are.
How erotic expression shaped culture, religion, and power
Why sex has always been political, spiritual, and deeply human
How ancient attitudes toward desire differ dramatically from today
The roots of shame, censorship, and sexual control in the Western world
Dr. Sorce brings storytelling, humor, research, and global history together to reveal a powerful truth:
Before porn was a product, it was a carving, a poem, a ritual, a joke — and a mirror of who we’ve always been.
If you’re fascinated by the intersections of pornography, sexuality, religion, culture, and history, this episode will completely reframe how you see erotic media.
Next up: Part 2 — how Victorian morality, obscenity laws, photography, and the internet transformed ancient erotic expression into the modern porn landscape we know today.
