Explore every episode of the podcast Bodies Behind The Bus
| Title | Pub. Date | Duration | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Jamie's Story / YWAM / Canada | 25 Sep 2026 | 01:22:06 | |
Jamie joins Youth With A Mission (YWAM) at 17 and stays 25 years, from 1994 to 2020. Jamie describes how YWAM's Founders Circle holds authority without accountability. After the Pulse nightclub shooting, Jamie, speaks out publicly as an affirming Christian. He recounts two years of meetings with international leaders and a talk in which founder Loren Cunningham tells of praying judgment on a man who died the next day. Jamie shares why he and his wife walk away, what they lose, and the community they have now. | |||
| Skyla's Story / YWAM Kona, HI | 17 Sep 2026 | 01:40:22 | |
Skyla shares her story of serving on a team called End Bible Poverty Now at Youth With A Mission's (YWAM) Kona campus in Hawaii, where she pushed leadership to support outreach to deaf communities. When she raised the issue, she was accused of being rude for crying and told she needed more discipleship. Skyla describes being tested, gaslit, and slowly pushed off her team, all while a separate clergy sexual abuse case was being quietly managed on campus. After she was let go, campus security posted false claims about her that stayed up for months. Today, Skyla shares her story to give voice to the many others harmed by YWAM Kona. If her story resonates with you, you can reach her at skylaspeaksout@gmail.com. | |||
| Shelby's Story / YWAM / Switzerland / Pt. 2 | 11 Sep 2026 | 01:37:06 | |
Shelby returns to finish her story of leaving Youth With A Mission (YWAM) after almost 20 years. Two friends she trusted rise to lead her base, and when she raises concerns about how they treat people, she is accused of attacking them. She is pushed off a program she built, then invited onto their leadership team to quiet her down instead. She takes a sabbatical during the pandemic and starts naming what happened to her as spiritual abuse. When her husband tries to renew the farm lease his family has held for decades, the same leaders try to hold it hostage until she agrees to reconcile with them. She reports them to top YWAM leadership and learns she is one of many victims, then runs into her alleged abusers at a global conference and on the flight home. She shares her full story with local leaders, watches YWAM avoid the word abuse, and is later blacklisted after her team is pressured to remove her from a course she was set to lead. She ends by speaking directly to YWAM leaders and to anyone still inside the organization. | |||
| Shelby's Story / YWAM / Switzerland / Pt. 1 | 10 Sep 2026 | 01:31:13 | |
Shelby joins us to share her story of almost 20 years with Youth With A Mission (YWAM), a Christian missions group with bases in nearly every country. She signs up at 24 to earn a counseling degree, hoping to help missionaries get better care. Instead, she is pushed to share painful secrets with strangers, watches a visiting speaker ask young women to sit on his lap for healing, and lives under a daily schedule that tracks her every move. She pushes through the flu because stopping looks weak, then nearly dies from dengue fever and dysentery in Haiti with no help paying the bills. She falls in love with a Swiss farmer, settles at a new YWAM base, and builds a close friendship that will change everything. This is part one of her story. | |||
| Intro To Stories From YWAM: Loren Cunningham And The Seven Mountain Mandate (Updated) | 08 Sep 2026 | 00:37:32 | |
In this episode, Jay and Johnna introduce a new series featuring first hand stories from Youth With A Mission (YWAM). Before the storytellers share what happened to them, we take a step back and look at the roots. We cover who Loren Cunningham was, the Assemblies of God upbringing that shaped him, and how YWAM grew from a beach vision into a network of thousands of bases around the world with no central oversight. We also break down the Seven Mountain Mandate, an idea Loren helped start that has grown far beyond YWAM and now shapes today's political landscape. Along the way, we talk about how these beliefs and this structure can create a culture where abuse takes root and stays hidden, and we name some of the leaders still carrying this mandate forward today. References
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| ATBS "American Dominion: The Rise and Radicalization of a New Christendom" w/ Keri Ladner | 19 Aug 2026 | 00:51:13 | |
Keri Ladner is the author of American Dominion: The Rise and Radicalization of a New Christendom. Her book traces the roots of the New Apostolic Reformation (NAR) and Dominion theology in the United States. She began her research while studying the Columbine shooting and how it was later used to build the martyr myths tied to this movement. Ladner also writes about these topics on Substack. American Dominion: The Rise and Radicalization of a New Christendom - Book Link | |||
| Bel's Story / Sydney Anglican Diocese | 22 Jul 2026 | 01:24:41 | |
Bel joins us from Australia to share her story of growing up in a church in the Sydney Anglican Diocese. When she was six, she nearly died in an accident at church. Soon after, her family moved to a new church led by a man we call Rev T. He called himself a counselor and claimed he could help people no doctor could. Bel describes a community shaped by control, fear, and the constant feeling of being watched. She shares how Rev T's counsel tore her family apart, how her sister was sent away from home and put through an exorcism, and how a private meeting in his office crossed lines no pastor should ever cross. Today, Bel is a wife, a mom, and a survivor. She shares her story in the hope of making the church a safer place. | |||
| Jane's Story / Chi Alpha / Assemblies of God | 01 Jul 2026 | 00:57:37 | |
In this episode, our storyteller Jane shares her years inside Chi Alpha, the college campus ministry of the Assemblies of God (AG). What began as a warm, welcoming community slowly turned into something else. Jane describes the pressure to lead, the strict rules over her time, friendships, money, and even her food and health, and the spiritual control that kept her silent for years. She walks us through her path from new student to leader, intern, and full staff missionary. She talks about the leadership "class" she paid to take, a retreat that changed her, the support raising system that left her broke, and the moment she finally found the strength to leave. Jane also speaks to the wider abuse that has come to light in Chi Alpha and the Assemblies of God, and why she chose to break her silence now. Her story is a powerful look at high control religion, the savior complex on the mission field, and the long road to healing. Jane closes with a message of hope for current members, for survivors, and for the leaders she hopes will repent. Chi Alpha Survivor Website http://xalionsden.com/ | |||
| Michelle’s Story / IN | 08 May 2026 | 01:25:19 | |
Michelle shares her story of serving on staff at a church in Indiana, where subtle control, blurred pastoral authority, financial pressure, and spiritual manipulation slowly became clear over time. Her story names the confusion of being labeled, silenced, and pushed to question herself while navigating deep personal and family crisis. Through telling the truth, Michelle begins reclaiming the voice she was told to bury. | |||
| Katie’s Story / The Austin Stone | 17 Apr 2026 | 01:43:24 | |
Katie shares her story of growing up in a highly controlled religious environment, entering a young marriage shaped by strict gender roles, and spending years overseas as a missionary. Through the pressures of ministry, isolation, and motherhood, she began to recognize patterns of emotional and spiritual harm in her life. This episode follows her journey of unraveling those beliefs, finding her voice, and taking steps toward healing and freedom. | |||
| Katherine's Story / Austin Stone Church | 03 Apr 2026 | 01:07:36 | |
Katherine shares her journey from a young missionary sent overseas to confronting the realities of faith, sacrifice, and survival. Raised in the church and driven by a deep sense of purpose, she and her husband moved to the Middle East in their early twenties, navigating cultural barriers, personal risk, and the complexities of mission work. After experiencing trauma, health crises, and the unraveling of expectations, Katherine reflects on identity, belief, and what it means to rebuild life after everything changes. | |||
| Dominique's Story / The Austin Stone | 19 Mar 2026 | 01:20:17 | |
Dominique shares her experience at The Austin Stone, where she became deeply involved in church life, missions, and leadership development as a young woman. In this episode, she reflects on the pressure, isolation, racial dynamics, and harmful church culture she encountered, and why telling the truth about those experiences matters. | |||
| Alicia's Story / OH | 05 Mar 2026 | 01:35:59 | |
Alicia served for years as both a volunteer leader and staff member at a growing non-denominational church in Ohio. After becoming deeply involved in ministry and church leadership, she began noticing troubling patterns within the church’s culture and leadership structure. In this episode, Alicia courageously shares her story and reflects on the impact spiritual manipulation can have on individuals and communities. | |||
| Julia’s Story / PA | 12 Feb 2026 | 01:24:28 | |
In this episode of Bodies Behind the Bus, Julia shares her story of becoming involved in an Acts 29 affiliated church plant that gradually shifted from hopeful beginnings into a culture of control, blurred boundaries, and spiritual harm. As she navigated marriage struggles, postpartum depression, and increasing pressure from church leadership, Julia began to see how manipulation, unmet promises, and power dynamics shaped her experience. Her story offers an honest look at how environments that appear vibrant and supportive can also cause deep personal and spiritual wounds. | |||
| ATBS: w/ Ciji Wagner | 16 Jan 2026 | 01:01:32 | |
In this episode of Bodies Behind the Bus, we’re joined by Ciji, founder of Louder Than Silence, an organization providing free, trauma-specific care and community for survivors of sexual violence. Together, we explore what trauma-informed spaces actually look like, the difference between big-T and little-t trauma, and how harm often compounds in faith communities through misplaced authority, lack of boundaries, and spiritual bypassing.
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| Convo w/ Christy & Joshua Pt 3 | 19 Dec 2025 | 01:31:38 | |
In the final episode of this three-part series, Christy and Joshua come together to reflect on the shared impact of spiritual abuse and the long road toward truth and healing. Their conversation explores how harm reverberates through relationships, what accountability should look like, and what it means to move forward without erasing what happened. This closing chapter centers survivor clarity, connection, and the power of telling the full story. | |||
| Christy's Story / Anaheim, CA Pt 2 | 18 Dec 2025 | 01:34:42 | |
In Episode 2 of this three-part series, Christy shares her story of spiritual harm, silence, and survival within church systems that protected power over people. She reflects on the personal cost of being unheard, the impact on identity and faith, and the long road toward naming what happened. Christy’s testimony deepens the series by centering the lived experience of abuse and the courage it takes to speak after being dismissed. | |||
| Joshua’s Story / Anaheim, CA Pt 1 | 17 Dec 2025 | 01:54:15 | |
In Episode 1 of this three-part series, Joshua shares his story of spiritual harm, silencing, and the cost of telling the truth inside church systems built to protect power. His testimony traces the personal and relational fallout of abuse, the pressure to stay quiet, and the long road toward clarity and agency. This episode centers Joshua’s voice and sets the foundation for the series to come. | |||
| DACA FAMILY SUPPORT FUND w/ Caleb Campbell | 03 Nov 2025 | 00:43:58 | |
DACA Family Support Fund
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| Just Calling "Decolonizing our Budgets" | 29 Oct 2025 | 00:58:50 | |
In this episode of Just Calling, hosts Johnna and Jay continue their conversation with author and justice advocate Joash Thomas about his book The Justice of Jesus. Together, they unpack what it means to “decolonize our budgets” exploring how faith, money, and justice intersect within the modern church. The discussion challenges listeners to reimagine generosity, confront systems of privilege, and practice a faith rooted in tangible care for the marginalized. | |||
| Just Calling “Empire, Propaganda, & Protecting the Flock” | 17 Oct 2025 | 00:51:35 | |
In this Just Calling episode, the hosts talk about empire, power, and how faith communities are being influenced by political systems. The conversation unpacks a recent government filing showing efforts to target U.S. churches through digital campaigns and explores what faithful resistance looks like today. | |||
| Cameron’s Story / Peoria, AZ | 15 Oct 2025 | 01:32:36 | |
In this episode, Cameron shares his powerful story of serving for sixteen years at one of Arizona’s largest megachurches, a place where faith, control, and fear collided. From witnessing the enforcement of “alignment” policies to experiencing personal retaliation and deep spiritual betrayal, Cameron opens up about what it meant to lose his community while finding his voice. His courage sheds light on how systems of power can twist spiritual language to maintain control and how healing begins with truth. | |||
| Introducing Just Calling w/ Joash Thomas & BBTB | 30 Sep 2025 | 00:51:17 | |
Introducing Just Calling — In this first episode of the series, Bodies Behind the Bus sits down with author and advocate Rev. Joash Thomas to talk about his new book The Justice of Jesus. Together, we explore what it means to move from diagnosis to a hopeful prognosis for the church, diving into themes of justice, decolonization, and the everyday choices that shape faithful living. | |||
| ATBS: "Escaping Theonomy’s Grip" w/ The Bronson's | 08 Sep 2025 | 01:14:49 | |
In this episode of At the Bus Stop, we sit down with David and Margaret Bronson to uncover the dangers of Theonomy, Christian Reconstructionism, and the influence of leaders like Doug Wilson. The Bronsons share their personal experiences, explain how these teachings shape churches and politics, and discuss the lasting impact on survivors. They also highlight their work with Deconstruction Doulas and their efforts to build a Survivor Care Network that provides safety, healing, and hope for those leaving high-control religious environments. Their nonprofit is in the process of receiving 501(c)(3) status. Learn more and support their work at their GoFundMe page. Follow on IG @deconstructiondoulas | |||
| ATBS: “Recovering from Purity Culture” w/ Dr. Camden Morgante | 21 Aug 2025 | 00:48:51 | |
In this episode of Bodies Behind the Bus, we sit down with Dr. Camden Morgante, a licensed psychologist, author, and speaker. Dr. Camden is the author of Recovering from Purity Culture, a book that helps individuals move beyond harmful teachings and begin the journey of healing. She shares insights from her work with clients, her own experiences, and her research into purity culture, offering a compassionate perspective on how people can begin to reconnect with themselves and their faith. | |||
| ATBS: “Debriefing The Stone’s Statement” w/ Robert & Eric | 31 Jul 2025 | 00:55:46 | |
| Kenny’s Story / The Austin Stone | 22 Jul 2025 | 01:22:31 | |
In this episode of the Bodies Behind the Bus podcast, Kenny shares his experience in the worship residency program at The Austin Stone. He recounts his initial passion for ministry, his transition from law school ambitions to church work, and the realities of support-raising, manual labor, and lack of mentorship during his time in the program. Kenny also reflects on his concerns with the church’s culture of celebrity and financial practices, the exploitation he witnessed, and the broader systemic failures he observed. | |||
| James’s Story / The Austin Stone | 16 Jul 2025 | 01:44:08 | |
James shares his experience with the Austin Stone church, including his early motivations for moving to Austin, the challenges he faced as a Mexican American in a predominantly white evangelical institution, and the barriers to leadership he encountered despite his qualifications. He discusses his experience raising support, internal cultural tensions, tokenism, health struggles tied to workplace stress, and the events that led to his departure from staff. The conversation highlights systemic issues within church leadership structures, particularly around race, power, and access. *Correction: James references reading through MLK’s “I have a Dream” speech and wanted to clarify it was actually “Letter from Birmingham Jail” | |||
| Kelley’s Story / The Austin Stone | 09 Jul 2025 | 01:18:54 | |
Kelley joins the podcast to share her experience as both a former member of the Austin Stone church and staff member of its affiliated nonprofit, For the City. She discusses the church’s culture, internal power dynamics, financial mismanagement, and the challenges of working within a complementarian system. Kelley reflects on her personal story of spiritual and emotional harm, organizational dysfunction, and the long-term impact of abusive structures masked by ministry language. Her story highlights broader patterns of spiritual and institutional abuse within the Austin Stone and similar evangelical networks. | |||
| Ben’s Story / The Austin Stone | 01 Jul 2025 | 01:20:15 | |
Ben joins the Bodies Behind the Bus podcast to share his experience at Austin Stone Church, a large SBC-affiliated church in Austin, Texas. He reflects on his decade-long involvement, including leadership roles and the creation of a ministry for LGBTQIA+ individuals. The conversation explores church culture, leadership dynamics, personal transformation, and the challenges of reconciling faith with identity. Ben also discusses his departure from the church and the emotional and relational costs of stepping away from evangelical expectations. | |||
| B’s Story / The Austin Stone | 25 Jun 2025 | 01:38:04 | |
In this episode of Bodies Behind the Bus, B shares her deeply personal story about the emotional toll of navigating immigration, identity, and faith. B recounts her years at the Austin Stone Church in Austin, Texas, where she joined a residency program to serve the local Latino community, only to face institutional racism, cultural insensitivity, and burnout. Her story highlights the disconnect between church rhetoric and practice, especially around issues of justice, immigration, and diversity, and offers a candid look at the emotional and spiritual cost of being marginalized in faith-based spaces. | |||
| Intro to Stories from The Austin Stone | 24 Jun 2025 | 00:46:45 | |
In this episode, Johnna & Jay introduce a new four-part series investigating The Austin Stone Church in Austin, Texas. Joined by Board member Emily, they discuss the church’s influential role in evangelical culture, its connections to Acts 29 and the SBC, and a troubling pattern of abuse, cover-ups, and systemic harm within its leadership and programs. The episode highlights the church’s public image versus its internal realities, and previews the survivor stories that will follow in the coming weeks. | |||
| ATBS - The SBC Is Still Failing Survivors | 21 Jun 2025 | 01:00:59 | |
In this episode, Jay and Johnna debrief the 2025 Southern Baptist Convention annual meeting. They discuss why Johnna chose to attend alone, the deaths of two high-profile survivors—Jennifer Lyell and Duane Rollins—and the emotional and physical toll survivor advocacy has taken. They reflect on the SBC’s failure to follow through on promised reforms, the lack of accountability, and the ongoing harm caused by the institution’s refusal to meaningfully address abuse. The episode also explores the role of power, complicity, and silence within evangelical culture, as well as the broader implications for churches and Christian communities across the country. | |||
| BBTB - From Treaties To Tear Gas | 14 Jun 2025 | 00:10:23 | |
This episode examines the legacy of the Indian Removal Act of 1830 and draws a clear line from that policy to other moments of systemic injustice in American history—slavery, Japanese internment, discriminatory policing, and modern ICE raids. Through historical analysis and personal reflection, Jay challenges the narrative of American exceptionalism, exposes the role of the white church in reinforcing inequality, and confronts the systems that sustain white supremacy. | |||
| ATBS “Church Discipline” w/ Mollie Callahan | 30 May 2025 | 00:45:37 | |
Mollie Callahan, spiritual director and seminary student, joins to discuss the misuse of church discipline, its harmful impact, and how scripture has often been misapplied in these situations. She examines 1 Corinthians 5, Matthew 18, and stories like the woman caught in adultery, Zacchaeus, and the woman at the well to reframe church discipline through the lens of Jesus’ compassion, agency, and pursuit of the hurting. | |||
| Joyce’s Story / PCA / FL | 22 May 2025 | 01:38:08 | |
In this episode, Joyce shares her story of involvement in a PCA church in Florida and how her experience of marriage, faith, and community unfolded over more than a decade. She describes the early support her family received, her deep investment in church life, and how that shifted when she began raising concerns about her marriage. Joyce outlines the church’s response, her efforts to seek counseling, the process of pursuing divorce, and the consequences that followed, including church discipline. This episode examines how systems designed for accountability can fail those in crisis and how theological frameworks can impact the choices survivors feel they’re allowed to make. An update on Joyce’s situation is shared at the end of the episode. | |||
| ATBS: “Holy Paranoia” W/ Jared Stacy | 14 May 2025 | 01:07:05 | |
In this “At the Bus Stop” episode, Dr. Jared Stacy, a theologian and ethicist, joins Johnna and Jay to unpack the link between conspiracy theories, Christian nationalism, and the culture of abuse within white evangelical spaces. Drawing from his personal experience and academic research, Jared explores how storytelling shapes power, how conspiracy theories thrive in religious communities, and why many churches prioritize maintaining societal structures over faithful witness. The conversation also delves into the dehumanizing effects of disinformation, the role of the church in rural America, and what it means to follow Jesus in a moment of cultural and political disreality. Jared’s upcoming book offers language and insight for those wrestling with these complex dynamics. | |||
| Seth’s Story / Columbus, OH | 17 Apr 2025 | 01:18:46 | |
Be sure to listen to episode 79 “Alicia’s Story” to hear about her experience with this same pastor. | |||
| ATBS: Community, Accountability, and Care | 21 Mar 2025 | 00:55:02 | |
In this community conversation, the team from Bodies Behind the Bus responds to recent events involving The New Evangelicals and the release of a NetGrace investigation. They share their perspectives on accountability, integrity, and the responsibility of platforms in survivor spaces. | |||
| ATBS: “Becoming the Pastor’s Wife” w/ Beth Allison Barr | 18 Mar 2025 | 01:04:50 | |
In this episode of The Bodies Behind the Bus Podcast, we welcome Beth Allison Barr, historian, professor, and author of The Making of Biblical Womanhood and her latest book, Becoming the Pastor’s Wife. Beth shares her insights on the historical roots of patriarchy in the church, the erasure of women in ministry, and the complex role of pastor’s wives in evangelical spaces. She unpacks the ways in which women have been silenced, how the Southern Baptist Convention’s structures perpetuate inequality, and why understanding history is crucial to moving forward. | |||
| ATBS - “Fundie Cult Beliefs Going Mainstream w/ Christian Nationalism” ft. Margaret Bronson & Eric Isaac | 06 Mar 2025 | 01:35:13 | |
This episode of Bodies Behind the Bus features Margaret Bronson and Eric Isaac discussing the rise of Christian nationalism and its intersection with fundamentalist cult beliefs. Margaret shares insights from her experience in a high-control religious group, highlighting issues of female subjugation, the quiverfull movement, lack of education, and financial entrapment. Eric connects these experiences to broader patterns of spiritual abuse, coercion, and religious power structures. The conversation explores how extreme fundamentalist ideologies are becoming mainstream in America, their ties to white supremacy, and the political implications of these beliefs. Margaret’s ig: https://www.instagram.com/margaretrosebronson?igsh=cW5nbHZ1ZnQ4dTU0 | |||
| ATBS: “The Spirit of Justice” w/ Jemar Tisby | 25 Feb 2025 | 00:58:44 | |
Subscribe to Jemar’s Substack Here: Footnotes by Jemar Tisby | Jemar Tisby, PhD | Substack Buy “The Spirit of Justice” https://bookshop.org/p/books/the-spirit-of-justice-stories-of-faith-race-and-resistance-jemar-tisby/20859536?ean=9780310144854 “I Am the Spirit of Justice” for kids ages 4-7 https://bookshop.org/p/books/i-am-the-spirit-of-justice-jemar-tisby/21291875?ean=9780310145561 “Stories of The Spirit of Justice” for kids ages 8-12+ https://bookshop.org/p/books/stories-of-the-spirit-of-justice-jemar-tisby/21291877?ean=9780310145592 Additional Books by Jemar: https://jemartisby.com/books/ | |||
| Gracia’s Story / IHOPKC / Kansas City, MO | 20 Feb 2025 | 01:36:53 | |
Firefly Report | |||
| Crissie & Walker’s Story / Chapel Hill Bible Church / North Carolina Pt 3 | 30 Jan 2025 | 00:57:49 | |
Walker contact: walkerbbtb@gmail.com Crissie contact: inspiredifferences@gmail.com Link to Transcript from Concerned Congregant meeting (200 in attendance) - October 2021https://drive.google.com/file/d/1MUJ_ri2nuRP2vnAf6oU1iXIGljSVFHu3/view?usp=sharing Congregant Feedback Survey (leadership stated they didn't think there were any concerns following the October meeting, and then refused to start the GRACE survey (which was ready) in December 2021 so congregants did their own survey) https://drive.google.com/file/d/1P1Qx8_kx9AFLBwUdTHzLJ_CMlzni6bM8/view?usp=sharing NDA document -https://drive.google.com/file/d/11mn6mrHTZ4VVvEQAUHZnqwCgRd5IHlaS/view?usp=sharing Find more information, and future stories here - https://chapelhillbiblechurch.org/ Keep up with all things on X @CHBConfidential | |||
| Crissie & Walker’s Stories / Chapel Hill Bible Church / North Carolina Pt 2 | 22 Jan 2025 | 02:09:25 | |
Walker contact: walkerbbtb@gmail.com Crissie contact: inspiredifferences@gmail.com NDA document -https://drive.google.com/file/d/11mn6mrHTZ4VVvEQAUHZnqwCgRd5IHlaS/view?usp=sharing Find more information, and future stories here - https://chapelillbiblechurch.org/ Keep up with all things on X @CHBConfidential | |||
| Crissie’s Story / Chapel Hill Bible Church / North Carolina | 15 Jan 2025 | 01:42:53 | |
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| Gabby’s Story / Fusion, Spurgeon College | 23 Dec 2024 | 01:56:32 | |
| Sustaining BBTB 2025 & Beyond | 13 Dec 2024 | 00:17:39 | |
Support the podcast HERE, and thank you for daring to listen. | |||
| Grace & Dave’s Story, WI, EFCA | 12 Dec 2024 | 01:36:33 | |
| ATBS | Election Debrief w/ the Board | 26 Nov 2024 | 01:19:14 | |
Watch the video of this episode HERE | |||