Clashists – Details, episodes & analysis

Hi! Here we are. This is our first episode. In terms of what you can expect - we'd say general first-episode-of-a-podcast kind of stuff, We tell you who we are, why we're fascinated by the concept of "culture shock" (in all of its forms), and how it's affected both of our lives. Other topics? The ~romantic~ tales of why we wound up in Paris (spoiler alert: one involves kidney stones & the other, a dead body), why we love stranger energy, how the only compliment we've ever received from a French person was while dressed as Princess Diana, and how the impossibility of getting the bill in Paris is actually a blessing.

In this ep, we explore why making friends in your 30s isn't easy- and why that might actually be OK. Also- do French people hate being asked questions?? (Gab has thoughts), and why you should 100% slide into more strangers' DMs. Plus- Paris' best Venezuelan food & why onion soup mix has unexpected international appeal.

Content referenced:

How Solitude Is Rewiring American Identity, The Atlantic: https://www.theatlantic.com/newsletters/archive/2025/01/americas-crisis-of-aloneness/681251/

Magical Overthinking About Adult Friendships: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/overthinking-about-adult-friendships/id1745220403?i=1000678377740

Harvard Study of Adult Development: https://www.adultdevelopmentstudy.org/

Mistakingly Seeking Solitude: https://faculty.haas.berkeley.edu/jschroeder/Publications/Epley&Schroeder2014.pdf

We are BACK with an ep alllll about how weird French jobs are. But also great. There is greatness there too. Dani schools Gabby on the oddities of French corporate employment and (spoiler alert) unemployment. Gabby sits mouth agape at the concept of severance and worker's rights. Latter half includes spirals about tactless favor-asking and demanding group chats, and a much-needed ode to BIG salads.

The first of what we can fully assure you will be a ~nearly incessant~ amount of eps about dating, We compare dating in NYC vs Paris (SPOILER ALERT: they're both bad! <3), why French men love to stroke your hand & split a 12 euro bill, and the absolute ~joys~ of 2 year situationships. Plus - why muting your friends is an act of LOVE & finishing your sentences with "right?" is peak manipulation. And plz comment your fav/least fav dating stories on IG @clashists - Gabby's misery needs company.

Also y'all - I remembered to put it in the show notes (Jimmy Fallon's Z105 sketch: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ik3GDAa3gek

An overly dramatic ep title meant to highlight how ~odd~ NYC dining has become, and how some of Paris' most "annoying" restaurant-related traits are maybe actually...beautiful? We'll discuss everything from why we sort of love not being able to get a waiter to bring us the check, to why Gabby kept getting kicked out of NYC restaus, to the joys of cheap wine and sorrows of stingy ice distribution. Plus - the dairy-on-dairy combo that's making Gabby moo-an (sry), Dani's vendetta against wooden stools, and a vehement rant on subway pole etiquette 101.

~ Dani's new Substack, This is Probably About Food! : https://substack.com/@thisisprobaboutfood

~ Our friend Sutanya's killer book: https://www.amazon.com/Dinner-One-Cooking-Paris-Saved/dp/0778333035

~ Substack event! (March 5th in Paris): https://www.eventbrite.com/e/billets-a-new-fashion-navigating-substack-in-an-age-of-oversaturated-platforms-1244359315209

~ Caitlin Gunther's NYT, Modern Love piece: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/02/21/style/modern-love-divorce-paris-trying-to-not-love-him.html

~ The Cut article on snark reddits (by Brooke LaMantia): https://www.thecut.com/article/reddit-influencer-snark-confessions.html

~ Gabby Windey does in fact have a podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/long-winded-with-gabby-windey/id1729279320

~ "Frozen Food’s New Wave" in The Atlantic (by Meghan McCarron): https://www.theatlantic.com/culture/archive/2025/02/frozen-food-reputation/681710/

HOT TAKE! That sums up this entire episode. One egregious hot take. And just in time for Paris Fashion Week, no less. But truly: are Parisians interesting dressers? What are they actually wearing day-to-day? And why did it shock this pod's hosts? What is "effortlessness"? And why are people so convinced that French women have it? Dani + Gabby dissect these hard-hitting questions as the world crumbles around us. Service-journalism! Also on tap? A ~soft girl cheese~ session, what Gabby is willing to risk e-coli for, and why we're taking the cool back from mean girls.

Things referenced:

The Myth of Effortless Style, by Daisy Maldonado (Vogue): https://www.vogue.com/article/the-myth-of-effortless-style

The New Parisienne, by Lindsey Tramuta: https://www.amazon.com/New-Parisienne-Women-Ideas-Shaping/dp/1419742817

Dani's Paris clothes rental service = Le Closet (link offers 30 euro off): https://www.lecloset.fr/free-closet?referrerToken=vintagedaniela28

Salon D'Agriculture (just wrapped this year but keep your eye on it for next yr!): https://www.salon-agriculture.com/en

Gab's man Brillat-Savarin (reference pic): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jean_Anthelme_Brillat-Savarin

It's a baby bottle ep! (IYKYK) We rapid-fire run through some of our (and our listeners'!) most startling ~mini culture clashes~, 30% of which are bra-related for reasons unbeknownst to us. Also discussed? Dead bird heads, confusing toilet situations, "love hotels", and why we'll never get over the French's pronunciation of the word "smoothie".

Today on the pod? Friendship breakups. We promise you you're not alone. Whether you've been ghosted, phased out, or downright dumped, recording this ep made us realize just how common this shame-inducing experience really is. Bright side/bold claim?: It might be leading us to our higher selves? Or, at the very least, weeding out some absolute weirdos. Then, Dani advocates for setting more stuff on fire (for a cause!) and Gabby reveals her vendetta against cancelers. Be sure to leave room for snack spirals involving two carb-filled classics.

The Cut's article on friendship breakups (by Melissa Dahl): https://www.thecut.com/article/friendship-breakups-pain-explained-psychology.html

Southern Charm: https://www.bravotv.com/southern-charm

Avery McClure (Gab's call for the "next big thing"): https://www.instagram.com/averymcclure0/?hl=en

Existential crises abound! Today we discuss the various life events that have altered our personalities — from moving between cities and starting new relationships to actively chipping away at our less desirable traits. How has marrying a French man impacted Dani? How has incessantly being described as neurotic driven Gabby to self help articles? Only this ep will tell! Also ft: France's interpretation of "corn dogs" (heavy emphasis on interpretation), the ageless joy of Kinder eggs, and why both of your beloved hosts are spiralling into scaffolding-induced insanity.

The Atlantic — "I Gave Myself Three Months to Change My Personality" by Olga Khazan: https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2022/03/how-to-change-your-personality-happiness/621306/

Olga's new book — Me, But Better: The Science and Promise of Personality Change: https://www.amazon.com/Me-But-Better-Science-Personality/dp/1668012545

The New Yorker — "Becoming You: Are you the same person you were when you were a child?" by Joshua Rothman: https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2022/10/10/are-you-the-same-person-you-used-to-be-life-is-hard-the-origins-of-you

Obama's code-switching vid: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSch9x_RuJU

Info on Erewhon Paris edition: https://www.vogue.fr/article/merci-pop-up-erewhon-paris

The Culture Study Podcast on With Love, Meghan: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/figuring-out-how-to-feel-about-with-love-meghan/id1718662839?i=1000699786274

And not for the faint of heart — Zuckerberg's Benson Boone role play: https://www.instagram.com/zuck/reel/DGoDxw5PvlH/?hl=en

Welcome back to another episode in which we spiral about the increasingly odd relationship between NYC & Paris. Are we the problem? Is this play about us?? We ask ourself these hard-hitting questions and more, like: How do you successfully export a concept to a new country? Can you translate a feeling? Why are we seeing so much cross-pollination between the two cities lately? And ... should Paris maybe just stop trying to make the bagel happen? We wash it all down with a solid rant attacking Parisians for their incessant need to speak English back to us despite our noble attempts at speaking French (let us live!) and some artery-clogging snacks.

Emily Sundberg's Feed Me: New York City has a France problem: https://substack.com/home/post/p-158859893?utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web

This Is TASTE 529: New York’s New Semi-Anonymous Restaurant Critic with Feed Me’s J Lee: https://tastecooking.com/this-is-taste-529-new-yorks-new-semi-anonymous-restaurant-critic-with-feed-mes-j-lee/

Mackenzie Barmen (@mackenziebarmen) on TikTok (click on "Sixty-Somethings Series"): https://www.tiktok.com/@mackenziebarmen?lang=en

Best Baguette in Paris 2025 winner: https://www.sortiraparis.com/en/news/in-paris/articles/326261-the-best-baguette-in-paris-2025-mickael-reydellet-crowned-king-of-baguettes-in-paris#:~:text=The%20best%20baguette%20in%20Paris%20in%202025%20comes%20from%20Micka%C3%ABl,by%20the%20City%20of%20Paris.

Offline podcast ep ft. Supercommunicators' author Charles Duhigg: https://podcasts.apple.com/mt/podcast/offline-pc-small-group/id1610392666?i=1000701027361