Explore every episode of the podcast [B]OLD AGE With Debbie Weil
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| Podcast Finale: Debbie & Sam Reflect on Five Years of Podcasting and Ten Gap Years | 31 May 2024 | 00:32:17 | |
Today is a special episode because, after five years, this podcast is ending. You’ll hear why in this episode. Debbie and her husband, Sam Harrington, talk about why it’s time for a finale, about getting old, about legacy (and how it’s different for the two of them, right now), about their life during the past decade, how it's changing even now (they're both 72), and about what lies ahead, at least creatively. Frankly, Debbie doesn't sound very happy in this episode, but that’s because this has been a hard decision. Debbie thinks it's the right one; Sam needs convincing. But there is some good news! Debbie is continuing to explore the topic of [b]old age on Substack where she writes essays, host Q&A’s, and has created a lively community of [b]old women writers, in their 60s, 70s, and 80s. And some younger women too. She invites you to join her on Substack! It's more interactive than the podcast, you'll get to know other subscribers in the Comments, and you can offer your own take on the topic of what it's really like to get old and why it requires [b]oldness. https://debbieweil.substack.com Endings are always bittersweet but you've got access to 120 past episodes of [B]old Age on Apple or wherever you listen to podcasts. ////////// Continue the conversation about [B]old Age, and what getting old is really like, on Debbie's [B]OLD AGE Substack. //////////
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| Author Sarah Fay on Healing Her Own Mental Illness and Applying Less and Less of More and More to Life and Substack | 10 May 2024 | 00:40:12 | |
Today, Debbie talks with Sarah Fay, a 52-year-old award-winning author, writing teacher, and mental health keynote speaker whose work has been featured on NPR, Oprah Daily, Forbes, The Los Angeles Times, and more. Her journalistic memoir Pathological: The True Story of Six Misdiagnoses (HarperCollins, 2022) was an Apple Best Books pick and was hailed in The New York Times as a “fiery manifesto of a memoir.” Her sequel, Cured: The Memoir, tells the story of Sarah’s full recovery from serious mental illness and how recovery is possible for everyone. She writes for many publications, including The New York Times, The Atlantic, Time, and The Paris Review, where she was an advisory editor. Her essays have been chosen as a Notable Mention in Best American Essays and nominated for Pushcart Prizes. As a teacher, she’s on the faculty at Northwestern University and runs Writers at Work, a weekly publication with workshops to help creative writers produce their best work on Substack and get paid (very) well to do it. Her master plan is to make Substack the literary center of the universe. They talk about the parallels between Sarah’s journey of recovery from misdiagnosis to curing her own serious mental illness and her work teaching Substack writers to think big (and get paid for it). Debbie wanted to know if Sarah’s journey to mental health was connected to her success as a writer AND to her ability and desire to help other writers. The answer is yes. They touch on emotional literacy, the prerequisites for healing from mental illness, how to deal with anxieties as writers, what Substack is and who it is for, and what Sarah loves most about helping other writers.
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| Rona Maynard on How Adopting a Rescue Mutt When She Was 65 Made Her a Better Person | 10 Nov 2023 | 00:33:50 | |
Today, Debbie talks with Rona Maynard, an author, writer, and former VIP, as she puts it. When she left Canada's leading magazine for women as editor-in-chief, she began looking for her next big project. Around this time, her husband suggested getting a dog. She resisted for several years, then relented. When she was 65, they adopted Casey, a two-year-old rescue mutt with an appealing personality. He left dog hairs everywhere and peed on her favorite chair the day they brought him home. But the result was an unexpected next new thing, a gradual transformation of how she is approaching life, and a lovely new book, a memoir, titled Starter Dog. ////////// Don't miss the Behind The Scenes essay for each new episode in Debbie's [B]OLD AGE newsletter. ////////// Of course, the book is not just about her dog. Rona is an extraordinary writer so it is the woven story of her life as a young woman and a young wife, her ambitions, her relationship to food (and Casey’s), getting older, and how - with Casey leading the way through her Toronto neighborhood - she began to soften and notice more. In the book she illuminates how taking Casey for daily walks ultimately made her a better person. She pulls the past and present together, and, engagingly, includes quotations from two of Debbie's favorite poets: Emily Dickinson and Gerard Manley Hopkins. Rona learns how to be kind (kindness was not stressed when she was growing up in a household full of ambition), how to befriend strangers and the homeless, how to appreciate the details of changing seasons and the outdoors (after working at a desk for so many years), how to be more patient, and how to live in the moment. Because of course while she was growing old - eight years pass - her dog was growing older. Casey is now 10, while Rona's in her mid-70s, and he’s teaching her how to embrace old age. Just take it one walk, one squirrel, one bowl of dog food (two if you’re lucky), and one day at a time. Mentioned in this episode or useful:
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| Debbie's Story: Connecting the Dots Backwards | 20 Dec 2019 | 00:08:30 | |
As a special episode to celebrate the conclusion of the first year of this podcast, host Debbie Weil shares her own story. At her recent college reunion, she performed a five-minute story on the theme of picking up the pieces. That means finding happiness after a setback or a challenge or, in the case of some of her other classmates who told stories, a personal tragedy. Debbie's story starts when she is a young mother and takes us up to the present day. Don't worry; it goes fast. Her story unfolds in five minutes with some unexpected twists and turns. We knew this story had to air on the podcast because it's a version of one we hear over and over from so many: what happens when things don't go as planned? Tune in to hear a story of how life can lead you down a path you never could have imagined. Debbie's is a story of dreams fulfilled after the age of 60. It's a story that proves it’s never too late to reinvent yourself. Mentioned in this episode
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| An Executive's Story: Taking a Sabbatical With Susan De Cuba | 06 Dec 2019 | 00:30:28 | |
Debbie talks with Susan De Cuba, an accomplished nonprofit executive who spent the last 13 years of her career as CEO of a hospice group in Florida. When Debbie met Susan, she was at the end of her gap year. After 40+ years of non-stop work, she had decided to take a year off - but in a purposeful way. Susan is practical and she is strategic. And she had a goal - to figure out her next step. Listen in as Debbie picks her brain about:
She felt a desire to serve others and she also knew she wanted freedom and flexibility. Most important, we talk about how she remained open to possibilities, especially around money and resources, and how that led her through a rejuvenating and, ultimately, successful gap year. PHOTO: Susan dancing in Mexico at the beginning of her gap year sabbatical. Mentioned in this episode Support this podcast:
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| Aging Myths and Misconceptions and How They Translate Into a Missed Market Opportunity | 22 Nov 2019 | 00:27:39 | |
Recently this podcast was invited to co-host a Next For Me event in NYC called “Myths & Misconceptions: The Truth About 50+ Consumers." (Full disclosure: NFM is one of our sponsors.) The other co-hosts were Stria News and Silvernest. Stria News is a media platform for the longevity market that inspires cross-sector solutions for our aging society. Silvernest is an online service that pairs boomers, retirees and empty nesters with compatible housemates for long-term home sharing. The event took place at Trove Social, a social club for people in their prime, in lower Manhattan. About 50 people attended, all of whom are active in one way or another with the midlife reinvention movement. That included members of the media, marketers, entrepreneurs and consumers. The goal was to discuss, honestly and openly, the myths and misconceptions surrounding the age 50+ demographic and how this translates into a lost market opportunity. And to bust those myths. You’re probably familiar with a lot of them:
The underlying question: what if more people recognized that those 50 and up are a vast, diverse and untapped source of potential dollar revenue as well as being overlooked contributors to society? Some of us might still be having sex while others don’t. Some of us love technology and the latest iPhone while others tolerate it or ignore it. The point is that the millions of members of this age 50-plus demographic are all different. And yet we all seem to be confronted with the same ageist attitudes and the same misconceptions about who we are as individuals. In this episode Debbie chats with Jeff Tidwell, co-founder of Next For Me. This is a follow-up to Debbie's conversation with Jeff in EP8 of Season 1. She also talks to Susan Donley, founder, publisher and CEO of Stria News, and to Wendi Burkhardt, co-founder and CEO of Silvernest. PHOTO: Debbie, left, and Wendi Burkhardt of Silvernest.
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| Nomadic Matt on travel as a way to reinvent yourself | 08 Nov 2019 | 00:22:15 | |
Matthew Kepnes is best known as Nomadic Matt, the name of his eponymous website dedicated to traveling smarter, cheaper and longer. He tells us in the first few pages of his new memoir that he has spent more than 3,000 nights in a thousand different cities in 90 countries so Debbie figured he would be the perfect guest to talk about travel as a way to reinvent yourself. Now 38, Matt recently settled down in Austin, Texas after over 10 years of longterm traveling in Asia and other parts of the world. We talk about the emotional aspects of travel, the courage it takes to detach yourself from societal expectations (keep a steady job, stay in one place), the difference between travel and a vacation and the importance of journaling or writing while you are on the journey. Only by recording what you are thinking and feeling while in the midst of it can you look back later to truly understand the experience. Matt also shares his encounters with older travelers and the common fears that he hears in people 50 and older who want to travel on the cheap. Mentioned in the episode
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| Exploring Middlescence with Barbara Waxman | 25 Oct 2019 | 00:26:01 | |
Barbara Waxman, a gerontologist, author and coach, has coined the term middlescence to describe a new stage in midlife and beyond. She describes it as a transitional period often accompanied by physical changes, as well as social and economic changes. Sound familiar? Physical and hormonal changes are what we think of when we talk about adolescence. More important, Middlescence is like adolescence but with wisdom thrown in. Barbara defines it as the period from age 45 to 75ish. In her words, it is “a turning point from which adults continue to develop and grow. (It is) a life stage created by increased longevity patterns in the 21st century.” Our conversation ranges widely, from exploring the concept of Middlescence, to redefining success in this stage of life. What we talked about:
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| A Year of Wellness with Katie Tremper | 11 Oct 2019 | 00:33:02 | |
Debbie and Katie Tremper talk about the challenges of slowing down to take care of yourself. More recently, Katie, 56, has also been coping with a chronic illness, MS. Ironically, her diagnosis has helped her reconnect with herself. In this conversation Katie is remarkably open about why she is starting a Year of Wellness. After 33 years as a nonprofit executive in education, she is making a radical life change. But her story is about more than deciding to taking a grown-up gap year. Katie was diagnosed with MS - multiple sclerosis - several years ago. She talks about what it means to live with a chronic illness, all the ups and downs and frustrations. Her goal for her Year of Wellness is to reduce and slow her symptoms. She and her husband have downsized from high pressure San Francisco to the smaller quieter city of Davis, CA and she plans to take better care of herself in a multitude of ways: from cooking and eating more healthy foods to exercising to finding moments of joy in her daily life. We talk about the complexity of slowing down after a lifetime of working so hard. We also talk about dying and whether the horizon has shifted for her. After we spoke, Katie offered this revealing update via email about her Year of Wellness: "We have completed our move to Davis, where we are now the proud owners of a lovely little house in a quiet neighborhood, surrounded by lots of trees and great neighbors. A big part of my vision for my "Year of Wellness" is finding a place of peace, and I think I have found it! Although I have not been working at a job for almost 3 months, I have been very busy with the move. One big learning for me is to ASK for help when I need it. I didn't do that going into the move, and we ended up bringing a lot of boxes that I wish I'd been able to go through, sort and purge beforehand. My "bucket list," or program that I have envisioned and developed has not changed. It includes: establishing healthy daily habits to improve my mind, body and spirit; managing our finances (to include learning to live on 1/2 the income we had last year); exploring and expressing my creative side, and having fun, laughing, and experiencing joy. I've not been able to implement everything as quickly as I would have liked, but I remind myself that the changes we are going through (jobs, major move, chronic illness) are big, stressful, and exhausting at times. I also haven't begun a creative endeavor yet... I want to start writing regularly. I also haven't done much cooking or developing a better diet and nutrition plan for myself. But I'm being compassionate with myself on not being as "successful" as quickly as I imagined, and I truly believe that I will get to all of my goals, in some form or another, by the end of this calendar year. My career has been dedicated to helping other people realize their goals and dreams through education, but I have become burned out, exhausted, and spent after three decades. I've always had a hard time with self-care (God forbid I try to take care of myself first) and I realized that was part of my problem. One thing that has surprised me is that I am not having the chronic pain I was having the past couple of years in San Francisco, when I was so stressed it was making me sick. MS causes inflammation throughout the body, and I regularly had headaches, backaches, and tendonitis. I know have the time to be more present in the moment, and to really spend quality time with people and doing things I love." - Katie Tremper PHOTO: Katie posing with Debbie's husband Sam, in Baja, Mexico. Mentioned in this episode
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| Season 2 Trailer | 02 Oct 2019 | 00:02:57 | |
The term gap year symbolizes so much more than taking a time out. It is a frame for examining such topics as reinvention, a new purpose, aging with wisdom, trying new things, bucket list travel, a new approach to health and well-being, and more. All the topics that relate to living well in this stage of life. My guests in Season 2 will be a mix of inspiring individuals who are taking or have taken grown-up gap years along with well-known authors and experts on all the topics I’ve mentioned. Join us on this new season of Gap Year for Grown-Ups, and let’s dive deep... into what’s next. And as always, if you’ve got ideas for future shows or guests, email us at thegapyearpodcast@gmail.com We will publish a new episode every other Friday, starting Oct. 18, 2019. (With a week off here or there over the holidays.) Debbie Weil, your host Our Media Partners
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| Marc Freedman on How to Live Forever (It's Not What You Think) | 12 Jul 2019 | 00:34:58 | |
In the last episode of Season 1 of Gap Year For Grown-Ups, Debbie reflects on how the podcast has evolved. Initially she aimed to appeal to adults of any age seeking a timeout. But she realized that her focus was really on mid-life reinvention (50+), whether it's a gap year or a gap week, as a way to reflect, redirect, find new meaning and purpose - and find happiness. And of course that is the topic closest to her own heart. Fittingly, for this episode she invited Marc Freedman - best-selling author, renowned social entrepreneur and leading expert on the longevity revolution - to be her guest. The subject was Marc's bestselling new book, How to Live Forever, but their conversation ranges widely. They talk about aging and ageism, age segregation, the meaning of legacy, how Silicon Valley's quest for immortality is misguided, how older and younger generations are built for each other (the old want to be needed and the young want to be nurtured), how Marc is becoming an elder himself, his challenges writing his new book, and more. Marc is the founder of Encore.org, a 20-year-old ideas and innovation hub tapping the talent of those 50+ as a force for good. Encore Fellows, the Encore Prize, Gen2Gen and other programs are among Encore's practical approaches to solving the problem of the generational divide and the exploding number of those age 60+. Full disclosure: Encore.org is this podcast's newest Media Partner. Mentioned in this episode
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| Dr. Joy Dryer: Asking the Existential Questions | 28 Jun 2019 | 00:25:45 | |
Debbie sits down with Dr. Joy Dryer, a clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst who has been in private practice for 40 years. Dr. Joy (as her patients call her) works with individuals, families and couples making transitions. So the big existential questions have special interest for her: Who am I right now? Who do I want to be? And where? And with whom? These are essential gap year questions, especially for those in mid-life thinking about their marriage or other partner relationships and how they want to spend the time they have left. She has a special interest in couples and how they try to answer the big questions together. When Debbie and Sam left D.C. to take their gap year, they transitioned from essentially individual pursuits to a shared life. They found themselves spending a lot more time together and decided they needed someone to help them navigate this new shared stage in their relationship. They went to Dr. Joy looking for tools to communicate better as a mid-life couple; she was terrifically helpful. But this episode is not a therapy session. Debbie met up with Dr. Joy in her Brooklyn office to discuss mid-life and transitions, how marriages and relationships stay strong or sink, and how thinking about death can be a good thing. Mentioned in this episode Her website: Dr. Joy Dryer, PhD Dr. Joy's Acronyms:
Definition of Existential Psychotherapy (PDF) International Association for Relational Psychoanalysis and Psychotherapy at whose International Conference Dr. Joy recently presented a paper. Support this podcast:
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| On Our Bucket List: Debbie and Sam Live in France | 14 Jun 2019 | 00:32:45 | |
In this episode Debbie talks with Sam, her husband and gap year co-conspirator, about a longstanding bucket list item: to live in France for an extended period in order to practice and improve their French. Coincidentally, both have childhood ties to France. Debbie speaks semi fluently and Sam almost as well. After two weeks in Avignon, they’re back in the U.S. where they sit down to make sense of the experience. Their first week they studied in an immersion program with an excellent young teacher, Julie Gaudin. Listen to the sounds of Avignon during their second week as they wander the pedestrian-only streets of this marvelous small city, sit in cafés, and shop at the famous covered market. They also took several excursions outside the city, which meant renting a car and figuring out where to park it. They both agree you can't become a true ex-pat in only two weeks but it's enough time to adopt a daily routine and to make a friend or two at the local boulangerie and at a favorite bar serving artisanal beer. Despite their many trips to Paris and other parts of France, they continue to find French culture slightly mysterious. The solution? Go back and live in France for a year. That may or may not happen... PHOTO: Debbie and Sam in the poppy fields near Uzès. Mentioned in this episode
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| Debbie & Sam on the Acceleration of Aging: Smudged Glasses, Creaky Bodies and Before It’s Too Late | 27 Oct 2023 | 00:27:28 | |
Welcome back to Season 6! You might’ve noticed that we changed the name of the show to more accurately reflect the focus, which is to explore the transition from midlife to old age. [B]OLDER seemed a bit too general, so it's now [B]OLD AGE. Given our ageist society, it requires [b]oldness to say proudly, "I am old." This season our goal is to be even more honest and vulnerable about what it’s like as the clock ticks away. For this first episode, Debbie is joined by her husband, Sam Harrington, a popular recurring guest who is known for his dry humor. He's a retired physician and an author. They start by talking about how aging has suddenly accelerated for both of them, in their early 70s. Sam says he can see his telomeres fraying when he looks in the mirror. He notes that only a decade ago they still looked remarkably young in photos. (See photo accompanying this episode; in 2014 Debbie and Sam were hanging out in Madagascar with lemurs.) ////////// Don't miss the accompanying Behind The Scenes essay for this new episode in Debbie's [B]OLD AGE newsletter. ////////// They also talk about the long vigil of accompanying a dying parent and how that affects your own sense of old age; how health span has noticeably increased in the past 50 years; and what the stunning demographic shift to an aging society will mean. By 2030, there will be more adults over 65 than children under 18. Debbie notes the parallel between the acceleration of aging and the acceleration of global warming. At first the changes are slow and hardly noticeable. Then they happen all at once, like this past summer. But the conversation veers back to the physiological fact of aging. Sam's favorite mantra is that "80 might be the new 60, but 86 is the new 85." The current research to better understand and to slow aging may be too late to benefit them, Sam says.
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| Island Women Speak: Connection, Truth and Storytelling in Maine | 31 May 2019 | 00:19:20 | |
In this episode Debbie talks about the most surprising result of her gap year: she created, produces and directs Island Women Speak, a popular multi-generational women's storytelling event in Stonington, Maine, the small coastal town she now calls home. She calls it a gap year accomplishment because it's a new and unexpected thing she never imagined herself doing. She has coached and edited nonfiction writers for years but this was her first foray into coaching storytellers and producing a live stage event. To her surprise and delight, the recurring event has been a resounding success. The audience in this remote coastal community yearns for truth and authenticity, especially from performers everyone knows. Island Women Speak, inspired by The Moth, premiered at the Stonington Opera House in January 2018. Since then, twenty-two women, ages 20 to 95, have each performed five-minute stories that they've written and rehearsed. The stories were on themes ranging from falling in love and leaving home to coming out as gay and dealing with depression and anxiety. The most recent Island Women Speak, in January 2019, focused on the topic of standing up and speaking out. The theme was not meant to be overtly political but it was fitting following a year of #METOO revelations and coming on the heels of the record number of women elected to the U.S. House of Representatives. In the opening of the podcast, you will hear Lorraine Knowlton, 85, a lifelong resident of Deer Isle, performing her story about overcoming extreme shyness as a child. Debbie also interviews storyteller Amanda Larrabee about the impact of the event and why it has been so powerful for both performers and the audience. Mentioned in episode
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| Jeff Tidwell on Mid-Life Entrepreneurship and Work With Purpose | 17 May 2019 | 00:36:40 | |
In today's episode, Debbie interviews Jeff Tidwell, a 35-year digital veteran who has worked with big brands like eTrade and WebMD, as well as with numerous startups, on product, community, marketing and user experience strategies. He’s lived and worked in New York, San Francisco and LA. About two years ago, as he approached 60, he began to feel conscious of his age in a youth-oriented industry. That’s when he got the idea for Next For Me, an online community for those 50+ with a particular interest in meaningful work. Next For Me also sponsors real life events across the country. There are numerous other online resources that address everything else for this demographic: dating, sex, travel, planning for retirement, etc. Next For Me specifically focuses on post-50 work and purpose. Mentioned in episode Jeff's columns for Forbes.com Jeff on the launch of Next For Me Startout Growth Lab for LGBTQ entrepreneurs The Advantages Older Adults Bring to First-Time Entrepreneurship by Derek Lidow Support this podcast:
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Full disclosure: Next For Me is a sponsor of this podcast. | |||
| Four Different Decades on Transition and Reinvention (Modern Elders, Part 2) | 03 May 2019 | 00:44:40 | |
Today’s episode is Part 2 of our broadcast from Chip Conley’s Modern Elder Academy, the world's first wisdom school, located at the southernmost tip of Baja California, Mexico. Debbie spent a week at this magical place recently, along with a group of 17 other compadres. Her cohort ranged in age from 42 to 78. All were there to learn how to become a modern elder - someone who reframes a lifetime of experience in order to repurpose it for something new. A new direction, a new purpose, a reinvention. In this episode, Debbie interviews four of her compadres, representing four mid-life decades from 40s to 70s.
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| Chip Conley: Growing Wise at Modern Elder Academy | 19 Apr 2019 | 00:24:49 | |
Debbie interviews Chip Conley, New York Times best-selling author, rebel hospitality entrepreneur and now a rock star of the mid-life transition movement. After selling Joie de Vivre Hospitality, the second largest boutique hotel brand in the U.S., Chip was invited at age 52 to work for AirBnB as an advisor to the young founders. He soon found himself to be both mentor and intern; the result was his newest book, "Wisdom @ Work, The Making of a Modern Elder." In January 2018, Chip founded Modern Elder Academy, the world's first mid-life wisdom school, in Baja California, Mexico. Together they talk about MEA's mission, which is to help mid-lifers mine their mastery, repurpose it and reset their mindset for the second half or third third of their life. They also talk about the experience of attending MEA where Debbie spent a week as a student and where she interviews Chip with waves pounding in the background. Mentioned in Episode
Note: the NYT article didn't get the story quite right. MEA is for more than tech workers and it's not just a luxury retreat; it's for those 35 to 75 seeking a next step. Support this podcast:
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Full disclosure: Modern Elder Academy is a sponsor of this podcast. | |||
| Dr. Sam Harrington on Writing His First Book After Taking a Gap Year | 05 Apr 2019 | 00:33:41 | |
Debbie chats with her husband, Sam Harrington, about the experience of writing a book and about being a first-time author. Yes, writing a book was on Sam's bucket list but he never seriously considered it until their gap year when he had the time and mental space to focus on it. A practicing physician in D.C. for 31 years, he realized he had deep knowledge and a strong point of view about how the elderly should make decisions at the end of life. The result is AT PEACE: Choosing a Good Death After a Long Life (Hachette 2018). Debbie is a nonfiction writing coach and editor and she asks Sam the tough questions about writing his book. This episode will be of interest to anyone who has A BOOK on their bucket list - lots of practical tips and truth-telling. Mentioned in the episode:
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| Karen Wickre: What You Need to Know About Networking to Reinvent Your Life | 22 Mar 2019 | 00:28:23 | |
In today's episode, Debbie interviews Karen Wickre, an old friend and former editorial director at both Google and Twitter. Karen left Twitter in 2016 at age almost 65 - not to retire but to reinvent herself as a writer and consultant. She is the author of the new book Taking the Work Out of Networking. Karen shares tips and strategies on how to manage the transition from corporate life to what comes next (stay open!) and how that applies to using a gap year to find your next thing. She and Debbie also explore ageism in our modern culture and talk about the importance of having a network at any stage in life. Mentioned in the episode
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| Alasdair & Julie-Roxane on Why Money Is Not the Biggest Obstacle to a Gap Year | 08 Mar 2019 | 00:29:12 | |
Debbie interviews Julie-Roxane Krikorian and Alasdair Plambeck, a young couple living in a tiny house in southwest France whose gap year turned into real life. They unpack the money question: do you really need a lot of money to take a gap year? Debbie addresses the privilege question: is a gap year just a First World concept for those who have the luxury of dropping out of their current life? Full disclosure: J-R is producer and editor of Debbie's podcast. Mentioned in this episode: Host: Debbie Weil Producer: JR Krikorian Sponsor: Next For Me Music: Manuel Senfft | |||
| Debbie & Sam on Deciding to Take a Gap Year at Age 62 | 22 Feb 2019 | 00:22:54 | |
Debbie talks to Sam about the origins of their gap year. Sam was a successful physician in private practice in Washington DC. He explains the logistics, the timing and the deeper questions about making the life-changing decision to leave his medical practice after 31 years. Together, Debbie and Sam talk about why their gap year was not the same thing as a sabbatical or retirement. Mentioned in this episode: [Gap Year After Sixty] 1 blog Debbie’s husband and gap year co-conspirator: Sam Harrington Sam's book AT PEACE: Choosing a Good Death After a Long Life Host: Debbie Weil Producer: Julie-Roxane Krikorian Music: Manuel Senfft | |||
| Why Gap Years Are Not Wasted on the Young | 08 Feb 2019 | 00:27:10 | |
In Episode 1 Debbie explores the difference between student and grown-up gap years. She reminisces with her 88-year-old father about her first "gap year" when, as a 14-year-old, she was sent to school in France for one year. No, she was not allowed to go to Paris for a holiday break in the company of several 16-year-old boys. Then she interviews her three adult children who each took a gap year before starting university. It turns out that gap years are NOT wasted on the young. Mentioned in episode
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| Trailer | 15 Jan 2019 | 00:01:26 | |
A podcast hosted by Debbie Weil for grown-ups who believe you can step out of your default life for a gap or timeout, to find meaning and purpose, and especially when you are 50+ and figuring out what comes next. Host: Debbie Weil Special Guest: Sam Harrington Gap Year blog: Gap Year After Sixty Producer: Julie-Roxane Sponsored by Next For Me | |||
| Season 6 - Trailer | 20 Oct 2023 | 00:02:30 | |
When Debbie started this podcast almost five years ago, she was as she puts it "a mere 67." Old age seemed very far away. Now it doesn’t. So this season we’re focusing on the lived experience of old age. What’s it really like? What are the truths, both positive and negative, about moving from midlife to old age? How do you OWN being old in a society that devalues and even denigrates old people? ////////// Don't miss the BTS (behind-the-scenes) for every episode in Debbie's [B]OLD AGE newsletter. ////////// We’ll still talk about things like finding purpose and redefining retirement. But we’ll also look at the upside of slowing down; for example, "being" vs. "doing" when you’ve been driven by ambition your whole life. The point is to bring you honest and vulnerable dispatches of the ordinary and the profound. And so this little tweak in the name: it’s now the [B]OLD AGE podcast because it takes courage and [b]oldness to move gracefully from midlife into old age. We hope what we talk about here will help you on your own transition into [b]old age, wherever you are now. Maybe you're young and worrying about becoming middle-aged. Or you're in midlife and looking ahead. As always, send comments or questions to thebolderpodcast@gmail.com. And check out Debbie's new [B]OLD AGE newsletter where you can get the BTS (behind-the-scenes) on each episode of the podcast, read her personal essays, get writing tips, and more. You can leave your comments on every Substack post. Debbie promises to respond. Connect with Debbie:
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| Debbie & Sam Wrap Up Season 5: Anniversaries, Unexpected Death, God, Grandchildren, and More. | 21 Jul 2023 | 00:28:49 | |
Today, Debbie brings her husband Sam Harrington back on the show to wrap up another [B]OLDER season. You'll hear their 11-year-old granddaughter Ruthie talking about her recent trip with them to the Swiss Alps. Definitely a high point of the season and of the past year. A lot has happened during Season 5 of [B]OLDER: Debbie and Sam celebrated their 50th anniversary while they were in San Miguel de Allende in Mexico. Then, right after that, Debbie's 92-year-old mother died unexpectedly, prompting a lot of memories, much appreciation, and a blunt reminder of life’s finitude. We re-ran episodes with some of our most popular guests who talked about psychedelic therapy and about Covid’s place in the history of plagues.
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In Season 5 Debbie talked to new guests about cellular research on aging, about helping elderly parents plan ahead, what UNretirement is really like, and one of her all-time favorite interviews: a conversation with famed New York Times health columnist Jane Brody about what she learned from a half century at the Times. And finally, renowned writer and speaker Jonathan Merritt eloquently explained God and religion to Debbie, a non-church person. In this wrap-up you’ll hear Sam - hopefully not slurping his coffee but maybe a little - and teasing Debbie about "jumping right in." (She likes that podcast expression; he does not.) This is the finale of Season 5 of the [B]OLDER podcast. Have a great summer, thank you for listening, and we’ll be back in the fall. In the meantime, find Debbie on Substack where she writes about what it's really like to grow old(er)?
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| Jonathan Merritt on Personal Transformation and the Complicated Intersection of Faith and Culture | 07 Jul 2023 | 00:43:16 | |
Today, Debbie speaks to Jonathan Merritt, one of America’s most renowned writers on faith and culture. Debbie met Jonathan in the hot tub in Baja Mexico, but don’t get the wrong idea. They were both in Baja to attend a weeklong workshop organized by Modern Elder Academy. And as you’ll hear in this episode, "change and transformation" were very much on the agenda. You may have heard her talk about MEA. It’s billed as a midlife wisdom school whose core mission is to shift our negative mindset about aging. MEA is also a little bit of paradise. The campus, bursting with pink bougainvillea, sits on a wide, surf-pounded beach near Todos Santos, MX, just north of Cabo.
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Debbie and Jonathan were part of a group of about 20 in a recent workshop, pondering how to use sensory experience in the here and now to map out their futures. Debbie was intrigued with Jonathan’s thoughtful comments. She was also drawn to his Atlanta accent which she couldn’t quite place at first but which she recognized. She has a bunch of Georgia cousins. In the hot tub, Jonathan revealed a bit about why he had flown from New York to spend a week at MEA. She wanted to find out more so she invited him onto the show. And she wanted him to explain things to her, a non church-person. Jonathan is best known as a writer on the complicated intersection of faith and culture — as it applies to LGBTQ intolerance and evangelicalism — and much more. The son of an evangelical leader and a former pastor himself, Jonathan was outed as gay a decade ago. He moved to New York City and has since become an award-winning contributor to The Atlantic, a senior columnist for Religion News Service; has authored several books (including the critically-acclaimed How to Speak God From Scratch); has been interviewed on ABC, CBS, CNN, MSNBC, Fox News, NPR and PBS; is a literary agent; has ghostwritten or collaborated on more than 50 books (with several titles landing on the NYTimes, USA Today and Wall Street Journal bestseller lists); speaks and teaches at colleges, conferences and churches; has just finished writing his first children’s book; and is writing a TV series about religion and popular culture. Oh, and he just turned 40. Despite — or perhaps because of — his achievements, Jonathan is working on a transformation, his own “what’s next.” He’s an old soul, he tells Debbie, so he’s approaching this with intentionality; his week at MEA was just one step. On the podcast they talk about:
As Debbie tells Jonathan, she could listen to him explain things all day — especially as they relate to religion, church, community, identity, intolerance and more. And yes, it's okay to go to church, he told her. Even if you don't believe in God, per se. She loved this conversation and hopes you will too.
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| Karen Wickre on Aging in Place As a Singleton After a Stellar Tech Career | 23 Jun 2023 | 00:33:00 | |
Debbie brings her friend Karen Wickre back on the show to talk about "aging in place" and other things, including being a singleton in her 70s. They met over 20 years ago when Debbie interviewed Karen, who was editor of Google’s blog, for Debbie's book, The Corporate Blogging Book. Not surprisingly, Google was an early adopter of this new form of communication. They've stayed in touch ever since. Karen had a stellar career in tech, working at Google and then at Twitter. She retired when she was 65 (she didn’t call it “retirement” back then) and is now an editorial consultant. She lives alone in San Francisco where she's owned her apartment for over 20 years. Now that she’s completed a strategically-planned renovation, she plans to stay there to "age in place." She is the author of Taking the Work Out of Networking: Your Guide to Making and Keeping Great Connections. They talk about the power of networking, the importance of connections later in life, especially if you are a solo ager, planning ahead if you want to age in place, and what the definition of home is - beyond location - and how that might change as you grow older. Debbie shares her thoughts about what and where home is - as she looks ahead. Mentioned in this episode or useful:
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| Best Of: Dr. Bree Johnston on Psilocybin Trips and the Growing Acceptance of Psychedelic Therapy | 09 Jun 2023 | 00:47:05 | |
Debbie talks with Dr. Bree Johnston, a geriatrician and palliative care physician in practice for 35 years who is also certified in psychedelic therapies. This is a re-airing of an episode published one year ago. The topic of psychedelic therapy has gone mainstream in the past several years and especially in the past year. In the year since Debbie and Dr. Bree spoke, the use of psilocybin, MDMA and other psychedelics as therapy for addiction, depression and to ease fear of death has been increasingly in the news. The use of psilocybin is now legal or decriminalized in a handful of states in addition to Oregon. Dr. Bree is an especially clear speaker and talks openly about the benefits of her own psilocybin trips. She tells us she wishes she could prescribe them for her elderly patients who are anxious about dying. She explains everything you might want to know about different psychedelics, what their effects are, what to be wary of and more. As to how this topic fits into aging and reinvention, Debbie says were she to receive a fatal diagnosis from cancer or another disease, she's pretty sure she would seek a guided psilocybin trip to ease fear of dying. UPDATE on legal status of psychedelics
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| Sari Botton on Oldster Magazine and the Hot Topic of Growing Old | 26 May 2023 | 00:32:02 | |
Debbie talks to the incomparably prolific writer and editor Sari Botton about her popular online Oldster Magazine and how the topic of growing old touches a nerve with everyone from Millennials to GenXers (she is 57) to Boomers. Sari Botton publishes three different newsletters on Substack and she’s got over 1,500 paying subscribers. So growing old is definitely a hot topic - and not just for Boomers in their 60s and 70s. Her approach to aging is interesting; in fact, she’s been obsessed with growing older since she turned 10 and entered double digits. And she says she still feels 10 or 11 inside her head. She describes aging as traveling through time in a human body—of any gender, at every phase of life. Thus Oldster Magazine is about the experience of getting older and what that means at different junctures. In this episode Sari and Debbie talk about ageism (what it is and isn’t); Sari's experiences of growing older (no more wooden clogs for her); and the close to 100 interviews she's done on Oldster about growing older (and what we can learn from them). They also talk about Martha Stewart’s recent Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Cover. Does it make the point that you can look good in a swimsuit at any age (Martha is 81)? That age doesn’t matter?? Or is this just Martha Stewart being Martha Stewart? They also delve into Sari's new skincare routine (yes, a nod to getting older) and why birthday parties are so important to her. Sari is the author of the memoir in essays, And You May Find Yourself...Confessions of a Late-Blooming Gen-X Weirdo and was a contributing editor and columnist at Catapult, and the former Essays Editor for Longreads. She edited the bestselling anthologies Goodbye to All That: Writers on Loving and Leaving NewYork and Never Can Say Goodbye: Writers on Their Unshakable Love for New York. She teaches creative nonfiction at Bay Path University and Kingston Writers' Studio. She publishes Oldster Magazine, Memoir Land, and Adventures in Journalism. She is the Writer in Residence in the creative writing department of SUNY New Paltz for Spring, 2023.
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| Abigail Thomas on Life at 81: Liquid Moments, Memory, French Toast and Writing | 12 May 2023 | 00:38:33 | |
Today, Debbie speaks with bestselling author Abigail Thomas whom Stephen King calls “the Emily Dickinson of memoirists." Her new memoir, titled "Still Life at Eighty," is a series of loosely connected essays on the topic of aging. But it's so much more than that. Abby, as she insisted that Debbie call her, is funny and frank and profane as she talks about the good and the bad of aging. Yes, there are aches and pains. No, she doesn't mind being old. In fact, she loves it. She no longer cares what people think of her and - just for the record - she is not afraid of death. As she puts it: "Please God, let there be no afterlife." In this conversation she and Debbie talk about her writing (Debbie finds it "transcendent"), her relationship to time and memories, her longterm friendship with literary agent Chuck Verrill (who died in early 2022), and why she loves working with clay. Mentioned in this episode or useful:
"STILL LIFE AT EIGHTY is a little jewel box of a book, full of epiphanies that are comforting and merciless in the gentlest possible way. Both a series of meditations and a user’s manual about growing old, I was amazed by its clarity... Even the title, with its deliberate ambiguity, is a very cool thing." — Stephen King PHOTO CREDIT: Jennifer Waddell
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| Best Of: Plague Expert Nicholas Christakis on Why the Pandemic Will End in 2024 | 28 Apr 2023 | 00:55:56 | |
Today, Debbie re-runs the single most popular of 100+ episodes of [B]OLDER. Exactly two years ago, in the spring of 2021, she asked plague expert Nicholas Christakis, a distinguished Yale professor and author, the burning question: when will the COVID-19 pandemic end? His answer: 2024. It startled her and burst her bubble of optimism. Vaccines were widely available by then and it seemed like the beginning of the end. Surely he was exaggerating how long it would take for the COVID pandemic to wind down? No, it was only the end of the beginning, he told her. Today that makes sense. And of course, it was prescient. Tune into a re-run of one of the most fascinating episodes of [B]OLDER. (Note that Debbie refers to it as The Gap Year Podcast, the name she gave the podcast during the height of the pandemic. It's now the [B]OLDER podcast. Same podcast; different name.) PHOTO CREDIT: Evan Mann
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SHOW NOTES from the original interview with Nicholas Christakis (May 7, 2021) Nicholas Christakis, MD, PhD, MPH, and a Sterling Professor at Yale, has been named to TIME magazine’s list of the 100 Most Influential People in the World. His fluency in explaining the intertwined science, epidemiology, psychology, sociology and history of pandemics - and his sense of humor - make this a compelling episode.
Debbie asks him point blank: when is the next pandemic? The answer is unnerving – sooner than you might think.
About Nicholas Christakis
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| Patty Ivey on Getting Breast Cancer at Age 70 and How It’s Changing What She Will Give Back to the World | 19 Apr 2024 | 00:39:08 | |
Today Debbie talks to Patty Ivey about life changes and opportunities opening up for her after being diagnosed with and treated for breast cancer last year. Inspiring doesn’t really cover it as a way to describe Patty. Neither does [b]old, as in [B]OLD AGE. Patty and Debbie go back at least 15 years, when Debbie was a regular at Patty's Down Dog yoga studio in DC. It was always special when Patty, the owner, taught a class. Her classes were different. They offered all the benefits that practicing yoga offers beyond what happens on the mat; with Patty teaching, the class was mind-expanding. She made yoga open up new possibilities for how to live. So when Debbie saw Patty posting beautiful, bald photos of herself on her LinkedIn page, she immediately got in touch to find out how she was doing. As Patty explains it, she is using life principles from yoga, which include leaving room for what we don’t know and focusing on something bigger than ourselves, as she looks ahead. She acknowledges an identity shift that has come with cancer. Some older version of herself is no longer there, but she's okay with that. Like most women, Debbie is terrified of getting breast cancer, but with Patty as a guide (she’s also a mentor and a life coach as well as being a serial entrepreneur), it seems there could be an upside. We hope you are as inspired by this conversation as Debbie was.
////////// Don't miss the Behind The Scenes for every podcast episode in Debbie's [B]OLD AGE newsletter on Substack. //////////
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| One Year Later: Richard Eisenberg on the Unretired Life | 14 Apr 2023 | 00:35:41 | |
Debbie brings veteran journalist and prolific freelance writer Richard Eisenberg back on the podcast one year after he "unretired" from full-time work as managing editor of Next Avenue. When they spoke a year ago, he was just embarking on his new life. Today, he reflects on surprises, what he's learned, what he's working on, and more. Richard defines unretirement as a mixture of paid and unpaid work, as well as the opportunity to delve into unexplored passions, travel, volunteer, and spend more time with family. He tells Debbie that the biggest surprise so far is how challenging it has been to adjust to a wide-open schedule on his calendar. He has lots of days with a full plate but the blank days are discomfiting. Debbie suggests that he cheat and put "take a walk" or "pick up the dry cleaning" on his Apple calendar. He reveals that he much prefers a paper calendar and carries one around with him, with his appointments entered, changed, and scratched off. He and Debbie also discuss ageism, the ethics of writing with help from AI (aka Chat GPT), and fraudulent Medicare Advantage marketing. They also talk about the increasing number of age-friendly jobs and why older workers (who value flexibility, autonomy, etc.) are NOT getting them. This is a great conversation from a down-to-earth practitioner of the art of unretirement. You'll find links to some of his recent articles in the show notes below. All are about issues related to retirement and aging.
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| 100th Episode: Guy Kawasaki on ChatGPT, Remarkable People & Why Podcasting Is His Ikigai | 31 Mar 2023 | 00:38:40 | |
Debbie brings back a favorite recurring guest, Silicon Valley legend Guy Kawasaki, to talk about legacy, aging, ChatGPT, why podcasting is his "ikigai," and more — and to celebrate the 100th episode of [B]OLDER. Guy is the original Apple evangelist, a prolific author, a surfer (at age 68), and perhaps most importantly, a podcaster. Guy is the creator and host of the popular Remarkable People podcast. Podcasting is his ikigai (a Japanese expression meaning reason for being or purpose) and Remarkable People is his best work, he says. He and Debbie discuss ChatGPT, the natural language processing tool driven by AI that everyone is talking about. Guy offers ways he is using ChatGPT, including: - To write a first draft of a podcast intro for a guest - To write form letters to an insurance company (he settled his claim favorably!) - To write the first draft of his new book (based on his podcast). He is using ChatGPT as a more powerful thesaurus and in other ways. Listen to the episode for more tips and to hear how Guy makes Debbie laugh - and think.
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| Expat Bonnie Lee Black on the Pros (& Very Few Cons) of Retiring to San Miguel de Allende | 17 Mar 2023 | 00:32:14 | |
Debbie Weil talks to Bonnie Lee Black, an author and blogger who retired in her 70s to affordable and magical San Miguel de Allende in Mexico. SMA, as it's called, has become a haven for expat retirees, especially single older women. It has been named (three times in a row) the Best Small City in the World by Condé Nast Traveler. And it's a UNESCO World Heritage Site. Debbie and her husband Sam spent three weeks there in February '23 and were charmed by the Spanish colonial architecture, the cobblestone streets, the tiny shops, the rooftop restaurants, the perfect weather, and of course the pink wedding cake cathedral, referred to as the Parroquia, in the main square. While they are not seriously considering retiring there, Debbie was intrigued by Bonnie's blog and her experiences as a permanente (permanent resident). Bonnie's blog post titled Watch Your Step (about the dangerously uneven sidewalks) caught Debbie's attention so she reached out to invite her onto the podcast. They subsequently became friends. Bonnie has been a professional writer and editor for more than 40 years (she's the author of five books), was an educator in the U.S., and now writes a popular weekly blog, the WOW Factor. Bonnie gives Debbie an insider's perspective on living full time in this beautiful place. First among the many pros is the low cost of living, making SMA affordable for single women living on a fixed income. And then there's the weather (yes, hard to overstate how perfect it is), the absence of ageism, the kindness of the people, the endless number of volunteer opportunities and classes to take and more. And she shares the one con for older retirees that Debbie noticed immediately upon arriving: those sidewalks. Bonnie also interviewed Debbie as part of her series on WOW (wise older women).
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| Star Bradbury on How to Successfully Navigate the Care of Elderly Parents | 03 Mar 2023 | 00:25:36 | |
Debbie talks to eldercare expert Star Bradbury about some of the most important topics in her comprehensive new book, Successfully Navigating Your Parents' Senior Years: Critical Information to Maximize Their Independence and Make Sure They Get the Care They Need (BenBella Books, March 21, 2023). Soon after they spoke, Debbie's 92-year-old mother died unexpectedly, making the conversation especially timely. Star's book is a compendium of how to plan and care for an elderly parent - or your own care many years down the road. She covers every topic you could think of including different types of assisted living and home care, assistive robots for seniors (yes, it's a thing), living wills and advance directives, hospice and death doulas, cremation and green burials, and much more. "Expect the unexpected" is part of her message. And In my family's case, we were unprepared. We were stunned when our mom died. We had expected our dad to go first. The book is the result of her 25 years of experience in senior healthcare and senior living and her answer to the overwhelming complexity of options and situations when it comes to aging parents. Star is also speaking to those of us in our 60s and 70s (and younger) who should be looking at planning for what she calls “post-retirement."
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| Debbie & Julie-Roxane on Different Styles of Decision-Making No Matter Your Age | 17 Feb 2023 | 00:29:01 | |
Today, Debbie brings her producer and friend Julie-Roxane back on the podcast to talk about decision-making. When you plan ahead 10, 15 or 20 years how do you make the right decisions knowing the future is always uncertain? Julie-Roxane, 30, and Debbie, 71, discuss the challenges of decision-making, whether it’s deciding to have children or planning for old age. They talk about the concept of maximiser vs. satisficer, two different approaches to decision-making. (Can you guess which is more effective?) They end by reversing roles and giving each other advice about big upcoming decisions. Tune in for a rich intergenerational conversation.
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| Debbie & Sam on 50 Years of Marriage: Gratitude, Celebration... and Grief | 03 Feb 2023 | 00:29:30 | |
Debbie brings her favorite recurring guest, husband Sam Harrington, back onto the show. This is a special episode because they are celebrating 50 years of marriage today, Feb. 3, 2023. They were married a half century ago, in 1973. It was truly another age, pre-Internet and so much more. They were both 21. That's an astonishing fact: they were obviously too young to get married. But they did and the marriage has lasted. They acknowledge how lucky they are and how much they have to be grateful for. They have six grandchildren, they like hanging out together, and Sam is still teasing Debbie and making her laugh. They talk about the trivial and the existential and how it's okay to feel grief when they look back at their youthful passion and how young and beautiful they were. And how now is a time to think about their mortality and to try and enjoy each present moment. Things do change in a long marriage, as you’ll hear. One thing doesn’t, however. As always, Debbie and Sam disagree about a lot of things. "But that's all good..." A phrase they've adopted after watching W1A, a very funny British TV series starring Hugh Bonneville. Mentioned in this episode or useful:
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| Andrew Steele on Research at the Cellular Level That Could Slow Aging | 20 Jan 2023 | 00:44:21 | |
Today Debbie tackles the topic of aging (better? longer??) with Andrew Steele, an ebullient British scientist, writer and author of Ageless: The New Science of Getting Older Without Getting Old. After earning a PhD in physics from Oxford, Andrew decided that aging - not cancer or other diseases - was the single most important scientific challenge of our time. Why? Because of the suffering that goes along with old age. So he switched fields to biogerontology, the study of the processes of aging at the cellular level. Andrew, 37, doesn’t advocate for immortality. As he puts it: “It’s not about extending lifespan, but rather healthspan." His interest, he maintains, is in helping humans stay healthier longer. Debbie asks Andrew what the most important biological aging processes are. He responds with a clear explanation of cell biology as it relates to aging: from senescent cells and cellular exhaustion to your epigenetic age, and more. And he explains that some of these genes and processes can be manipulated to slow or possibly reverse aging - at least, so far, in worms and mice. Andrew is exuberant and makes everything understandable.
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| Jane Brody on Life and Lessons from a Half Century at The New York Times | 06 Jan 2023 | 00:36:32 | |
Today, Debbie talks to Jane Brody, the renowned New York Times columnist who until last year wrote the popular weekly Personal Health column. In this episode, she reflects on her 57-year career at the Times. They talk about how she moved from biochemistry to journalism and how she got hired by the Times at age 24. Instead of wilting under discouraging words from the editor who was interviewing her for a job, she responded, "Mr. Rosenthal, if I didn't think I could do this job, I wouldn't be here." Abe Rosenthal was the managing editor and later the legendary executive editor of The New York Times. Jane applied her no-nonsense style to reporting, writing with a distinctive mix of personal anecdotes, interviews with experts and scientific fact. She started the Personal Health column in 1976 (right when Debbie was starting work as a reporter). She invented the topic of personal health with the goal of teaching readers how to lead better, healthier lives. The column covered everything from common diseases to cancers to death and dying, as well as wellness, exercise, and nutrition. Jane talks about what it was like to be a woman in an almost all-male newsroom and how squeamish editors wouldn’t let her use the words sexual intercourse or penis. She changed that. She also tells us why she decided to retire at age 80 and what her new retired life looks like. Debbie hopes you'll enjoy listening to this episode as much as she did recording it. Jane Brody does not disappoint on the topic of making the most of growing older.
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| Clementina Esposito on Memoir Writing, the Ugly Truth, and the Impact of the Spoken Word | 16 Dec 2022 | 00:36:30 | |
Debbie Weil talks to friend and exceptional writing teacher Clementina Esposito about memoir, the difficulty of sharing ugly truths, and why making meaning through writing matters. Clementina is founder of the Clementina Collective, a collaborative created to help entrepreneurs and visionary leaders advance their causes and their careers through writing and speaking. In Clementina's words: "No one writes alone, everyone values the power of a well-told story, and ugly truths become beautiful in the end.” Debbie met Clementina a half dozen years ago when Clementina coached her in a public speaking program. They've been friends ever since. Clementina has been teaching memoir writing to a group of older students (60s to 80s). She and Debbie discuss the importance of reading aloud - of performing - what you’ve written and how maybe that should be a goal instead of publication. Reading out loud builds community and intimacy. They also talk about the difficulty and challenge of finding your voice and speaking your truth and sharing it with others – especially if you think it’s an ugly truth. And they conclude by agreeing that anyone can be a writer. Even if you doubt yourself, sharing your writing is how you make meaning of your life... and help your readers do the same.
Mentioned in this episode:
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| Ayse Birsel on How to Apply Design Thinking to a Longer Life | 02 Dec 2022 | 00:34:17 | |
Today Debbie talks with Ayse Birsel. She’s an award-winning industrial designer whose firm has designed hundreds of products for brand name companies like Herman Miller, Ikea and Target. And that includes a product you may have sat on: a toilet seat. She’s taken her industrial design methodology, broken it down, simplified it, made it fun and inviting… and turned it into a process for life design. The result is her second and newest book: Design the Long Life You Love: A Step-by-Step Guide to Love, Purpose, Well-Being, and Friendship. One of her key points is that life, just like a design problem, is full of constraints -- time, money, age, location, and circumstances. And if you're an older adult reimagining your last chapter, you know what your final "constraint" is. You can’t have everything, so you have to be creative. You have to think like a designer. You have to get ideas and beliefs out of your head and down onto paper and cultivate an attitude of playfulness and optimism - if you want to change. So the book is filled with Ayse’s whimsical drawings, and her step-by-step maps: for how to make new friends, how to reimagine work, how to create meaning, how to separate achievement from success, how to check your well-being index, and more. One of Debbie's favorite exercises: how to reconcile yourself to unresolved issues. Make a list, Ayse says, pick three, personify them and write them a letter and then let them go. Ayse calls her method deconstruction / reconstruction. That means deconstruct your life, do a lot of exploring through scribbling and list-making and drawing, and then reconstruct the life you want. Her new book is jammed with exercises and lists and interviews with her favorite mentors. Ayse says you have to draw (even if you think you can’t) every day to rev up your creative brain. Debbie's advance copy is littered with yellow sticky notes as well as scribbles and arrows. She can't draw but is trying anyway.
Mentioned in this episode or useful:
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| Lyn Slater on How To Be Old and Why She Is No Longer a Fashion Influencer | 29 Mar 2024 | 00:38:41 | |
Debbie speaks with Lyn Slater, a writer and activist and former social media influencer. She spent her mid-60s becoming an icon of fashion, racking up nearly 800,000 Instagram followers, representing huge brands like Ilia Beauty, Kate Spade, Moncler, and Visa (among many others), speaking on fashion panels, and in general living a very public life. Her memoir, “How to Be Old: Lessons in Living Boldly From the Accidental Icon" is just out. But… and there’s a big BUT, Lyn has given up that identity and is now, at 70, a writer and hands-on grandmother. She has renounced social media and no longer offers fashion or style tips. In this episode she tells Debbie that she was unhappy at the peak of her influencer career, what she learned from her mother’s decline and death, and how we have to tell the truth about old age to young women. ////////// Don't miss the Behind The Scenes for every episode in Debbie's [B]OLD AGE newsletter. ////////// Mentioned in this episode or useful:
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| Joan Price on the Joys of (and Differences in) Senior Sex | 18 Nov 2022 | 00:31:36 | |
Today Debbie talks about a topic that interests us all, no matter our age… sex. Given the focus of the podcast, she decided to go right to a senior sexspert, Joan Price, for a very frank conversation about all things related to, well, senior sex. Joan, who is 79, has legions of followers on her blog, for her books, DVDs and webinars. She was quoted in a New York Times Magazine cover story this year and now gets so many requests for podcast interviews that she mostly turns them down. She agreed to come on [B]OLDER after listening to the recent episode with nonagenarian author Hilma Wolitzer (Season 4, Episode 20) about writing through grief. Joan calls herself an "advocate for ageless sexuality.” The media calls her “the woman leading a sex revolution for seniors” and, her favorite, "a wrinkly sex kitten." Debbie and Joan talk about why senior sex is an embarrassing subject but, more importantly, they talk about how to expand our definition of sex and how to adjust our relationship to body image as we age. They get right into it. No words are off limits so they talk about orgasms and sex toys and more. Joan explains the different types of desire (and why that’s important to understand as you get older). After this episode we promise that you’ll know what PIV stands for... if you don’t already. Bottom line, Joan's message is that yes, sex is different after 60 or 70 or 80… but in some ways, she says, it’s better. Joan is funny as well as frank. "Spicy” is one of her favorite words. You’ll definitely want to check out her website joanprice.com for tons of resources.
Mentioned in this episode or useful:
Get the inside skinny on every episode of [B]OLDER: Subscribe to Debbie’s newsletter for the inside story about every episode. You will also get her 34-page writing guide: https://bitly.com/debbie-free-guide.
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| Veteran Blogger Shel Israel on Reinvention, Writing, and Moving Across Country at 78 | 04 Nov 2022 | 00:32:58 | |
Today’s episode was a chance for Debbie to reconnect with an old friend, Shel Israel, whom she met about 20 years ago… in the blogosphere. Yes, there really was a blogosphere in the early 2000's. Shel and Debbie and a bunch of others were pioneers and they all knew each other. They'd meet at conferences and promote each other’s blogs AND explain blogging to everyone else. In early 2006, Shel co-authored perhaps the first serious book about business blogging. And Debbie wrote the second one, published later that same year. Shel's book has a much sexier title, Naked Conversations. Debbie's is The Corporate Blogging Book. Debbie and Shel talk about his decision to leave California after 50 years and move across country to Florida, just in time for Hurricane Ian. Debbie asks how he fared and how he plans to make friends and become part of his new community in St. Petersburg. He’s got some surprising answers. As a tech pioneer and an optimist, he considers everyone he meets on social media to be a friend. He’s using Facebook to connect and to create a new network. And he’s even got a spreadsheet with 13 prospects on it… 13 prospective friends, that is. This is an open and honest conversation which, not coincidentally, is the hallmark of good blogging. They talk about how important writing is to Shel, why he left a lucrative career in PR. and how he approaches tech-business ghostwriting and other projects.
Mentioned in this episode or useful:
Get the inside skinny on every episode of [B]OLDER: Subscribe to Debbie’s newsletter for the inside story about every episode. You will also get her 34-page writing guide: https://bitly.com/debbie-free-guide.
Request from Debbie: If you've been enjoying the podcast, please take a moment to leave a short review on Apple Podcasts. It really makes a difference in attracting new listeners.
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| Debbie & Sam Explore Iceland with Two Grandchildren | 21 Oct 2022 | 00:32:49 | |
Welcome to Season 5 of [B]OLDER where Debbie Weil talks about "making the most of growing older," both the good and the not-so-great parts of aging. But today it’s all GOOD. Becoming a grandparent is something many people look forward to. Debbie and her husband, Sam Harrington, are lucky enough to have six grandchildren thus far. In this episode she chats with Sam (aka "Ba"), to debrief their trip to Iceland this past summer with two grandchildren. They talk about why they chose Iceland, and which grandchildren they took with them - and why - and how Dorothea and Lius fared as fellow travelers with their grandparents. They both remark on the stunning natural wonders of Iceland, most notably the glaciers, the volcanic lava fields, and the waterfalls. They also reflect on their experience as grandparents and how it’s (mostly) different from being a parent. This is a leisurely conversation and perhaps most useful if you have grandchildren or if you have ever considered traveling to Iceland. No matter why you’re listening, be sure to get to the last few seconds… for a nice surprise.
Subscribe to Debbie's newsletter for the inside story about every episode. You will also get her free 34-page writing guide: https://bitly.com/debbie-free-guide. If you've been enjoying the podcast, please take a moment to leave a short review on Apple Podcasts. It really makes a difference in attracting new listeners.
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| Season 5 - Trailer | 14 Oct 2022 | 00:01:44 | |
[B]older is back for season 5. And we're back at it: unraveling what it means to make the most of growing older. Each episode is a frank 30-minute conversation with a best-selling author, expert, or exceptional individual on a topic related to aging. For host Debbie Weil, 70, it’s a real-time exploration of growing old. But don’t worry; she’s not embracing old age just yet. She’s still (boldly) figuring things out. She asks the hard questions about how to use this later stage of life to create, to find meaning, and to make a difference. In the podcast Debbie delves into all the current topics related to aging: the unretired life, reinventing work, slowing down, aging better, ageism, living your purpose, grownup gap years, grandparenting, intergenerational collaboration, effects of the pandemic, grief and widowhood, surviving cancer, and more. As well as other stuff that piques her interest; for example, the craft of writing. Her husband, physician author Sam Harrington, is a popular recurring guest. The Debbie & Sam shows feature his dry humor and medical expertise. Join us for another great season diving into what it means to be growing [b]older!
Get the inside skinny on every episode of [B]OLDER: Subscribe to Debbie’s newsletter for the inside story about every episode. You will also get her 34-page writing guide: https://bitly.com/debbie-free-guide.
Request from Debbie: If you've been enjoying the podcast, please take a moment to leave a short review on Apple Podcasts. It really makes a difference in attracting new listeners.
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| Debbie & Sam Wrap Up Season 4 | 08 Jul 2022 | 00:30:10 | |
Debbie Weil brings her husband Sam Harrington back on the show for a dose of his dry humor and to wrap up Season 4. Sam shares some of his favorite episodes (see below) and they discuss several topics in the news: Medical Aid In Dying and the 100-year life. If you've listened to Sam in previous episodes, you can probably guess what he thinks about living to 100. Sam is a retired physician; friends and family affectionately call him Dr. Death. They also talk about grandparenting and what you can expect from Season 5. Sam's favorite episodes from Season 4
Mentioned in this episode:
Previous episodes featuring host Debbie Weil and her husband Sam Harrington:
Note from Debbie If you've been enjoying the podcast, please consider leaving a short review on Apple Podcasts. It takes less than two minutes and it really makes a difference. It makes me feel loved and it also attracts new listeners. Subscribe to my newsletter and get my free writing guide: https://bitly.com/debbie-free-guide.
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| Hilma Wolitzer, 92, on Writing Through Grief and Turning Domestic Life Into Art | 01 Jul 2022 | 00:42:41 | |
Today, Debbie talks to writer and novelist Hilma Wolitzer, age 92. She’s just published a new book of short stories titled "Today a Woman Went Mad in the Supermarket." So yes, this is someone who is "making the most of growing older." Hilma's stories of sharply observed domestic life were published in the Saturday Evening Post and Esquire in the 1960s and 1970s. She has taught writing at the Bread Loaf Writers' Conference, the Iowa Writers' Workshop, NYU, and Columbia. She's also the author of nine novels and the recipient of national awards and fellowships. Her husband of almost 70 years died of COVID in the first months of the pandemic. It was as if he vanished, she told Debbie. She and her husband Morty both got Covid in April of 2020. They were taken to separate hospitals in New York City. She never got to say good-bye. He died two days before she was released from the hospital and went home to her apartment. As she tells Debbie on the podcast: "There were his slippers next to the bed. There was a pair of his drugstore eyeglasses. He seemed to have vanished and that was the sense I tried to depict in (the final) story (of her new book). Disappearance rather than dying." She was encouraged to write through her grief, and to write this story and add it to a new collection, by her daughters: New York Times bestselling novelist Meg Wolitzer and artist Nancy Wolitzer. She titled the new story, "The Great Escape." It is as diamond sharp and perfect - and funny - as her earlier writing. There's even sex.
Note from Debbie If you've been enjoying the podcast, please consider leaving a short review on Apple Podcasts. It takes less than two minutes and it really makes a difference. It makes me feel loved and it also attracts new listeners. Subscribe to my newsletter and get my free writing guide: https://bitly.com/debbie-free-guide.
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We are looking for a sponsor or a podcast network If you are interested in reaching a smart and thoughtful audience of midlife, and older, listeners, contact Debbie Weil.
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