CLOSER with Rachel Lim is about the conversations beneath the surface.
Rachel sits down with people who fascinate her to explore not just what they’ve done, but what has shaped who they are: the experiences, relationships, contradictions, failures, beliefs and questions that have made them who they are today.
Alongside long-form conversations are personal reflections from Rachel on what she is learning, unlearning and seeing differently in her own life. There may not always be a clear answer.. but perhaps the point is to come away seeing someone differently, seeing ourselves differently, and feeling a little closer.
To ourselves.
To each other.
To what matters.
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Raising Conscious Humans: Raising Children With an Inner Compass
Tuesday, October 6, 2026 • Duration 41:05
When do children stop trusting themselves?
They start out asking why about everything. They know what they like. They challenge us. They follow their curiosity without wondering whether they’re doing it “right”. And then, somewhere along the way, many start looking outside themselves for the answers.
In the 2nd episode of Raising Conscious Humans, I sit down again with Hwee Keng Maeder, mother of three boys, including Singapore’s youngest Olympic medallist, Max Maeder, to talk about how we protect that inner compass instead of slowly overriding it. She tells me, “You can’t want to raise a curious child that doesn’t challenge you. Then it’s not a curious child.”
We talk about knowing when to step in and when not to rescue, including why she resisted bringing her youngest home from a summer camp in Greece even when he called every day asking to leave. We also talk about giving children real responsibility, letting them face consequences, and creating different “pockets” where they can build confidence and self-worth, so their whole identity doesn’t rest on our approval or how well they perform.
And I share a moment with Ollie that made me realise how easily our children’s struggles can start to feel like a reflection of us.
At the heart of it is one question:
How do we raise children who can trust themselves?
Chapters
00:00:00 Introduction
00:02:00 Curious Child vs. Compliant Child
00:03:38 It’s Okay to Say, “Not Right Now”
00:04:49 Honouring the Child’s Agenda, Not Ours
00:08:52 How Good Intentions Can Kill Curiosity
00:11:47 Creating a Safe Space for Questions and Discernment
00:15:11 When to Sit With Discomfort Instead of Rescuing
00:19:11 “Is This for Them, or Is This for Me?”
00:23:21 When Our Child’s Struggle Feels Like Our Failure
00:27:45 Giving Children Space to Build Their Own Confidence
00:33:48 Letting Children Face Consequences
00:37:40 Raising Conscious Humans, Not Compliant Ones
00:39:01 The Mindset Shift That Changes How We Parent
Follow CLOSER on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/closerwithrach/
Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/
#61: Dr. Ramani: The Signs of a Narcissistic Relationship & How Not to Lose Yourself
Episode 61
Tuesday, September 29, 2026 • Duration 39:23
The word narcissist gets thrown around a lot. But what does narcissism actually look like in a relationship, and what happens to us when we spend too long trying to manage someone else? In this episode of CLOSER, I sit down with clinical psychologist and bestselling author Dr. Ramani Durvasula to unpack narcissism beyond the label: the subtle signs we often miss, why narcissistic people can be so charming to the outside world, and why the people closest to them can have a completely different experience.
We talk about what it feels like to walk on eggshells, to second-guess what you say, to give endlessly but feel unsupported in return, and how, over time, you can begin silencing parts of yourself just to keep the peace. Dr. Ramani also shares why we cannot change another person's narcissism, what healthy boundaries and realistic expectations can look like, and why compassion for someone else should not require abandoning yourself. We explore healing, self-blame, healthy ego, social media, and how we can raise children with a stronger sense of who they are.
One idea from this conversation stayed with me: more than one thing can be true at the same time. You can love someone and still be hurt by them. You can see the good in them and acknowledge that their behaviour may not change. And sometimes, healing begins with seeing the relationship for what it is, rather than continuing to believe that if we just love better, give more, or say the right thing, we can make it different.
Chapters
00:00:00 Introduction
00:01:26 What Is Narcissism, Really?
00:03:57 Narcissism Is a Spectrum
00:06:12 How Dr. Ramani Recognised Narcissism in Her Own Life
00:08:42 What a Narcissistic Relationship Actually Feels Like
00:12:49 Is Social Media Fueling Narcissism?
00:15:16 How to Raise Children With a Strong Sense of Self
00:19:30 Can a Narcissist Actually Change?
00:21:26 How to Stop Blaming Yourself and Set Boundaries
00:24:36 The Biggest Myths About Narcissism
00:26:12 Healthy Ego vs. Narcissism
00:27:49 When Compassion Becomes Self-Abandonment
00:30:10 “It’s Not You”
00:32:04 Be Their Parent, Not Their Peer
00:35:53 What Dr. Ramani Wants You to Know About Narcissism
Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/doctorramani?stkn=MWcxZXNwdng3YzZteA==
Follow Dr. Ramani Durvasula here:
https://doctor-ramani.com/
Raising Conscious Humans: Raising the Child You Have, Not the Child You Want
Tuesday, September 15, 2026 • Duration 43:08
Hwee Keng said: “There is a personality in that small human being... you don’t know the settings. First, I think you need to find out the settings.”
As parents, we spend so much energy shaping who we hope our children will become, and perhaps not enough time discovering who they already are.
What struck me about Hwee Keng is how much of her parenting has been about unlearning her own expectations. She even caught herself once after feeling disappointed that Max didn’t win a competition, and realised some of that disappointment was about her own ego.
That hit me. Because maybe the work is not raising the child we imagined, but learning to really see the child in front of us.
In this episode, we talk about curiosity over performance, giving children real agency, the difference between “you’ve got this” and “we’ve got you,” responsibility, consequences, and what it means to raise children who are truly fit for life.
Follow CLOSER on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/closerwithrach/
Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/
#60: SG's Fastest Woman on What Success Never Taught Her
Season 2 · Episode 60
Tuesday, August 11, 2026 • Duration 47:37
Before Shanti Pereira became Singapore's fastest woman, before she made history on some of the world's biggest stages, she was a ten-year-old girl who lost a few races in primary school and wanted to quit.
That's where we begin. Not with the medals, but with the moments most people never see. Losing both her scholarships within the same week at 22 and sharing, "It really felt like rejection." Getting injured in an Olympic year after achieving her dream of qualifying for Paris on merit, and wondering if she'd even make it to the start line. The unglamorous discipline of showing up on the days she didn't feel like it at all.
What struck me most wasn't Shanti's list of achievements.. it was the way she spoke about identity. About learning not to tie her self-worth to success or failure. About protecting her peace. And about choosing, again and again, not to give up when things get hard.
At the end of every season, whether it's been a good one or a difficult one, she asks herself: "Did I show up?" I think that's a question all of us need from time to time.
I hope you'll enjoy this conversation with Shanti Pereira.
Chapters
00:00:00 Meet Shanti Pereira: The Woman Behind Singapore’s Fastest Sprint
00:01:20 Growing Up in the Shadow of Track and Field
00:03:46 The Childhood Lesson That Changed Everything
00:05:27 Grounded Advice For Her Younger Self
00:06:54 Facing Rejection: Losing Two Scholarships in a Single Week
00:09:14 Defying Failure and Choosing Resilience
00:12:40 Managing Olympic Dreams Amidst Physical Injuries
00:18:09 Staying Grounded: Body Care, Aging, and Reconnecting With Her "Why"
00:20:23 Choosing Stillness Over Chaos at the Starting Line
00:25:12 Tuning Out Public Pressure to Protect Your Joy
00:27:56 How to Reset Your Mindset After a Bad Race
00:30:48 The Powerful Advice That Stayed With Her
00:31:33 Finding Her Identity Beyond Winning and Losing
00:34:23 The Unseen Work and Human Side of Elite Performance
00:36:17 Choosing Consistency and Building Unshakable Habits
00:37:36 Shanti Pereira’s Definition of a Champion
00:39:19 Inspiring the Next Generation of Athletes
00:40:13 Sacrificing Her 20s: Choosing a Different Path Without Regret
00:41:23 Entering a Milestone Decade and Looking Toward Her Next Era
00:43:35 Shanti Pereira’s Recovery Rituals and Wellness Staples
00:45:18 The Message She Hopes to Leave Behind
00:46:05 Staying True to Herself Beyond the Spotlight
00:46:41 Final Reflections
Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/
Follow Shanti Pereira here: https://www.instagram.com/vshantipereira/
#59: What Success Never Prepared Me For with Ingck
Season 2 · Episode 59
Wednesday, July 22, 2026 • Duration 59:48
Most people know Ing as the founder of INGU - the skincare brand that sold out 30,000 units in three minutes with zero advertising. The trusted voice who built a community of millions by doing the one thing his industry often punishes: telling the truth.
But this conversation isn't really about skincare.. it's about what happens after you build something people believe in. The weight of carrying other people's trust. The loneliness of being misunderstood. The panic attacks that made him think he was dying. The goodbye video he filmed, edited, and still hasn't had the courage to post.
For the first time, Ing shares what was happening behind the scenes during one of the biggest seasons of his life, and how it changed the way he thinks about ambition, happiness and success itself. We also talk about the person who answered the phone from a surgery room when Ing thought he was going to die on the floor of a café, and why that relationship ultimately reshaped his definition of what really matters.
I left this conversation seeing success a little differently. I hope you do too.
Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/
Follow Ing here: https://www.instagram.com/ingck/
Follow Ingu Skin here: https://www.instagram.com/inguskin/
#58: What If Your Next Chapter Is Bigger Than You've Imagined?
Episode 58
Wednesday, July 1, 2026 • Duration 23:47
You don't need a crisis to enter a new chapter. Sometimes life is moving along just fine. And yet, you find yourself carrying questions you can't quite shake.
This conversation feels especially meaningful to me. Three years ago, Bill Burnett helped shape one of the biggest chapters of my life. Today, I'm returning to his work because the questions I'm asking have changed, and I need that space again.
Together, we explore why so many of us feel there's "something more," why life was never meant to be a straight line, and how creating the time, space, and structure to think differently can help us navigate what's next with greater clarity, intention, and possibility.
If this conversation resonates with you, Bill and I will be hosting a special CLOSER experience in Singapore on 25th July. We'd love for you to join us as we explore what your next chapter could become.
Sing up for CLOSER x Bill Burnett here: https://tinyurl.com/5n7dkdrb
Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/
Visit Bill Burnett’s website here: https://designingyour.life/
Read ‘Designing Your Life’ here: https://designingyour.life/books-designing-life-original-book/
#57: What 'Kiasu' Culture Is Really Costing Us with Teo You Yenn
Season 2 · Episode 57
Tuesday, June 16, 2026 • Duration 43:11
Most of us have been taught that the pressure Singaporean parents feel is a mindset problem. That we just need to relax. Stop being so kiasu. The data tells a completely different story.
Associate Professor Teo You Yenn spent three years interviewing 92 Singaporean parents across every class background for her new book Unease; and what she found will reframe how you see your own life. Not just parenting. The whole thing.
She makes the case that the exhaustion, the anxiety, the feeling that you're doing everything right and still something is off.. none of it is personal. It's structural. And until we understand that distinction, nothing changes.
We talked about:
Why "kiasu" is not a cultural trait; and what it actually is
What it means that most parents describe their child as a problem to solve
Why Singapore's falling birth rate isn't a fertility problem - it's a conditions-for-family-life problem
The three quiet costs to our society that nobody is talking about
What the opposite of unease actually is (it's not ease)
What stayed with me long after we stopped recording: the way we're living is shaping who we're becoming. As individuals, as parents, as a society. And we haven't stopped to ask if this is who we want to be.
Chapters
00:00:00 Introduction
00:01:36 Meet You Yenn: Exposing the Contradiction of Singaporean Success
00:04:02 Defining “Unease”: The Quiet Struggle of Helplessness in Singapore
00:05:45 Why “Kiasu Mentality” is Too Simple an Excuse
00:07:33 How the System Conditions Singaporeans to Run the Race
00:10:48 The Painful Cost of Losing Agency
00:12:00 Returning to the Original Dream of Prosperity in Singapore
00:14:30 Seeing Our Children Through the Lens of Problems
00:16:49 Reevaluating Our Values Across Class Lines
00:20:48 The Unequal Weight of Motherhood
00:23:42 What Does a “Pro-Family” Society Look Like?
00:25:43 Singapore’s Low TFR: A Fertility Problem or a Family Life Problem?
00:28:01 Singapore’s Obsession with Finding “Top Talents”
00:32:29 Shifting the Narrow Definition of “Family” in Singapore
00:34:17 Writing for a Historian 50 Years from Now
00:36:10 Finding Hope in a Shared Public Resonance
00:39:15 Final Reflections
Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/
Follow You Yenn’s updates here: https://www.instagram.com/ethosbooks/
Purchase ‘Unease: Life in Singapore Families’ here: https://www.ethosbooks.com.sg/products/unease-life-in-singapore-families
Write in to the team at hello@rachreflects.com
#56: Minister Indranee Rajah: What Does It Take to Want a Future in Singapore?
Season 2 · Episode 56
Tuesday, May 19, 2026 • Duration 49:07
Singapore's total fertility rate has hit a historic low. But this conversation was never really about birth rates.
It was about what modern life actually feels like for many Singaporeans today. The pressure. The exhaustion. The invisible weight of always having to keep up. And the quiet calculation so many people are running; about whether building a family here is something they can imagine, afford, or want.
Minister Indranee Rajah leads Singapore's Marriage and Parenthood Reset. She is also single. And she has no children of her own.
In this conversation, we go beyond policy. We talk about:
- The invisible mental load women carry that no support system fully removes
- The pressure parents feel before a child is even born - and why it starts earlier than most people realise
- The women who have built lives they genuinely love - and aren't sure they want to give that up
- What the public reaction to the word "detour" was really saying
- What it means to lead this conversation as a single woman without children
- The family she lost - and why their absence shaped her understanding of family itself
- Whether modern Singaporean life still feels emotionally sustainable enough to build a family within
Chapters
00:00:00 Minister Indranee Rajah: The Minister Tasked With Singapore’s Future
00:02:50 Growing Up Between Two Cultures & Faiths
00:05:59 Her Mother's Greatest Gift
00:06:57 How Her Legal Mindset Shapes Singapore’s Toughest Conversation
00:10:21 Why Singaporeans Are Rejecting the Life Script — Not Family
00:14:36 The Overachievement Culture That Made Good Enough Feel Like Failure
00:17:14 The Growing Pressure of Raising Kids in Singapore
00:21:08 The Invisible Mental Load Women Carry
00:22:31 The Woman Who Hid Her Fertility Treatment From Her Boss
00:23:37 Addressing Singaporean Work Culture & Fertility Stigma
00:29:56 Why Singaporeans Are Choosing Their Quality of Life Over Parenthood
00:32:07 The “Detour” Comment That Sparked Debate
00:35:37 Leading Singapore’s Parenthood Conversation as a Single Woman
00:38:10 Why Baby Bonuses Don’t Apply to Unwed Mothers
00:41:43 Why She's Doing This — Even When Everyone Says It's Impossible
00:44:47 What Makes Her Believe Singapore Can Change
Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/
Follow Minister Indranee here: https://www.instagram.com/indraneerajah/
Download the FSS fertility workplace support guide here: https://fertilitysupport.sg/wp-content/uploads/2025/07/FSS-workplace-support-guide.pdf
Write in to the team at hello@rachreflects.com.
#55: The Fertility Convo That's Long Overdue ft. Margaret Wang
Season 2 · Episode 55
Tuesday, May 12, 2026 • Duration 27:51
Most of us only start thinking about fertility when something suddenly feels urgent; a doctor’s appointment, a breakup, a birthday, or the quiet realisation that time may not feel as endless as we once thought. In this episode, I sit down with Margaret Wang, CEO of GenPrime and Rhea Fertility, for a deeply honest conversation about fertility, womanhood, pressure, timing, and learning to listen to our bodies before life forces us to.
Together, we talk about:
why fertility shouldn’t just be a “women’s issue”
the invisible emotional load many women quietly carry
egg freezing, aging, and the pressure surrounding motherhood and timelines
the questions many of us don’t even know to ask about our own bodies
and why so many women still feel alone in this conversation
Margaret also opens up personally about navigating egg freezing, heartbreak, societal expectations, and the tension between building a career, building a company, and hoping to one day build a family. Whether fertility feels far away, deeply present, or painfully emotional for you right now, this conversation is an invitation to get curious, ask earlier questions, and feel a little less alone.
Chapters
00:00:00 Introduction
00:01:09 Get to Know Margaret Wang: The Woman Reshaping Fertility Care Across Asia
00:04:18 A Holistic Approach to Redefining Fertility Stigma
00:06:12 Egg Freezing: Progress, Freedom and the Gaps We Don’t Talk About
00:08:52 Why Fertility Conversations Still Feel Taboo
00:13:22 Nobody Taught Us How Fertility Actually Works
00:15:51 How to Ask the Right Questions About Fertility
00:19:01 Numerical Age vs Biological Age: Is It Too Late?
00:21:08 Debunking Fertility Myths and Misconceptions
00:23:20 The Personal Cost of Working in Fertility Care
00:25:53 Margaret Wang’s Message to the World
00:27:07 Final Reflections
Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/
Connect with Margaret here: https://sg.linkedin.com/in/margaretmwang
Find out more about Rhea Fertility here: https://www.rheafertility.com/
Write in to the team at hello@rachreflects.com.
#54: Nathania Ong: First Singaporean to Lead the West End, And She Almost Gave Up
Season 2 · Episode 54
Tuesday, April 28, 2026 • Duration 46:49
Nathania Ong is the first Singaporean to lead both Les Misérables and Hamilton on London’s West End.
But before any of that, she was 18, alone in a foreign city, rejected by every drama school she applied to in a single week.
This is a story about the years nobody sees.. the flight home after every door closes, and the quiet season where you have to decide: Do I keep going, or do I let this go?
In this conversation, Nathania opens up about:
the rejections that almost broke her
the stage fright she developed after going viral
the best friend who talked her back from the edge
and the philosophy that has carried her through every closed door since
“Sometimes it’s not no. Sometimes it’s not yet. And what is for you will not pass you by.”
Chapters
00:00:00 Introduction
00:01:29 Meet Nathania Ong: From Singapore to the West End
00:02:35 Growing Up in a House Full of Voices
00:07:11 The First Win That Changed Everything
00:10:00 Losing Singing — and Finding Herself Again
00:13:57 Five Rejections in One Week
00:18:00 “I Almost Gave Up”
00:19:47 The Second Chance She Almost Didn’t Take
00:25:55 Her Greatest Triumph Wasn’t Success
00:28:10 What Keeps You Going When Nothing Does
00:29:18 Why Rejection Feels So Personal
00:32:22 Becoming Éponine — And Redefining the Role
00:37:00 When Success Brings Fear
00:38:28 Stage Fright, Anxiety, and Finding Ground Again
00:41:04 Pre-Show Rituals & Becoming the Character
00:42:04 Creating Something Honest for Herself
00:43:33 What She’d Tell Her Younger Self
00:45:11 Advice for Anyone Chasing a Dream
00:45:38 Final Reflections
Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/
Follow Nathania Ong here: https://www.instagram.com/nattyong/
Write in to the team at hello@rachreflects.com.
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