Come As You Are Podcast – Details, episodes & analysis

A talk about the state of the world for girls and women, growing up in a patriarchy, messages we absorb from the water we’re swimming in, male violence, assault, misogyny, sexual harassment, the male gaze, objectification, sexism - and the frustration of having to hurry and say “not all men” because of course not all men. But way too many of them. And we need them in the conversation.

Thanks for reading and listening to Come As You Are! Your comments and shares mean the world to me, thank you. And thanks for spending some time with me.

A talk about grief, loss, child loss, school shootings, gun violence, violence generally, the cancer of rampant self-interest, the pain, rage and despair of having school-age children in this environment, vulnerability, mortality, the patriarchy, intersectional feminism, democracy - and how we can try to make this world a more compassionate, sane, peaceful place with the 80-100 years we’ve got. Not small talk.

This is a talk about the relief that comes with seeing things as they are, instead of clinging to a version of reality we wish was unfolding. Sometimes we work really hard not to see the truth of our own feelings, or the truth of someone else’s feelings or the situation we’re in, because if we see it, things will have to change or we will have to change, or maybe we’re walking straight into heartbreak. It’s also a talk about words and their definitions, and how sometimes we use the same words, but we mean very different things.

A talk about grief, loss, panic attacks, the illusion of control, traveling into the future, past and present all at once, the space time continuum, and how sometimes letting go is the only way to ride the ride.

A talk about endings, abandonment issues, attachment styles, not asking other people to carry our baggage, and why it’s okay to hate goodbyes as long as you work on the rest of it!

This is a talk about the big transitions in life. We can all get focused on the destination, but sometimes the shore in front of us isn’t clear, and the task is to swim in the waters of uncertainty for a while. You can tread water, swim against the current and exhaust yourself, or move with it and let things flow, trusting you’ll land on solid ground eventually. Asking yourself the right questions is one of the best ways to find more ease and strength when the weather changes and the current starts pulling you in a direction you didn’t expect. This is also a talk about the quality of your inner voice and why it matters so much, motherhood, the sandwich generation, empty nest syndrome, divorce, post-divorce dating, and trying to keep it together for your kids. It’s not a talk that’s just for parents, it’s for anyone who struggles with change.

A talk about those “nothing” moments that are really everything, meeting love wherever you find it, allowing yourself to feel joy, grief, longing, gratitude, vulnerability, and fragility all at once, and recognizing if you want steadiness in life, you have to find it inside yourself.

A talk about empathy -which, by definition - flows freely in all directions. A conversation about binary thinking, the danger of dehumanizing those who disagree with us, and where we might be at war within ourselves, since outward violence is a reflection of inward pain.

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A talk about the high cost of "othering" people, and the pain and exhaustion of swimming in rage-filled water, which is daily life right now.

A talk about cognitive dissonance and the painful toll it takes. When we feel one way but act another for any number of reasons, when we know something is very wrong but are asked to go about our days like everything is normal, when we can no longer have nuanced conversation or express our heartache openly, the result is despair, confusion, depression, anxiety, overwhelm and loneliness. What's the answer? Have a listen.